TA Training01 Editor Tips

Editing Tips for newly qualified editors
Copyright @ 2014 WritePath Inc. All rights reserved.

2 Editor Manual Tips
WHATS INSIDE?
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This document will cover editing tips for newly hired
editors. Content as follows:

General Editing Tips.3
Writing Critique Tips..6
Proofreading Checklist9
Recommendation Letter Editing.11
Personal Statement Editing...15

GENERAL EDITING TIPS (for Premium Editing Service)
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1. Read the entire essay before editing. By reading the entire essay first, you can
find organization flaws and concentrate on paragraph-level and essay-level improvements.
You will also see whether the submitted essay FULLY answers the question. If it does not,
you should focus the essay on the question, adding and deleting where appropriate. If much
more content is needed (2 - 3 full paragraphs), make suggestions in the critique but be
specific.
2. If the content is not good, edit the essay anyway. You may suggest a better
topic or approach in the critique, but do your best with what you have. Often the client does
not have the time to make large-scale changes before the application is due. In most cases,
the content is acceptable.
3. Make significant changes. The client expects an edited version that is substantially
better than the original and a critique that tells him/her why it is better, so do NOT limit your
edits to the sentence level: cut, add and reorganize at will. Many times, you will find the
need to rearrange the entire essay, including its paragraph structure and sentence order.
Clients often complain of insufficient changes, so you should work to improve the overall
impact of the essay instead of limiting your corrections to grammar and wording. If the
average essay is a C, you should return at least a B+/A-.
4. Do NOT change the meaning of the essay. You can alter things at will, but do
not change the meaning of the essay unless you're sure the client made an error. In
addition, be careful with facts. For example, don't misuse medical jargon or alter the details of
an experiment.
5. The essay should be compelling and should flow well. It should not put the
reader to sleep. Eliminate almost all instances of passive voice to improve the flow and
style, and to reduce wordiness. Also, if the client is starting 2 or 3 consecutive sentences with
the word "I," the essay lacks proper flow and reads like a choppy collection of simple
sentences. You might also need to add a new sentence here and there to make the essay
more compelling, to clarify something, or to improve flow. Start strong. End Strong.

6. Eliminate vagueness and clichs. The essay should be personal and NOT
contain vague generalizations ("society needs more educated professionals") or clichs
("the value of hard work and perseverance," "learning from mistakes," "realizing my potential,"
"satisfy my ambitions," etc). The best way to avoid vagueness and clichs when making a
point is to use details and specific examples.
7. Remember that clients do not have weaknesses. This isn't true, of course,
but many clients concentrate on their own negatives unnecessarily. Try to spin negatives
into positives. For example, a client's lack of experience in a field should not be the focus of
a sentence; rather, discuss how the client is working to improve their expertise in it. It is your
job to help the client explain their weaknesses and, if possible, present them as strengths.
8. Reduce wordiness and observe limits. Subject every sentence to this simple
test: is there a more concise way to express the same thought? Still, as a rule of thumb, the
final word count should be within 80% of the original, unless the client requested a
dramatic cut. For example, don't cut a 1000-word essay to 500 words if the client did not
specify a word limit. Conversely, if the word limit is 1000 words and the essay is 1030 words,
cut 30 words.
9. Manage your time. The time you spend on an essay is at your discretion and should
be based on what's needed to perform a high quality job. Rushing through a job almost
always leads to typos and grammatical errors that are embarrassing to you and Top Admit
and displeasing to clients. Almost all editors do notice a learning curve and get much quicker
within the first 5 - 15 orders. As a rule of thumb, if you spend 1.5 hours per 900 words, you'll
make about $20 - $25 per hour.
10. China vs. Taiwan. As a majority of our clients are from either China or Taiwan,
please do not commit a mistake when addressing these places. You can reference Taiwan as
R.O.C. or the Republic of China but be sure to offer a sentence to explain this really means
Taiwan. Due to Chinas unique history, you should probably refer to Macau, Hong Kong, and
Taiwan as separate entities apart from China. Although Peoples Republic of China is well
known, you should avoid P.R.O.C. as this is not universally recognized. Generally referring to
this nation as China is sufficient. Some applicants like to refer to Mainland China which is
an indirect reference to a China that excludes Taiwan.

11. PROOFREAD!!!!!! Please proofread every time you finish your work. We suggest
you accept all tracked changes after your revision is done and proofread again to spot any
mistakes, since track changes often leads to typographical and spacing errors.

