Logan Kahler

Clouds filled the sky as a light-tan-skinned teenagers eyes brimmed with tears. She clutched a
white piece of plastic and waited. Two red lines appeared, triggering waterfalls to flow from her eyes.
Countless thoughts permeated her mind.
My life is over. What is my mom going to say? How will I ever raise it? Genesis Aguilar said the
moment she discovered she was pregnant at age 13.
The oldest of four children, Aguilar recalled her childhood being the most difficult time of her life. The
hot summers in Santa Ana and the cold winters in Mason City still resonate today. The temperature was
trivial compared with the upbringing she experienced as a young Latina in America.
Born to two immigrant parents, a Mexican father and a Salvadoran mother, she faced emotional
hardship growing up.
It wasnt necessarily the fact that we didnt have money. Its that we didnt have a dad, Aguilar
muttered, with tears in her eyes.
She remembered a green gym bag, with
a broken zipper resting on an old oak
entertainment center. Stained buttonup shirts, ripped Wrangler carpenter
jeans and an assortment of tools and
brushes were stuffed inside.
A dark-skinned man with a receding
hairline mumbled words in Spanish and
grasped the shoulder strap of the old
bag as he slowly walked out of the
bedroom, down the hall of the
apartment and out of her life. Threeyear-old, fear-stricken Aguilar gripped
her Tasmanian devil stuffed animal tight
as her father gave her one more look
before he disappeared and was never
heard from again.

Geovanni sits on Genesis knee in the living room of

their apartment.

Aguilar claimed the last words she remembers her father saying to her came after he was in a fight with
her mother. He told her, Lo siento which in English translates to, I am sorry, before he stormed out
of the apartment, the day before he left for good.
Sometimes I wondered what life would have been like with him, but I think we were better off without
him, she said.
Many years passed, and homes and friends changed while her immigrant mother struggled to find and
keep a job to support her growing family. After working temporary, under-the-counter-paying jobs, she

was forced to pack up her family and relocate to find employment. After leaving Santa Ana, her family
lived in Austin, Texas, with her grandmother, then in Des Moines, Iowa, in the garage of a family friend.
The walls leaked insulation and filled the empty garage with a foul odor. She recalled one humid evening
when her mother brought home food from the restaurant where she worked for Aguilar and her brother
and sisters. Black take-out boxes filled with old pizza and cold fried chicken always brought joy to the
young, starving children. After eating, they would go to sleep, but they would be awakened by the
sound of rats scurrying across the garage floor, searching for scraps of food.
By the time Aguilar was 12, she had gotten a paper route. With the money she made, she was able to
purchase groceries for her family. While she shopped at the grocery store, she struggled to reach items
on the higher shelves.
One day a boy from school who towered over her helped her get ketchup from the top shelf. She never
expected this boy to help her, since he came from a rich family and different social group.
The boy looked at her and said, I got it, and with a big smile on his face said, Whats your name?
Shaking in her steel-toed boots that had belonged to her father, she told him her name and thanked
him.
The boy said his father owned the movie theater in town and asked if she would like to go see the
showing of Austin Powers that night.
A mixture of anxiety and joy flushed through her body as she agreed to the offer. She never expected
this boy would change her life forever.
After the movie, the couple went back to his home, but she didnt know his parents were out of the
state. He looked at her and kissed her on the lips telling her, I love you and started to undo her
clothing.
Three weeks later, Aguilar became worried she might be pregnant. She remembered going to Walgreens
and stealing a pregnancy test out of embarrassment, returning home and finding out the test came up
positive.
After making the discovery, she approached the boy at school to tell him, but he denied ever doing
anything with her. Instead, the boy spread rumors about her, telling his friends he wasnt the only boy
she had been intimate with.
Throughout middle school, Aguilar was teased and harassed by her peers for being pregnant.
They would say really hurtful things but never took into consideration how I felt. I thought after middle
school, everything would be OK, but it got worse, she said. In high school, the comments were
terrible. I cried every time there was a dance. I mean, who wanted to go to a dance with a teenage
mom?
She remembered an evening after she got out of class, walking to her car and finding the air had been
let out of her tires.
Someone wrote swear words on the windows of my car and stole things from my center console, she
said. I got inside my car to find the title and insurance had been ripped up.

Just when she thought things couldnt get any worse, in late December of her senior year of high school,
two Child Protective Services officials showed up at her familys apartment. They told her the living
situation she was in was unfit for a child of her son, Geovannis, age. They told her she had a week to
turn over her parental rights to her child.
Afraid she would lose her son, she picked up extra shifts at her job at the town Pizza Hut. She had to skip
class and work on Christmas, but her paycheck wasnt going to be issued for nine days. She let her son
live with her cousin for a week while she collected enough money to put a deposit on an apartment.
I wasnt going to give Geo up for anything. I would go without eating, if it meant that he could, Aguilar
said.
One week later, she was able to pool money with her mother and put a deposit down on an apartment
and inform the CPS she was in a different residence.
In the spring of 2012, Aguilar received two letters. The first was from Iowa State University awarding her
acceptance into the school. The second was an anonymous letter saying a benefactor had been
watching her grow up and wanted to help her with her finances to support her son.
I thought I was going to pass out, she said. I cried for hours with Geo in my arms, telling him that its
going to be all right.
After the roller coaster of a life she has had so far, Aguilar has custody of her son, Geovanni, and is
attending Iowa State, studying graphic design and intends to become a graphic design artist for a
magazine publisher once she graduates.