July - August 2005 volume eighteen number four

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I was sitting on a chair at the side, close to the front. I watched most of the puja on the big screen because I was behind the big photo at the corner of the stage and couldnt see Shri Mataji. Children placed owers at Mothers Feet and then Her Feet were decorated with the kumkum. It was all very quick and, at the same time, done with meticulous attention and love. When the ladies who had been holding the sari went back to their places, I became aware that there was a clear path in front of me. All the ladies sitting there had moved. There was a straight line, like a path of moonlight on the ocean. It was the time for everyone to take photos. I stood up and walked forward, took a step to the left and found myself kneeling almost at Shri Matajis Feet. I had moved without thought, like being drawn by a magnet. Now I had a full, unimpeded view, so close, so clear. I marvelled at this gift. I was before the Lotus Feet of God, my Mother. And I could feel She knew I was there. The singing was raising the roof and She was in joy, hearing the joyful voices of Her children. She wiped tears from Her cheeks. Behind Her seemingly impassive face, I could feel Her huge loving smile. As I watched Her, I suddenly felt tremendous compassion. With it came the thought, Oh Mother, what you do for us! And straight away, I knew that the compassion was Hers, that compassion is one. Instantly that recognition became inexpressible experience. It began as a sudden feeling of expansion, emanating from Her. I could almost see it, but it wasnt seeing. Then it was of me, too. A huge expansion and I was inside it. My eyes stayed open, watching Mother, and I knew I was inside, inside the body of the Adi Shakti. For the rst time, I experienced the absolute knowledge of what that meant. At least, I glimpsed it. I was feeling the oneness, the drop becoming the ocean, where there is not the other. For the rst time, after all these years, I touched it. It was a gift from Her to me, kneeling before Her. I was kneeling at the Feet of God, feeling the power, feeling the vastness of it. It was not physical. There was no surge of energy. It was pure feeling, deep stillness, complete peace and a kind of knowingness. One Power, One Whole. And this is what I am. It was stunning. The next day, we drove up to the castle, the magnicent front entrance, and looked out over the valley. It was there. Then we went down to the river and it was there. I close my eyes now, as I write, and its there. Not like at the puja, but it exists. Its come into my experience. For years I have been asking and hoping for just one more chance to see Mother. Just once and Id be satised. It happened. Jai Shri Mataji! Katie Cartmel

S h r i A d i S h a k t i P u j a C a b e l l a L i g u re 19 J u n e 20 05

My Dream
You will never get these times again. You never had it in history and you can never get it in the future.

This is the most important puja because it is the power of Adi Shakti that has given you Self Realization, that has given you the truth, that has given you the power of compassion and love.
Thats the power that separated from Sadashiva. And this power wanted, Herself, to create this complete universe. Universes after universes, Shes creating and loving. With Her love, She did this great creation, creation of this world also.

This is a specially selected planet, which was very beautifully brought in the centre between the sun and the moon for the creation of, ultimately, the human beings. This is Her great work, with such love and affection, and with very great hope that Her children will know the truth and will get the ultimate knowledge about themselves and about everything else. As you have read in the Bible Adi Shakti came in the form of a snake and told human beings that you have to know the knowledge, to Adam and Eve and to Eve specially. And they accepted to eat the fruit of knowledge because they would have remained just like animals without knowing anything, the subtleties of life little higher animals maybe. Once they ate the fruit, they started feeling that there was something wrong the way they were without any clothes, so they brought some leaves of the tree and covered themselves. So the rst knowledge that came was of chastity because Shri Ganesha was established and His inuence brought forth S h r i A d i S h a k t i P u j a this consciousness that we have to cover our bodies, we are no more animals. C a b e l l a L i g u re With the knowledge of chastity, gradually human beings 3 J u n e 20 01 started growing into beautiful nations, but there are so many things which were still to be known, to be aware of it. You may be aware of many things, but unless and until you get your spiritual awakening, unless and until you get your self knowledge, all other knowledge is absolutely nothing. With this self knowledge only, you become powerful. The real power is of love and compassion.

Today when you see the whole world is busy ghting and they are trying to protect people from wars and creating great, huge, protecting instruments, the whole world seems to be in a mad race of killing each other, of destroying each other, of competition, ambition, leading to ghting and then to greater wars. Theyre ghting for a piece of land. So ignorant they are. Can you carry even a pinch of this land with you when you die? When you are born, you come with closed sts. And when you die, you go with open hands. What do you take with you? All right, you may not like to take anything, but do you enjoy whatever you think is so great, for which you are ghting? Why is this ghting going on among all nonsensical people? Its surprising how people give up their peace, give up their understanding when it comes to a piece of land. And the whole thing has moved into a very wrong direction and is going towards complete destruction. This is the thing that has made human beings so much suffering because of all their ignorance, by which they have all those habits, all those attractions, all those identications.... They have to take to sense and ... to their self knowledge. Self knowledge is the key for a saviour to give to people. We have had so many saints. We have had so many Sus. We had Tao people. We had Zen people. All kinds of realized souls came on this Earth. They all suffered. They were tortured. Nobody understood them. But now the time has come for you to know the truth, but truth which is not dry, truth which has compassion, truth that encompasses everyone, that brings the complete view of our existence. Why are we here on this Earth? What is our purpose? What should we do? Adi Shaktis powers are such, of love and compassion, that they make you understand your Self rst. Love, for you, is very, very limited. Theres no awareness of your own being. Just imagine what a great task it is for you, how much you have to be seriously becoming aware of your Self rst. That is extremely important. First you have to be aware of your Self. And now you have the light of your spirit. In the light of that spirit, you can see what you are and you can see how far you are going, how wrong things you are doing, what harm you are doing to yourself and you have a power to cure it, to improve it and to come to your senses. These are the most important times. You will never get these times again. You never had it in history and you can never get it in the future.... Youre not to be afraid of Me, but be afraid of yourself. You have to watch yourself and see for yourself what have you been doing so far. What have you done so far because you have been enlightened? If the enlightened people cannot give light, whats the use in having them? Look at these little, little candles. Whatever little light they have, theyre giving that light. Theyre burning themselves to give that light. If we cannot give that light, what is the use of enlightenment? Enlightened doesnt mean the light for yourself only. It is the light of love, compassion, which is divine, which is not normal, which is not ordinary as you see in the lms. It is a divine love which works. After getting the highest, why do you want to go so low as that?... You have not realized what you have got and you dont respect yourself. Still, if you are on the same line and the same level, I must say you have done no justice to Me or to yourself.... Such beautiful birds I have discovered. But you must keep your lustre and work it out. Ill be very happy to know that Sahaja Yoga is spreading with leaps and bounds, with great speed and that people are really getting into that realm of peace, joy and happiness. Thats My dream and I hope you all may work it out.

