LM TH NO PHT TRIN SC

THU HT TNH CM V TNH DC

TRC NGI T T VI BN
Chng ta khng th cng p am m (tnh cm, tnh dc) ca chng ta. Hu ht chng ta bit rng
iu rt kh.
Nhng c mt iu m hu ht chng ta cha tng c hc: D s quyn r gii tnh khng th
kim sot c th chng vn c th c rn luyn. Bi vit ny s hng dn mt s cch
trau di s quyn r tnh cm v tnh dc trc ngi t t, bit tn trng v sn sng v tnh cm.
Ngay c nu bn thng xuyn b thu ht trc nhng c gi h hoc trai h, hoc trc nhng
ngi khng sn sng v tnh cm, th bn vn c th pht trin kh nng ny!
Ph quyn r
Mi ln chng ta bc vo mt cn phng c nhiu ngi, chng ta a ra nhng s la chn: Ai
l ngi chng ta ch ? Chng ta b qua nhng ngi no? Deb, mt ngi chi chng khon
Chicago tng k vi ti N gn nh mt php mu. Ti c th i d mt ba tic, v lc no cng
c mt ngi m ti b thu ht nht trc h. Nu ti hn h vi anh y, ch trong vi tun hoc vi
thng ti khm ph ra anh y c nhng phm cht tm l tng t nh ngi yu trc y ca
ti. Nhng khi ti ln u tin gp anh y, ti khng bit iu ny s l s tht!
Khi chng ta ln u tin gp mt ai , tm hn v tri tim ca chng ta bt u mt cuc phn tch
phc tp, chn ra nhng manh mi nh cu trc khun mt v c th, v cng ch n nhiu du
hiu tinh t khc nh ngn ng c th, s biu l trn khun mt, ng nt ca mi, sc thi ca
ging ni v nhng c quanh i mt. Chng ta lin tc x l tt c nhng thng tin ny m thm
ch khng bit iu . Tt c nhng g chng ta cm nhn l s ham mun hoc thiu ham
mun. Cc nh khoa hc ni vi chng ta rng mt con tm c th nh hi mt con tm khc gii
khc cch 6.5 miles. D bn nng kt i ca chng ta khng pht trin mnh nh loi tm th t
nhin ban cho mt s nhy cm sc bn trong rada tnh yu ca chng ta, c lp trnh tm
thy ngi ph hp kch hot mch cm xc ca chng ta. Tt c chng ta u b thu ht trc
mt kiu ngi no lm chng ta ng tim: mt kiu ngoi hnh, mt kiu cm xc, v mt kiu
tnh cch.

Gi s c mt ph quyn r, t 1 n 10, v ngi mc thp nht ca ph

(nh s 1 v 2) l ngi khng c sc quyn r (v tnh yu hoc tnh dc) vi
chng ta cht no. Nhng nhng ngi mc cao nht ca ph (s 10): h rt
hp dn, h lm chng ta ng tim (chng ta c mt cm xc mnh m), v
h gy ra c nhng khao kht v nhng ni bt an ca chng ta. Harville
Hendrix, ngi sng lp Imago Therapy, ng dy rngnhng ngi rt
quyn r vi chng ta mt phn v h hin thn cho khng ch
nhng phm cht tm l tt nht m cn xu nht ca b m chng
ta!
D chng ta l nhng ngi trng thnh, th tt c chng ta u c
nhng tn thng t thi th u cha c x l do s bo hnh, tc gin hoc

phn bi. Trong v thc, chng ta tm kim s cha lnh thng qua ngi yu
ca chng ta. V chng ta c gng t c s cha lnh ny bng cch gn
b vi mt ngi no m chng ta cm nhn rng h c th lm tn
thng chng ta theo cch tng t vi nhng cch m chng ta tng b tn
thng khi cn b, vi hy vng rng chng ta c th thuyt phc anh/c y
cui cng s yu thng v chp nhn chng ta.
Ci ti thc ca chng ta b thu ht trc nhng phm cht tch cc m chng ta mong c,
nhng ci v thc ca chng ta li ko chng ta n nhng phm cht nhc chng ta rng chng ta
tng b lm tn thng nht nh th no.
iu ny gii thch phn no l do ti sao chng ta tr nn rt ngng ngu v bt an khi cnh
ngi chng ta b th ht mnh lit trc h.
N cng gii thch ti sao nhng v tht tnh ln nht ca chng ta thng xut hin cng vi
nhng s thu ht mnh lit . Mt s ngi phn ng trc nhng ln tht tnh trong qu kh
bng cch ch hn h vi nhng ngi mc thp nht ca ph quyn r. Chng ta s nguy c
mt mt khi chng ta i mt vi ngi mc cao nht ca ph quyn r. Chng ta thng cm
thy an ton nht vi ngi khng nhiu c sc quyn r (v tnh yu hoc tnh dc) vi chng ta.
Nhng khuyt im l nhng mi quan h ny thng nhm chn, gy tht vng v thiu am m.
Nhiu ngi khc th ch hn h vi ngi mc cao nht ca ph, v h tin rng l ni c mt
tnh yu ch thc v am m. Vi mt ai c mt s im cao trn ph quyn r ca bn th bn
c th ni rng bn b thu ht trc h rt nhanh. D iu ny c th rt phn khch th n him khi
em li s thoi mi hoc an ton.

