Pipatsorn Cheewachatchawarn (Mint) 1107

Lost
Theres an apple tree flourishing
with green canopy and two red bright unbruised apples.

I wake up to the unpleasant sound of the alarm clock. Covering my ears with a pillow I sink
into bed.
Argh, shut up. My hand reaches out from under the blanket towards the alarm clock, and
turns it off.
That's better. I adjust myself to the comfiest position. Wait, did I forget something? Then, I
jerk up panicking. Crap, Rin! I rush to the bathroom. What time is it? Will I be late? Totally forgot
that I need to meet Rin today! After a shower, I dress up real quick, and sprint towards the door.
The sun shines brightly above my head. It's a lovely day. Along the sidewalk, the primroses are in full
bloom under the shade of a bur oak tree. Dandelion seeds fly through the air. A cool breeze touches
my skin.
"Perfect day for an outing huh?" I sprint down the stairs of my apartment. I have been living
here since I entered my college. Home is pretty far. I try to visit home as frequent as possible, but
seems like Rin is still not satisfied. Even though we're twins, she is more like a younger sister. Being
30 seconds older makes me an older brother.
"Whoops" Lost in thought, I bump into someone at the door of the apartment. We both fall to
the ground. "Sorry, are you okay?" I get up quickly, and offer a hand to the person on the ground.
Why are you in such a hurry, nee-chan1? Rin grabs my hand, and gets up. Do you have to
meet someone aside from me? she says while fixing her skirt. I am dumbfounded for a moment.
Running into Rin here is totally unexpected.
Why are you hear, Rin? I ask puzzlingly. Arent we supposed to meet at the station?
Rin smiles at me sweetly then says Cuz I know you gonna be late, nee-chan. Strange. Its
the same smile my sister always does to me, but something seems off. I lead her upstairs to my room

short word for onee-chan which means older brother in Japanese

1

while thinking about this weird feeling. Before I have time to figure whats off, Rins voice interrupts
my thoughts.
I made you something to eat! She holds her hand up. In her hand is a lunchbox. She starts
unpacking the lunchbox and leaves it on the table. Argh! I still cant get rid of that weird feeling. It
continues nagging me. I need to figure it out. Something is off. I know something is wrong. Think.
Think! Something bad may happen and I need to avoid it at all cost. Should I be worried? Feeling
anxious because of your sisters smile seems wrong. It is wrong. Rin will never hurt me.
Eat up, nee-chan! Rin seems over-excited. She stares at me. I can see in her eyes a mixedup feeling that I cant understand. There is anxiety, nervousness, expectation, and something I dont
know. I reach for the rice ball, and eat it in one bite.
Nee-chan! You gonna choke for sure! Ill go get water, Rin says and runs out. I patiently
wait for her at the table. My mind wanders off. I need to know what is that feeling in her eyes. I need
to before its too late.
Suddenly, I feel the pain go through my body. It starts from my mouth then it goes to my
tongue, down my throat, and throughout my body. My throat is burning, but my body is cold. I am
numb. I can't even move my finger. I try to fight back the pain, but it gets worse. Argh! I can't think
nor feel my body. I lose sight of what is in front of me. Am I dying? Is this how it feel like? I can't
endure this anymore. I slowly close my eyes, and at that moment, I figure it out. That feeling in Rin's
eyes is a desire to kill, but why? Why me?
Will you give up on living? A mysterious voice echoes in my head when Im about to lose
consciousness. Where does it come from? I dont know, but theres one thing I know for sure.
No. After that, I see nothing but darkness.

The apples are eaten by bugs.

I wake up to the sound of the alarm clock. I cover my ears with my pillows, and sink myself
in bed. Rolling around in bed I don't want to get up. Wait, I have an appointment with Rin today, dont
I? I take a quick shower, and dash out off my room.
The weather is lovely. The warm sun beams down. Bright blue cloudless sky spreads endlessly over
my head. I sprint past the door of my apartment heading to the station. Rin comes to visit me today.
We were always together until recently.
As I'm crossing the road, I hear someone shout, "Watch out!" Things happen fast. I am sent
flying in the air. Things pass by me. I find myself lying on the road unable to move. That's when I
realize a car hit me. At first, there is no pain. I just lay there feeling numb. Then, it is as if I am
tortured. What I feel throughout my body is pain and only pain. I'm falling apart. My vision becomes
blurred, and I can barely breathe. One of the bones must have pierce into my lung. My back feels
sticky probably because of the pool of blood pouring from my body. At this rate, I'm going to die.
The last thing I see before I close my eyes is Rin stepping out of that car, the car that hits me.

"What is the meaning of this?" I ask the person behind me. My eyes are fixed on my twin's,
Len, dead body.
Hmm? Why do you ask? Is something wrong? The voice asks back. Oh, so now hes going
to play dumb. I can imagine him with his devil smile without even turning back.
I should have won already. Why is this still happening? I clench my fist so tight it hurts.
Argh! Hes so annoying. My body trembles with fury. I clench my teeth, and shout at him.
We have a deal!! Now, do what you suppose to do!! I grab his collar, and look into his
eyes, but there is nothing aside from dark deep emptiness. He chuckles.
Aww, poor Rin. He pretends to be sorry. I suppress the urge to punch him in the face, and
let him finish his sentence. I never said this gonna end in one round. Its a game.

