CERITA LUCU SATU

Mrs. Peterson went to the doctor: Im terribly worried about my boy. He thinks hes a chicken.
The doctor asked, And how long has this been going on?
Almost a year, Mrs. Peterson replied.
Well for goodness sakes! Why didnt you bring him to see me sooner?
Because we needed the eggs!
Mrs Peterson pergi ke dokter: "Saya sangat khawatir tentang anak saya. Dia pikir dia ayam. "
Dokter bertanya, "Dan sudah berapa lama ini terjadi?"
"Hampir satu tahun," jawab Mrs Peterson.
"Nah demi kebaikan! Kenapa kau tidak membawanya menemui saya lebih cepat? "
"Karena kami membutuhkan telur!"


CERITA LUCU DUA

A family took a trip to Disney World. After three exhausting days, they headed home. As they
drove away, the son waved and said, Goodbye, Mickey.
The daughter waved and said, Goodbye, Minnie.
The husband waved, rather weakly, and said, Goodbye, Money.

CERITA LUCU TIGA Sebuah keluarga mengambil perjalanan ke Disney World. Setelah
tiga hari yang melelahkan, mereka pulang ke rumah. Ketika mereka melaju pergi, anak
melambaikan tangan dan berkata, "Selamat tinggal, Mickey."
Putri melambaikan tangan dan berkata, "Selamat tinggal, Minnie."
Suami melambai, agak lemah, dan berkata, "Selamat tinggal, Money."



A Chinese man rings his boss, Me no work I sick.
Boss says, When Im sick, I make love with my wife. Try that.
Two hours later the Chinese man rings back, Me better, you got nice house.
CERITA LUCU EMPAT

A doctor says to his patient, I have a bad news and a worse news.
Oh dear, whats the bad news? asks the patient.
The doctor replies, You only have 24 hours to live.
Thats terrible, said the patient. How can the news possibly be worse?
The doctor replies, Ive been trying to contact you since yesterday.
CERITA LUCU LIMA

Grandma and her little grandson were in the park picking up ripe walnuts on a beautiful fall day.
These are the kind of nuts your Daddy loves best, she said.
The little boy replied, Maybe he likes these things best but the nuts I like are doughnuts!
CERITA LUCU ENAM

Mom was preparing the two children for bed and was telling bedtime stories. She remarked that
God made eyes to see, ears to hear, noses to smell and feet to run.
The little girl sat up and said, But, Momma, I guess God got kinda mixed up with Tom, here,
because Toms nose runs and his feet smell!
CERITA LUCU TUJUH

A man called his friends house and a small voice greeted him.
Is your Daddy there? he asked.
Yes.
Could I speak with him?
Hes busy, the little voice replied.
Well, can I speak to your mother?
Nope, she is busy, too.
Well then, let me talk with your brother.
Hes busy, too.
For goodness sakes, what are they so busy doing?
They are looking for me!
Teacher: Why are you late, Budi?
Budi: Because of a sign down the road.
Teacher: What does a sign have to do with you being late?
Budi: The sign said, School Ahead, Go Slow!
Guru :Mengapa kamu telat, Budi?
Budi :Karena perintah rambu lalu lintas, pak?
Guru :Emang rambu lalu lintas memerintahkan apa?
Budi :Rambunya bertuliskan, sekolah di depan, jalan pelan-pelan.

A curious child asked his mother: Mommy, why are some of your hairs turning grey?
The mother tried to use this occasion to teach her child: It is because of you, dear. Every bad
action of yours will turn one of my hairs grey!
The child replied innocently: Now I know why grandmother has only grey hairs on her head.
Seorang anak kecil yang penasaran bertanya pada ibunya: Mah, mengapa rambut mamah ada
yang warna abu-abu (uban, red)?
Ibunya mencoba memanfaatkan kesempatan ini untuk mengajari anaknya: Ini karena kamu,
sayang. Setiap tingkah nakal yang kamu lakukan akan membuat rambut mamah jadi abu-abu!
Dengan polos si anak menjawab: Sekarang saya tahu mengapa nenek rambutnya abu-abu
semua.