Theo kinh nghim ca ti, nhng ngi ch hn h vi ngi mc

cao ca ph th c nhiu kh nng vn c thn.
Ngc li, b thu ht trc ngi nm mc gia ca ph quyn r th him khi xy ra ngay lp
tc. N thng cn nhiu thi gian hn bit c chng ta thc s thch h nh th no.
Nhng ngi sn sng hn h vi ngi mc gia ca ph th c nhiu kh nng tm thy
tnh yu ch thc v ko di. N khng phi l vn ca s h gi, m v s quyn r ngay tc
th khng phi l yu t d bo tt nht ca s am m trong tng lai. Sc thu ht mnh lit lm
chng ta m qung trc nhng phm cht thc t ca mi tng tc ca chng ta vi ngi khc,
v lm chng ta khng nhn thy c nhng tnh cch ca ngi chng ta hn h. Sc quyn r
c th ln thm.
Nhiu ngi trong chng ta tng c kinh nghim v vic tr nn ngy cng b thu ht trc mt ai
khi chng ta hiu anh/c y tt hn.
Vy, chng ta nn lm g khi gp mt ai gy cm tnh vi chng ta v chng ta cm thy hi b
thu ht trc h, nhng cha yu h?
Sc quyn r gii tnh c th thay i c nhiu hn chng ta ngh. Tt c chng ta u c nhng
mu ngi c th khin chng ta rt phn khch ngay lp tc. Nhng nh ti ni, sc quyn r
c th ln thm. Bn c th hoi nghi rng bn s tr nn b thu ht trc mt ngi hon ton
khng quyn r (v ngoi hnh) vi bn. Nhng nu mt ai khin bn cm thy hi b thu ht, v
h c nhng phm cht khc m bn yu thch, th s th ht ca bn c th pht trin. Nu bn
gp mt ai ln u tin th ng vi a ra quyt nh nhanh chng da trn vic bn c ngay
lp tc b thu ht trc h mc ngoi hnh khng. Nu bn khng chc chn, hy tip tc hn

h. Theo thi gian, mt iu ng yu c th xy ra: Anh/c y c th tr nn p hn trong mt

bn. V nu khng, bn s bit rng l lc dng hn h vi h.
Nu bn tng xem cc ha s v mt bc tranh, bn s thy h thng v phc tho. Phc tho
gip h tp trung vo im chnh yu ca i tng ca h m khng b sao lng bi nhng ng
nt th rp ca n. Chng ta cn lm iu tng t trong hn h. Chng ta rt d dng b thu ht
vo vic nh gi nhng im khng hon ho ca con ngi, nhng n c li cho chng ta hn
khi cm nhn tm hn ca h. l ci lm cho s quyn r ln thm.
Khi chng ta bt u quan tm su sc hn n mt ai th nhng th g v hnh bt u pht
trin trong suy ngh ca chng ta, trong nhng hnh nh v khao kht tnh dc ca chng ta. Tm
hn ca chng ta, bn nng tnh dc v tri tim ca chng ta bt u to ra s gn b vi ngi ,
lm anh/c y l ca ring chng ta.
Khi chng ta tp c bp thng qua cc bi tp, c th chng ta to ra nhng mao mch mi nui
dng c bp . Khi chng ta to ra tnh yu mi th mt th g tng t xut hin. Nhng con
ng mn thn kinh mi, con ng cm xc, nhng l thi mi, nhng k c v nhu cu c
to ra. Mt mng li nhng kt ni mi c to ra, khi tri tim ca chng ta cho php ngi-tng
xa l ny tr thnh ngi yu ca chng ta.
xy dng s quyn r th cn c thi gian. V th m nhiu ngi c th mun tm kim mt th
g r rng hn. Kt qu l nhiu mi quan h tuyt vi tim nng kt thc t ngt trc khi n
c cho mt c hi.
Chng ta cng tp trung vo nhng th gy ra s khao kht ca chng ta th nim am m ca
chng ta cng c xy dng.
Nu bn hi b thu ht trc mt ai c bit, v nu bn mun lm cho s thu ht ln thm,
hy bt u bng cch cho bn thn bn khng gian. Bt k ngi tuyt vi nh th no, bn
ng p buc bn thn phi tr nn b thu ht nhiu hn trc anh/c y. p buc nhng cm xc
ca bn s ch lm chn dng chy t nhin ca s quyn r. Thay vo , hy cho php bn thn
bn suy ngm v iu g lm bn b thu ht trc h; iu g lm bn phn khch v nh gi cao.
B phn no ca c th h li cun bn? Bn s thch lm g vi nhng b phn c th ? Hy
dnh thi gian cho nhng hnh nh tng tng ca bn m ra. Bn c th mun nm tay h
rp phim. Hoc hn, s m v vut ve mt b phn ca c th ca h hoc c h lm iu
tng t vi bn. Tn trng bt k hnh nh tng tng no ca bn. l cch chng ta c th
lm cho am m ca chng ta ln ln.
Ti cng s khuyn khng nn quan h tnh dc t nht l sau 5 hoc 6 cuc hn u tin. Khi
chng ta khao kht mt ai v sau tr hon tnh dc, th nhng con ng mn thn kinh mi
ca s quyn r hnh thnh. N l mt cch tuyt vi pht trin am m. Hy tin hnh chm
chm bn ngoi, nhng cho php bn thn bn t do tng tng trong u!
V nu ham mun ca bn thin v cm gic nhiu hn tnh dc th n cng tt. Mt thn ch ca
ti gp mt ngi n ng sng chu u. C bit mnh thch anh nhng c khng b quyn r
mun c quan h tnh dc. C ch mun m p. Anh mi c n thm nhng c khng chc
liu c nn i Ti khng bit mnh c nn n chu u ch m p mt ai . Ngi bn thng
thi ca c p Tht khng? Mnh khng th ngh ra mt l do tt hn i chu u! Thn ch ca
ti quyt nh i v theo thi gian h yu nhau su sc. C y thng minh khi dnh thi gian
c y cn, v anh y thng minh v cho c y thi gian c mun.

