Rizal's First Love When Rizal returned to Manila to pursue his studies, he found h i m s e l f disoriented.

There was a great contrast between the ambiance at the Ateneoand the boarding house in Intramuros, which was administered by a priest.It was during this period that he experienced his first love.One day, while at his grandmother's place, he met a young girl of 14 namedSegunda Katigbak, who turned out to be the sister of his friend. He fell inlove with her, but she was already engaged. He found out subsequently, thatSegunda went to the same college where a sisters of his stayed as boarder.The two friends went together to visit their sisters, who had become friends.Although Rizal tried to keep away, in difference to her being engaged, thec o q u e t r y , t h e g r a c e a n d t h e e n d o w m e n t s o f S e g u n d a h a d c o m p l e t e l y captivated him, and this can be deduced from his own description of the girl:"Her looks were terribly overwhelming. So sweet and expressive were her eyes, her voice so melodious and all her actions invariably accompanied by acertain charm."Rizal made a pencil sketch of her, She embroidered a rose on his hatband.T he a ff ai r p ro g res se d , t he l i t t le i nc id e nts t yp i c a l o f l o ve rs went o n, unt i l without any pressure on the part of Jose, she broke with her fianc and theycontinued seeing each other under very proper circumstances. It should beremembered that in those days Filipino society was very strict and rigorous,and frowned upon amorous adventures. From among the long, loving tte--ttes between the lovers, we picked up one remark of Rizal. "Death might dome a lot of good." The topic of death cropped up at the age of eighteen and,like a refrain was repeated throughout his life, a recurrent manifestation of his chronic depression. Before Christmas vacation that year, the two had alast meeting during which, in spite of the skills and wiles of Segunda, Josedid not propose. They left separately within two successive days, with theagreement that they would see each other when Segunda passed throughCalamba. But when her coach crossed the town, he just lifted his hat. Sheresponded with a smile waving her handkerchief, but the timid Rizal did notdare approach her. Because of this indecision, he lost the love of Segunda.