ADVENTURES IN THE CLOSET A CHILDREN'S M USICAL M USIC BY: JASON SPRAGGINS BOOK & LYRICS BY: ANDY BROWN

Andy Brown IRAE1984@GM AIL.COM 407-497-7587 2011

CAST OF CHARACTERS

ELLIOT FLAVIUS FLEUM A/M ISTER M ANIPULO CALLIOPE CATTERWALL LOTTIE (PRINCESS PINDERGHAST) FLUHM A GUARD 1/FORGETFUL FAIRY 1 (PETE) FLUHM A GUARD 2/FORGETFUL FAIRY 2 (GARTH) PERCY PRICKLEPUSS SONG LIST "DO WHAT I WANT" "INCANTATION" "WE'LL PUT THE CREAM IN TEAM WORK" "FORGET" "KINDLE THE M EM ORY" "FLUHM A, FLUHM A, FLUHM A" "INCANTATION" (REPRISE) "RALLY YOUR COURAGE" "IF I'D ONLY" "INCANTATION" (REPRISE) "SOM ETHING INSIDE M E" "IT ISN'T EASY"

12 year-old boy Ruler of Cerelia A cat Rightful heir to Cerelia M ulti-role M ulti-role A porcupine

ELLIOT AND FLAVIUS FLAVIUS ELLIOT AND CALLIOPE FORGETFUL FAIRIES ELLIOT, LOTTIE, AND CALLIOPE FLAVIUS, PETE, AND GARTH FLAVIUS LOTTIE AND FLAVIUS ELLIOT FLAVIUS LOTTIE COM PANY

SCENE ONE A boys playroom. Set does not have to be practical, can be suggested. The only practical set piece we need for this scene are the closet doors. There are toys strewn about, but they are neglected as the child is playing a video game on his computer. The boys name is ELLIOT. He is twelve years-old, and like many twelve year olds, does not see beyond the boundaries of his own needs. At rise, ELLIOT has achieved some great feat in the world of his computer game. He gets up and dances around. ELLIOT Yes! Bow down before Kro-lon, the mightiest wizard in all of M yopia! (Sing-song) Whos a mighty wizard? Im a mighty wizard! Whos a mighty wizard? Im a mighty wizard! Light rises on PERCY at DR as ELLIOT continues to dance. PERCY is a porcupine, old and wise and very proper. PERCY Once upon a time, there was a little boy named Elliot. ELLIOT stops dancing and notices PERCY. ELLIOT Hey! Who are you? PERCY M y name is Percy Pricklepuss. For the purposes of exposition, I will be narrating this little story. ELLIOT But youre a...

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PERCY Yes. Im a porcupine. M ay I continue? ELLIOT I guess. PERCY As I was saying, once upon a time... ELLIOT Thats dumb. PERCY Excuse me? ELLIOT Why do you have to start with once upon a time? Its lame. PERCY What would you have me say? ELLIOT I dunno. Anything. How about, So there was this kid named Elliot... PERCY Hardly traditional. But Ill give it a shot. So there was this kid named Elliot. Now Elliot was a spoiled brat who always got his way and never thought about anybody but himself. Hows that so far? ELLIOT Rude. PERCY You should talk. Their banter is interrupted by an offstage voice. JOAN (OFF STAGE) Elliot! Its time for bed!

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PERCY Fine. Youre on your own. See how well you do without a narrator. I have to finish preparing for my part in the show anyway. Its terribly dramatic. (To audience) Suffice to say, Elliot has a bit of an attitude when it comes to his step-mother, Joan. Farewell! PERCY exits. ELLIOT Can I stay up a little longer? I just became a super, exalted, five-wand wielding wizard of the realm! JOAN (OFF STAGE) I dont care! Go to bed! And dont forget to brush your teeth! ELLIOT Yes, maam. JOAN (OFF STAGE) Tomorrows garbage day! You better not forget to take the cans out to the curb! ELLIOT Yes, maam. JOAN (OFF STAGE) And you didnt do your chores this morning before school! Dont let it happen again! ELLIOT Yes, maam. (Waits for more scolding. Nothing.) Its not fair. Why should I have to go to bed before Im ready? Joan never lets me do anything I want. Shes not even my real mother. I wish mom were still alive. (M USIC CUE) Id be better off if I didnt live here. Then I could make my own rules. I could do what I want! DO WHAT I WANT ELLIOT IF I DIDNT HAVE TO DO M Y CHORES, SWEEP THE WALK AND M OP THE FLOORS, LIFE WOULD BE A PIECE OF PIE FOR M E. IF I DIDNT HAVE TO HAUL THE TRASH, M OW THE LAWN FOR NO CASH, I WOULD BE FOOTLOOSE AND FANCY FREE!

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BUT I DONT HAVE A CHOICE AND I DONT HAVE A SAY. IF I DID YOU COULD BET ID PLAY THROUGH THE DAY AND I WOULDNT EVER SLEEP THE NIGHT AWAY! I WOULD EAT WHAT I WANT. I WOULD WEAR WHAT I WANT. AND IT WOULDNT EVEN M ATTER IF I WANTED WHAT I WANT. I WOULD TAKE IT JUST BECAUSE I CAN. YOU M IGHT SAY THE KID IS SELFISH AND THAT WOULDNT BE UNTRUE. BUT ID DO WHAT I WANT ANYTIM E THAT I WANT. IT DOESNT M ATTER WHAT YOU SAY OR DO! M usic continues. There is a knock on the closet door from the inside. ELLIOT is startled. ELLIOT Whos there? The door opens. Out walks a man dressed in a brilliant suit, colorful and busy with designs. He also wears a stylish hat. His name is M ISTER M ANIPULO. M ISTER M ANIPULO I couldnt help but overhear your predicament. ELLIOT Who are you? M ISTER M ANIPULO M anipulos the name. M ister M anipulo. Ive come to help you. ELLIOT How?

