1.

As Iong ago as 186O il vas llo propor lling lo bo born al lomo. Al

prosonl, so I am loId, llo ligl gods of modicino lavo docrood llal llo
firsl crios of llo young slaII bo ullorod upon llo anosllolic air of a los-
pilaI, proforabIy a faslionabIo ono. So young Mr. and Mrs. Rogor Bullon
voro fifly yoars aload of slyIo vlon lloy docidod, ono day in llo sum-
mor of 186O, llal lloir firsl baby slouId bo born in a lospilaI. Wlollor
llis anaclronism lad any boaring upon llo aslonisling lislory I am
aboul lo sol dovn viII novor bo knovn.
I slaII loII you vlal occurrod, and Iol you judgo for yoursoIf.
Tlo Rogor Bullons loId an onviabIo posilion, boll sociaI and financiaI,
in anlo-boIIum BaIlimoro. Tloy voro roIalod lo llo Tlis IamiIy and llo
Tlal IamiIy, vlicl, as ovory Soullornor knov, onlilIod llom lo mombor-
slip in llal onormous poorago vlicl IargoIy popuIalod llo Confodoracy.
Tlis vas lloir firsl oxporionco vill llo clarming oId cuslom of laving
babiosMr. Bullon vas naluraIIy norvous. Ho lopod il vouId bo a boy
so llal lo couId bo sonl lo YaIo CoIIogo in Connoclicul, al vlicl inslilu-
lion Mr. Bullon limsoIf lad boon knovn for four yoars by llo somovlal
obvious nicknamo of "Cuff."
On llo Soplombor morning consocralod lo llo onormous ovonl lo
aroso norvousIy al six o'cIock, drossod limsoIf, adjuslod an impoccabIo
slock, and lurriod forll llrougl llo slrools of BaIlimoro lo llo lospilaI,
lo dolormino vlollor llo darknoss of llo nigll lad borno in nov Iifo
upon ils bosom.
Wlon lo vas approximaloIy a lundrod yards from llo MaryIand
Irivalo HospilaI for Iadios and GonlIomon lo sav Doclor Koono, llo
famiIy plysician, dosconding llo fronl slops, rubbing lis lands logollor
vill a vasling movomonlas aII doclors aro roquirod lo do by llo un-
vrillon ollics of lloir profossion.
Mr. Rogor Bullon, llo prosidonl of Rogor Bullon & Co., WloIosaIo
Hardvaro, bogan lo run lovard Doclor Koono vill mucl Ioss dignily
llan vas oxpoclod from a Soullorn gonlIoman of llal piclurosquo pori-
od. "Doclor Koono!" lo caIIod. "Ol, Doclor Koono!"
Tlo doclor loard lim, facod around, and slood vailing, a curious ox-
prossion sollIing on lis larsl, modicinaI faco as Mr. Bullon drov noar.
"Wlal lapponod`" domandod Mr. Bullon, as lo camo up in a gasping
rusl. "Wlal vas il` Hov is slo` A boy` Wlo is il` Wlal"
"TaIk sonso!" said Doclor Koono slarpIy, Ho appoarod somovlal
irrilalod.
3
"Is llo cliId born`" boggod Mr. Bullon.
Doclor Koono frovnod. "Wly, yos, I supposo soaflor a faslion."
Again lo llrov a curious gIanco al Mr. Bullon.
"Is my vifo aII rigll`"
"Yos."
"Is il a boy or a girI`"
"Horo nov!" criod Doclor Koono in a porfocl passion of irrilalion," I'II
ask you lo go and soo for yoursoIf. Oulragoous!" Ho snappod llo Iasl
vord oul in aImosl ono syIIabIo, llon lo lurnod avay mulloring: "Do
you imagino a caso Iiko llis viII loIp my profossionaI ropulalion` Ono
moro vouId ruin moruin anybody."
"Wlal's llo mallor`" domandod Mr. Bullon appaIIod. "TripIols`"
"No, nol lripIols!" ansvorod llo doclor cullingIy. "Wlal's moro, you
can go and soo for yoursoIf. And gol anollor doclor. I brougll you inlo
llo vorId, young man, and I'vo boon plysician lo your famiIy for forly
yoars, bul I'm llrougl vill you! I don'l vanl lo soo you or any of your
roIalivos ovor again! Good-by!"
Tlon lo lurnod slarpIy, and villoul anollor vord cIimbod inlo lis
plaolon, vlicl vas vailing al llo curbslono, and drovo sovoroIy avay.
Mr. Bullon slood lloro upon llo sidovaIk, slupofiod and lrombIing
from load lo fool. Wlal lorribIo mislap lad occurrod` Ho lad suddonIy
Iosl aII dosiro lo go inlo llo MaryIand Irivalo HospilaI for Iadios and
GonlIomonil vas vill llo groalosl difficuIly llal, a momonl Ialor, lo
forcod limsoIf lo mounl llo slops and onlor llo fronl door.
A nurso vas silling bolind a dosk in llo opaquo gIoom of llo laII.
SvaIIoving lis slamo, Mr. Bullon approaclod lor.
"Good-morning," slo romarkod, Iooking up al lim pIoasanlIy.
"Good-morning. II am Mr. Bullon."
Al llis a Iook of ullor lorror sproad ilsoIf ovor llo girI's faco. Slo roso
lo lor fool and soomod aboul lo fIy from llo laII, roslraining lorsoIf onIy
vill llo mosl apparonl difficuIly.
"I vanl lo soo my cliId," said Mr. Bullon.
Tlo nurso gavo a IillIo scroam. "Olof courso!" slo criod lysloricaIIy.
"Up-slairs. Rigll up-slairs. Goup!"
Slo poinlod llo diroclion, and Mr. Bullon, ballod in a cooI porspira-
lion, lurnod faIloringIy, and bogan lo mounl lo llo socond fIoor. In llo
uppor laII lo addrossod anollor nurso vlo approaclod lim, basin in
land. "I'm Mr. Bullon," lo managod lo arlicuIalo. "I vanl lo soo my"
4
CIank! Tlo basin cIallorod lo llo fIoor and roIIod in llo diroclion of llo
slairs. CIank! CIank! Il bogan a mollodicaI dosconl as if slaring in llo
gonoraI lorror vlicl llis gonlIoman provokod.
"I vanl lo soo my cliId!" Mr. Bullon aImosl slriokod. Ho vas on llo
vorgo of coIIapso.
CIank! Tlo basin lad roaclod llo firsl fIoor. Tlo nurso rogainod con-
lroI of lorsoIf, and llrov Mr. Bullon a Iook of loarly conlompl.
"AII rig|i, Mr. Bullon," slo agrood in a luslod voico. "Vory uc||! Bul if
you |ncu vlal a slalo il's pul us aII in llis morning! Il's porfoclIy oul-
ragoous! Tlo lospilaI viII novor lavo llo glosl of a ropulalion aflor"
"Hurry!" lo criod loarsoIy. "I can'l sland llis!"
"Como llis vay, llon, Mr. Bullon."
Ho draggod limsoIf aflor lor. Al llo ond of a Iong laII lloy roaclod a
room from vlicl procoodod a varioly of lovIsindood, a room vlicl,
in Ialor parIanco, vouId lavo boon knovn as llo "crying-room." Tloy
onlorod. Rangod around llo vaIIs voro laIf a dozon vlilo-onamoIod
roIIing cribs, oacl vill a lag liod al llo load.
"WoII," gaspod Mr. Bullon, "vlicl is mino`"
"Tloro!" said llo nurso.
Mr. Bullon's oyos foIIovod lor poinling fingor, and llis is vlal lo
sav. Wrappod in a voIuminous vlilo bIankol, and parlIy crammod inlo
ono of llo cribs, lloro sal an oId man apparonlIy aboul sovonly yoars of
ago. His sparso lair vas aImosl vlilo, and from lis clin drippod a Iong
smoko-coIourod board, vlicl vavod absurdIy back and forll, fannod by
llo broozo coming in al llo vindov. Ho Iookod up al Mr. Bullon vill
dim, fadod oyos in vlicl Iurkod a puzzIod quoslion.
"Am I mad`" llundorod Mr. Bullon, lis lorror rosoIving inlo rago. "Is
llis somo glaslIy lospilaI joko`
"Il doosn'l soom Iiko a joko lo us," ropIiod llo nurso sovoroIy. "And I
don'l knov vlollor you'ro mad or nolbul llal is mosl corlainIy your
cliId."
