Professional Documents
Culture Documents
Master Your Mind Design Your Destiny
Master Your Mind Design Your Destiny
T DUY
THAY I
VN MNH
Adam
Khoo
Dch gia :
Tai ban ln th 4
NH A X U T B A N P HU N
Trn ng Khoa
Ung Xun Vy
Proven Strategies that Empower You to Achieve Anything You Want in Life
by Adam Khoo with Stuart Tan
Copyright 2004 by Adam Khoo Learning Technologies Group Pte Ltd (AKLTG)
Vietnamese Edition 2009 by TGM Corporation
All rights reserved.
TGM CORPORATION
www.tgm.vn
Vn phong tai TP. H Ch Minh
Tng 4, Toa nha Mirae Business Center
268 T Hin Thanh, Phng 15, Qun 10
TP. H Ch Minh
Tel: (08) 6264 7902 Fax: (08) 6264 7906
Vn phong tai Ha Ni
Tng 6, Trng Quc T Ngi Sao Ha Ni
L T1, khu th Nhn Chnh, Thanh Xun
Ha Ni
Tel: (04) 6675 5998 - Fax: (04) 3555 8594
LI NHN GI:
N u ba n o c h t quy n sa c h na y va toa n tm toa n
y la m nh n g ba i t p trong sa c h, cu c s n g cu a ba n
co th se thay i m t ca c h tch c c va ma i ma i .
Li gii thiu
Chung ti xin hn hanh gii thiu ti ban quyn sach Lam Chu
T Duy, Thay i Vn Mnh: Nhng phng phap hiu qua giup
ban at c bt c iu g ban mun. y la quyn sach v NLP
(Lp Trnh Ngn Ng T Duy Neuro-linguistic Programming)
u tin tai Vit Nam c dch va bin soan lai bi chnh nhng
chuyn gia ngi Vit ang nghin cu, thc hanh va ap dung NLP
vao cuc sng hang ngay cua mnh.
Hai dch gia cua quyn sach nay cung chnh la cac dch gia ni
ting Trn ng Khoa va Ung Xun Vy (nhng ngi a tao nn
cac hin tng sach giao duc tai Vit Nam nh Ti Tai Gioi, Ban
Cung Th! va Con Cai Chung Ta u Gioi).
T nm 2006, nhn c s hun luyn va hng dn trc tip t
chnh Adam Khoo va Stuart Tan (hai nha ao tao v NLP hang u
Chu A hin nay), hai dch gia Trn ng Khoa va Ung Xun Vy
a khng ngng tip tuc nghin cu, thc hanh va phat trin phn
nhanh NLP ting Vit danh cho ngi Vit cho n khi quyn sach
nay c ra i.
NLP la mt b mn khoa hoc v phat trin ban thn vi ngn ng
va t duy ong vai tro ht sc quan trong, cho nn vic chuyn
ng cac ni dung v NLP t ting Anh sang ting Vit (vi rt nhiu
im khac bit trong ngn ng, cu truc ng phap,...) mt cach
chnh xac va phu hp vi ngn ng ngi Vit oi hoi nhng hiu
bit tng tn v NLP. Chnh v le o, nhom dch gia a phai u t
rt nhiu thi gian, cng sc hoan chnh quyn sach nay.
MC LC
LI CM N
LI NI U
GII THIU TC GI
CHNG 1: NHNG M THC THNH CNG 1
Lin kt thn kinh: cha kha dn n cc m thc t duy v hnh ng
CHNG 2: CNG THC THNH CNG TUYT NH 31
Ba cch con ngi i din vi tht bi
CHNG 3: LM TH NO T C BT C IU G
BN MONG MUN 63
Ngng k vng v ngng chp nhn ca bn l g?
CHNG 4: CHA KHA CA SC MNH TUYT I 101
Lm th no tr thnh bc thy v giao tip?
CHNG 5: SC MNH KHNG TNG CA NIM TIN 131
Nm bc gip bn thay i nim tin tiu cc
CHNG 6: B QUYT LM VIC T HIU QU TI A 181
Cch thc qun l cm xc ca bn thn
CHNG 7: IU KHIN NO B CA BN T KT QU TI U 229
M thc vt nhanh: phng php thay i thi quen xu
CHNG 8: NEO CM XC: CN IU KHIN CM XC CA BN 287
Ba loi neo cm xc nh hng n cuc sng ca bn nh th no?
CHNG 9: TM NGHA TCH CC CA S VIC 309
Ngh thut chuyn ha ngha tiu cc thnh tch cc
CHNG 10: CC GI TR SNG: NG LC PHN U CA BN 341
Thay i gi tr sng: thay i cuc sng
CHNG 11: THIT K VN MNH 377
Quy trnh by bc gip bn t c mc tiu ra
VI
LI CAM N
Ti tht s khng th tr thanh mt ngi nh ngay hm nay nu khng
co hang ngan ngi yu thng, hng dn, day d, ung h, ng vin
va truyn cam hng cho ti trn chuyn xe cuc i tuyt vi ma ti a
i qua.
Xin cam n cha me ti, Vince, Betty va Joanne, nhng ngi a yu thng,
ung h ti v iu kin trong sut nhng nm thang qua. Cam n v ti Sally,
ngun cam hng va sc manh cua ti. Cam n i tac cua ti, Patrick Cheo,
ngi a chia se tm nhn va lin tuc ng vin ti tin ln mt tm cao
mi. Cam n cng s cua ti, Stuart Tan, ngi a k vai sat canh bn ti
trong s mnh diu ky gop phn lam thay i cuc sng cua chnh mnh va
cua ngi khac. Cam n nhng hun luyn vin cua ti, Gary Lee, Ramesh
Muthusamy, Candice Koh va Carol Tham v nhng n lc lin tuc cai tin
chng trnh cua chung ta vi nim am m va s tn tuy.
Cam n toan th nhn vin cua Adam Khoo Learning Technologies Group
(AKLTG) a lam vic khng mt moi vao cui tun va m khuya xy
dng nn mt cng ty tm c. c bit cam n Sant va Olivia Qiu, Max Tung,
Cindy Lim, Jamie Liu, Serene Wan, CK Chan, Natalie Lim va Carol Lim.
Cam n Tan Mui Siang va Robin Tan v long am m nhit huyt giup ti
vit quyn sach tuyt vi nay. Cam n Pauline Chua a a ra nhng li
khuyn quy bau v tip th.
VII
Quyn sach nay cung xin danh tng cho hang trm tr ly ao tao va thanh
vin Whoosh a tnh nguyn cng hin thi gian lin tuc quay lai va ao tao
trong cac chng trnh SuperkidsTM (Thiu Nhi Siu ng), I Am Gifted,
So Are You!TM (Ti Tai Gioi, Ban Cung Th!) va Patterns of ExcellenceTM
(Nhng M Thc Thanh Cng). c bit cam n cac thanh vin trong ban t
chc va cac tr ly ao tao lu nm nh Andrew Wee, Mok Tuck Sung, AP
Lim, Tiffany Page, Jeannie Lim, Shane Kwek, Mardiana, Shiau Huey, Pete
Tan, Cecilia Chow, Adam Wong, Bernard Koh, Christine Kerk, Daniel
Goh, Nance Peters, Rachel Ong, Yi Chen, Keng Loy, Kelvin Ho, Darren
Toh, Chiong Kong, Yew Siang, Stella, Adwin, Charles Tng, Brenda Tung,
Sherwin Tng, John Tan, Christine Tan, Petrina Wang, Tee Huat, Don Yap,
Shi Ming, Terence Lou, Toh Yew Soon, Lim Xiang, Xiu Li, Joseph Sim,
Peter Khoo, Shukor, Felix Lim, James Leong CF, Alva, Tiong Boon, Shane
Kwek, Alvin Wang, Stacey Thoi, Choon Fah, Shannaz, Chih Chien, Gerald
Lee, Theeban, Patrick Goh, Jeff Tan, Rossana Chen, Alex Ang, Alex Chua,
Lee Kin Mun, Chee Hoe, Shamsudin, Kalai, Irene Low, Wilson Foo, Andrew
Chan, Charles Yuen, Ying Yan, Wai Keong... Qua tht, ti khng th lam c
nhiu nh vy nu khng co cac ban.
Cam n tt ca cac thy hiu trng, thy c giao va giao s ai hoc cua ti
trng cp hai Ping Yi, trng Trung Hoc Victoria va trng ai Hoc
Quc Gia Singapore (National University of Singapore
NUS), nhng
ngi a gop phn to ln trong vic phat trin con ngi ti nh ngay
hm nay. c bit cam n Giao s Wee Chow Hou, Ba Lee Phui Mun,
Ba Ng Gek Tiang, Tin s Kulwant Singh va Tin s May Lwin. Cam n
nhng ngi thy va hun luyn vin a giup ti kham pha tim nng
tht s trong ban thn mnh. Cam n ngi thy u tin cua ti, Ernest
Wong, a day ti nn ngi. Cam n Tin s Tad James, Tin s Richard
Bandler, John LaValle, Tony Buzan, Brad Sugars va Anthony Robbins, tt
ca a giup ti thanh thao Lp Trnh Ngn Ng T Duy (Neuro-linguistic
Programming NLP) va b mn khoa hoc v thay i ban thn.
VIII
IX
Cam n cac nhn vin cua AKLTG v long tn tm va lam vic khng mt
moi. Ti yu thch nhng cng vic ma chung ta lam cung nhau va ti tn
trong cac ban cung ging nh tn trong Patrick.
Cam n nhng ngi ban thn cua ti v tnh ban thn thit cac ban tht
tuyt vi: Melvyn Koh, Manoj Sharma, Tin s Beh Chee Yang, James Leon,
Chan Foo, Apelles Poh, Ian Poh, Yiow Chye Leong, Lillian Lim, Chris Ng, Wai
Chung, Luke Diep, Ronald Tan va Randy Tan, Jerry Low, Sng Yih va Lorraine
Sim, Tin s Edgar Tham, Kae Fong, Willie Lian, Tin s Joel Lee, Julia Lim,
Lydia Low, Rajesh Pillai, Adrian Sim, Samie Tan, Tracy Ong va Lynn Tan.
Cam n nhng nha hung bin a giup ti thanh cng trong cuc sng. Cac
ban lun khin ti ci va mang ti cho ti nhng c hi cung nh kin thc
thanh cng trong vai tro din gia. c bit cam n Clifford va Frances
Ess, Jovin Hurry, Jeremy Eng, Ng Seng Chuan, Dayal Khemlani, Michael
Rodrigues, Dave Rogers, John Sih, Ler Wee Meng, Richard Sng, Irene Wong,
Lillian Lau, Gea Ban Peng, Ng Kwan Kiat, cac thanh vin cua Cu lac b
(CLB) Hung bin cao cp va tai nng (Brilliant Advanced Toastmasters Club),
CLB Hung bin SRC (SRC Toastmasters Club), CLB Hung bin Queenstown
(Queenstown Toastmasters Club), CLB Cng ng hung bin Tanglin
(Tanglin Community Toastmasters Club), CLB Hung bin Fort Canning (Fort
Canning Toastmasters Club), NUS, NTU va CLB Hung bin cua Cu hoc sinh
NUS (NUS Alumni Toastmasters Club), CLB Hung bin Skymedia (Skymedia
Toastmasters Club), CLB Hung bin SIA (SIA Toastmasters Club) va tt ca
nhng ngi ti c may mn so tai din thuyt.
Cui cung, xin cam n nhng ngi a tin phong dn ng. Ti xin bay
to long bit n n Tin s Richard Bandler, ngi thy ln cua ti, ng
thi la mt din gia v song. Ti xin ha vi thy rng ti se ngay cang
tin b hn. ng thi cung cam n John va Kathleen LaValle v a lun
ng vin va quan tm n chung ti trong cac bui ao tao. Cam n John
Grinder va Robert Dilts a dung cam sang lp b mn NLP vi Richard.
XI
LI NOI U
Hay lam chu t duy thit k vn mnh trong thi ai y xao
trn va phat trin cc nhanh nh hin nay.
Co mt v giao s no thu mt ngi cheo o ch ng xui dong sng.
Trn ng i, chng to mnh thng minh va uyn bac hn ngi, v
giao s tm cach thach ngi lai o.
Nht ln mt vin a ven b, ng hoi, Anh co bao gi hoc mn a cht
cha?. Ngi lai o nhn ng ngai ngung va ap, ... khng, thm ch
anh con khng hiu t a cht ngha la g.
cuc i ri con g!. ng ngoc tay ra hiu cho anh tip tuc cheo. Khuc
sng nay kha gp ghnh, song nc p manh vao man thuyn khin con
thuyn nho chao i lc lai.
Nhng con ngi thng kim bac c kia khng y iu nay, ng con mai
ngm day nui trp trung xa xa. ng ch tay v hng o va hoi, Th anh
co bit v a ly khng y?. Cam thy mnh tht thp hen va kem coi,
ngi lai thuyn nut ni nhuc trong long, tra li, Khng.
Giao s ben phan, Ti cung ngh th. Anh a ph ba phn t cuc i ri.
Luc nay, dong sng tr nn hung tn vi nhng cn song ca. Ngi lai o
khng th gi chic thuyn nho thng bng c na. Mt cn song d lt
nhao chic thuyn ln mt tang a ln gia dong.
XII
Hai ngi ngoi ngop gia dong nc, anh lai o quay sang hoi giao s,
XIII
XIV
o la tnh linh hoat lin tuc phat trin bng cach khng ngng hoc hoi,
qun nhng iu a hoc va hoc lai nhng iu mi. o la kha nng m
phong va tai tao thanh cng trong mt thi gian ngn va kha nng phan
ng lai nhng s vic xay ra xung quanh mt cach tch cc.
Nhng ngi thiu ky nng bi (cac v giao s, cac chuyn gia hay nhng
ngi bnh thng) se tip tuc b mi trng xung quanh iu khin va b
ni s s thay i ch ng.
Cui cung, ho se nan ch va tr thanh nan nhn bt lc di lan song manh me
cua s toan cu hoa, ang lin tuc sp xp lai c cu va thay i chong mt.
Trong khi o, nhng ngi co th bi va lt trn u ngon song se giau
co, thanh cng va thnh vng vt ra ngoai sc tng tng.
Trong quyn sach nay, ban se hoc c cach trang b cho ban thn nhng
m thc suy ngh, ky nng va hanh ng lam c iu o. Ban se nm
trong tay cac m thc thanh cng co th lam chu t duy va thit k vn
mnh, bt k th cuc xoay vn nh th nao chng na.
