Porscha March

Professor Lagos
Experiences in Literature
1 May 2014
What makes a Good Love Story?
There is no true definition of Love. Love is a very broad and universal term that no man
has ever been able to define completely. There are several ways of expressing love no matter
how conventional or unconventional they may seem. In the short story What We Talk about
When We Talk about Love by Raymond Carver, two lovers Terri and Mel bicker on what true
love is. Both characters make valid points as to what they believe love is, despite Terris
turbulent past relationship with her ex Ed. I believe a good love story consists of two people who
are equally afraid of getting hurt but are willing to give the relationship a chance and grow with
one another. There are several ways of expressing love no matter how conventional or
unconventional they may seem. In the short story What We Talk About When We Talk About
Love by Raymond Carver, two lovers, Mel and Terri bicker on what true love is. Both
characters make valid points as to what they believe love is, despite Terris turbulent past
relationship with her ex Ed. I believe a good love story consists of two people who are equally
afraid of getting hurt, but willing to give the relationship a chance in order to grow with one
another.
What makes a good love story? I believe a good love story focuses on consistency,
intentions, trust, how you express your love, pushing each other to do their best, and must
importantly, mental growth. Consistency is probably the biggest factor when talking about love
because it shows each person that they still care and are trying. Is each person consistent in
expressing their love for one another? Are they trying to be a better person for the sake of
themselves and their partner as well? The list goes on, but the most important reasoning for why
this short story is a good love story is because Ed was consistent in loving Terri. Ed was abusive
towards Terri, He beat me up one night. He dragged me around the living room by my ankles.
He kept saying I love you bitch (Carver 333). Mel argued that this was not true love, but why
wasnt it? People in general have so much criteria and standards for how love should be that they
subconsciously push away and deter anything that seems out of the ordinary in comparison to
their own beliefs. Hence, the reason why Mel throughout the story would consistently bash Terri
for being with a man that was abusive. Mel failed to realize that his own beliefs about how love
should be expressed were not the only way of expressing it.
This relationship wasnt the conventional type of relationship. Yes, Ed beat Terri and
even harassed her after they had broken up but it was because he did not have anyone else. In a
way, Eds intentions were pure; he did not want to lose Terri because she was simply the only
person he had. She was the only person to stick by his side despite his flaws and he loved her for
that. He allowed his passion for her to get in the way however, once he became abusive, but the
underlying reason for it was out of love. Some may not understand this notion, but the reality
is how we choose to express our love is analogous to what we feel subconsciously. Although Ed
loved Terri, his way of expressing it was not exactly healthy; however, it shows that Terri was
interested in sticking by him to possibly show him how to express love in a healthy way.
Mel also argues; What do any of us really know about love?It seems to me were just
beginners at love (Carver 333). In other words, who really knows that love is, let alone how to
express it. Some would say that true love is when your partner is willing to die for you. Ed killed
himself eventually because he loved her so much. It was love, Terri said. He was willing to die
for it. He did die for it (Carver 333). Eds consistency all the way up until after he killed himself
is the reason I believed this was a good love story. Time to open our eyes to new ways of
expressing love, not saying abuse is okay but because no two people on this earth are exactly the
same, our ways of expressing love will always be different amongst one another.