Text from my

initial WP
submission

An observation
made by De
Piero or
classmates

The changes I
made

. In three different texts about

Run-on and
Excessive
Structure needs
revising

The most persuasive

text was the
biological research
paper, while the least
persuasive was the
mainstream article
because the research
paper used efficient
moves like sources,
tone, abbreviation,
quotes, etc. to
strengthen their
arguments and
views.

homosexuality, the authors

utilize their respective moves to
portray their views on
homosexuality whether it is
about the biological, religious,
or mainstream view of it. Based
on the three texts, the most
persuasive was the biological
research paper

In Homosexuality:
Not a Sin-Not a
Sickness, Tate
utilizes moves in
order to make his
paper credible and to
garner specific
responses

Vague
Could be more
Elaborative

And by including the

opposing argument,
Rodriguez
acknowledges the
worth of both sides
of the argument,
which makes the
paper appear slightly
neutral.
Both types of
genre have different
strengths and
weaknesses

Whats the
connection
between those
two sentences?
How do they
connect?

How this change

impacts my
paper

This change
impacted my
paper because it
gave my paper a
legit thesis. In
the initial
submission, my
thesis is long,
garbled, and not
argumentative.
Now it appears
succinct and
argumentative,
which helps me
write a stronger
paper.
In Homosexuality: This change may
Not a Sin-Not a
appear minor as
Sickness, Tate
I only added a
utilizes moves like
couple words
quotes and sources in into the
order to make his
sentence, but
paper credible and to those words
garner specific
remove the
responses
vagueness and
overall make it a
stronger topic
sentence. I
made that
change because
my topic
sentence did not
fully elaborate
what types of
moves would be
used.
And by including the For this part, the
opposing argument,
change I did was
Rodriguez
adding a
acknowledges the
connection
worth of both sides
between two
of the argument,
paragraphs. I
which makes the
added a
paper appear slightly transition that
neutral. All these
clearly shows my
moves made the
train of thought
article efficient, but
and structure of
whether it made it
the paper. I did
more efficient than
this because it