CHNG TRAI T T HAY L G TRAI

H: PH N MUN G?
Trc y ti tho lun v s nhm ln xung quanh nhng g ph n mun v s khng tho
mn m h i mt trong vic hn h thi hin i. Ti gii thch lm th no iu ny to ra mt
tnh hung khng ai thng cho c n ng. Cui cng, n khin mi ngi cm thy s hi v
khng mun hn h. S nhm ln dn n nhng quan im nh nhng chng trai t t cui cng
s tht bi, hoc nm trong vng tnh bn, v nhng kh khn vi tnh bn nam/n.
ng sau s nhm ln ny l nhng thng ip ln ln c gi i trong x hi hin i. C n
ng v ph n u khng chc chn v nhng g ph n mun. C phi ph n mun chng trai t
t i x tt vi ph n v quan tm n nhng nhu cu ca c y? Hoc, c phi ph n mun
mt g trai h nam tnh, quyn r, v lm cho tri tim nng y lon nhp?
Ph n mun g?
Nhng s thch v bn tnh ca ph n, c khm ph bi Buss v Shackelford (2008). H a
cho nhng ngi kt hn cc bng hi nh gi v gi tr ca ring h nh mt bn tnh v
nhng s thch ca h v mt bn tnh. Cc kt qu ch ra nhng ph n trong nghin cu khao
kht ngi n ng c 4 phm cht sau:

Gen tt n ng nam tnh, ngoi hnh quyn r, p trai, kho mnh v

sc hp dn gii tnh cao.
Kh nng u t tt n ng vi thu nhp tim nng cao, kh nng kim
tin tt, c trnh hc vn v ln tui hn ngi ph n.
Kh nng lm cha tt n ng mun c mt gia nh v con ci, yu tr
con v thch chng, mun nui chng tht tt v trng thnh, n nh v
mt cm xc.
Ngi bn i tt n ng mun tr thnh mt ngi bn i yu thung.
Buss v Shackelford (2008) cng pht hin thy nhng mi tng quan quan trng gia s quyn
r v ngoi hnh ca ngi ph n v cc mc m h k vng v ngi bn i n ng mi
phm cht. Ni cch khc, h pht hin thy nhng ph n quyn r mun c tt c. Ngc
li, nhng ph n km quyn r c xu hng h thp nhng k vng ca h tt c cc phm cht
trn.
Ph thuc vo hon cnh, cc tc gi a ra gi thit rng mt s ph n s s dng mt chin
lc hn h pha trn. Thay v an phn vi nhng phm cht km l tng mt ngi n ng,
nhng ph n s hn h vi nhiu hn mt ngi n ng, pha trn-v-kt hp (mix-andmatch) nhng phm cht tt nht . Thng th iu ny s bao gm vic quan h tnh dc trong
ngn hn (lm m n thn, la di, cm sng) ly c gen tt t mt ngi n ng nam
tnh v kho mnh, trong khi tm kim s u t v kh nng lm cha t ngi n ng khc c
nhng ngun lc tt. Mt s sp xp nh vy s c nhiu kh nng xy ra khi, 1) ngi ph n c
gi tr thp v khng th tm c mt ngi n ng c tt c 4 phm cht , v 2) hon cnh
ca c ta cho php c thc hin chin lc mix-and-match m khng b trng pht hoc gp tr
ngi.