CRITIQUE TIPS
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1. Be thorough. All critiques should be a minimum 1 page long, single spaced, in
Microsoft Word. A thorough critique will be somewhere between 2 - 3 pages, depending on
the length of the client's essay.
2. Explain your key changes. Quote passages of the original essay and let the client
know how and why you improved them. You need not justify every change you make, nor
should you, but do mention the major changes or provide an example of a typical change.
The best-rated editors write long critiques to let the client know why they made the
changes they did. It is extremely helpful to write the critique in a different window of Microsoft
Word (you can click "Alt" button on your keyboard, hold it, and then click "Tab" button to
change back and forth of two windows). This allows you to cut and paste easily the original
and the correction in MS Word and makes it easier to critique an essay paragraph by
paragraph as you edit. It is harder to critique after editing the whole essay, especially for
essays of 1000+ words.
3. Address concerns. Your critiques will influence the feedback score you receive from
the client feedbacks. Make sure to address the client's concerns specifically. For
example, "I know you were concerned about the conclusion, so I strengthened it by"
4. Stay professional. Adopt a professional consultant-client tone, not a teacher-
student tone. Also, NEVER admit ignorance, such as, "I assume you are using this word
correctly, but I don't know because I am unfamiliar with the field." If you are unsure about a
term or fact, a quick Internet search can usually uncover the information you need. Also, don't
preface your thoughts with "I feel" or "I think." As far as the client is concerned, you are the
editorial authority, so you must write authoritatively.
5. Be Assertive. Clients bought the service because they are in need of your expertise.
Do not leave comments to the customer instructing them to decide what they should keep or
not; it is your job to make those judgment calls.

CRITIQUE FORMAT (example )
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Please follow these instructions for returning clients essays and replying to their questions.
The sequence consists of:

1) Opening
2) Overall Assessment
3) Paragraph-by-Paragraph
4) Critiques/Explanation Closing

1. Opening
I enjoyed reading about your academic and work experience, your goal of becoming a teacher,
and your decision to pursue a PhD in History at Boston University. You have good work
experience and a strong academic background, and seem well suited to pursue this field. Your
original essay was about 450 words, which I expanded slightly to 500 words. You cited some very
good examples, and your essay was well structured. It did need additional details, and my
revisions focused on word choice to make your essay sound more professional.

2. Overall assessment
Overall your supervisor's recommendation letter contained a lot of strong, positive points, but there
were also some issues that needed to be addressed by a professional editor. One significant
problem is that that your supervisor does not appear to work closely with you or know you well.
Such phrases as I see her in our monthly meetings indicate that those are his only opportunities
to work with you. The admissions committee wants to read recommendations from people who
know you well, so if it is at all possible, you should ask another person to write your
recommendation. That said, I did change the wording to imply that your supervisor knows you
better. Another problem was that a few phrases sounded negative. She might not be the best-
prepared analyst Ive ever supervised implies that you're not as educated or competent as your
co- workers. This had to be removed. I rewrote a few other phrases to make them sound more
positive.

3. Paragraph-by-paragraph critiques
Paragraph 1: I deleted the opening quotation by Robert Frost, not because of any problem with the
quote, but because it's a common, almost clichd way to begin an essay. Admissions officers read
thousands of essays, and you don't want their eyes to glaze over with your first sentence.
I also deleted most of your first paragraph, which was a weak introduction. For short college
essays, get to the point quickly. The essay loses its thunder if it begins by hinting in general terms
at the content of the essay before actually telling the story.
Paragraph 2: This paragraph reflects a mature attitude, rather than your anger [victim of a fugitive
father, etc.].
Paragraph 3: This paragraph explains in detail how you will apply these lessons to college.
Paragraph 4: Your original conclusion contained a number of clichs. If you express the same
thought in fewer words, your essay will stand out as refreshing and powerful. The last sentence
references the opening paragraph, so the essay comes full circle.

4. Closing
I hope that these revisions and comments have been helpful to you. I enjoyed reading and working
on your essay, and I wish you the best of luck with the admissions process. I sincerely hope you
find the changes beneficial.

Good luck,
Editors Name Top Admit USA

P.S. You should receive a link to a customer satisfaction survey located at My Orders. I
encourage you to take the time to tell Top Admit what you thought of my work.