"This is not a game!" He bursts out laughing. He smiles mischievously and says, "Oh! Yes, it
is. A pleasant game to kills my time. You know, I give you the advantage to remember, but I need to
give your brother something too, right? Otherwise, it'll be too easy and boring."
I wish I could just get rid of him. I feel bad for my twin, Len, but I cannot lose.
"Hahaha. I see that. That determination. You just need to make Len give up or else you two will be
stuck in this never-ending loop. Try harder, okay? Entertain me more. Maybe I give you more
advantages." He whispers in my ears like the sound of a devil.

The apples fall to the ground.

I wake up to the sound of the alarm clock. I'm too lazy to get up. I don't know why but I feel
kind of tired, specifically mentally tired even though yesterday was an easy day. Hmm what did I
do yesterday? Why did I forget? No, why did I even wonder? Yesterday was probably one normal day.
It must be so normal it slips off my mind. What do I have to do today? I grab the calendar on the
bedside table. Today is circled with red the letters says, Rins visit.'
I stare at the red letters. For a moment, I magically cant understand those letters. Shoot! I
take a quick shower. I check the time on my phone, but it is not the only thing I see. Rin sent me a
message.
Ill be on ya apartment roof. Lets have a picnic!
I sigh with relief. At least, I didnt leave her hanging at the station. I take the elevator up to
the roof. This apartment has 26 floors. If Ill walk, it probably drains all my energy.
The rooftop is empty. A Strong wind blows on my skin. I breathe in fresh air. The city spread
in front of me. From up here, the people are so tiny. I watch people quickly walk past each other.
Some are on phones. Some are running. A group of children is walking and laughing.
Nee- chan. I turn around, and all of a sudden, my feet cant feel the ground. Right in front
of me is Rin. I see guiltiness, hesitation, and confusion, but also hostility hiding in her eyes. Rins

expression is cold, but confused at the same time. I can no longer see her face. Im falling and falling.
The sky spreads over me, and the city spreads below me. The view is so beautiful.
As I become closer and closer to the ground, I wonder will my death be instant. Thats when I
collide head-on to the ground.
I lost my consciousness.

The apples are contaminated.

I wake up to the sound of the alarm clock. Mysteriously, my body feels heavy. I did sleep
early yesterday, didnt I? I dont want to get up. I know that there is something I must do, but I have
no wish nor will to get out of bed. I have this feeling that something bad may happen to me. I know it.
Wait, Why or how I know that? Something is missing, but I just dont what it is. I lay down in my bed
lost in thought.
Suddenly, I hear the sound of a glass shattered. Something is thrown in my room. Before I
realize, the fire starts in my room. It quickly spreads throughout the room blocking my way out of the
room. Jumping out of the window will just end up as suicide.
What to do? The flame is surrounding me. It is closing in. Another minute in here, I will end
up dying either because of flame or smoke. I have to risk. I run towards the door, but I slip. What on
the floor is a pool of oil.
I scream in agony. MY SKIN! My skin is burning! It hurts! It hurts so much! I need to get out
of here now! No way, Im going to survive in this room! I desperately dash for the door. My hand
reaches for the doorknob, but it is locked!
"Oww!! Argh!!" I'm covered in fire! I can't do this! This pain, I can't bear it. My skin is burnt.
Part of it is peeling off. I drop myself to the ground. What awaits me is oil. The flame becomes
stronger. It burns brilliantly. I close my eyes. I can't stand this fiery red any longer.

The apples fall apart.


I wake up to the sound of my alarm clock. I jerk up, and touch my skin. I have a dream that I
am burnt alive.
Ding-Dong Ding-Dong
Who? Its still early in the morning. I walk towards the door. I open the door, and find Rin
standing there with a smile on her face. Her face looks paler than usual.
Rin? She barges into my room. Whats gotten into her? I close the door and go after her. I
follow her into the kitchen.
Rin, whats wrong? She is still turning her back towards me. Last night, I had a weird
dream, I say trying end this uneasy atmosphere. I dreamt that I was burnt alive. Isnt it weird?
Rins respond is totally unexpected. Rin turns around with a knife in her hand. Lets end this,
nee-chan, she says with a cold voice then she stabs me in my chest.
I fall to the ground. At first, I cant feel anything. I see blood dripping. Then, I feel the pain
that I never felt before. My shaking hand tries to get the knife off my chest, but it only hurts more. Rin
just stands there staring and waiting for me to die.
"W-hy..?" I manage to ask her, but after that, I cough up blood. The blood spills over my chest
making the wound looks even scarier.
Rin does not answer instead she stomps on the knife like hitting a nail. She continues
stomping, and I feel wave and wave of pain. After a while, tears wells up in Rins eyes.
Why don't you just give up? Why? Just give up on living! Let me win! I want to answer, but
I cant. Whats she talking about? Before anything comes to my mind, Rin strangles me. I gasp for air.
Lets just end this thing. End it already! I cant take this anymore. Rin cries. She looks so
painful and desperate. Theres only one of us that can survive. You make me do this! Thats when it
comes to me.