Do , ph n dng nh mun c chng trai t t v g trai h. Theo l tng, h mun c tt c

nhng phm cht trn mt ngi n ng. Nu h khng th tm thy mt ngi n ng t
c tt c nhng phm cht , hoc h khng c mt gi tr bn tnh cao kim c ngi
n ng , tuy nhin, h c th an phn vi ngi n ng km l tng, hoc pha trn-v-kt
hp gia hai kiu n ng.
Thay i nhng mong mun theo thi gian
Nghin cu thm bi Tifferet v Kruger (2010) cho rng mong mun ca ph n mt ngi bn
i c th thay i theo thi gian. Cc nh nghin cu kho st 1,365 ph n t 11 quc gia,
tui t 14 n 68, v nhng s thch ca h v mt ngi bn i nam. C th, nhng ph n
c yu cu nh gi h c kh nng c mt mi quan h ngn hn, di hn v tnh mt m nh
th no vi nhng miu t v mt kiu n ng ngi cha anh hng v k v li xu xa.
Cc kt qu ca h ch ra ph n nhn chung thch kiu n ng lm cha khi h cn mt bn i
lu di v kiu n ng v li cho mt cuc tnh ngn hn. Tuy nhin, so vi nhng ph n tr
hn, th ph n ln tui hn c xu hng thch kiu n ng lm cha. Ngc li, nhng ph n
tr c nhiu kh nng quan tm n nhng cuc tnh ngn, c bit l vi nhng g v li.
Cc tc gi cho rng nh hng ny c th l do s thay i trong kh nng sinh sn. Nhng ph
n tr hn c th hng th hn vi vic chim c nhng gen tt t nhng ngi n ng
quyn r, ngay c nu iu c ngha l mt cuc ngoi tnh trong ngn hn. Ngc li, nhng
ph n ln tui hn c th thay i s tp trung khi tnh dc v mang thai, hng n vic tm
kim nhng ngun lc tt v s d phng cho bn thn c v nhng a con ca c.
Khng ngc nhin khi mi ngi cm thy bi ri v vic ph n mun g (thm ch bn thn ph
n)! V c bn, ph n mun c tt c mt ngi n ng quyn r, nam tnh, bit quan tm
chm sc, c nhng ngun lc chia s, v s chm sc con ci. Do nhng khc bit v thi
gian, nhng s thch cho hn h ngn hn hoc di hn, gi tr ca ring ngi ph n, v/hoc s
lng n ng c sn, ph n thng kt thc l tho hip hip nhng phm cht . Nhng ph
n khc th pha trn-v-kt hp vi nhiu hn mt anh chng. Do , nhng iu ph n mun
kt cuc l trng ging nh mt mc tiu hay thay i, di chuyn v ri rm ph thuc vo nhng
kiu ph n m bn hi v nhng nhu cu c nhn ca h ti thi im .
May mn l, c hy vng lm s vic sng t cho c n ng v ph n
i vi ph n. Bn c th khng nhn ra n lc ny, nhng bn c nhiu kh nng mun c tt c
nhng phm cht trn mt ngi n ng. T nghin cu, bn s c nhiu kh nng thch mt
ngi n ng c tt c nhng phm cht , nu c th (hn l pha trn). Tuy nhin, nu bn cn
tr v ang c thn by gi, bn c th b li cun bi nhng g v li quyn r cho mt cuc tnh
mt m ngn hn. Nu bn ln tui hn v c con, th khi nhng ngi n ng lm cha
ng tin cy c th thu ht bn nhiu hn cho mt mi quan h cam kt.
Tuy nhin, nu bn c ng lc v kh nng, bn c th ti a ho hnh phc v lu di ca bn
bng cch trc tin pht trin ngoi hnh, tnh cch, v sc quyn r gii tnh ca bn. Sau ,
nh gi cn thn nhng iu bn mun mt ngi n ng, chn mt ngi bn trai tt v c
mt mi quan h tho mn. iu ny s gip bn tm thy mt ngi n ng c nhng phm cht
tt nht m bn c th kim c.
Mt khc, b nhng g v li quyn r lm tan nt tri tim bn v sau c gng tm kim s cam
kt t nhng ngi n ng lm cha ln tui v thn trng hn, c th l mt qu trnh kh khn.
Tt nhin, tr khi bn ch mun duy nht tnh dc hoc mi quan h bu bn trong sut qung i
cn li ca bn. Trong trng hp y, ch cn chn mt kiu n ng duy nht v tn hng!
i vi n ng. Mt ln na, ph n mun c tt c. H khao kht mt ngi n ng c v ngoi
p, nam tnh, tnh cch nng m v nhng ti nng v ngun lc v song. Tt nhin, iu

khng th t c vi tt c n ng. Tuy nhin, iu tt nht tip theo l s cn bng. Ni cch

khc, ph n s thch mt anh chng c mt cht cho mi phm cht trn (vd, anh y c tin mt
cht, p trai mt cht, t t mt cht), hn l nhng anh chng ch c mt phm cht cao v khng
c nhng phm cht khc. (Vd, mt anh c nhiu tin nhng xu v khng t t hoc mt anh p
trai nhng khng c tin v khng t t, hoc mt anh t t nhng khng p trai v khng c tin)
T , nu bn c mt s nghip thnh cng, th bn tt hn l nn dnh thm thi gian i tp
gym. Nu bn c c th kho mnh, th khi hy ci thin tnh cch v sc hp dn ca bn.
Ngoi l duy nht cho nguyn tc ny l, nu bn ch mun tnh dc trong ngn hn th khi
hy ti a ho ngoi hnh ca bn, s nam tnh v sc hp dn gii tnh. Nhng anh chng c mt
cht cn bng dng nh c c nhng mi quan h di hn tho mn nht.
Trong bt k trng hp no, hy nh xc nh nhng g bn mun c li, tm mt c bn gi c th
p ng c nhng nhu cu , v c c nhng th lm bn tho mn.
Kt lun:
Ph n mun g? H mun tt c gen tt, s u t, kh nng lm cha, v tnh yu. Theo l
tng, h mun c tt c nhng iu mt chng trai. Do , chin lc tt nht l xc nh
kiu bn i m bn mun thu ht v c gng iu chnh bn thn bn cho ph hp vi nhng khao
kht c th ca h. i vi a s, iu s l mt ph n quyn r tm kim mt ngi n ng
cn bng, cho mt mi quan h di hn v tho mn. i vi nhng ph n khc, n s l mt s
thng lng kh khn hn gia nhng kiu n ng lm cha v nhng g v li, t c
nhng mc tiu tnh dc ngn hn v nhng nhu cu u t di hn. Tht khng may, mt chin
lc nh vy thng khng lm tho mn v c li cho c hai bn.

