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2
00:01:08,367 --> 00:01:09,447
Ooh.
3
00:01:22,174 --> 00:01:23,574
# I woke up in a stupor #
4
00:01:23,675 --> 00:01:25,275
# Guess it's time
to face the pooper #
5
00:01:25,385 --> 00:01:26,785
# Sometimes
I feel like Superman #
6
00:01:26,886 --> 00:01:29,966
# Sometimes
I'm just recuperating #
7
00:01:30,099 --> 00:01:31,579
# Yeah #
8
00:01:34,437 --> 00:01:35,877
# My head
Is twisting in its cage #
9
00:01:35,980 --> 00:01:37,700
# My mind
feels like a twenty gauge #
10
00:01:37,773 --> 00:01:39,333
# Hope it's just
a passing stage #
11
00:01:39,442 --> 00:01:40,762
# My heart's not red,
it's beige #
12
00:01:40,861 --> 00:01:43,101
# It's days like this
that burn me #
13
00:01:43,237 --> 00:01:46,397
# Turn me inside out

and learn me #
14
00:01:46,575 --> 00:01:50,455
# Not to tell you anything
I think I know #
15
00:01:50,662 --> 00:01:52,702
# But I think I'll tell you
all that I know #
16
00:01:52,831 --> 00:01:54,511
# Tried to tell you
all about it #
17
00:01:54,625 --> 00:01:56,265
# Thought you might've heard,
I doubt it #
18
00:01:56,377 --> 00:01:59,217
# Every day's a waste I know,
and every day's a funeral #
19
00:01:59,380 --> 00:02:00,860
# Cutting out,
I'm feeling lost #
20
00:02:00,965 --> 00:02:02,485
# Lost my mind,
I'm Mr. Frost #
21
00:02:02,591 --> 00:02:04,151
# Collected all the evidence,
I'm off the edge #
22
00:02:04,259 --> 00:02:05,579
# I'm on the fence #
23
00:02:05,678 --> 00:02:07,758
# It's days like this
that burn me #
24
00:02:07,890 --> 00:02:09,810
# Turn me inside out
and learn me #
25
00:02:09,933 --> 00:02:11,813
Hello. Hello

26
00:02:11,935 --> 00:02:14,335
- So... Wait Hey Hey
- What?
27
00:02:14,480 --> 00:02:16,160
You're such a rogue.
Gimme that.
28
00:02:16,274 --> 00:02:18,314
- No!
- Gimme that.
29
00:02:18,442 --> 00:02:21,442
Hey... hey! Hey! Hey!
30
00:02:21,612 --> 00:02:23,732
# I want to sink
to the bottom of the ocean #
31
00:02:23,823 --> 00:02:25,823
- Hey! Hey!
- Hey?
32
00:02:25,950 --> 00:02:28,550
# With you till I'm gone #
33
00:02:28,704 --> 00:02:32,744
# At the bottom
of the big blue sea #
34
00:02:32,958 --> 00:02:34,918
# Just you and me #
35
00:02:35,043 --> 00:02:41,843
# At the bottom
of the big blue sea #
36
00:02:42,176 --> 00:02:45,136
Hey, baby. Baby!
37
00:02:45,305 --> 00:02:48,945
Turn it off.
Ugh! Turn it off!
38
00:02:49,142 --> 00:02:51,182
- Turn it off!

39
00:02:57,108 --> 00:02:58,508
Do you think this is a joke?
40
00:02:58,611 --> 00:03:00,451
When I come home tonight,
we're gonna talk about this...
41
00:03:00,571 --> 00:03:01,651
'cause this is not working.
42
00:03:01,739 --> 00:03:04,379
You want to push it
even further?
43
00:03:04,534 --> 00:03:06,494
Whatever. This is ridiculous.
44
00:03:09,664 --> 00:03:11,744
# Turn me inside out
and learn me #
45
00:03:11,874 --> 00:03:16,354
# Not to tell you anything
I think I know #
46
00:03:16,546 --> 00:03:19,506
# But I think
I tell you more than I know #
47
00:03:19,675 --> 00:03:23,155
# I don't want to be alone,
I want to be a stone #
48
00:03:23,345 --> 00:03:26,305
# I want to sink
to the bottom of the ocean #
49
00:03:26,473 --> 00:03:27,673
# And lie there,
lie there with you #
50
00:03:28,642 --> 00:03:32,562
# Lie there with you
till I'm gone #
51
00:03:48,456 --> 00:03:50,776
It happened again...

52
00:03:50,916 --> 00:03:52,436
last night.
53
00:03:52,543 --> 00:03:55,863
- Ohh.
- Mmm.
54
00:03:56,046 --> 00:03:57,566
It's hard to explain.
55
00:03:57,673 --> 00:03:59,993
It starts out
like an earthquake...
56
00:04:02,011 --> 00:04:04,811
And I look over at the girl
next to me...
57
00:04:04,973 --> 00:04:07,493
and whoever she is,
she's not Nicole.
58
00:04:09,895 --> 00:04:12,255
And all I feel is emptiness.
59
00:04:13,691 --> 00:04:14,971
And that's when it happens.
60
00:04:16,693 --> 00:04:20,533
This great big black hole...
61
00:04:20,740 --> 00:04:22,780
opens up over my head.
62
00:04:22,909 --> 00:04:24,949
Again with the black hole.
63
00:04:25,077 --> 00:04:28,717
- Yeah.
64
00:04:28,916 --> 00:04:32,476
It's nothing but vast emptiness.
65
00:04:32,670 --> 00:04:36,590
- And then what?

- I panic.
66
00:04:48,979 --> 00:04:50,099
- Unh!
67
00:05:00,283 --> 00:05:02,963
You gotta help me.
You gotta...
68
00:05:03,119 --> 00:05:04,279
light a candle for me
or something.
69
00:05:04,370 --> 00:05:05,490
I'm not lighting a candle...
70
00:05:05,579 --> 00:05:06,939
so you can feel better
about getting laid.
71
00:05:07,039 --> 00:05:08,439
That's not what this is about.
72
00:05:09,751 --> 00:05:12,311
Look, it's been six months
since Nicole dumped you.
73
00:05:12,462 --> 00:05:14,622
And you're running around
feeling sorry for yourself...
74
00:05:14,757 --> 00:05:15,957
screwing every woman in sight.
75
00:05:16,049 --> 00:05:18,049
You want me to tell you it's OK,
that God forgives you...
76
00:05:18,176 --> 00:05:20,536
but at some point, it's not OK,
and he doesn't forgive you!
77
00:05:20,680 --> 00:05:21,760
What kind of advice is that?
78
00:05:21,846 --> 00:05:23,526
If you don't like my advice,

go see a real priest.

