1. Stare at OEM Charts 2. If you hate GUI, stare at vmstat/iostat output. 3. Keep staring 1 or 2, till eyes become red.

Then implement next steps. 4. Blame Application Vendor or Application Code. 5. Mumble few of the Explain plan jargons such as semi-nested hash join is taking precedence over left join Cartesian nested loop or vice versa depending on the explain plan. 6. Rebuild Indexes. 7. Rebuild Tables. Drop tables. 8. Collect System Stats. 9. Run Table Statistics collection job. 10. Collect Dictionary Stats. 11. Flush Shared Pool. 12. Recycle application. 13. Recycle database. 14. Recycle Server. And that doesnt work Recycle Data-center. 15. Throw Space, example Increase temp space. 16. Blame Archiving. 17. Blame old Hardware, example Exadata Version 1. 18. Buy more memory 19. Tell the same story: It has something to do with Oracle release all the times. 20. Wait for Oracle patch release. 21. Call Oracle stupid one more time. 22. Suggest Code rewrite or change in application architecture. 23. Get Root password. 24. Type Resignation Letter.