V
TR MN TRN KHUN MT NI LN IU G ?
HY TM HIU BIT NGUYN NHN THC S L G ?
1. Trn
Mn trn trn l do bn tiu ho km do cht c v iu quan trng l bn ang thiu
nc. Bc s Shapiro cho bit: "Gii php dnh cho bn l ung nc gip c th thi
ra nhng c t. Ung nc trong sut c ngy v trnh nc c ga hay ung c
caffein. Ngoi ra, mt cc ln nc tr xanh c th hu ch, v n c cha cc cht
chng oxy ha lm trung ha cc c t".
2. Vng ch T
Mi ca bn c lin kt vi gan (ngi nghin ru v nhng ngi c tn thng gan
do cc nguyn nhn nh ung th i khi s c mt ci mi ), do mn trng c y
c kh nng biu hin ri lon chc nng gan.

3. Quanh mt
Vng da quanh mt th hin tnh trng sc khe ca thn. Qung thm mt c th l
du hiu cho thy thn h hoc c th thiu nc- Tin s Shapiro ni.
4. G m
Phn trn ca m c lin kt n phi. Khi chng ta ht khng kh nhim c th dn
n mn v tr ny. Bn ngoi, mc d vi khun trn b mt ca in thoi di ng
hoc gi ng ca bn cng l nhng th phm gy ra mn y.
5. Phn m di
Mn v tr ny c th do v sinh rng ming km. "Vn trong ming, c bit l
nhng ngi lin quan nu rng, s khin ni mn y", Shapiro ni. Thng xuyn
nh rng, dng ch nha khoa v trnh thc n ngt v ung ngt s ci thin v
sinh rng ming v mn y.
6. Mi
Mi ca bn cng c lin kt vi tri tim ca bn. "Nhng biu hin nh sng hoc
thay i hnh c hnh ca mi biu hin ca huyt p cao," theo Tin s Shapiro.
khc phc iu ny, thay i ch n ung l quan trng. Trnh cc thc ung t
nng lng, gim lng mui n v n nhiu tri cy v rau thc y sc khe tim
mch v huyt p thp.
7. Tai
Tai cng lin quan n sc kho ca thn. Vic mn xut hin y c th l du hiu
ca vic mt nc. Hy chc chn ung nhiu nc hn trong sut c ngy, v trnh
tiu th mui d tha.
8. Cm
Cm lin kt vi rut non. Mt ln na, thay i ch n ung c th lm cho mt s
khc bit rt ln. "Bn nn trnh cc sn phm t sa v cc ba n nhiu du m,"
Shapiro ni. Nhng thi quen n ung lnh mnh, c bit l bao gm nhiu tri cy v
rau qu, gi cho tiu ha hot ng trn tru s gip trnh khi cc vn v mn.

Chuyn du ngon n hn o ca nhng thin thn Hy Lp

c mnh danh l hn o ca nhng thin thn Hy Lp, Santorini cn c v nh mt
phn ca thin ng, ni c nh Oia ngm hong hn p nht th gii.
Santorini l mt hn o nm trn bin Aegean cch 200 km v pha ng nam ca Hy Lp, s hu
v p ta nh tin cnh chn trn gian. Bt k ai khi bit n Santoniri u khng khi ngy ngt
trc s quyn r cht ngi ca n.

Du lch y khng qu t nhng kh phc tp trong vn di chuyn. Hng ngy c cc

chuyn bay thng t Rome hoc Venice n y, ngoi ra l cc chuyn bay hng tun t cc

thnh ph ln khc. T Vit Nam, cung ng p l n Php trc ri qua Venice Santorini
Rome, va tin li v tit kim. Ln l trnh v t v my bay trc t nht 15 ngy th s r, ch
khong 100 euro mt chng. Nu t st qu, bn c th phi tr n 300-500 euro cho tng
chng.

NN I SANTORINI VO THI IM NO?

Ma cao im nht ca du lch Santorini l thng 7 v 8. Nng chi chang, tri xanh ngt khng mt
gn my, tuy nhin dch v t v rt ng khch du lch. Nu thch yn bnh v vng v, bn
nn chn thng 6 hoc thng 9,10, thi tit s mt m hn, khng qu nng v chi ph du lch trong

thi im ny cng s r hn. Bn ch nn i Santorini vo cc thng khc v tri lnh, xm xt v

mi dch v ti o lc s tm ngng, nhn rt hoang tn vng v.

DI CHUYN TRN O

T sn bay s c cc chuyn xe bus i Fira hng ngy. V mua trc tip trn xe kh r, khong 1,5
euro mt lt. Ngoi ra s c cc dng xe minibus kiu 16 ch mi ghp khch. i cng nhiu
ngi cng r, trung bnh khong 35 euro 2-4 ngi. Gi taxi cng tng ng hoc t hn
nhng khng ch c nhiu v ngi. Hoc bn c th chn thu t ring v t li, tin li,
tit kim hn v i li nhiu. Nhng th tc cng kh lng nhng v nhng yu cu v bng li v
ngoi ng.

N CHI TI SANTORINI?

