You are on page 1of 5

Scott “Mossad” Murphy hates guns.

He can't hit a target with a handgun, and any weapons he can use
aren't easily concealed. However, his spycraft is second to none, and he's great with improvised
weapons, traps knows enough spy craft to survive when talking very, very fast doesn't cut it. He's the
sort of person who takes notes on a tv show called Burn Notice—which looks like one part MacGyver
for the dark side and the A-Team.

These are pages from the notebook of Scott Murphy:


#####################

* Ammonium Iodide—take one part ammonium, one part iodine, and stir well. Let it settle overnight,
and then, later, strain through coffee filter paper. Be very careful with the resulting little green crystals.
Enough crystals to cover your palm will be enough to blow off your leg if you step on them.

* How to bulletproof a car. Yellowpages can stop a non-Armor Piercing bullet; they penetrate an inch
into the phonebook, and they stop. If you add steel plate, it will only only penetrate a ¼ inch—line the
walls of the car with the phone book: put them and the steel behind the panels of your car, unless you
like swimming in phonebooks and yellow confetti. Put foam in the tires to make them bullet resistant,
and use dual layer plexiglass for the windows.

* Molotov cocktail: a classic that never goes out of business, mix some high proof alcohol into a glass
bottle, slip a rag into the mouth of the bottle... light rag, throw bottle, and you have a nice little
firebomb.

* Homemade hand grenades: A New York street gang in the mid twentieth century adopted a science
geek. He took a test tube and a stopper, then filled it with some interesting chemicals: glycerin, nitric
acid, and sulfuric acid. They separated the chemicals with a layer of parafin wax—basically, you can
use melted candle wax on each level of chemicals. Drive a nail through the stopper, and then through
the rest of the layers of wax, shake well, and throw away quickly before you blow your hand off: you
have just created nitroglycerin.

* Take a metal chain and wrap it around two power lines, and you've created an electrical circuit. It
certainly makes sparks fly, and acts as a great distraction. Highly illegal, so you better have a great
reson for taking out the power of up to two or three city blocks.

* Wrap a metal wire around the prongs of a plug—a paper clip will do. Plug it back into the wall,
watch all of the lights go out when the circuit breakers disagree with the effect.

* Use a cigarette as a time delay switch, and matches as a detonator. If you put multiple aerosol cans in
a garbage can, the cigarette burns down to the matchbook, and flares, heats the aerosol cans, which are
already under pressure. The effect is like puncturing the oxygen tank in Jaws, only on an obviously
smaller scale.

* Security cameras as easily overloaded. Flash the laser into a camera, you've just created your own
blind spot.

* An optical bug uses a laser against a window pane to pick up vibrations, enabling the listeners to hear
everything in the room. To detect it, take the infrared filter off of a digital camera, and it will pick up a
great big red spot on your windows. Your pictures won't be something you want in your photo album,
but you can be certain you're not being bugged.... unless you are being bugged, in which case, you wan
to give your listeners nothing but noise. With a listening device in your room, you can always turn on a
television, a shower, or a radio. With an optical bug, you can put a vibrating back massager against the
window; if the laser bug picks up vibrations, the massager will give them pure static.

# In the middle of Queens, New York, a Chicklets factory exploded. The reason: there were enough
dust particles in the air and on the floors to create an issue. A spark went off; that spark ingited a wave
of fire that set each individual particle of dust on fire instantaneously. You can recreate the effect with
baking powder made into a dust cloud. Or, for something a little simpler, use powdered nondiary
creamer powder to cut gunpowder, and you get a fireball full of sound and fury.

# If you must beat someone over the head with sports equipment, use a golf club, not a baseball bat: the
golf club has a smaller surface area, and the force isn't as distributed.

* Keys are wonderful inventions. The more the merrier. I prefer four per keyring—that way, should
you get into a tight corner, you can wrap your hand around the keyring, each key coming out between
the fingers of your fist. They make for some nice brass knuckles. They will hurt to use them, but I can
guarantee that they will hurt the other guy more. Also, if you are dealing with only one person, key
make for a nice, shiny distraction when you throw them at your attackers face, and plant a solid kick
between his keys.

* Wifi cameras are great in terms of surveillance—when you want to break in. Call in a bomb scare at
the building next door; the bomb squad's signal jammers will stop all cell phones, remote control bomb
detonators, and the wireless linkup of the camera.

* Always carry AT LEAST one good solid pen with you. A silver-colored, metal pen works best:
holding it like a knife can work well for you in a dark alley, filled with bad lighting —the average thus
sees something bright and shiny, moving quickly, they will hesitate for seconds, which is usually all
you need to get the hell away, or follow up with an attack. Holding an average pen in the middle, with
both ends sticking out of your fist, works if you're well acquainted with pressure points; jamming it
into the inside of someone's wrist (about an inch down along the forearm) will cause their fingers to
pop open, and ramming it behind their ear or into their temple will at least give them a bad headache, if
not disorient and/or knock them out.

