I realized, that isolating myself in my head.

Repeating quotes of people on the internet, or in my life saying negative things Youre stupid, and applying them to myself is a very bad idea. My reaction to the world is amazing, it has so many things to offer,: I dont want to see it. I knew there were out there, but there it wasnt worth having to go through all the bad stuff to get there. I used to think my depression was useful, that it gave me a third-person/ outside perspective into the real world, and because I was isolated and sad, I could think about real world problems more rationally. I realize that being inside my head, and squeezing my conscious through threats and grief, actually is a really small part of the world. A small, fraction, decimal of what I thought it was/actually is?