79
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How will you be a real priest
if you can't follow the rules?
80
00:05:30,355 --> 00:05:32,715
Besides, you're...
81
00:05:32,859 --> 00:05:35,499
you're the only priest I know
who happens to be my brother.
82
00:05:35,654 --> 00:05:38,574
And you're only a year away
from being a real priest anyway.
83
00:05:38,782 --> 00:05:40,742
Two years.
Look, what you need to do...
84
00:05:40,867 --> 00:05:44,187
is deal with your emotions
and stop screwing around.
85
00:05:44,371 --> 00:05:47,851
What I don't need
is a lecture from you, dick.
86
00:05:50,545 --> 00:05:51,865
You're the dick
87
00:05:53,631 --> 00:05:56,791
No. That sounds great.
That sounds incredible.
88
00:05:56,969 --> 00:05:59,769
Uh-huh. We'll probably have
to bump a few things...
89
00:05:59,930 --> 00:06:02,770
from our schedule, but we can
make it happen for tonight.
90
00:06:02,975 --> 00:06:04,695
Yeah. Matt and I will
definitely be there tonight.

91
00:06:04,810 --> 00:06:06,250
We're putting our bells on
right now.
92
00:06:06,353 --> 00:06:10,193
OK. All right. Bye-bye.
93
00:06:10,399 --> 00:06:13,639
- I can't go.
- What are you talking about?
94
00:06:13,820 --> 00:06:15,620
I just don't feel like it
right now.
95
00:06:15,738 --> 00:06:17,098
You don't fe... Look!
96
00:06:17,198 --> 00:06:19,598
I know you're still trying to
work out your Nicole issues...
97
00:06:19,743 --> 00:06:22,223
with the big black hole,
but trust me, trust me...
98
00:06:22,371 --> 00:06:23,891
I don't have any Nicole issues.
99
00:06:23,998 --> 00:06:27,598
Hi. I'm one of the many
pictures of Nicole...
100
00:06:27,793 --> 00:06:30,353
that infest Ryan and Matt's
apartment after six months.
101
00:06:30,505 --> 00:06:32,105
And she's hot, Matt.
I don't mind looking at her.
102
00:06:32,215 --> 00:06:33,295
I'm just saying you have issues.
103
00:06:33,381 --> 00:06:34,621
These are not issues.

104
00:06:34,717 --> 00:06:36,157
Do you still think about her
when you jerk off?
105
00:06:37,595 --> 00:06:39,475
Anyway, I've got something
that's gonna make it all better.
106
00:06:39,597 --> 00:06:42,877
Those two girls
we met in Tahoe...
107
00:06:43,059 --> 00:06:45,699
in town for one night
and one night only.
108
00:06:48,231 --> 00:06:50,551
Don't say no yet.
No, don't say no. No, no, no.
109
00:06:50,692 --> 00:06:54,132
"I want to come. They're hot.
I want pussy."
110
00:06:54,321 --> 00:06:55,401
Oh, yeah!
111
00:07:04,332 --> 00:07:06,612
- Hi.
- Hi.
112
00:07:06,751 --> 00:07:07,831
How are you doing?
113
00:07:07,920 --> 00:07:09,520
- Good.
- Good.
114
00:07:09,630 --> 00:07:11,150
- You?
- Excellent.
115
00:07:11,256 --> 00:07:13,176
Good.
116
00:07:14,385 --> 00:07:15,745
Mmm. Waiter?

117
00:07:18,597 --> 00:07:21,877
This isn't Absolut Vodka.
I ordered Absolut.
118
00:07:22,059 --> 00:07:24,979
- Yes, it is.
- Are you calling me a liar?
119
00:07:25,146 --> 00:07:27,386
I'll bring you another one.
120
00:07:29,651 --> 00:07:32,811
Sorry. I hope
I didn't come off as mean.
121
00:07:32,988 --> 00:07:36,868
No, no, no.
You know what you want.
122
00:07:37,076 --> 00:07:38,556
That's a good thing, right?
123
00:07:38,661 --> 00:07:41,941
Yeah. Yeah. Yes, I do.
124
00:07:42,123 --> 00:07:44,683
I know exactly what I want.
125
00:07:54,260 --> 00:07:55,740
Mmm.
126
00:08:00,642 --> 00:08:02,562
Unh!
127
00:08:02,686 --> 00:08:04,686
Oh!
128
00:08:04,814 --> 00:08:05,894
I'm sorry. I'm sorry.
129
00:08:05,981 --> 00:08:08,101
- What's wrong?
- Nothing.
130
00:08:08,234 --> 00:08:10,274

- I'll be right back, OK?

- OK.
131
00:08:12,655 --> 00:08:14,655
- Get it together.
132
00:08:16,034 --> 00:08:19,034
Hey. Throw me a magnum
for my magnum, big boy?
133
00:08:19,204 --> 00:08:21,324
- Yeah.
- Thank you.
134
00:08:21,415 --> 00:08:24,855
Hey, have you ever noticed
the crack on my ceiling?
135
00:08:25,043 --> 00:08:28,163
Dude, you're action-packed
with issues.
136
00:08:28,339 --> 00:08:31,819
I can't do this anymore.
I can't do it.
137
00:08:32,009 --> 00:08:34,049
What, does Johnny
not want to come out and play?
138
00:08:34,179 --> 00:08:37,299
No. Johnny... Johnny's fine, OK?
139
00:08:37,432 --> 00:08:40,032
It's...
I'm all fucked up.
140
00:08:40,184 --> 00:08:42,864
All right,
here's what you're gonna do.
141
00:08:43,021 --> 00:08:44,861
You're gonna strap
a helmet on Big John...
142
00:08:44,981 --> 00:08:47,141
put him in the game and he will
play his little heart out.

143
00:08:47,276 --> 00:08:48,716
OK? He'll put up
big numbers for you.
144
00:08:48,819 --> 00:08:51,259
You're gonna forget about
the cracks in the ceiling...
145
00:08:51,405 --> 00:08:52,885
forget about Nicole.
146
00:08:52,990 --> 00:08:56,790
Go out and give your star player
the support he needs.
147
00:08:56,995 --> 00:08:59,435
- Right?
- Right.
148
00:08:59,580 --> 00:09:01,300
Helmet.
149
00:09:01,416 --> 00:09:03,616
Oh, God! Yes! Ohh!
150
00:09:03,752 --> 00:09:05,352
Oh! Oh!
151
00:09:05,462 --> 00:09:08,182
Oh, come with me.
Come with me. Are you ready?
152
00:09:08,341 --> 00:09:10,261
- Almost.
- Oh, yeah! Oh, yeah!
153
00:09:10,384 --> 00:09:13,384
Oh, yes! Oh!
154
00:09:16,099 --> 00:09:19,579
- What are you looking at?
- Nothing. Nothing.
155
00:09:19,769 --> 00:09:22,249
- I'm... Unh.
- Oh! Oh!