COMMUNICATION EMAIL

Always be courteous and professional. When responding to a clients question or request for an
additional edit, please write something like the following (mandatory):

Dear [clients name]:
Thank you for your follow-up question. Please find attached the new edit of your essay. If you have
any further questions, please don't hesitate to ask. If you are satisfied with my work, I hope you will
give me a good feedback score and recommend Top Admit to your friends.

PROOFREADING CHECKLIST
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WRITING
Are there any very long or short paragraphs? If so, is there a compelling reason for
these?
Did I repeat words unnecessarily?
Did I use "thereby, thus, therefore?" If so, did they make the sentence wordy or
awkward?
Did I punctuate correctly?
Did I eliminate exclamation points (except in dialogue)?
Did I use capitalization clearly and consistently?
Do the subjects agree in number with the verbs?
Did I place the periods and commas inside the quotation marks?
Did I keep contractions to a minimum? Do apostrophes appear in the right places?
Did I catch every single typo?

STYLE
Is the introduction engaging and does it make the reader want to read on?
Did I improve the organization if necessary?
Does the essay progress in a logical manner?
Does one sentence / paragraph flow naturally into the next?
Did I rewrite most of the sentences?
Is the conclusion strong? Is it revised significantly? Does it provide closure?
Do I use varied sentence structure?
Is the opening paragraph personal and compelling?
Is every thought expressed concisely? Did I eliminate wordiness?
Did I use the active voice whenever possible?
Do I have a reason for using any form of the verb "to be"?
Have I eliminated clichs and vague statements?
Did I start with an action or image if feasible?
Does the essay show rather than tell? Did I show the traits of the author through
experience or did I merely talk about the traits in vague, weak sentences?

Did I overuse adjectives and adverbs?
Did I eliminate clichs?
Did I delete redundancies?
Does the essay sound interesting?

CONTENT
Does the essay focus on the question asked?
Did I spin any client weaknesses to be less negative?
Did I add and delete content where necessary?
Did I elaborate on unclear thoughts?
Did I back up each point with an example? Did I use concrete and personal details?
Was I specific?
What about the essay makes it memorable?
Did I increase the synergies between multiple essays and ensure no repetition? Do the
essays form a consistent image of the applicant?
Does the essay make the applicant seem likeable and qualified?

CRITIQUE
Is the first sentence of the critique complimentary?
Is the tone professional (consultant / client) and not condescending (teacher / student)?
Did I state my opinions in an authoritative voice rather than prefacing my thoughts with
"I think," "I feel," etc.?
Did I mention major changes along with passages of the original essay?
Is the critique at least 1 page long?
Did I specifically mention how I improved the intro and/or conclusion?
Did I address all of the client's concerns/instructions submitted with the order?

RECOMMENDATION LETTER EDITING
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ORGANIZATION

1) Introduction: The letter of recommendation should begin Dear Admission Committee
Members or To Whom it May Concern. The letter should begin by describing the purpose
of the letter: It is a pleasure to recommend *Mr. X* for admission to graduate school at
Harvard University. The letter should also focus specifically on how the person knows you
and is qualified to offer a recommendation: I became acquainted with *Mr. X*, during the
freshman course, Fundamentals of Astrophysics in 2004, and have known him for four years.
I was also his academic advisor and supervisor of his undergraduate thesis The Feasibility of
Earth-Like Planets in Nearby Solar Systems.

2) Body: The letter should then transition to the body of the letter that describes your work,
personal characteristics and skills, and ultimately finish with a conclusion that summarizes the
reasons this person feels confident you should be offered admission.

3) Conclude with a signature block that describes the persons name, and position title:

John T. Chin
Associate Professor of Astronomy
Wuhan University, China

SPECIFICITY

The recommendation needs to be specific about work and accomplishments.

Weaker: Mr. X received an A in my class, and received an A on almost every project.
Stronger: Mr. X led a group that utilized our university telescope to plot astral phenomena.
Mr. X supplemented his field research with library research on the methodologies of planet

discoveries in other solar systems. Finally, Mr. X developed a new hypothesis about how new
planets can be identified using mathematical calculations in lieu of direct observation.

The first statement tells the committee very little about the applicant. The admissions
committee can read the transcript to learn about the A grade. Instead focusing on the
students contributions and accomplishments is more impressive. The recommender should
also provide support for their observations.

Weaker: Mr. X is always very meticulous in his work.
Stronger: Mr. Xs research paper demonstrated a meticulous attention to his research
results by comparing how they varied with results found in other studies.