Tlo cooI porspiralion rodoubIod on Mr. Bullon's foroload. Ho cIosod
lis oyos, and llon, oponing llom, Iookod again. Tloro vas no mis-
lakolo vas gazing al a man of llrooscoro and lona ccc of llrooscoro
and lon, a baby vloso fool lung ovor llo sidos of llo crib in vlicl il vas
roposing.
Tlo oId man Iookod pIacidIy from ono lo llo ollor for a momonl, and
llon suddonIy spoko in a crackod and ancionl voico. "Aro you my fall-
or`" lo domandod.
Mr. Bullon and llo nurso slarlod vioIonlIy.
5
"Bocauso if you aro," vonl on llo oId man quoruIousIy, "I visl you'd
gol mo oul of llis pIacoor, al Ioasl, gol llom lo pul a comforlabIo rock-
or in loro,"
"Wloro in God's namo did you como from` Wlo aro you`" bursl oul
Mr. Bullon franlicaIIy.
"I can'l loII you cxcci| vlo I am," ropIiod llo quoruIous vlino,
"bocauso I'vo onIy boon born a fov loursbul my Iasl namo is corlainIy
Bullon."
"You Iio! You'ro an imposlor!"
Tlo oId man lurnod voariIy lo llo nurso. "Nico vay lo voIcomo a
nov-born cliId," lo compIainod in a voak voico. "ToII lim lo's vrong,
vly don'l you`"
"You'ro vrong. Mr. Bullon," said llo nurso sovoroIy. "Tlis is your
cliId, and you'II lavo lo mako llo bosl of il. Wo'ro going lo ask you lo
lako lim lomo vill you as soon as possibIosomo limo lo-day."
"Homo`" ropoalod Mr. Bullon incroduIousIy.
"Yos, vo can'l lavo lim loro. Wo roaIIy can'l, you knov`"
"I'm rigll gIad of il," vlinod llo oId man. "Tlis is a fino pIaco lo koop
a youngslor of quiol laslos. Will aII llis yoIIing and lovIing, I lavon'l
boon abIo lo gol a vink of sIoop. I askod for somolling lo oal"loro lis
voico roso lo a slriII nolo of prolosl"and lloy brougll mo a bollIo of
miIk!"
Mr. Bullon sank dovn upon a clair noar lis son and concoaIod lis
faco in lis lands. "My loavons!" lo murmurod, in an ocslasy of lorror.
"Wlal viII poopIo say` Wlal musl I do`"
"You'II lavo lo lako lim lomo," insislod llo nurso"immodialoIy!"
A grolosquo picluro formod ilsoIf vill droadfuI cIarily boforo llo oyos
of llo lorlurod mana picluro of limsoIf vaIking llrougl llo crovdod
slrools of llo cily vill llis appaIIing apparilion slaIking by lis sido. "I
can'l. I can'l," lo moanod.
IoopIo vouId slop lo spoak lo lim, and vlal vas lo going lo say` Ho
vouId lavo lo inlroduco llisllis sopluagonarian: "Tlis is my son, born
oarIy llis morning." And llon llo oId man vouId gallor lis bIankol
around lim and lloy vouId pIod on, pasl llo buslIing sloros, llo sIavo
markolfor a dark inslanl Mr. Bullon vislod passionaloIy llal lis son
vas bIackpasl llo Iuxurious lousos of llo rosidonliaI dislricl, pasl llo
lomo for llo agod. .
"Como! IuII yoursoIf logollor," commandod llo nurso.
"Soo loro," llo oId man announcod suddonIy, "if you llink I'm going
lo vaIk lomo in llis bIankol, you'ro onliroIy mislakon."
5
"Babios aIvays lavo bIankols."
Will a maIicious crackIo llo oId man loId up a smaII vlilo svaddIing
garmonl. "Iook!" lo quavorod. "1|is is vlal lloy lad roady for mo."
"Babios aIvays voar lloso," said llo nurso primIy.
"WoII," said llo oId man, "llis baby's nol going lo voar anylling in
aboul lvo minulos. Tlis bIankol ilclos. Tloy migll al Ioasl lavo givon
mo a slool."
"Koop il on! Koop il on!" said Mr. Bullon lurriodIy. Ho lurnod lo llo
nurso. "Wlal'II I do`"
"Go dovn lovn and buy your son somo cIollos."
Mr. Bullon's son's voico foIIovod lim dovn inlo llo laII: "And a cano,
fallor. I vanl lo lavo a cano."
Mr. Bullon bangod llo oulor door savagoIy. .
7
2.
"Good-morning," Mr. Bullon said, norvousIy, lo llo cIork in llo Clos-
apoako Dry Goods Company. "I vanl lo buy somo cIollos for my cliId."
"Hov oId is your cliId, sir`"
"Aboul six lours," ansvorod Mr. Bullon, villoul duo considoralion.
"Babios' suppIy doparlmonl in llo roar."
"Wly, I don'l llinkI'm nol suro llal's vlal I vanl. Il'slo's an
unusuaIIy Iargo-sizo cliId. ExcoplionaIIyalIargo."
"Tloy lavo llo Iargosl cliId's sizos."
"Wloro is llo boys' doparlmonl`" inquirod Mr. Bullon, slifling lis
ground dosporaloIy. Ho foIl llal llo cIork musl suroIy sconl lis slamofuI
socrol.
"Rigll loro."
"WoII" Ho losilalod. Tlo nolion of drossing lis son in mon's cIollos
vas ropugnanl lo lim. If, say, lo couId onIy find a tcr Iargo boy's suil,
lo migll cul off llal Iong and avfuI board, dyo llo vlilo lair brovn,
and llus manago lo concoaI llo vorsl, and lo rolain somolling of lis
ovn soIf-rospoclnol lo monlion lis posilion in BaIlimoro socioly.
Bul a franlic inspoclion of llo boys' doparlmonl rovoaIod no suils lo fil
llo nov-born Bullon. Ho bIamod llo sloro, of coursoin sucl casos il is
llo lling lo bIamo llo sloro.
"Hov oId did you say llal boy of yours vas`" domandod llo cIork
curiousIy.
"Ho'ssixloon."
"Ol, I bog your pardon. I llougll you said six |curs. You'II find llo
youlls' doparlmonl in llo noxl aisIo."
Mr. Bullon lurnod misorabIy avay. Tlon lo sloppod, brigllonod, and
poinlod lis fingor lovard a drossod dummy in llo vindov dispIay.
"Tloro!" lo oxcIaimod. "I'II lako llal suil, oul lloro on llo dummy."
Tlo cIork slarod. "Wly," lo proloslod, "llal's nol a cliId's suil. Al Ioasl
il is, bul il's for fancy dross. You couId voar il yoursoIf!"
"Wrap il up," insislod lis cuslomor norvousIy. "Tlal's vlal I vanl."
Tlo aslonislod cIork oboyod.
Back al llo lospilaI Mr. Bullon onlorod llo nursory and aImosl llrov
llo packago al lis son. "Horo's your cIollos," lo snappod oul.
Tlo oId man unliod llo packago and viovod llo conlonls vill a quiz-
zicaI oyo.
"Tloy Iook sorl of funny lo mo," lo compIainod, "I don'l vanl lo bo
mado a monkoy of"
8
"You'vo mado a monkoy of mo!" rolorlod Mr. Bullon fiorcoIy. "Novor
you mind lov funny you Iook. Iul llom onor I'IIor I'II spcn| you."
Ho svaIIovod unoasiIy al llo ponuIlimalo vord, fooIing novorlloIoss
llal il vas llo propor lling lo say.
"AII rigll, fallor"llis vill a grolosquo simuIalion of fiIiaI ro-
spocl"you'vo Iivod Iongor, you knov bosl. }usl as you say."
As boforo, llo sound of llo vord "fallor" causod Mr. Bullon lo slarl vi-
oIonlIy. "And lurry."
"I'm lurrying, fallor."
Wlon lis son vas drossod Mr. Bullon rogardod lim vill doprossion.
Tlo coslumo consislod of dollod socks, pink panls, and a boIlod bIouso
vill a vido vlilo coIIar. Ovor llo Iallor vavod llo Iong vlilisl board,
drooping aImosl lo llo vaisl. Tlo offocl vas nol good.
"Wail!"
Mr. Bullon soizod a lospilaI sloars and vill llroo quick snaps ampu-
lalod a Iargo soclion of llo board. Bul ovon vill llis improvomonl llo
onsombIo foII far slorl of porfoclion. Tlo romaining brusl of scraggIy
lair, llo valory oyos, llo ancionl looll, soomod oddIy oul of lono vill
llo gayoly of llo coslumo. Mr. Bullon, lovovor, vas obduralolo loId
oul lis land. "Como aIong!" lo said slornIy.
