Yo Ho!

By Nathan John Bartocci

(913)271-3037 njbartocci@gmail.com

EXT. NEIGHBORHOOD PARK - SUMMER DAY CASEY, a boy of 13, rides his bicycle by the park. He stops to observe two boys, PETER and PITT, 9, on a PLASTIC JUNGLE GYM dressed as pirates pretend theyre manning a ship. PETER Up that rigging, you monkeys! Aloft! Break out those sails and watch them fill with the wind thats carrying us to freedom! Pitt is struggling to attach a HAND-PAINTED PIRATE FLAG to the jungle gym. PITT Captain! We have a problem! PETER Aye! What is it me hardy? PITT I cant get the flag to stay straight. PETER No problem, Pitt! We just need to use more of our Super Sticky Pirate Rope! PITT I left the duct-tape at home. CUTAWAY: TO CASEY ON HIS BIKE PETER (OFF.) You forgot the duct-tape!? Casey scoffs at them and rides off. PITT (cont.) Well how was I supposed to know? You shoulda said somethin when we were at your Moms house earlier. ARABELLA (OFF.) Guys! Both boys jump out of their skins and run over to the edge of the deck to see ARABELLA, 6.

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2.

PITT Its just Arabella. PETER Avast ye scurvy landlubber! By what unfortunate winds do ye find yourself in these waters? Arabella looks at the ground ARABELLA Why are you guys talking like that? PETER But dont you know who we are? Arabella nods. The boys position themselves dramatically in front of their flag. PETER Our ship is the finest, she wont go under. We take what we want of Yer Booty and Plunder. PITT Aboard Paddys Lament weve conquered the sea. From Tortuga to England, saling fast far and free. The boys draw their WOODEN SWORDS PETER Pete Bailey the Scurge! PITT Cslico Pitt! and we are... PETER AND PITT Brothers of the Black Skull! ARABELLA Oh that sounds fun! Can I be a pirate too? Peter and Pitt look at eachother and start laughing. ARABELLA Hey! Whats so funny? PETER You cant be a pirate!

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3.

PITT Youre a girl! ARABELLA So? PETER So! Girls cant be pirates! ARABELLA Stupid! I bet Im a better pirate than you. The boys look at eachother laughing again. ARABELLA (CONT.) Pitt, if you dont let me play pirates with you Im telling Mom. The laughing stops PITT Thats not fair! ARABELLA I wanna play Pirates! PITT Fine, but you need to go get a sword and pirate clothes. ARABELLA Cool! Ill grab my stuff. Arabella leaves. FADE TO: INT. BEDROOM - DAY Casey paces with his two friends, Diego and Charley, 13, sitting on the ground playing Dungeons and Dragons. CASEY Its like that stupid kid thinks he owns the Playground. DIEGO Yeah.

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4.

CASEY Pretending to be pirates? Thats so childish! MOM (OFF.) Casey can you come downstairs really quick? CHARLEY (not paying attention) Ill use my mage to summon a Snow-Ork... CASEY You know what I say? I say we take it back. DIEGO Take it back? CASEY Yeah. I say we show them who really runs the jungle gym. MOM (OFF.) Casey Beverly Anthony, right this second! CASEY Jeez! Im coming Mom! He storms through the door while Diego and Charley keep their eyes fixed on the game. CHARLEY Beverly? FADE TO: EXT. NEIGHBORHOOD PARK - SUMMER DAY The three pirates are aboard the Jungle Gym. Peter at the wheel, Pitt looking at the map, Arabella looking through CARDBOARD TUBE like a telescope. PITT According to the map, Captain, if we sail twenty notches starboard well find that treasure!

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5.

ARABELLA I hope theres enough Gold to fill a whole room with! PITT Well live like Kings! PETER Like Pirate Kings! Through the telescope we see Casey, Diego, and Charlie riding up on bikes. ARABELLA Captain! She hands the telescope to Pete who looks through it. PETER I guess King James isnt ready for Pirate Kings afterall! The boys stop their bikes around fifteen feet away. CASEY (shouting) Peter Bailey! PETER Ahoy There my fish faced friend! What brings ye to these waters today? Fancy an early grave? CASEY Weve come to commondeer the Jungle Gym. DIEGO Prepare to be borded you dummys! The boys charge the fort holding sticks that they are pretending to be swords. PETER Arrrgh! Now we see if youve really earned the name Cut-Throat Arie! ARABELLA Paint the ship red with their blood!

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6.

The three older kids run up onto the jungle gym and the kids, pretending the sticks are their swords, begin fighting. Charley and Arabella, Diego and Pitt, Casey and Peter. Charley uses his stick as a magic wand. CHARLEY Sumonos Flama Extermina! ARABELLA Hey! What are you doing? CHARLEY Im a wizard! ARABELLA Yeah? Well I got a stick! She charges at him and they continue sword fighting. Pitt yells out in agony. He has a stick under his armpit. PITT Cruel fate! Ya got me you scurvy Dog! He pretends to die dramatically. Diego runs over to Pitt and Casey and the three begin dueling. Peter jumps onto a higher platform. PETER Whats the matter, aint got yer sea legs yet? Arabella climbs up onto the platform with Peter as they are surrounded. ARABELLA What do we do? PETER Abandon Ship! All three kids get up and run away. CASEY Thatll teach em. Im number one on this Jungle Gym! He smiles pleased with himself. Then it starts raining.