Again, the key is in the details. The first statement is a generic compliment the second
focuses the evidence that shows specifically why the applicant believes the student is
meticulous.

PERSONAL CHARACTERISTICS

Try to emphasize the following characteristics:
1. Leadership how the candidate assumed a leadership role in working with other
students.
2. Initiative how the student/employee went beyond the required assignment.
3. Teamwork this is different from leadership; how the applicant interacts with other
students, especially as this relates to students with other backgrounds and cultures.
4. Diligence More than simply the student was a high-achiever, but they did extra work
to complete their assignments
5. Creativity Similar to initiative how the student had their own ideas, hypothesis,
and theories that show originality in their work
6. Multi-cultural Approaches Especially for social sciences, how the student
incorporated ideas from other cultures, ethnicities and countries in their analysis.
7. Analytical Abilities How the student integrated different theories and concepts, and
blended them to create a unique solution to a problem, or to solve a problem.
8. Commitment How the student is committed to their field, or has a belief system that
motivates them to accomplish their goals. The recommendation should state more

than the student worked to get an A but they are committed to the passion of
scientific discovery or the field of anthropology.

JUDGE THE STUDENT POSITIVELY RELATIVELY TO OTHERS

Even more effective than stating a student is an excellent student is to determine they are
superior to their peers.

Weaker Statement: Mr. X has excellent analytical and mathematical abilities.
Stronger Statement: Relative to other students in the astrophysics program, Mr. X. has far
superior analytical and mathematic abilities than his peers.

It is also important to show the student works harder, or went beyond other
students/employees in their assignments.

Weaker Statement: Mr. X offered an interesting theory and perspective in the conclusion of
his research paper.
Stronger Statement: Unlike other students who simply focused on completing the
assignment, Mr. X developed his own unique theory to explain the phenomena.

TURN WEAKNESS INTO POSITIVE

Some recommendation guidelines insist the recommendation feature strengths and
weaknesses of the applicant. In this instance, it is best if the recommender can feature the
weakness as a need to pursue an advanced education.

Weaker Statement: Mr. X is weak in their understanding of basic business concepts which
will limit his potential in this field.
Stronger Statement: Although Mr. X has outstanding skills in accounting and finance,
gaining a more comprehensive understanding of strategic management will assist his career.
This is precisely why Mr. X. would benefit from the MBA program at the University of
Chicago.

TONE

The Recommendation should sound warm and personal. One indication of how positively
the recommender is about an applicant can be detected based on how they reference the
applicant and the purpose of the recommendation in the opening paragraph.

Weaker Statement: I have been asked to write a letter of recommendation for the applicant
for admission to the graduate program at your university.
Stronger Statement: It is an honor to recommend Cheng Weng for admission to the
Masters program in Economics at Cornell University.

PERSONAL STATEMENT EDITING
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ESSENTIAL COMPONENTS TO COVER
All essays from elite graduate schools across the country have the same basic components:
1) Academic Objectives
2) Motivation
3) Career Goals
4) Aptitude
5) Interest in the University/Program
Regardless of whether the essay explicitly mentions these items, you should include them in
the personal statement.

ACADEMIC OBJECTIVES

Put simply you need to explain why candidate is applying to college or graduate school, and
why applying to school at this point in their career, and ultimately, how a degree will contribute
to their understanding, knowledge, and future career. Be very specific about the program; for
example --- if candidate is interested in international trade, explain why they should obtain a
degree in economics, as opposed to political science, or an M.B.A.

Weaker Statement: Since my background is in international trade and I have good business
work experience, I decided to pursue a Masters degree in Economics.
Stronger Statement: A Masters degree in Economics will give me the knowledge to
analyze trends in international trade that will benefit businesses from emerging countries.

The first statement gives the reader some idea of why the applicant wants to earn this
degree but does not answer the question of why an MBA would not be equally important.
The second statement is very focused, and states specifically why economics training will
give them knowledge to help them perform analysis in their future career.

MOTIVATION
Should not merely show motivation for a degree, but instead focus more broadly on their
motivation for the field, and future accomplishments.
Weaker Statement: I am a very motivated student, and really want to obtain an MBA
degree.
Stronger Statement: I want to utilize knowledge gained from an MBA degree program to
return to my native China and start my own business.