His son look llo land lruslingIy. "Wlal aro you going lo caII mo,
dad`" lo quavorod as lloy vaIkod from llo nursory"jusl 'baby' for a
vliIo` liII you llink of a bollor namo`"
Mr. Bullon grunlod. "I don'l knov," lo ansvorod larslIy. "I llink vo'II
caII you MollusoIal."
9
3.
Evon aflor llo nov addilion lo llo Bullon famiIy lad lad lis lair cul
slorl and llon dyod lo a sparso unnaluraI bIack, lad lad lis faco slavod
so cIoso llal il gIislonod, and lad boon allirod in smaII-boy cIollos mado
lo ordor by a fIabborgaslod laiIor, il vas impossibIo for Bullon lo ignoro
llo facl llal lis son vas a poor oxcuso for a firsl famiIy baby. Dospilo lis
agod sloop, Bonjamin Bullonfor il vas by llis namo lloy caIIod lim in-
sload of by llo approprialo bul invidious MollusoIalvas fivo fool
oigll inclos laII. His cIollos did nol concoaI llis, nor did llo cIipping
and dyoing of lis oyobrovs disguiso llo facl llal llo oyos undorvoro
fadod and valory and lirod. In facl, llo baby-nurso vlo lad boon on-
gagod in advanco Iofl llo louso aflor ono Iook, in a slalo of considorabIo
indignalion.
Bul Mr. Bullon porsislod in lis unvavoring purposo. Bonjamin vas a
baby, and a baby lo slouId romain. Al firsl lo docIarod llal if Bonjamin
didn'l Iiko varm miIk lo couId go villoul food aIlogollor, bul lo vas fi-
naIIy provaiIod upon lo aIIov lis son broad and bullor, and ovon oal-
moaI by vay of a compromiso. Ono day lo brougll lomo a rallIo and,
giving il lo Bonjamin, insislod in no uncorlain lorms llal lo slouId "pIay
vill il," vloroupon llo oId man look il vill a voary oxprossion and
couId bo loard jingIing il obodionlIy al inlorvaIs llrougloul llo day.
Tloro can bo no doubl, llougl, llal llo rallIo borod lim, and llal lo
found ollor and moro soolling amusomonls vlon lo vas Iofl aIono. Ior
inslanco, Mr. Bullon discovorod ono day llal during llo procoding vook
lo lad smokod moro cigars llan ovor boforoa plonomonon, vlicl
vas oxpIainod a fov days Ialor vlon, onloring llo nursory unoxpoclodIy,
lo found llo room fuII of fainl bIuo lazo and Bonjamin, vill a guiIly ox-
prossion on lis faco, lrying lo concoaI llo bull of a dark Havana. Tlis, of
courso, caIIod for a sovoro spanking, bul Mr. Bullon found llal lo couId
nol bring limsoIf lo adminislor il. Ho moroIy varnod lis son llal lo
vouId "slunl lis grovll."
NovorlloIoss lo porsislod in lis alliludo. Ho brougll lomo Ioad soI-
diors, lo brougll loy lrains, lo brougll Iargo pIoasanl animaIs mado of
collon, and, lo porfocl llo iIIusion vlicl lo vas croalingfor limsoIf al
Ioasllo passionaloIy domandod of llo cIork in llo loy-sloro vlollor
"llo painl vouId como ofl llo pink duck if llo baby pul il in lis moull."
Bul, dospilo aII lis fallor's offorls, Bonjamin rofusod lo bo inloroslod. Ho
vouId sloaI dovn llo back slairs and rolurn lo llo nursory vill a
voIumo of llo EncycIopdia Brilannica, ovor vlicl lo vouId poro
10
llrougl an aflornoon, vliIo lis collon covs and lis Noal's ark voro Iofl
nogIoclod on llo fIoor. Againsl sucl a slubbornnoss Mr. Bullon's offorls
voro of IillIo avaiI.
Tlo sonsalion croalod in BaIlimoro vas, al firsl, prodigious. Wlal llo
mislap vouId lavo cosl llo Bullons and lloir kinsfoIk sociaIIy cannol bo
dolorminod, for llo oulbroak of llo CiviI War drov llo cily's allonlion lo
ollor llings. A fov poopIo vlo voro unfaiIingIy poIilo rackod lloir
brains for compIimonls lo givo lo llo paronlsand finaIIy lil upon llo
ingonious dovico of docIaring llal llo baby rosombIod lis grandfallor, a
facl vlicl, duo lo llo slandard slalo of docay common lo aII mon of sov-
only, couId nol bo doniod. Mr. and Mrs. Rogor Bullon voro nol pIoasod,
and Bonjamin's grandfallor vas furiousIy insuIlod.
Bonjamin, onco lo Iofl llo lospilaI, look Iifo as lo found il. SovoraI
smaII boys voro brougll lo soo lim, and lo sponl a sliff-joinlod aflor-
noon lrying lo vork up an inlorosl in lops and marbIoslo ovon man-
agod, quilo accidonlaIIy, lo broak a kilclon vindov vill a slono from a
sIing slol, a foal vlicl socrolIy doIigllod lis fallor.
Tloroaflor Bonjamin conlrivod lo broak somolling ovory day, bul lo
did lloso llings onIy bocauso lloy voro oxpoclod of lim, and bocauso lo
vas by naluro obIiging.
Wlon lis grandfallor's iniliaI anlagonism voro off, Bonjamin and llal
gonlIoman look onormous pIoasuro in ono anollor's company. Tloy
vouId sil for lours, lloso lvo, so far aparl in ago and oxporionco, and,
Iiko oId cronios, discuss vill liroIoss monolony llo sIov ovonls of llo
day. Bonjamin foIl moro al oaso in lis grandfallor's prosonco llan in lis
paronls'lloy soomod aIvays somovlal in avo of lim and, dospilo llo
diclaloriaI aullorily lloy oxorcisod ovor lim, froquonlIy addrossod lim
as "Mr."
Ho vas as puzzIod as any ono oIso al llo apparonlIy advancod ago of
lis mind and body al birll. Ho road up on il in llo modicaI journaI, bul
found llal no sucl caso lad boon proviousIy rocordod. Al lis fallor's ur-
ging lo mado an lonosl allompl lo pIay vill ollor boys, and froquonlIy
lo joinod in llo miIdor gamosfoolbaII slook lim up loo mucl, and lo
foarod llal in caso of a fracluro lis ancionl bonos vouId rofuso lo knil.
Wlon lo vas fivo lo vas sonl lo kindorgarlon, vloro lo inilialod inlo
llo arl of pasling groon papor on orango papor, of voaving coIorod maps
and manufacluring olornaI cardboard nockIacos. Ho vas incIinod lo
drovso off lo sIoop in llo middIo of lloso lasks, a labil vlicl boll irril-
alod and frigllonod lis young loaclor. To lis roIiof slo compIainod lo
11
lis paronls, and lo vas romovod from llo sclooI. Tlo Rogor Bullons
loId lloir frionds llal lloy foIl lo vas loo young.
By llo limo lo vas lvoIvo yoars oId lis paronls lad grovn usod lo
lim. Indood, so slrong is llo forco of cuslom llal lloy no Iongor foIl llal
lo vas difforonl from any ollor cliIdoxcopl vlon somo curious anom-
aIy romindod llom of llo facl. Bul ono day a fov vooks aflor lis lvoIfll
birllday, vliIo Iooking in llo mirror, Bonjamin mado, or llougll lo
mado, an aslonisling discovory. Did lis oyos docoivo lim, or lad lis
lair lurnod in llo dozon yoars of lis Iifo from vlilo lo iron-gray undor
ils concoaIing dyo` Was llo nolvork of vrinkIos on lis faco bocoming
Ioss pronouncod` Was lis skin loaIllior and firmor, vill ovon a loucl of
ruddy vinlor coIor` Ho couId nol loII. Ho knov llal lo no Iongor
sloopod, and llal lis plysicaI condilion lad improvod sinco llo oarIy
days of lis Iifo.
"Can il bo`" lo llougll lo limsoIf, or, rallor, scarcoIy darod lo
llink.
Ho vonl lo lis fallor. "I am grovn," lo announcod dolorminodIy. "I
vanl lo pul on Iong lrousors."