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M ISTER M ANIPULO Ever hear of Cerelia? ELLIOT Cerelia? Whats that? M ISTER M ANIPULO Its not a what, kid. Its a where. Cerelia is where Im from. Its a magical land. And sometimes, in very special circumstances, I like to invite kids like yourself to visit for a while. Understand? ELLIOT But I have to go to bed. M ISTER M ANIPULO Not in Cerelia. No sir! Why a super, exalted, five-wand wielding wizard of the realm can do whatever he wants! (sings) YOU CAN EAT WHAT YOU WANT YOU CAN WEAR WHAT YOU WANT AND IT WOULDNT EVEN M ATTER IF YOU WANTED WHAT YOU WANT. YOU COULD TAKE IT JUST BECAUSE YOU CAN. YOURE THE M ASTER, AND IM THE SERVANT. JUST TELL M E WHAT TO DO. YOU CAN DO WHAT YOU WANT, ANYTIM E THAT YOU WANT. SAY THE WORD! ILL M AKE IT HAPPEN FOR YOU! M usic continues. ELLIOT Cerelia, huh. How do we get there? M ISTER M ANIPULO Well, my friend, it just so happens that M ister M anipulo knows a little magic himself.

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ELLIOT Really? Cool! M ISTER M ANIPULO Thats right. So, you wanna come with me to Cerelia? ELLIOT Will I get in trouble with Joan? M ISTER M ANIPULO She wont even know youre gone. ELLIOT thinks. M usic intensifies. ELLIOT I dont know. M ISTER M ANIPULO You said it yourself. Shes not even your real mother. ELLIOT Okay. Ill do it! M ISTER M ANIPULO Thats my boy! Lets see what we can cook up together. M ISTER M ANIPULO pulls out a wand. He aims it at the closet. Lighting in the closet goes crazy and smoke pours out. ELLIOT Whats happening? M ISTER M ANIPULO Youre getting what you want, kid. INCANTATION M ISTER M ANIPULO OPEN THE VORTEX, A M IRROR TO ALL YOUR DREAM S. ONCE YOU HAVE ENTERED, NOTHING APPEARS AS IT SEEM S.

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FARALLA PALLALLA YOURE GETTING WHATS COM ING TO YOU! WELCOM E, M Y SLAVE, BETTER NOT M ISBEHAVE, JUST BRACE YOURSELF FOR WHAT I HAVE IN STORE FOR YOU! M ISTER M ANIPULO laughs maniacally. Strobe lights flash. ELLIOT M ister M anipulo, I dont wanna go! Ive changed my mind. M ISTER M ANIPULO Dont fight it, kid. See you on the other side. Lights flash. Smoke billows onto stage. M ISTER M ANIPULO and ELLIOT spin as if in slow motion, pulled into the closet. Once theyre inside, the doors slam shut, and there is an explosion of light. BLACKOUT.

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SCENE TWO Lights rise on ELLIOT and M ISTER M ANIPULO in a quarry. There is oversized trash, almost cartoon-like in nature, strewn everywhere and a trash bin is in a downstage corner of the quarry. M ISTER M ANIPULO is no longer wearing the smart suit and hat. He is now in a regal gown and wears a magnificent crown. At rise, ELLIOT is sorting through the garbage as M ISTER M ANIPULO observes. ELLIOT M ister M anipulo, where are we? M ISTER M ANIPULO Welcome to the quarry, kid. ELLIOT It sure is dirty. M ISTER M ANIPULO Why do you think I brought you here? ELLIOT But you said I could do what I want! M ISTER M ANIPULO I lied. And while were on the subject of lies, I should probably tell you that my name isnt really M ister M anipulo. I just use that name cause the kids think its cool. M y real name is Flavius Fluhma. ELLIOT Flavius Fluhma? What kinda lame name is that? FLAVIUS Is that any way to talk to the ruler of Cerelia? Dont worry, kid. Ill overlook it this once. Just dont do it again. ELLIOT I wanna go home!

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FLAVIUS Of course you do! Im not an unreasonable man. All I ask is that you pick up the trash and put it in this bin. As soon as youre finished, off you go. ELLIOT You want me to pick up trash? Thats easy! I have to pick up trash all the time at home. FLAVIUS Go to it then. ELLIOT starts picking up the trash and depositing it into the garbage bin. This action is underscored by music, a variation of WELL PUT THE CREAM IN TEAM WORK. When ELLIOT disposes of the last piece of trash, he beams at FLAVIUS. ELLIOT All done! FLAVIUS Oh really? Look again. FLAVIUS snaps his fingers and more trash pours down from the sky. M usic glissandos to a thud. ELLIOT Hey! Thats not fair! FLAVIUS Get used to it, kid. Well, Id better be off. Ive got some business to attend to. Big day tomorrow. Very big day. Ta ta! There is a flash of smoke and FLAVIUS is gone. ELLIOT tries to run off but is bounced back into the quarry by an invisible wall. He mimes feeling his way around the barrier and gives up. ELLIOT And I thought Joan was bad.

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ELLIOT starts to pick up the trash again as the music plays again. When he drops the last piece of trash in the bin, he celebrates a moment of victory. And then more fresh trash rains down from the sky. M usic stops. ELLIOT Ill never get home! CALLIOPE (OFF STAGE) Not with that attitude. ELLIOT Hey! Whos there? A female cat saunters onto the stage. Her name is CALLIOPE CATTERWALL. She poses and begins to clean herself. ELLIOT strokes her fur. CALLIOPE is elegant in speech and movement. ELLIOT Hi, cat. You dont know how to get out of here, do you? CALLIOPE As a matter of fact, I do. ELLIOT reacts and backs away. ELLIOT Whoa! You can talk! CALLIOPE Of course I can, darling. Im multi-lingual. All cats are. ELLIOT I didnt know that. Whats your name? CALLIOPE Calliope Catterwall, dear. And you are? ELLIOT Elliot. So you can help me get out of here?

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CALLIOPE I have the ability. The question is whether or not I choose to help you. ELLIOT Why wouldnt you help me? CALLIOPE Whats in it for me? ELLIOT I dont have anything youd want. CALLIOPE Pity. I suppose I should be on my way. (She starts to exit and stops) Unless... ELLIOT Unless what? CALLIOPE Well, darling, if you must know Ive simply been dying for a nice dish of cream. But theres none to be found around here. ELLIOT Where is it? CALLIOPE That mean, old, nasty Flavius Fluhma has it all locked away at the Castle Forlorn in the capital city. ELLIOT Ive never heard of the Castle Forlorn. CALLIOPE Of course you havent! But I could take you there. It is dangerous, but so is this place. All Id want in return is a little cream. Well, a lot, really. (Licks lips) ELLIOT But I cant get out of the quarry! Flavius told me all I had to do was pick up the trash and put it in the bin, and I could go home. But every time I finish, more trash drops from the sky.

