BOOK REVIEW

HOW NOT TO WORRY

-CAROLINE CARR
I have chosen this book mainly because at times I suffer from over
anxiety, get over stressed about things sometimes, sometimes to even a
point that I think I may get panic attack for the same.
 SYNOPSIS
Anxiety and worry are a part of life. But for many people like me it can also reach
a point where it can spoil or ruin our lives. This book tells us how to deal with the
fact that you are over anxious, get stressed out too easily or even suffer from panic
attacks.

Caroline Carr is a writer and a therapist with both personal and professional
experience of anxiety. She understands how anxiety can blight people’s life and
writes in a straightforward, easy and sympathetic style. She gives all the readers
wealth of tips, ideas, strategies, techniques and case studies that helps all the
people to deal with their stress and anxiety

Throughout the book she explains what the causes of anxiety are, what do you
worry about , why do you worry, what are the different levels of anxiety that
people suffer from like small, medium, large. She explains how one can use
different approaches to deal with the stress level. Also she explains different
strategies that can help us overcome our anxiety like for example the breathing
techniques, thinking rationally. This book also explains that how you can deal with
people who suffer from anxiety or high stress levels.

Most of all, the book helps you to rebuild your confidence so that in future one
can stay in control of your anxiety, instead of letting it control you.
 LEARNINGS
I have chosen this book, how not to worry mainly because at times even I suffer
from over anxiety and get stressed out.

The question I asked myself after reading this book was how much do I worry? I
often have people telling me , don’t worry, really u mustn’t worry about that or
look just calm down you are being ridiculous for worrying about such small and
unimportant things. After reading this book I realized that people experience worry
differently and in different amounts. The different levels of worry and anxiety are:

Small- Most of us worry in small amounts and that is absolutely fine. It is a part of
normal healthy way that we deal with things but when it escalates and gets out of
control, that’s when worry and anxiety becomes a real issue.

Medium- This becomes a nuisance, taking up too much of your time, attention and
energy.

Large- This is a serious issue. When worry escalates and is out of control, it
becomes a terrifying monster which can take over your life.

Extra large- Almost unbearable

At best worry is useful and necessary although the symptoms may be inconvenient.
At worst it can be a living hell.

I realized that neither is my anxiety level too small nor too large but I need 2 take
adequate steps which helps me bring my anxiety level to small so that I do
something productive despite of my anxiety rather than wasting my energy and
time. And reading this book has helped me how I can effectively bring down my
anxiety level.

Worry, anxiety, stress and nervousness are all the terms that describe mental
tension and unease. They are often swapped about and used to describe the same
things, because they share many similar symptoms.

What I learned was, it is amazing how a few little thoughts can actually start a
whole chain of reactions within your body. Worry is a mental thing, the niggling
thoughts and the churning of things over in your mind. Thoughts like: what if so
and so happens? I hope it’s going to be all right. If it goes wrong then what will I
do? But in reality the more you worry the more it takes hold. And the firmer its
grip the more havoc it can cause.

It can even range into experiencing a whole lot of negative emotions such as fear,
guilt, anger, irritation etc. Until reading this book I never realized that all these
emotions are a result of my anxiety. But the worst part of being over anxious or
worried, I realized was rather than solving the problems, I used to become limited
and restricted by my thoughts and feelings. For example I used to spend a lot of
time worrying about something that may never happen, when I could be thinking
about or doing something else.

Also there is a physical side to it like for eg you may get headaches due to
squeezing and tightening of the blood vessels in your mind.

The next big question I asked myself was what do I keep worrying about?

Worry is not a thing that attacks you or that happens to you. You worry because of
the way you think about something. People think about and respond to things
differently. What bothers one person might not concern other person at all.

People worry about different things something which may or may not happen. It
may be an event, a situation, a person, having to make a decision and whether or
not you will make the right one.

What if thoughts

This is what personally affects me a lot. When one is worried about somebody or
something, one fears what may or may not happen. These thoughts can niggle,
grow and develop. I constantly worry what the outcome could be, and what might
happen. I tend to constantly ask myself question. What if something happens? So
really, I am constantly living in the fear of future.

For example I constantly ask myself questions like will I be able to perform well in
the test? What if I fail? What if my classmates don’t like me?

This book made me learn how I can help myself and deal with “what if” thoughts.
The thoughts and feelings associated with worry are mainly negative and
sometimes irrational. If this type of thinking carries on for too long it can become
out of control. One of the ways to stop your thoughts from becoming out of control
is to challenge them. I learnt that we should do this by asking ourselves sensible
questions such as:

How likely is this to happen?

If it is true what is the worst that could happen and how could I deal with this?

How have I dealt with something similar in the past?

Not only this from this book I also learned how I can help someone to deal with
their “what if” thoughts. Tomorrow when I become a manager and I have to deal
with people who are over anxious, I know how to handle such situations. In such
situations we can ask these people questions like the ones above to help them to
challenge their own thinking and gently encourage them to think in a sensible,
rational way. Also we can add in some positive things too because when someone
worries too much they tend to see the negative side of things too quickly.

I also learned that how self talking using the right words can be very helpful to
overcome over anxiousness. What you tell yourself makes a lot of difference.
Thoughts are what you say to yourself silently in your head and if you tell yourself
you are worried and anxious, you will be. You may feel powerless to do anything
about it. This is because you give yourself message