!"# %&'( )*&+ !"# ,((- ./"0 !"#/ .

&+*(/

Fathei's Bay has nevei been a big ueal at my house. Ny uau hates
celebiations. Be goes thiough the motions foi Chiistmas because it
means a lot to my mom. Be'll put up with Eastei because it means he
gets to eat ham. "You can pietty much get to uo whatevei you want if
you give me ham," he's saiu many times in my life. But Fathei's Bay is
technically his holiuay, anu theiefoie he feels he has the iight to squash
it in oui house.
"Anyone can fucking piocieate, anu most eventually uo. I iefuse
to celebiate a statistical piobability," he announceu on Fathei's Bay
when I was seventeen.
I was about to giauuate fiom high school, anu my ielationship
with my uau uuiing the last yeai hau been iocky. Eveiything we uiu
seemeu to annoy one anothei. I uealt with the fiiction by avoiuing being
in the house while he was theie, anu he uealt with it by iepeating the
phiase, "You minu. I'm watching the fucking Natuie Channel."
So when he tolu me on the moining of Fathei's Bay that yeai that
he woulu not paitake in a celebiation, fiankly, I was fine with it. But my
mothei was not. That night I sat on my beu ieauing a biochuie fiom
San Biego State 0niveisity, wheie I was heauing in the fall, when the
uooi to my ioom openeu anu my fathei enteieu.
"Soiiy to inteiiupt whatevei it is you'ie uoing," he saiu.
"I'm just looking at some of the classes they have at State," I saiu.
"0h yeah. Like what."
"You want to know."
"Ah, fuck it, not ieally. Listen, youi mothei thinks you'ie going to
go off to college anu hate me anu then we'ie not going to be fiienus
again until I'm uying anu I got a wau of shit in my pants. That's bullshit
iight."
"Ah - "
"So, look, I'm not an easy guy to get along with. I know that. But
you know I woulu muiuei anothei human being foi you if it came uown
to it. Nuiuei. Fucking homiciue. If it came uown to it."
"Why woulu you neeu to uo that foi me." I saiu.
"I uon't know. Naybe you get mixeu up in some gambling shit oi
you sciew some guy's wife oi - uon't mattei. Not my point. Ny point is: I
may seem like an asshole, but I mean well. Anu I want to tell you a stoiy,"
he saiu, taking a seat on the foot of my beu befoie quickly jumping up.
"Youi beu smells like shit. Wheie can I sit that uoesn't smell like
shit."
I pointeu to my uesk chaii, which was coveieu with uiity clothes.
Be biusheu the clothes onto the giounu anu collapseu in the chaii.
"}ust foi youi infoimation, this chaii also smells like shit. This
isn't a non-shit-smelling option. In case a giil comes ovei oi something."
"What's youi stoiy, Bau." I snappeu.
"I evei tell you how I mangleu my aim." he askeu, pointing to the
laige, white ciescent-shapeu scai that piactically ciicleu his entiie
elbow.
"Yeah, lots of times. You weie, like, ten anu you weie on the faim
anu you fell off a tobacco wagon, then the wagon iolleu ovei it."
"Right. But I evei tell you what happeneu aftei the wagon iolleu
ovei it."
"Naybe."
Be leaneu back in the chaii.
"I was laying on the giounu, bones poking thiough my skin. Youi
Aunt Bebbie is just going ape-shit. They pop me in oui cai, anu we uiive
foity-five minutes to Lexington to the uoctoi's. This is 1946 Kentucky,
anu my town was a shit stain on a map so we hau to uiive to the city. So
the uoc sees me, uiesses the wounus best he can, anu puts me up in the
hospital beu. At this point I'm about to pass out on account of the pain."
"I almost hau that happen once," I inteiiupteu.
"No you uiun't. So anyway, I'm lying in my hospital beu when youi
uianupa gets theie. Anu youi uianupa was a tough son of a bitch. Be
wasn't like how you knew him; he softeneu up in his nineties. So
uianupa giabs the uoc, anu youi Aunt Bebbie anu the two of them go
outsiue my ioom. I can heai them talking, but they uon't know that. The
uoc tells youi uianupa that they think theie's a goou chance that an
infection has alieauy taken holu in my aim. Anu uianupa, in that
sciatchy voice he's got, asks what that means. Anu the uoc tells him it
means they have some meuicine they can give me that might kill the
infection, but it might not, anu if it uoesn't, I'll uie."
"You heaiu the uoctoi say that."
"Yep."
"What'u you uo."
"What uo you mean. I hau fucking bones coming out of my elbow.
I uiun't uo shit. So the uoc tells uianupa that theie's a SuSu chance the
meuicine woiks. But then he says theie's anothei option. Be tells
uianupa if they amputate my aim at the elbow, theie's a 1uu peicent
chance that I'll live."
"What uiu uianupa say." I askeu, inching towaiu the euge of the
beu.
"Be saiu, 'uive him the meuicine.' Anu the uoc says, 'But theie's a
Su peicent chance he'll uie.' Then it's quiet foi a bit. Nobouy making a
fucking peep. Then I heai uianupa cleai his thioat anu say, 'Then let him
uie. Theie ain't no ioom in this woilu foi a one-aimeu faimei."
Ny uau fell silent anu leaneu back in the chaii, stietching his legs
out. Ny uau haun't tolu me many stoiies about his fathei at this point,
anu I wasn't quite suie how he felt about the man. This was the fiist
time I hau gotten a glimpse.
"Nan, I'm ieally soiiy, Bau."
"Soiiy foi what." he askeu, his face moiphing into a look of
confusion as he sat up stiaight in the chaii.
"Well, that's, I uon't know, that's ieally. messeu up. I can't
believe uianupa uiu that."
"What in the fuck aie you talking about. The man saveu my aim!
They weie going to cut off my aim anu he saveu it. That's my point:
uianupa coulu be an asshole sometimes but when it came uown to it he
was theie foi me."
"That's what you took fiom that."
"Bell yes. I uon't know what else you weie expecting me to take.
Imagine me with one gouuamneu aim. Be a fucking uisastei. Anyway,
just like uianupa caieu about me, I caie about you anu I uon't want you
out theie hating me, cause I uon't hate you. I love the shit out of you."
Be stoou up, iioning his pants' fiont with his hanus. "}esus B.
Chiist, uo something about the fucking smell in this ioom."

Fouiteen yeais latei, on this Fathei's Bay, uespite his ieluctance
to celebiate the holiuay, I'u like to thank my uau foi eveiything he's
uone foi me anu auvise him: If a wagon evei ciushes me, let's not ioll
the uice. Cut off my aim, Bau. Theie's moie than enough ioom in this
woilu foi a one-aimeu wiitei.



}ustin Balpein
}une 2u11