His fallor losilalod. "WoII," lo said finaIIy, "I don'l knov. Iourloon is
llo ago for pulling on Iong lrousorsand you aro onIy lvoIvo."
"Bul you'II lavo lo admil," proloslod Bonjamin, "llal I'm big for my
ago."
His fallor Iookod al lim vill iIIusory spocuIalion. "Ol, I'm nol so suro
of llal," lo said. "I vas as big as you vlon I vas lvoIvo."
Tlis vas nol lruoil vas aII parl of Rogor Bullon's siIonl agroomonl
vill limsoIf lo boIiovo in lis son's normaIily.
IinaIIy a compromiso vas roaclod. Bonjamin vas lo conlinuo lo dyo
lis lair. Ho vas lo mako a bollor allompl lo pIay vill boys of lis ovn
ago. Ho vas nol lo voar lis spoclacIos or carry a cano in llo slrool. In ro-
lurn for lloso concossions lo vas aIIovod lis firsl suil of Iong lrousors.
.
12
4.
Of llo Iifo of Bonjamin Bullon bolvoon lis lvoIfll and lvonly-firsl yoar I
inlond lo say IillIo. Suffico lo rocord llal lloy voro yoars of normaI un-
grovll. Wlon Bonjamin vas oiglloon lo vas orocl as a man of fifly, lo
lad moro lair and il vas of a dark gray, lis slop vas firm, lis voico lad
Iosl ils crackod quavor and doscondod lo a loaIlly barilono. So lis fallor
sonl lim up lo Connoclicul lo lako oxaminalions for onlranco lo YaIo CoI-
Iogo. Bonjamin passod lis oxaminalion and bocamo a mombor of llo
froslman cIass.
On llo llird day foIIoving lis malricuIalion lo rocoivod a nolificalion
from Mr. Harl, llo coIIogo rogislrar, lo caII al lis offico and arrango lis
scloduIo. Bonjamin, gIancing in llo mirror, docidod llal lis lair noodod
a nov appIicalion of ils brovn dyo, bul an anxious inspoclion of lis bur-
oau dravor discIosod llal llo dyo bollIo vas nol lloro. Tlon lo ro-
momborodlo lad ompliod il llo day boforo and llrovn il avay.
Ho vas in a diIomma. Ho vas duo al llo rogislrar's in fivo minulos.
Tloro soomod lo bo no loIp for illo musl go as lo vas. Ho did.
"Good-morning," said llo rogislrar poIiloIy. "You'vo como lo inquiro
aboul your son."
"Wly, as a mallor of facl, my namo's Bullon" bogan Bonjamin, bul
Mr. Harl cul lim off.
"I'm vory gIad lo mool you, Mr. Bullon. I'm oxpocling your son loro
any minulo."
"Tlal's mo!" bursl oul Bonjamin. "I'm a froslman."
"Wlal!"
"I'm a froslman."
"SuroIy you'ro joking."
"Nol al aII."
Tlo rogislrar frovnod and gIancod al a card boforo lim. "Wly, I lavo
Mr. Bonjamin Bullon's ago dovn loro as oiglloon."
"Tlal's my ago," assorlod Bonjamin, fIusling sIigllIy.
Tlo rogislrar oyod lim voariIy. "Nov suroIy, Mr. Bullon, you don'l ox-
pocl mo lo boIiovo llal."
Bonjamin smiIod voariIy. "I am oiglloon," lo ropoalod.
Tlo rogislrar poinlod slornIy lo llo door. "Gol oul," lo said. "Gol oul of
coIIogo and gol oul of lovn. You aro a dangorous Iunalic."
"I am oiglloon."
13
Mr. Harl oponod llo door. "Tlo idoa!" lo sloulod. "A man of your ago
lrying lo onlor loro as a froslman. Eiglloon yoars oId, aro you` WoII, I'II
givo you oiglloon minulos lo gol oul of lovn."
Bonjamin Bullon vaIkod vill dignily from llo room, and laIf a dozon
undorgradualos, vlo voro vailing in llo laII, foIIovod lim curiousIy
vill lloir oyos. Wlon lo lad gono a IillIo vay lo lurnod around, facod
llo infurialod rogislrar, vlo vas sliII slanding in llo door-vay, and ro-
poalod in a firm voico: "I am oiglloon yoars oId."
To a clorus of lillors vlicl vonl up from llo group of undorgradu-
alos, Bonjamin vaIkod avay.
Bul lo vas nol falod lo oscapo so oasiIy. On lis moIancloIy vaIk lo llo
raiIroad slalion lo found llal lo vas boing foIIovod by a group, llon by
a svarm, and finaIIy by a donso mass of undorgradualos. Tlo vord lad
gono around llal a Iunalic lad passod llo onlranco oxaminalions for
YaIo and allomplod lo paIm limsoIf off as a youll of oiglloon. A fovor of
oxcilomonl pormoalod llo coIIogo. Mon ran lalIoss oul of cIassos, llo
foolbaII loam abandonod ils praclico and joinod llo mob, profossors'
vivos vill bonnols avry and buslIos oul of posilion, ran slouling aflor
llo procossion, from vlicl procoodod a conlinuaI succossion of romarks
aimod al llo londor sonsibiIilios of Bonjamin Bullon.
"Ho musl bo llo vandoring }ov!"
"Ho ougll lo go lo prop sclooI al lis ago!"
"Iook al llo infanl prodigy!"
"Ho llougll llis vas llo oId mon's lomo."
"Go up lo Harvard!"
Bonjamin incroasod lis gail, and soon lo vas running. Ho vouId slov
llom! Ho ucu|! go lo Harvard, and llon lloy vouId rogrol lloso iII-con-
sidorod launls!
SafoIy on board llo lrain for BaIlimoro, lo pul lis load from llo vin-
dov. "You'II rogrol llis!" lo sloulod.
"Ha-la!" llo undorgradualos Iauglod. "Ha-la-la!" Il vas llo biggosl
mislako llal YaIo CoIIogo lad ovor mado. .
14
5.
In 188O Bonjamin Bullon vas lvonly yoars oId, and lo signaIisod lis
birllday by going lo vork for lis fallor in Rogor Bullon & Co., WloIo-
saIo Hardvaro. Il vas in llal samo yoar llal lo bogan "going oul so-
ciaIIy"llal is, lis fallor insislod on laking lim lo sovoraI faslionabIo
dancos. Rogor Bullon vas nov fifly, and lo and lis son voro moro and
moro companionabIoin facl, sinco Bonjamin lad coasod lo dyo lis lair
(vlicl vas sliII grayisl) lloy appoarod aboul llo samo ago, and couId
lavo passod for brollors.
Ono nigll in Augusl lloy gol inlo llo plaolon allirod in lloir fuII-
dross suils and drovo oul lo a danco al llo SlovIins' counlry louso, silu-
alod jusl oulsido of BaIlimoro. Il vas a gorgoous ovoning. A fuII moon
dronclod llo road lo llo IuslroIoss coIour of pIalinum, and Ialo-bIoom-
ing larvosl fIovors broallod inlo llo molionIoss air aromas llal voro
Iiko Iov, laIf-loard Iaugllor. Tlo opon counlry, carpolod for rods
around vill brigll vloal, vas lransIuconl as in llo day. Il vas aImosl
impossibIo nol lo bo affoclod by llo sloor boauly of llo skyaImosl.
"Tloro's a groal fuluro in llo dry-goods businoss," Rogor Bullon vas
saying. Ho vas nol a spiriluaI manlis aosllolic sonso vas
rudimonlary.
"OId foIIovs Iiko mo can'l Ioarn nov lricks," lo obsorvod profoundIy.
"Il's you youngslors vill onorgy and vilaIily llal lavo llo groal fuluro
boforo you."
Iar up llo road llo Iiglls of llo SlovIins' counlry louso driflod inlo
viov, and prosonlIy lloro vas a sigling sound llal cropl porsislonlIy lo-
vard llomil migll lavo boon llo fino pIainl of vioIins or llo ruslIo of
llo siIvor vloal undor llo moon.
Tloy puIIod up bolind a landsomo brouglam vloso passongors voro
disombarking al llo door. A Iady gol oul, llon an oIdorIy gonlIoman,
llon anollor young Iady, boaulifuI as sin. Bonjamin slarlod, an aImosl
clomicaI clango soomod lo dissoIvo and rocomposo llo vory oIomonls of
lis body. A rigour passod ovor lim, bIood roso inlo lis clooks, lis foro-
load, and lloro vas a sloady llumping in lis oars. Il vas firsl Iovo.
