Muslim Wedding Ceremony

Practices
The only requirement for Muslim
weddings is the signing of a marriage
contract. Marriage traditions differ
depending on culture, Islamic sect, and
observance of gender separation rules.
Most marriages are not held in mosques,
and men and women remain separate
during the ceremony and reception.
Since Islam sanctions no official clergy,
any Muslim who understands Islamic
tradition can officiate a wedding. If you
are having your wedding in a mosque,
many have marriage officers, called qazi
or madhun, who can oversee the
marriage.

Meher
The marriage contract includes a meher -- a formal statement
specifying the monetary amount the groom will give the bride. There
are two parts to the meher: a prompt due before the marriage is
consummated and a deferred amount given to the bride throughout
her life. Today, many couples use the ring as the prompt because
the groom presents it during the ceremony. The deferred amount
can be a small sum -- a formality -- or an actual gift of money, land,
jewelry, or even an education. The gift belongs to the bride to use as
she pleases, unless the marriage breaks up before consummation.
The meher is considered the bride's security and guarantee of
freedom within the marriage.

Nikah
The marriage contract is signed in a nikah ceremony, in which the
groom or his representative proposes to the bride in front of at least
two witnesses, stating the details of the meher. The bride and groom
demonstrate their free will by repeating the word qabul ("I accept,"
in Arabic) three times. Then the couple and two male witnesses sign
the contract, making the marriage legal according to civil and
religious law. Following traditional Islamic customs, the bride and
groom may share a piece of sweet fruit, such as a date. If men and

women are separated for the ceremony, a male representative

called a wali acts in the bride's behalf during the nikah.

Vows and Blessings

The officiant may add an additional religious ceremony following the
nikah, which usually includes a recitation of the Fatihah -- the first
chapter of the Quran -- and durud (blessings). Most Muslim couples
do not recite vows; rather, they listen as their officiant speaks about
the meaning of marriage and their responsibilities to each other and
to Allah. However, some Muslim brides and grooms do say vows,
such as this common recitation:
Bride: "I, (bride's name) offer you myself in marriage in accordance
with the instructions of the Holy Quran and the Holy Prophet, peace
and blessing be upon him. I pledge, in honesty and with sincerity, to
be for you an obedient and faithful wife."
Groom: "I pledge, in honesty and sincerity, to be for you a faithful
and helpful husband."

Muslim Wedding Vows

Muslim couples do not generally recite vows but rather listen to the
words of the imam, or cleric (although any adult male Muslim may
officiate), who speaks about the significance of the commitment of
the marriage and the couple's responsibilities toward each other and
Allah. The bride and groom are asked three times if they accept
each other in marriage according to the terms of their traditional

marriage contract, or Nikah. Then they sign, the marriage is sealed,

and the gathered congregation may bless them.
However, some Muslim brides and grooms do choose to also
exchange vows. Here is a common (quite traditional) recitation:
Bride: "I, ______, offer you myself in marriage and in accordance with
the instructions of the Holy Koran and the Holy Prophet, peace and
blessing be upon him. I pledge, in honesty and with sincerity, to be
for you an obedient and faithful wife."
Groom: "I pledge, in honesty and sincerity, to be for you a faithful
and helpful husband."

Islamic view on courtship

Courtship is unacceptable and forbidden in Islam.Dating as it currently practiced in
much of the world today is not supposed to exist among muslim. Young muslim
men and women are not supposed to enter into one on one intimate relationship,
spending time alone together "getting to know each other" in a very deep way before
deciding whether that's the person they will marry............

Courtship in Islam
"Dating" as it is currently practiced in much of the world does not exist among Muslims -where a young man and woman (or boy/girl) are in a one-on-one intimate relationship,
spending time together alone, "getting to know each other" in a very deep way before
deciding whether that's the person they will marry. Rather, in Islam pre-marital relationships
of any kind between members of the opposite sex is forbidden.
The choice of a marriage partner is one of the most important decisions a person will make
in his or her lifetime. It should not be taken lightly, nor left to chance or hormones. It
should be taken as seriously as any other major decision in life - with prayer, careful
investigation, and family involvement.

So in today's world, how do young people manage? First of all, Muslim youth develop very
close friendships with their same-sex peers. This "sisterhood" or "brotherhood" that
develops when they are young continues throughout their lives. When a young person
decides to get married, the following steps often take place:

Young person makes du'a for Allah to help him or her find the right person

The family enquires, discusses, and suggests candidates. They consult with each
other to narrow down potential prospects. Usually the father or mother approaches
the other family to suggest a meeting.

Couple agrees to meet in chaperoned, group environment. Umar related that the
Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him) said, "Not one of you should meet a
woman alone unless she is accompanied by a relative (mahram)" (Bukhari/Muslim).
The Prophet (peace be upon him) also reportedly said, "Whenever a man is alone
with a woman, Satan (Shaytan) is the third among them" (Tirmidhi). When young
people are getting to know each other, being alone together is a temptation toward
wrongdoing. At all times, Muslims should follow the commands of the Qur'an (24:3031) to "lower their gaze and guard their modesty...." Islam recognizes that we
are human and are given to human weakness, so this rule provides safeguards for
our own sake.

Family investigates candidate further - talking with friends, family, Islamic leaders,
co-workers, etc. to learn about his or her character.

Couple prays salat-l-istikhara (prayer for guidance) to seek Allah's help in making a
decision.

Couple agrees to pursue marriage or part ways. Islam has given this freedom of
choice to both young men and women - they cannot be forced into a marriage that
they don't want.

This type of focused courtship helps ensure the strength of the marriage, by drawing upon
family elders' wisdom and guidance in this important life decision. Family involvement in the
choice of a marriage partner helps assure that the choice is based not on romantic notions,
but rather on a careful, objective evaluation of the compatibility of the couple. That is why
these marriages often prove successful.

Rather, in Islam pre-marital relationships of any kind between members of the opposite sex is
forbidden.