To: Ms.

Diaz
From: Timothy Cutlip
Date: 3/5/15
Subject: MWA 2 Cover Letter
Rhetorical Situation
There is a large amount of human suffering in the world, and a large percentage of that can be
traced to genetic sources. Genetic engineering has the potential to eliminate many, if not all,
diseases from the population. Presented are several arguments in favor of developing and
applying genetic engineering: the amazing potential to alleviate human suffering in the world,
the accuracy and effectiveness of the science, as well as recognizing that it is the choice of the
individual or family. Also presented are acknowledgements and the rebuttal of several opposing
points: the possible side effects of genetic engineering, the expensive cost, and objections be they
religious or personal.
Areas of Interest
Sections to pay attention to are the comparison between the positives and negatives of genetic
engineering. Take time to contemplate the effects and consider the amazing potential genetic
engineering has to relieve so much of the suffering many individuals, families, and communities
experience due to diseases that can be fixed and eliminated.
SLO Progression
D. improve your fluency in the dialect of Standardized Written American English at the
level of the sentence, paragraph, and document

I improved upon my abilities within this SLO by returning to my work after time has passed, and
after my peers have evaluated it, so that I could further refine my writing from paragraph
structure to the way I set up my sentences.

Comment [SD1]: Specific examples?

H. integrate others positions and perspectives into your writing ethically, appropriately,
and effectively in various mediums and technologies
I improved upon my abilities within this SLO by listening to my peers thoughts and concerns
when reviewing my paper. I incorporated several suggestions and checked to make sure I was
doing so without being offensive or overlooking important details.

Comment [SD2]: Specific examples?

I. compose a research-based academic argument in one of various mediums and

technologies by identifying, analyzing, evaluating, and synthesizing sources, which must
include secondary sources
I improved upon my abilities within this SLO by taking time to go to the University Library and
explore possible sources as well as conduct vigorous research into the scientific field in which I
was composing an argument.

Comment [SD3]: Your cover letter is

informative, but lacks some specific examples
in your SLO discussion.

Timothy Cutlip
English 120 Tu/Th 8:00-9:15
March 5th, 2015
Is Genetics for Heretics?

Comment [SD4]: Great title!

What once a thing of science fiction is now becoming a reality with todays advances in
technology genetic engineering. Genetic engineering is ultimately beneficial for humankinds
well being as it can be studied, controlled, and used to effectively eliminate harmful diseases and
illnesses in the population. As with most science, there are a lot of factors involved in the process
making it a very complex field.

Comment [SD5]: Very concise thesisto

the point!

There is no denying that science is not perfect. By its very nature, science is a trial and
error until perfection, or as close as possible, is achieved. Science involves taking risks, making
guesses, and testing to see what holds true and what falls short. Through these processes we can
find near solutions to countless matters; new medicines, new surgical procedures, new
treatments. Genetic engineering is a science, and as any science it has its downsides. Within
science there can be critical failures which can occur even after countless numbers of successful
outcomes. Sometimes side effects are unpredictable and uncontrollable. A study was conducted
in the UK where questions regarding genetic engineering were asked of a study group and their
responses were recorded. Taken from the results of the study where the thoughts on application
of genetic engineering: Variables loading heavily on this component were, on the negative
attitude pole, personal objections, immoral, unnatural, unethical, harmful, personal
worry, negative welfare effects, dangerous, risky, tampering with nature, and creation of
inequalities (Frewer 18) These key words are just a few of the prominent concerns the

Comment [SD6]: :

general public in the UK had about genetic engineering, and they are not alone; there are many
who feel this way.
Genetic engineering tampers with the natural way of life because it alters the traits we
were given at birth. People manipulate their hair color, but going as far as to change the actual
pigments in the eyes is what is being considered here. These drastic levels of alteration disrupt
the natural way of living they alter the way we were destined to live our lives, and thats
wrong. This argument is believed by many people today, and the vast majority of them have
religious faith. This is because changing the way our bodies function from the day we were born,
on such a core level as genetics, is changing ones destiny. It is believed to be playing God,
because these attributes were determined for us, and not meant for us to manipulate them
ourselves. This doesnt fit into the plan that most people think of when considering that every
individual was born with a certain disposition to a very specific destiny.
Weve all seen the commercials, the fine print, and the terrible stories of bizarre and
potentially deadly side effects from medicines and procedures. Simple medicines have possible
side effects ranging from mild headache, to swollen lips, and even death. These side effects are
far from the intended outcome these things can happen with goals as simple as what allergy
medicines seek to provide. The possible side effects from tampering with our genetics could be
as bad as the most severe side effects found with these medicines. There are certain things that
cannot be controlled; no matter how many times there is success, there may always be that small
chance of failure. Living organisms change and adapt in unpredictable ways, and there is no way
to tell the long term side effects of tampering with the gene pool. Essentially, playing God, as
referred to previously, can have severe and extremely damaging side effects. Genetic