The Great Father

Father: "I have a bride for you, marry her"
Son: "No, I want to choose my own bride"
Father: "But this girl is very special, she was the daughter of bill gates"
Son: "Well... in this case I would say yes."

Furthermore, the father approaches Bill Gates.
Father: "I have a husband for your daughter"
Bill Gates: "But my daughter is too young to be married!"
Dad: "This young man is a vice-president of the world bank"
Bill Gates: "Hmmm, in this case I will say ok"

Finally, the father goes to see the president of the World Bank.
Father: "I have a young man to be the vice president of the World Bank"
President: "But I do not need a vice president!"
Father: "But he is the son bill gates"

President: "Really? In this case I would say OK"

Arti :

Ayah yang Hebat

Ayah: "Aku mempunyai calon istri untukmu, menikahlah dengannya"
Anak: "Tidak, aku ingin memilih pengantinku sendiri!!"
Ayah: "Tetapi gadis ini sangat spesial, dia adalah putri bill gates"
Anak: "Baiklah, dalam kasus ini saya akan berkata ya."

Selanjutnya, sang Ayah mendekati Bill Gates.

Ayah: "Saya mempunyai calon suami untuk putri Anda"
Bill Gates: "Tetapi putri saya terlalu muda untuk dinikahi oleh seorang laki-laki!"
Ayah: "Anak muda ini adalah wakil presiden bank dunia"
Bill Gates: "Hmmm, pada kasus ini saya akan bilang ok"

Akhirnya Ayah pergi menemui presiden Bank Dunia.

Ayah: "Saya mempunyai seorang anak muda untuk menjadi wakil presiden bank dunia"
Presiden: "tetapi saya tidak membutuhkan wakil presiden!"
Ayah: "tetapi dia adalah menantu bill gates"
Presiden: "Benarkah? kalau begitu ya."


The Policemans Ball
A woman in a hurry to get her daughter to school on time was pulled over for speeding.
The mom smiled at her daughter and said Dont worry dear! I can get out of this ticket.
The cop approached the car and he asked Mam do you know why I pulled you over? With a
big smile she replied Sure you are selling tickets to the policemans ball.
He then said, Mam, I am a State Trooper, we dont have b Ball Polisi itu
Seorang wanita terburu-buru untuk mendapatkan putrinya ke sekolah tepat waktu menepi untuk
mempercepat.
Ibu itu tersenyum pada putrinya dan berkata "Jangan khawatir sayang! Saya bisa keluar dari tiket
ini. "
Polisi itu mendekati mobil dan ia bertanya "Mam kau tahu mengapa aku menarik Anda lebih?"
Dengan senyum lebar dia menjawab "Tentu Anda menjual tiket ke bola polisi."
Dia kemudian berkata, "Mam, saya seorang Negara Trooper, kami tidak memiliki bola."
alls.


The Boss and The Trainee
A Man joined a big Multi National Company as a trainee. On his first day he dialed the pantry
and shouted into the phone, Get me a coffee quickly!
The voice from the other side responded, You fool youve dialed the wrong extension! Do you
know who youre talking to, dumbo?
No, replied the trainee.
Its the Managing Director of the company, you fool! The man shouted back, And do you
know who YOU are talking to, you fool?
No, replied the Managing Director. Thats Good!, replied the trainee and put down the
phone!
HaHa! I hope you learn from this and that this never happens to you!!

The Boss dan Trainee The
A Man bergabung besar Multi National Company sebagai trainee. Pada hari pertama ia keluar pantry
dan berteriak di telepon, "Dapatkan saya kopi dengan cepat!"
Suara dari sisi lain menjawab, "Kamu bodoh kau keluar ekstensi yang salah! Apakah Anda tahu siapa
Anda bicara, dumbo? "
Tidak ", jawab peserta pelatihan.
"Ini adalah Managing Director perusahaan, tolol!" Pria itu berteriak kembali, "Dan kau tahu siapa yang
ANDA ajak bicara, bodoh?"
"Tidak", jawab Managing Director. "Thats baik!", Jawab trainee dan meletakkan telepon!
HaHa! Saya harap Anda belajar dari ini dan bahwa ini tidak pernah terjadi pada Anda!