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CALLIOPE Hes a sly one, that Flavius. Thats how he stole the crown in the first place. ELLIOT What? CALLIOPE First things first. Weve got to get you out of here. And youre in luck. You see, Flaviuss magic works specifically on the victims for whom it was intended. That means you, dear. Get it? ELLIOT Uh uh. (M USIC CUE) CALLIOPE Dont worry. Ill walk you through it. WELL PUT THE CREAM IN TEAM WORK CALLIOPE SO YOU WANT TO GET HOM E AND I WANT A DISH OF CREAM . THOUGH OUR AIM S ARE QUITE DIVERSE, THEY ARE CLOSER THAN THEY SEEM . WHAT LUCK! (spoken) M ake sense? ELLIOT Not really. CALLIOPE Hmm. Lets try again. (sings) I CAN HELP YOU FLEE THIS PLACE IF YOU HELP M E FEED M Y FACE. ITS A CASE OF QUID-PRO-QUO. IF YOU DONT, THEN YOU DONT GO! YOURE STUCK.

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ELLIOT But I dont wanna go to the Castle Forlorn! Cant you just help me? CALLIOPE Darling, thats not how it works. Listen closely. (sings) WELL PUT THE CREAM IN TEAM WORK. YOU AND I WILL SAVE THE DAY. YOU GET TO LEAVE THE QUARRY. I GET TO SUCKLE CREM E AU LAIT. IT WONT HAPPEN LESS WE WORK TOGETHER, THICK AS THIEVES, TWO BIRDS OF A FEATHER. WELL PUT THE CREAM IN TEAM WORK. YOU AND ILL M AKE QUITE THE TEAM ! M usic continues to underscore. (spoken) So, what do you say? ELLIOT Well, alright. But I still dont see how youre going to get me out of here. CALLIOPE Simple. (She starts picking up trash and placing it in the bin.) You see, the spell Flavius cast on you makes the trash reappear every time you finish picking it up. Lucky for you, the spell doesnt extend to me. M usic intensifies until CALLIOPE picks up the final piece of trash. She hovers it over the bin. CALLIOPE Ready to go, darling? ELLIOT Lets do it! CALLIOPE drops the final piece of trash in the bin. No more trash falls from the sky.

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It worked! CALLIOPE All together now! CALLIOPE/ELLIOT WELL PUT THE CREAM IN TEAM WORK. YOU AND I WILL SAVE THE DAY. YOU/I GET TO LEAVE THE QUARRY. I/YOU GET TO SUCKLE CREM E AU LAIT. IT WONT HAPPEN LESS WE WORK TOGETHER, THICK AS THIEVES, TWO BIRDS OF A FEATHER. WELL PUT THE CREAM IN TEAM WORK. YOU AND ILL M AKE QUITE THE TEAM ! CALLIOPE After you, dear! ELLIOT steps beyond the boundary of the quarry. ELLIOT and CALLIOPE high-five. M usical stinger. BLACKOUT.

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SCENE THREE Lights rise on CALLIOPE and ELLIOT as they travel through the Forgetful Forest. It is dark and haunting, mysterious and lovely. At rise, ELLIOT has stopped to rest on a rock. It is getting dark. CALLIOPE Darling, we have to keep moving. It isnt wise to linger in the Forgetful Forest. Bad things happen here. Besides, the closer we get to the castle, the sooner I get my cream. ELLIOT But Im tired. CALLIOPE It cant be helped. M any a memory has been lost here. ELLIOT Please, Calliope. I just need to rest for a little while. Then we can go. CALLIOPE Its your memory. Youd better hope that the Forgetful Fairies dont show up. ELLIOT Whats a Forgetful Fairy? Enter FORGETFUL FAIRY 1 and FORGETFUL FAIRY 2. They are two men dressed in pretty, colorful tutus and carry dainty wands. M usic plays for the song, FORGET. CALLIOPE Oh, dear. Dont say I didnt warn you. ELLIOT Those are Forgetful Fairies? (Laughs) They look silly. FORGET

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FAIRY 1/FAIRY 2 FORGET, FORGET, FORGET, FORGET, FORGET... FORGET, FORGET, FORGET, FORGET, FORGET... M EM ORIES ARE BURDENS. LET THEM FALL AWAY. WIPE CLEAN THE SLATE AS NIGHT ENDS THE DAY... FORGET, FORGET, FORGET, FORGET, FORGET... FORGET, FORGET, FORGET, FORGET, FORGET... ELLIOT is transfixed by their magic, stares dreamily. CALLIOPE Elliot, dont listen to them! ELLIOT Elliot? Whos Elliot? FAIRY 1/FAIRY 2 RUN FREE AND WANDER. NOTHING WILL YOU M ISS. NO RESPONSIBILITY. IGNORANCE IS BLISS. FORGET, FORGET, FORGET, FORGET, FORGET... FORGET, FORGET, FORGET, FORGET... CALLIOPE interrupts and the music ends abruptly. CALLIOPE Alright! Knock it off, fairies! Fairies react. FAIRY 1 Says who?

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CALLIOPE Says me. Or would you prefer that I tear your little fairy wings to shreds with my razor sharp claws? CALLIOPE makes clawing gestures and hisses. FAIRY 1 and FAIRY 2 jump into each others arms. FAIRY 2 Im getting out of here! (Exits) FAIRY 1 Wait for me! (Exits) CALLIOPE is alone with ELLIOT. She tries to rouse him from his dream-like stupor. CALLIOPE Elliot, darling, listen to me. ELLIOT Its pretty here. CALLIOPE Look at me. Whats your name? ELLIOT I dont have a name. Will you give me one? CALLIOPE Oh, dear. I hate to do this. But you leave me no choice. CALLIOPE claws ELLIOT. He wakes from his dreamlike state. ELLIOT Ouch! That hurt! CALLIOPE Good. Do you know your name? ELLIOT Its Elliot. Duh.

