GREETINGS BASED ON GENDER

Greetings Based On Gender

Lydia Risinger
Mississippi College
Sociolinguistics
May 1, 2014

GREETINGS BASED ON GENDER

Abstract
The purpose of this research paper is to determine how gender affects the length of
responses to greetings. It analyzes several factors that play into response length, including phatic
communication, politeness, power, and stereotypes of male and female speech patterns. Phatic
statements or responses are usually shorter because the primary role of phatic communication is
to acknowledge or fill space. Greetings in general are considered phatic communication, and this
paper seeks to determine how phatic communication determines the length of responses to these
phatic greetings. Politeness also determines how long responses are, especially between two
strangers. The research was conducted between a female sales associate and Pier 1 customers,
therefore all interactions were between strangers, meaning a greater level of formality and
politeness was used. Power also comes into play when determining which gender gives longer
responses. In a female-dominated industry, men are more likely to feel slightly less powerful,
therefore men are more likely to give shorter responses within this social context. The final
factor discussed in the review of literature are the speech patterns of men and women. Women
stereotypically talk more than men, but the research seeks to determine whether or not this is true
specifically in terms of greeting response length. The results prove that women do in fact give
longer responses in the particular social context in which the research was conducted. Overall,
the research successfully provided insight into which factors determine length of responses, and
how gender correlates to response length as well.

GREETINGS BASED ON GENDER

Introduction
The topic of this research paper aims to look at and analyze greetings, specifically in a
retail market setting. As an employee of a retail store, I have recently noticed the many different
responses, or lack thereof, to the simple greeting how are you. This sparked my interest and led
to further research in an attempt to understand why this was happening, and what factors
determined each different response. Not only did this topic interest me, but it also serves a
purpose in helping me as an employee better understand customers. My particular focus is on
gender and how it plays a role in the length of response, how phatic the response is, as well as
how politeness is related to response length. My hypothesis is that males give shorter responses
than females when greeted by female sales associates. This research will highlight the main
factors that influence such responses and determine how gender reflects response length.

GREETINGS BASED ON GENDER

A Review of the Literature

Has How are you Become Just Another Hello?
As in most cultures, it is the social norm to greet the person you have just encountered or
that you may want to pursue a conversation with. Whether this be a simple, good morning, or
hello as opposed to how are you?, or how is the family?, is based on the relationship of the
speakers as well as in what social context the conversation is taking place. When greeting a
customer that has just walked into a retail store, the greeting will mean much less than the
greeting that takes place between family members, friends, etc. In this social setting, the
customer and employee are strangers whom usually have no interest in forming a long lasting
relationship with each other. Several influential figures in the sociolinguistic field have
researched the scenario in which a greeting or short conversation between two or more people
has no purpose at all. Sociolinguists refer to this phenomenon as phatic communication,
meaning words that are conversed purely for the sake of recognizing someones presence.
Many sociolinguists have had much influence on this topic, helping to form the basis of
theories and explanations as to why this occurs and in what social situation this sort of
communication occurs in. Bronislaw Malinowskis view of phatic communication is somewhat
inconclusive, describing it as aimless, prefatory, obvious, uninteresting, sometimes suspect, and
even irrelevant, but part of the process of fulfilling our intrinsically human needs for social
cohesiveness and mutual recognition (Coupland, 1992). He attributes this to human nature, the
psychological need that we have as humans to simply be acknowledged. This sort of
communication fulfills a function yet its meaning is completely irrelevant. Another sociolinguist,

GREETINGS BASED ON GENDER

R. A. Hudson, describes phatic communication as chit-chat that people engage in simply in

order to show that they recognize each others presence (Hudson, 1980).
The common greeting, how are you? seems to have also become this sort of
meaningless inquiry, especially among strangers. When greeting a customer the sales associate is
required to welcome the customer to the store and also ask how the customer is doing. The sales
associate nor customer really care to know how the other is doing, but hey, how are you?
sounds much better than hey, I acknowledge that you are here. In an interesting column written
by a college student for the University of Richmonds newspaper, the student points out that she
too notices this phenomenon on a day to day basis. The writer states that how are yous are
statements not questions (Carmody, 2010) Instead of actually responding to the question, most
of her peers simply returned the question so that a mutual acknowledgement could be made
(Carmody, 2010). Bernard Spolsky adds an interesting note to this greeting as well. He notes that
English greetings range from informal to formal based on social context. He states that it is
common to add a second part of the greeting, a purely phatic how are you! to which no reply
is expected (Spolsky, 1998)
Is Politeness Universal?
In the southern United States especially, children are instilled with a sense of what is
polite and what is not long before they reach a certain age. The varying levels of politeness a
child possesses depends on their own personal environment, and even though they may not
always act according to the social norm, they will understand the mechanisms of politeness. Each
culture has significant influences on how politeness is defined based on age, gender, setting,
ethnicity, etc. The South takes great pride in being known for its southern hospitality, or in
other words, politeness. This politeness is reflected in conversation and greetings. There are