The first just states candidates general interest in the degree; the stronger statement goes
beyond the degree, and describes their motivation for the knowledge obtained by gaining the
degree.

CAREER GOALS

Career goals should be mentioned in the conclusion (and potentially also in the introduction).
The Admissions Committee wants to know that if candidate is admitted as a student and
he/she succeeds, what does he/she plan to do with their education? You also have to stress
that college degree is not the ultimate goal, but merely an effective tool to benefit society.

Weaker Statement: By allowing me to gain admission, you will help me fulfill my dream of
having a graduate degree from Harvard University.
Stronger Statement: By granting me admission to Harvard University, I will gain the skills,
contacts, and intellectual inspiration to achieve my dream of improving Chinese-Taiwan
Cross-Strait Relations.

The first statement makes it appear the ultimate goal of the student is just to graduate the
second states specifically how the degree will help them achieve a career goal that benefits
society.

APTITUDE

The majority of the essay will probably focus on this element. The best method for
demonstrating aptitude is to show evidence of past accomplishments, interests, and
achievements that will allow them to succeed in the new program. Aptitude can be shown with
examples of published articles, academic achievements, background, work experience,
extracurricular activities, and volunteer work. Should also share ideas, analysis, unique
thoughts, and even predictions about the future candidates field.

INTERESTS IN A SPECIFIC UNIVERSITY & PROGRAM

While the first four categories (which may comprise 95% of THE essay) can be the same for
all the schools to which candidate is applying this section needs to be unique. In fact, even
making some minor changes to the standard essay can create a personalized effect that will
appeal to admissions committee members.

1) Name of the School
When writing a standard admissions essay, applicants are often tempted to write one
essay that mentions your institution or your program. Even if you can make the
small change of adding the schools name (and this would be different for all 10
applications that you may be sending) it can have a powerful effect.

Weaker Statement: My love for architecture has motivated me to apply for
admission to your institution.
Stronger Statement: My love for architecture has motivated me to apply for
admission to the University of Rochester.

2) Names of Professors
Another potential method of showing specific interest for a school is to research their
professors (through the Internet or their publications), and reflect on their work. It is
best to name two or three professors as some professors. For a graduate research
program, especially in the sciences, it is important to think about how applicant could
potentially fit into their laboratory research environment and what he/she can
contribute.


Weaker Statement: I would love to continue my education in economics at
the University of Chicago as it is renowned for its scholars in all fields of
economics, which is consistent with my interests.
Stronger Statement: I have been inspired by Professor Robert Fogels
economic growth models for China and India, as well as Professor Gary
Beckers research on population growth and its effect on the economy.

The second is very specific; it mentions University of Chicago professors, their
research, and by mentioning these professors and fields of interest, the applicant is
giving the reader insight into their own interests.

3. Names of Alumni
Mentioning alumni from the specific school and program can potentially help the
application. Avoid appearing to be name-dropping --- or simply using peoples
names without any real connection to the alumni.

Weaker Statement: I met professor Her-Jiun Sheu at National Chiao Tung
University who is a graduate of New York University. Since I was impressed
with his work on financial theory, I decided to apply to his alma mater, the
Stern Business School at NYU.
Stronger Statement: Due to my interests in derivatives, I arranged a
meeting with Professor Her-Jiun Sheu of National Chiao Tung University. As
a Ph.D. graduate of the Stern Business School, he gave me insights into the
program and its focus on derivate products which confirmed my interest in
this program.

In the stronger statement, it is the professors insight and knowledge of the specific
program that inspires the applicant. In addition, while the first statement implies the
applicant met the professor accidentally, the second statement implies the applicant
did some research on their field of interest (derivates) and initiated a conversation
with a professor who was an alumni knowledgeable about this program.

4. Visiting the School / Involvement in the Program


This is a positive element to add to the essay as it shows he/she have experience in
the American or United Kingdom educational system, and can succeed while
studying abroad.

Weaker Statement: I read about the graduate program in management at
the University of California at Los Angeles (UCLA) on the Internet. I am
impressed with the professors and the student body.
Stronger Statement: I first became interested in the graduate program in
management at the University of California at Los Angeles (UCLA) during the
semester I studied at UCLA as part of the Education Abroad Program. I had
an opportunity to meet the professors, and talk to students about the
graduate program.

The first statement merely states the person read about the program on the Internet,
which does not take much effort. The second statement is much stronger because
the applicant had direct experience with the program.

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