Rule Numbere Uno

Set it or dead it - 'cause if you ain't steppin' you should just fucking forget it.
Rule Number Two
Do what you have to do - you don't have to love the bitch just represent for the crew. No
excuse will do - if the honey is fine, get off your behind.
Number Three
This you should know - If she ain't giving it up then she's slowing up your flow
Rule Number Four
If you don't have a shot then don't cock block - no reason to fuck up the other brothers in
the spot
Rule Number Five
Completely necessary - if you go out macking you must be packing
Number Six
Don't be afraid to get slapped - if you are a mack you'll always bounce back
Rule Number Seven
Always bring enough money - don't spend it on the hos only spend it on the honeys
Number Eight Should have been number one to me
Nice guys finish last - and since you're a mack your mission is the ass
Rule Number Nine
Have no shame in your game - if you play high post you'll never get the fame
And Rule Number Ten
Always go for what you know - don't stop the groove - make the bitch say NO

And kids just remember it's ok to be a fiend - I don't care if the bitch is seventeen! Follow
these rules you'll be the mack of all macks - givin' headaches to Excedrin and knocking
the shit out of Exlax.
The secrets revealed.
First things first, please don't reveal these secrets to anyone. If every Tom, Dick, and
Harry knows, it is not a secret. Anyway, with that said I will begin by giving you insight
into the great world of macking. I don't guarantee results or anything like that, but I think
that you will find the following information very useful:
Play strip poker.
This may sound childish, or stupid, or even outrageous, but if you win, you will never
thank me enough. So how do you win? Don't be foolish! You have to cheat. And friend,
when I say cheat, I mean you really have to cheat. First off, make sure that you are
dealing the cards. Second, examine everyone's discards. Third, make sure that you have
the best cards. That's all that is to it. You can deal from both ends of the deck, you can
palm cards; you can do whatever you want (do whatever you have to do), because if you
hold the best hand - that woman (or those women) playing with you are eventually going
to be undressed. I have played with the loosest of the loose and the tightest of the tight,
and all of them were naked by the end of the night. It didn't matter if they were counting
jewelry or socks, or any of that other drama that girls will try to pull. You can't stop a
winning hand... especially if you are cheating.
Get a phone voice.
All great speakers had these melodious voices that carried and mesmerized. To be a
successful mack, you must follow in their ways. First you have to drop your voice an
octave or two. Then you have to extend your words so that they float across the phone
lines. It's almost as if you want a slur or a drawl, but not to that extreme. Don't make it
obvious. Mesmerize, hypnotize, mack! Create a dream sensation, yet don't try to sound
dreamy. Sounding "dreamy" can result in sounding cheesy, or even worse, you'll hear the
line, "you're like a brother to me".
Ok, now that we have the voice, remember to change speeds, tones, pitch, and subject
often - you have to be at least two steps ahead of them in order to win - you are ready to
kick lills (lyrics). This simple task is too often destroyed by impatient people: you have to
relax and take your time. Pause. The point of kicking your lyrics over the phone is to get
off of the phone and into a place where you can bone. That much should be obvious. It
also helps to put girls at ease, both on the phone and behind closed doors. They feel like
they know you, and you get to know what makes them tick so that you don't tick them
off. Stay on point or else you will lose points!
Back in the day we used to call this your calling card. If you had a good calling card, then
it was very likely that you would have people sweating you. Man, I used to have three or

