The Diary of Consuelo Ortiga y Pérez *

16 September 1882

We have met two more Filipinos; one is called Rizal and the other, Perio.

30 September 1882

Rizal brought me a cane this morning which is full of sugar and one cannot tell
how it was put inside. [01]

9 October 1882

Rizal says that he goes out only to go to the medical school and to come here
at night.

18 January 1883

Rizal talked with me for a long time, almost the whole night. He told me that I
was very talented, that I was very diplomatic, and that he was going to see if he
could extract some truth from me within two weeks; that I was mysterious and
that I had a veil over my ideas. He asked me who my favorite author was; I don’t
know what I answered him because I was no longer feeling well. Lete told him
that neither had he understood me and I said that it was easy and I was sure that
Rizal would understand me forthwith. Now I’m sorry for having said this. Have I
not given him hope with it?

Rizal told me that he detested amiable women because when they smiled,
men imagined that they did so for something else. As he had told me the night
before that I was very amiable, I understood that he meant it and I left him so
that he would not make a mistake. A man should first study the ground and if he
sees that the smile is fore everybody he ought not to pay attention to her smiles
because in distributing them so freely they lose all their meaning.

26 February 1883

. . . Rizal is also in love; he has not declared this but almost, almost. He told
me last night that he had a sickness that would not leave him except when
traveling and that was only perchanc4. He also told me and I understood why,
that two brothers had killed each other because both played the same card, that
is,