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CALLIOPE You dont remember the Forgetful Fairies? ELLIOT No. They were here? CALLIOPE Yes, darling. Their magic is very powerful on children. ELLIOT Why didnt their magic work on you? CALLIOPE Im immune to their magic. All cats are. Now hurry. We must leave at once. CALLIOPE and ELLIOT start to exit but are cut off by the entrance of a young woman. She is covered in rags, her face is smudged, and she is a bit addled. Even so, she is quite beautiful. Her name is LOTTIE.

LOTTIE And a left at the tree with the moss and the spider and...oh, hello. Is this home? CALLIOPE I wouldnt know. Where is your home? LOTTIE Home? Whats home? (Sees ELLIOT) Ooh, what a pretty, little boy... LOTTIE crosses to ELLIOT. He hides behind CALLIOPE. CALLIOPE looks at LOTTIE trying to figure out how she knows her. ELLIOT Stay away from me! LOTTIE Dont be afraid. Lottie likes to play with toys.

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ELLIOT Im not a toy. Im a boy. LOTTIE Toy, boy, tree, flea. Its all the same to me! LOTTIE giggles and jumps up and down like a child. CALLIOPE Wait! I know you. Why, youre Princess Pinderghast! LOTTIE M y names Lottie. I dont know any princesses. CALLIOPE But you are! Elliot, before Flavius Fluhma took control of Cerelia, the Pinderghast family were the rulers. They were kind and generous, and well-beloved, but Flavius all but wiped them out. And this woman is the princess, the rightful heir to the throne. We have to help her remember. ELLIOT She sure is pretty. LOTTIE Boring! Going now. LOTTIE starts to exit. CALLIOPE stops her. CALLIOPE Sorry, your highness. I have to do this. CALLIOPE claws LOTTIE. LOTTIE giggles. LOTTIE That tickles! Do it again! CALLIOPE Oh, this is serious. ELLIOT Princess, dont you remember anything?

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LOTTIE Of course I do, silly. Im on my way to visit my friend, Percy. Or is it Lottie? No, wait. Thats me! (Giggles) CALLIOPE Its useless, darling. Shell never remember. ELLIOT No! We cant give up. (M USIC CUE) CALLIOPE Its sweet that you want to help her. But its too late. ELLIOT Calliope, shes lost. Like me. Please. She reminds me of my mother. KINDLE THE M EM ORY ELLIOT (TO CALLIOPE) ITS NEVER TOO LATE TO UNDO WHATS BEEN DONE. IF YOU M AKE A M ISTAKE, THATS NO REASON TO RUN. WE M UST KINDLE HER M EM ORY. HELP M E KINDLE HER M EM ORY. CALLIOPE Elliot, dear... ELLIOT (TO LOTTIE) THERE IS SOM ETHING INSIDE YOU WANTING TO GET OUT. IF YOU CAN JUST FOCUS, I KNOW IT. THERES NO DOUBT... WE WILL KINDLE YOUR M EM ORY. HELP US KINDLE YOUR M EM ORY.

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LOTTIE Pretty song... ELLIOT ITS WORTH FIGHTING FOR WHAT YOUVE LOST. IF YOU QUIT BEFORE YOU START, YOU PAY THE BIGGEST COST. (spoken) Lottie, who is Percy? LOTTIE seems more aware, as if she is starting to break free of the forests magic. LOTTIE HES FUNNY. HES PRICKLY. AND I FEAR HE M IGHT BE SICKLY. HE NEEDS M E... CALLIOPE Elliot, I think its working. LOTTIE HES CAPTIVE. HES FRETFUL. AND IM FEELING LESS FORGETFUL. YES....PERCY! (spoken) Percy Pricklepuss. M y royal advisor. Oh, no. The castle. Flavius. M y family. Hes all thats left. (ELLIOT nods in recognition) We have to help him! Before its too late. ELLIOT Lets go!

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ELLIOT/LOTTIE/CALLIOPE ITS NEVER TOO LATE TO UNDO WHATS BEEN DONE. IF YOU M AKE A M ISTAKE, THATS NO EXCUSE TO RUN! JUST KINDLE THE M EM ORY. FIGHT WITH EVERY BREATH AND YOU CAN KINDLE THE M EM ORY! LOTTIE Thank you, little boy. And thank you, my brave feline friend. CALLIOPE No thanks are necessary. Lead the way, your highness. LOTTIE Please. Call me Lottie. M usic comes to an end as the trio exit. BLACKOUT.

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SCENE FOUR Throne room of the Castle Forlorn on the next day. FLAVIUS FLUHM A is looking into a magnificent crystal ball. He has been observing the events that led to ELLIOTs escape from the quarry up until his, LOTTIEs, and CALLIOPEs escape from the Forgetful Forest. At rise, FLAVIUS FLUHM A is throwing a tantrum. FLAVIUS No! No! No! It isnt bad enough that the kid escaped from the quarry. I can even get past the fact that he had a pesky cat helping him through the Forgetful Forest! But I will not stand idly by while they help the Princess regain her throne. Where are my Fluhma Guards when I need them? Pete! Garth! Get in here! Now! FLUHM A GUARD 1 (PETE) and FLUHM A GUARD 2 (GARTH) scramble in. They are hideous beasts in armor, oafish and slow. PETE Here we are, boss. GARTH Something wrong, boss? FLAVIUS Wrong? What could be wrong? I know! Princess Pinderghast and those two fools are on their way to the castle. If Lottie enters the throne room before midnight, I am finished. Do you hear me? Finished! PETE Sure, boss. We heard you. GARTH Yeah. You were shouting. FLAVIUS Im surrounded by morons. Its my own fault, really. Pete. Garth. Listen closely. Elliot and his friends are in the Plentiful Plains. I want you to get him and bring him here.