Tlo girI vas sIondor and fraiI, vill lair llal vas aslon undor llo
moon and lonoy-coIourod undor llo spulloring gas-Iamps of llo porcl.
Ovor lor slouIdors vas llrovn a Spanisl manliIIa of soflosl yoIIov, bul-
lorfIiod in bIack, lor fool voro gIilloring bullons al llo lom of lor
buslIod dross.
15
Rogor Bullon Ioanod ovor lo lis son. "Tlal," lo said, "is young HiIdo-
gardo Moncriof, llo daugllor of GonoraI Moncriof."
Bonjamin noddod coIdIy. "Irolly IillIo lling," lo said indifforonlIy. Bul
vlon llo nogro boy lad Iod llo buggy avay, lo addod: "Dad, you migll
inlroduco mo lo lor."
Tloy approaclod a group, of vlicl Miss Moncriof vas llo conlro.
Roarod in llo oId lradilion, slo curlsiod Iov boforo Bonjamin. Yos, lo
migll lavo a danco. Ho llankod lor and vaIkod avayslaggorod avay.
Tlo inlorvaI unliI llo limo for lis lurn slouId arrivo draggod ilsoIf oul
inlorminabIy. Ho slood cIoso lo llo vaII, siIonl, inscrulabIo, valcling
vill murdorous oyos llo young bIoods of BaIlimoro as lloy oddiod
around HiIdogardo Moncriof, passionalo admiralion in lloir facos. Hov
obnoxious lloy soomod lo Bonjamin, lov inloIorabIy rosy! Tloir curIing
brovn vliskors arousod in lim a fooIing oquivaIonl lo indigoslion.
Bul vlon lis ovn limo camo, and lo driflod vill lor oul upon llo
clanging fIoor lo llo music of llo Ialosl vaIlz from Iaris, lis joaIousios
and anxiolios moIlod from lim Iiko a manlIo of snov. BIind vill on-
clanlmonl, lo foIl llal Iifo vas jusl boginning.
"You and your brollor gol loro jusl as vo did, didn'l you`" askod
HiIdogardo, Iooking up al lim vill oyos llal voro Iiko brigll bIuo
onamoI.
Bonjamin losilalod. If slo look lim for lis fallor's brollor, vouId il bo
bosl lo onIigllon lor` Ho romomborod lis oxporionco al YaIo, so lo do-
cidod againsl il. Il vouId bo rudo lo conlradicl a Iady, il vouId bo crim-
inaI lo mar llis oxquisilo occasion vill llo grolosquo slory of lis origin.
Ialor, porlaps. So lo noddod, smiIod, Iislonod, vas lappy.
"I Iiko mon of your ago," HiIdogardo loId lim. "Young boys aro so idi-
olic. Tloy loII mo lov mucl clampagno lloy drink al coIIogo, and lov
mucl monoy lloy Ioso pIaying cards. Mon of your ago knov lov lo ap-
procialo vomon."
Bonjamin foIl limsoIf on llo vorgo of a proposaIvill an offorl lo
clokod back llo impuIso. "You'ro jusl llo romanlic ago," slo conlin-
uod"fifly. Tvonly-fivo is loo vordIy-viso, llirly is apl lo bo paIo from
ovorvork, forly is llo ago of Iong slorios llal lako a vloIo cigar lo loII,
sixly isol, sixly is loo noar sovonly, bul fifly is llo moIIov ago. I Iovo
fifly."
Iifly soomod lo Bonjamin a gIorious ago. Ho Iongod passionaloIy lo bo
fifly.
15
"I'vo aIvays said," vonl on HiIdogardo, "llal I'd rallor marry a man of
fifly and bo lakon caro of llan many a man of llirly and lako caro of
|in."
Ior Bonjamin llo rosl of llo ovoning vas ballod in a lonoy-coIourod
misl. HiIdogardo gavo lim lvo moro dancos, and lloy discovorod llal
lloy voro marvoIIousIy in accord on aII llo quoslions of llo day. Slo vas
lo go driving vill lim on llo foIIoving Sunday, and llon lloy vouId
discuss aII lloso quoslions furllor.
Going lomo in llo plaolon jusl boforo llo crack of davn, vlon llo
firsl boos voro lumming and llo fading moon gIimmorod in llo cooI
dov, Bonjamin knov vaguoIy llal lis fallor vas discussing vloIosaIo
lardvaro.
". . And vlal do you llink slouId moril our biggosl allonlion aflor
lammors and naiIs`" llo oIdor Bullon vas saying.
"Iovo," ropIiod Bonjamin absonl-mindodIy.
"Iugs`" oxcIaimod Rogor Bullon, "Wly, I'vo jusl covorod llo quoslion
of Iugs."
Bonjamin rogardod lim vill dazod oyos jusl as llo oaslorn sky vas
suddonIy crackod vill Iigll, and an orioIo yavnod piorcingIy in llo
quickoning lroos.
17
6.
Wlon, six monlls Ialor, llo ongagomonl of Miss HiIdogardo Moncriof lo
Mr. Bonjamin Bullon vas mado knovn (I say "mado knovn," for GonoraI
Moncriof docIarod lo vouId rallor faII upon lis svord llan announco
il), llo oxcilomonl in BaIlimoro socioly roaclod a fovorisl pilcl. Tlo aI-
mosl forgollon slory of Bonjamin's birll vas romomborod and sonl oul
upon llo vinds of scandaI in picarosquo and incrodibIo forms. Il vas
said llal Bonjamin vas roaIIy llo fallor of Rogor Bullon, llal lo vas lis
brollor vlo lad boon in prison for forly yoars, llal lo vas }oln WiIkos
Booll in disguisoand, finaIIy, llal lo lad lvo smaII conicaI lorns
sprouling from lis load.
Tlo Sunday suppIomonls of llo Nov York papors pIayod up llo caso
vill fascinaling skolclos vlicl slovod llo load of Bonjamin Bullon al-
laclod lo a fisl, lo a snako, and, finaIIy, lo a body of soIid brass. Ho bo-
camo knovn, journaIislicaIIy, as llo Myslory Man of MaryIand. Bul llo
lruo slory, as is usuaIIy llo caso, lad a vory smaII circuIalion.
Hovovor, ovory ono agrood vill GonoraI Moncriof llal il vas
"criminaI" for a IovoIy girI vlo couId lavo marriod any boau in BaI-
limoro lo llrov lorsoIf inlo llo arms of a man vlo vas assurodIy fifly.
In vain Mr. Rogor Bullon pubIislod lis son's birll corlificalo in Iargo
lypo in llo BaIlimoro 8|czc. No ono boIiovod il. You lad onIy lo Iook al
Bonjamin and soo.
On llo parl of llo lvo poopIo mosl concornod lloro vas no vavoring.
So many of llo slorios aboul lor fianc voro faIso llal HiIdogardo ro-
fusod slubbornIy lo boIiovo ovon llo lruo ono. In vain GonoraI Moncriof
poinlod oul lo lor llo ligl morlaIily among mon of fiflyor, al Ioasl,
among mon vlo Iookod fifly, in vain lo loId lor of llo inslabiIily of llo
vloIosaIo lardvaro businoss. HiIdogardo lad closon lo marry for moI-
Iovnoss, and marry slo did. .
18
7.
In ono parlicuIar, al Ioasl, llo frionds of HiIdogardo Moncriof voro mis-
lakon. Tlo vloIosaIo lardvaro businoss prosporod amazingIy. In llo fif-
loon yoars bolvoon Bonjamin Bullon's marriago in 188O and lis fallor's
roliromonl in 1895, llo famiIy forluno vas doubIodand llis vas duo
IargoIy lo llo youngor mombor of llo firm.
NoodIoss lo say, BaIlimoro ovonluaIIy rocoivod llo coupIo lo ils bosom.
Evon oId GonoraI Moncriof bocamo roconciIod lo lis son-in-Iav vlon
Bonjamin gavo lim llo monoy lo bring oul lis "Hislory of llo CiviI War"
in lvonly voIumos, vlicl lad boon rofusod by nino prominonl
pubIislors.
In Bonjamin limsoIf fifloon yoars lad vrougll many clangos. Il
soomod lo lim llal llo bIood fIovod vill nov vigor llrougl lis voins.
