Hn cho nh th no cho ng cch?

D Gilles Debunne l ngi Php nhng ngay c ng cng g p kh khn trong vi c ngh ra
phi hn bao nhiu m khi ng i khp ni trn nc Php.
V k s phn mm 40 tui n t Toulouse ni rng khi ng g p
ai t mt vng khc ca t nc
ng lun gp tnh hung kh x khi m ng khng bit liu ng c phi ngng li hay khng. Nu
khng, ng phi hn ti ci m k tip th iu g s xy ra? l do s chic m phi hn rt khc
nhau cc ni trn nc Php t ch mt min ty ca Brittany cho n bn Thung lng Loire.
Bn v n hn
La bise, n hn trong ting Php, thng xy ra nht gia hai ngi khc phi v gia nhng ngi
n vi nhau. i vi n ng l vn v s thn thit (bn thn v ngi thn s mong c hn
nhng i tc lm n mi gp th khng).
gip nm r vic ny, chuyn gia my tnh ny ngh ra mt cch gip ng thun tin: bn
tng tc v n hn Php.
Bn nh du bng mu sc ny c chia ra theo cc n v a l hnh chnh ca nc Php v
lin tc c cp nht nh vo ngi dn trn khp nc Php b phiu v con s bao nhiu n hn
mt, hai, ba, bn hay thm ch l nm c xem l quy chun khu vc ca h.
c hn 100.000 phiu bu c ghi nhn k t khi phn mm ny c a ln mng hi nm
2008 v n tr thnh ngun thng tin xc nh v vi c hn m trn cc phng tin truyn thng ni
ting Php.
Mc d cng trnh ca Debunne gip du khch c ci nhn v s cho hi ca nc Php, cc phong
tc vn ha khng bao gi n gin n vy trong thc t. Cho d c l mt n hn vng v, mt
ci nm tay gy bi ri hay ci ci u th thin, tri qua thch thc v cc cch cho hi trn ton cu
thng l th nghim chng thm vo u.
Hn sao cho ng?
nhng t nc nh M, Anh v c, quy chun cho hi l bt tay. Do khi anh Stephen Rinaldi,
ngi M, 25 tui, n lm vic vng Abruzzo, lc u anh rt lo lng v phong tc hn m
y.
Cch i ph ca anh ngay t u l t phng bng cch ch ng vai tr ngi c hn. Ch
trong vng vi ngy Rinaldi nhn ra l cch i ph ca anh sai. Anh bt u quan st nhng
ngi khc v nhn ra rng mi ngi lun hn c hai m v dng nh n hn bt u t m phi
sau sang m tri v khng h c vic chm mi trc tip ln m: ging nh c p m vo m
vi m thanh nh n hn.
Hiu c iu ny, anh hn thng ln m khi anh gp b ch nh ni anh . S cho hi ny
ht sc thnh cng nn anh phm sai lm l lp li cch cho hi ny vi chng b y. Ngay lp
tc anh chuyn sang bt tay v n tr thnh ging nh mt ci m vng v. T s c ny, Rinaldi
hc c mt bi hc quan trng. Tr phi anh bit r ngi nam gii trc mt th ch cn bt tay l
.

