Using the Element of Suspending Disbelief in Storytelling

By
Darcy L. Hildebidle
EIA 0503-OL1_30024
Arts & Classroom Management

Nova Southeastern University

February 9, 2014

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CHARACTERS
DOCTOR
HOLZKIRK

A German experimental psychiatrist,

confident in his unorthodox techniques,
may be a bit of a quack.

NURSE JANICE

Obedient to Doctor HOLZKIRKs practice

and recommendations, matter-of-factly prim
and compliant; by-the-book.

MR. HOLSTEIN

A disgruntled patient who does not

understand his out of control symptoms or
Doctor HOLZKIRKs bizarre approach to cure
them

INT. PSYCHIATRISTS OFFICE, MIDDAY. NUMEROUS DIPLOMAS ARE

ARRANGED ON THE WALL BEHIND THE DOCTORS DESK, ALONG WITH
SEVERAL GOLF TROPHIES ON A SHELF.
Spotlight illuminates DOCTOR HOLZKIRK as he bends over his office
golf putter set, measuring his shot. Sinks it. He pulls his voice
recorder from his pocket and records one of his patient records.
(Careful German dialect): Patient experiences paranoid delusions typified by
an identity crisis exacerbated by discussion about his relationship with his
mother
Intercom buzzes loudly.
DOCTOR HOLZKIRK
Abruptly stops recording, lowers the device. Walks to his desk and
presses the intercom button.
Yes, NURSE JANICE
NURSE JANICE
(Frantically)
Doctor HOLZKIRK! Mister HOLSTEIN just arrived, and hes mad as a bull.
Now, Ive told him you had no time to see him, but he just wouldnt listen,
and now hes
Suddenly MR. HOLSTEIN bursts through the door, stage lights
illuminate with his entrance.

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MR. HOLSTEIN
(Enraged)
Now listen, doctor (hic), Ive got a bone to pick with youIve been following
your therapy at home to the letter. TO THE LETTER, (hic) understand?
Whats the meaning of (hic) having me checked up on like this?
MR. HOLSTEIN gestures at the audience widely as his voice turns
upon them.
DOCTOR HOLZKIRK
(Into intercom, softly)
Alright, NURSE JANICE, Ill take it from here.
(To HOLSTEIN):
Please do listen, MR. HOLSTEIN, it simply will not do to have patients showing
up at whichever hour they please; this practice follows a strict appointment
system.
HOLSTEIN:
Storms across room to DOCTOR HOLZKIRKS desk.
To HELL with your appointments, HOLZKIRK! I came to see you to quit
smoking FOUR MONTHS AGO, and now, (hic) since your (does air quotes)
HYPNOTHERAPY began, Ive had tremendous bouts of anxiety afterward,
youve got people following me (GESTURES TO AUDIENCE CASUALLY); I
get hiccups constantly, and since last Thursday, Ive mood!
DOCTOR:
(A skeptical look on his face, quietly)
What do you mean, mood?
MR. HOLSTEIN:
(Getting angry)
I mean, mood, you know, like a cow?-- Whenever I get upset! And to make
matters worse, you (hic) have people checking up on me to make sure Im
doing your crackpot techniques? And I can see that youve even (hic) had
them follow me here! This is unaccepta-hic-Moooooo-hic!
HOLSTEIN paces back and forth wringing his hands and glaring at
audience. He finds one audience member in particular and bends
down to eye level, glaring and muttering silently.
DOCTOR HOLZKIRK:
(Patiently, calmly)
MR. HOLSTEIN, please do calm down. Of course you are not being followed
by anyone, there is no one here; that would be utterly (pronounced almost
like udderly) unethical! (Smirks at his own pun).

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MR. HOLSTEIN:
Startled out of his stare-down with audience member
You mean, theres no-moo nobody else here-hic?
HOLSTEIN double takes at his adversarial audience member before
he sinks down on the couch and buries his head in his hands to cry
loudly.
MR. HOLSTEIN:
Hic-MOOOOO. Hic-MOOOOOOO. Hic-hic-MOOOOOOOOOOOO-hic. I could
sure use a cigarette.hic.
DOCTOR HOLZKIRK:
Now, MR. HOLSTEIN, this is no time to relapse after all of your hard work. Let
us see if we can get to the bottom of this. Are you certain that you are
following the technique correctly?
MR. HOLSTEIN:
(Pleading and desperate)
Please, doc, youve gotta listen. Ive been doing everything you asked!
When I feel like smoking I chew the gum, then I lie in the grass to meditate
and imagine calm meadows, and I even increased my milk intake, just like
you suggested, to make up for the calcium deficiencies from all my years of
smoking, and in return, now youre telling me that youre NOT having me
followed? What, am I just IMAGINING all these people? (Gestures to
audience) (Sobs: Hic, hic, mooo.)
DOCTOR HOLZKIRK
Squints to where HOLSTEIN gestures, then shakes his head.
Those are just photographs, HOLSTEIN. PhotographsPictures of
landscapes, farms from my hometown in Germany. Not even people. Now
lets see if we can calm you down.
DOCTOR HOLZKIRK produces a pendulum from his pocket and
begins to hypnotize MR. HOLSTEIN
Doctor: Now, Mr. HOLSTEIN, you just count slowly backward from five.
HOLSTEIN: Five (hic).four.. (Hic) three. (Hic) mooooooo
Lights fade out as HOLSTEIN nods off.
Seconds later, lights fade up and we hear DOCTOR HOLZKIRK
speaking:
DOCTOR HOLZKIRK:

