S.J.T.

J
Hello! Its been a long time! Weve never talked for what seemed to be
forever? But hey dont worry I came here in peace. Lol
I know weve offended each other, weve wounded each other and that
left us a scar on our hearts. I still feel burdened though with the thought of
you alone. For I realized that we are stupid! For letting fame of being the
most intelligent destroy our friendship even though there was another
reason.
But I realized now that we were victims, we were too young and nave
and we allowed the dictations of our parents, the judgments of our teachers
and other people define us. Although I also remember hating the idea of
competing for the top at first then.
How are you? I wanted to ask yoau but I could see that your smile was
not sincere the last time we saw each other. I admit it, I thought when we
graduated our rivalry would also end. But the knife left a scar, it left us a
mark. And that no matter what we do to erase it, we cant. Rather it reminds
me more, like whenever I feel the air I breathe. Still, I feel myself sink and I
lose my self-confidence just by the thought of you alone.
They marked us, our teachers. Only that lucky you, you were known as
the superior one, while me? Inferior. Thats why I admit that a small portion
of my motivation was to reverse that mark through shifting to
BSAccountancy with the goal to pass it. Although before Ive decided the
society marked you as the most inferior among the inferiors. I dont know. I
cant help it but to mock your misery then because I divulge that I hated you.
Why? You didnt wait for me. I said Ill seal the markings myself but you just
made yourself that way, you just revealed your true color because of your
mistake. But I guess that was what you call karma.
But still I dont want to just claim your throne then because I want to
do something . I want to prove myself! I want to pass the retention policy in
the BSAccountancy to be able to find what was lost. To find all my hopes in
myself, my self-confidence, the other part of me.
But guess what?
Those were all back then. Those were in my past.
For finally, I found myself not through the fulfillment of my
expectations and aspirations but through my salvation. Ive changed, maybe
not totally but at least Im better than who I was before. Its because I found
a very different life since I had a relationship with God. You may not believe
it. Even me? If I were the same me back then I would also laugh at what Im
saying right now but words can never describe this gift.
All I know now is Im so blessed and Im so thankful to Him. For he gave
me my new nice classmates, new environment, new challenge, new friends,
reconciliation in my family, good grades, provision, personal growth, in short
a new great life. And I hope youd meet Him too, youll never regret it!
My reason of being in the BSAccountancy and living my life is not the
same anymore. But I am grateful, for not because of that I wouldnt be here

right now. Dont worry I think the only burden in my heart now is the thought
of you hating me. For I already I forgave you and also those who had
oppressed me in my high school days.
Im sorry. How I wish to say it in person.
P.S. Hows baby Cassie? Invite me on your wedding day huh? Dont
worry Im over my infatuation age with him. Lol
Your Frienemy,
Jovelyn P. Ordonia