XV
XVI
Stuart Tan
Stuart Tan tt nghip cao hoc nganh Quan tr kinh doanh (ai Hoc Western
Michigan), c nhn Quan tr kinh doanh (bng danh d) va S.D.C.G. Anh hin
la Giam c cng ty Adam Khoo Learning Technologies Group. Tr thanh
nha ao tao t nm 1994 va vi nn tang kin thc v Quan ly, Tm ly hoc,
Ngn ng hoc va T vn, anh tp trung vao lnh vc phat trin ban thn,
tng cng hiu qua lam vic, ky nng lanh ao va giao tip. Anh la nha
ao tao tre nht Chu A c nha sang lp Lp Trnh Ngn Ng T Duy
(Neuro-Linguistic Programming NLP), Tin s Richard Bandler cp bng
chng nhn NLP vao nm 1997.
La nha hung bi n l n g danh ta i Singapore, Stuart a tham d va a t
nhiu giai th n g qu c gia (va khu v c ) trong ca c cu c thi di n thuy t .
Anh at giai nh trong cu c thi Hu n g bi n qu c t khu v c ng Nam
A trong muc thi Di n vn t cho n nm 2001 va a t gia i v ch trong
muc thi Din vn n g x nm 2002. n g th i, anh cu n g la tha n h vin
cua Association for Supervision and Curriculum Development (ASCD),
USA The American Academy of Experts in Traumatic Stress (AAETS)
va c chng nh n trong lnh v c Acute Traumatic Stress Management
(Ch Ng S Cng Th n g T t ).
CHNG
nay ban ang u hay trong hoan canh nao, ban cung la ngi
lun mun vn ti nhng nh cao mi.
Khi cm quyn sach nay trn tay, ban a thc hin bc
quan trong u tin trn con ng i n thanh cng rc
r: Hanh ng bt u bin c m cua ban thanh
hin thc.
Vy nhng m c hin gi cua ban la g? Tao ra nhng thay i
tuyt vi trong cuc sng? Tng thu nhp ca nhn n mc cao
khng tng? Co c kha nng giao tip hoan hao? Hoan thin
ban thn mnh? Tr thanh ngi gioi nht trong hoc tp hay cng
vic? Cai thin mi quan h gia ban vi ngi thn hay vi tt
ca moi ngi xung quanh ban?
Cho du muc tiu cua ban la g i na, ban nn bit mt s
tht rng:
phng phap o cho ti khi nhng lin kt thn kinh chc chn
c tao ra trong nao b chung. Thng ch sau na ting thc
hanh phng phap ghi nh siu ng, cac hoc sinh o a co kha
nng nh c mt danh sach 30 t theo ung th t trong vong
3 phut. (Ban co th tm mua va oc quyn sach Ti Tai Gioi, Ban
Cung Th!, hin ang la mt trong nhng quyn sach ban chay
nht tai Vit Nam.)
Trong mt khoa hoc khac cua chung ti Nhng M Thc Thanh
Cng (Patterns of ExcellenceTM), chung ti cung giang day mt
ky thut c bit goi la M Thc Vut Nhanh (Swish Pattern)
nhm giup hoc vin thay i nhng lin kt thn kinh khng phu
hp nh thoi quen tr hoan, lun chn ch, khng chu hanh ng
kin quyt,...
Ban hay nh rng tt ca nhng thoi quen cua ban u la kt qua
t vic hnh thanh cac lin kt thn kinh. Do o, khi ban hoc c
cach lp trnh lai nhng lin kt thn kinh nay, ban co th thay
i va at c bt c kt qua nao ma ban mong mun.
CHNG 1: NH N G M TH C THA N H CNG
11
13
14
15
16
Cu n g ta i th i i m o , nh m n h a d n d t ti g p la i
ng i ba n cu Stuart Tan. Stuart v tnh cu n g ang trn con
n g kha m pha ba n thn nh ti va s n g i u c hnh
tha n h ngay l p t c gi a hai ng i ba n . o la s g p g cu a
hai con ng i cu n g chung y t n g. Cu n g nhau, chu n g ti a
ta o ra chng trnh Nh n g M Th c Tha n h Cng (Patterns of
Excellence TM) - m t kho a a o ta o c bi t trong ta m nga y v
pha t tri n va t n du n g ti m nng ba n thn.
Khoa ao tao nay a thanh cng vang di. Ch trong vong 12
thang sau khoa hoc u tin, chung ti a ao tao c hn 500
ngi t 16 n 62 tui vi nhng kt qua v cung khch l. Trong
s nhng hoc vin cua chung ti, co ngi kim c hn 250.000
ch trong vong sau thang sau o, co ngi giam c gn 8
kg trong vong ba thang, co nhng sinh vin ai hoc va cao hoc
at c tin b vt bc trong hoc tp, co nhiu hoc vin gat bo
c nhng ni s hai am anh cuc i ho, co nhiu ngi vt
qua c nhng tnh xu c hu hay nghin ngp va hu ht cac
hoc vin u a bit cach t thp sang ln nim am m chay
bong, hoai bao va muc ch sng cua ho.
17
u ban tng thy ti trong cac cuc thi hung bin khu
vc, cac ln din thuyt v phat trin ban thn hoc khi
ti ang lam cng vic t vn, ban co th cho rng ti
18
19
20
21
22
23
24
25
BN LOAI T TNG
C BAN CUA CON NGI KHI OC SACH
Loai t tng u tin la cua mu ngi lun co thai thch chng i:
Chc chn se khng hiu qua. Trc y, ti a oc qua nhiu
27
Tng kt chng
29
CHNG
31
CNG THC
THANH CNG TUYT NH
Thanh cng la mt ngi thy ti. No khin nhng ngi
thng minh cho rng ho khng th tht bai. Bill Gates
31
33
34
35
36
37
Muc tiu
Chin lc
38
39
40
Bc 3. Hanh ng kin nh
Muc tiu
Chin lc
Hanh ng
Bc th ba la hanh ng kin tr va bn b da trn chin lc
ma ban a tao ra hoc hoc hoi c. Bng cach nay, ban se t
t tin gn ti muc tiu, tng bc mt. Hanh ng kin nh la
yu t phn bit gia ke m mng hao huyn vi ngi tht s
thanh cng rc r.
Rt nhiu ngi tha thng minh bit ho phai lam g, nhng
tic thay, ho hu nh chng bao gi chu bt tay vao hanh ng. o
la ly do tai sao a phn nhng ngi o du rt gioi giang nhng
vn tr thanh ngi lam thu cho cac doanh nhn la nhng ngi
41
42
Thanh cng
Hanh ng
t
Tht bai
Khi ban i theo nhng chin lc a t ra va kin nh hanh ng,
ch co hai kha nng xay ra. Kha nng u tin la ban at c thanh
cng ban u va tip tuc tin xa hn na cui cung at c
muc tiu cua mnh. Tuy vy, khng phai luc nao ban cung at c
nhng muc tiu ra. Ban co th hanh ng mt cach y quyt
tm va kin nh, nhng cui cung lai thu c kt qua khng
mong mun. Nhiu ngi goi o tht bai.
43
Cac h th nh t :
Bao cha , bi n minh, l i va nhanh chong bo cuc
Hanh ng
t
Tht bai
Bin h,
li va bo cuc
45
Cac h th hai:
Kin tr han h n g nhng v i cu ng mt chin lc khng i
Hanh ng
t
Tht bai
C gng ln na
46
47
48
Muc tiu
Bai hoc
kinh nghim
Chin lc
Thanh cng
Hanh ng
Tht bai
Vy th m thc hanh ng ma nhng ngi tht s thanh cng
thng th hin la g? Mi khi cha at c muc tiu, ho khng
bao gi xem o la tht bai. Thay vao o, ho xem no la mt phan
hi t thc t nhc nh ho phai nhn lai toan b chin lc va
qua trnh hanh ng cua mnh. Co th chin lc ho s dung
khng hiu qua, hoc ho a khng dn u sc lc vao nhng
thi im quan trong. Sau o ho s dung nhng phan hi nay
rut kinh nghim va lp tc linh hoat thay i hoc iu chnh
chin lc trc khi tip tuc hanh ng ln na.
Nu ho vn khng thanh cng, ho se phn tch nhng phan hi
ky lng hn na, tip tuc iu chnh chin lc va vn kin tr
c gng. Ho tip tuc vong lp nay cho ti khi at c muc ch.
Ho quyt tm lam moi vic cn thit trong khun kh phap ly
va ao c thanh cng. V th, hay nh mi ln ban khng
at c iu mnh mun, o chnh la cach ma cuc sng phan
hi lai cho ban bit nhng thng tin cn thit. iu ban cn lam
la bit lng nghe va phn tch nhng phan hi y, bi chung rt
quan trong cho thanh cng cua ban trong tng lai. Chu n g giu p
ban bit cac h iu chnh chin lc cua mnh sao cho hp ly,
cho ti khi ban co c mt chin lc u tt, giup ban nhanh
chong at c muc tiu.
CHNG 2: CNG TH C THA N H CNG TUY T NH
49
Ngi ta k rng Thomas Edison a tht bai trong hn 10.000 th nghim trc khi phat minh ra bong en in. Khi c hoi ng a lam
th nao co th vt qua nhiu tht bai nh th, ng tra li rng:
ng khng h tht bai, v trc khi tao ra c bong en, ng a phat
minh ra 9.999 cach chc chn se... khng tao ra c bong en. Va
chnh nh hiu bit 9.999 cach o, Edison mi co th i n thanh cng
rc r chung cuc.
Bill Clinton a tng c goi la cu be ngoan cng khng phai la
khng co ly do ring cua no. ng a vp nga nhiu ln vi nhng kho
khn va tr ngai to ln trn con ng i n a v Tng thng My trong
hai nhim ky lin tip. Nhng mi ln nh vy, ng lai rut kinh nghim,
anh gia lai tnh hnh, thay i hoc cai tin chin lc va tip tuc chin
u. Nhng thanh vin trong ban vn ng tranh c va v ng thng
k lai rng, mc du m khuya, nhng nu vn con mt ngi nao ngoai
ng, Clinton vn se rang nan lai noi chuyn vi c tri tim nng
va thuyt phuc ho. Cui cung, nh ng a tng tin mnh se lam c,
Clinton khng nhng la mt trong nhng v Tng thng tre tui nht
lch s nc My, ma ng con c bit n nh la v tng thng v ai
va tm huyt nht cua nc My k t sau Th chin th II. Ngay ca khi
ng phai ri v tr Tng thng sau hai nhim ky lin tip (theo lut nh),
Bill Clinton vn co c 66% s ung h cua ngi dn My. (D nhin, chung
ta phai ch xem tn Tng thng My Barack Obama co th lam tt hn th
hay khng?)
H thng
nim tin
Gia tr
sng
Th
ay
Muc tiu
Chin lc
Thanh cng
Hanh ng
Bai hoc
kinh nghim
Tht bai
51
53
54
55
56
57
58
59
60
61
Tng kt chng
1 . Cng Th c Thanh Cng Tuyt nh
H thng
nim tin
Gia tr
Sng
a
Th
Bai hoc
kinh nghim
Muc tiu
Chin lc
Thanh cng
Hanh ng
Tht bai
2 . Co ba ca ch chung ta i mt vi tht ba i
a. Bao cha, bin minh, li va nhanh chong
bo cuc.
b. C gng nhiu ln vi cung mt chin lc
cho du tht bai, cho ti khi b tc va buc
phai bo cuc.
c. Nhn phan hi, rut kinh nghim thay i
chin lc, kin tr hanh ng cho ti khi co
c mt kt qua nao o. Lp lai qua trnh
nay n khi at c muc tiu mong mun.
62
CHNG
LAM TH NAO AT C BT
C IU G BAN MONG MUN
Khng mt ai t thay i cho n khi ngi y cam thy buc
phai lam iu o. Socrates
CHNG 3: LA M TH NA O A T C B T C I U G BA N MONG MU N
63
Ho lam bt c iu g cn lam
g ca
ao c
64
65
66
CHNG 3: LA M TH NA O A T C B T C I U G BA N MONG MU N
67
68
CHNG 3: LA M TH NA O A T C B T C I U G BA N MONG MU N
69
70
CHNG 3: LA M TH NA O A T C B T C I U G BA N MONG MU N
71
72
CHNG 3: LA M TH NA O A T C B T C I U G BA N MONG MU N
73
74
CHNG 3: LA M TH NA O A T C B T C I U G BA N MONG MU N
75
76
CHNG 3: LA M TH NA O A T C B T C I U G BA N MONG MU N
77
C MUN
Ngng Ky Vong
10.000
BT BUC
Ban se khng cho phep ban thn mnh chp nhn mt cai g di
Ngng Chp Nhn cua ban, bi v i vi ban, o la mc ti
thiu. No cung chnh la mc chu ng cua ban, bi v khi ban
b ri xung thp hn Ngng Chp Nhn cua mnh, ban se phat
hoang va bt u lam vic tch cc va sn sang lam tt ca nhng
g co th giup ban thn quay lai trn Ngng Chp Nhn. D
nhin, mt khi ban a ha quyt tm lam bt c vic g th ban se
at c iu o.
CHNG 3: LA M TH NA O A T C B T C I U G BA N MONG MU N
79
CHNG 3: LA M TH NA O A T C B T C I U G BA N MONG MU N
81
82
CHNG 3: LA M TH NA O A T C B T C I U G BA N MONG MU N
83
CHNG 3: LA M TH NA O A T C B T C I U G BA N MONG MU N
85
.............................................................................................................
.............................................................................................................
.............................................................................................................
.............................................................................................................
.............................................................................................................
S nghip: Ban mun at c nhng thanh tu to ln v ai nao trong
bc ng s nghip hoc trong kinh doanh?
.............................................................................................................
.............................................................................................................
.............................................................................................................
.............................................................................................................
.............................................................................................................
.............................................................................................................
86
.............................................................................................................
.............................................................................................................
.............................................................................................................
.............................................................................................................
.............................................................................................................
.............................................................................................................
.............................................................................................................
.............................................................................................................
.............................................................................................................
.............................................................................................................
.............................................................................................................
CHNG 3: LA M TH NA O A T C B T C I U G BA N MONG MU N
87
.............................................................................................................
.............................................................................................................
.............................................................................................................
.............................................................................................................
.............................................................................................................
Cac mi quan h ca nhn: Nhng mi quan h vi ban be va gia nh
ma ban chp nhn c la nh th nao?
.............................................................................................................
.............................................................................................................
.............................................................................................................
.............................................................................................................
.............................................................................................................
Suy ngm: Ban co nhn thy s khac bit rt ln gia nhng g ban ky
vong va nhng g ban chp nhn khng? Khi ngh v iu o, co phai
ban bt u nhn ra rng cuc sng cua ban chnh la kt qua cua Ngng
Chp Nhn ma ban ra cho mnh?
1
2
3
4
5
Mc thu nhp trung bnh cua ho co kha gn vi thu nhp cua ban
khng? y phai chng la mt s trung hp ngu nhin?
iu tng t cung xay ra vi nhng lnh vc khac trong
cuc sng cua ban nh s nghip, li sng, sc khoe, cac mi
quan h,...
