Screenplay

French Existentialists Bijan Samareh Sketch 201 - Rachael Mason INT. LIVING ROOM JEAN-PAUL SARTRE watches television while SIMONE DE BEAUVOIR reads a book and eats crepes. VOICEOVER In 1929, in Paris, France, a famed existentialist philosopher and playwright, Jean-Paul Sartre, met Simone de Beauvoir, a renowned feminist intellectual and another leading existentialist. They quickly took a liking to one another, and formed a partnership that would last them a lifetime. Although they were together for the larger part of a century, little is known about their relationship...until now. Historians have discovered rare b-roll footage from a cancelled documentary on their lives. From the late 1960s, the tapes show some of the most intimate moments from their home life in the north of France. This particular cut shows the couple relaxing after dinner. Enjoy. They both watch television for a few seconds. Jean-Paul rips a huge fart. DE BEAUVOIR Are you fucking serious? JEAN-PAUL What? DE BEAUVOIR Im eating. JEAN-PAUL I didnt do anything.

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CONTINUED: DE BEAUVOIR It smells awful. Like someone soaked an old gym sock in vinegar. JEAN-PAUL How do you know what that smells like? DE BEAUVOIR Cant... talk... currently... suffocating. JEAN-PAUL You dont know that it was me. DE BEAUVOIR It was you. JEAN-PAUL Was it? Or was this perceived fart merely a blip, or tremor in the thin fabric separating your immediate and constructed mode of existence. DE BEAUVOIR It was either that or someone ate way too many fuckin pommes-frites at Samuel Becketts brunch this morning. JEAN-PAUL Okay, fine! I may have had a bit too many pommes-frittes. DE BEAUVOIR How many? JEAN-PAUL Beaucoup de pommes-frites. DE BEAUVOIR Oh, wow. Thats a lot of pommes-frites. JEAN-PAUL Ugh, I have to take a shit. JEAN-PAUL exits. SIMONE DE BEAUVOIR rips a huge fart. JEAN-PAUL (Shouting.) I heard that.

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DE BEAUVOIR I dont care. I own it. Consider it a cry for meaning in the daunting nothingness of this vast ontological void. JEAN-PAUL Can you bring me some toilet paper? DE BEAUVOIR farts again. DE BEAUVOIR Sorry, what was that? I was too busy ripping a huge wet one. JEAN-PAUL Seriously, I have to wipe. DE BEAUVOIR Im not your servant. JEAN-PAUL I know, I know. DE BEAUVOIR And by making me get you some toilet paper, your rearticulating the patriarchal role of subjugator and herebyBOTH (Jean-Paul helps finish her sentence) Reinstating the existing mode of hegemony. JEAN-PAUL I know! Please, let me wipe. I dont want it to get all crusty. DE BEAUVOIR Ugh, fine! She exits. DE BEAUVOIR (OFFSTAGE.) You left your chicken stuff everywhere! JEAN-PAUL Dont touch it! Its marinating. Me and Camus are going to throw it on (MORE) (CONTINUED)

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JEAN-PAUL (contd) the grill tomorrow--straight soakinnn. DE BEAUVOIR re-enters. DE BEAUVOIR Wow, youre really cool. JEAN-PAUL Wheres the TP? DE BEAUVOIR Oh, we ran out. JEAN-PAUL Fuckkk, can you get me some? The doorbell rings. DE BEAUVOIR One second. Jacques Derrida enters. DERRIDA Simone! DE BEAUVOIR Derrida! DERRIDA We still on for bridge? DE BEAUVOIR Of course. Lets do it. They exit. JEAN-PAUL Hey, is that you Jacques!? You gotta check out this marinade. Give me one second. Let me just get off the toilet. Beat. JEAN-PAUL Guys... Guys! Dammit, not again. Blackout.