Self knowledge is the key for a saviour to give to people.

the Queens veil

G e n o v a I t a l y M ay 20 05

I would like to share with you some feelings I had when travelling from Cabella to Shri Matajis new house in Genova. It felt for me like an epic journey, full of subtle meanings and events. Shri Mataji was travelling in Her car on the motorway. The car was proceeding gently along the curves, in the middle of the carriageways. Behind Her, seven cars full of yogis, luggage, silent amazement, bubbling joy. They were occupying both lanes of the motorway and were following, owing behind Her like the queens veil. All other cars that were coming too fast from behind had to slow down, staying in the queue for some time and, after being allowed to pass, proceed with humility. The travel went on through some apparent difculty: lots of trafc, lots of work on the road, accidents, a huge truck on its side, another car upside down something never seen. But Mothers car was still owing gently amidst that chaos, showering divine blessing at Her mere sight. We reached the town of Genova at about 9 pm. It was a magnicent view as Mothers car was going along the seaside road, while on the hills the lights of the city were beginning to light up. It felt just like a holy day, when rows of tiny lights are lit as a joyous welcome to the deities. The city of Genova had paid its homage to Shri Mataji.

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GENOVA

Mothers villa is on top of a hill, which overlooks the whole city. So when we reached the bottom of the hill, the veil became suddenly a serpent of cars spiralling along the hill. At its head, Shri Adi Kundalini was pushing through the tight road, with the seven cars behind, in a row. The city was amazingly silent, as if witnessing a historic event: the Mother of the Universe heading towards the Sahasrara of the city. And Her advent in Genova had been announced just a few days before. After Sahasrara Puja, the main newspaper of Genova published on three separate pages front page, national news page and local news page the news about the puja. That article was so visible that two main news agencies also published news feeds about the event at a national level. A smaller TV network came to interview Shri Mataji. After waiting outside for more than two hours, apparently restless, but unaware of bathing in the divine vibrations, they had the opportunity to have the darshan of Shri Mataji for about one minute. We were a bit worried about what they could ask and what would be their attitude, but the only question they were able to utter was Shri Mataji, how do you feel with all the love and affection of the yogis who come from all over the world to Your Feet? Shri Mataji answered with Her immensely loving smile, Very good! And lo, they went. Many people saw the interview on television and told us about it very happily. But no yogis saw it. After all, the announcement was not for us. It felt for me as if Shri Matajis divine work was at last becoming more and more evident to the world. From the top of that hill, in fact, Shri Mataji sees the whole city and the sea. And She can be seen from the whole city as well. And now that silent joy lls up the surroundings of the villa in Genova. A gentle breeze sweeps the hill, day and night. One day, Shri Mataji walked holy steps in the garden and then sat for more than an hour, watching the panorama. The Supreme Queen of the Sahasrara called only three little children to Her Lotus Feet. They offered owers and their pranaam. And She smiled with radiant eyes. Marco Arciglio

The city was amazingly silent.

28 August 1973 Mumbai

Shri Krishna Puja

If I know only My head, that is not sufcient. If I know only My neck, that is not sufcient. If I know only My legs, that is not sufcient. But the more I know about Myself, the more dynamic I become, the more expansive I become. And all the great that existed, or all the people who were called as great, are great because

they lived in many human beings.

That tune of love

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Everywhere in the whole world we have brothers and sisters who are on their inner being.

I feel that warmth in the atmosphere, as you are feeling, because you know they are not foreigners. They are your brothers and sisters. Once two brothers met in a jungle, but they thought that they were enemies and they wanted to ght with each other. And when they came to blows, they couldnt hit each other. And then they took out their arrows. The arrows wouldnt work. They were quite surprised at this and when they asked each other, Who is your mother? they found out the mother was the same. And then they realized that they were not foreigners, neither were they enemies, but they were made of the same bre. What sweetness, what beauty that knowledge has given them.... We are bound together with that love. Love is strong When I talk of love, people think that I am trying to make you weak people because people think that those who love are weak. But the most dynamic power in this world is that of love. The most aggressive power is that of love. Even when we suffer in love, it is out of our strength that we suffer and not out of our weakness. The love that I am talking about, the divine love, makes you not only strong, but dynamic. It is the greatest, luminous power that we can think of. Only when love is surrounded by gross and is lost in the gross, it looks as if it is weak and under chains. At the time it is released, the dynamic power of love can transcend all the evil powers of the world. When there is any opposition from anywhere, you shun it and sit away from it. You dont want to face the opposition, any negative opposition, whether it is by speech or even by evil methods. We run away from that, thinking, Oh my God, how are we going to face this? On the contrary, a person who is negative, who has got hatred, is a person who talks big. He thinks hes above everybody else. He takes a responsibility upon himself. By his method, people get impressed and they all start to fall at his feet, while the realized sits at home quietly, wondering, What are these fools doing? But it is not now for the realized to sit down and to wonder and laugh at the foolishness of the people who are not yet realized, not even to take pity on them, but to come out, come out with the sword of love, to win the whole world. It is very, very essential. If the creation has to be saved, then you are not to keep mum about it. All the wrong ideas about love, all the falsehood about love has to be given up. One must know that it is the dynamic power. And it wont allow you to sit comfortably with yourself, enjoying the peace and the bliss, when the rest of the world is not enjoying that and is playing into the hands of these evil geniuses who have come in this world to destroy, to bring the satanic realm on this Earth. Today is the day to brighten up your understanding about your own strength that is with you. Those who are gross should worry about their insecurities and their problems and their organizations, but not for the people who are realized.

