Running head: Myself as a Communicator

Jacob Hughes
COM 122
Brother McReynolds
February 12, 2016

MYSELF AS A COMMUNICATOR

Myself as a Communicator
In life we are surrounded by all different forms of communication. Some loud, some soft,
some verbal, some visual. Everyone has ways, types, and methods to communicate. These
different forms of communication can convey deep and passionate feelings or they can describe
ones hunger. Communication is everything, and without it, there would be no interaction.
Without interaction, there would be no purpose in living. As I seek to better discover the ways I
communicate I am learning much about my flaws and misconstrued ways. But I am also learning
about my strengths, and I am seeking to exploit them to became a more effective communicator.

One of my strengths has also been a weakness throughout my life. It is my empathy for
others. I have an ability to sense, feel, and pinpoint how other people feel about themselves. Its
almost as if I become them for a time, and live in their world, then snap out and come back to
mine. This has led me to recognize others who are struggling immediately and seek out to have
friendships with them, to help them. I find myself being their friends as a means to boost their
confidence, and fill a void. This is a great strength to have when looking to help people who are
not in the best of circumstances. Although this same strength will often prohibit me from being
friendly or warm to those whom I sense are better off and secure in their confidence. I feel ill at
ease around these people and will avoid developing personal friendships with them.

I have always resented my generation for our pathetic means of communicating because I
compare the weaknesses of my generation to the strengths of my mentors, a baby boomer. I feel
as though texting, messaging, snap chatting, and all other forms of social media are faux and
deceiving. I feel as though they are deliberately masterful ways to make life events appear

MYSELF AS A COMMUNICATOR

greater than life, a form of perfection, that can never really be attained, but may only appear as
though it has been. Yet, as it becomes widely popular, I find myself turning more and more to
this way of communicating. I even just asked a girl out over Facebook! I really need to get a
grip.

As I have spoken to my mentor over the years about communicating, he has pointed out
to me, my various flaws and strengths in my way of communicating. He never ceases to remind
me that I am a very caring person and would help someone at the drop of a hat. I am nice to a
fault, and that can be a bad thing. You see, because I have an inner devotion to being nice, I
avoid conflict at all costs. Even if that means confronting someone who is lying, stealing,
maliciously hurting, or anything else bad. As my mentor has continually brought this up to me, I
have really tried to work on it. Sometimes I get so mad at myself for not getting mad, that I
purposefully get mad at someone for no reason. I say things that dont need to be said, that are
my opinion, rather than being brutally honest, in a scheme to prove to myself that I can say it. In
the face of conflict though I usually pull back quickly and try to reconcile the situation.

This leads me to the reason I am focusing on creating a positive communication

environment this semester. I hope that I can master this. I feel as though communication can
always be positive even when it involves conflict. It always needs to be truthful. And truth has a
natural, almost lawful, way of inviting positivity. Maybe that is why Mormons are always so
positive after leaving a Sacrament meeting. When sitting in a room for an hour, hearing nothing
but truth, you cant help but feel positive and hopeful for the future.

MYSELF AS A COMMUNICATOR

I am seeking to build positivity in my day to day conversations. I want to follow the

example of my mother who is a very skilled social worker for DCFS. In her daily tasks of saving
babies from meth heads and heroin junkies she has to face brutal conflict, but has learned to do it
in a positive way. A co worker recently said to her you have a way of telling someone to go to
hell with a smile on your face, and theyll ask you how to get there. I believe when we
communicate truth in a polite and friendly way, conflict will be minimized, even when we are
calling someone out on something they may be sensitive about. It really depends on our
intentions and where our heart is.

Other ways of communication to bring about positivity include; complimenting, serving,

smiling, giving, and paying attention. I wish to grow my quantity of genuine complements. I can
literally see the change in ones face when they receive a compliment. It is like light rushing in. I
have never met a person who did not want to be complimented. Sure there is always an
appropriate time to actually compliment, sometimes public, sometimes private, but there is
something deep within us that craves it. It gives us validation and approval. It invites the Holy
Ghost to the conversation and lets Him know we are trying to seek out the good in each other. I
have never felt the Spirit while I was complaining or murmuring. There is something to be said
about that. Positivity, spiritual feelings, and truth all intertwine to create a powerful and
impactful form of communication. One I am striving to follow.