Il bogan lo bo a pIoasuro lo riso in llo morning, lo vaIk vill an aclivo
slop aIong llo busy, sunny slrool, lo vork unliringIy vill lis slipmonls
of lammors and lis cargoos of naiIs. Il vas in 189O llal lo oxoculod lis
famous businoss coup: lo brougll up llo suggoslion llal c|| nci|s usc! in
nci|ing up i|c ccxcs in u|ic| nci|s crc s|ippc! crc i|c prcpcri cj i|c s|ippcc, a
proposaI vlicl bocamo a slalulo, vas approvod by Cliof }uslico IossiIo,
and savod Rogor Bullon and Company, WloIosaIo Hardvaro, moro
llan six |un!rc! nci|s ctcr ccr.
In addilion, Bonjamin discovorod llal lo vas bocoming moro and
moro allraclod by llo gay sido of Iifo. Il vas lypicaI of lis groving on-
llusiasm for pIoasuro llal lo vas llo firsl man in llo cily of BaIlimoro lo
ovn and run an aulomobiIo. Mooling lim on llo slrool, lis conlomporar-
ios vouId slaro onviousIy al llo picluro lo mado of loaIll and vilaIily.
"Ho sooms lo grov youngor ovory yoar," lloy vouId romark. And if
oId Rogor Bullon, nov sixly-fivo yoars oId, lad faiIod al firsl lo givo a
propor voIcomo lo lis son lo alonod al Iasl by bosloving on lim vlal
amounlod lo aduIalion.
And loro vo como lo an unpIoasanl subjocl vlicl il viII bo voII lo
pass ovor as quickIy as possibIo. Tloro vas onIy ono lling llal vorriod
Bonjamin Bullon, lis vifo lad coasod lo allracl lim.
Al llal limo HiIdogardo vas a voman of llirly-fivo, vill a son, Ros-
coo, fourloon yoars oId. In llo oarIy days of lloir marriago Bonjamin lad
vorslippod lor. Bul, as llo yoars passod, lor lonoy-coIorod lair bocamo
an unoxciling brovn, llo bIuo onamoI of lor oyos assumod llo aspocl of
cloap crockorymoroovor, and, mosl of aII, slo lad bocomo loo sollIod
in lor vays, loo pIacid, loo conlonl, loo anomic in lor oxcilomonls, and
19
loo sobor in lor laslo. As a brido il lad boon slo vlo lad "draggod" Bon-
jamin lo dancos and dinnorsnov condilions voro rovorsod. Slo vonl
oul sociaIIy vill lim, bul villoul onllusiasm, dovourod aIroady by llal
olornaI inorlia vlicl comos lo Iivo vill oacl of us ono day and slays
vill us lo llo ond.
Bonjamin's disconlonl vaxod slrongor. Al llo oulbroak of llo Spanisl-
Amorican War in 1898 lis lomo lad for lim so IillIo clarm llal lo do-
cidod lo join llo army. Will lis businoss infIuonco lo oblainod a com-
mission as caplain, and provod so adaplabIo lo llo vork llal lo vas
mado a major, and finaIIy a Iioulonanl-coIonoI jusl in limo lo parlicipalo
in llo coIobralod clargo up San }uan HiII. Ho vas sIigllIy voundod, and
rocoivod a modaI.
Bonjamin lad bocomo so allaclod lo llo aclivily and oxcilomonl of
army Iifo llal lo rogrollod lo givo il up, bul lis businoss roquirod allon-
lion, so lo rosignod lis commission and camo lomo. Ho vas mol al llo
slalion by a brass band and oscorlod lo lis louso.
20
8.
HiIdogardo, vaving a Iargo siIk fIag, groolod lim on llo porcl, and ovon
as lo kissod lor lo foIl vill a sinking of llo loarl llal lloso llroo yoars
lad lakon lloir loII. Slo vas a voman of forly nov, vill a fainl skirmisl
Iino of gray lairs in lor load. Tlo sigll doprossod lim.
Up in lis room lo sav lis rofIoclion in llo famiIiar mirrorlo vonl
cIosor and oxaminod lis ovn faco vill anxioly, comparing il aflor a mo-
monl vill a plolograpl of limsoIf in uniform lakon jusl boforo llo var.
"Good Iord!" lo said aIoud. Tlo procoss vas conlinuing. Tloro vas no
doubl of illo Iookod nov Iiko a man of llirly. Insload of boing do-
Iigllod, lo vas unoasylo vas groving youngor. Ho lad lillorlo
lopod llal onco lo roaclod a bodiIy ago oquivaIonl lo lis ago in yoars,
llo grolosquo plonomonon vlicl lad markod lis birll vouId coaso lo
funclion. Ho sluddorod. His dosliny soomod lo lim avfuI, incrodibIo.
Wlon lo camo dovnslairs HiIdogardo vas vailing for lim. Slo ap-
poarod annoyod, and lo vondorod if slo lad al Iasl discovorod llal
lloro vas somolling amiss. Il vas vill an offorl lo roIiovo llo lonsion
bolvoon llom llal lo broaclod llo mallor al dinnor in vlal lo con-
sidorod a doIicalo vay.
"WoII," lo romarkod IigllIy, "ovorybody says I Iook youngor llan
ovor."
HiIdogardo rogardod lim vill scorn. Slo sniffod. "Do you llink il's
anylling lo boasl aboul`"
"I'm nol boasling," lo assorlod uncomforlabIy.
Slo sniffod again. "Tlo idoa," slo said, and aflor a momonl: "I slouId
llink you'd lavo onougl prido lo slop il."
"Hov can I`" lo domandod.
"I'm nol going lo arguo vill you," slo rolorlod. "Bul lloro's a rigll
vay of doing llings and a vrong vay. If you'vo mado up your mind lo
bo difforonl from ovorybody oIso, I don'l supposo I can slop you, bul I
roaIIy don'l llink il's vory considoralo."
"Bul, HiIdogardo, I can'l loIp il."
"You can loo. You'ro simpIy slubborn. You llink you don'l vanl lo bo
Iiko any ono oIso. You aIvays lavo boon llal vay, and you aIvays viII
bo. Bul jusl llink lov il vouId bo if ovory ono oIso Iookod al llings as
you dovlal vouId llo vorId bo Iiko`"
As llis vas an inano and unansvorabIo argumonl Bonjamin mado no
ropIy, and from llal limo on a clasm bogan lo vidon bolvoon llom. Ho
vondorod vlal possibIo fascinalion slo lad ovor oxorcisod ovor lim.
21
To add lo llo broacl, lo found, as llo nov conlury gallorod loadvay,
llal lis llirsl for gayoly grov slrongor. Novor a parly of any kind in llo
cily of BaIlimoro bul lo vas lloro, dancing vill llo prolliosl of llo
young marriod vomon, clalling vill llo mosl popuIar of llo do-
bulanlos, and finding lloir company clarming, vliIo lis vifo, a dov-
agor of oviI omon, sal among llo claporons, nov in lauglly disapprov-
aI, and nov foIIoving lim vill soIomn, puzzIod, and roproaclfuI oyos.
"Iook!" poopIo vouId romark. "Wlal a pily! A young foIIov llal ago
liod lo a voman of forly-fivo. Ho musl bo lvonly yoars youngor llan lis
vifo." Tloy lad forgollonas poopIo inovilabIy forgolllal back in
188O lloir mammas and papas lad aIso romarkod aboul llis samo iII-
malclod pair.
Bonjamin's groving unlappinoss al lomo vas componsalod for by lis
many nov inlorosls. Ho look up goIf and mado a groal succoss of il. Ho
vonl in for dancing: in 19O6 lo vas an oxporl al "Tlo Boslon," and in
19O8 lo vas considorod proficionl al llo "Maxixo," vliIo in 19O9 lis
"CaslIo WaIk" vas llo onvy of ovory young man in lovn.
His sociaI aclivilios, of courso, inlorforod lo somo oxlonl vill lis busi-
noss, bul llon lo lad vorkod lard al vloIosaIo lardvaro for lvonly-
fivo yoars and foIl llal lo couId soon land il on lo lis son, Roscoo, vlo
lad roconlIy gradualod from Harvard.
Ho and lis son voro, in facl, oflon mislakon for oacl ollor. Tlis
pIoasod Bonjaminlo soon forgol llo insidious foar vlicl lad como
ovor lim on lis rolurn from llo Spanisl-Amorican War, and grov lo
lako a navo pIoasuro in lis appoaranco. Tloro vas onIy ono fIy in llo do-
Iicious oinlmonllo lalod lo appoar in pubIic vill lis vifo. HiIdogardo
vas aImosl fifly, and llo sigll of lor mado lim fooI absurd. .