Hnh vi b ln n
Mt ni m hai ngi khc gii tuyt i khng c php hn cng khai l Cc tiu Vng quc
Rp thng nht. Nhng cng ng ngc nhin nu bn thy hai ngi nam gii nm tay nhau hay hn
vo m nhau.
Hn m l chuyn thng gia nhng ngi Rp cng gii nhng by t s thn mt vi ngi
khc gii ni cng cng l hnh vi b ln n v mt s ni cn l ti danh b trng pht, ng
Kashif A, mt chuyn gia t vn tip th k thut s c lp Dubai v thng xuyn vit v nhng
khc bit vn ha trn trang mng ca ng c tn l Dubai Expat Blog, ni.
Nu hai ngi ng gii nm tay nhau th, ng ni, h c xem nh l bn tt ca nhau.
chnh l iu m cu Tng thng M George W Bush nhn ra khi ng hi kin Thi t Rp
Saudi hi nm 2005. Nhng tm nh chp hai ng nm tay nhau lan truyn ht sc nhanh chng v
lm pht sinh tranh lun v mi lin h gia vic nm tay nhau v xy dng tnh thn trong th gii
Rp.
mt s nc th ngi nc ngoi cng khng cn n vic hn hay nm tay. Chng hn nh
Trung Quc, thng thng ngi ta cho hi nhau bng cch bt tay nh v hi Anh/ch n ung
g cha?. y thc s khng phi l li mi i n m l mt cch hi thm kiu nh Anh/ch c khe
khng?.
Cch ci ngi cho
Cn Nht Bn chng ta cn phi hiu nhiu tng ngha v quy lu t bt thnh vn ca vic ci
ngi cho.
Ti tht s tr thnh mt chuyn gia hiu v tc ci ngi khi ti i su vo vng nng thn gia
lng nhng khu vc bo th ca Nht Bn, c Siobhan Sullivan, mt gio vin Anh ng n t San
Francisco, ni. Tuy nhin, khng phi l vic la chn c nhn. Tht ra, chnh l v hiu trng
cc k khc k trng ca ti yu cu ti n vn phng gp ng ta trong s khinh b chng cn
giu dim v c ci u ca ti cho ng y.
Vn tt c nm trong nh mt. C gio 28 tui ny vn nhn vo mt ng y trong khi ci u xung
v v hiu trng th ngh rng c ta ang tr mt nhn ng y mt cch bt knh. C hc c cch
nhn sang ni khc, tay cht sang mt bn v ci xung thp hn v hiu trng.
Sau bi hc ny, ng nghip ca c ngi khen cch c ci u cho v thm ch cn nh c sa
cha cho nhng hc vin ci cho gio vin theo nghi thc trc khi bt u bui hc. t nhin c
thy mnh quay ngot hon ton v tr thnh ngi yu cu hc vin ci u cho i cho li cho n
khi c hon ton va lng.
i n nhng nc xa l lm vic hay ngh ngi i khi ging nh lm xong bi thi v php lch s
khp ni trn th gii. Tuy nhin c hai bc n gin bt c ai cng c th lm c m bo
vic cho hi c sun s nht c th.
Lun cho ngi khc lm trc v lm theo h, c Ann Marie Sabath, tc gi ca cun sch Php
x giao trong Kinh doanh, khuyn.
Sabath cho rng nu khng chc th tt nht th nn phm sai lm m t cch cn trng khi mi gp
nhau ln u tin nhng cng ng ngc nhin nu cch cho hi c thay i m t khi bn thit lp
c mi quan h ban u. Suy cho cng, bn s khng bao gi bit khi no th ci bt tay c th tr
thnh ci hn, ci ci u hay snh bc cng nhau tay trong tay.