SHRI KRISHNA PUJA 1973

Come out with the sword of love, to win the whole world.

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You are never alone You are never alone when you are realized. There have been many people who have been realized, before even you were born, who exist, who are anxious to help you at every moment. Once we went to the market and there was a problem about something and I had somebody with Me, a disciple.... I just wanted to see what will be his reaction. He tried to argue out with the person, to tell him about something. So he told Me, Mataji, let us go now. When we came out of the shop, I said, What are you going to do about it? He said, I have already told Hanuman to look after that part. And the work was done. It is gross, but it happened. You can leave it to any one of them and they will jolly well have to do it because it is you who are on the stage and not them. Theyre the background people. They are the playback. But you must open your mouth, otherwise if they start speaking, what will people say? They are going to help you in every way, but how far are you standing on your security? How far are you standing on your property, on your understanding?

I am nothing but the embodiment of that love.

The great war Its a great war going on. You are not aware of it. For you to be so feeble, you are still just small children, no doubt, because you got your Realization only a few days back. But if you want, you can grow very fast. You can grow into big, great giants. All of you can grow. Only thing is that you have to decide that you have to grow within. There are so many things that you only have discovered, by which a person grows. I can give you food, but you have to grow yourself. Wherever you see the negativity, you have to stand up and say, This is the negativity, and nothing else, whether you like it or not. In that, you love that person. Only talking sweetly is not the idea of love. A mother sometimes even scolds the child. It doesnt mean that she doesnt love. If it is necessary, you have to tell the person that it is negativity. Of course, if there is a realized person, he wont mind the correction because he wants the correction. He knows that it has to be correct. The instrument has to be corrected. But a person who doesnt understand, you have to force your love on that person. Many people have tried putting love around people who are trying to be mischievous and they have been able to create great results. Those people have turned back and come back. Only by putting your hand and putting your attention on that person and moving this hand the love encircles and the person comes back. There is no doubt that there is negativity and positivity, nothing in between. This you must remember. There is no compromise between the two. Either it is light and darkness or it is positive and negative. Denitely there are two things that are ghting. If you have the will to be a giant that loves, you can be. For love, the satisfaction is only love, that you love another person. You just show your love, I said, and you will see it will work out. Just decide I am going to love. And once you decide that, the whole heaven, the whole power of the heaven will fall at your feet. You believe Me in this. If you see otherwise, I am an ordinary housewife. In the hands of God Some people say, Mataji, how can we be like You? Why not? I am just like you. I have the same problems as you have, but the only thing I know is that I am nothing but the embodiment of that love of this Divine. And I cant exist without it. [You should say,] Every moment of my life let the love ow. Let every wave of my mind convey the love. And that makes you completely powerful. They are anxious to be loved. You will be surprised to know that if you really love them, they themselves come to Me and say, Give me salvation, Mother. They come to Me only for that. And if I promise, they take the birth again. The Kali Yuga has laid a beautiful stage and a wonderful drama is to be played in which the Ravanna has to love Sita as a mother. The Kamsa has to fall at the feet of Radha. You have to be in the hands of God completely.... When the songs of their strength and victory are sung all My chakras, how they start working in you, vibrating. It is going to work through you. The time when love has to rule, the Satya Yuga, if it has to come, it is going to be through your efforts. Now, before Sahaja Yoga, no efforts, but now all your efforts are divine. Whatever you do, whatever sympathetic you activate, you are getting it through the parasympathetic. You dont do anything at all. But you can see yourself what stakes are involved.

SHRI KRISHNA PUJA 1973

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You are saints To be the channels of that divine love, that dynamic power, which is going to transform the whole conception of hatred on which all these nations and all these differences are created, it looks sometimes, How? How can it be? But now the days are gone of Gopal when Krishna used to play His ute. Then He tried His Sahaja Yoga on His gopis and the gopas. Oh, we tried and tried and tried in different lives. Nothing worked. And now it is going to click with a spark. A chain reaction will start. But we have to have strong machines to carry it. Otherwise the fuse will be off. Only the strength which is felt in you is to be felt by your attention. Thats the only thing that you have to do. Feel your attention and give up all that is falsehood. All that is falsehood, you see within yourself and you give up all that is falsehood and you drop it. Accept all that is only the truth and the truth will give you that power. You cannot be egoistic if you try to be. You cannot harm anyone even if you want to. Many of you have expressed that Mataji, you are giving it to every Dick, Tom and Harry. I cannot give it to Dick, Tom and Harry. It has to be a man who has been searching for it. It has to be a woman who has been searching in her previous lives. You should know, whatever you have got it, you have got it in your own right. So a person may look like a Dick, Tom, Harry, but hes not. Hes a great saint. Youre all saints sitting here. Its a centre, a nucleus of saintliness where the complete divine is owing. The only thing is let it ow out from you. This power is that of God and it is not your responsibility to worry as to whether it will do good or bad. Even if you may think that it may do some bad thing according to the moral sciences of this world, ultimately it is going to be all right.

Now it is going to click with a spark.