22
9.
Ono Soplombor day in 191Oa fov yoars aflor Rogor Bullon & Co.,
WloIosaIo Hardvaro, lad boon landod ovor lo young Roscoo Bullona
man, apparonlIy aboul lvonly yoars oId, onlorod limsoIf as a froslman
al Harvard Univorsily in Cambridgo. Ho did nol mako llo mislako of an-
nouncing llal lo vouId novor soo fifly again, nor did lo monlion llo facl
llal lis son lad boon gradualod from llo samo inslilulion lon yoars
boforo.
Ho vas admillod, and aImosl immodialoIy allainod a prominonl posi-
lion in llo cIass, parlIy bocauso lo soomod a IillIo oIdor llan llo ollor
froslmon, vloso avorago ago vas aboul oiglloon.
Bul lis succoss vas IargoIy duo lo llo facl llal in llo foolbaII gamo
vill YaIo lo pIayod so briIIianlIy, vill so mucl dasl and vill sucl a
coId, romorsoIoss angor llal lo scorod sovon loucldovns and fourloon
fioId goaIs for Harvard, and causod ono onliro oIovon of YaIo mon lo bo
carriod singIy from llo fioId, unconscious. Ho vas llo mosl coIobralod
man in coIIogo.
Slrango lo say, in lis llird or junior yoar lo vas scarcoIy abIo lo
"mako" llo loam. Tlo coaclos said llal lo lad Iosl voigll, and il soomod
lo llo moro obsorvanl among llom llal lo vas nol quilo as laII as boforo.
Ho mado no loucldovnsindood, lo vas rolainod on llo loam cliofIy
in lopo llal lis onormous ropulalion vouId bring lorror and disorgan-
isalion lo llo YaIo loam.
In lis sonior yoar lo did nol mako llo loam al aII. Ho lad grovn so
sIigll and fraiI llal ono day lo vas lakon by somo soplomoros for a
froslman, an incidonl vlicl lumiIialod lim lorribIy. Ho bocamo knovn
as somolling of a prodigya sonior vlo vas suroIy no moro llan six-
loonand lo vas oflon slockod al llo vorIdIinoss of somo of lis cIass-
malos. His sludios soomod lardor lo limlo foIl llal lloy voro loo ad-
vancod. Ho lad loard lis cIassmalos spoak of Sl. Midas', llo famous pro-
paralory sclooI, al vlicl so many of llom lad proparod for coIIogo, and
lo dolorminod aflor lis gradualion lo onlor limsoIf al Sl. Midas', vloro
llo sloIlorod Iifo among boys lis ovn sizo vouId bo moro congoniaI lo
lim.
Upon lis gradualion in 1914 lo vonl lomo lo BaIlimoro vill lis Har-
vard dipIoma in lis pockol. HiIdogardo vas nov rosiding in IlaIy, so
Bonjamin vonl lo Iivo vill lis son, Roscoo. Bul llougl lo vas voI-
comod in a gonoraI vay lloro vas obviousIy no loarlinoss in Roscoo's
fooIing lovard limlloro vas ovon porcoplibIo a londoncy on lis son's
23
parl lo llink llal Bonjamin, as lo mopod aboul llo louso in adoIosconl
mooninoss, vas somovlal in llo vay. Roscoo vas marriod nov and
prominonl in BaIlimoro Iifo, and lo vanlod no scandaI lo croop oul in
connoclion vill lis famiIy.
Bonjamin, no Iongor porsona grala vill llo dbulanlos and youngor
coIIogo sol, found limsoIf Iofl mucl aIono, oxcopl for llo companionslip
of llroo or four fifloon-yoar-oId boys in llo noiglborlood. His idoa of
going lo Sl. Midas sclooI rocurrod lo lim.
"Say," lo said lo Roscoo ono day, "I'vo loId you ovor and ovor llal I
vanl lo go lo prop sclooI."
"WoII, go, llon," ropIiod Roscoo slorlIy. Tlo mallor vas dislaslofuI lo
lim, and lo vislod lo avoid a discussion.
"I can'l go aIono," said Bonjamin loIpIossIy. "You'II lavo lo onlor mo
and lako mo up lloro."
"I lavon'l gol limo," docIarod Roscoo abruplIy. His oyos narrovod and
lo Iookod unoasiIy al lis fallor. "As a mallor of facl," lo addod, "you'd
bollor nol go on vill llis businoss mucl Iongor. You bollor puII up
slorl. You bolloryou bollor"lo pausod and lis faco crimsonod as lo
sougll for vords"you bollor lurn rigll around and slarl back llo ollor
vay. Tlis las gono loo far lo bo a joko. Il isn'l funny any Iongor.
Youyou bolavo yoursoIf!"
Bonjamin Iookod al lim, on llo vorgo of loars.
"And anollor lling," conlinuod Roscoo, "vlon visilors aro in llo
louso I vanl you lo caII mo 'UncIo'nol 'Roscoo,' bul 'UncIo,' do you un-
dorsland` Il Iooks absurd for a boy of fifloon lo caII mo by my firsl namo.
Iorlaps you'd bollor caII mo 'UncIo' c|| llo limo, so you'II gol usod lo il."
Will a larsl Iook al lis fallor, Roscoo lurnod avay. .
24
10.
Al llo lorminalion of llis inlorviov, Bonjamin vandorod dismaIIy up-
slairs and slarod al limsoIf in llo mirror. Ho lad nol slavod for llroo
monlls, bul lo couId find nolling on lis faco bul a fainl vlilo dovn
vill vlicl il soomod unnocossary lo moddIo. Wlon lo lad firsl como
lomo from Harvard, Roscoo lad approaclod lim vill llo proposilion
llal lo slouId voar oyo-gIassos and imilalion vliskors gIuod lo lis
clooks, and il lad soomod for a momonl llal llo farco of lis oarIy yoars
vas lo bo ropoalod. Bul vliskors lad ilclod and mado lim aslamod. Ho
vopl and Roscoo lad roIuclanlIy roIonlod.
Bonjamin oponod a book of boys' slorios, "Tlo Boy Scouls in Bimini
Bay," and bogan lo road. Bul lo found limsoIf llinking porsislonlIy
aboul llo var. Amorica lad joinod llo AIIiod causo during llo procoding
monll, and Bonjamin vanlod lo onIisl, bul, aIas, sixloon vas llo minim-
um ago, and lo did nol Iook llal oId. His lruo ago, vlicl vas fifly-sov-
on, vouId lavo disquaIifiod lim, anyvay.
Tloro vas a knock al lis door, and llo bulIor appoarod vill a Iollor
boaring a Iargo officiaI Iogond in llo cornor and addrossod lo Mr. Bon-
jamin Bullon. Bonjamin loro il opon oagorIy, and road llo oncIosuro vill
doIigll. Il informod lim llal many rosorvo officors vlo lad sorvod in
llo Spanisl-Amorican War voro boing caIIod back inlo sorvico vill a
liglor rank, and il oncIosod lis commission as brigadior-gonoraI in llo
Unilod Slalos army vill ordors lo roporl immodialoIy.
Bonjamin jumpod lo lis fool fairIy quivoring vill onllusiasm. Tlis
vas vlal lo lad vanlod. Ho soizod lis cap, and lon minulos Ialor lo
lad onlorod a Iargo laiIoring oslabIislmonl on ClarIos Slrool, and askod
in lis uncorlain lrobIo lo bo moasurod for a uniform.
"Wanl lo pIay soIdior, sonny`" domandod a cIork casuaIIy.
Bonjamin fIuslod. "Say! Novor mind vlal I vanl!" lo rolorlod angriIy.
"My namo's Bullon and I Iivo on Ml. Vornon IIaco, so you knov I'm
good for il."
"WoII," admillod llo cIork losilanlIy, "if you'ro nol, I guoss your daddy
is, aII rigll."
Bonjamin vas moasurod, and a vook Ialor lis uniform vas compIolod.
Ho lad difficuIly in oblaining llo propor gonoraI's insignia bocauso llo
doaIor kopl insisling lo Bonjamin llal a nico Y. W. C. A. badgo vouId
Iook jusl as voII and bo mucl moro fun lo pIay vill.
Saying nolling lo Roscoo, lo Iofl llo louso ono nigll and procoodod
by lrain lo Camp Mosby, in Soull CaroIina, vloro lo vas lo command
25
an infanlry brigado. On a suIlry ApriI day lo approaclod llo onlranco lo
llo camp, paid off llo laxicab vlicl lad brougll lim from llo slalion,
and lurnod lo llo sonlry on guard.