four a night just to keep my game up to par. My calling card was tight. I played a slow
jams tape in the background to fill the silence and to send those subliminal messages.
Even then, I would bug out - it's only natural if your lyrics are hitting - I would wash
dishes with girlies on the phone. Don't sleep, the sound of rushing water soothes the inner
soul. A melodious voice singing a tune of romance. That's what it is to hypnotize! The
power of suggestion can go a long way.
Far too often this is overlooked. Have patience good friends. Allow time to work for you.
And most of all, remember that you can get anything you want in this world if you ask
for it the right way. People are just inclined to say yes. It's human nature. Exploit it.
Drinks at the bar on my American Express?
As a general rule I don't buy drinks for girls. Some guys do. Whatever you choose to do,
all I can say is make sure she drinks your booze and make sure you reap the benefits of
her inebriated state. Be sure to do this before it is too late - a guy might just slip up from
behind and scoop a girl from you. As Biggie said, "as soon as he buys that wine I'll just
creep up from behind and ask you what your interests arethings to make you smile,
what numbers to dial". Even worse, you could get a cock blocker! I'll touch upon those
characters later, as there is a way to deal with them.
Only go for fly girls.
We all get desperate sometimes. We all get lonely. We all get horny at two or three in the
morning when there isn't much available but the girl at the bar that you very well know is
not up to par. Friend, let me tell you, you'd rather get dissed by a fly girl than an ugly girl.
You would rather dis a fly girl than an ugly girl. You would rather go out with a fly girl
than an ugly girl. My point - don't mess around with ugly girls. You'll find yourself a lot
happier and eventually you will get a fly girl - after all, it's the law of averages. There are
more than seven billion people on Earth.
Half of them are female. Even if only one percent of the females on earth are pretty, you
still have over thirty-five million women to choose from. One of them will have to like
you.
Somebody's Sleeping in My Bed
Never let the girl sleep in your bed. I have a friend who sums this up by saying, "Never
take a girl home with you." That's not to say that you can't go to her room, or her house,
or her bed, I'm just saying that it is a good policy to keep women out of your home (you
may find it harder to get them to leave than it was to get them there). And that's the
double truth Ruth!
Freak It

So now that you have the females exactly where you want them, how do you get them to
stay? Forgive me for sounding crude or rude - make sure they have an orgasm. I can't tell
you how many guys mess this one up! They think because a girl moaned or yelled she
was satisfied. Boy, were they wrong. These are the same guys that will tell you all you
have to do is this or touch that. Whatever man. These are the guys who fall victim to the
fake orgasm, or the ones who just don't care. Either way, we aren't trying to go that route.
Straight up and down, no pun intended, you must make that woman to want to have your
children and your children's children. You have to make her sing in the shower, hum
while chewing her food, and skip around town all day the next day. No tales or
techniques, no freaky moves, just reality; if you truly satisfy a woman, she will hug you
and love you and think of you for the rest of her life. The girl will be obsessed and
addicted to your product (and it isn't narcotics).
If you are really good, the repercussions are obvious - her friends will look at you
differently (they want a piece), her mom will look at you differently (she wants a piece),
heck, even her dad might try to figure out what you have under the hood of your car. I am
simply saying this, you don't have to be Don Juan, but when you get your groove on,
make sure she remembers the song the next day, next week, next month. If you do, she'll
give you anything you want. Now you say, woah, wait a minute, aren't you the same guy
that got dissed and dismissed? Yes, I am. I am also the guy that has had girls try to buy
anything to keep me (livin' better now, Gucci sweater now, drop top BM's, I am the
man girlfriend). The thing about this, if you ask any woman - just ask - they will tell you
they want to be satisfied. Believe me guy, it is not that hard to do
Just a friend
The one line you want to avoid at all costs (other than NO) is just a friend. In fact I'd
rather not talk to some girl than to be her friend. Straight up and down, I don't have any
female friends. No mistakes allowed! The girls I know are either potential girlfriends,
girlfriends, or ex-girlfriends. No reason for treason - just keeping it real. If you like a girl,
go for what you know. If she says no, then move along, be gone. Why sit around and
waste time? I know some brothers that will try to do this and that to get a girl for ages and
they still don't understand that she is not looking at them as a man - "You're like a brother
to me" they say, or "...can't we just be friends?" or "..you're not my type..." Don't
believe the hype. Tell the girl this, "I only have bousom buddies, kissing cousins, and
fucking friends - which one are you going to be?"
Refer to the Ten Mack Commandments if you require further assistance on this subject
matter.
Nice Guys
I once had a long conversation with with this girl named Anna about being nice to girls.
My conclusion was simple - to get a girl, you have to be an asshole. To keep her you had
to be nice enough. If you didn't care, you did whatever you wanted - which really made
you an asshole. But if you wanted her to obsess about you, all that was required was one