A perfect flute for my Lord to play that tune of love

S H R I K R I S H N A P U J A 1973

So many things one has to learn from a dog.

They are wonderful things. Theyre beautiful. Youd better keep the dog. I have a dog, too. Its with My daughter now. When I go to India, when I have to go to My daughters place, I wear a very ordinary sari because I know he will, as soon as he hears My voice, hell come jumping and jump all over Me, lick Me and also show his anger because Ive left him. And his eyes will have tears. Even he may tear My sari out of it. And when Im coming and lling My bag with things, it knows. Then it goes and sits and sulks and doesnt eat food for eight days when I leave. I mean I go every second year, but hes not forgotten even My voice. Its an old dog now, very old. I think for his species, hes outlived. His name is Deepak. It means the light. Hes absolutely white. Hes the spitz... But it is big for its own breed.... But dogs have a capacity to learn. I have taught this dog how to do puja. He used to touch My Feet and he would never lick My Feet. He would lick My sari, but never My Feet. And he knew how to use a w.c., can you believe it? All sorts of things he knew. You can teach him so many things. It used to discriminate even the footsteps of every person in the house. And he never liked nudity of any kind. One Yugoslav lady came with her short not very short, but with a frock, you see. And the legs were showing. And he started barking at her. She wasnt mannerly like that. So I had to give her a towel to cover her legs while she was talking to Me. Shri Mataji Nirmala Devi, during an informal talk in France

He is the artist. But you are the instruments.

The ght is within Why was that Kamsa to be killed? Why was Ravanna to be killed? Of course, killing doesnt help much. That I have realized. All those that are killed are back again in the saddle. But still, you dont ght those horrible people. You just ght yourself out. You just watch yourself. Where are you? What are you doing? Are you on the divine or on the gross? Just think about it every moment, every moment you are in meditation. Just think of the moment and the dynamism of that moment, the complete power that is lling every moment, just waiting to go inside you. It will ow in your Sahasrara and inside your being and completely revolve around your whole being and transform the inside of you to a complete divine power. Allow it to come in. Accept it. Accept it without any fear. Its a very vicarious time.... I have only two hands. You can see that very clearly. I can do everything, but not to make you do something. Your will will be respected throughout. Every other thing can be looked after, except for one that you should be a perfect machine, a perfect channel, a perfect ute for my Lord to play that tune of love. It is for you to clear out all your seven holes. It is for you to clear out your hollowness and for you to be complete within yourself. And He knows His job. He is the artist. But you are the instruments. And the harmonious music from so many souls can ll the ears of these evil people and can penetrate into their heart and put love into them and maybe that they themselves will give up their evil ways and fall at the feet of love. Krishna is to be born within you today. A ve year old boy went to kill Kalya. That Krishna is to be born within you. He went and sat on the Kalya Sahasrar and was pressing with His Feet and all the people were seeing this great drama of Krishnas dancing on the Kalya Sahasrara. Krishna is to be born within your being.... Let us now go to the state which is beyond words, beyond thoughts, into the realm of thoughtless awareness where the Divine is pouring Its blessings. With this puja you get the Mothers protection to begin with and My chakras, when they start moving, they give you special powers of love and bless your chakras and ll them up completely. The blessings of My being will ow to you automatically.

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Sleep, Dreams and Beyond

There is a nadi which passes through the left Vishuddhi into the Heart. It starts from the heart, goes up, passes through the Agnya. It has four petals. It opens up. This is the one which gives you the state which is called as turya. We live in three states. In the awakened state, jagruti, our attention goes to this, that and all that. We spoil our attention. But the second one is the one that we call ... sleep. When we sleep also all these things that have happened come to us from our past and things like that. But then we go to the deeper sleep called as sushupti. It is a state where you have deep sleep and you dream of something that is reality also. You may dream about Me. Its like the ethereal part of the subconscious where some beautiful information is passed on. Supposing Ive come, say, to Italy. Italians might know in their sushupti that I have come.... But the fourth state is called as thurya.... The fourth state is where you are in a thoughtless awareness state.... When there is no thought, you have to be innocent. When there is no thought, you have to have vibrations. When there is no thought, you cannot be attached to anyone. So into that thoughtless state you have come now. It is the thurya state. And in this state, when you are, these four petals, which are within you, have to open out in your brain. They come from your heart to your brain and that is when you absolutely understand what is God, absolutely know what is God. That is the time when one receives the real knowledge.... Thats the real knowledge. It is to know what is God. And if that is God, then how can you suspect anything? How can you try to analyze anything? Its God. Its God Almighty, which knows everything, which does everything, which enjoys everything. That is the one, we should say, is the gnyana, is the knowledge, is the true knowledge, the pure knowledge. It is not the knowledge of chakras, not the knowledge of vibrations, not the knowledge of kundalini, but the knowledge of God Almighty. And the knowledge of God Almighty is not mental. Again, I tell you, it starts from your heart and goes to your brain, something that comes out of your experience of joy and covers your brain. So your brain cannot deny it any more.... To know that you know God, itself is so great. Whatever it is She may be Mahamaya, She may be anything but I know. It cannot be described in one book. It cannot be described in a hundred books. It cannot be described in words, but to know that is God after all, thats God, God Almighty. And that gives you that beautiful surrender where you just feel absolutely secure in that ocean of love. I wish you all to achieve that state. Shivaratri Puja 1991

It is not the knowledge of chakras, not the knowledge of vibrations, not the knowledge of kundalini, but the knowledge of God Almighty.

In the dream She guides you.