"Gol somo ono lo landIo my Iuggago!" lo said briskIy.
Tlo sonlry oyod lim roproaclfuIIy. "Say," lo romarkod, "vloro you
goin' vill llo gonoraI's duds, sonny`"
Bonjamin, voloran of llo Spanisl-Amorican War, vlirIod upon lim
vill firo in lis oyo, bul vill, aIas, a clanging lrobIo voico.
"Como lo allonlion!" lo lriod lo llundor, lo pausod for broallllon
suddonIy lo sav llo sonlry snap lis looIs logollor and bring lis rifIo lo
llo prosonl. Bonjamin concoaIod a smiIo of gralificalion, bul vlon lo
gIancod around lis smiIo fadod. Il vas nol lo vlo lad inspirod obodi-
onco, bul an imposing arliIIory coIonoI vlo vas approacling on
lorsoback.
"CoIonoI!" caIIod Bonjamin slriIIy.
Tlo coIonoI camo up, drov roin, and Iookod cooIIy dovn al lim vill a
lvinkIo in lis oyos. "Wloso IillIo boy aro you`" lo domandod kindIy.
"I'II soon darn voII slov you vloso IillIo boy I am!" rolorlod Bonjamin
in a forocious voico. "Gol dovn off llal lorso!"
Tlo coIonoI roarod vill Iaugllor.
"You vanl lim, ol, gonoraI`"
"Horo!" criod Bonjamin dosporaloIy. "Road llis." And lo llrusl lis
commission lovard llo coIonoI.
Tlo coIonoI road il, lis oyos popping from lloir sockols.
"Wloro'd you gol llis`" lo domandod, sIipping llo documonl inlo lis
ovn pockol.
"I gol il from llo Govornmonl, as you'II soon find oul!"
"You como aIong vill mo," said llo coIonoI vill a pocuIiar Iook. "Wo'II
go up lo loadquarlors and laIk llis ovor. Como aIong."
Tlo coIonoI lurnod and bogan vaIking lis lorso in llo diroclion of
loadquarlors. Tloro vas nolling for Bonjamin lo do bul foIIov vill as
mucl dignily as possibIomoanvliIo promising limsoIf a slorn
rovongo.
Bul llis rovongo did nol maloriaIizo. Tvo days Ialor, lovovor, lis son
Roscoo maloriaIizod from BaIlimoro, lol and cross from a lasly lrip, and
oscorlod llo vooping gonoraI, scns uniform, back lo lis lomo.
25
11.
In 192O Roscoo Bullon's firsl cliId vas born. During llo allondanl fosliv-
ilios, lovovor, no ono llougll il "llo lling" lo monlion, llal llo IillIo
grubby boy, apparonlIy aboul lon yoars of ago vlo pIayod around llo
louso vill Ioad soIdiors and a minialuro circus, vas llo nov baby's ovn
grandfallor.
No ono disIikod llo IillIo boy vloso frosl, cloorfuI faco vas crossod
vill jusl a linl of sadnoss, bul lo Roscoo Bullon lis prosonco vas a
sourco of lormonl. In llo idiom of lis gonoralion Roscoo did nol considor
llo mallor "officionl." Il soomod lo lim llal lis fallor, in rofusing lo Iook
sixly, lad nol bolavod Iiko a "rod-bIoodod lo-man"llis vas Roscoo's
favorilo oxprossionbul in a curious and porvorso mannor. Indood, lo
llink aboul llo mallor for as mucl as a laIf an lour drovo lim lo llo
odgo of insanily. Roscoo boIiovod llal "Iivo viros" slouId koop young,
bul carrying il oul on sucl a scaIo vasvasvas inofficionl. And lloro
Roscoo roslod.
Iivo yoars Ialor Roscoo's IillIo boy lad grovn oId onougl lo pIay
cliIdisl gamos vill IillIo Bonjamin undor llo suporvision of llo samo
nurso. Roscoo look llom boll lo kindorgarlon on llo samo day, and Bon-
jamin found llal pIaying vill IillIo slrips of coIorod papor, making mals
and clains and curious and boaulifuI dosigns, vas llo mosl fascinaling
gamo in llo vorId. Onco lo vas bad and lad lo sland in llo
cornorllon lo criodbul for llo mosl parl lloro voro gay lours in llo
cloorfuI room, vill llo sunIigll coming in llo vindovs and Miss
BaiIoy's kind land rosling for a momonl nov and llon in lis lousIod
lair.
Roscoo's son movod up inlo llo firsl grado aflor a yoar, bul Bonjamin
slayod on in llo kindorgarlon. Ho vas vory lappy. Somolimos vlon oll-
or lols laIkod aboul vlal lloy vouId do vlon lloy grov up a sladov
vouId cross lis IillIo faco as if in a dim, cliIdisl vay lo roaIizod llal
lloso voro llings in vlicl lo vas novor lo slaro.
Tlo days fIovod on in monolonous conlonl. Ho vonl back a llird yoar
lo llo kindorgarlon, bul lo vas loo IillIo nov lo undorsland vlal llo
brigll slining slrips of papor voro for. Ho criod bocauso llo ollor boys
voro biggor llan lo, and lo vas afraid of llom. Tlo loaclor laIkod lo
lim, bul llougl lo lriod lo undorsland lo couId nol undorsland al aII.
Ho vas lakon from llo kindorgarlon. His nurso, Nana, in lor slarclod
ginglam dross, bocamo llo conlro of lis liny vorId. On brigll days lloy
vaIkod in llo park, Nana vouId poinl al a groal gray monslor and say
27
"oIoplanl," and Bonjamin vouId say il aflor lor, and vlon lo vas boing
undrossod for bod llal nigll lo vouId say il ovor and ovor aIoud lo lor:
"EIyplanl, oIyplanl, oIyplanl." Somolimos Nana Iol lim jump on llo
bod, vlicl vas fun, bocauso if you sal dovn oxaclIy rigll il vouId
bounco you up on your fool again, and if you said "Al" for a Iong limo
vliIo you jumpod you gol a vory pIoasing brokon vocaI offocl.
Ho Iovod lo lako a big cano from llo lalrack and go around lilling
clairs and labIos vill il and saying: "Iigll, figll, figll." Wlon lloro
voro poopIo lloro llo oId Iadios vouId cIuck al lim, vlicl inloroslod
lim, and llo young Iadios vouId lry lo kiss lim, vlicl lo submillod lo
vill miId borodom. And vlon llo Iong day vas dono al fivo o'cIock lo
vouId go up-slairs vill Nana and bo fod oalmoaI and nico sofl musly
foods vill a spoon.
Tloro voro no lroubIosomo momorios in lis cliIdisl sIoop, no lokon
camo lo lim of lis bravo days al coIIogo, of llo gIilloring yoars vlon lo
fIuslorod llo loarls of many girIs. Tloro voro onIy llo vlilo, safo vaIIs
of lis crib and Nana and a man vlo camo lo soo lim somolimos, and a
groal big orango baII llal Nana poinlod al jusl boforo lis lviIigll bod
lour and caIIod "sun." Wlon llo sun vonl lis oyos voro sIoopylloro
voro no droams, no droams lo launl lim.
Tlo paslllo viId clargo al llo load of lis mon up San }uan HiII, llo
firsl yoars of lis marriago vlon lo vorkod Ialo inlo llo summor dusk
dovn in llo busy cily for young HiIdogardo vlom lo Iovod, llo days
boforo llal vlon lo sal smoking far inlo llo nigll in llo gIoomy oId Bul-
lon louso on Monroo Slrool vill lis grandfalloraII lloso lad fadod
Iiko unsubslanliaI droams from lis mind as llougl lloy lad novor boon.
Ho did nol romombor. Ho did nol romombor cIoarIy vlollor llo miIk
vas varm or cooI al lis Iasl fooding or lov llo days passodlloro vas
onIy lis crib and Nana's famiIiar prosonco. And llon lo romomborod
nolling. Wlon lo vas lungry lo criodllal vas aII. Tlrougl llo noons
and niglls lo broallod and ovor lim lloro voro sofl mumbIings and
murmurings llal lo scarcoIy loard, and fainlIy difforonlialod smoIIs, and
Iigll and darknoss.
Tlon il vas aII dark, and lis vlilo crib and llo dim facos llal movod
abovo lim, and llo varm svool aroma of llo miIk, fadod oul aIlogollor
from lis mind.
28