C hai a im chnh cn phi i Santorini. Lng Fira l th ph nm gia o, rt sm ut vi

ch m, cc khu n chi, bar, sn nhy, nh hng C mt s qun ru v nh hng p nm
trn con ng chnh ca Fira vi tm nhn rng ln ra ton cnh vnh Aegea. Nn n sm hoc
t ch trc c v tr p lc hong hn bung xung. Ngoi ra, ngay on trung tm Fira tn
Classico c mt nh hng n rt ngon vi view p.

 n ngon, nhn vin phc v thn thin, mt con tm hm nng phomai c gi 80 euro, cng
thm hi sn v bia ru ht khong 200 euro cho 4 ngi. Mc gi ny kh hp l cho mt ba n
hi sn ngon ming gia trung tm sm ut Hy Lp.

Khu ph m thc Fira c nhiu qun x vi n nhanh thng dng nh Mc Donal, Pizza hay
Kepub... Chi ph trn o ny khng qu t . Nh gh tim kem Chill Box n loi kem v sa
chua trn trong hp giy ni ting ti y.

Fira l ni tp trung bun bn sm ut nht ca o. Tuy nhin c la chn ngh dng cng
nh ngm cnh nhiu nht li l lng Oia. Mt ngi lng nm cui o, ni c bnh chn l im
ngm hong hn p nht trn th gii. Kinh nghim chia s cho cc bn l hy chia thi gian ra
th hai ni tri nghim.

Ngoi ra c mt s lng khc nh Imerovigli, Messaria, Kamari l lng ven bin di chn ni n
hi sn kh r. Pyrgos l lng c bi tm vi ct en v en, bn c th t khm ph thm nu
thch pht v c d thi gian y. Tuy nhin, Fira v Oia hu nh cho bn.

C mt s bi bin nh Red Beach, White Beach hay Black Beach bn cng nn gh th, nht l
Red Beach bi n c hnh thnh t bazan ni la rt xp v xp lp, nhn cc vn ca
n s thy v hng v, m cht ca chu u. Black Beach mi nhn s thy tht vng bi khng c
ct m thay vo ton si mu en, mt loi s hnh thnh do ni la phun tro. Tuy nhin
nc bin trong vt v sch p.

1. Khng ai khn ln ma cha tng trai qua ni au

i khi cuc sng ng mt canh ca li v la luc cho bn tin v pha trc. Gp kh khn
khng c ngha la bn ang tht bi. Hy nh rng ni au c hai loi: loi lam bn tn thng va
loi khin bn thay i. Thay v khang c hai loi ni au nay, hy chp nhn chung v chung u
khin bn trng thanh hn.
2. Tt ca mi th trong cuc sng chi la tm thi
Tri ma ri cung se tnh. Vt thng ri cung se c cha lanh. Sau man m tm ti la anh
sang cua bui bnh minh. Khng c g ko dai mi mi ca. Mi khoanh khc u mang li cho bn
mt khi u mi va mt kt thuc mi. Mi giy tri qua bn li c mt c hi mi. Bn chi cn nm
bt c hi va tn dng n.
3. Lo lng va phan nan cung khng thay i c g
Nhng ngi hay phan nan la nhng ngi t c vic nht. Bn c danh ca ngay hm nay than
vn v ngay hm qua th ngay mai cua bn cung khng khi sc c. Thay vao hy bt tay
hanh ng.
4. Vt so cua bn la biu tng cua sc mnh
Mt vt so c ngha la mt ni au qua i va vt thng lanh. N c ngha la bn chinh phc
ni au, hc c mt bai hc, ln mnh hn, va tin v pha trc. Hy bt u xem nhng vt
so cua bn nh la mt du hiu cua sc mnh ch khng phai la du vt cua nhng ni au.
5. Cuc i la mt chui nhng cuc u tranh
Kin nhn khng phai la ch i ma la kha nng duy tr mt thai tch cc trong khi theo ui gic
m. Bn c th mt i s n nh va thoai mai trong mt thi gian dai, thm ch la n khng ngon,
ngu khng yn . Bn c th phai hy sinh cac mi quan h va tt ca nhng g thn thuc. i khi bn
phai chp nhn s ch giu t ngi khac. Nhng ri bn se nhn ra rng con ng cua bn c
xy dng nn t nhng cuc u tranh vi nhng iu nh nht nht.
6. Bn khng cn phai tm n s tiu cc cua ngi khac
Khi xung quanh bn tran ngp s tiu cc, th bn hy t ra tch cc. Mim ci khi ai c tnh dm
bn xung. Hy lun la chnh mnh d ai i x vi bn ti t. ng bao gi cho s cay nghit

cua ngi khac thay i con ngi bn. Ngi ta vn se x xm v bn cho d bn lam tt nh
th nao. V vy, hy ngh v ban thn trc khi ngh v nhng g ang din ra trong u ngi khac.
Hy lam nhng g khin bn hnh phuc va bn cnh bt c ai lam cho bn thng xuyn mim
ci.
7. Chuyn g cn n se n
Hy tn hng cuc sng ang m ra trc mt bn. Bn c th khng n c ni ma bn mun,
nhng cui cng bn se chc chn n c ni ma bn cn.
8. iu tt nht bn c th lam la tip tc bc i
ng ngn ngi nhn s giup t ai . ng ngn ngi yu thm mt ln na. Hy tm thy ng
lc ci mi ngay va lam cho ngi khac mim ci theo. Hy nh rng bn khng cn nhiu
ngi trong cuc sng, ma chi cn mt vai ngi tht s quan trng vi bn ma thi. Chp nhn khi

bn sai va hc hi t n. Lun lun nhn li va xem bn trng thanh c bao nhiu, va t hao

v chnh mnh.