156
00:09:22,396 --> 00:09:25,236
Oh! Oh, yeah!
157
00:09:26,568 --> 00:09:30,208
Are you with me?
I'm close. I'm close.
158
00:09:30,405 --> 00:09:33,605
Unh! Oh! Oh, God!
159
00:09:33,783 --> 00:09:35,663
- Ready?
- Now?
160
00:09:35,787 --> 00:09:37,667
Now! Ohh!
161
00:09:37,789 --> 00:09:39,269
Ohh.
162
00:09:44,545 --> 00:09:48,545
Ohhhh!
163
00:09:48,758 --> 00:09:51,918
Ohhhh!
164
00:09:52,096 --> 00:09:53,776
Unh.
165
00:09:53,889 --> 00:09:56,209
Oh-ho!
166
00:09:56,350 --> 00:09:58,430
Ohh.
167
00:09:58,519 --> 00:10:01,159
Ahh.
168
00:10:01,313 --> 00:10:03,433
What the fuck was that?
169
00:10:04,818 --> 00:10:06,018
W-what?
170

00:10:06,110 --> 00:10:09,350

- Did you come?
- Yeah.
171
00:10:09,531 --> 00:10:11,251
No, you didn't. You faked it.
172
00:10:11,367 --> 00:10:14,887
No, no, no. Guys don't fake it.
I don't even think that we can.
173
00:10:15,078 --> 00:10:16,598
- You faked it.
- Hey.
174
00:10:18,915 --> 00:10:21,195
Hey. Hey.
175
00:10:23,796 --> 00:10:25,556
Let go!
176
00:10:25,673 --> 00:10:29,393
- Show me.
- Show you what?
177
00:10:29,594 --> 00:10:31,994
You know. The stuff.
178
00:10:32,138 --> 00:10:34,338
This is ridiculous.
179
00:10:34,474 --> 00:10:36,234
What are you hiding?
180
00:10:36,351 --> 00:10:39,791
Nothing.
Just give me second, OK?
181
00:10:43,859 --> 00:10:45,179
- Ow!
182
00:10:45,277 --> 00:10:47,797
- Just a sec.
183
00:10:50,533 --> 00:10:53,533
Here we go. Use anything.

184
00:10:53,703 --> 00:10:56,343
- What's going on?
- I need something.
185
00:10:56,497 --> 00:10:59,257
Anything that looks
like semen. OK?
186
00:10:59,417 --> 00:11:00,857
Something
that looks like semen?
187
00:11:03,088 --> 00:11:04,728
What is going on out there?
188
00:11:09,261 --> 00:11:10,581
Fuck!
189
00:11:11,764 --> 00:11:15,964
Eww.
You are such a bad liar.
190
00:11:21,983 --> 00:11:25,263
- Hey, Duncan.
191
00:11:25,486 --> 00:11:28,246
- Thanks a lot, man.
- What's up, Matt?
192
00:11:28,407 --> 00:11:30,487
- What's up, man?
- Chris.
193
00:11:30,617 --> 00:11:33,057
Heard you tried to leave one
in the chamber last night.
194
00:11:33,204 --> 00:11:35,844
- Where'd you hear that?
- internet.
195
00:11:35,998 --> 00:11:38,718
It's all on the internet
nowadays, you know.
196
00:11:38,877 --> 00:11:40,397
This is an internet company.

197
00:11:40,503 --> 00:11:42,063
And Ryan has a big mouth, huh?
198
00:11:42,172 --> 00:11:44,972
- Morning, ladies.
- Hmm.
199
00:11:47,511 --> 00:11:50,231
So, you in on
the basketball pool or what?
200
00:11:50,388 --> 00:11:51,588
What's the line
on that game anyway?
201
00:11:51,640 --> 00:11:54,640
I'll talk to the bagel guy
when he gets here.
202
00:11:54,809 --> 00:11:57,049
What does the bagel guy
have to do with this?
203
00:11:57,187 --> 00:11:59,907
The bagel guy knows everything.
The dude's incredible.
204
00:12:00,066 --> 00:12:02,066
Then how come can't he get here
on time with the bagels?
205
00:12:04,487 --> 00:12:06,967
- Appreciate it.
- Is that what I think it is?
206
00:12:07,115 --> 00:12:09,235
- Don't worry.
- Can I see it?
207
00:12:09,367 --> 00:12:13,687
Hey. Dude, it's just been one
of those days, you know?
208
00:12:13,913 --> 00:12:15,433
Yes, I do.
209

00:12:15,540 --> 00:12:18,300

I got held up at this importexport place in Chinatown.
210
00:12:18,460 --> 00:12:20,340
Some party.
211
00:12:20,462 --> 00:12:22,582
- Golden Spear?
- That's the one.
212
00:12:22,674 --> 00:12:25,194
Their mimosas they make there
are strong.
213
00:12:25,343 --> 00:12:27,143
Go straight to your head.
Blbbh.
214
00:12:28,929 --> 00:12:31,129
I used to know someone
who worked there.
215
00:12:31,266 --> 00:12:33,146
You know Tatiana?
216
00:12:33,268 --> 00:12:34,908
Yeah, I know Tatiana.
She's nice.
217
00:12:35,019 --> 00:12:36,259
No, she's not nice.
She's hot.
218
00:12:36,355 --> 00:12:38,315
I'd hit that.
And how about Merj?
219
00:12:38,440 --> 00:12:39,920
Yeah, I know Merj.
220
00:12:40,025 --> 00:12:42,385
And what about that really
hot chick that got engaged?
221
00:12:42,528 --> 00:12:44,208
That was funny.

222
00:12:44,322 --> 00:12:45,642
What really hot chick
got engaged?
223
00:12:45,740 --> 00:12:49,780
The expediter chick.
You know, real slinky.
224
00:12:49,994 --> 00:12:52,114
- What's her name?
- Nicole?
225
00:12:52,247 --> 00:12:53,447
Nicole. That's it.
226
00:12:53,540 --> 00:12:55,420
Man, she knows the guy,
like, two weeks.
227
00:12:55,542 --> 00:12:57,822
She goes to France,
she comes back, she's engaged.
228
00:12:57,960 --> 00:13:00,240
Now, she is
spontaneous combustion hot.
229
00:13:00,380 --> 00:13:03,380
- I would definitely hit that.
230
00:13:03,551 --> 00:13:06,991
How do you know it's Nicole...
N-Nicole that got engaged?
231
00:13:07,179 --> 00:13:09,499
Dude, that's what the banner
said at the party.
232
00:13:09,641 --> 00:13:11,641
"Congratulations Nicole."
233
00:13:11,768 --> 00:13:13,488
Whew. I can't believe it...
234
00:13:13,603 --> 00:13:15,363
because that girl, you can't
even look right at her.

235
00:13:15,480 --> 00:13:18,840
She's so hot you need one of
those eclipse-watching things...
236
00:13:19,025 --> 00:13:21,665
just to look directly at her,
she's so radiantly hot!
237
00:13:21,820 --> 00:13:24,380
It makes me want to just
throw her down, you know...
238
00:13:24,532 --> 00:13:26,892
and justYou know what I mean?
239
00:13:27,033 --> 00:13:28,793
Yeah.
240
00:13:28,911 --> 00:13:30,671
I'm glad we can connect on that.
241
00:13:33,582 --> 00:13:34,742
Later, pimp.
242
00:13:34,834 --> 00:13:37,234
- Later.
- Rrr!
243
00:13:47,056 --> 00:13:49,456
Hey, Matt...
244
00:13:49,600 --> 00:13:51,520
Matt?
245
00:13:51,643 --> 00:13:53,603
You... you all right?
246
00:14:45,910 --> 00:14:47,910
- Unh!
- Oh! Oh!
247
00:14:48,037 --> 00:14:51,157
- Oh, God. I am so sorry.
- it s OK. it s OK.