GREETINGS BASED ON GENDER

several theories as to why greetings are associated with politeness, and how these norms are
perceived differently around the world.
According to Jane Austins speech act theory, to say something is to do something
(Austin, 1962). Austin states that utterances are the production of words and sentences on
particular occasions by particular speakers for particular purposes (Wei, 2010) He groups
different speech acts into six different categories known as illocutionary acts. Greetings are
grouped under expressive, therefore they play more into our emotional side and should not
always be taken as seriously as they may sound. Austin gives the example of the greeting, how
are you?. He notes that in most social contexts the speaker uses this phrase in an attempt to
show politeness. When greeting customers in the retail industry, this idea is taken into account.
Positive greetings show politeness on the part of the employee. Customers usually, although not
always, respond in their own way based on what they deem a polite response. Although the
politeness routine is universal, judgment of politeness is not. Judging what is polite and what is
not is based on perceived norms of the situation, community of practice or perceived norms of
society as a whole (Bagwasi, 2012).
Playing off of this theory is the idea of face. In Erving Goffmans study in the late
1960s, he divided face into negative face and positive face. Brown and Levinson then built
off of Goffmans idea, basing their theory of politeness on this idea of face. Brown and Levinson
defined positive face as demonstrating closeness and affectionthe desire to be liked and
appreciatedinvolves such acts as complementing others and showing concern for them
(Bagwasi, 2012). Negative face is defined as distance and formalitydesire to be autonomous,
not to be imposed upon and not to infringe upon others (Bagwasi, 2012). In terms of greetings
in the retail industry, politeness may take on a completely different definition. For this research

GREETINGS BASED ON GENDER

experiment in particular, one might judge the exchange of greetings based on the fact that this
exchange is most likely taking place between two southern people. In this scenario it is assumed
that both have a preconceived knowledge of the societal norm that places such importance on
politeness. If either the employee or customer does not greet or respond to the greeting based on
what is deemed polite by southern society, he or she may be seen as impolite. However, when
acknowledging the social context in which the greetings are taking place, between two strangers
at a furniture store, one might expect the greeting or response to be less personal or flowery. If a
customer comes across as very polite, he or she may be being polite in order to show positive
face. However if a customer is less polite, he or she may be showing negative face. In this
social context, negative face is not always such a bad thing. A customer may just simply not want
to be bothered.
The Power of Politeness
The idea of saving face also has a lot to do with gender as well. Stereotypically, a
female is usually associated as using positive face in most social interactions. The idea that a
woman may be more polite when responding to greetings can be related back in to Austins
theory that greetings are considered expressive, and are connected to human emotion. A
woman is typically defined as generally having a kinder, more caring nature than that of men.
The same idea can be connected to a males response to greetings as well. Men are
stereotypically defined as using negative face in social interactions in order to remain distant and
less connected to their emotions. Negative does not always mean bad as one might infer from
the connotation of the word. It can also refer to the act of formality. Richard Watts makes an
interesting rebuttal towards the definition of politeness. Watts notes that our perceived notion of
politeness may be completely skewed and that there is a possibility that politeness could be

GREETINGS BASED ON GENDER

used by a speaker to exert power over an addressee (Watts, 2005). This is an interesting concept
and supports the idea that a customers positive face reaction is not said in an effort to save
face but in an effort to inadvertently express their socially defined power, which implies that
as a customer they are to be served by the less powerful employee. The hypothesis is based on
the fact that Pier 1 is specifically more oriented to the female shopper rather than the male
shopper. By assuming that women generally give a longer response to a greeting given by a
female employee, may show that the female customer feels that she has more power in that
particular environment. By assuming that men generally give a more concise response to a
greeting given by a female employee, may show that the male feels less power in that particular
environment because it is more female dominated. By giving a shorter response the male may be
inadvertently alluding to the fact that he has absolutely no idea what he is looking for, and that in
his vulnerability he relies solely on the expertise of the female employee to lead the way. While
this is the general rule, there are exceptions.
Who Really Talks More?
The most obvious variable in the differences in speech patterns is undoubtedly gender.
Everyone knows that men and women both speak differently, but why? Is the stereotype that
women talk more than men really true? Researchers have shown that language features are
gender preferential rather than gender exclusive (Dovido et al., 2003). This means that women
and men actually do use the same features of speech, but at different times and with different
frequencies depending on particular contexts. When talking about the structure of conversations,
Spolsky specifically mentions service encounters. He notes that service encounters have a fairly
straightforward underlying structure (Spolsky, 1998). The personal speech acts of customers is
what determines how they navigate within this formal structure of greetings in order to produce a