LM CH CM GIC KH CHU
Cha Kha Khng Mc Kt Trong Vng Thoi Mi
Trong tt c nhng k nng ti hc c sut 7 nm thay i cuc i, ni bt nht chnh l:
Bit chp nhn cm gic kh chu.
Nu hc c k nng ny, bn c th lm ch gn nh mi th. Bn c th nh bi s tr hon,
bt u tp th dc, n ung lnh mnh hn, hc mt ngoi ng mi, vt qua cc th thch cng
nh nhng s kin khin bn mt nhoi, khm ph nhng iu mi l, pht biu trn sn khu, v
tr thnh mt ngi theo ch ngha ti gin. V ch l mi l s khi u.
Tht khng may, hu ht mi ngi li n trnh cm gic kh chu. H tht s c gng n trnh n
ngay t khi nhn thy du hiu u tin ca s kh chu, h lin b chy nhanh ht mc c th.
C l vi hu ht mi ngi, y l yu t hn ch ln nht v cng l l do ti sao bn khng th
thay i thi quen.
Hy ngh th ny: nhiu ngi khng n rau v h khng thch v ca n. khng phi mt ni au
cng cc, cng chng phi kiu tra tn nh nh t Guantanamo, m ch l mt v m bn khng
quen. V do h n nhng g h thch, nh ko, mn chin, tht, ph mai, nhng mn mn v
cha nhiu bt tinh ch.
Cui cng, vic tm n nhng th cho ta cm gic d chu s nh hng n sc khe ca ta v
khin ta b tha cn.
Ti hiu iu , v ti tng l mt ngi nh vy trong thi gian rt di. Ti pht ph, ngi l mt
ch, ht thuc, n ngp u, sng ba bn v tr hon, bi v ti khng thch nhng iu khng
thoi mi. V v th, hu qu l ti khin cho cuc sng ca mnh v cng ti t.
iu tuyt vi l: Ti nhn ra i cht kh chu cng khng qu t. Trn thc t, nu luyn tp mt
cht th bn c th chp nhn cm gic . Khi ng ra iu ny, ti c th thay i tt c mi th,
v gi y ti vn lm tt vic nh vo k nng chp nhn s kh chu.
ng v mt cht kh chu m b l iu bn mun.

N TRNH CM GIC KH CHU

Khi cng thng, ngi ta thng ht thuc, n, i mua sm, ung ru bia, s dng ma ty, bt
c th g c th gip h thot khi cm gic kh chu t nhng vn ang to p lc cho h. Th
nhng, nu quan st s cng thng k hn, ta thy chnh ni s v cn c l nguyn nhn gy ra
cng thng (thng l ni lo s rng mnh cha gii), v nu ta xem xt v chu nhn nhn n,
ni s y s dn bin mt.
Lc mi bt u tp th dc sau khi ngi mt ch qu lu, ngi ta cm thy khng thoi mi. Tht
kh khn! Bn c th b au nhc khp ngi. Tp th dc chng d dng nh ngi mt ch. Bn
khng quen tp th dc, v bn s mnh s lm sai hoc trng nh mt tn ngc. Th l sau mt
thi gian, bn ngng tp vkh chu; trong khi trn thc t, cm gic kh chu i cht y chng c
g l khng khip. N u phi mt ni au cng cc, ch l mt cht khng thoi mi thi, ng
khng no?
Khi th n ung lnh mnh hn, ngi ta thng khng thch ch n n rau, qu hch ti,
ht lanh, tri cy v u h, u tng ln men hay u en th lm sao sung sng bng n
nhng mn chin xo, nhiu cht bo, mn mn hay ngn ngt c ch. l mt dng kh chu khi
bn thay i khu v, nhng thc t, ch cn vt qua cm gic khng thoi mi ny, bn c th d
dng n ung lnh mnh hn.

Cm gic kh chu khng h t. Ch l ta khng quen vi n. V v th ta n trnh n, nhng ta phi

tr gi bng vic khng th thay i c g, khng th khe mnh, khng th ci m cho n
nhng cuc phiu lu v s hn n ca cuc sng ny.