D nhin, ti hoan toan khng co y nh bao ban phai gat bo
nhng ngi ban a bn ban bao nhiu nm nay va la nhng
ngi ban tht s quy mn. iu ma ti mun noi la, nu ban
mun vn mnh cao hn nng Ngng Chp Nhn cua ban
ln, th ban cung cn u t thi gian cho nhng ngi co th thuc
y ban tin ln pha trc, nhng ngi khng ngng nng cao
tiu chun cua mnh. Va cung chnh ho la nhng ngi se truyn
cam hng thay i cho ban, khin ban khng con thoa man vi s
trung bnh cua mnh na.
Hay ngh v iu nay. Nu ban la vn ng vin qun vt va
ban lun u vi nhng ngi chi xp x ban, th ban co th cai
thin trnh cua mnh khng? Cung co th, nhng chc chn se
rt chm va i khi s tin b la khng ang k. Ngc lai, iu
g se xay ra nu ban lun phai thi u vi nhng tay vt hn ban
rt nhiu? Chc chn la ban se khng t ln ngm ngui v thua ho,
nhng iu o cung ng thi khin ban phai tm u moi cach
CHNG 3: LA M TH NA O A T C B T C I U G BA N MONG MU N
89
v ho se truyn cam hng cho ban cung nh khin ban cam thy
khng con thoa man vi s trung bnh cua mnh na.
Mc thu nhp: Ban cn bao nhiu tin tht s sng thoai mai? K tn
ba ngi ma ban mun danh nhiu thi gian bn ho.
.............................................................................................................
.............................................................................................................
.............................................................................................................
.............................................................................................................
.............................................................................................................
.............................................................................................................
.............................................................................................................
.............................................................................................................
.............................................................................................................
.............................................................................................................
90
.............................................................................................................
.............................................................................................................
.............................................................................................................
.............................................................................................................
.............................................................................................................
.............................................................................................................
.............................................................................................................
Sc khoe: Ban mun mnh cn nng bao nhiu? Ban phai co mt c th
khoe manh nh th nao?
.............................................................................................................
.............................................................................................................
.............................................................................................................
.............................................................................................................
.............................................................................................................
.............................................................................................................
.............................................................................................................
S nghip: Ban cn mc thng tin nh th nao trn con ng s
nghip va kinh doanh?
.............................................................................................................
.............................................................................................................
.............................................................................................................
.............................................................................................................
.............................................................................................................
.............................................................................................................
.............................................................................................................
CHNG 3: LA M TH NA O A T C B T C I U G BA N MONG MU N
91
.............................................................................................................
.............................................................................................................
.............................................................................................................
.............................................................................................................
.............................................................................................................
.............................................................................................................
.............................................................................................................
.............................................................................................................
.............................................................................................................
92
tui 44, Leo Burnett thanh lp mt cng ty nho ma sau nay tr thanh
mt trong nhng cng ty quang cao hang u th gii. ng bt u
cng vic kinh doanh cua mnh vao nm 1935 gia cuc khung hoang
kinh t t hai nht trong lch s. Va kinh doanh, ng a phai s dung
toan b s tin bao him nhn tho cua mnh, cm c nha mnh va bo ra
tt ca s tin danh dum c. o la cach ma Burnett t mnh vao th
phai hanh ng. Va chnh v th, ng hiu rt ro rang, ng khng con
la chon nao khac ngoai vic phai thanh cng. Mt khi thanh cng tr
thanh iu bt buc va tht bai la khng th chp nhn c, Burnett
a tht s lam ht sc mnh xy dng va phat trin cng ty cua ng
tr thanh mt trong nhng cng ty hang u th gii vi doanh thu
hang trm triu mi nm.
CHNG 3: LA M TH NA O A T C B T C I U G BA N MONG MU N
93
94
CHNG 3: LA M TH NA O A T C B T C I U G BA N MONG MU N
95
CHNG 3: LA M TH NA O A T C B T C I U G BA N MONG MU N
97
98
Tng kt chng
1. Hu ht cac muc tiu ma con ngi a ra chng la g
khac ngoai nhng c mun nhat nheo yu t. Th nn,
ho bao gi cung tm c nn na trong vong thoai mai cua
mnh va tr hoan hanh ng.
2. Cach duy nht co th giup ban at c bt c iu g
mnh mun la ha quyt tm lam iu o nh mt iu
bt buc.
3. Khi ba n quy t tm la m b n g c m t i u g o ,
ba n nh t nh se tm ra ca c h. u co y ch, o co
con n g.
4. Ai trong chung ta cung co Ngng Ky Vong va Ngng
Chp Nhn cua ring mnh. Va ai cung co xu hng
nghing v Ngng Chp Nhn hn la c gng hng
ti Ngng Ky Vong.
5. Ban phai nng cao Ngng Chp Nhn bng cach thit
lp mi quan h vi nhng ngi hn hn mnh, du
trong vic chi th thao, hoc tp, lam cha me hay trong
s nghip. Nhng ngi hn hn ban la nhng ngi se
truyn cam hng giup ban tin ln va khin ban khng
th ngu qun trn vong nguyt qu cua ngay hm qua.
6. Ban phai t mnh vao tnh th khng th rut lui nu
ban mun at c mt iu g o. Hay lam cho ca ban
dn thin ha bit quyt tm cua mnh va nh th ban se
khng con cach nao khac ngoai vic phai thanh cng.
7. Ngn t ma ban dung tac ng n suy ngh va xuc cam
cua ban. Hay lun s dung nhng t ng manh me nh
phai, buc phai, cn phai,... chung giup ban
lun trong tm th y ng lc va sang tao.
99
CHNG
101
102
103
104
105
107
108
109
111
113
Tiu biu nht la vic ma Lee Iacocca a lam khi Henry Ford II ui
vic ng v mu thun ca nhn. ng nhe nhang ra i ri u qun cho
Chrysler vn la i thu di c cua Ford thi by gi. Iacocca khng
nhng co cng ln trong vic phuc hi Chrysler ang bn b vc pha
san, ma con giup cng ty mi cua mnh nhanh chong bt pha ln va
qua mt hang Ford (a ui ng).
Hay la ta hay xem cach ma Ivana Trump a lam vi ng vua bt ng san
Donald Trump khi ng bo ri ba chay theo mt c gai tre hn. Thay
v anh mt mnh trong mt mat to ln nh th ma chm m trong ru
che hay tuyt vong, Ivana ngc lai chon sng mt cach y sc sng. Ba
phat i mt thng ip cho nhng ngi v b phan bi khac, ng ni
gin ma hay oi lai cng bng!, va ba a chin thng trong vic oi mt s
tin bi thng li d xng ang t ngi chng cu.
115
50%
Tra c h nhi m
50%
Tra c h nhi m
117
100%
Tra c h nhi m
100%
Tra c h nhi m
Nhng ngi giao tip gioi ht long tin tng rng, y ngha thng
ip cua ho chnh la phan hi ma ho nhn c, bt k y nh ban
u cua ho khi gi thng ip i la nh th nao.
V du, nu ho mun noi ln s thanh tht cua mnh, nhng pha
tip nhn lai cam thy ho khng thanh tht, th ho se lanh trach
nhim: co th thng ip cua ho cha c chn thanh cho lm,
du cho ho rt thanh tht; co th do giong noi hay ngn ng c
118
Ban cn hiu rng, mi ngi khac nhau nhn thc v cuc sng
khac nhau, va mi ngi u co mt b loc thng tin ring bn
trong nao cua mnh. Khi ban k chuyn ci, se co mt s ngi
ci cung vi ban, trong khi o cung se co nhng ngi khac
khng ci v ho khng thy co g bun ci ht. o khng phai
la do nhom th hai khng co khiu hai hc, ma ch v ho quan
nim v tnh hai hc khac vi nhom th nht thi. La ngi
giao tip gioi, co ngha la ban phai chu trach nhim trong giao
tip va co y thc thay i cach truyn at cua ban ( y la cach
k chuyn ci) cho n khi lam cho tt ca moi ngi cung ci
c mi thi. V th, chu trach nhim va linh hoat chnh la cha
khoa tr thanh ngi giao tip hiu qua.
119
Giao tip
Ngn t
=
7%
Giong iu
38%
Ngn ng
c th
+
55%
Mc du iu ban noi cung ong vai tro quan trong, nhng no lai
t co tac ng hn so vi cach ban noi (th hin qua giong iu
va ngn ng c th). Ban hay lam mt th nghim v phat hin
nay... vi mt tm gng. Hay noi vi mt khach hang la cng ty
cua ban tuyt vi va tt ep ra sao bng nhng ngn t ep nht,
nhng lai vi giong noi nho u u, khun mt b ph, t th ra
chiu mt moi, hi th nhanh dn dp, th xem ban se cam thy
tin c bao nhiu phn trm nhng g ngi trong gng noi.
Ln no, mt giao vin n xin y kin cua ti bng giong noi u xu
va ve mt chan ngan, u dt: Ti khng bit tai sao, nhng ti khng
th nao truyn cam hng cho hoc tro cua mnh, bt k ti noi th nao
i na. Luc y, ti ch mun noi toac ra rng: thy hay nghe lai
giong noi cua mnh qua bng ghi m va ng trc gng ngm
ve mt cua mnh khi noi xem co thy co th truyn cam hng cho
chnh ban thn mnh c khng. Nhng d nhin, ti a khng
th qua thng thn nh th v co th b hiu lm la th l.
Vn la ch, khi ta giao tip vi mt ngi khac, ban cn chu y
khng ch n li le ban dung, ma quan trong hn la giong iu ban
noi, cung vi ngn ng c th (c ch, net mt, t th, anh mt,...) ban
th hin. By gi th ban a hiu, nu ban b hiu lm, mc du ban tin
rng mnh a noi rt ro rang, th iu o co ngha la co th giong iu
hay ngn ng cua ban ang noi ln... iu ngc lai.
120
121
122
123
124
125
126
127
Thay v noi
128
Hay noi
Ti tuyt vong.
Ti toan gp nhng hu
qua t hai.
Sc khoe ti rt kem.
129
Tng kt chng
1.
2.
6.
7.
130
CHNG
131
131
133
134
135
136
HIU NG PYGMALION
Nim tin cua ban khng ch anh hng n hanh ng va kt qua
ban thu c, ma con anh hng n nhng ngi xung quanh khi
ho tng tac vi ban. La mt ngi thy, mt bc phu huynh hay
mt ng chu, nim tin ma ban co v hoc tro, con cai hoc nhn vin
cua ban se anh hng n cach ban i x vi ho, cach ho i x
ngc lai vi ban, va cui cung la cach ho hanh x.
CHNG 5: S C MA N H KHNG T N G CU A NI M TIN
137
138
139
140
141
142
Ngi an ng thn ky
Vao nm 1981, chic may bay ma ng chu nganh bao him Morris
Goodman ang iu khin t nhin gp s c m u xung t,
khin ng b thng rt nng: c ng b gay t xng sng th nht
va th hai, cac dy thn kinh dn n c hoanh b tn thng nng, con
c hoanh b e nat n ni ng phai dung may h hp nhn tao mi co
th nut thc n, noi chuyn hay ht th. Cac dy thn kinh khac cua ng
cung b tn hai n mc thn va gan cua ng khng hoat ng c va
c th ng b lit t c tr xung.
anh gia tnh trang chn thng nay, cac bac s cho rng Morris ch co mt
phn ngan c hi sng sot. Thm ch nu ng sng c, ho cung tin rng
ng se khng bao gi vn ng c c th va phai ngi xe ln sut i.
Vy ma Morris a qua khoi nh vao nim tin manh lit cua mnh. ng
tin rng mnh se hi phuc va se t mnh bc ra khoi bnh vin ma
143
144
TRAI CHANH U?
Ban co mun lam th nghim nay vi ti khng? u tin, ti
mun ban hay oc oan vn bn di, lam theo hng dn va
tng tng hnh anh trong u. Ban cung co th nh mt ngi
nao o oc oan vn cho ban nghe trong khi ban lam bai tp
tng tng di y. Ban a sn sang cha?
Ti mun ban nhm mt lai va tng tng ban ang ng trc
tu lanh trong bp. Trong tm tr, ban nhn thy ban thn ban ang
m ca tu lanh va p vao mt ban la mt trai chanh mong nc,
chua, to, mau vang m t ngay gia tu.
Hay tng tng ban vi tay ly trai chanh nay. Hay cam nhn
nng cua trai chanh y nc, cam giac lanh thm vao ngon
tay ban trong khi ban mn m vo chanh lang bong. By gi, ban
hay mang trai chanh o n ban n trong bp, vi ly con dao ben
bn canh ct mt lat chanh. Ban thy nc chanh rn ra xung
quanh. Ban bo lat chanh o vao ming va nhai, cam nhn v chua
trn li va quanh ming ban, hng chanh toa ra khin ban hi
nhn mui lai. Nao, by gi ban hay m mt ra.
145
146
DIN TP TRONG TM TR VU KH B MT
CUA CAC VN NG VIN NGA
Nhiu ngi a s dung sc manh cua vic hnh dung hoat
ng trang thai hiu qua ti a. c bit trong lnh vc thi u
th thao, ky thut nay c goi la din tp trong tm tr.
Trong nhiu nm lin, cac vn ng vin Nga lun chin thng
va chim u th trong mn th thao nhao ln tai ai hi Olympic.
Cac vn ng vin My cung n lc tp luyn nhng khng th
nao hiu c, lam th nao ma ngi Nga lun co th thi u
gn nh hoan hao n vy. Mai sau nay, ngi My mi phat hin
ra rng cac vn ng vin Nga c cac nha tm ly hoc th thao
hng dn phng phap ren luyn tm tr cung nh th cht.
Bn canh vic ren luyn c th, b mt cua cac vn ng vin Nga la
danh ra vai gi ng h mi ngay tng tng ban thn ho thc
hin nhng cu nhay tuyt ep, nhao ln trn khng va ap xung
mt cach hoan hao. Chnh vic nay a giup ho thi u phong
gn nh tuyt i. Ngay nay, tt ca cac vn ng vin hang u
u s dung sc manh cua vic hnh dung thi u trong trang
thai tt nht. Trong quyn sach cua Tiger Woods vn ng vin
anh gn hang u th gii co noi v vic anh mng tng ban
thn mnh tung ra nhng cu anh tuyt hao va thy qua banh ri
trung ch, ngay trc luc anh tht s vung gy anh nh th nao.
147
148
149
150
151
152
153
154
!!!
MT N
DOANH NHN
THANH AT!
C A LA B
NH CUA MT
AI GIA NAO
O CH G!!!
155
156
157
IM MU TRI GIAC...
