HOW TO BE A GOOD TRANS ALLY

presented by Pride Alliance

Dont ask about birth names.

Always use their preferred name if theyve asked you to.

Its none of your business - their preferred name IS their real name.
Whatever is on their FredCard is irrelevant - you wouldnt ask a cisgender person to see
the name on their card.
It is so hard to use that name! Ive known them as __ for so long! Just stop.

Use correct pronouns.

If you dont know someones pronouns,

just ask!
If you dont understand the way to use a
pronoun, educate yourself.

Apologize when you mess up.

If you use the wrong name or pronouns, just apologize and correct it for the next time.

Dont fight with them about whether what you said was offensive.

Dont expect them to educate you.

Books exist.
The internet exists.
Some trans people are happy to explain things, but some arent.

Dont ask about their genitals.

When you do so, it sounds like youre questioning their validity. Their identity is what they
say it is, regardless of whats in their pants.
Not all trans people want hormones or gender reassignment surgery or any surgery at all.
But, how do you have sex? No.
If they feel like telling you personal information about their bodies, that is between you
and them. Its their choice to do so.

They dont have to pass to be legitimate.

Whether or not you believe they look like

their target gender is irrelevant.
Passing is a privilege that some trans
people dont have, whether thats
attributed to their genetics, their financial
situation, or any other number of factors.
You dont get to decide whether someone
is trans enough or man enough or
woman enough.

Dont assume theyre straight.

Gender and sexual/romantic orientation are separate entities.

There are trans people who are straight, gay, bi, pan, ace, etc. Their sexual or romantic
orientations are as diverse as the cisgender community.

Non binary trans people are real, too.

Trans people dont always identify

within the male/female binary.
They may use gender neutral
pronouns or they may not.
They can express their gender, like
any other trans person, however
they want.