LM CH CM GIC KH CHU
lm ch s kh chu, hy chp nhn n. Nu bn e s cm gic khng thoi mi v bn c gng
nh bi n bng mt hnh ng v cng mt mi, chc chn cui cng bn s b cuc v tht bi,
v li tm kim s thoi mi.
Do hy thc hin tng bc nh.
1. Chn mt vic khng qu kh
Ly v d nh thin. Vic ny khng qu kh bn ch vic ngi xung v ch tm vo c th cng
nh hi th trong khonh khc hin ti. Bn khng cn c loi b mi suy ngh, khng cn phi
tng nhng cu thn ch kh hiu, thay vo hy ngi xung v ch tm. Nu khng thch thin,
hy th mt loi thc phm b dng xem sao, nh ci xon, ht hnh nhn ti hay ht dim
mch chng hn. Hoc th mt bi th dc tng i d nu bn vn ngi mt ch qu nhiu, v d
nh i b hay chy b.
2. Thc hin tng cht mt
Bn khng cn phi bt u lm iu m mnh cha quen sut 30 pht. Ch mt vi pht thi l .
C t t bt u.
3. Ra khi vng thoi mi ca bn tng cht mt
Mt ngi bn ca ti v cng l thy tu Thin tng, Susan OConnell, c mt bi hng dn thin
c yu thch m bn c th p dng cho bt k hot ng no: khi bn ang thin v cm thy
mun ng dy, ng lm vy; tng t vi ln th hai, v n ln th ba th mi ng ln. Nh
vy bn c th vt qua s thi thc v cm gic kh chu hai ln trc khi u hng ln th ba.
y l mt s cn bng tt, nh bn c th ngoi vng thoi mi ca mnh lu hn mt cht.
Bn cng c th lm iu ny trong khi tp th dc hoc khi thc hin cc hot ng khc c c
gng thm mt cht na.
4. Quan st cm gic kh chu
Hy quan st bn thn khi bn cm thy hi khng thoi mi bn c bt u (thm) phn nn
khng? Bn c tm cch n trnh n khng? Bn tm n iu g? Chuyn g s xy ra nu bn chu
ng n v khng lm g c?
5. Mm ci
y l mt li khuyn ng quan tm. Nu ang cm thy khng thoi mi m bn mm ci, th
qua luyn tp bn c th chp nhn s kh chu. Khi ti tham gia Goruck Challenge (mt hot ng
th thch sc bn) vo nm 2011, l 13 ting ng h v cng kh chu u gi ti try tra v
chy mu, ct trn vo giy khi ti i b ng di v va chy va cng hn 27 kg trn lng. Ti
phi cng ng i v nhng khc g, ht t v lm ng tc cua b cng nh nhng ng tc
khc. Ti mt mi v cng, va i va kht v thm c vo phng tm. Th nhng, ti luyn
tp mt iu rt n gin: ti c gng gi n ci trn mi trong ton b qu trnh kh chu ny.
l mt bi tp quan trng.
Hy luyn tp iu ny mi ngy. Ban u bn s thy khng quen, c th l rt kh, nhng dn
dn vng thoi mi ca bn s c m rng. Nu bn luyn tp v trong nhiu hot ng khc
nhau, vng thoi mi ca bn s m rng chp nhn cm gic kh chu.

Hy quen vi cm gic kh chu, bc khi vng an ton tng cht mt.

BN S LM CH S KH CHU LNH VC NO?

Nu lm ch cm gic kh chu, hy ngh xem khi bn c th lm ch nhng g? Gn nh l tt
c mi th:
1. Tp th dc
Ta khng tp th dc v cm thy khng thoi mi. Nhng nu m rng vng thoi mi ca mnh
tng cht mt, th sau vi ln, ta c th tp th dc mt cch thoi mi.
2. Vit lch
Nu bn mun vit nhng dng nh lun tm cch tr hon, l v vit lch l vic kh hoc
khng thoi mi nh kim tra email hay cc trang mng x hi. Hy chu ng cm gic kh chu,
ri bn s vit c nhiu hn bao gi ht.
3. n ung lnh mnh
Bn s bt ng khi bit rng nu ta dn lm quen vi nhng loi thc phm lnh mnh hn th qua
thi gian, khu v ca chng ta c th thay i nhiu nh th no. iu c ngha l ta phi tri
qua nhng giai on kh chu ngn, nhng nu ta thc hin tng cht mt th s chu ng c
thi.
4. Thin
Ta trnh n cm gic kh chu khi phi ngi im, khng lm g v tp trung vo hin ti. Nhng tht
s khng qu kh u ch hi khng thoi mi mt t thi.
5. Hc ngoi ng/chi nhc c
Bn mun hc iu g mi m ? y th m bn li hay b cuc trc khi thnh tho k nng
mi ny, n gin ch bi v bn khng thoi mi. Hy chu ng cm gic kh chu, v chng my
chc bn s cm thy hng th vi vic hc.
6. S ba bn
Ba bn ch l mt hnh thc khc ca s tr hon. Bn khng sp xp gn gng c, hoc mc
cho nhng mn khng cn thit c tip tc cht ng. L do l v ngay lc ny bn cm thy
khng thoi mi khi phi dn dp nhng th (so vi vic lt web hay xem TV chng hn).
Nhng mt khi vt qua cm gic kh chu th bn s lm c vic chng my kh khn.
7. c sch
Ta c khuynh hng lng trnh vic ngi xung c sch, v ta b cun vo mt vic no thoi
mi hn (mt ln na, lt web chng hn). Nu c th ngi xung c mt cun sch v chu
ng s kh chu, ta c th c c nhiu hn.
8. Nhng cuc phiu lu mi
Nhiu ngi li ni m h cm thy thoi mi, ngha l h b l nhng tri nghim mi m m c
th hi kh chu i vi h. Ngay c khi i du lch, nhiu ngi ch tm n nhng a im du lch
v cc loi thc n quen thuc vi h thay v tm kim nhng tri nghim mi l nhng chn thc
hn vng t mi. Ta trnh tip xc vi ngi l, trnh pht biu trn sn khu hay n nhn ci
mi khng phi cm thy kh chu.

V ch l khi u m thi. Trong tng lnh vc k trn s cn rt nhiu iu bn n lc vt

qua trong tng lai, v vn cn rt nhiu lnh vc khc rng m ch n bn khm ph.
S kh chu c th l chic cha kha hnh phc m ra mi th cho bn.