modification is a relatively new field, and we do not yet have sufficient evidence to show what
could happen 10 years from now or after even longer periods of time into the future.
One of the current issues preventing many suffering individuals and families from
receiving the care they need, whether the source of the suffering be a disease, injury, or anything
else requiring medical attention, is money. Most of the seriously needed cures require a large

Comment [SD7]: As the 21 century poet

Troy Ave says: its all about the money.
th

amount of money which many families are not able to give or are unwilling to sacrifice their
financial stability and instead choose to make the most of what they do have access to. Genetic
engineering will be one of those expensive procedures, especially as it is a relatively new
concept. It will not be available to the majority of the public and will likely be exclusive to those
important enough or wealthy enough to purchase. This could create social diversity and
unequal treatment between those who have been genetically modified and those who have not.
As quoted from the UK study group, creation of inequalities (Frewer 18) is a public concern.
There are many science fiction books and movies expanding upon that idea and it is not a great
possibility.
We live in a vast world of choice. Ultimately, the way each of us live our lives is
completely up to the individual. As more advanced technology is discovered as the human race
furthers itself along the evolutionary path more opportunities for different ways of life emerge.
As we develop the capability to genetic modify our bodies, we unlock a vast amount of positive
potential. By being able to alter our genetic makeup we can eliminate many genetic diseases and
illness from, theoretically, the entire human race. We may be able to extend our lifetime. We
may have the capability to relieve human suffering not just for those affected by a genetic
disease or illness, but also for those around them.

Comment [SD8]: Such as?

When performing scientific procedures, it is preferred to have things be predictable,

controllable, and planned. This is so negative outcomes can be prevented. Genetic engineering is
a process that can be studied in great detail, so as to have a full understanding of the process and
how it can be controlled through deliberate and planned methods. It is completely illogical to
think that there would be a zero percent chance of any problems occurring, but the chance is so
vastly lower than other sciences because this is one that can be tested rigorously and since it only
targets a specific gene, the chances of affecting other genetic traits is non-existent. It is a very
accurate field of work - it works by targeting specific genes that have defects. There is no
guessing with what you will affect; it can be very deliberate targeting, which eliminates a lot of
the negative possibilities that can occur with other more unpredictable sciences.

Comment [SD9]: The first part of the

sentence doesnt make sense when
considering the fact that youre claiming that
it will be deliberate and less likely to be
rampantly impacting genes.

With the specific targeting of genes, we know exactly what we are working to fix or
prevent. Genetic engineering can potentially eliminate diseases by preventing them from ever
developing, because the gene(s) with a defect can be altered to function correctly. This would
relieve millions of peoples pain and discomfort. It would change peoples entire lives for the
better. Imagine a world where no genetic disease exists; there would be no Downs Syndrome,
Alzheimers, or sickle cell anemia. To describe exactly how genetic engineering works here is a
description of sickle cell anemia: it is a blood disorder that is genetically passed on and is
characterized by sickle-shaped, or generally abnormal, red blood cells which causes many
problems within the body regarding circulation, which in turn leads to issues within the vital
organs of the body. The smaller branch found on chromosome 11 contains the source gene. With
genetic engineering, that exact portion could be targeted and either removed (if the effects of
removal are non-existent or preferable to the disease) or remedied by replacement with a healthy

Comment [SD10]: Hrmm, this isnt

commonly known info so a citation would
usually be requested.

gene or modification of the current dysfunctional gene. This would cure the patient as well as
prevent the disease from being passed on to further generations.
The decision to use genetic modification is a choice made by the individual or their
family, as well as what to modify and how this way in making this decision, the individual will
have completely control over exactly what happens to their body. It wouldnt be forced on any
individual, merely a provided opportunity to take advantage of. This isnt eugenics; a movement

Comment [SD11]: :

to eliminate unfit traits from the gene pool. The most well known case of eugenics occurred