BAN A BAO GI GP TRNG HP NAY CHA?
a khi nao ban trong tnh hung nay cha? Ban ang ngi
trong phong khach xem tivi th nghe ting v ban goi ln, Anh
vao bp ly gium em hu mui c khng?. Anh khng bit no
u, ban tra li. C y noi vong lai, Anh tm xem. No nm u
o thi.
Mt cach min cng, ban ng dy va i vao nha bp lm bm
mt mnh, Mnh khng bit hu mui u, lam sao mnh tm thy no
c y?. Chc chn la ban nhn quanh qut khp ni ma vn
khng thy hu mui. Ban anh quay ra va noi, Anh khng tm
thy hu mui u ca.
V ban lai noi, Anh tm ky xem, no o thi ma. Ban nhn ln,
nhn xung ma vn khng thy hu mui. Cui cung, v ban bc
vao bp, vi ly hu mui ngay trc mui ban va noi, Th y la
cai g? Mt anh u y?.
Tai sao vic nay lai xay ra? Theo nganh tm ly hoc, hin tng
nay c goi la im mu tri giac. y la mt trong nhng v du
ph bin nht v vic nim tin xoa bo nhng g ban nhn thc.
Nu ban lin tuc thuyt phuc ban thn rng ban khng th nao
tm thy hu mui, nao cua ban se xoa hnh anh hu mui bn trong
nao, cho du mt ban vn nhn thy hu mui s s ngay o.
Tng t, nu ban tin rng khng co c hi xung quanh va thi
im kinh t nay t hai ht ch noi, ban se xoa i moi th i
ngc lai nim tin cua ban, va ban se ch thy kho khn nhan
nhan khp ni.
158
Ky luc chay mt dm
trong vong 4 phut
12,75 giy se khng
bao gi b pha v.
c tp oan Microsoft,
ng u tng lp
luyn vin ai hi
vao u nhng nm
1980)
Con ngi se
khng bao gi ti
c mt trng
cho du khoa hoc
co tn tin n
mc nao i na.
(Tin s Lee De Forest,
nha phat minh ng
khuch ai Audion
va cha e cua ra-i-)
Trai t la trung tm
cua vu tru.
(Ptolemy, nha thin vn
hoc Hy Lap v ai, th
ky th hai)
Khng co chuyn
con ngi se tn
dung nng lng
nguyn t.
(Robert Milliken,
oat giai N-ben Vt
ly, nm 1923)
Khng ai mun
nghe din vin
noi chuyn.
(Harry M. Warner,
Hang Warner Bros
Pictures, nm 1927
thi ma nhng b
phim cm con ph
bin)
159
160
Bng chng
Bng chng
Bng chng
Bng chng
161
162
TI HOC DT TOAN
Khng lam
Thi rt
c phep
tnh nhn
tt ca cac
Tra li sai
trong lp
bai kim
Me ti bao ti
tra Toan
tha hng
gien di truyn
cua ba
163
164
Khng th lam c
Me ti bao ti tha
cua ba
co th hiu c.
phng phap.
165
166
167
Nim tin gii han v con ngi va kha nng cua ban
Ban co tin vao mt hay nhiu iu di y khng?
Ban con qua tre? a qua gia? Khng giao tip tt? Li bing?
Khng u thng minh? Thiu kinh nghim? Khng u tai nng?
Khng may mn? Khng u nng lc kinh doanh? Thiu ng
lc? Ban ngh ban se khng bao gi at c nhng iu g?
.................................................................................................................
.................................................................................................................
.................................................................................................................
.................................................................................................................
.................................................................................................................
.................................................................................................................
.................................................................................................................
.................................................................................................................
.................................................................................................................
.................................................................................................................
.................................................................................................................
168
169
Nim tin gii han v ngh nghip hay cng vic kinh doanh
Ban co tin rng:
Th trng a n im bao hoa? Vic kinh doanh rt kho khn?
Kho ma kim c tin trong thi ky suy thoai? Khng h co c
hi ngoai kia? Co mt iu g o hay mt ai o ngn can vic ban
c thng chc? Ban khng th tng trng li nhun? Ban khng
th m rng kinh doanh?
.................................................................................................................
.................................................................................................................
.................................................................................................................
.................................................................................................................
.................................................................................................................
.................................................................................................................
.................................................................................................................
.................................................................................................................
.................................................................................................................
.................................................................................................................
Ban a lit k tt ca nim tin gii han cua ban cha? Ti mun ban
bit rng ban phai thay i nhng nim tin gii han nay trc khi
ban co th thay i cht lng cuc sng cua ban. S khac bit gia
ngi thanh cng, ngi trung bnh va ke tht bai nm nhng
nim tin ma ho co c v ban thn va nhng ngi xung quanh.
Ban a sn sang loai bo nhng nim tin gii han nay va cai t
nhng nim tin tch cc khac vao nao b cua ban cha? Tt lm!
Co nm bc thay i nim tin gii han cua ban.
170
171
......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
1.2 Nim tin nay a gy ra hu qua g cho ti trong qua kh?
Ti a phai tra gia ra sao cho vic bam vu vao nim tin nay?
......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
.....................................................................................................................
172
......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
173
......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
2.2 Nhng bng chng nao cung c nim tin gii han nay?
a
......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
174
......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
c
......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
d
......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
e
......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
2.3 Lam th nao anh sp nhng bng chng nay? iu nay con
co y ngha nao khac? Co v du phan bin nao khng? Ngun thng
tin nay co ang tin cy khng?
a
......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
b
......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
CHNG 5: S C MA N H KHNG T N G CU A NI M TIN
175
..................................................................................................................
.................................................................................................................
.................................................................................................................
d
......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
e
......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
176
.................................................................................................................
.................................................................................................................
.................................................................................................................
.................................................................................................................
.................................................................................................................
.................................................................................................................
.................................................................................................................
177
......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
b
......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
c
......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
d
......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
e
......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
.................................................................................................................
.................................................................................................................
.................................................................................................................
.................................................................................................................
.................................................................................................................
.................................................................................................................
.................................................................................................................
.................................................................................................................
5.2 Vi nim tin mi nay, ti se co nhng li ch sau:
.................................................................................................................
.................................................................................................................
.................................................................................................................
.................................................................................................................
.................................................................................................................
.................................................................................................................
.................................................................................................................
.................................................................................................................
Vy th, bt c khi nao ban mun thay i mt nim tin gii han
hay giup ai o vt qua rao can trong t tng, hay lam theo nm
bc trn. Chung ta hay cung bc sang b quyt lam vic at
hiu qua ti a....
179
Tng kt chng
1.
2.
3.
4.
5.
6.
7.
8.
9.
180
CHNG
181
hai chng nhng ngi uyn bac nht, thng minh nht
hay hoc gioi nht u gt hai nhng thanh cng tt bc?
D nhin la khng, v nu vy th tt ca nhng ng/ba
tin s hay cac thanh vin Hi MENSA (Hi nhng ngi co
ch s thng minh cao nht) u tr thanh triu phu ca. S i
thng tr tru, mt s ngi hoc cc gioi cui cung lai phai i
lam thu cho nhng ngi co hoc vn trung bnh.
K ra th co Bill Gates, Steve Jobs, Oprah Winfrey, Steven Spielberg,
Larry Ellison, Soichiro Honda va Richard Branson... tt ca u
khng tt nghip ai hoc. Vy ma ho a gy dng c nhng
tp oan tr gia hang ty la va giao cho cac nha quan ly, chuyn
gia tai gioi vn hanh, trong s o co nhiu ngi co bng MBA
hoc tin s Kinh t trng Harvard danh ting. Vy lam th nao
ma nhng ngi khng co tm bng ai hoc lai lam c iu
o? n gian la v ho a hanh ng khng ngng.
CHNG 6: B QUY T LA M VI C A T HI U QUA T I A
181
182
183
184
185
Ban a hoan tt bai tp nay cha? Nu cha, hay quay lai lam ngay
by gi v y la mt bai tp cc ky quan trong. By gi, gia s ban
a co danh sach mi cam xuc thng thng cua mnh, ti mun
ban hay anh du bn canh nhng cam xuc tch cc i vi ban nh
hao hng, manh me, quyt tm... o la nhng cam xuc khin
ban hanh ng va at hiu qua ti a. Hay lam ngay by gi.
186
2 Phn khi
4 Tran y sinh lc
6 Cng thng x
7 Gin d x
8 Lo lng x
9 Vui ve
10 To mo
Mt khac, hay nhn vao danh sach cam xuc cua mt ngi
bnh thng va cha bao gi at c nhng thanh cng ma
le ra anh ta hay ch ta co th at c.
CHNG 6: B QUY T LA M VI C A T HI U QUA T I A
187
2 Lo s x
3 Li bing x
4 Tr hoan x
5 Phn khi
6 Lo lng x
7 Vui ve
9 Bun te x
Danh sach ma nhng cam xuc tiu cc chim a s trn cung chnh
la mu s chung cua nhng ngi thng minh sang lang nhng
khng at c thanh cng tt bc. n gian la v ho lin tuc trai
qua nhng cam xuc tiu cc nh lo s, nan long, li bing
va th .
188
189
191
193
Xoa bo
Bop meo
uc kt
Nim tin
Nhn thc
Gia tr
Thai
S vic
bn ngoai
194
195
196
197
198
199
200
201
Mt
Hi th
Nng va chm
Giong noi
m vc thp
C bp
C mt
y chnh la dang ve iu b
c trng cho cam xuc chan
nan mt moi. Nh ban thy
y, chung ta phai n lc rt
nhiu tao ra mt cam xuc.
Ch v mt s ngi a lam vic
nay qua nhiu nm ri nn ho
chuyn vao cam xuc nay kha
chuyn nghip va d dang.
202
Bai tp: Thoat ra khoi s chan nan bng cach thay i dang
ve iu b cua ban
Chuyn g se xay ra nu ban buc mt ngi ang cam thy chan
nan mt moi phai hoan toan thay i dang ve iu b cua anh ta?
Khng phai thay i mt vai ch ma phai thay i tt ca.
T th
Ngi thng ln
Mt
Nhn xung,
khng tp trung
Hi th
Nng va chm
Th nhanh hn va su hn
C bp
C mt
203
Ngi thng ln
Mt
Nhn xung,
khng tp trung
Hi th
Nng va chm
Th nhanh hn va su hn
C bp
C mt
Ban co nhn thy cam xuc cua mnh thay i khng? Chc chn la
co. iu nay co ngha la vao bt c luc nao cn co cam xuc tch cc,
ban co th thay i dang ve iu b mt cach co y thc va nhng
cam xuc tiu cc se tan bin. Ban cang luyn tp vic nay nhiu bao
nhiu, ban cang lam c mt cach t nhin by nhiu.
Xin lu y rng ban ch co th thay i cam xuc cua mnh khi ban
thay i dang ve iu b cua ban 100%. Noi cach khac, nu ban
duy tr dang ve li bing, ban khng th nao cam thy co ng
lc manh me. Mt s ngi bc bach vi ti rng cho du ho lam
g i na, ho dng nh khng th cam thy phn chn ln c.
CHNG 6: B QUY T LA M VI C A T HI U QUA T I A
205
206
207
DANG VE IU B A NNG VA TI U
Cung nh phng phap nay ma ti co th xoay x vit c nm
quyn sach trong luc lch lam vic day c. Cho phep ti chia se
vi ban mt vai kinh nghim vit sach cua mnh. Th thach ln
nht cua vic vit sach la sau chng u tin, ban chc chn se
mt i s hao hng ban u, cam hng trn u mt ch co cam
giac mt moi v qua nhiu vic phai lam.
y la nguyn nhn khin a s tac gia c tr hoan va cui cung
th gat quyn sach vit d sang mt bn, hoc la ho phai mt hang
nm vit xong mt quyn sach. Khng phai luc o ho can kit
y tng, ma ho phai i n luc ho co u cam hng sang tao va
ng lc sang tac.
Con ti th khng co u thi gian xa x ngi i ngun cam
hng ti mt cach t nhin nh vy. Nu ti lam th, quyn sach
nay se khng bao gi c hoan tt va xut ban. Ti se khng bao
gi at ch tiu vit hai quyn sach mt nm, trong khi phai quan
ly ba cng ty va i din thuyt hu nh mi ngay.
Do o, bt c khi nao ti ln lch vit mt chng sach, ti se t
ban thn vao trang thai cam xuc phn khi va sang tao. Ti ly lai
cam xuc o bng cach bt chc dang ve iu b luc ti lam vic
hiu qua nht trong qua kh. Sau khi cam thy tinh thn phn
chn, ti vit khng ngng ngh trong hang gi lin, t ng tun
trao nh sui. Phng phap nay c bit hu ch khi ti phai bt
u vit sach vao luc mt gi sang, sau khi hoan tt bui ao tao
bn rn va cac cng vic trong ngay.
208
209
210
Bc 1
Bc 4
Bc 2
Bc 5
Bc 3
Bc 6
Hay ngh v mt
thi im trong
qua kh khi ban
cam thy rt t tin
Hay ng cach
ng nh luc ban
cam thy rt t tin
Hay iu chnh
hi th nh luc
ban cam thy rt
t tin
Bng cach sao chep chnh xac dang ve iu b luc ban cam thy
t tin, ban se cam thy s T TIN tran ngp trong ngi ban,
giup ban sn sang on nhn bt c th thach nao!
Trong chng sau, ban se c hoc cach tng cng tac ng
va cng cam xuc cua ban hn gp nhiu ln bng cach
iu khin hnh anh tai hin trong tm tr cung luc vi vic m
phong dang ve, iu b cua ban.
211
212
Robbins cho Agassi xem lai oan bng quay cac trn u ma anh chin
thng. ung la trong nhng trn thng ve vang nay, dang ve iu b
cua anh khac hn dang ve hin tai cua anh trn sn. Luc trc, t th
cm vt cua anh khac, anh mt anh nhn khac, nhp th cua anh khac va
cach anh di chuyn cung khac.
Do o, Robbins bao anh quan sat ky va m phong dang ve iu b cua
anh trong qua kh. Ngay lp tc, nhng trn u sau o, Agassi bc
vao sn vi phong thai ma anh tng co. Anh bt u ly lai trang thai
cam xuc ti u va phong thi u tuyt vi luc trc. Sau thang sau,
anh a chin thng trong giai qun vt m rng My va gianh lai ngi
v s mt th gii.
S LIN KT TM TR C TH
Ngay nay, cac bac s va nha tm ly hoc kham pha ra rng tm tr
va c th chung ta kt ni cht che vi nhau thng qua h thn
kinh trung ng, cht che hn ca mc chung ta tng ngh. Kt qua
cua mi lin kt nay la nhn thc va dang ve iu b chung ta tao
thanh mt vong tron iu khin lin mach.
