I Can'tBearto (Not) -JVatch'Divas'

'High society' reality show isbig hot m6~SS,

but Ican't turn it off
On Oct. 4, a
new realityshow;
Dallas Divas
and Daughters,
premiered on
::iE Style Network.
o
(,) MERRm Through this
W
....J PATIERSON televised train
a. wreck, view-
o
w
a. ers are led to believe they're
C/) goingtogetararebutauthentic
ur
glimpseintothe livesofDallas
E
(,)
::..:: high societyvia five mother-
c::: daughterduosatthe top ofthe
<r::
a. socialfoodchain.
I'm not sure who was in
charge of casting the show,
but whoever it was, they
.should be fired. Like, right
this minute.
During Episode 1, view-
ers are "introduced to each COURTESY PHOTO
pair during a brief inter- Patty and Jacky share a moment during a scene from sY'e Network's Dallas Divas and Daughter~. .
view while regal titles like
"The Aristocrats" and "The mother, and her truly beauti- ing - NOTH]NG - wrong the future. Patty responds,
Debutantes" appear on the ful daughter Jacky, a recent with living in ( apartment. "Is there a charge for this?"
screen, giving us an idea of HPHS graduate. So when But the show's tagline is this: Butwait=thereallyawkward
what's to"come. they appeared on the screen "How do millionaire moms momenthadn'tevenarrived.
I had high hopes for Park I gasped, covered my face, deal with kid who want it At a localwine bar;the cast
Cities resident Patty,a single and watched the rest unfold all? Saddle u for real-life gatheredforaladies'nightout.
between the fingers I'd sepa- drama from th ~richest little The women began to scope
rated over my left eye. Not suburb in Tex s" out the scene and one joked,
because they were wearing Millionaire'moms live in "Howaboutthose chicksover
matching Burberry plaid apartments i Manhattan there?"Laughterensues.
miniskirts but because of but not usual If in the Park Then one of them says,
the text floating above their Cities.And I, along with the "I'm not there yet." Patty
heads: "The Wannabes." rest of Americ ,could see it asks, in a serious tone, "That
That's a crusher no matter was a really charming place, never went through your
how you look at it. mind?" Her co-star asserts,
OJ
I imagined them watching KEEP UP ONUNE "No."And Patty throws out, "
o the premiere on a strikingly "Whydo you lie?"
o
N gorgeousbut comfysofain an See blog.peopknewspapers. Then Patty breaks the
.-
to
0::
elegant mansion, maybe on
Lakeside,droppingWaterford
comforfullepisoderecaps. self-induced, jaw-dropping
silence by adding, "It goes
W"
00 crystal bowls full of popcorn but when the 're flashing through everybody'smind."
o
•.....
(,) and ChexMixwhen they saw up shots of the mansions the Seriously,Patty.Your kids
o the title they'd been given. I rest of the cast livesin, it left are goingto watch this show.
oct mean,theycouldn'thaveseen many wondering: What's up And Jesus can see it too. I
N
"that one coming. with that? bet the mayorknows about it
Or couldthey? Later, at a polo match, now.Everyoneheard you say+
Becausenot too much later supposedly where the inner it, Patty.I feel for you.
-we see-a dip ofthem arriving .cirele of Dallas carlbe found And for that reason, I hope
at their home as the words wearing enormous hats, a Episode 3 is a little more for-
"Patty and Jacky's apart- gentleman stri es up a con- giving.And I pray this thing
ment" cut across the screen versation wif Patty and is scripted.
to help us get our bearings. eventually tell her he'd like E-mail merritt@
Please.Stop.There's noth- to escort her t an event in peoplenewspapers.com
----- -------
 I imagined them watching the pr emiere ... and drop-
ping Waterford crystal bowls full of popcorn and
Chex Mix when they saw the titlEr'they'd been given."
-: ~ - MERRITT PATTERSON {See Page 2A.f' I,

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