248
00:14:51,332 --> 00:14:53,212
- Are you OK?
- Yeah, I'm fine.
249
00:14:53,334 --> 00:14:56,534
Is there anything I can do
to make it better?
250
00:14:56,714 --> 00:14:58,994
Um...
251
00:14:59,133 --> 00:15:00,653
anything?
252
00:15:00,926 --> 00:15:04,766
Again?
Another girl already?
253
00:15:04,973 --> 00:15:09,013
- It s not even the weekend.
- I know, I know.
254
00:15:09,185 --> 00:15:12,985
She met someone.
Nicole's getting married.
255
00:15:14,691 --> 00:15:17,011
I'm sorry.
256
00:15:17,152 --> 00:15:19,472
I mean, what can I do?
257
00:15:19,613 --> 00:15:23,053
- Tell me what I can do.
- I don't know what to tell you.
258
00:15:23,242 --> 00:15:26,042
This isn't really a problem
I know much about.
259
00:15:28,289 --> 00:15:29,849
Listen, isn't
part of the priestly thing...
260
00:15:29,957 --> 00:15:32,077
giving relationship advice?

261
00:15:32,209 --> 00:15:34,569
Relationship advice, yes.
262
00:15:34,713 --> 00:15:36,753
Sex advice, no.
263
00:15:36,882 --> 00:15:39,442
Part of the priestly thing,
and stop calling it that...
264
00:15:39,592 --> 00:15:40,952
is not to have sex, remember?
265
00:15:41,053 --> 00:15:43,373
It s funny.
I didn't say a thing about sex.
266
00:15:43,514 --> 00:15:45,634
- Sure you did.
- No, I didn't.
267
00:15:45,766 --> 00:15:48,526
I guess thinking about sex
is part of the priestly thing.
268
00:15:48,686 --> 00:15:49,766
At least for some.
269
00:15:49,854 --> 00:15:52,734
- Get out.
- Fine.
270
00:15:58,071 --> 00:16:02,351
- Good morning, Matt.
- Morning, father.
271
00:16:02,575 --> 00:16:04,215
What's with the purple banners?
272
00:16:04,328 --> 00:16:07,008
Lent. Starts today.
273
00:16:07,164 --> 00:16:09,604
Going to be a long forty days
this year.
274

00:16:09,750 --> 00:16:11,950

I'm giving up my one vice...
275
00:16:12,086 --> 00:16:14,686
those precious little
Madeleine cookies...
276
00:16:14,840 --> 00:16:17,280
dipped in a starbucks mocha.
277
00:16:17,424 --> 00:16:21,424
It's so hard giving up
what you love the most.
278
00:16:25,976 --> 00:16:28,816
I've got it! Jesus Christ,
John, I've got an answer!
279
00:16:28,979 --> 00:16:30,219
And the question is?
280
00:16:30,313 --> 00:16:31,593
- Nicole.
- Again?
281
00:16:31,691 --> 00:16:34,491
No sex for Lent...
for forty days.
282
00:16:34,652 --> 00:16:36,572
If I can do that,
then everything will be OK.
283
00:16:36,695 --> 00:16:37,895
That isn't what Lent is.
284
00:16:37,947 --> 00:16:41,027
Lent is about sacrifice
and growth through self-denial.
285
00:16:41,200 --> 00:16:42,320
Lent is to remember...
286
00:16:42,410 --> 00:16:45,210
How Christ felt
during the fast in the desert.
287

00:16:45,371 --> 00:16:47,051

I grew up in the same house
as you, moron.
288
00:16:47,165 --> 00:16:49,445
But when it comes down to it,
that's exactly what this is.
289
00:16:49,584 --> 00:16:51,664
This is growth,
this is self-denial...
290
00:16:51,795 --> 00:16:54,835
and this is sacrifice.
291
00:16:55,007 --> 00:16:58,047
Dude!
292
00:16:58,218 --> 00:16:59,898
It's not that simple, Matt.
Trust me.
293
00:17:00,013 --> 00:17:01,133
It is that...
294
00:17:03,474 --> 00:17:06,234
You're right.
295
00:17:06,394 --> 00:17:09,594
You're totally right.
296
00:17:09,773 --> 00:17:12,373
Sex alone is not enough.
297
00:17:12,525 --> 00:17:14,885
It has to be sex
and all things sex-like.
298
00:17:15,029 --> 00:17:16,949
You'll never be able to do that.
299
00:17:17,072 --> 00:17:18,712
Just listen, here's the plan.
300
00:17:18,824 --> 00:17:21,424
One... no sex.

301
00:17:21,577 --> 00:17:24,257
Two...
no sexual intimacy of any kind.
302
00:17:24,414 --> 00:17:26,734
No nibbling, no biting,
no scratching.
303
00:17:26,874 --> 00:17:30,474
No sucking, no fondling.
None of that.
304
00:17:30,670 --> 00:17:33,270
And three...
305
00:17:33,423 --> 00:17:35,863
no masturbation.
306
00:17:36,010 --> 00:17:37,850
You won't last a week.
307
00:17:37,970 --> 00:17:39,730
Oh, you're wrong, brother.
308
00:17:39,846 --> 00:17:42,086
I'm gonna go the distance.
309
00:17:43,808 --> 00:17:50,808
Mmm #
310
00:17:51,151 --> 00:17:52,951
# Then I was grown
to be a man #
311
00:17:53,027 --> 00:17:54,627
# Grown to be a man #
312
00:17:54,737 --> 00:17:56,337
# And the devil
would call my name #
313
00:17:56,447 --> 00:17:58,207
# Grown to be a man #
314
00:17:58,324 --> 00:18:00,604
# I said, "Who do"#

315
00:18:00,744 --> 00:18:03,184
# "Who do you think
you're foolin'?"#
316
00:18:03,331 --> 00:18:04,811
# Grown to be a man #
317
00:18:04,915 --> 00:18:07,835
# I can snatch
a little purity #
318
00:18:08,002 --> 00:18:10,282
# My mama loved me #
319
00:18:10,422 --> 00:18:11,982
# She loved me #
320
00:18:12,090 --> 00:18:14,650
# She got down on her knees
and hugged me #
321
00:18:14,802 --> 00:18:17,682
# And she loved me
like a rock #
322
00:18:17,845 --> 00:18:19,165
# Whoa, yeah #
323
00:18:19,263 --> 00:18:23,543
# Rocked me like the rock
of ages and loved me #
324
00:18:23,768 --> 00:18:26,008
# She loved me, loved me,
loved me #
325
00:18:26,147 --> 00:18:27,667
# Loved me like a rock #
326
00:18:27,773 --> 00:18:29,693
# My mama loves me #
327
00:18:29,817 --> 00:18:31,697
# Loves me like a rock #
328