Nhn thc
Cam xuc
Dang ve
iu b
213
214
215
216
217
218
Tro chi ong kch cua tre con chnh la hanh ng m phong
dang ve iu b cua ngi khac
Tht ra, a s chung ta u a mt ln chi tro ong kch thi th
u. Con gai th yu iu trong vai cng chua, c du..., con trai th
um ba la bin thanh bay anh em siu nhn, ngi hung Rambo
hay Tn Ng Khng... tng phn hao hng, bon tre con nhp
vai 100% bng cach n noi, i lai y ht nhn vt mnh ang ong,
s dung nhng vu kh tng tng, thm ch cai trang ging
nhn vt o. o chng qua la phng phap m phong dang ve
iu b cua ngi khac ma chung ta ang ban ti y.
Khi chi tro ong kch hi nho, ban khng nhn ra la mnh ang
m phong m thc thanh cng cua thn tng cua ban. ang tic
thay, nhiu ngi ln lai cho rng y la tro tre con. Do o, mt
trong nhng ky nng t nhin manh me cua chung ta ky nng m
phong trong giai oan th u a khng bao gi c tip tuc phat
trin va tn dung trong cuc sng trng thanh sau nay.
iu ma ho khng bit rng ngay nay, vic s dung ky thut m
phong dang ve iu b nay a giup ti va nhiu ngi thanh
cng khac mai dua, tng cng ky nng trong hu ht moi lnh
vc trong cuc sng ca nhn va ngh nghip.
219
220
221
222
223
224
Bai tp: Hay suy ngh xem! Ban co th m phong ngi nao?
Vy th by gi ti mun ban hay ng nao xem ban co th m
phong ngi nao trong cac lnh vc cuc sng? Ai se la tm gng
cho ban noi theo?
2. Cach ra quyt nh
Hay ngh v mt ngi lun ra nhng quyt nh hiu qua mt cach
t tin.
......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
.......................................................................................................................
225
5. ng lc ca nhn
Ban co th m phong ngi nao trong lnh vc ng lc ca nhn?
Ai lun tran y nhit huyt, di dao nng lng cho du moi ngi
xung quanh trong trang thai tiu cc n mc nao?
......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
.......................................................................................................................
.......................................................................................................................
6. Sc hp dn
Ban nhn thy ai la ng i co da n g ve li cun va thu hut ca nam
ln n?
......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
.......................................................................................................................
.......................................................................................................................
226
B c 1:
B c 2:
B c 3:
227
Tng kt chng
1.
2.
3.
4.
5.
6.
Nhn thc
Cam xuc
Trang thai
c th
228
Hanh
ng
Kt qua
CHNG
229
229
231
233
TNH HUNG 1
y la luc ban cham tran mt vic kho khn ngn ng can li ban at c
muc tiu. V du, ban b ct giam bin ch, khach hang huy bo hp ng, nhn
vin gioi nht cua ban t chc hay san phm cua ban b li trong qua trnh san
xut va ban b khach hang than phin.
Khi ban ung th thach trn con ng i n thanh cng, hay hnh
dung ban thn ban lam tt ca moi vic vt qua no hoc nm bt
nhng c hi mi i chung vi th thach nay. Mt s cu hoi tch cc ma
ban co th t noi vi ban thn (c thoai ni tm):
Nhng cu hoi nay se giup ban hng suy ngh cua mnh vao vic tm
cach giai quyt vn .
234
Hay nh rng nhng g ban tp trung suy ngh quyt nh trang thai cam
xuc va cui cung la hanh ng va kt qua ma ban at c.
235
TNH HUNG 2
y la thi im ban khng at c kt qua mong mun. V du, ban
khng ban c hang, khng at c ch tiu li nhun t ra, bai trn
trong mt cuc thi u, hoc khng c thng quan tin chc.
Bng cach nay, ban se tip tuc cam thy co ng lc, phn khi va se lin
tuc hanh ng cho n khi thanh cng.
i khng!
S nguy him cua vic tp trung vao nhng y ngh tiu cc la ban se
lm vao tm trang au bun, t trach mnh n ni phai bo cuc.
Bng cach nay, ban se tip tuc tm thy ng lc, tr nn phn khi
va se lin tuc hanh ng cho n khi thanh cng.
TNH HUNG 3
y la luc ban i mt vi mt nhim vu hay mt d an gian nan th thach.
V du, vit mt ban bao cao phc tap, thuyt trnh trc am ng, thanh lp
cng ty, i phong vn hay chao ban mt san phm. Tt ca chung ta u gp
phai nhng nhim vu d khin ta nan ch mi ngay. o la luc ban cn trc
tip giai quyt vn ngay cang tin b hn va at kt qua tt hn. Khi
lin tip vt qua tr ngai mt cach thanh cng, ban se t tin hn va bt
u nhn ra c tim nng ban thn.
Vy th ban nn iu khin tm tr tp trung vao nhng vic g trong tnh
hung nay?
236
Nu ban phai bc ln thuyt trnh, hay hnh dung ban thn ban ng
noi trc am ng tht tt va sng ng. Hay mng tng, ban nhn
c s hng ng nng nhit t pha khan gia. Cam giac cua ban nh
th nao khi nghe ting v tay nhit lit? Hay cam nhn s phn khi va
y kh th khi lam vic nay. Hay t nhu hay t ra nhng cu hoi tch
cc nh...
l Mnh khng th nao i thm giy phut nao na. Vic nay tht thu v
qua i!
l Lam th nao ti lam vic hiu qua?
l Lam sao ti cam thy thch thu vi cng vic nay?
Khi tai hin nhng th thach trong tm tr ban bng cach nay, ban t t
ban thn ban vao trang thai cam xuc tt nht hoan tt nhim vu.
237
239
THNH GIAC
Ban nghe thy m thanh g?
Hng m thanh t u ti?
n m sc hay a m sc?
m lng nho
m lng ln?
m vc thp
m vc cao?
Chm
Nhanh?
CAM NHN
V tr cam giac cua ban u?
Hnh dang g?
Kch c th nao? Nho
Ln?
Tnh hay ng?
Hng di chuyn ra sao?
Nhe
Nng?
DI GOC NHN CUA BAN HAY DI GOC NHN CUA NGI KHAC
Hnh anh trong tm tr ban co th c th hin di hai goc : di
goc nhn cua ban hay di goc nhn cua ngi khac. Ti mun ban
hay nhm mt lai mt chut va ngh n mt dp vui nao o cua ban
trong qua kh mt ky i bin ngh mat vi gia nh, mt ba tic
sinh nht hay luc ban c tng lng, v.v...
Khi ngh v dp vui nay, hay y xem ban thy cac chi tit, trong
tm tr di goc nhn cua ban (tc la ban trong c th ban va
nhn thy moi vic xung quanh qua i mt cua ban) hay di
goc nhn cua ngi khac (tc la ban nhn thy ban thn ban t
ng xa).
242
Trong s ngi quen cua ban, co ai luc nao cung bun ba khng?
Nhng chuyn bun xay ra rt lu ri vn khin ho au kh mai
n gi.
Mt khach hang n cua ti tm s vi ti rng, cuc sng cua
ch y ry nhng kh au. Ch va khoc va k cho ti nghe v
nhng chuyn bun cua ch mt cach rt au n. Ti phat hin
ra rng ch co khuynh hng nhn thy nhng ky c au bun
244
245
246
................................................
................................................
................................................
................................................
................................................
................................................
................................................
................................................
................................................
THNH GIAC
Ban nghe thy m thanh g?
Hng m thanh t u ti?
n m sc hay a m sc?
m lng ln?
m lng nho
m vc cao?
m vc thp
Nhanh?
Chm
................................................
................................................
................................................
................................................
................................................
................................................
................................................
................................................
................................................
................................................
................................................
................................................
CAM NHN
V tr cam giac cua ban u?
Hnh dang g?
Ln?
Kch c nh th nao? Nho
Tnh hay ng?
Hng di chuyn la g?
Nng?
Nhe
Cng t 1 n 10
................................................
................................................
................................................
................................................
................................................
................................................
................................................
247
THNH GIAC
Ban nghe thy m thanh g?
Hng m thanh t u ti?
n m sc hay a m sc?
m lng ln?
m lng nho
m vc cao?
m vc thp
Nhanh?
Chm
Ting r ga cua xe hi
Pha trc
m thanh n sc
Trung bnh
Trung bnh
Trung bnh
Ta la sp
Bn tai phai
m thanh n sc
Trung bnh
m vc thp
Trung bnh
CAM NHN
V tr cam giac cua ban u?
Hnh dang g?
Ln?
Kch c nh th nao? Nho
Tnh hay ng?
Hng di chuyn la g?
Nng?
Nhe
Cng t 1 n 10
248
lng ngc
Tron
C mt trai chanh
ng yn
Khng co
Nhe
5
Tht thu v khi kham pha cach thc nao b lp trnh v muc tiu
cua ban trong tm tr ung khng nao? By gi, ti mun ban hay
th nghim vic chuyn i cac giac quan ni tai trong tm tr, tng
cai mt va quan sat ngun ng lc trong ban thay i ra sao.
Muc tiu cua bai tp nay la tng mc phn khi cua ban ln
10. Tai sao phai th? nhng suy ngh v muc tiu thuc y ban
hanh ng ngay tc th.
Noi chung, vic chuyn i cac giac quan ni tai t trai qua phai
trong danh sach trn se lam tng cng cam xuc cua ban. V
du, vic chuyn t mau trng en sang u mau sc hay t
ti sang sang se giup tng cng cam xuc cua ban. (Tuy
nhin, vn co mt s ngoai l. V du, co trang thai th gian, vic
chuyn t ti sang sang co th khin ban giam cam giac th
gian. Trong trng hp nay, ban nn lam ngc lai).
249
Sang.
Gn cung th.
250
Di goc nhn
cua ngi khac
Chuyn ng
nh mt b phim
Trung bnh
Phn tan
Ti
Trng en
Gn
ong khung
Hi lch sang mt bn
Di goc nhn
cua ban
(gi nguyn)
Tng kch c gp i
Tp trung
Sang
u mau sc
Keo lai gn hn
Toan canh
Keo v trung tm
THNH GIAC
Ban nghe thy m thanh g?
Hng m thanh t u ti?
n m sc
hay a m sc?
m lng nho
m lng ln?
m vc cao?
m vc thp
Nhanh?
Chm
Ting r ga cua xe hi
Pha trc
n m sc
Trung bnh
Trung bnh
Trung bnh
(gi nguyn)
Xung quanh
a m sc
Ta la sp
Bn tai phai
n m sc
Trung bnh
m vc thp
Trung bnh
Ta la sp
Xung quanh
a m sc
To hn
(gi nguyn)
Nhanh hn
lng ngc
Tron
C mt trai chanh
(gi nguyn)
(gi nguyn)
C trai banh bong r
ng yn
Khng co
Nhe
5
Tao s chuyn ng
Hng ra ngoai
Tng trong lng ln
9 - 10
Tng m lng ln hn
(gi nguyn)
Lam cho nhanh hn
CAM NHN
V tr cam giac cua ban u?
Hnh dang g?
Kch c nh th nao?
Nho
Ln?
Tnh hay ng?
Hng di chuyn la g?
Nhe
Nng?
Cng t 1 n 10
251
Ban se bt u nhn thy vic thay i cac giac quan ni tai cung
khng co g mi la. Tng t nh vic thay i dang ve iu b,
tt ca chung ta u a trai qua vic iu khin giac quan ni
tai ma khng h bit. Mt ln na, vn la nhiu ngi trong
chung ta lam vic nay mt cach v thc va khng phai luc nao
vic nay cung mang lai kt qua tt ep cho ho.
Mt s ngi co thoi quen tr nn phn khi qua mc v mt vic
g o bng cach chuyn i cac giac quan ni tai cua ho. Vic nay
i khi lam hai ho, v du nh khin ho khng cng lai c cam
giac them n kem mc du ho bit ro mnh cn tranh xa nhng loai
thc n giau nng lng.
Ban u, ho co th kim ch c cam giac them n. Nhng sau o,
khi ngh v cy kem cang luc cang nhiu, ho bt u tng tng
canh mnh ang n kem (hnh anh c th hin di goc nhn cua
ho va chuyn ng nh mt b phim), ho keo hnh anh gn lai va
phong to ra. Tip n, ho tng tng v ngot lm va mat lanh trn
li (cam nhn), ho nghe thy ting mut kem chun chut (m thanh)
va ho ku ln rng, Chu cha... Ngon qua!. Ho lam vic nay cho n
khi cam giac them n tng n ho khng th chu c na. Th
la ho nhay dng ln va chay ngay ra quy ban kem.
y cung chnh la mc ng lc thuc y ma nhng ngi
thanh cng tao ra khi ho ngh v muc tiu ca nhn cua ho. Ban hay
tng tng n luc ban co th ap dung ky thut nay vao vic at
muc tiu cua ban, nh m cng ty hay bt tay vao mt d an y
cam go, th kt qua ma ban gt hai se nh th nao?
CHNG 7: I U KHI N NA O B CU A BA N A T K T QUA T I U
253
THNH GIAC
Ban nghe thy m thanh g?
Hng m thanh t u ti?
n m sc hay a m sc?
m lng ln?
m lng nho
m vc cao?
m vc thp
Nhanh?
Chm
i khng!
Bn tai phai
m thanh n sc
Trung bnh
m vc thp
Trung bnh
CAM NHN
V tr cam giac cua ban u?
Hnh dang g?
Ln?
Kch c nh th nao? Nho
Tnh hay ng?
Hng di chuyn la g?
Nng?
Nhe
Cng t 1 n 10
lng ngc
Hnh vung
Rt ln
Chuyn ng
i xung
Nng
8
255
256
Di goc nhn
cua ban
Chuyn ng
nh mt b phim
Ln
Tp trung
Sang
u mau sc
Gn
ong khung
trung tm
Di goc nhn
cua ngi khac
Hnh anh ng yn
Nho
Phn tan
Ti
Trng en
Xa
(gi nguyn)
goc phai pha di cung
THNH GIAC
Ban nghe thy m thanh g?
Hng m thanh t u ti?
n m sc
hay a m sc?
m lng nho
m lng ln?
m vc thp
m vc cao?
Chm
Nhanh?
i khng!
Bn tai phai
m thanh
n iu
Trung bnh
m vc thp
Trung bnh
Rt nho
m vc cc cao
Rt chm
lng ngc
Hnh vung
Rt ln
Chuyn ng
i xung
Nng
8
Bn tai trai
(gi nguyn)
CAM NHN
V tr cam giac cua ban u?
Hnh dang g?
Kch c nh th nao? Nho
Ln?
Tnh hay ng?
Hng di chuyn la g?
Nhe
Nng?
Cng t 1 n 10
* Hay lu y rng ban cn khng chuyn i mt s giac quan ni tai (gi nguyn).
V du, khi hnh anh th giac a c ong khung, tc la no a b giam cng . Ban khng
cn chuyn no sang toan canh, vic nay ch khin cam giac au bun tng thm ma thi.