Comment [SD12]: Not so fun fact: we

sterilized people in the US for a long time too.
Google American eugenicsits really sad.

when the Nazis began to systematically, in large numbers, sterilize and euthanize almost 1
million people total, against their will. This is not to make a master race of genetically

Comment [SD13]: Clarify that its your

argument.

modified super-humans. Genetic engineering is a great method, and the most promising at that,
for a way to cure a large amount of completely unnecessary suffering in the world. Human
beings have minds of their own and they lead lives of their own; this is one opportunity that
humans have discovered from our evolutionary progression in technological advancement.
After all things considered, the positive effects of genetic engineering outweigh the
negative. Genetic engineering may be against morals of many people, religions, and it will be
expensive. It may, even after rigorous testing, have some bad side effects. However, when
looking at the advantages that genetic engineering provides for the entire human race, it is not
logical to dismiss it for the thoughts of only part of the population, or the possible side effects
that could eventually be eliminated, or from the initial high cost of the procedure. Being able
steer the path of the human race, genetically, grants us the ability to remove a lot of the suffering
on the planet. It can be properly controlled and provided in appropriate situations. Taken from an
article about the vast benefits of intentional genetic modification (IGM), Given the severe
biological and moral constraints of unassisted evolution, and given that IGM has the potential

Comment [SD14]: First part of the sentence

doesnt make sense here.

to avoid these limitations, we have good reason to develop the capacity for IGM. (Powell 20)

Comment [SD15]: This source might serve

you better in your body paragraph.

Hopefully one day genetic modification will be a mastered field and also be a common
affordable procedure so that many, if not all, of the genetic diseases affecting the world could be
eliminated.

Works Cited
Frewer, Lynn, and Howard, Chaya, and Shepherd, Richard. Public Concerns in the United
Kingdom about General and Specific Applications of Genetic Engineering: Risk, Benefit,
and Ethics. Science Technology Human Values 22 (1997): 98-124. Print.

Powell, Russell, and Buchanan, Allen. Breaking Evolutions Chains: The Prospect of Deliberate
Genetic Modification in Humans. Journal of Medicine & Philosophy 36 (2011): 6-27.
Online.

Content
Area

Description of An Exemplary Position Paper

Points

Argument

The introduction presents an overview of different stances on the issue, _35_/35

demonstrating an understanding of these views and contains a main
claim statement. The writers main claim is clearly defined and the
writer refers back to this claim throughout the paper. The writer
presents an opposing viewpoint (acknowledges a counter argument)
and successfully argues against that view. The writer uses at least two
scholarly articles or book chapters with opposing viewpoints to situate
his or her own argument. The writer has a clear understanding of these
articles and uses the research to enhance the writers own argument.

Analysis

The writer uses secondary sources (articles or book chapters) in their

__24/25
paper to create an effective dialogue with the opinions of other writers.

Comment [SD16]: Works cited has all the

info, but should be on its own page and Times
New Roman as well. No extra spacing
between citations

The writers critical thinking skills enhance their analysis helping the
writer to present his or her own stance on the issue as an extension of
another writers argument or as a synthesis of two opposing arguments.
Organization

The paper is organized in a logical manner that enhances the flow of the __15/15
writers argument. The writer has included an introduction and forward
thinking conclusion. Body paragraphs have topic/point sentences that
show the reader the paragraphs relationship to the argument and
concluding sentences. The writer has used transitions between ideas
and paragraphs to add to his/her ideas clarity.

Presentation
& Format

The report is free of

distracting errors of grammar, punctuation, and spelling. The report
meets the page length requirement. The writer has used Times/Times
New Roman 12 point font; the document in double spaced, and uses 1
inch margins.

Style

The writer uses an economic style meaning that the language is concise, __5/5
not repetitive or overly wordy. Sentence structure and meaning is clear.

Cover Letter

The writer has supplied a cover letter that discusses the rhetorical
situation for their document (3 points), overview of
strengths/weaknesses (2 points), a request for specific feedback (1
point), and a reflection on the required SLOs (4 points).

10__/10

__8/10

Total:98 /100
Plus one for feedback.

Since youve never seen it, heres the Monty Python scene about your name. Also, if you play
video games, Bioshock is a really interesting discussion on genetic engineering. Its called
splicing in the first two games and enables people to have powers such as telekinesis and
pyrokinesis. Of course, it will also make you go insane over time, so go figure. Still: a GREAT
game.