Phuong Chau

ENGL 101
Professor McCampbell
12/17/2015
Revise Essay 2
In receiving my second essay, my grade was 73 point. Along with my grade, I have to
spend more time to write an essay. I need to study hard to improve my writing skills. Then I need
to take a double check before I submit.
In my thesis, I need to make it more clearly stated. I need to make sure it has a strong
persuasive and clearly connection. I will make the reader can meet my significant of influence
about the social implication.
To improve my essay, I will read the article more carefully. I will make sure to use correct
facts in essay. In addition, I will give clearly influences of Wes 2. I need to add more evidence to
support my influencing factors. In the section of expanded social issue, my ideas need to be more
fully supported. I will give the social implications with Wes2.
In my in-text citations, I need to write correct the authors name in citation. Then I put the
article in the citation makers instead. In addition, I will correct the style and alphabetized in work
cited.
In the grammar, I need to choose a correct word in sentences. I need to avoid redundant
wording and slangs in my essay. I will double check my grammar, errors before I submit essay.
After revising my essay, I know clearly my errors in this essay. I hope I can write better
in next essays in the future.