257
258
AP DUNG CNG THC CUA CAM XUC: CHUYN I GIA CAC CAM XUC
Trong chng v dang ve iu b, chung ta a bit rng mi cam
xuc cua chung ta co mt dang ve iu b ring bit gn lin vi
no. Tng t, nao b cua chung ta cung co khuynh hng th
hin tng cam xuc khac nhau trong tm tr mi ngi.
Nu ban cam thy phn khi mun lam mt vic, o la v cac
giac quan ni tai cua ban c sp xp theo mt cach nht nh.
Ngc lai, khi ban ri vao trang thai li bing va mun tr hoan
cng vic, cac giac quan ni tai cua ban se c th hin theo mt
kiu khac.
Vy chuyn g se xay ra nu trong luc cam thy li bing, ban
chuyn i cac giac quan ni tai cua ban sang trang thai hng hai?
Ban se lp tc cam thy co ng lc lam ung cai cng vic ma
ban va cam thy li va khng mun lam.
259
260
THNH GIAC
Ban nghe thy m thanh g?
Hng m thanh t u ti?
n m sc hay a m sc?
m lng ln?
m lng nho
m vc cao?
m vc thp
Nhanh?
Chm
Khng co
Khng co
Khng co
Khng co
Khng co
Khng co
Mnh co cn phai
lam vic nay by gi khng?
Bn tai phai
m thanh n sc
Trung bnh
m vc thp
(giong nghe rt nham chan)
Chm
CAM NHN
V tr cam giac cua ban la u?
Hnh dang g?
Ln?
Kch c nh th nao? Nho
Tnh hay ng?
Hng di chuyn la g?
Nng?
Nhe
Cng t 1 n 10
chn tay
Hnh vung
Ln
Chuyn ng
i xung
Nng
2
261
262
Khng co
Khng co
Khng co
Khng co
Khng co
Khng co
CAM NHN
V tr cam giac cua ban la u?
Hnh dang g?
Ln?
Kch c nh th nao? Nho
Tnh hay ng?
Hng di chuyn la g?
Nng?
Nhe
Cng t 1 n 10
lng ngc
Hnh tron
Rt ln
Chuyn ng
i ln
Nhe
9
263
B c 3. Lu y nh n g i m kha c bi t
By gi, ban hay nhn lai va so sanh cac giac quan ni tai cua trang thai
Li Bing va trang thai Hng Hai. Hay lu y nhng im khac nhau
cua cac giac quan ni tai trong hai trang thai cam xuc nay. Trong tm
tr ban, chnh nhng im nay khin ban cam nhn c khac bit
trong hai s vic trn. o la cach tm tr ban phn bit gia nhng vic
thuc y ban hanh ng vi nhng vic khng thuc y ban. Cung xin
lu y rng nu ban gp mt m ta giac quan ni tai ging nhau, v du:
ca hai hnh anh u ti, ban nn kim lai xem hnh anh nao sang hn
hnh anh con lai. iu quan trong ma ban cn nh la cac giac quan ni
tai cua mi ngi th hin khng ging nhau.
TRANG THAI
LI BING
(Hoan tt d an)
TRANG THAI
HNG HAI
(i lt van)
TH GIAC
Goc nhn cua ban
hay Goc nhn cua ngi khac?
Hnh anh Tnh hay ng?
Ln?
Nho
Phn tan
Tp trung?
Ti
Sang?
Trng en hay u mau sc?
Xa
Gn?
ong khung hay Toan canh?
V tr hnh anh?
Goc nhn
cua ngi khac
Chuyn ng
nh mt b phim
Nho
Tp trung
Ti
Trng en
Gn
ong khung
Hi lch khoi trung tm
Goc nhn
cua ban
Chuyn ng
nh mt b phim
Ln hn
Tp trung
Sang hn
u mau sc
Gn hn
Toan canh
trung tm
Khng co
Khng co
Khng co
Khng co
Khng co
Khng co
Khng co
Khng co
Khng co
Khng co
Khng co
Khng co
THNH GIAC
Ban nghe thy m thanh g?
Hng m thanh t u ti?
n m sc hay a m sc?
m lng nho
m lng ln?
m vc thp
m vc cao?
Chm
Nhanh?
GIONG NOI THM
Ban t noi g
vi ban thn?
Hng m thanh t u ti?
n m sc hay a m sc?
m lng nho
m lng ln?
m vc thp
m vc cao?
Chm
Nhanh?
264
Bn tai phai
m thanh n sc
To
m vc cao
(giong nghe rt hao hng)
Nhanh hn
chn tay
Hnh vung
Ln
Chuyn ng
i xung
Nng
lng ngc
Hnh tron
Rt ln
Chuyn ng
i ln
Nhe
Trang thai
Hng Hai
(Hoan tt d an)
(i lt van)
Trang thai
Li Bing
(Hoan tt d an)
265
(Hoan tt d an)
TH GIAC
Goc nhn cua ban
hay Goc nhn cua ngi khac?
Hnh anh Tnh hay ng?
Ln?
Nho
Tp trung?
Phn tan
Sang?
Ti
Trng en hay u mau sc?
Gn?
Xa
ong khung hay Toan canh?
V tr hnh anh?
THNH GIAC
Ban nghe thy m thanh g?
Hng m thanh t u ti?
n m sc hay a m sc?
m ?
m lng nho
m vc cao?
m vc thp
Nhanh?
Chm
266
Khng co
Khng co
Khng co
Khng co
Khng co
Khng co
CAM NHN
V tr cam giac cua ban la u?
Hnh dang g?
Ln?
Kch c nh th nao? Nho
Tnh hay ng?
Hng di chuyn la g?
Nng?
Nhe
lng ngc
Hnh tron
Rt ln
Chuyn ng
i ln
Nhe
Bc 5. Th nghim
Hay quan sat xem ban tr nn hao hng nh th nao khi ban ngh
v vic hoan tt d an, sau khi ban a ap dung ban thit k cua
trang thai Hng Hai.
267
THNH GIAC
Ban nghe thy m thanh g?
Hng m thanh t u ti?
n m sc hay a m sc?
m lng ln?
m lng nho
m vc cao?
m vc thp
Nhanh?
Chm
Khng co
Khng co
Khng co
Khng co
Khng co
Khng co
Ngon tuyt!
Bn tai phai
a m sc
Trung bnh
m vc thp
Chm
269
Ngon va m a
Mm, day va rt ngon
Ging mui tht nng, thm lng
m
ming
270
THNH GIAC
Ban nghe thy m thanh g?
Hng m thanh t u ti?
n m sc hay a m sc?
m lng ln?
m lng nho
m vc cao?
m vc thp
Nhanh?
Chm
Khng co
Khng co
Khng co
Khng co
Khng co
Khng co
Tm qua!
Bn tai phai
a m sc
To
m vc cao
Nhanh
CAM NHN
Mon n o co v nh th nao?
Ming gan o nh th nao?
Mui cua no nh th nao?
Nhit nh th nao?
V tr cam giac cua ban u?
271
GHET
(gan heo)
TH GIAC
Di goc nhn cua ban
hay Di goc nhn cua ngi khac?
Hnh anh ng yn
hay Chuyn ng?
Ln?
Nho
Tp trung?
Phn tan
Sang?
Ti
Trng en hay u mau sc?
Gn?
Xa
ong khung hay Toan canh?
V tr hnh anh?
Di goc nhn
cua ban
Chuyn ng
nh mt b phim
Ln
Tp trung
Sang
u mau sc
Gn
Toan canh
trung tm
Di goc nhn
cua ban
Chuyn ng
nh mt b phim
Ln
Khng co
Khng co
Khng co
Khng co
Khng co
Khng co
Khng co
Khng co
Khng co
Khng co
Khng co
Khng co
Ngon tuyt!
Bn tai phai
a m sc
Trung bnh
m vc thp
Chm
Tm qua!
Bn tai phai
a m sc
To
m vc cao
Nhanh
Sang
Trng en
Xa hn
ong khung
trung tm
THNH GIAC
Ban nghe thy m thanh g?
Hng m thanh t u ti?
n m sc hay a m sc?
m lng nho
m lng ln?
m vc cao?
m vc thp
Nhanh?
Chm
CAM NHN
Ngon va m a
Mon n o co v nh th nao?
va mn
Ming tht boming gan o nh th nao? Mm, day va rt ngon
Mui cua no
Ging mui tht nng,
nh th nao?
thm lng
Nhit nh th nao?
m
V tr cam giac cua ban u?
ming
272
Bc 4. Mang nhng giac quan ni tai cua cam giac ghet vao
nhng mon n ma ban thch
Hay ngh v mon n ma ban yu thch mt ln na va tng tng
canh ban ang n no. Tuy nhin, hay dung cac giac quan ni tai
cua cam giac ghet vao mon n nay.
u tin, hay tng tng ban thn ban ang sn sang n ming
tht bo bt tt thm ngon. Hay chuyn hnh anh u mau sc
thanh mau trng en. Sau o, hay ong khung hnh anh lai va
y no ra xa. Mc them n cua ban a giam xung cha?
Tip n, hay tng tng ming tht bo co v tanh nh tht sng
va mui hng cay nh gan heo. By gi, hay a ming tht bo vao
ming nhai, y n v mn, tanh nh tht sng, ming tht mong
va dnh nhp nhap va mui v y ht mt ming gan heo. K tip, hay
t noi vi ban thn, Tm qua! vi giong iu ln va m vc cao.
Cam giac nh li ban mun nhn ra khi ming gan heo sng tri
tut xung c hong ban.
n luc nay, ch cn ngh n ming tht bo bt tt se cho ban cam
giac ni da ga nh ming gan heo. By gi ban con mun n
mon bo bt tt na khng?
Bc 5. Th nghim
Muc ch cua bai tp nay khng phai la ban khng bao gi n
mon tht bo bt tt na, ma la nhm giup ban giam hay han ch
cam giac them n. Va ln ti khi ban nhn thy mon n o, ban co
th t chi khng n nu cn thit.
Ky thut nay cc ky hiu nghim trong vic giup cac hoc vin
cua ti kim ch nhng thoi quen n ung xu. Trong qua kh,
ho phai ap dung ky lut vi ban thn khng n qua mc, ngay
273
274
275
276
277
278
279
281
HNH A N H THUC Y
283
284
285
Tng kt chng
1.
2.
3.
4.
5.
6.
Hnh anh tai hin trong tm tr la cach ban nhn thc v nhng
g xay ra xung quanh. o chnh la nhng suy ngh va cach ngh
cua ban v mi trng xung quanh.
Ban phai kim soat SUY NGH cua ban bng cach tp trung vao
nhng hnh anh va m thanh khin ban hng ti phng an giai
quyt tch cc.
Ban co th iu khin CACH THC suy ngh cua ban v mt s
vic bng cach s dung cac giac quan ni tai.
Cac giac quan ni tai ging nh ban phm cua nao b. Mi
trang thai cam xuc u co cac giac quan ni tai ring bit gn
lin vi no.
Ban co th s dung cac giac quan ni tai :
l Tng cng tac ng cua mt s vic tch cc
l Giam thiu tac ng cua mt s vic tiu cc
l Thay i cam nhn cua ban v mt s vic bng cach ap dung
cng thc cua cam xuc
Ky Thut Xuyn Tac c dung trung hoa mt s vic tiu cc
a. Ngh v mt s vic ti t khin ban bun phin hay kho chu
b. Quay lai s vic o trong tm tr nh mt b phim t u n cui
c. Quay lui ri quay ti b phim o vi tc nhanh gp ba ln
tc bnh thng. Bop meo cac giac quan ni tai moi th
tr nn hai hc thm ch nc ci.
d. Lp lai qua trnh nay 5-8 ln
e. Th nghim. Ngh v s vic o ln na. Ban cam thy th nao?
M Thc Vut Nhanh c dung thay i thoi quen xu va
hnh thanh thoi quen tt
a. Xac nh thoi quen xu cn c thay i
b. Xac nh YU T THUC Y dn n thoi quen xu o. Tao
ra HNH ANH THUC Y
c. Xac nh TRANG THAI/HANH VI MONG MUN thay
th thoi quen xu. Tao ra HNH ANH MONG MUN
d. y HNH ANH THUC Y ra xa va keo HNH ANH MONG
MUN lai gn vi TC CAO va m thanh Whoosh
e. Lp lai qua trnh nay 10-15 ln
f. Th nghim bng cach tng tng v tng lai
CHNG
287
287
NEO CA M XU C
289
NEO M THANH
Mt dang tac nhn kch thch/neo cam xuc khac ma ban trai
nghim la neo m thanh. Neo m thanh la m thanh c lin kt
thn kinh vi mt trang thai cam xuc ring bit. V du, ting coi xe
canh sat vang ln se khin nhiu ngi cam thy s hai.
Th con giong noi con ngi th sao? Chc hn ban se cam thy
kho chu khi nghe giong noi choi tai cua ngi bn canh. Con
giong iu m ai nho nhe cua c ban gai lai khin ban cam thy
v cung d chu, co ung th khng?
Tt ca nhng neo m thanh (tiu cc hay tch cc) nay a c cai t
t nhng trai nghim cam xuc cua ban trong qua kh. m nhac la
290
291
292
293
NEO CAM XUC ANH HNG N CUC SNG CUA BAN NH TH NAO
Ban co bao gi thc mc tai sao Nike lai tra cho nhng ngi sao
trong lang th thao hang triu ch ho mc nhng b qun
ao co logo Nike khng? Nike lam vy bi ho hiu ro sc manh v
bin cua neo cam xuc. Nm ngoai, Nike a ky hp ng quang
cao 5 nm tr gia 100 triu la vi Tiger Woods ch anh i
non va mang nhng phu kin co logo Nike. Ho qua d tin va
in r chng? Khng h. Ho tha bit rng khi khan gia xem
Tiger Woods thi u, ho se va trong trang thai phn khch cc
va nhn thy logo Nike. Tng t, khi khan gia xem Jordan
thi u, ho cung co cam giac tuyt vi va p vao mt ho la logo
Nike. Chc chn t o, logo Nike se mang lai cho moi ngi cam
xuc tch cc. Tt ca nhng trang thai manh me, phn khch, t tin
u a c neo vao hnh anh logo Nike.
Cui cung, muc ch ma Nike hng ti la neo cam xuc nay co th
khin ngi khac bo ra hang trm la mua nhng i giay
Jordan, hoc s hu nhng chic non va ao anh gn Tiger
Woods. Tai sao vy? Bi v nhng san phm nay mang lai cho
khach hang cam giac tuyt nh khi ho mc vao ngi.
