Jayel Kirby Sue Briggs English 2010 @ 10 May 1, 2014

The Pain of Education

English 2010 Reflection

I have often wondered why some courses are referred to as easy classes. I dont think they exist, nor do I believe that they ought to. As a student whose sole motivation is to learn something new, Ive come to believe that education doesnt come without some level of pain - or at least a vigorous dose of personal discomfort. I suppose it might be possible for someone to pass a class here and there without exerting an extensive level of energy, but would they have learned anything? While I would say that English is probably my favorite subject, it has been a far cry from being easy. I have found English 2010, as I did with English 1010, to be a somewhat painful class. And I say that with the utmost appreciation. My discomfort began on the second session of class, when my instructor, Sue Briggs, announced before the class that I had earned 100% on all of my papers in Eng. 1010. I had no one to blame but myself for the announcement - she had asked my permission to share something about me, and I had figured I had nothing to hide - but now I felt overwhelmed by the pressure to produce perfect papers throughout my time in Eng. 2010! It didnt take long to determine that I had to consider each assignment as if it were its own entity. I would wipe my mind clean of previous grades, focus on the task at hand, do the best I could, and hand it in,

reminding myself that I was in the process of learning (and therefore expected to make a few mistakes). Following this regimen kept me from driving myself completely insane. Another hardship was in choosing topics. From the start, we were told to choose an umbrella topic that we could stick with throughout the semester. All of our major papers would belong under that umbrella. Are you kidding me? Im the queen of burn-out. Oh, how I agonized! At last, I chose what motivates people to overcome addictions. Off of that theme, I wrote a profile on my daughters experiences with an addiction to self-harm. From there, it seemed logical to review the book The Power of Habit by Charles Duhigg, a self-help book that discussed how to overcome habits. But things werent so logical after that. In preparation for my position/proposal paper, I spent hour after hour combing SLCCs databases for clues as to what motivated people to overcome their destructive behaviors. There was so little with that specific slant. And to be honest, I was finding myself bored reading about addiction. At last, I reviewed my profile paper and realized that I was much more intrigued with the specific subject of selfharm. So, I made a slight revision on my original theme. And it worked. The most aggravating experience I had in this class was also the one that was the most fun: using multimedia. The first writing assignment was to summarize/critique text pages 321327 and Design Matters, by Jon Scieszka. Both pieces were about using multimedia, but contrasted in the way that they presented the information. I took what I considered a rhetorical risk. I wrote a boring, to-the-point informative summary about the text. Then I wrote a critique on Scieszkas work, using a variety of colors and fonts, showing a lot, yet saying very little. That assignment was the fun. The painful part came when I was working on my position/proposal paper in March and April. I didnt have much experience with using photo captions, so I was chagrinned when I attempted to edit my work in Microsoft Word and found that captions didnt

follow the photos when I moved them around in the text. I became frustrated and tossed them into the margins while I finished my editing, only to learn later that I couldnt access them to move or delete them. Googling the issue got me nowhere. Talk about frustration! Not every assignment was fraught with malady; some provided me with cures. For instance, it was helpful to receive feedback on my position/proposal paper from my peer reviewer, Alec Bailey. He was able to recognize the need to condense my introduction and he suggested that I do more to explain the self-help art exhibit that I had mentioned. He even had the idea of sharing works from such an exhibit online. Although I didnt make that addition in my succeeding copy, I did insert it in my final one. I think that was a sound rhetorical decision, helping readers to visualize the exhibit and supplying the element of pathos I was looking for. In addition to peer review assistance, I found our textbook to be beneficial in providing guidelines for proper citation of a variety of special cases. Such sources of ideas and information helped me feel more confident about my final draft. Still, there was more discomfort to be had. I was a bit concerned when we were assigned to read the section in our text called: Drafting, Revising, and Editing (321-327) on February 4th. I usually tend to edit as I go along. I write down my thoughts on the subject, referring to the dictionary and thesaurus during the process. I do tend to let it rest and then go back again to reread and edit, but I would do all of this before submitting it for peer review. Consequently, there was little to change between peer review and final copy. I worried - would I be docked points for having a presentable manuscript the first time around? I became more concerned about revising on March 27th, when Mrs. Briggs shared with the class a writing strategy by author Veronica Roth. It said that Roth would begin her writing with word vomit. After letting it sit, she would reread and make notes. Then, she would - get

this! - Rip it to shreds! This, of course, led to the need to start writing again. Make notes? Rip to shreds? She had to be kidding! As much as the principles of this procedure led me to shudder, I had to admit that they had merit. During the production of my final paper, my mind came back to them again and again, like my mothers voice ringing in my head whenever I consider doing something I know I shouldnt because everyone else is doing it. The echo of Roths formula gave me the courage to spew words onto the page without caring whether they were appropriately named or placed. It kept me company during the long spells during which we let our papers sit unfinished and turned our attention to multimodal group presentations. Her principles treated my wounds when I haphazardly scrambled portions of my text, and barbarically chopped entire paragraphs from my final work (ouch!). Looking back, I think that listening to those promptings was the smartest thing I did. It all comes down to the principle Ive been taught my whole life: Be grateful for your trials; they make you stronger. Of course, thereve been days that I responded to that with: No thanks. Id much rather live a trouble-free life and remain weak. But thats not why I came back to school. Im here to see and feel and do. I need to struggle, stretch myself, and make mistakes. I want to improve upon the varied experiences Ive already had in life as a daughter, sibling, wife, mother, and grandmother. Its been great, but I want more. I may not find emotional relief by physically vandalizing my body like those who self-harm, but Ive come to realize that discomfort can lead to good things. Im not going to run away from a little work; Im here to learn. Even if it hurts.