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FLAVIUS (CONT) And only him. Hell be the perfect bait to trap Lottie and that felonious feline. No one is going to take my crown...or my cream! PETE Well get him, boss. Well get him good. FLAVIUS I mean, it is my cream. Do you know how many cows I milked to make it? GARTH Yeah, boss. A lot. FLAVIUS Hundreds! Hundreds of hundreds! When you milk that many cows, you get a little territorial. PETE Right, boss. We should probably be... FLAVIUS Is it wrong for a man to care about the quality of his product? Its not like I tug on an udder, and poof, it turns into cream! It takes time. Thats all Im saying. It takes time. GARTH Um, boss. The kid? FLAVIUS Right. The kid. Wait. Before you go, did you bring the porcupine up from his cell? GARTH Just like you said, boss. Hes waiting outside. FLAVIUS Good, good. Show him in. PETE goes off and returns with PERCY PRICKLEPUSS in tow. PERCY is in shackles, and is a good deal more dirty than he was at the top of the show.

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PERCY Well, well, well. If it isnt Flavius Fluhma. Or should I call you the M ilk M an? FLAVIUS Dont you dare use that name in front of me. PERCY What do you want? FLAVIUS M y, you are prickly. And here I thought youd welcome the change of scenery. Thats gratitude. PERCY I will be more than happy to leave my prison when the Princess has returned to the throne. FLAVIUS It isnt going to happen, Pricklepuss! You made a big mistake when you let it slip that I had to keep Lottie away from the throne room until after midnight tonight. PERCY Did I? Or did I merely reveal to you the circumstances of your destruction? GARTH He got you there, boss. FLAVIUS Silence! Percy, I have to know. What will happen if Lottie enters the throne room before midnight? PERCY The wheels are already in motion, you villain. Its not a matter of if, only when. You may as well say farewell to your crown...and your cream! FLAVIUS No! (M USIC CUE) If you will not help me, prepare to face my wrath. GARTH Better help him, Percy. His wrath isnt pretty.

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PETE Come to think of it, neither is the rest of him. PETE and GARTH laugh. PERCY Face it, Flavius. It doesnt matter how you came by your power. Youre going to lose it. You will always be a lowly milk man. FLUHM A FLUHM A FLUHM A FLAVIUS Wanna bet? (sings) M Y FATHER WAS A M ILK M AN, AT LEAST THATS WHAT I THOUGHT. BUT THEN ONE DAY I WAS M ILKING COWS, AND IT TURNED OUT ALL FOR NAUGHT. A BEGGAR M AN APPROACHED M E WITH A TALE THAT M ADE M E TWITCH. SEEM S M Y DADDY WAS A WARLOCK AND M Y M AM A WAS A WITCH. SO HE HANDED M E THIS M AGIC WAND AND TAUGHT M E SUCH A WORD THAT BENT NATURE TO M Y WILL AND FRIGHTENED ALL WHO HEARD... FLUHM A FLUHM A FLUHM A ITS RIDICULOUS BUT TRUE. FLUHM A FLUHM A FLUHM A BETTER WATCH OUT WHAT YOU DO. I COULD GIVE YOU WINGS OR TWO LEFT FEET OR TURN YOU INTO STONE. FLUHM A FLUHM A FLUHM A I CONTROL ALL FLESH AND BONE!

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PERCY Youll never succeed, Flavius. I have already foreseen your downfall. It is written in the night sky. FLAVIUS The stars in the sky have no power over me! Tell him, boys! PETE/GARTH FLUHM A FLUHM A FLUHM A ITS RIDICULOUS BUT TRUE. FLUHM A FLUHM A FLUHM A BETTER WATCH OUT WHAT YOU DO. HE COULD GIVE YOU WINGS OR TWO LEFT FEET OR TURN YOU INTO STONE. FLUHM A FLUHM A FLUHM A HE CONTROLS ALL FLESH AND BONE! M usic segues to INCANTATION as FLAVIUS points his wand at PERCY. FLAVIUS Last chance, Percy. Tell me what I need to know to stop Lottie. PERCY Never, Flavius. Do your worst. INCANTATION (REPRISE) FLAVIUS YOUVE SEALED YOUR FATE. I TRIED TO PLAY NICE, BUT NO! I GAVE YOU A CHOICE, AND YOUD RATHER ROT DOWN BELOW! FARALLA PALLALLA YOURE GETTING WHATS COM ING TO YOU. FAREWELL, M Y FRIEND, I GUESS THIS IS THE END. BRACE YOURSELF FOR WHAT I HAVE IN STORE FOR YOU! (spoken) Fluhma! Fluhma! Fluhma!

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Blinding lights flash the audience and blackout. When the lights return to normal, PERCY appears frozen. PETE Neat, boss. What did you do? FLAVIUS Hes petrified. Return him to his cell at once. And bring me the boy! PETE and GARTH exit with PERCY. FLAVIUS This ends tonight. BLACKOUT.

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SCENE FIVE The Plentiful Plains at dusk. The colors of the plains are breathtaking hues of golden, lavender, with hints of crimson in the sunset. At rise, ELLIOT, CALLIOPE, and LOTTIE are making their way through the Plentiful Plains en route to the castle. LOTTIE Flavius renamed my castle? But Pinderghast Castle had such a nice ring to it! CALLIOPE Lottie, dear. Flavius wasnt going to leave any reminders of the Pinderghast name. Just be grateful he didnt change the name to Castle Fluhma. LOTTIE Good point. ELLIOT How much further? LOTTIE Not much longer now. Id forgotten how beautiful the Plentiful Plains are. I used to play here as a child, not much younger than you, Elliot. ELLIOT I think itd be cool to be a prince. I bet you didnt have people telling you what to do all the times. Chores and bedtimes. LOTTIE Of course I did. How else was I going to learn to be responsible? ELLIOT You had chores? LOTTIE They were probably different from the ones you have, but yes. I suppose all children do. Is it really so bad doing chores?

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ELLIOT I guess not. CALLIOPE I think hes sweet on you. ELLIOT I am not! LOTTIE Calliope, leave him alone. CALLIOPE He said you reminded him of his mother. LOTTIE Thats sweet. What is she like, Elliot? ELLIOT I dont remember. She died when I was very young. I just remember that she was always in a lot of pain. LOTTIE Im sorry to hear that. Well, she would be very proud of your bravery. LOTTIE smiles. CALLIOPE takes a deep, long whiff of the air. CALLIOPE I can almost smell the cream in the air. Lets hurry up already. This kitty has to make up for lost time. LOTTIE You have my word, Calliope. All the cream in the castle will be at your disposal. We just have to get in first. ELLIOT How hard could it be to get into a castle? LOTTIE I do know a few secret entrances. But Flavius is sure to have them guarded.