good night. You may feel I put too much emphasis on this whole idea of satisfaction and
orgasms and one good night. You may not think I am right. All I can say is this, if you
don't believe me, try it for yourself, or just ask some girl - believe me, I am preaching the
gospel truth.
You see, the sad part of being of female is that there are loads of guys out there that want
to get to know "you" better. Not just you on the outside, but more importantly what's on
the inside - or at least inside the clothes that they wear. The worst thing that a woman can
ever do is try to be nice about telling a guy no. The worst thing a guy can do is take that,
and pretend to be happy just being "friends". I have enough friends. Call me foul - I don't
care - that is the reality of the world. To make matters worse, everybody is lying about it.
Hypocritical bullshit - please excuse me, the subject is very dear to me. How many times
have you heard a girl say that she wants "a nice guy". Fellas beware of those three words
- they are often followed by the ever destructive "just a friend" and "platonic
relationship" speeches girls give to get rid of guys that would be perfectly nice. You see,
girls want an asshole. They don't admit it. They won't say it. But it's the truth!
Desert Storm
This little phrase is reflective of the Desert Storm Illness that has plagued those troops
that served in the war. Similarly, albeit not as serious, kissing some random girl that you
just met has glory. It is a noble deed. It takes skill, integrity, wits (and lack of zits). But it
also comes with risks - sudden mysterious illnesses have emerged from such encounters coughs, sore throats, cold sores and that sort of minor inconvenience. Be aware and be
careful out there.
Biology
CD's with crazy bassIf you hang around long enough, you will probably hear a
description of someone that includes 'CD's with crazy bass'. This is not referring to
someone's musical selection. We used to speak in code (it is really home made slang)
during high school and many of the code words have remained others died out. The slick
rating scale for describing someone's breasts will never go out of style. It's actually very
simple, bra sizes are measured using a letter scale from small to large (A, B, C, D, etc).
It doesn't take a genius or a subscriber to the Victoria Secret catalog to figure out what's
what when it comes to women. So we use this system with a bit of flare: "She had some
A's but she was mad cool and very cute" or "she was rocking on the prehistoric BC
level". So if you found a fine looking young lady with real large breasts (no implants),
you would tell the fellas, "Yo, she had CD's with crazy bass!" That generally meant that
her breasts wiggled or jiggled when she walked - which can be a good thing. In general
bigger is better, as long as it isn't too much. The same thing is true for the backsides of
females. Contrary to their insecure feelings about this, guys like big butts (remember Sir
Mix-A-Lot?).
Gravity

I had an argument once about the physics of big breasts. Essentially my argument was
based on gravity and the simple fact that no one likes 'saggy titties'. Aside from my poor
word choice, my argument was solid - old men have it easier than old women because
gravity doesn't play as great a role on their physical appearance. The young lady I was
arguing with was outraged to say the least. I fed her anger by describing her fate of 'saggy
titties'.

Before I go friends, I would like to thank a few that helped bring this macking manual to
an end so that you all could read and enjoy it: my brother Messiah, brother James, my
man Stu (the chemist), James Smith (007 or gin & tonic), brother Rob and brother Bob,
my brother Josh (J-Low the pimp), brother Pierre (fae7), the L Masters; Pills, Curtis, and
John-John. 'Nuff respect due to the rest of the crew: Rami, Rob D'Ambroiso, Kwasic, and
Damon. I also give respect to the people that put us on the map and kept us on the map by
spreading the rumdogs name around town. To those that looked out for us, thought about
us, and remembered us - thank you! The rest of the people I would like to thank are
mentioned on the website somewhere out there.