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Mahakali ... is the one who relaxes you completely. When you are tired and fed up, when you dont know what to do, then She makes you sleep. Shes the one who gives you sleep. All the days work you do, ultimately the Mahakali power acts on you as sleep. She makes you sleep, sleep like a child. You know, at that time, all that wrong we have done to ourselves and to others is forgiven. In Her lap we sleep nicely, quietly and all our problems are solved. In those dreams, when you are, She brings forth solutions to you. I know so many people who told Me, Mother, you came in my dream and told me that this is the medicine you should take. You came in my dream and You told me that this particular type of life will suit you. They see Me clearly coming, but there it is not the whole of Me, but I think the Mahakali power acts. Into very deep sleep you are. It is called as the sushupti. There She appears. One lady came to Me and she said, Mother, You came in the dream and you said that Im here in Bombay. Nobody told me. So many things happen like this. In the dream, She guides you and tells you. Mahakali Puja 1993

ari S
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Thousands and thousands, millions of years back, the Mother Earth started producing Her Ganesha. It was rst a huge ocean where the Himalayas stand. The Himalayas gradually started coming out of that ocean in a at way, like a shivalinga, which is the expression as the manifestation of the animals. They have the brains which are at. But when the Himalayas started coming out of that sea, the Mother Earth was pushed on the sides. And the Mother Earth started giving folds to Her sari, you can say. Now, when that movement started, the sari gave waves of vibrations in such a way that, at certain points, it rose up to a point becoming like Shri Ganesha.... But then, still more folds started coming up much later, when the human brain started developing its ego. So the whole of that land was pushed up and another land joined it in such a manner that it formed an apex. The superego was pushed in and was brought to the climax. That synchronizes with the human brain because the whole universe is represented in our body as well. Now, the central axis of the Mother Earth acted as the spinal cord. By this happening in the Himalayas, again there was a big push onto all the mountains, which were to be created as Shri Ganesha and they got into their nal forms. And the apex was created. Shri Ganesha Puja 1984 Shri Krishna was an incarnation of the Virata, the master of masters, we should say. When Draupadi was in trouble Draupadi was actually Vishnumaya, His sister She thought of Shri Krishna. Her sari was being pulled by Dushasana. She only said, Kri. She wanted to say Krishna, but She thought, If I say Krishna, it will fall down. As soon as she said, Shna, the sari dropped down. Then she described about Shri Krishna.... That sound went into Dwarika. Now where is Dwarika and where is Asinapur? at least the distance of at least two thousand miles. But the sound went through the chaitanya and made a big sound there. Shri Krishna came to save the chastity of His sister. Immediately. Spontaneously. That moment. He could have said, All right, let it be. Let one sari come out, two, then Ill go later. Im sure He must have stolen My saris which you give for My pujas which are too many. Thats what I feel, that from where did He get all these saris to give it to Her? It must be from My own storage. Im sure and thats why you have given Me so many saris, so that He can save the chastity of many women. Shri Krishna Puja 1991

Such great women we have had in this Maharastra, where you nd them to be so mild. If it comes to their country, if it comes to their own personality, to their own chastity, anything, they are tremendous, just like lionesses. So with this sari, lots of things go hand in hand. Its not only these saris you are wearing, but you are representing something very dynamic within yourself. Sangli Puja 1990

You want Me to talk about My life. Life, its so long. I am sixty-two completed and sixty-three started. Im an old woman now. Its a long life.

I am a story teller.
It is something like an autobiography.
Lebensbilder TV show
I belong to a family of very enlightened people. My father was a linguist and he was master of fourteen languages. He knew about twenty-six languages and he translated even 9 July 1986 the Koran into the Hindi language. My mother was, in those days, an honours in mathVienna ematics. So both were very well-educated and enlightened people. At the time of My birth, My mother dreamed something which she could not explain. But after that she had a great desire to go and see a tiger in the open eld. My father was a great hunter because tigers were a menace in the area where we were living. It was a hill-station called Chindwara. So there was a king who was very much interested in My father. Somehow or another a letter came that there was a tiger, a very big tiger, and they were frightened of him, that he might be a man-eater. So My father took My mother and moved to that place. And they were sitting in what we call as a machan, where they built something for people to sit on top of a tree, from where they can shoot nicely. And then, My mother told Me that a big, huge tiger of very big size, very beautifully appeared on the eld and she felt tremendous love for the tiger. It was a full moon day and she felt extremely compassionate towards the tiger and when My father raised his gun to shoot, she stopped and she wouldnt allow him. The tiger went away and he never came to that forest again. But that made My father think, because he himself was a realized soul, that this must be somebody what we call a goddess Durga, who is fond of the tiger who must be born to My mother because the symptoms were rather funny that the lady should like to see a tiger. So he told My mother, Now are you satised? because they were struggling with the gun. He said, Is there a Durga sitting in your womb, that you are trying to protect the tiger? She said, Yes, yes. So stop it now. I wont allow you.

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My father, being a realized soul, he felt tremendous vibrations from Me.

Like that, there were many incidents in My life... When I was born, My mother didnt feel any labour pains or anything. Just I was born. She didnt know how. And I had no blood on My body, nothing. I was clean, washed. Thats why they call My name as Nirmala. But My grandmother said that she should be called as Nishkalanka. That means the one who has no spots on her. But thats the name of a man. They said, All right, we call her Nirmala, meaning the same immaculate. Then My father, being a realized soul, he felt tremendous vibrations from Me and he felt that this life is great and she will do something great in this life. I do not know why, but I dont know if he dreamed or he understood it, but all the time if I remember when he talked to Me he used to say that You have to nd out the way of giving en masse Realization. As I told you, he was a great scholar of so many things and a very widely read man. So he gave Me a good education in religion, in different religions and also a good education about human beings. What are their problems? Why do they react like this? Why dont they take to God? Why are they hypocritical? All kind of things he said to Me. He also knew about kundalini, but not so much. Of course, when I was born, I knew all about kundalini Myself. I knew all about it from My very childhood. So I was a very aware person, extremely aware, but I didnt know who to talk to because, you see, people did not have that awareness. You cant talk to everyone like that. So I was regarded as a very jolly person, at the same time very serious also, very deep. And then I started My studies as a child. I was not very much interested in the studies, but I used to do very well. I used to read the lives of great men and things like that. At a very young age, I read George Bernard Shaw. When people were reading Great Expectations, I was reading Bernard Shaw. But as such, I did not have any interest in particular in reading some textbooks because I thought they were childish and there was nothing to be read about it. Then I told My father that I have to do medicine. So he said, Why? I said, Because I have to talk to doctors. He said, You have to talk to doctors? Yes, I said. But it so happened in My childhood, when I was about seven years of age, My father was a congressman. He had joined congress when I was four years of age. He used to live with a style very westernized, you see. We had governesses and all that. He threw away everything and he became a real Indian. Then he made us study our languages. Sanskrit he made us study in an Indian school, not in a missionary school because missionaries were very unkind. They threw us out of the school when My father was in the congress. They were against us completely.