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CALLIOPE Right, darling. By Fluhma Guards. And I think we all know how dim-witted they are. The FLUHM A GUARDS spring onto the stage. PETE Hey! Thats no way to talk about us! GARTH Yeah. We have feelings, too! Get em! PETE and GARTH are carrying nets. CALLIOPE Elliot! Lottie! Look out, theyve got... PETE tosses a net over CALLIOPE. PETE Thats what you get for calling us names. LOTTIE Run, Elliot! Run! GARTH tosses his net over LOTTIE. GARTH I got her! I got her! PETE and GARTH close in on ELLIOT. ELLIOT Get away from me! PETE The boss wants you to come with us. ELLIOT backs into GARTH. They grab him. ELLIOT Let me go!

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CALLIOPE Leave him alone! LOTTIE Hes just a boy! PETE Not for long. Lets go. PETE and GARTH exit with a struggling ELLIOT. LOTTIE and CALLIOPE are tangled in their nets. LOTTIE We have to help him. CALLIOPE Its too late. Were trapped. Well never get out of these nets. LOTTIE Its never too late. We just have to figure a way...wait! Use your claws, Calliope! CALLIOPE Why didnt I think of that? How foolish of me, dear. CALLIOPE uses her claws and makes short work of the net. She then frees LOTTIE. LOTTIE Thank you! Lets go. We havent a moment to lose! (M USIC CUE) CALLIOPE But, Lottie. Why would they take Elliot? Why not you? LOTTIE I dont know. Its probably a trap. CALLIOPE A trap? M aybe I dont need the cream, after all. Id rather take my chances in the Forgetful Forest.

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LOTTIE No. You cant let fear control you. Elliot is counting on us! RALLY YOUR COURAGE LOTTIE A VILLAIN RULES THE LAND WITH A FIRM AND M IGHTY HAND. AND THOUGH THE OUTLOOK IS GRIM , AND WE BOTH FEAR FOR HIM , TO THE COURSE WE M UST STAY TRUE. ARE YOU WITH M E IN THIS BATTLE? OR WILL YOU RUN AWAY LIKE CATTLE? YOU HAVE NO CHOICE. THERES ONLY ONE THING YOU CAN DO... RALLY YOUR COURAGE. TAKE ONE FOR THE TEAM . AND WHEN YOUVE FOUGHT THE GOOD FIGHT, YOULL EARN THAT DISH OF CREAM . THE BATTLE LINES ARE DRAWING. ON WHICH SIDE WILL YOU WEIGH? RALLY YOUR COURAGE. WE HAVE TO SAVE THE DAY! (spoken) Calliope, are you with me? CALLIOPE Yes, your majesty. For Elliot. LOTTIE and CALLIOPE exit as music continues. We are now in the throne room of the Castle Forlorn. FLAVIUS stands quite satisfied as PETE and GARTH enter with ELLIOT. FLAVIUS Hi, kid. M iss me?

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ELLIOT Im not afraid of you! FLAVIUS You would be if you knew what I have planned for you. PETE and GARTH laugh with understanding. ELLIOT Whatre you going to do to me? FLAVIUS I dont want to spoil the surprise. (sings) IM STANDING ON THE BRINK, AND IM HOPING THERES NO KINK IN THE PLAN IVE DESIGNED. ALL THE STARS HAVE ALIGNED. THE PINDERGHAST LINE IS THROUGH! YOU COULD HELP M E IN THIS BATTLE. IM THE WINNER! LETS NOT PRATTLE. YOU HAVE NO CHOICE. THERES ONLY ONE THING YOU CAN DO... RALLY YOUR COURAGE. JOIN THE WINNING TEAM . AND WHEN YOUVE TURNED ON YOUR FRIENDS WE WILL CELEBRATE WITH CREAM . THE BATTLE LINES ARE DRAWING. ON WHICH SIDE WILL YOU WEIGH? RALLY YOUR COURAGE. WE HAVE TO SEIZE THE DAY! M usic continues as LOTTIE and CALLIOPE arrive outside the castle. LOTTIE M y castle! M y beautiful castle! Oh, how Ive missed it.

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CALLIOPE If we dont find a way inside, darling, youll be missing it permanently. LOTTIE Dont worry. I remember how to get in. Well rescue Percy and Elliot and then Ill deal with Flavius. CALLIOPE I know, I know. We have to save the day. Focus shifts back to the throne room. FLAVIUS So, kid. Whats it going to be? Friend or foe? Yes or no? ELLIOT No! Ill never betray my friends! PETE/GARTH Uh oh. FLAVIUS Wrong answer. A pool of light rises on another part of the stage to reveal a petrified PERCY as the final chorus is sung. FLAVIUS RALLY YOUR COURAGE. JOIN THE WINNING TEAM . AND WHEN YOUVE TURNED ON YOUR FRIENDS WE WILL CELEBRATE WITH CREAM LOTTIE RALLY YOUR COURAGE. TAKE ONE FOR THE TEAM . AND WHEN YOUVE FOUGHT THE GOOD FIGHT YOULL EARN THAT DISH OF CREAM . THE BATTLE LINES ARE DRAWING. ON WHICH SIDE WILL YOU WEIGH? RALLY YOUR COURAGE. WE HAVE TO SAVE THE DAY.

THE BATTLE LINES ARE DRAWING. ON WHICH SIDE WILL YOU WEIGH? RALLY YOUR COURAGE. WE HAVE TO SEIZE THE DAY.

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FLAVIUS/LOTTIE SEIZE THE DAY!/SAVE THE DAY! FLAVIUS Take him away! BLACKOUT.

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SCENE SIX The prison in the Castle Forlorn. It is dirty and lonely. A bit of moonlight from the Cerelian moon shines through the bars of a window. PERCY is still there, quite petrified. At rise, PETE and GARTH enter with ELLIOT. PETE Welcome to your new home. GARTH Yeah. (Laughs) Home. ELLIOT Ill get out of here! Calliope and Lottie will rescue me! And then Im going to my real home. GARTH Home. That sure does sound nice. PETE Garth. Dont start. ELLIOT You mean youre not from Cerelia? GARTH Nope. ELLIOT Where are you from then? PETE No more questions. Do yourself a favor. Try and behave, or youll end up like us. ELLIOT But...