00:18:31,818 --> 00:18:33,778

Your brother looks happy.
329
00:18:33,945 --> 00:18:36,585
He's just taken
a vow of celibacy.
330
00:18:36,741 --> 00:18:38,621
Oh.
331
00:18:38,743 --> 00:18:40,103
Oh, dear.
332
00:18:51,131 --> 00:18:54,091
# Live, baby, live #
333
00:18:54,260 --> 00:18:56,420
# Now that the day is over #
334
00:18:59,223 --> 00:19:01,823
# I got a new sensation #
335
00:19:03,227 --> 00:19:06,467
# In perfect moments #
336
00:19:06,649 --> 00:19:11,569
# So impossible to refuse #
337
00:19:16,241 --> 00:19:19,201
# Sleep, baby, sleep #
338
00:19:19,370 --> 00:19:22,130
# Now that the night is over #
339
00:19:23,917 --> 00:19:27,557
# And the sun comes
like a God #
340
00:19:27,755 --> 00:19:30,075
# Into our room #
341
00:19:30,215 --> 00:19:33,415
Whoo. Dude.
342
00:19:33,593 --> 00:19:35,473
# All perfect light

and prom... #
343
00:19:36,972 --> 00:19:38,052
Dude.
344
00:19:38,140 --> 00:19:39,540
What the fuck is that?
345
00:19:39,642 --> 00:19:43,162
This is a 1966
Karmann Ghia coupe.
346
00:19:43,353 --> 00:19:44,433
When I'm finished with that,
I'm gonna do...
347
00:19:44,522 --> 00:19:47,442
the Caterham super seven
cycle-fender special.
348
00:19:49,694 --> 00:19:52,534
We're going out tonight.
There's this club...
349
00:19:52,656 --> 00:19:54,216
Remember that Australian
chick... Jennifer Moss?
350
00:19:54,324 --> 00:19:56,084
She's got friends visiting
from Sydney.
351
00:19:56,159 --> 00:19:57,599
Can't. I have laundry.
352
00:19:57,703 --> 00:20:01,303
Do you know why they call it
down under, Matt?
353
00:20:01,498 --> 00:20:03,138
I still can't.
354
00:20:03,250 --> 00:20:06,330
Do you realize how much time
we waste thinking about girls?
355
00:20:08,047 --> 00:20:11,567

You want some alone time in

the apartment for jerking off.
356
00:20:11,760 --> 00:20:13,720
That's cool.
I can do that. That's cool.
357
00:20:13,845 --> 00:20:16,765
I'll tell 'em you said hi.
358
00:20:56,224 --> 00:20:58,144
Ohh.
359
00:21:03,398 --> 00:21:06,438
Do you have change
for two dollars?
360
00:21:26,673 --> 00:21:28,473
Excuse me.
I forgot something to read.
361
00:21:28,592 --> 00:21:30,272
Do you mind if I borrow this?
362
00:21:30,385 --> 00:21:32,505
Thanks.
363
00:21:39,312 --> 00:21:40,672
A lovers' rendezvous.
364
00:21:42,940 --> 00:21:46,220
You... you underline words
that you don't know...
365
00:21:46,403 --> 00:21:47,443
and then look them up later?
366
00:21:47,529 --> 00:21:50,849
Right?
And you underlined "tryst"...
367
00:21:51,033 --> 00:21:53,673
which is a meeting of lovers.
368
00:21:56,413 --> 00:21:58,973
I do that, too, so...

369
00:22:09,219 --> 00:22:12,019
Matt?
370
00:22:12,181 --> 00:22:14,581
It was on the cover
of the magazine.
371
00:22:16,519 --> 00:22:18,519
Can I borrow
a sheet of fabric softener?
372
00:22:22,483 --> 00:22:23,763
Thanks.
373
00:22:37,207 --> 00:22:40,167
It's been really fun
almost chatting with you.
374
00:22:42,128 --> 00:22:43,368
Same time next week?
375
00:22:45,174 --> 00:22:47,534
OK. Bye.
376
00:22:56,395 --> 00:22:58,235
You are way ahead of schedule.
377
00:22:58,355 --> 00:23:01,155
If I were you, I'd give me
something else to do quick.
378
00:23:01,316 --> 00:23:02,596
What about
the Willow and Smart account?
379
00:23:02,693 --> 00:23:03,853
Think you can handle that?
380
00:23:03,944 --> 00:23:05,344
I know window treatments
aren't the sexiest...
381
00:23:05,446 --> 00:23:08,086
Oh, no, no.
Doesn't bother me at all.
382

00:23:08,240 --> 00:23:10,960

Good. You'll be designing
the entire webpage.
383
00:23:13,413 --> 00:23:14,533
OK.
384
00:23:26,635 --> 00:23:28,995
Hey, Ryan.
What's happening?
385
00:23:29,138 --> 00:23:32,298
# Turn off the lights #
386
00:23:33,893 --> 00:23:35,813
Do you know
how many hours I spent...
387
00:23:35,938 --> 00:23:37,458
Iooking for
my Temple of Poon tape?
388
00:23:37,564 --> 00:23:40,124
One. That's a long time
to be looking for porn, Matt.
389
00:23:40,275 --> 00:23:41,755
What the fuck is going on here?
390
00:23:44,071 --> 00:23:46,471
One... you can't do it.
391
00:23:46,615 --> 00:23:49,255
You can't. This isn't
a personal attack towards you.
392
00:23:49,409 --> 00:23:51,729
No man can do it.
It goes against nature.
393
00:23:51,870 --> 00:23:54,670
The male was biologically
designed to spread his seed.
394
00:23:54,832 --> 00:23:56,432
You're gonna piss off
the seeds, man!

395
00:23:56,542 --> 00:23:58,702
You're gonna...
It goes against science!
396
00:23:58,837 --> 00:24:00,077
You want to be the guy
who goes against science?
397
00:24:02,006 --> 00:24:03,326
And two?
398
00:24:03,424 --> 00:24:05,144
Two... are you
out of your fucking mind?
399
00:24:05,260 --> 00:24:06,860
You're the guy
who can't finish a sandwich!
400
00:24:06,970 --> 00:24:08,490
You think you can go
forty days?
401
00:24:08,597 --> 00:24:11,517
Four... You...
This isn't normal!
402
00:24:14,227 --> 00:24:18,147
- She got engaged, Ryan.
403
00:24:18,358 --> 00:24:21,478
Nicole got engaged.
404
00:24:21,611 --> 00:24:22,891
Well...
405
00:24:25,073 --> 00:24:28,673
I knew that. I knew that.
l... I didn't tell you...
406
00:24:28,869 --> 00:24:29,989
just because I thought
you'd get pissed off.
407
00:24:30,078 --> 00:24:31,158
I'm sorry.
I should have told you.

