10. Better weapons for the police.

Accessories are vitally important to any outfit, and when your wheels are this cool, you need to look the part. Desert Eagles, .50 caliber sniper rifles, and hand grenades should be standard issue. Very cool indeed. 11. Towing out cruisers after the cops flip and crash them. 12. Sends a message: We are going to kick ass and take names later. 13. Precedent. Once we already have the BearCat the sky's the limit for what we can get away with. An M1 Abrams tank, an A11 Warthog flying fortress, gas chambers, you name it we'll get to have a blast (or a gas) with it. 14. Promoting the Keene area and tourism. The overwhelming majority of communities won't be as well prepared, and their police chiefs and public officials will cite Keene as an example, and many people will hear about our town because of it.

15. Federalizes the police force. As demonstrated by the Mexican federales the centralization of power limits corruption and increases competence. 16. Could serve to give extra protection to large illegal drug shipments passing through or into Keene. 17. Economic stimulus we are going to have to spend money on maintaining, fueling, and upgrading the BearCat. 18. Killdozer II. In order to help their cronies the city government could use regulations and codes to drive a small businessman out of business, inspiring him to weld together a homemade tank and go on a massive rampage. It's happened before and it'll happen again. 19. Police and government egos will be fed. This makes them easier to deal with. It's best to stop resisting. 20. The spacious interior will provide a nice out of sight place for cops to smoke a joint. 21. All the cool kids are doing it.

Top 10 Reasons

Keene
Needs a Bearcat
1. Medical marijuana patients. Terminally ill people are desperate to relieve their suffering and they have nothing left to lose. It's only a matter of time before one of them decides to take a few cops down with them. 2. Muslims. They hate us for our pumpkins. 3. Mother nature - the oldest serial killer known to mankind. She's out for revenge and won't rest until the streets of Keene run with blood.

4. It's a secret. You aren't trustworthy enough for us to tell you. Just trust your government. 5. Survivalists & Preppers. These people think they should be allowed to survive catastrophes without depending on the beneficence of the state and they won't go down without a fight. 6. Misguided patriots. Real patriots know real patriotism is obeying the government, but some crazy fools think they should be able to live their own lives without government permission slips or super-intelligent and ultra competent bureaucrats micromanaging every bit of their lives. They must be annihilated at any cost. 7. Wild Wild West. New Hampshire has open carry, concealed carry, and absolutely no knife laws. Our state is going to turn into an old Western film or pulp novel. Any time now. 8. The unknown. Pirates, aliens, trolls, there are so many things to go wrong.

9. The apocalypse. When the shit hits the fan our public officials will need a powerful armored off road vehicle to make sure that they get to their safe houses paid for by taxdollars. 10. School shootings. Should the active shooter not deactivate himself before the police arrive on the scene it is imperative that they have proper cover to hide behind until he finishes his murder spree and offs himself. 11. Soccer moms. When little Johnie gets a chronic head cold and Mommy buys him the cold medicine that works then it's time for the friendly policeman to put Mommy in jail for buying meth ingredients, and everyone knows how mothers are when you get in between them and their kids. 12. Animals! There are bears in those woods (don't tell Stephen Colbert), and the circus does come to town and you never know when an elephant is going to go on a rampage.

21 Public Benefits of a LENCO BearCat 1. Political dissidents can have an accident that mysteriously crushes their skull under its wheel. This works well in China and it will work well here. 2. Trash. It could be a bomb. 3. Grand Theft Auto III style massacre of the riff raff downtown. 4. Death squads. These have done wonders for our foreign policy, now it is time for them to do the same for domestic policy. 5. National security. 6. Photo opportunities for local politicians: they make us all look good. 7. It can frighten small children, possibly discouraging them from using drugs. 8. It will make the drug users nervous. Anything that helps ruin the lives of those who use drugs not approved by the wise men of the legislature is a positive contribution to a peaceful society. 9. Impresses chicks.