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PETE Uh uh. Believe me. If youre lucky, youll never get out of here. PETE and GARTH exit. ELLIOT Wait! What do you mean end up like you? (Looking around) It sure is icky in here. It smells funny. (Sees PERCY) Percy! Lottie is going to be glad to see you. (Notices PERCY is frozen) Percy. What did they do to you? (He touches PERCY. No effect.) Its going to be alright. Youll see. Lottie and Calliope will rescue us. Theyll know what to do. (ELLIOT sits next to PERCY and cradles him.) This is my fault, isnt it? Calliope and Lottie could be walking into a trap because of me. And youre all frozen, and I dont know what to do. (M USIC CUE) IF ID ONLY ELLIOT IF ID ONLY GOTTEN READY FOR BED, IF ID ONLY DONE THE THINGS THAT JOAN SAID, IF ID ONLY TRIED TO PLAY BY THE RULES, THINGS WOULD BE SO DIFFERENT. IF ID ONLY BEEN LESS FOCUSED ON FUN, IF ID ONLY BEEN A M UCH BETTER SON, IF ID ONLY BEEN A PRINCE, NOT A FOOL, THINGS WOULD BE SO DIFFERENT. YOU ARE FROZEN HERE, AND SO AM I WITH FEAR. LETS M AKE IT THROUGH THE NIGHT, SO WE CAN FACE THE DAY AND FIGHT THE GOOD FIGHT. IF ID ONLY NOT BEFRIENDED A CAT, IF ID ONLY BEEN M UCH LESS OF A RAT, IF ID ONLY HAD M Y M OTHER WITH M E, THINGS WOULD BE SO DIFFERENT. IF ID ONLY HELPED M Y FRIENDS IN THE PLAINS, IF ID ONLY KNOWN HOW TO STOP HER PAINS, IF ID ONLY TRIED TO NOT DISAGREE,

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THINGS WOULD BE SO DIFFERENT. TELL M E WHAT TO DO, AND I WILL FOLLOW THROUGH. THE FIGHTINGS NOT BEGUN, SO THERE IS STILL TIM E BEFORE WERE UNDONE. IF ID ONLY.... IF ID ONLY.... IF ID ONLY.... M usic ends. ELLIOT cries. His tears fall on PERCY. Tinkling sounds like wind-chimes play as ELLIOTs tears fall on PERCY. A light shines on PERCY and he begins to move. ELLIOT Percy? Can you hear me? PERCY slowly rises as the sound of the chimes crescendos and fades with the light. PERCY takes in his surroundings and ELLIOT. PERCY I suppose I have you to thank for this. ELLIOT I didnt do anything. PERCY It was your tears. Youre not the same boy who first came to Cerelia. Youve grown. Everything youve come to know couldnt be contained inside your body. And so you cried tears. Its alright. There is much magic in them. ELLIOT M agic in my tears? Cool. PERCY We still have to figure our way out of here. You dont happen to have a spare set of keys in your tear ducts?

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ELLIOT I dont think so. PERCY It was too much to hope for. There is a noise at the door. ELLIOT Oh, no! The Fluhma Guards! PERCY This could be our chance. The Fluhma Guards still think I am petrified. If you can distract them, theyll never see me coming. ELLIOT Ill try. PERCY Youll do fine. PERCY returns to his frozen stance. The door opens. In rush CALLIOPE and LOTTIE. ELLIOT Calliope! Lottie! CALLIOPE Darling, youre safe! PERCY rises from the floor.

PERCY Your majesty, you have returned. LOTTIE Yes, Percy, Im here. We have Elliot to thank for that. LOTTIE and PERCY embrace.

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PERCY Indeed. He is full of surprises. ELLIOT What do we do now? CALLIOPE I dont know about you, but I have a date with a dish of cream. LOTTIE Really, Calliope? CALLIOPE Sorry. PERCY Your highness, it is almost midnight. We must get you to the throne room, or Flaviuss power over Cerelia will be absolute. LOTTIE I dont understand. What can we do? PERCY Ill explain on the way. Hurry! PERCY leads the group out of the prison. BLACKOUT.

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SCENE SEVEN Throne room of the Castle Forlorn. It is approaching midnight. At rise, FLAVIUS FLUHM A is gloating to PETE and GARTH. FLAVIUS Its almost midnight! (Laughs maniacally) You done good, boys! Elliot is in prison with that petrified porcupine. Lottie and that cream-crazy cat are nowhere to be seen. And very soon my authority over Cerelia will be absolute. Well, until I find a suitable queen and she gives birth to a son, who will undoubtedly usurp my power...as is tradition. Where was I? Oh, yes! Boys, put on your party hats! PETE and GARTH put on festive, party hats. GARTH Um, boss. Can I ask you something? FLAVIUS M ake it quick, Garth. M y destiny is upon us. GARTH After you become all-powerful or whatever, can me and Pete go home? FLAVIUS Home? Home! Why would you want to do a thing like that? PETE He misses his mommy. GARTH Yeah. I miss my mommy. FLAVIUS After all Ive done for you, this is how you repay me. Thats gratitude. (M ocks) I wanna go home! I miss my mommy! Whaa! Whaa! Whaa! Sorry, boys. Out of the question. If I let you two go, the rest of the Fluhma Guards will want to jump ship. Isnt going to happen.

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PETE But... FLAVIUS End of discussion, Pete. Or would you prefer to go back to the quarry? PETE No, boss. FLAVIUS I thought so. Clock bells start to chime. It is midnight. One. Two. Three. FLAVIUS Yes. Yes! Ive won! Four. Five. Six. Seven. Eight. FLAVIUS A new day is dawning, boys. Brace yourselves. Nine. Ten. Eleven. LOTTIE bursts through the doors of the throne room with ELLIOT, CALLIOPE, and PERCY. LOTTIE Not so fast, Flavius! The twelfth bell chimes. FLAVIUS Youre too late, Princess! Cerelia, all of it, is now mine! And dont even think about touching a drop of my cream, kitty! CALLIOPE Not even a little? PERCY Think again, M ilk M an! The Princess arrived before the stroke of midnight. Youre finished. The Pinderghast family is back in power.

