Gelus: Hello. Allow us to introduce ourselves.

My name is Gelus, and were a

traveling improv group. Here, let me give you a demonstration. My men shall play a
group of drunken sailors, and youre a bunch of baby seals. Aaaand, go.

[Some murdering happens]

Gelus: Aaand, scene.

Mayor Moori: What do you want from us? Why are you slaughtering our people?
Gelus: Wellll, I was just in the area and I thought this would be a delightful place for
a summer home- What the f**k do you think Im here for?
Mayor Moori: Our trees?
Gelus: Nivalis, two or three more.
Nivalis: Two or three more?
Gelus: Two or three more.

[More murdering happens]

Gelus: Very good Nivalis. See? Why cant you be more like him, Algor?
Algor: Sorry Boss.
Gelus: Now, then, all kidding aside Wheres the Dragon Ball?
Mayor Moori: We dont have it.
Gelus: You know, Id be inclined to believe you if the last village mayor didnt say
the exact same thing Until we killed everyone and tortured the information out of
him, of course. Its the darndest thing, too Youre beginning to remind me a lot of
him.
Mayor Moori: Please. Do not be upset.
Gelus: Ohhh, I dont get upset. I have people to do that for me. Algor?
Algor: With gusto.
Warrior: Stop right there!

Gelus: Oh, look, more baby seals.

Warrior: Were here to stop this senseless slaughter of our people.
Gelus: Ninety-two
Warrior: This has gone on for too long. And now, youre going to pay.
Gelus: Three hundred and fifty-five
Warrior: We are We What are you?
Gelus: No, go on, continue, dont mind me.
Warrior: And We are the ones who will stop you.
Gelus: Ooh, wow, four hundred and nineteen.
Warrior: And... What the Hell are you doing?
Gelus: Oh, sorry, its a little hobby of mine. I hear these heroic speeches so wearily
often, so Ive started keeping a mental list of how many times Ive hear certain
lines.
Warrior: You You insane bastard.
Gelus: One hundred and ninety.
Warrior: Yeah? Well, uh, were going to F**K YOUR FACE!
Gelus: Oh-oh, my! ....twelve.
Warrior: Hrrrh!
Gelus: Nivalis, give the command!
Nivalis: Algor, give the command!
Algor: Get em.

[a few minutes pass]

Nivalis: Sir, they seem to be stronger than we thought.

Gelus: Oh, how cute.

[explosion]

Algor: Kinda killin our guys.

Gelus: Oh, we have more of those things back at the base. Its not like were losing
anything valuable.

[Moori destroys the magical artifact]

Gelus: Huh-uggggggh.
Mayor Moori: Hah! Now you can no longer find the shards!
Gelus: Algor? Kill them.
Algor: Kay.
Warrior: Come on, bring it! Theres three of us, and one of you!
Algor: Man, you must suck at math even worse than me.
Warrior: What do you mean?
Algor: Theres only TWO of you.
Warrior: Thats not right- Gaaaaaah!

[ Warriors dies]

Gelus: Bravo, Algor! Now, seeing as we have no one left to threaten you with Oh,
wait, what are those adorable little things over there?
Mayor Moori: You wouldnt.
Gelus: Theyre just so cute, though! I could just pinch their little heads off. Are you
going to make me do that? Because at this point I could go both ways.
Nivalis: As could I, Lord Gelus.

Mayor Moori: Fine. Here. Take the Ball! And leave us be.
Krillin: See, Gohan? Hes handing over the Dragon Ball. Now no one else has to die.
Gelus: Oh, just one more question. Could you point us in the direction of the next
village? You seem to have destroyed out scouters.
Mayor Moori: That wasnt part of our deal!
Gelus: Annnd five hundred! Algor, show them what theyve won!

[Child murder happens]

Mayor Moori: You You killed my son!

Algor: Yeah, sorry about that. How bout I do you a favor? [Mooris Turn] There. Now
ya
wont miss him.
Gelus: Oh, and while youre at it, could you deal with the rest?
Algor: I really do love kids. They dont leave much of a mess.

[Adventurers are dragged away by wizard]