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Now, Mr. HOLSTEIN, now lets take a deep breath in, sehr gut. Now exhale.
Good. Now I want you to begin to feel your body awaken, that is, your
humanbody, which of course doesnt moo. Right, funf, coming awake and
breathing deeply, fier, becoming aware of your senses and smooth deep
breathing, drei, wiggling your fingers and toes, swei, almost awake now, und
eins, entirely awake und alert.
MR. HOLSTEIN:
Breathes in and out deeply with his hands on his chest; jumps to his
feet.
My hiccups are gone! Oh, thank goodness, Doc. And my urge to mDOCTOR HOLZKIRK:
MIS-ter HOLSTEIN, let us just avoid the m word for now. Shall we continue
with your therapy? Im certain that if we stay the course, we will surely
break you of your habit, and also get to the bottom of your, um (glances
toward audience)other issues. This is truly an effective method, MR.
HOLSTEIN, youll see, youll see.
MR. HOLSTEIN:
(Uncertainly)Alright, Doctor, if you say so.
HOLSTEIN continues to stare at the audience, pointing once in
awhile as if he recognizes something about a person he sees.
DOCTOR HOLZKIRK:
Now, MR. HOLSTEIN, were going to do a few exercises together. Are you
ready?
MR. HOLSTEIN:
As Ill ever be
DOCTOR HOLZKIRK:
Now, MISTER HOLSTEIN, how many fingers am I holding up?
MR. HOLSTEIN:
Seven.
DOCTOR HOLZKIRK:
Gut, MR. HOLSTEIN. And how many diplomas do you see on that wall?
MR. HOLSTEIN:
Six. No wait, that one says, Champion Golfer 1998 HOLZKIRK Dairy Open.
So, five.
Turns and glares into audience suddenly after believing he heard
something.

Calls to DOCTOR HOLZKIRK as he approaches the audience.

Now I KNOW Im seeing people over there, Doctor! Look at this lady, right
here!
Houselights fade up as MR. HOLSTEIN walks over to the front row
and gestures to a person in the audience.
Shes clearly sitting here wearing (color) and has her hair (hairstyle) and
from the smell of it, shes wearing sweetgrass cologne and has beautiful
milky skin, and I can see her plain as day, and that gentleman over there
who clearly wants to squeeze my (grips his pectorals through his shirt)-- and
theres nothing any amount of your hypnotherapy mumbomooombo-moooOOOOo..
Holstein clamps hands over his mouth, staring at the audience in
terror. He holds this pose through the following action:
DOCTOR HOLZKIRK:
(Quietly.)
Speaks into intercom.
NURSE JANICE, please come in here immediately with the emergency
therapy. Be quick, now.
NURSE JANICE:
Opens door and quietly sneaks up behind MR. HOLSTEIN with a blow
gun, gently blows a dart into the back of MR. HOLSTEINS neck. MR.
HOLSTEINS eyes roll back in his head and he slumps to the floor.
NURSE JANICE regards DOCTOR HOLZKIRK wearily.
NURSE JANICE:
(Relieved)
Doctor? Was the technique a success?
DOCTOR HOLZKIRK:
On some level, nurse, it was very successful. Please do be kind and
telephone the proper authorities.
NURSE JANICE:
Walks toward DOCTOR HOLZKIRKS desk and picks up the receiver.
Hello, operator? I need the number for Animal Control
Stage lights dim to a spotlight over DOCTOR HOLZKIRK as he

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crouches center stage over MISTER HOLSTEIN.
DOCTOR HOLZKIRK:
Speaking into his voice recorder as he gently strokes the head of
MISTER HOLSTEIN.
Attempt number 203 of bovine cow to human transplant hypnotherapy.
Patient successfully integrated to human daily living for a period of four
months before experiencing bovine sensory relapse combined with acute
paranoid delusions hypothesized to be a result of integration with human
population. Subject will be stabilized in a.a stable.and observed for
further complications.
DOCTOR HOLZKIRK glances up toward the audience, seems to gaze
through them, as he stands to study the photographs of farmscapes
hed described hanging on the wall earlier.
Musing, to himself:
I wonder if hed do well to take a trip to my family farm
Lights fade to black.