GREETINGS BASED ON GENDER

response. Females may be more inclined to give a longer response, or no response at all, while
males might be inclined to do the opposite. Specifically in the retail context, males tend to have
shorter responses as opposed to females in most cases. The setting of the conversation alters the
prevalence of female and male linked features (Leaper & Gleason, 1996). One would assume
that if the greeting were to take place in a more male dominated industry the reaction might be
different.
Interestingly, research has actually supported the claim that males generally talk more
than females when in mixed-sex conversations (Hannah & Murachver, 2007). This could be
attributed to several factors. Most females tend to talk less when talking to males, especially
strangers, due to the fear that talking too much would make them appear to be dominating the
conversation. When a female dominates a conversation with a person she just met, she is often
met with negative social consequences. Also to be taken into consideration is that greetings and
conversation, specifically between two strangers, will most likely result in a greater sense of
awareness and politeness. The speaker may be more likely to accommodate for the other speaker
especially on a first encounter, in order to be more relatable. According to the Journal of
Language and Social Psychology, a first encounter will most likely result in increased levels of
politeness and social inhibition (Hannah & Murachver, 2007).
In an experiment published by the Journal of Language and Psychology, mixed-sex
conversations were observed to determine gender preferential responses to speech. The
conversations took place between males and females that had never met. In this experiment,
researchers found that the speech style of those conversing predicted speaking time, regardless of
gender. At the beginning of the conversations, females tended to talk more than males. However,
as the conversations went on, the males began to talk more and the females began to talk less.

GREETINGS BASED ON GENDER

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This phenomenon confirmed the disparity between the female stereotype of talkative women
and that which occurs in practice, that men talk more than women (Hannah & Murachver,
2007). This shows that as conversations went on and as participators became more familiar with
each other, gender preferential speech patterns emerged. From this experiment it can also be
concluded that someones personal speech style is equally as influential as gender in changing
patterns of response. In the retail world, however, customer-employee greetings take place in a
much shorter time span. The customer and employee are greeting each other as strangers,
therefore personal speech styles do not get to emerge as fully as they would if the customer and
employee were able to become more familiar with each other through longer communication.
Like stated before, in this short encounter accommodation is more likely to be apparent more so
than gender differences. Based on the literature, how people respond to greetings is based on
much more than just gender. Personal speech styles, age, ethnicity, social context, familiarity,
etc., all play tremendous roles in how responses are made.

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Method
The research was conducted during two weeks in the month of March 2014, and two
weeks during the month of April 2014. The participants in the study were Pier 1 Imports
customers and all were greeted at random. The customers were not told they were a part of a
research project in order to keep the interaction as natural as possible. Fifty men and fifty women
were greeted by the researcher/sales associate upon entering the store with the same greeting,
hey, how are you?. Once the response was given it was recorded into a notebook under male or
female. After all one hundred responses were given, each was analyzed according to gender.

GREETINGS BASED ON GENDER

Female Responses
Male Responses

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2.98 words per greeting

2.32 words per greeting
Results

Greetings Based on Gender

0.8

70%

0.7
0.6

52%
0.5
38%
34%

0.4
0.3
0.2
0.1

34%
24%

16%
6%

Females

Males

In order to determine which gender gave longer responses, word usage for all fifty
responses for each gender was added and then divided by the number of participants of each
gender, in order to determine average word usage per greeting (149 total words/50 female
participants = 2.98 words per greeting). In order to determine how phatic the responses were, the
number of non-responders for each gender were totaled and then divided by the total number of
participants for each gender (3 non-responders/50 female participants = 6%). Non-responders

GREETINGS BASED ON GENDER

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were those that gave no response at all when greeted by the associate. The number of times a
customer actually responded to the question, how are you? with good, fine, alright, etc.,
was also used to measure if the responses were merely phatic or if they reached a higher level of
communication. In order to measure this, the number of times each particular gender actually
responded to the question was added and then divided by the number of participants for each
gender (35 responses/50 female participants = 70%). This would mean that 30% of the women
gave a phatic response, meaning they did not actually respond to how are you?, whereas 70%
of female participants actually responded to the question with good, fine, alright, etc.
Since a polite response is generally longer than an impolite response, it was important to
measure the politeness levels for each gender. In order to measure politeness, the number of
times a customer asked how are you? in return was recorded (19 asked how are you? in
return/50 female participants = 38%). One-word responses were also recorded. One-word
responses are usually seen as less polite and more straightforward than longer responses. In order
to measure this, the number of one-word responses for each gender were added together and then
divided by total number of participants for each gender (12 one-word responses/50 female
participants = 24%).
Based on the results the hypothesis was proven. Men do give shorter responses than
women when greeted by female sales associates. Men are also more likely to give no response at
all as opposed to women. About half of the male participants actually responded to the question
with good, fine, etc. In terms of politeness, women tend to be more polite than men. Thirtyeight percent of women asked how are you? in return, whereas only thirty-four percent of men
did. This proves the point that women are more concerned with saving face than men are,
therefore they give longer, more polite responses. It could also mean that within this particular

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social context, women are more at ease than men and are more likely to give a longer, more
comfortable response. The number of one-word responses were higher with men than women,
also proving that men give shorter responses than women.
While this research was successful in proving that gender does have a correlation with
length of greeting responses, further research could be done in order to provide a larger variety of
results. This research was conducted in a female dominated industry, however the results may be
different if the experiment was conducted in a male dominated industry. Through this experiment
it has become evident that there are other factors that may even play a larger role than gender in
greeting response length. Race, ethnicity, age, etc., are all very important factors that could each
be further studied.

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References
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