* Metal pen (ONLY), holding it a like a knife: for instant kills, stab it into, and through: right behind
the ear, into the ear itself, under the chin (through the tongue), into the throat (all sorts of good things
there), the eye, or through the temple (if you can generate enough force). With a sturdy fountain pen,
you can stab someone in the kidneys, but I wouldn't rely on it a second time, and you'll probably never
write with it again.

* When you're feeling lazy about surveillance, or when your target is wary about someone sitting in a
parked car outside of their house, a web camera with a wifi hookup can work well for you. They're
cheap, reliable, hard to spot, and they'll stay in place if you use dental putty to anchor it. Webcameras
also come with night vision; it's more expensive, but worth it.

* Simply, keep your cash in a money clip, even a sturdy paperclip will do. And at least keep some cash on you
in that fashion even if it’s just a bunch of fives and a few singles. For preference sake, keep the money clip in
order of denomination, with the smallest dollar bills on the outside—from anyone’s point of view, it looks like a
collection of dollar bills. However, when someone comes up to you on the street and asks for your money,
they’re more likely to take into account your clothing and your body posture than money.

With the money clip, you just hold it up, and make sure their attention is firmly focused on it, then you hurl it to
the side, and run in the opposite direction while they eyes follow the money. Most muggers are just thieves, and
are most likely to just take the money and run. They’d really much rather not have a felony murder charge in the
making... unless they're aiming for a Darwin Award, then all bets are off.

A similar variation works for just plain running. If you’re the kind that throws away pennies, hold onto them,
they can work to your advantage if you keep them in one pocket… take a collection of them in your hand while
you’re “searching” for your money, then hurl it straight up, into your assailant’s eyes, making him cover up. If
you’re interested in running, you can add a sharp kick to the groin or solar plexus for good measure. Or, if you
want to put him down, you can use it as a distraction while you beat the hell out of him—if you have some idea
of what you're doing. If not, I suggest running.

* When escaping from a room when the hallway is flooded with security, or other unfriendlies, go
through the subceiling, since vents are too small unless you're a six-year old..
Murphy's Laws of Spying.

1. MURPHY WAS AN OPTIMIST

2. A relaxed spy is a dead spy.

3. Keep your head on your shoulders, or someone else will keep it…mounted on their wall.

2. The worse the weather, the more you are required to trail someone through it.

3. When your target drives to work every day like clockwork, the day you arrange for a car

bomb, he'll walk.

4. If your mission is going really well, it's a trap.

5. Throw rocks before grenades— it desensitizes the reflexes of who you're throwing them at.

6. And remember: five second fuses are three seconds long.

7. The easy way is always booby trapped..

8. When in doubt: improvise. It's hard to trace a bomb when it's made out of Bisquick.

9. Make it tough for the enemy to get in.... and you can't get out.

10. Even paranoids have real enemies.

11. The shortest distance between two points is money.

12. Never attribute to malice what can adequately be explained by stupidity.

13. Control the situation. If you can’t handle the variables, the variables are going to handle

you. The moment that happens, they will handle you right into a jail cell if you’re lucky, and a field

execution if you’re not.

14. The only thing more accurate than incoming enemy fire is incoming friendly fire.

15. Guns may be nice tools, but they leave behind other problems. Bodies are messy and hard

to dispose of unless you plan in advance. Try not to kill someone unless you really have to. And if you

have to, invest in plastic wrap, gloves, and hefty bags (see: Dexter).

16. The closer the synagogue the better the bagel.

17. The spy who plans for everything to go well is usually the one who will be shot in the back
with his own gun. Conversely, the spy who plans for everything to go to hell from the first minute will

never have to use a single contingency plan.

18. Invest in people. If you rely solely on a multimillion dollar piece of equipment, the more

likely someone is to circumvent it with something found at Wal-Mart.

19. “Guns make you stupid. Duct tape makes you smart.”

▪ Corollary 1: Tracers work both ways.

▪ Corollary 2: The seriousness of a gunshot wound is inversely proportional to the

distance to any form of cover

▪ Corollary 3: The complexity of a weapon is inversely proportional to the IQ of the

weapon's operator.

▪ Corollary 4: Friendly fire – isn't.

▪ Corollary 5: The day you need to clean your gun is the day the SWAT team arrives to

kill you.

▪ Corollary 6: A gun is hard to explain the security. A magazine you can roll up into a

tactical baton, isn't.

You might also like