Scribd Logo
Upload

Welcome to Scribd!

  • Lazy Bones Flash Fiction

    Uploaded by

    Ben Nicholas
    11 views1 page
    The document describes a very overweight person lounging on their red sofa, being too lazy to change the TV channel but recording a show. It mentions how their weight will ruin the aesthetics of the sofa and compares drinking to forms of self-immolation and sacrifice in different religions. It also talks about joking about identities until someone close comes out, and identifies with overweight characters from movies and books that people laugh at, concluding that their large size will stain the sofa.

    Original Description:

    Copyright

    © © All Rights Reserved

    Available Formats

    DOCX, PDF, TXT or read online from Scribd

    Did you find this document useful?

    Is this content inappropriate?

    Report this Document
    The document describes a very overweight person lounging on their red sofa, being too lazy to change the TV channel but recording a show. It mentions how their weight will ruin the aesthetics of the sofa and compares drinking to forms of self-immolation and sacrifice in different religions. It also talks about joking about identities until someone close comes out, and identifies with overweight characters from movies and books that people laugh at, concluding that their large size will stain the sofa.

    Copyright:

    © All Rights Reserved
    Download as DOCX, PDF, TXT or read online from Scribd
    Flag for inappropriate content
    11 views1 page

    Lazy Bones Flash Fiction

    Uploaded by

    Ben Nicholas
    The document describes a very overweight person lounging on their red sofa, being too lazy to change the TV channel but recording a show. It mentions how their weight will ruin the aesthetics of the sofa and compares drinking to forms of self-immolation and sacrifice in different religions. It also talks about joking about identities until someone close comes out, and identifies with overweight characters from movies and books that people laugh at, concluding that their large size will stain the sofa.

    Copyright:

    © All Rights Reserved
    Download as DOCX, PDF, TXT or read online from Scribd
    Flag for inappropriate content
    of 1

    Lazy Bones

    My DFS sofa Emperor in Rosso Red looked garishly capacious in


    the ads.
    Still, 45-stone of morbid obesity will play havoc with aesthetics.
    Tell that to the art director.
    Too lazy to switch channel; a single flashing crimson dot in front of
    me says I wasnt too lazy to hit record.
    Imagine this in HD:
    A swig.
    Christians call this self-immolation.
    Another swig.
    Buddhists call this self-sacrifice.
    *BELCH*
    The closest most folks come to any of the above is courtesy of
    FRAPE:
    Im gay.
    Funny till your best friend comes out and wonders why no-one took
    him seriously.
    Well, Im Chunk from The Goonies.
    Im Piggy from Lord of the Flies.
    Im every fat, wheezing, asthma-ridden American youve ever
    laughed at.
    And, now, as my callipygous flesh sears and broken intestines smear
    Russo Red-hide with the distinct musk of Eau dPutrefaction
    I am that blot on your sofa protection plan.

    You might also like