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*5)/",' Strengths: The location I chose for my figured world is a huge part of my life, so it was easy to come up with strong examples to include in the assignment. They were my personal daily routines. For example: I arrive at work unlock the gate, disarm the alarm system, turn on the lights, and walk into the empty service drive. Saturday is the day I open the dealership. I address him three times to request my needed parts expressing my impatience. These two textual examples were directly from my Saturday work activities. Weaknesses: I had many challenges with this assignment mostly having to do with my lack of paper writing experience. The theme of my writing is strong, but a lot of editing had to be done to make it presentable. My weaknesses included run-on sentences, redundancies, and improper use of words like there and their. For example from the un-edited first draft: The figured world I have chosen is the service department of a local car dealership, and I choose this not only because I work there, also I have a very strong interest for operations in the automotive industry. My favorite type of customer is one who keeps up on the regular maintenance of there vehicle, when they come back for regular maintenance it gives our team opportunities to up sell other items to them and increase profits. The first excerpt was run-on and had to be split into two separate ideas. The second example includes misuse of the word their, and is run-on. Feedback: Some feedback was helpful, but I did not address all of the comments. Here are some examples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ey Features: The descriptions of the locations are not as interesting as the characters involved, so pay particular attention to the character descriptions because as you read the observations these descriptions are reinforced throughout. Like the following description: Amy: Assistant Service Manager/Service Advisor Amy is the glue that holds the dealership together. She is the hardest worker in the service department, and is often doing jobs that are not her responsibility going above and beyond what is asked of her. Amy is well liked by everyone. Her character description is very strong in the observations as you can see in these examples: Amy is trying to calm down an older woman after she found her car battery dead when she tried to leave. Amy rushes in since she is the only service advisor that will be working today.

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