I was a very aware person, extremely aware, but I didnt know who to talk to because people did not have that awareness.

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Mahatma Gandhi liked me very much. He said, Leave this child here.

Then at the age of seven years, I happened to go with My father to Mahatma Gandhi. He was about seventy miles living from us. But the rst time he took Me down and Mahatma Gandhi liked Me very much. He said, Leave this child here. So I had not even taken clothes or anything to stay there and My father sent to Me everything.... Gandhi was very fond of Me, but I was a little girl. But he understood that there was something about Me. He consulted Me on very serious problems sometimes, surprisingly. Like one day, he wanted to make the prayer book so he asked Me, How should I put these series? and all that. So I told him how to put the series and he put the series in that way. I used to go back for My school and again to go back to Gandhiji, every year like that. And he called Me Nepali. He gave Me a name, Nepali. Everybody used to call Me Nepali at that time. Gandhiji was a tremendous man. One had to learn a lot from him. He was not at all a hypocrite, thats one thing. And he was not like a modern politician who says something and does something wrong. He was very outspoken and always he put himself on the testing point. And he used to confess if he made mistakes immediately. One very great incident I remember when I was a small child. They were having a meeting together and we girls were there only sitting, giving them water and things to all the people. All the big people were there. Like Jawaharlal Nehru was there also and Mollana Azad. All these people were sitting there. They were discussing something and then suddenly Mahatmaji said, Now its very late. We will have lunch here. So they said, Yes, yes, we will have lunch here. They had to go to the guest house, which was far away. So Mahatmaji asked for Bai, his wife. She had gone out. So he got up. He had a key with him, you see, always of the storeroom. He opened the storeroom and he asked the people who were in charge of cooking to measure everything according to the people there properly everything, you see. And then, when they measured it out, everything was done, then he put the key back and then he went and sat there nicely. So these people said, Bapu, we did not know you have to take so much trouble, you see, to go all the way looking for her. It didnt take much time, about fteen minutes, but still. So he said, What do you think? This is the blood of My country. I cannot allow it to be wasted. See, thats the sign a person who understands the value of public money. I grew up with him very intimately. He was a very, very kind person for children. Otherwise, he was an extremely strict man, with himself and with others, very strict a big disciplinarian. And he would make everybody get up at four oclock, have your baths, everything, be ready for your morning prayers at ve oclock, you see. And he used to walk very fast. I also learned walking fast with him. In his company, I had to walk fast. And he was extremely loving and a very nice person. And he would listen to Me because I was a child. Supposing I forced him to eat more or something, then he would have laughed and accepted. He was a very kind person.

But with others, he was very strict and I used to tell him that, Why are you strict with everyone? He said, But you are a little girl. You got up in the morning time. Why cant they get up? I said, I am little. Thats why I get up. They are big, so they cant get up. Like that, you see, a little child.

STORY-TELLER

And then My father went to jail. And My mother also went to jail ve times. My father went to jail twice, once for about two and a half years and he was the only supporting member of the family. By the way, we came from a very old royal family, which is called as Shalivahans. They have a calendar also in India. And then, when they took My father to jail, we had to leave our house and we had to live in huts and we had all kind of problems. But also Me, they pestered a lot because I helped many people there. I joined the 42 Movement and in a very serious way and I became a leader of the young people. I thought, Unless and until I take a very positive stand, it may not work out with them. Its not gracious to say how they tortured me, what they did to Me. But they really tortured Me. I was a young girl of nineteen years at that time. Its over now, so it is nished. And after that, My father went to jail again and then, when he came back, he got elected as the member of the Central Assembly, later on as the Constituent Assembly and then of the Parliament. My brother was also a member of the Parliament later on, as well as a minister in the cabinet. Another brother is a high court judge in Bombay. Theyre all doing well despite the fact that our parents neglected us in a way because they gave their lives for the country, but, you see, that never deterred us from studies and we came up very well. When I was in the 42 Movement, My college justiciabled me from the college and threw Me out and I had to go to another college to study far away from My house, in Punjab. But I studied for two years. Science I did. Then I did My medical. I didnt do it fully because just after that the 1947 riots broke out. So the college was closed and I didnt want to know more because what I wanted to know, I think I knew. So I did not need and I got married. You must have heard My husbands work was the secretary-general of the International Maritime Organization. He held very high positions. He was also secretary to Lal Bahadur Shastri, who was our prime minister, who was another very great man. But he did not survive long. If he had survived, things would have been different, I think, for our country because he was a Gandhian, an out and out Gandhian, and he lived like it, an ideal Gandhian personality. So thats how the life went on. But the inner being was still seeking the way and methods of giving en masse Realization. My father said, Before you develop this technique of giving en masse Realization, dont talk of religion. Let nobody know that you know anything

The inner being was still seeking the way and methods of giving en masse Realization.

