CONFUCIUS RE EXAMINED

1) Man who wants pretty nurse, must be patient.

2) Passionate kiss, like spider web, leads to undoing of fly.
3) Better to be pissed off than pissed on.
4) Boy who goes to sleep with stiff problem wakes up with solution in hand.
5) Couple on 7 day honeymoon make hole weak.
6) Girl who sits on jockeys' lap gets hot tip, girl who sits on judges' lap gets an
honourable discharge.
7) Lady who goes camping must beware of evil intent.
8) Man who keep feet firmly on ground have trouble putting on pants.
9) Squirrel who runs up womans' leg will not find nuts.
10) Man who leap off cliff jump to conclusion.
11) Man with tight trousers is pressing his luck.
12) Man who scratches bum should not bite fingernails.
13) Panties not best thing on earth! But next to best thing on earth.
14) War does not determine who is right, war determines who is left.
15) Man who fight with wife all day get no piece at night.
16) Man who drives like hell, bound to get there.
17) Man who stands on toilet is high on pot.
18) Man who live in glass house should change clothes in basement.
19) Man who fish in other mans' well often catch craps.
20) "A lion will not cheat on his wife, but a Tiger Wood!"