Before it goes wrong.

Rin and I, we are on the brink of death. We were involved in a car accident, but instead of
waking up in the hospital, I woke up in the suspicious dark room with Rin sitting beside me looking
scared. I remembered a man, a devil, spoke to us.
"Do you want to survive?" he asked as he played with his walking stick. He is a tall young
man in black suit and a robe of the same color. His eyes were what stood out the most. He had no
white eye. His eyes were all black like a bottomless hole.
You guys are on the brink of death, you know, but I can help. He smiled demonically.
We wont believe you, Rin said hiding behind my back. The devil man chuckled.
You two know damn too well that only one of you are going to survive. You two heard it.
True. Before losing consciousness, I heard the guys from the hospital. Theres not enough blood for
either of us.
"Let's have a deal!" The devil man spun around in a circle. "I have a good deal for you two,"
he said in excitement.
Suddenly, he appeared in front of me and Rin. "I'm getting bored. Please, I need some
entertainment." He's making the puppy eyes like that would make him look pitiful.
One of youll survive! You can escape death! He threw his hands in the air with a big smile
on his face. Rin stepped in front of me.
"Then, it's a deal." What! What did she say? Rin turned back and spoke to me, "One of us has
to survive, nee-chan."
What we need to do? I asked the devil man.
You just have to kill each other! He answered with excitement.
What are you talking about! Then, how will one of us survive!
Its fine. Its fine. A deal is a deal. Dont worry about anything. Suddenly, my eyes felt
heavy. The last thing I saw before my eyes were completely closed was the devil man whispering into
Rins ear.

Tears fall down my eyes. I remember everything at the last moment. I remember it all. How
many times has Rin killed me? How many times have I woken up in my bed not remembering
anything? It hurts. It hurts a lot every time I die. The pain is unbearable. To live is so painful. It is too
painful for me. I give up. I'm afraid of living. I'm going to let Rin win. This time, I'll really die, but it
doesn't matter. I won't feel the pain anymore.
At the last moment of my life, I smile at Rin.

Settlement.

I look at Lens smile. Why does he smile at me? He should be mad. He should have punched
me. I kill him so many times. I intentionally choose painful ways to die for him, so hell give up on
living.
"Congratulation!" The devil man appears before me. "Len have given up."
All the strength leaves my hand. I drop Lens dead body on the floor. My twin, my one and
only brother, hes lying in front of me lifeless. I win, but I dont feel any happiness.
"You have escaped death, Rin! You should be happier!" The devil man shouts. "Watching you
two are so entertaining. I'm in a frenzy!" He jumps around the room.
I cant speak a word. I feel numb. A part of me is gone. Empty. I am so empty. Theres
nothing left in me.
Now, for your reward! Suddenly, the elevator appears in front of me. The devil man pushes
me inside of the elevator, and I just stand there like a robot. He waves me goodbye.
The elevators door closes. Im surrounded by darkness.

I wave goodbye to one of the twins until the elevator is gone. Theres one more thing for me
to do. I do a jump.
I appear at Lens room in the hospital. Len is sleeping on the patient bed. His face is as white
as a paper. His pulse is weak, but hes still alive. I wave my hand over his head.

Len's eyes quiver, then he opens his eyes.

Welcome back to Earth, I say to him.
Why am I here? What about Rin?
She is down there. I point downward. Emptiness. A way of escaping death I would say. I
wait for his reaction. Humans are interesting. Observing them never made me feel bored.
But, Why? Why Im Living! I don't wanna live anymore. He shouts. Tears roll down his
eyes. Why me? I want to die! Let me die! Take my life!
I laugh. No. No. Youll continue living. Oh! By the way, you cant kill yourself. I have put a
little curse on you. Think of it as a parting gift.
But. But. No! He screams. His eyes fill with terror. Tears still roll down his eyes. The look
on his face is priceless. I don't want to feel the pain of dying anymore. No! No! I refuse to live!
After that, Len starts destroying things. The vase falls and breaks. The IV tube connecting to
his blood vessel is pulled off. He screams. Brilliant red blood splashes all over the blanket. He goes
nuts. Len moves around in his bed destroying everything then he falls off. The sound of the patients
bed crashes to the floor echoing through out the empty room. Thats when a group of nurses rush in,
and try to hold him down. I turn around walking towards the door.
Catch him! Dont let him leave! Grab him! Len points at me, but the nurses just knit their
eyebrows in confusion.
Theres no one there, sir. They says. Len looks shocked.
I giggle to myself. Well, time to go. I look at one of the twins for the last time. They are
entertaining, the twins. It almost makes me a little sad to say goodbye. Almost. People of my kind
wont become sad over this kind of things.
No! No! Let me die! The sound of Lens shout follows me as Im leaving the scene. Now,
lets find a new human to ease my boredom. I walk out of the hospital, and disappear in the crowd.