Solve the kissing conundrum

By Mark Johanson
Gilles Debunne may be a Frenchman, but even he has trouble working out how many cheeks to kiss as
he travels around France.
The 40-year-old software engineer from Toulouse said that when he meets someone from another part
of the country there is always this awkward moment where you dont know if you need to stop. Or, if
you continue to the next cheek, what happens? Thats because the number of cheeks varies widely
across France from as little as one in western parts of Brittany to four in the Loire Valley.
La bise, as its known, is most common between opposite sexes and among women. With men its often
a question of familiarity (close friends and family may expect a kiss, but a new business partner
probably wont).
To gain clarity on the matter, the computer wizz devised a method to put himself at ease: an interactive
map of kisses in France.
Debunnes colour-coded map is divided by French departments, or geographical administrative
divisions, and constantly updated as people across France vote on how many kisses one, two, three,
four or even five is the norm in their region. Its registered more than 100,000 votes since it first went
online in 2008, and has become the definitive source on cheek kissing in the French-language media.
Though Debunnes survey helps to put Frances hyperlocal greetings in perspective for visitors, cultural
mores are never quite so simple in practice. Be it a clumsy kiss, a surprise hand-hold or a botched bow,
running the gauntlet of global greetings is all too often a humbling experiment in trial and error.
The kissing conundrum
In countries like the US, England and Germany its standard practice to greet with a firm handshake. So
when American Stephen Rinaldi, 25, arrived in Italy in April to work at a country residence in the
Abruzzo region, he was initially quite nervous about all the cheek-kissing.
His game plan from the start was to go on the defence by only playing the role of the kissee, or the
one whos kissed. It was a matter of days before Rinaldi realised his method was flawed. He began
observing others and found that you always kiss both cheeks and it seems that you go right check,
then left. And there is no real direct touch of the lips to the cheek; its more like a cheek-to-cheek
embrace with a kissing sound.
With this knowledge of the air kiss in mind, the American went straight for the cheek when he first met
the matriarch of the country residence. The greeting was an overwhelming success, so he mistakenly
decided to replicate it with her husband.
He immediately went for a handshake and it turned into something likethe awkward hug at the end of
the Will Ferrell movie Step Brothers. From this incident, Rinaldi learned another important lesson:
Unless he knew the male in front of him very well, a handshake was best.
Holding hands
One place where there is absolutely no kissing between opposite sexes in public is the United Arab
Emirates. But dont be at all surprised if you see two men holding hands or kissing each other on the
cheek.
Kissing on the cheek is common between Arabs of the same gender, but showing intimacy with the
opposite gender in public is frowned upon, and a punishable offence in some locations, said Kashif A,
who works as a freelance digital marketing consultant in Dubai and frequently writes about cultural
differences on his website, Dubai Expat Blog.
If two people of the same gender are holding hands he said, they should be considered as good
friends.
Thats exactly what former US president George W Bush discoveredwhen he met the Crown Prince of
Saudi Arabia in 2005. Photographs of the two holding hands went viral, sparking a conversation about
the connection between hand-holding and building bonds in the Arab world.
How low can you go?

In some countries its neither kissing nor holding hands that foreigners should be aware of. In China, for
instance, its quite common to be greeted with a light handshake and the question have you eaten yet?
This isnt actually an invitation to a meal, but rather a way of asking, how are you?
Over in Japan one must master the layered meanings and unspoken rules of bowing.
I truly became a master of the bow when I arrived deep in the countryside in the heart of conservative
Japan, recalled English teacher Siobhan Sullivan of San Francisco. But it wasnt a personally selected
mission. In fact, it was my extremely stoic school principal who, in thinly-veiled disgust at my bow to
him, asked to see me in his office.
Siobhan Sullivan learned an important lesson living in Japan. (Credit: Siobhan Sullivan)
The problem was all in the eyes. The 28-year-old maintained eye contact and bobbed her head down,
but the principal felt like she was disrespectfully gawking at him. She learned to avert her eyes, put her
arms firmly by her side and bend at the waist lower than her superior.
I had been unmercifully swiping the get-out-jail-free' card that is being a foreigner in Japan, she said.
But after the lesson, her co-workers complimented her on her bowing skills and even asked her to
correct students who made lackadaisical attempts during the pre-class ritual of bowing to the teacher.
Suddenly, she found herself on the other end of the aisle, asking her students to repeat their bows until
she was completely satisfied that they were up to par.
Following the leader
Travelling to new countries for work or leisure can often feel like a finishing school test in global
etiquette, but there are two simple steps everyone can take to assure greetings are as smooth as
possible.
Always let the other person start and always follow suit, said Ann Marie Sabath, author of the book
Business Etiquette: 101 Ways to Conduct Business with Charm and Savvy.
Sabath said if in doubt its best to err on the side of caution when you first meet, but dont be surprised
if
the greeting changes once youve made an initial connection. After all, you never know when that
handshake may turn into a kiss, a bow or a walk down the street, hand in hand.