408
00:24:31,246 --> 00:24:32,486
I had to hear it
from the bagel guy!
409
00:24:32,581 --> 00:24:34,861
- Does that guy know everything?
- You should have told me!
410
00:24:35,001 --> 00:24:36,721
I know that. I completely
should have told you.
411
00:24:36,836 --> 00:24:39,996
I'm sorry. Just explain this
to me, though, all right?
412
00:24:40,130 --> 00:24:44,690
Nicole gets engaged, you decide
to take a vow of abstinence.
413
00:24:44,927 --> 00:24:47,247
Haven't you gotten to the point
where you need to take a break?
414
00:24:47,389 --> 00:24:52,109
Yes! Look, Matt,
I swear off girls once a week.
415
00:24:52,310 --> 00:24:54,230
Then, before you know it,
it's morning.
416
00:24:54,354 --> 00:24:55,554
That's part of the game.
417
00:24:55,648 --> 00:24:57,928
Did your brother put you
up to this or something?
418
00:24:58,067 --> 00:25:00,267
You know what? He's about
as supportive as you are.
419
00:25:00,403 --> 00:25:03,123
What do you care anyway? This
doesn't affect you in any way.

420
00:25:05,450 --> 00:25:07,930
You...
421
00:25:08,077 --> 00:25:10,357
This affects everyone.
422
00:25:10,497 --> 00:25:12,177
Right now,
the pot is at two hundred.
423
00:25:12,290 --> 00:25:14,770
It's a minimum bet of $50
a day, which goes into the pot.
424
00:25:14,919 --> 00:25:17,159
If your day's the day, you win
the pot, less expenses...
425
00:25:17,295 --> 00:25:19,535
and a bottle of champagne.
426
00:25:19,672 --> 00:25:22,032
If more than one person
bets on the winning day...
427
00:25:22,175 --> 00:25:23,815
they split the pot
according to the percentage...
428
00:25:23,927 --> 00:25:26,687
of the day's total bets
that have been placed.
429
00:25:26,848 --> 00:25:29,568
I go forty days without sex
all the time.
430
00:25:29,726 --> 00:25:31,686
But, dude, you spank it.
431
00:25:31,811 --> 00:25:32,891
- No jerkin' off?
- True.
432
00:25:32,979 --> 00:25:35,139
Yeah. That's why
my money's on today.

433
00:25:35,273 --> 00:25:37,233
There are two things
to bet on...
434
00:25:37,358 --> 00:25:41,118
one...
will it be with some girl?
435
00:25:41,321 --> 00:25:47,521
Two... will it be some lonely
night down the stretch? Pbbt.
436
00:25:49,830 --> 00:25:53,230
How will we know that, exactly?
437
00:25:53,417 --> 00:25:56,377
Well, I can't tell you
everything...
438
00:25:56,546 --> 00:25:59,466
but I can tell you that
there is somebody on the inside.
439
00:25:59,632 --> 00:26:01,112
Yep. Like Ryan.
440
00:26:01,218 --> 00:26:02,498
OK, so Matt
doesn't know anything?
441
00:26:02,594 --> 00:26:05,034
No, no, no, no.
442
00:26:05,180 --> 00:26:08,620
That is very important... key.
443
00:26:08,976 --> 00:26:12,176
This is great.
I mean, this is crazy great.
444
00:26:12,354 --> 00:26:15,914
Everything is so much simpler
when there's no sex involved.
445
00:26:16,108 --> 00:26:18,908
I think this is the best thing

that's ever happened to me.

446
00:26:19,070 --> 00:26:21,070
You're starting to feel it,
aren't you?
447
00:26:21,197 --> 00:26:22,957
What?
448
00:26:23,075 --> 00:26:26,355
The abstinence... it's starting
to get under your skin.
449
00:26:26,537 --> 00:26:29,937
No. Not at all. I'm fine.
450
00:26:31,292 --> 00:26:34,852
You know what I gave up
for Lent?
451
00:26:35,045 --> 00:26:38,845
Meat. Why don't you try
something like that?
452
00:26:39,050 --> 00:26:41,170
Trust me.
Celibacy takes years...
453
00:26:41,302 --> 00:26:43,382
of commitment, character,
and discipline...
454
00:26:43,512 --> 00:26:45,872
which, quite frankly,
are not your best traits.
455
00:26:46,016 --> 00:26:48,376
You think you're the only one
with a little willpower?
456
00:26:48,518 --> 00:26:50,358
A little willpower?
457
00:26:50,478 --> 00:26:52,438
If you can do this,
I can do this.
458

00:26:52,564 --> 00:26:54,844

You have no idea.
459
00:26:54,983 --> 00:26:56,383
What is so hard
about forty days?
460
00:26:56,443 --> 00:26:57,563
They're guys.
461
00:26:57,653 --> 00:27:00,413
To them, forty minutes
is like an eternity.
462
00:27:00,573 --> 00:27:01,653
They're like animals.
463
00:27:01,741 --> 00:27:04,741
Their entire lives
revolve around their penises.
464
00:27:04,910 --> 00:27:07,030
How many days
do you think he'll last?
465
00:27:07,122 --> 00:27:10,882
Days?
Mm-mmm, girl. Watch this.
466
00:27:11,084 --> 00:27:15,044
Uh-oh.
467
00:27:15,255 --> 00:27:16,375
You are so bad.
468
00:27:28,645 --> 00:27:30,925
- Hi.
- Hi.
469
00:27:32,648 --> 00:27:35,848
Did you, um, do these layouts?
470
00:27:36,027 --> 00:27:38,387
I helped on them, kind of.
471
00:27:41,575 --> 00:27:43,335
These are amazing.

472
00:27:43,452 --> 00:27:46,732
Thanks.
473
00:27:46,914 --> 00:27:51,314
You're like this
totally amazing layout guy.
474
00:27:51,544 --> 00:27:54,664
Something's happening.
Behind me.
475
00:27:57,759 --> 00:28:00,279
- OK, come here.
- Oh, no.
476
00:28:02,223 --> 00:28:05,423
Hey, I have
a big layout problem.
477
00:28:07,769 --> 00:28:09,929
You do?
478
00:28:10,063 --> 00:28:11,743
Can you keep a secret?
479
00:28:11,858 --> 00:28:13,818
Yeah.
480
00:28:17,072 --> 00:28:18,592
Oh, goodness.
481
00:28:20,034 --> 00:28:23,914
I have this tattoo
of a butterfly...
482
00:28:24,121 --> 00:28:26,081
on the inside of my thigh.
483
00:28:26,206 --> 00:28:28,086
Yes, you do.
484
00:28:28,209 --> 00:28:30,449
And I want to get
something on the other side...
485