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I felt, I am lost. I am no more. Its only the grace that is there.

about it because they will crucify you he was rather worried that people wouldnt understand or you may write another Bible or Gita no use. First of all, you must give them Realization. If they get their Realization, then they will realize that theres something about it, about this human awareness.... He always used to give an analogy. Supposing you are born on the tenth storey and everybodys on the ground. You must at least make them climb two storeys so they know theres something above. Otherwise, there is no use talking about it. And he said, This is the mistake between the saints and the incarnations. They never realized that these people are still on the ground. So that is what you have to be, very careful, that rst of all you must give Realization to them. So I was seeking the ways and methods, working it out inside Myself through My own style of meditation, in the sense that I would work out all the permutations and combinations. Supposing I met one person, then I would see what problems that person had, how you can overcome it like that. I would try to study that person internally. And I went to many people to nd out, but I found they were great hypocrites. I saw so many of these gurus. Most of them, when I saw them, I was surprised they were all hypocrites, money-making. Somehow or other, I said, I must open the last chakra. So the last chakra was opened and I saw the Kundalini, which is the primordial force within us, which is the Holy Ghost within us, rising, like a telescope opening out. And then I saw the whole thing open and a big torrential rain of bliss started owing through My head, all over. I felt, I am lost. I am no more. Its only the grace that is there. I saw it completely happening to Me. So in 1970 this happened, the 5th of May and just after that we had a very big lecture in a very big hall and thousands of people had come and I told them very frankly that these [false gurus] are all thugs and hypocrites, some of them are demonic, some are evil people. I took their names, everything. I told them, Dont go near them.... And there were so many others [to] whom I told these things very clearly and they got frightened. They said, You should not say like this. They will come and murder you. I said, Let them come and murder Me. But nobody did anything. Nobody even went to the courts. And thats how, you see, they tried to bring a bad name to Me. They paid money to the newspapers to publish things against Me because I said, You cannot pay money. So they thought that I was just trying to harm them by saying such a thing, that you cant earn money in the name of God. If its a job, you can do it. But Gods work is not a job. And the struggle started from the day I started giving Realization. And I started with one lady who got Realization rst. Then we got about twelve people who got Realization.

In two years, I gave only about fourteen people Realization. Then gradually, when fourteen people got Realization, then many others started getting Realization. But I started also curing people because that was helping a lot. Then My husband got elected to this post and we had to come to London. So when I came to London, we had one program. The Indians abroad are not so much interested in God. They are more interested in money. So none of the Indians stayed there. They all ran away and only the foreigners who were there. There were about seven hippies and so I had to work on them, seven hippies. For four years, I was working on them to give them the Realization. They were difcult. Their liver was bad, their head was off a terrible time. But in between, I used to go to India. And in India also the work was done. For three month always I would be away. So we started working in the villages especially, surprisingly, where My forefathers were once ruling in that area. There we started moving in a very big way. Some people came from Australia to India, like that, and the work started moving in those directions. Then gradually, the work improved and people found that this is the way we can transform ourselves. Many people were taking drugs or were alcoholic or they were mad people or cancer people. They felt better and they got cured. And it was established that Sahaja Yoga is something very important.

It was established that Sahaja Yoga is something very important.

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When I am with myself, I am never lonely at all. I enjoy myself

We have to understand that life has to be enjoyable. Life should be a blessing. Its not to be a misery. We create our own miseries by these false ideas, by our own conictions we have in our mind, mental projections we have in our mind or our own obstinacy, whatever it is. All these things can be cured if you take to Sahaja Yoga because you become a balanced person, level-headed, wise person and you become a witness. The whole thing becomes like a show, like a drama and you become fearless. You start seeing the whole thing like a drama. And this is what a human being has to achieve. We talk of peace. We talk of no war. We talk of many things like this, you see atomic bomb, this and that. All that is not going to work out. Only what is going to work out is the transformation of human beings. If the human beings are transformed, things will work out absolutely rst class. Not only that, but that they will enjoy the bliss of life. We are missing the point altogether. This is a very important thing, that human beings must say one thing: What have we achieved out of all this? Just for a minute to stop and think. I was born in a Christian family deliberately because, you see, I personally think that Protestants are the greatest fanatics. They are very sophisticated. You see, their fanaticism is in their brain. Nobody can make them out that theyre fanatics, that they are great fanatics, the greatest of all. But My parents were very enlightened people. They understood Christ very well. First time I took the Bible in the hand, I asked My father, Who is this Paul? He said, Its an intruder. Forget it. Dont believe him at all. So you see, they understood all these things very well because My father was a realized soul like Khalil Gibran. If you read Khalil Gibran, he says the same thing about Paul, the same thing. If you are an enlightened person, you see the essence of everything. Whatever religion you are born into, you dont ignore any other religion. You try to learn about other religions and then you nd the essence is the same in every religion. What is there to ght? And thats how you belong to no religion. You belong to every religion. Thats what happened. But My parents were very enlightened people, I must say, and I was very lucky to choose them as My parents.... I was like a mother to [the other children] from My very childhood. When My father and mother went to jail, I was about ... ve and a half years of age, so I had all the keys of the house in My little frock and I used to carry all the duties like the grandmother. I never felt lost. My life is on the whole is very collective. By temperament, I am extremely collective. I can live anywhere. I can sleep anywhere. I can live in the jungles. I have no problems in that. I am extremely collective. I am not exclusive by temperament. From very childhood, I was very friendly with all the people in that area where we were living and My mother was known as Nirmalas mother. My father was known as Nirmalas father. So they said, We have lost our identity because of her. So I was a very friendly person. I never felt lonely and when I am with Myself, I am never lonely at all. I enjoy Myself very much.