294
295
Bc 2. cng cam xuc cao nht, hay thc hin neo cam xuc
Mt khi ban cam nhn c ban ang mc cam xuc cao nht
(thang im 10), hay thc hin neo cam xuc cua mnh. Loai neo
cam xuc tt nht la s phi hp gia neo m thanh va neo cam
nhn. V du, ban co th gi cao nm m ln tri va het ln c!
(hoc Tuyt vi!). Ban cung co th v tay hoc bung tay.
297
Yu t 1: Cng
Yu t u tin la cng cam xuc. Neo cam xuc ch nn c
thc hin khi cam xuc cua ban at n nh im cao nht. Tht s,
nu cng cam xuc cua ban ln n mc u cao, neo cam xuc
se c cai t thanh cng ngay trong ln u tin. Con v du nh
ban ch mi cam thy hi hi co ng lc, neo cam xuc se khng co
tac dung.
299
Yu t 2: Thi im
Yu t quan trong th hai la thi im thc hin neo cam xuc. Neo
cam xuc phai c thc hin gn ngng cao nht cua cam xuc
khi no ang trn a tng dn. Ly do la khi ban th nghim lai neo
cam xuc, ban se co c cam xuc tng dn. Nu trong luc luyn
tp, ban thc hin neo cam xuc ngay tai nh cao trao, th co kha
nng neo cam xuc se c gn vao luc cam xuc ang i xung cua
ban, do o khng at hiu qua ti a. Ban cung nn duy tr neo
cam xuc cua mnh khoang vai giy trc khi ngng lai.
CNG
THI GIAN
Yu t 3: Tnh c nht
Yu t th ba la tnh c nht cua neo cam xuc ma ban thc hin.
Ban phai chon mt neo cam xuc c nht v nh. Nn nh la neo
cam xuc cua ban co th la neo hnh anh, neo m thanh, neo cam
nhn hoc kt hp ca ba loai. V du, ban co th nhn thy mt hnh
anh nao o, ng thi t noi mt cu g o va lam mt hanh ng
g o. Ca ba hanh ng nay phai c thc hin cung luc.
300
Yu t 4: S lp lai
Yu t th t la s lp i lp lai neo cam xuc. cai t neo cam
xuc thanh cng, ban phai thc hin neo cam xuc vai ln mt cach
chnh xac tuyt i. V du, nu neo cam xuc cua ban la ng tac
cham vai, ban phai cham vao ung v tr o, vi cung mt lc o
khng hn khng kem. Nu neo cam xuc cua ban la mt cu ban t
noi vi ban thn, ban phai lp lai chnh xac tng ch mt cua cu
noi o.
301
1..........................................................................................................
2...........................................................................................................
3...........................................................................................................
4...........................................................................................................
5...........................................................................................................
Khi ban a vit ra u nm cam xuc, hay ln lt thc hin bn
bc trn tao neo cam xuc cho cac cam xuc nay. Hay chon
nhng neo cam xuc c trng khac nhau cho tng cam xuc ma
ban mun s hu.
303
1..........................................................................................................
2...........................................................................................................
3...........................................................................................................
4...........................................................................................................
5...........................................................................................................
Khi a xac nh c nhng neo cam xuc tiu cc cua mnh, ban
co th s dung quy trnh 7 bc sau y loai bo va thay th cac
neo cam xuc nay.
304
Bc 4. Thc hin neo cam xuc tiu cc va neo cam xuc tch cc
cung luc cho n luc at n nh im hoan tt qua trnh
loai bo va thay th
loai bo neo cam xuc tiu cc, ban cn thc hin ca neo cam xuc
tch cc va neo cam xuc tiu cc cung luc. V du, ban hay bung tay
va het ln c! khi nhn thy in thoai trong cng ty. Khi ca
cam xuc tiu cc ln tch cc u c kch hoat, cam xuc tch cc
(do manh hn rt nhiu) se ln at cam xuc tiu cc.
CHNG 8: NEO CA M XU C : C N I U KHI N CA M XU C CU A BA N
305
Bc 6. Tip tuc duy tr neo cam xuc tch cc trong vong 5 giy
ri ngng
Ban hay tip tuc kch hoat nhng cam xuc tch cc bng cach lin
tuc bung tay va het ln c! trong vong 5 giy.
Bc 7. Th nghim
Cui cung, ban co th th nghim kt qua cua qua trnh nay. By
gi ban hay nhn vao cai in thoai trn ban lam vic, cam giac lo
lng s hai cua ban a bin mt, ung khng? Thay vao o la cam
giac vui ve, hng phn va t tin.
Virginia Satir cung s dung phng phap loai bo neo cam xuc tiu cc
nay giup cho cac cp v chng ran nt tnh cam quay lai vi nhau.
Trc o, mi ln ngi chng hoc ngi v (a can kit tnh cam)
nhn thy mt nhau (neo hnh anh) th cam giac cm ghet, gin d va
tht vong lai tri dy trong long ho. Virginia bng cach tao ra neo
cam xuc cho cac cam xuc tch cc nh yu thng, vui ve,
hanh phuc va nng nhit a giup loai bo nhng cam xuc tiu
cc gia hai v chng. Vi neo cam xuc tch cc mi c thay th
nay, mi ln nhn thy nhau, ho lai cam thy yu nhau nng nan
nh ngay u gp g.
306
Tng kt chng
1.
2.
3.
5.
f. Th nghim
307
CHNG
309
TM Y NGHA TCH CC
CUA S VIC
Y ngha ma ti chon cho mt s vic chnh la y ngha ma ti
tao ra. Adam Khoo
309
311
312
Co mt cu vng trong mi am my en
iu nay c bit n nh nh lut v phn cc. H co
phng Bc th bao gi cung co phng Nam. H co hnh thc
bn ngoai th t co ni dung bn trong. Nu co khung hoang
th tt se co c hi, va pham a co u th phai co ui. Nu
co ch lom th phai co ch li. Khi mt cai g cht i hn se co
mt cai mi bt u. o cung la le tun hoan cua vu tru vy.
Y ngha ma ban chon gan vao mt s vic la y ngha do ban
tao ra. Khi ban din dch mt kinh nghim la tiu cc hay ti t,
ban se t t mnh vao tnh trang khn kh dn n nhng hanh
ng t hai (thm ch ca vic chng lam g cung la mt dang hanh
ng tiu cc) va gy ra hu qua xu. Ngc lai, nu ban danh
cho mt s vic nao o y ngha tch cc, ban se trong v th kha
quan, co nhng hanh ng tch cc, va tng bc tao ra kt qua
tt ep n khng ng.
iu nay co th tng kt trong cng thc di y:
313
314
Trong khi o, cung co khng thiu nhng ngi sinh ra trong cac
gia nh giau sang, quyn lc, ho c trao cho khng bit bao
nhiu la li th, c hi nhng lai khng bit bin nhng li th o
thanh b phong cho mnh. Thm ch, nhiu ngi trong s ho a
i n ch huy hoai cuc i mnh.
Andrew Luster t ke tha k giau co n ti pham hip dm
V du tiu biu nht v trng hp nay la Andrew Luster, 39 tui,
ngi tha k ch my phm ni ting, Max Factor, mi y a b
kt ti ham hip phu n.
Luster la cht ni cua nha tai phit huyn thoai Hollywood, ng chu cua
ch my phm Max Factor, ngi a tao dng nn ch cua mnh
kinh in anh th gii t u thp k 20 th k trc. Sau khi tha
k, Luster sng da vao tai san khng l co gia tr c tnh vao khoang
31 triu My. Ngi nha cua ng ta nm bai bin Malibu thuc Los
Angeles, ni ch danh cho gii thng lu. Thay v chm lo cho vic kinh
doanh va gia tai c tha hng, Luster ti ngay hoang ang nh mt
tay chi th thit trn bai bin, vi nhng cuc vui va tic tung bt tn.
Luster cung hoc ai hoc nhng bo d gia chng. Sau o, ng ta mua
mt ngi nha ven bin gn Santa Barbara, va tip tuc thang ngay du
h vi nhng thu vui ngng cung.
Con ngi sa oa nay a t quay phim canh mnh lam tnh vi nhng
phu n ro rang la ang mt ht kim soat. Chnh nhng cun bng
nay la tang chng kt ti ng ta a ham hip khng phai mt ma rt
nhiu phu n.
Cui cung, th Luster phai tan ta trong nha tu mt kt cuc y bi tham
cho mt cuc i c bt u vi bao nhiu ha hen nh th.
315
316
317
318
319
320
321
322
323
324
325
326
327
................................................................................................................
................................................................................................................
................................................................................................................
8.
................................................................................................................
................................................................................................................
................................................................................................................
9.
................................................................................................................
................................................................................................................
................................................................................................................
10. Sau quyt nh giam lng, mt s nhn vin a ri khoi cng
ty ti.
................................................................................................................
................................................................................................................
................................................................................................................
328
Ti xut thn t
mt gia nh ngheo.
Ti khng c hoc
hanh t t.
Ngi yu ti a
bo ri ti.
Nh vy ban co th tm c mt ngi
xng ang hn.
Ti va b cho v vn
sau 20 nm cng hin cho
cng ty.
Sp c chiu tng
ti sut
10
329
1......................................................................................................................
2......................................................................................................................
3......................................................................................................................
4......................................................................................................................
5......................................................................................................................
6......................................................................................................................
7......................................................................................................................
8......................................................................................................................
9......................................................................................................................
10.....................................................................................................................
330
331
KHA NNG CHUYN HOA Y NGHA KINH NGHIM CUA NGI KHAC
THT S LA MT CNG CU HU CH
Kha nng chuyn hoa y ngha kinh nghim cua ngi khac la mt
trong nhng cng cu hu ch nht ma ti tng s dung. Xin ban hay
nh rng, bt c thi im nao, mi ngi khac nhau se co cach
nhn nhn khac nhau v cung mt s vic xay ra xung quanh ho. o
la ly do tai sao mi ngi co nhng phan ng khac nhau, va v th
a ra nhng quyt nh khac nhau v cung mt vn .
Nu co ngi phu nhn xut cua ban th cung co nhng ngi
chp nhn no. Mt s ng nghip cua ban vn cam thy di dao
nhit huyt khi nn kinh t xung dc trong khi nhng ngi khac
lai cam thy chan nan mt tinh thn. Chng phai la mt cng cu
manh me sao nu ban co th thay i cach ngh cua nhng ngi
xung quanh ban? Nh vy, ban se co th giup c nhiu ngi
co cach suy ngh tch cc hn va hanh ng hiu qua hn!
Cac nha din gia tai nng bit cach gan bt c y ngha nao ma ho
mun c toa nhn thy trong mt s vic nao o. Mt v lanh ao
gioi la ngi bao gi cung ap t c cach ngh cua mnh hoc
a ra nh ngha v cac s vic ngi khac noi theo. Cac chnh
tr gia li lac, nhng Tng giam c tai ba, nhng ngi ban hang
gioi giang va cac nha giao duc v ai u dung n ky thut nay
hang ngay mt cach t nhin khin ngi khac thay i li suy
ngh quen thuc cua ho.
V phn mnh, ti a dung n ky thut nay trong nhiu lnh vc
nhm giai quyt nhng vn nay sinh trong cuc sng, kinh
doanh va cng vic, nht la khi ti gp phai s khang c hay t
chi.
332
333
335
QUANG CAO: CHUYN HOA CACH NGH CUA HANG TRIU NGI
iu lam ti thch nht v quang cao la no chuyn hoa y ngha
mt mc ln. V cn ban, thng qua quang cao, ban bin i
nhn thc va thay i y ngha ma ngi i gan cho cng ty va
san phm cua ban.
Th ban a nghe noi n Hertz, mt cng ty cho thu xe hi cha?
o la cng ty dn u th trng trong dch vu cho thu xe hi
My. K n la cng ty Avis. Khi Avis mun m man mt chin
dch quang cao rm r hoanh trang, ho t ra cu hoi, Ta phai lam
cach g chuyn tai thng ip rng, vic chung ta ng th hai trn
th trng tht s mang lai li ch cho khach hang?.
Th la ho khi xng mt chin dch vi chu , Avis... bi v chung
ti ng th hai, chung ti se c gng hn phuc vu cac ban. Ho bin
i y ngha cua vic ng th hai vi thng ip rng ho se i xa
hn i thu lam ep long khach hang. Kt qua ? Sau o, doanh
thu va th phn cua ho a gia tng mt cach ang k.
Vic Pepsi a lam trong chin dch quang cao chng lai ch thu
keo trn cua ho la Coke cho ta thy mt v du tiu biu khac.
Pepsi bit rng ho khng lao lang bng i thu, v th ho tm
cach bin vic Pepsi sinh sau e mun thanh mt li th. Cung
luc o, ho mun tung chiu khin cho yu t lu i cua Coke la
iu bt li. Th la ho ngh ra mt chiu tip th vi khu hiu,
Pepsi S la chon cua th h mi!. Sau o, ho s dung dong
nhac tre cua cac ngh s nh Britney Spears va Robbie Williams
truyn tai s chuyn bin y ngha nay. Kt qua, Pepsi nhanh
chong chim c tnh cam cua th h tre va d nhin la mt
phn ang k cua th trng.
336
337
339
Tng kt chng
1.
2.
3.
4.
340
5.
6.
CHNG
10
341
341
342
343
SP XP TH T U TIN
CHO CAC GIA TR KEO VA GIA TR Y
T cach anh gia va hanh x thng thng cua con ngi i vi
hai loai trang thai cam xuc, nhng cam xuc tch cc c nh
ngha la cac gia tr keo, bi v tt ca chung ta u b keo v
hng nhng cam xuc o. Ngc lai, nhng cam xuc au n ma
ai cung mun tranh ne c goi la cac gia tr y.
GIA TR Y
B t chi
Xu h
S hai
Tht bai
344
GIA TR KEO
Vui sng
T do
An bnh
Yu thng
JEFF SAM
T do
An toan
Vui thu
Thoai mai
Leo nui
Ngm canh
S nghip/Cng vic
Cng chc
Xe hi
Xe th thao
Xe Volvo
345
346
347
TAI SAO CUC I CON NGI LAI GING NH CHIC PHI THUYN
KHNG GIAN
Dung li noi n du th cuc i cua mi chung ta cung ging
nh chic phi thuyn khng gian vy. Khi ban co mt ch n ro
rang, ban se xac nh c toa hoc hng i giup ban nhm
thng vao muc tiu ma tin, phong ln Mt Trng hay sao Hoa
chng han. Nhng ban cn nhin liu (rt nhiu nhin liu)
phong phi thuyn, ung khng?
TI
R
I
G
G
N
S
T
A
349
350
Hoc
Cu hoi s 3: Hay ngh v mt thi im ban co ng lc lam mt
vic g o. Trong thi im o, ban ang hng ti cam
xuc tch cc nao?