00:28:30,585 --> 00:28:33,425

but, um, I don't know
what to get.
486
00:28:33,589 --> 00:28:36,509
Any ideas?
487
00:28:36,676 --> 00:28:38,076
I don't know.
488
00:28:38,178 --> 00:28:40,178
I was thinking about...
489
00:28:40,305 --> 00:28:42,025
like a cute little pussycat
or something.
490
00:28:42,140 --> 00:28:44,780
Do you like pussy... cats, Matt?
491
00:28:44,935 --> 00:28:46,455
Yeah.
492
00:28:46,562 --> 00:28:48,522
'Cause if you're not
doing anything later...
493
00:28:48,647 --> 00:28:50,927
you should come over
and help me pick one out.
494
00:28:52,234 --> 00:28:54,314
I can't.
I mean, we can't...
495
00:28:54,445 --> 00:28:57,325
because pussycats
are mean to butterflies.
496
00:28:57,490 --> 00:28:59,290
They don't like them.
They dislike them very much...
497
00:28:59,409 --> 00:29:01,009
and hit them with their paws...
498
00:29:01,119 --> 00:29:02,519

and it hurts
the little butterfly.
499
00:29:02,620 --> 00:29:06,620
- Right.
- Yeah.
500
00:29:06,832 --> 00:29:10,232
Well, OK,
if you change your mind...
501
00:29:13,173 --> 00:29:15,533
Did she just Xerox her ass?
502
00:29:15,676 --> 00:29:18,196
- What?
- Get off me!
503
00:29:18,346 --> 00:29:21,626
Give me a call, OK?
504
00:29:32,360 --> 00:29:35,000
This is a photocopy
of Candy's ass?
505
00:29:36,740 --> 00:29:38,020
Yep.
506
00:29:38,117 --> 00:29:39,957
You're gonna call her, right?
507
00:29:42,120 --> 00:29:44,280
Obviously,
you're gonna call her.
508
00:29:44,415 --> 00:29:47,695
No.
I'm not gonna call her.
509
00:29:50,297 --> 00:29:54,017
Ha ha! As soon as you don't
want it, they can smell it.
510
00:29:54,218 --> 00:29:57,578
She photocopied her ass.
She photocopied her own ass.
511

00:29:57,763 --> 00:29:58,883

You're doing a lot of laundry
lately.
512
00:29:58,972 --> 00:30:00,252
Didn't you just do it
last week?
513
00:30:00,307 --> 00:30:02,147
Just keeping it clean.
514
00:30:05,688 --> 00:30:06,808
Who is she?
515
00:30:09,192 --> 00:30:10,792
Look, I'm not gonna
sit in my room...
516
00:30:10,902 --> 00:30:12,462
and build models
for the next forty days.
517
00:30:12,570 --> 00:30:15,850
- Oh, you like her!
- It's... it's not that.
518
00:30:16,032 --> 00:30:17,712
No, no, no! Have a nice time.
519
00:30:18,076 --> 00:30:21,636
# Basically probability #
520
00:30:21,831 --> 00:30:25,111
# Says that things
gonna start with me #
521
00:30:25,293 --> 00:30:27,613
# It's been so long #
522
00:30:27,753 --> 00:30:30,273
# On my shelf #
523
00:30:33,426 --> 00:30:38,266
# Train comes,
I don't know its destination #
524
00:30:40,142 --> 00:30:45,822

# It's a one-way ticket

to a bad, bad situation #
525
00:30:46,107 --> 00:30:47,747
Busted.
526
00:30:47,858 --> 00:30:50,738
# Train comes,
I don't know... #
527
00:30:50,904 --> 00:30:52,264
- Yeah.
528
00:30:54,532 --> 00:30:56,772
I thought I should tell you
I can speak just fine.
529
00:31:02,207 --> 00:31:03,567
They were all out of flowers.
530
00:31:03,667 --> 00:31:06,067
Yeah. That's cute.
531
00:31:06,211 --> 00:31:08,891
I'm Matt. Officially.
532
00:31:09,048 --> 00:31:10,488
Officially Matt.
533
00:31:10,591 --> 00:31:13,471
Officially Erica.
534
00:31:13,636 --> 00:31:15,036
Officially.
535
00:31:15,138 --> 00:31:17,378
So, you normally do
your laundry on Friday nights?
536
00:31:17,515 --> 00:31:19,475
- Yeah. It's my new thing.
- New thing?
537
00:31:19,600 --> 00:31:24,360
Well, there was a party...
538

00:31:26,024 --> 00:31:27,824

Don't you ever feel like
you just keep meeting...
539
00:31:27,901 --> 00:31:30,581
the same exact people
over and over?
540
00:31:30,738 --> 00:31:32,938
Like people that went
to this kind of college...
541
00:31:33,074 --> 00:31:34,834
And now work
that kind of job, right?
542
00:31:34,951 --> 00:31:36,071
Yeah.
543
00:31:38,371 --> 00:31:40,651
I want to have a party
with a list at the door...
544
00:31:40,748 --> 00:31:42,628
of all my friends
and friends of friends...
545
00:31:42,751 --> 00:31:44,631
and if you're on that list...
546
00:31:44,753 --> 00:31:46,193
or you know somebody
on that list...
547
00:31:46,296 --> 00:31:47,976
then you cannot come in.
548
00:31:49,717 --> 00:31:53,237
How do you know
I'm not on that list?
549
00:31:53,428 --> 00:31:55,428
Nobody on that list
would have talked to me...
550
00:31:55,555 --> 00:31:57,115
like you did last week.

551
00:31:57,224 --> 00:31:58,864
Or not talked to me.
552
00:31:58,976 --> 00:32:00,856
Fair enough, fair enough.
553
00:32:04,482 --> 00:32:07,602
So, what do you do
for laundry money?
554
00:32:07,777 --> 00:32:10,177
I'm a cyber nanny.
555
00:32:10,322 --> 00:32:12,802
What... what's that?
556
00:32:12,950 --> 00:32:15,470
I spend all day looking
for pornography on the web.
557
00:32:15,619 --> 00:32:18,019
All right, say you have
a ten-year-old kid...
558
00:32:18,163 --> 00:32:20,883
with an iMac and a browser, and
she searches "Girlfriends"...
559
00:32:21,041 --> 00:32:23,361
and then gets
lesbian mud wrestling.
560
00:32:23,503 --> 00:32:26,543
- Probably not the best thing.
- But you can't avoid it.
561
00:32:26,714 --> 00:32:28,514
Like today,
I ran a search for "sandbox"...
562
00:32:28,633 --> 00:32:30,793
and got "eat my box"...
563
00:32:30,927 --> 00:32:33,047
"Sandy's hot box"...
564

00:32:33,180 --> 00:32:35,820

and my favorite,
"vagina beach."
565
00:32:35,974 --> 00:32:41,374
My job is to find the site
and block it out.
566
00:32:41,647 --> 00:32:44,727
So, you have to look at
these sex sites all day long?
567
00:32:44,900 --> 00:32:46,860
Yeah. All day.
568
00:32:48,863 --> 00:32:50,063
Drive you crazy after a while?
569
00:32:50,156 --> 00:32:51,596
Yeah.
Some days I think...
570
00:32:51,699 --> 00:32:53,619
that if I have to look
at another blowjob I'll scream.
571
00:32:53,743 --> 00:32:57,543
God, yes.
Same thing happens to me.
572
00:33:02,001 --> 00:33:02,241
What, you're going
on a date with her?
573
00:33:02,252 --> 00:33:03,732
What, you're going
on a date with her?
574
00:33:03,837 --> 00:33:06,477
Isn't that kind of getting
in the way of your thing?
575
00:33:06,632 --> 00:33:09,712
- No, not at all.
- So you're not into her?
576
00:33:09,886 --> 00:33:11,286
Oh, I'm totally into her.