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FLAVIUS Didnt I petrify you? LOTTIE Obviously not well enough. FLAVIUS No matter. I wont make the same mistake twice. (M USIC CUE) INCANTATION FLAVIUS I TURNED YOU TO STONE, BUT THIS TIM E THERES NO SAVING YOU! YOUR ASHES WILL DANCE ON THE WIND WHEN IM THROUGH WITH YOU! FORALLA PALLALLA YOURE GETTING WHATS COM ING TO YOU! FAREWELL, YOU LOT! YOUR DAY THIS IS NOT. BRACE YOURSELVES! THIS IS THE END FOR ALL OF YOU! Lights go crazy. The music is frenetic. PETE and GARTH hold each other in fear. (spoken) Fluhma! Fluhma! Fluhma! M usic glissandos to a thud. Lights fizzle back to normal levels. Nothing happens. ELLIOT Is that it? FLAVIUS shakes his wand. FLAVIUS The blasted thing must be defective. (Aims again) Fluhma! Fluhma! Fluhma! Nothing happens. PERCY You were saying? (M USIC CUE)

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LOTTIE is shifting uneasily. The lighting changes and a pool of light shines on her. CALLIOPE Lottie, whats happening to you? LOTTIE I dont know. I... LOTTIE should be near FLAVIUS for this next trick to work. A pool of light shines on FLAVIUS. The wand seems to pop in the air from FLAVIUSs hands, as if it is too hot for him to handle, and LOTTIE catches it. FLAVIUS cowers. SOM ETHING INSIDE M E LOTTIE SOM ETHING INSIDE M E IS WANTING TO GET OUT. SOM ETHING DELICIOUS, I WANT TO SCREAM AND SHOUT! EVIL IS VANQUISHED. YOUR RULE IS AT AN END! YOU WILL NEVER LIFT A HAND. I M UST BE CLEAR. YOU UNDERSTAND? YOUR TIM E HAS COM E. YOURE OUT, YOU BUM ! YOULL NEVER GET ANOTHER CHANCE TO HURT M Y FRIENDS! Lights go crazy as LOTTIE aims the wand at FLAVIUS. FLAVIUS Oh, Fluhma... A flashpot explodes in front of FLAVIUS. Blackout. When the lights rise, FLAVIUS is gone. PETE and GARTH are no longer monsters, but little boys again. And LOTTIEs rags have been replaced with a regal gown.

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ELLIOT Flavius! Hes gone! LOTTIE Yes, Elliot. Hes gone. PERCY Your highness, he isnt... LOTTIE Dead? Of course not, my friend. I would be no better than Flavius. No, I sent him to the one place he can never harm us again. The quarry. There he will make cream for Cerelia for the rest of his days. CALLIOPE Now thats what I call punishment. Tasty, tasty punishment. LOTTIE notices PETE and GARTH LOTTIE Well, what do we have here? PETE Garth, youre human again! GARTH So are you! They jump up and down with excitement. LOTTIE Percy, I imagine that there are many more children like these boys who must be quite confused. PERCY I will round them up personally. CALLIOPE (to ELLIOT) Happy endings all around, darling. Care to join me for some cream?

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ELLIOT But, wait! How am I going to get home? LOTTIE smiles. LOTTIE Percy? PERCY Your highness, I believe it is well within your power to send the boy home. PETE Us, too? PERCY Yes. You as well. LOTTIE Ill see what I can do. Im a little new at this. LOTTIE aims the wand at the throne room doors. Green light glows from under and around it. ELLIOT What do we do? LOTTIE You just walk through the door, sweet boy. And you will be home. ELLIOT Thank you, Lottie! Thank you so much. He hugs her. PETE/GARTH Yes! Thank you! ELLIOT crosses to the door. LOTTIE Elliot, this is goodbye.

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ELLIOT Wont I ever see you again? LOTTIE Im afraid not. ELLIOT But youre my friends. LOTTIE I know. It isnt easy. But goodbyes are a part of life. PETE Thank you, Princess. (To GARTH) Were going home now. Home. GARTH Yeah. Home. PETE and GARTH exit through the doors and green lights spill onto the stage. CALLIOPE Gee, dear. Im going to miss you. ELLIOT Yeah. M e, too. PERCY Boy. It is time. ELLIOT holds onto CALLIOPE. ELLIOT I dont want to. LOTTIE Oh, Elliot... IT ISNT EASY

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LOTTIE IT ISNT EASY TO DO THE RIGHT THING, NO M ATTER THE SORROW OR THE PAIN THAT IT BRINGS. YOU HAVE TO LET GO. THERE ARE DOORS TO WALK THROUGH. NO, IT ISNT EASY. BUT I WONT FORGET YOU. ELLIOT IT ISNT EASY BUT ILL DO M Y CHORES. ILL LEAVE ALL THIS BEAUTY AND ILL WALK THROUGH THE DOOR. ILL TRY TO DO BETTER THAN I USED TO DO. NO, IT ISNT EASY. BUT I WONT FORGET YOU. CALLIOPE WE M ADE QUITE THE TEAM ELLIOT NOW YOULL GET THAT DISH OF CREAM CALLIOPE I WOULD TRADE IT ALL IF YOU COULD JUST STAY HERE. ELLIOT (spoken) I wouldnt ask you to. PERCY NO, IT ISNT EASY TO STAND UP TO VILLAINS, TO FIGHT OFF THE FLUHM AS, OR TO LEAVE WHEN YOURE UNWILLIN.

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ELLIOT NO, IT ISNT EASY TO GIVE UP YOUR M OTHER, OR TO LOVE ANOTHER, WHEN SOM ETIM ES YOU FEEL SM OTHERED... PERCY/CALLIOPE/LOTTIE NO, IT ISNT EASY. NO, ITS NEVER EASY. GOODBYES ARENT EASY. BUT WELL HOLD ONTO YOU IN ALL WE SAY AND DO, AND YOU WILL CARRY US WITH YOU. PERCY GOOD LIFE. CALLIOPE GOOD LUCK. LOTTIE GOODBYE. ELLIOT GOODBYE. ELLIOT walks to the door, turns around and waves. They wave back in reply. ELLIOT walks through the door. BLACKOUT. THE END.