Gia s ban tng co ng lc tham gia vao mt cuc thi hung
bin hoc tm kim tai nng tre. Hay t hoi, Mnh mun co
c trang thai cam xuc nao nht khi lam vic nay?. Co phai la
s vui sng i kem vi danh ting? Hay cam giac at c
mt cai g o? S phat trin ca nhn hay ch la s thoa man
thun tuy? Mt ln na, nhng iu nay se giup ban tm ra
cac gia tr keo cua ban.
351
352
Tin bac
T do
An toan
Quyn lc
Danh th
353
1 Thanh cng
4 T do
7 S phat trin
2 Hanh phuc
5 Sc khoe
3 Tnh yu
6 An toan
354
355
356
357
1......................................................................................................................
2......................................................................................................................
3......................................................................................................................
4......................................................................................................................
5......................................................................................................................
6......................................................................................................................
7......................................................................................................................
1......................................................................................................................
2......................................................................................................................
3......................................................................................................................
4......................................................................................................................
5......................................................................................................................
6......................................................................................................................
7......................................................................................................................
359
CAC GIA TR SNG CUA BAN TH HIN CON NGI BN TRONG BAN
Tuyt lm! Vy la ban a bit cac gia tr keo va gia tr y cua
mnh, vi th hang cu th va nh ngha ro rang. By gi n
oan thu v nht y.
Ti mun ban t cac gia tr sng cua ban canh nhau va ngay
trc mt phn tch chung. Cac gia tr nay co giai thch tai sao
ban lai a ra nhng quyt nh trong qua kh khng? Chung co
giup ban hiu c ly do ng sau mt cach hanh x nht nh
cua ban khng?
Nu ban at c nhng thanh tch nao o, cac gia tr cua ban co
ly giai c iu o khng? Quan trong hn, nu ban tht vong v
khng at c kt qua mong mun hoc muc tiu ra, nhng
gia tr y co gop phn lam sang to ly do khng?
Ngoai ra, nhng gia tr nay co giai thch c cac quyt nh cua
ban trong s nghip? i vi gia nh? V tnh trang sc khoe
cua ban? Trong cac mi quan h ca nhn? Hay danh thi gian cn
thit vit ra nhng kham pha cua mnh nhe!
.....................................................................................................................
....................................................................................................................
....................................................................................................................
....................................................................................................................
....................................................................................................................
....................................................................................................................
....................................................................................................................
....................................................................................................................
....................................................................................................................
....................................................................................................................
....................................................................................................................
....................................................................................................................
....................................................................................................................
360
CAC GIA TR SNG CUA BAN CO NGM PHA HOAI THANH CNG
CUA BAN KHNG?
Quan trong hn ca, ti mun ban kim tra xem cac gia tr sng cua
ban co pha hoai thanh cng cua ban khng? Cach ban sp xp th t
u tin cho cac gia tr hoc nh ngha chung co mu thun vi muc
tiu cua ban khng? Liu chung co giup ban thc hin c m cua
mnh khng?
Nu ban c loay hoay mai ma vn khng at c kt qua mong
mun trong bt ky lnh vc cuc sng nao, ban cn tm hiu xem cac
gia tr cua ban co can tr ban khng. Cho phep ti k ban nghe vai cu
chuyn ma ti mt thy tai nghe nhe.
361
Gia tr y
nh ngha
Khi b ngi khac
phan bac y kin
Khi khng at c
muc tiu ra
Tnh yu va s t do co i lp nhau?
Mt chang trai phat hin ly do tai sao nhng mi tnh cua mnh
thng cht yu. Gia tr keo s mt cua anh la tnh yu (vi anh,
tnh yu ngha la co mi quan h bn vng vi ngi khac phai).
Mt khac, s t do lai ng th hai k sau o (anh nh ngha t
do ngha la khng b ai vn veo hoi han va mun lam g th lam).
Mi khi c n, anh lai b thuc y bi cam giac mun duy tr mt
mi quan h nao o (do nhu cu yu va c yu). Nhng n luc
anh co c mi quan h n nh vi ngi ban gai th anh lai cam
thy mnh b tc ht t do, th la mt cach v thc, anh lai pha hoai
mi quan h ma anh va ct cng xy p kia, tr v tnh trang
n thn nhng c t do hn. Kt qua la cac mi quan h yu
ng cua anh ch mn nng c 3 - 4 thang. Theo cach y, chang
trai nay a cho hai gia tr keo cao nht khin anh kh s.
Nh ban co th thy, vic ban sp xp cac gia tr sng cua ban thn
co tac dung thuc y ban hoc gii han ban. Quan trong hn, ban cn
nh ngha cac gia tr sng mt cach ung n va phu hp.
363
365
nh ngha
Gia tr y
nh ngha
1.......................................................................................................................
.......................................................................................................................
2......................................................................................................................
.......................................................................................................................
3......................................................................................................................
.......................................................................................................................
4......................................................................................................................
.......................................................................................................................
5......................................................................................................................
.......................................................................................................................
6......................................................................................................................
.......................................................................................................................
7......................................................................................................................
.......................................................................................................................
366
367
CH LI TO LN CUA GIA TR Y
Ban cn hiu rng, bn canh cac gia tr keo, cac gia tr y cung
co sc manh to ln giup ban vn ti muc tiu. Trong thc t, a
s moi ngi co nhiu ng lc hn nh vao nhu cu mun tranh
xa ni au hn la mun nhn c nim vui. Chng han, nhiu
ngi chu bo thi gian lam vic ngoai gi v ho s b ui vic
hn la mun co c hi thng tin.
V du, nu gia tr y cao nht cua ban la tht bai (theo cach
hiu la bo cuc), no se khin ban lin tuc hanh ng cho n khi
369
370
TAO RA NG LC MANH ME
Mt trong nhng cach thc manh me nht thit k cac gia tr
sng cua ban la vic tao ra ca lc keo ln lc y v pha muc
tiu cuc i ban. Chuyn nay cung ging nh vic t thc n
mt bn va vt phat nhit u bn kia hng con amip i
v mt hng.
Ban lam vic nay nh th nao? n gian bng cach sp xp cac
gia tr keo va gia tr y cua ban sao cho chung co tac dung cng
hng cung y ban i theo mt hng. Sau y la mt vai cach
thit k cac gia tr sng nhm thuc y ban i ti.
Gia tr keo
Gia tr y
Thanh cng
(hng v pha muc tiu)
S hoan tt cng vic
Tht bai
(khng c gng hoc bo cuc)
Nham chan
Tr hoan
371
372
373
374
Tng kt chng
1.
2.
3.
4.
5.
375
CHNG
11
377
THIT K VN MNH
Ngi c m trn tranh thc t, ke m c thay i
thc tai vnh vin. Soichiro Honda
377
378
379
380
381
150.000
1500
S hp ng bao him cn co la
* Ghi chu: Ty l cuc hen khach hang la s cuc hen khach hang trn tng s cuc in thoai goi ti khach hang.
Ty l cuc hen = (S cuc hen) / (S cuc goi)
382
383
384
385
386
387
388
389
391
392
3) Ni s tht bai
Ni s tht bai, s b t chi, phan i hay s xu h chc chn
se lam hu ht moi ngi t lit va mt ht nhu kh ngay bc
khi u nan. Trong mt khoa ao tao, ti gp mt ngi khng
bao gi dam t ra bt c muc tiu nao, ch v c s n gh ngi
khi ngh n canh mnh tht bai va khng at c iu ma c
hng n trong tm tng. Su thm trong long c t nhu, nu
mnh khng mong i g ht th mnh u co tht bai.
Bn mi nm v trc, me ti cung lam mt iu tng t nh
vy khi ba tham d ky thi tt nghip cp trung hoc c s. Ba inh
ninh rng mnh se thi rt mn Toan (mn hoc ma ba rt ghet), th
la ba quyt nh chng tha khng d thi con hn mang im xu
v nha!
Nghe co ve rt ng ngn, nhng trong thc t, co nhiu ngi lam
nh vy y. Ho mt mc tin rng, tt hn ht la ng ra mt
ngng phn u nao ca, ho khoi phai tht vong v ban thn.
iu nay co ngha la nhng ngi lin tuc ra muc tiu cho
mnh khng s tht bai chng? Ti khng ngh nh vy. Ti cho
rng ht thay moi ngi trn i ai cung khng thch va s b tht
bai, trong o co ca ti na. Vy th iu g mang lai cho ho s can
am dam a ra nhng muc tiu xa vi va phn u vn ti cho
bng c? Vn la ch nhng ngi y co cach nh ngha
ring v tht bai. (Chung ta a cp n ni dung nay trong
chng v Gia tr sng.)
Ngi duy nht co th khng nh ban tht bai va lam cho ban
cam thy ti t la... chnh ban. Phai, y chnh la cach ma nhiu
ngi thng t bn vao chn mnh. Tai thi im ho khng at
c iu ho mun, thm ch ngay trong c gng u tin, ho
bung bao da rng, th la mnh a tht bai va cam thy khng con
CHNG 11: THI T K V N M N H
393
395
30%
bo cuc
396
30%
bo cuc
397
398
399
401
402
403
404
405
406
407
409
Ngi trng nhom nhn vin ban bao him dam t ra nhng
muc tiu phi thc t
Cho phep ti c a thm mt dn chng na t d an c vn
cua ti cho mt cng ty v bao him nhn tho. Hin nay, hu ht
cac trng nhom nhn vin ban bao him u mt khoang 5 ti
10 nm tao lp c mt i ngu nhn vin di ho khoang
50 ngi. Cach thng thng la tuyn dung thm nhn vin mi
bng cach phong vn nhng ng c vin tim nng, thng qua
quang cao tuyn dung hoc gii thiu truyn ming.
Vy ma co mt trng nhom cua mt cng ty bao him ln a
lam ti chu y bi s thanh cng thn tc cua anh trong lnh vc
nay. Ch trong vong 12 thang sau khi vao ngh, anh a at c
danh hiu Millionaire Dollar Round Table (MDRT ch danh
cho 6% nhn vin ban bao him hang u trn th gii). Anh lin
tip at c danh hiu nay trong 5 nm lin va cui cung ra
thanh lp cng ty ring. Ti kham pha ra rng, mt trong nhng
nhn t chnh quyt nh s thanh cng cua anh la do anh dam
xac lp nhng muc tiu mang tnh thach thc ma hu ht moi
ngi u xem la phi thc t.
Vao nm th hai trong cng v trng nhom, anh a t ra mt muc
tiu khng tng: o la tuyn dung 50 nhn vin trong vong 5 thang,
va anh con nhm ti vic dn dt 80% s nhn vin mi nay at
c danh hiu MDRT trong vong 12 thang. Mt iu bt kha thi
nu anh cung i theo li mon nh nhng ngi trng nhom bnh
thng khac. Tuy nhin, chnh muc tiu xa vi nay a buc anh
phai suy ngh sang tao va t hoi ban thn mnh, Lam th nao ti
thc hin c iu nay?. i khi ban khng cn phai ngh ra giai
phap cho mt vn ma ban co th hoc hoi t nhng ngi xung
quanh. Do o, anh n cu vin ti giup anh tuyn 50 nhn vin
ban bao him co nng lc trong vong 5 thang.
410
411
413
414
THIT K VN MNH
Vi tt ca kin thc hoc c trong quyn sach nay, ban hay sn sang
thit k vn mnh cua mnh. Bai tp sau y se giup ban phat huy tr
tng tng va khai pha nhng iu ban tht s mong mun at c
hay tao ra trong cuc sng trong vong 10-15 nm ti.
Sau y la mt vai nguyn tc ban co th at hiu qua ti a trong
phn thc hanh nay.
415
......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
416
......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
417
......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
418
......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
CHNG 11: THI T K V N M N H
419
......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
420
1......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
2......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
3......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
4......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
S nghip va kinh doanh
1......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
2......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
3......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
4......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
421
1......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
2......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
3......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
4......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
Gia nh va ban be
1......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
2......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
3......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
4......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
1......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
2......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
3......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
4......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
422
1......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
2......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
3......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
4......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
1......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
2......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
3......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
4......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
1......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
2......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
3......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
4......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
423
Gia nh va ban be
1......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
2......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
3......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
4......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
1......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
2......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
3......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
4......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
1......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
2......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
3......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
4......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
424
1......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
2......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
3......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
4......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
1......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
2......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
3......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
4......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
Gia nh va ban be
1......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
2......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
3......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
4......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
425
1......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
2......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
3......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
4......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
1......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
2......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
3......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
4......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
S nghip va kinh doanh
1......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
2......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
3......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
4......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
426
1......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
2......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
3......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
4......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
Gia nh va ban be
1......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
2......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
3......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
4......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
ong gop cho xa hi
1......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
2......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
3......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
4......................................................................................................................
......................................................................................................................
427
Hnh dung: Nap nng lng cam xuc cho muc tiu cua ban
Bc cui cung nay la bc v cung manh me v cam xuc thuc
y hanh ng cua ban, ch khng phai ly tr. Gia s ban mun
429
430
431
432
433
Tng kt chng
1.
2.
3.
l
l
l
l
l
4.
5.
6.
434
l
l
l
Tham khao
Bandler, R., Using Your Brain for a Change (Utah: Real People Press, 1985).
Branson, R., Losing My Virginity (Great Britain: Virgin Publishing Ltd, 1998).
Dearlove, D., Business the Richard Branson Way
(United Kingdom: Capstone Publishing Limited, 1998).
Dearlove, D., Business the Bill Gates Way
(United Kingdom: Capstone Publishing Limited, 1999).
Dilts, R., Applications of Neuro-Linguistic Programming
(California: Meta Publications, 1983).
Dilts, R., Changing Belief Systems with NLP (California: Meta Publications, 1990).
James, T & Woodsmall, W., Time Line Therapy and the Basis of Personality
(California: Meta Publications, 1988).
Hamilton, N., Bill Clinton: An American Journey: Great Expectations
(UK: Century, 2003).
Hansen, M & Allen R., The One Minute Millionaire
(Australia: Random House, 2002).
Khoo, A., I Am Gifted, So Are You! (Singapore: Times Publishing, 1998).
Kroc, R & Anderson, R., Grinding it Out: The Making of McDonalds
(Chicago: Contemporary Books, 1977).
Lewis, B & Pucelik, F., Magic of NLP Demystified
(Portland: Metamorphosis Press, 1990).
OKeeffee, J., Business Beyond the Box (London: Nicholas Brealey Publishing, 1998).
Robbins, A., Unlimited Power (Great Britain: Simon & Schuster, 1988).
Robbins, A., Awaken the Giant Within (New York: Summit Books, 1991).
Roddick, A. & Prokop, I., Body and Soul: Profits with Principles The Amazing
Success Story of Anita Roddick and the Body Shop (New York: Crown, 1991).
Rossi, E., The Psychobiology of Mind Body Healing
(New York: W.W. Norton & Company, 1993).
Shone, S., Creative Visualization (London: The Aquarian Press, 1984).