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THIS WAS TO BE THE FIRST time in Shri Matajis presence and I was looking forward to the India tour of 1990-1991 immensely. We were met in Bombay and were taken by bus up to Pune, far up in the hills where Shri Mataji had bought some land. We were to camp there on a high hill overlooking a valley and it was really lovely. We caught all the breezes and had this wonderful view. Later that day, we were to meet Shri Mataji. It had been arranged for Her to arrive in a Jeep, all decorated in owers and banana leaves by the local villagers. Among many others, I was with Elizabeth, who was also from South Africa, and Patricia, who was from New Zealand, and we were all lining ourselves along the sides of the country road below the hill, waiting for the Jeep to arrive. Anticipation was in the air. We could hear the drums being beaten and the school children danced around the Jeep as it slowly wound its way along the road toward us. Love owed along that road and I was holding out my hands towards Shri Mataji, hoping to feel the cool breeze owing. As the Jeep drew nearer, I was surprised to feel the cool breeze, not only on my hands, but on my feet as well. Shri Mataji looked so cool and loving, smiling so beautifully for Her children. The Jeep passed us and continued on the road, turning onto a smaller track to wind its way slowly up the hill. As the Jeep drove up this hill, the track zig-zagged and we started to follow behind it, but we did not have to follow the track, instead we could make a straight line up the hill and therefore see Shri Mataji at every bend in the road. But then something unusual happened. Elizabeth, Patricia and I all had this tremendous feeling of dj-vu, like it was the Sermon on the Mount and we were all climbing the Mount to listen to Lord Jesus. It was just like that, with all the yogis and yoginis in their saris and kurtas walking up this hill in small groups, here and there, with the local villagers mixing with us and following our Holy Mother as well. Margaret Fry

THERE WAS A VILLAGE we visited on the India tour in 1980-81. These pictures where the light is coming down in a shaft on Shri Mataji were taken there. I was sitting next to Cheryl Bradshaw, who took the pictures, so I can vouch for the fact that it was completely open, no cover. It was an overcast day. There was no sunlight. Cheryl actually took seven pictures. I took some of the pictures to London and showed them to Shri Mataji. I said, These amazing pictures have come out, Mother. I said, Theres another picture, Mother, in the series, in the negatives. Its the last one and You have Your hand up over Your head like Youre saying, Its enough now. And She laughed. I found out afterwards that She said this light was because a saint was buried in that village and he was pouring grace down upon Her. I remember now that afterwards, after the talk, She asked us to go down to where he was buried and walk around his tomb clockwise. Kay McHugh On the 14th of 1982, Shri Mataji told us about the nature of the camera and this special series of photographs: There are so many things the camera has caught, which human beings cannot catch. Like one day, I was sitting in a village, giving a lecture, in a place where a realized soul had died, a great realized soul.... I can feel it, but you people do not see it with your eyes. A great ood of light was falling on My head, a ood of light. And the camera caught it.... The camera caught it six times. And the seventh time, I just did like this and it stopped. The camera is so sensitive and so honest and so deep. It could be a person loves you very much that even a photograph of Hers can love you so much.... We cannot think of someone who is just love. And the photograph has that love within itself. None of the people before Me were photographed. Christ was never photographed. Buddha was not photographed. Even Muhammed was not photographed. This is the rst time you have developed this wonderful thing called camera. And theres My photograph. What to do?

THE DIVINE COOL BREEZE

PHOTOGRAPH CAPTIONS, CREDITS AND OTHER NOTES Front cover: Her Holiness Shri Mataji Nirmala Devi Contents pages quote: Shri Mataji Nirmala Devi, Hamsa Puja 1991 (Before typing you just say namaskar to that work that you have to do, just like that. And then you start doing the work as if you are not doing it. You are just doing it typing. You are just typing, thats all. Youre not doing it. Youre not doing anything. Some people say, Mother, you travel so much. I never travel. Im sitting or Im walking. Where do I travel? It is the plane that travels. Im just sitting in the plane. I never travel like a Superman. I am sitting very nicely. Where do I travel? If I start thinking, I travel very much, I do this work, I do that work, somebody would say, Mother, you do so much work. I mean I dont do anything. I tell you, really, I dont do anything.) Contents pages photograph: Shri Mataji departs Vienna, 7 September 1984 (Gregoire de Kalbermatten) Page 2: Shri Matajis Feet, Shri Adi Shakti Puja, 19 June 2005 (Alexey Cherepanov) Page 4: Shri Mataji Nirmala Devi, Shri Adi Shakti Puja 2001 (Michael Markl) Page 6 and 7: Genova, Italy Page 8 and 9: Shri Matajis house in Genova, Italy Page 10-11, 13 and 15: Shri Mataji Nirmala Devi Page 16: watercolour painting of a ute (Shreya Payment) Page 17: a dog on the stage, Guru Puja weekend 1995 (Michael Markl) Page 18, 20-1, 23, 25, 29 and 31: Shri Mataji Nirmala Devi Page 32 and above: Shri Mataji Nirmala Devi, India tour circa 1990 (Cheryl Bradshaw) Back cover quote: Shri Mataji Nirmala Devi, from an undated letter translated from Marathi (We are Sahaja Yogis. God has chosen us. How can we work if we remain weak? Shri Adi Shakti has given us the power to redeem all of mankind. We can do it and we will do it. In your heart, you should pray, How deep is Gods love for us. He has given us Realization. He is the ocean of mercy. Ignoring all our mistakes, He is working hard day and night for our welfare and, instead of praying for His forgiveness of our mistakes, we are making complaints against Him and blaming Him. The following thoughts will please your hearts: O God, please give us the power of Your love. May I be the drop in the ocean of Your love, that is enveloping the whole universe, so that its loving pulsation is vibrated through my life and I remain engrossed in that bliss. May your life be ooded by the waves of divine love. Always loving you, much more than Myself. Your Mother, Nirmala)

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Your Mother

Nirmala