577
00:33:11,345 --> 00:33:12,665
So how can you
not want to fuck her?
578
00:33:12,763 --> 00:33:14,483
Listen, you haven't heard
a word I said.
579
00:33:14,598 --> 00:33:18,318
It's perfect the way it is,
and she's amazing...
580
00:33:18,520 --> 00:33:19,680
and we are
totally connecting...
581
00:33:19,771 --> 00:33:22,691
and it's not a sexual thing,
not for either of us.
582
00:33:22,857 --> 00:33:25,377
Dude, you've got to tell her.
Seriously.
583
00:33:25,527 --> 00:33:27,807
You can pass off two dates
without a kiss as old-fashioned.
584
00:33:27,946 --> 00:33:29,186
You go three,
and you're a homo.
585
00:33:30,825 --> 00:33:33,305
Yeah, yeah, I can see that.
586
00:33:33,452 --> 00:33:35,852
Just got off the phone
with the guy.
587
00:33:35,996 --> 00:33:38,756
There's a preliminary report...
a date happening on Thursday.
588
00:33:38,917 --> 00:33:41,637
- What? Different girl?
- Same girl. Different date.

589
00:33:41,794 --> 00:33:46,114
He is taking her on... the bus.
590
00:33:47,884 --> 00:33:49,444
On the bus where?
591
00:33:50,888 --> 00:33:54,608
Nowhere. That's the point.
592
00:33:54,808 --> 00:33:58,008
He just gets on the bus
and goes around.
593
00:33:58,188 --> 00:34:00,428
Mmm.
594
00:34:02,900 --> 00:34:03,980
If you want to get laid...
595
00:34:04,069 --> 00:34:06,109
you take a chick
to a fancy restaurant.
596
00:34:06,238 --> 00:34:07,678
But if you really like her...
597
00:34:07,781 --> 00:34:09,301
you take her
to your secret place.
598
00:34:09,407 --> 00:34:10,927
That's the bus for Matt.
599
00:34:11,034 --> 00:34:13,234
Yeah.
Mine's the post office.
600
00:34:13,369 --> 00:34:15,329
I don't understand.
So he's gonna get laid?
601
00:34:15,456 --> 00:34:17,056
- Why ask me questions?
- I'll take Thursday.
602
00:34:17,167 --> 00:34:19,447

I like to take girls there,

and I say, "Let's go postal."
603
00:34:19,585 --> 00:34:21,225
- Shut up!
- Shut up!
604
00:34:26,342 --> 00:34:28,062
Are you gonna be OK
with this guy?
605
00:34:28,177 --> 00:34:29,657
Yeah. He's great.
606
00:34:29,763 --> 00:34:33,163
- I'll be waiting up for you.
- No, you won't.
607
00:34:33,350 --> 00:34:34,470
Oh, really?
608
00:34:34,559 --> 00:34:36,319
If I bring this guy home
tonight...
609
00:34:36,437 --> 00:34:38,677
you better make yourself scarce,
and I'm not joking, Sam.
610
00:34:38,772 --> 00:34:41,572
- OK. Bye.
- Bye.
611
00:34:48,116 --> 00:34:51,796
# I remember when I found out
about chemistry #
612
00:34:51,953 --> 00:34:54,913
# It was a long, long way
from here #
613
00:34:55,082 --> 00:34:57,242
# I was old enough
to want it #
614
00:34:57,375 --> 00:34:59,895
# But younger
than I wanted to be #

615
00:35:00,045 --> 00:35:03,405
# Suddenly,
my mission was clear #
616
00:35:03,590 --> 00:35:07,470
# So for a while
I conducted experiments #
617
00:35:07,679 --> 00:35:10,839
# And I was amazed
by the things I learned #
618
00:35:10,974 --> 00:35:13,614
# From the fine, fine girls #
619
00:35:13,769 --> 00:35:15,449
# Nothing but
good intentions #
620
00:35:15,562 --> 00:35:19,922
# And a bad tendency
to get burned #
621
00:35:20,151 --> 00:35:23,951
# Ahh, all about chemistry #
622
00:35:24,155 --> 00:35:27,755
# Won't you show me
everything you know? #
623
00:35:27,950 --> 00:35:31,270
# Ahh,
wonder what you'd do to me #
624
00:35:31,453 --> 00:35:33,773
- There you go!
- Ha! All right!
625
00:35:33,915 --> 00:35:35,835
Hmm. Told you.
626
00:35:35,958 --> 00:35:37,798
So, did any other guys
ever take you on a bus?
627
00:35:37,918 --> 00:35:40,238

Well, there...
628
00:35:40,338 --> 00:35:43,778
there was a guy
who got us kicked off a bus...
629
00:35:43,967 --> 00:35:46,207
and another guy
who tried to steal a bus...
630
00:35:46,345 --> 00:35:49,145
and then the most recent guy
I dated...
631
00:35:49,306 --> 00:35:53,266
went through a phase where he
actually thought he was a bus.
632
00:35:56,105 --> 00:35:58,465
Where do you find guys
like that?
633
00:35:58,607 --> 00:36:02,167
I don't. I don't.
They just...
634
00:36:02,362 --> 00:36:03,682
They always find me.
635
00:36:03,780 --> 00:36:05,460
They always find me.
636
00:36:06,824 --> 00:36:09,424
What about you? Any criminal
records, addictions...
637
00:36:09,578 --> 00:36:11,458
or weird little secrets
I should know about right now?
638
00:36:11,580 --> 00:36:13,820
No.
639
00:36:13,958 --> 00:36:17,438
Yeah. I didn't think so.
640
00:36:29,724 --> 00:36:31,684

You're pretty up-front

about yourself.
641
00:36:31,810 --> 00:36:35,010
I have no reason
not to be honest, I guess.
642
00:36:35,189 --> 00:36:38,029
Yeah. It always catches up
to you if you're not.
643
00:36:38,192 --> 00:36:40,152
Yeah.
That's the way it is with me.
644
00:36:40,277 --> 00:36:42,037
I mean, was with me.
645
00:36:42,155 --> 00:36:46,555
Back in my more youthful,
wasted, younger days.
646
00:36:46,784 --> 00:36:48,624
This is me.
647
00:36:51,290 --> 00:36:54,050
I've never had so much fun
on a bus before.
648
00:36:55,627 --> 00:36:56,747
Me, too.
649
00:37:12,270 --> 00:37:14,310
Good night.
650
00:37:16,566 --> 00:37:18,686
Good night.
651
00:37:18,819 --> 00:37:21,819
I'll... Unh! Whoa! Aah!
652
00:37:21,990 --> 00:37:25,990
- Ow.
- W-watch that.
653
00:37:26,202 --> 00:37:29,562
- I'll talk to you soon, OK?

- OK.
654
00:37:29,747 --> 00:37:31,787
Very soon. Like tomorrow.
I'll give you a call.
655
00:37:31,917 --> 00:37:34,277
- Great.
- Bye!
656
00:37:34,419 --> 00:37:36,219
Bye.
657
00:37:38,340 --> 00:37:43,700
- Like, a high five?
- No. More like a "Gimme five."
658
00:37:43,971 --> 00:37:46,011
He's got a girlfriend.
659
00:37:46,139 --> 00:37:48,659
Some guys are just different
about this stuff, you know.
660
00:37:48,809 --> 00:37:52,969
Mm-hmm. Gay is different
to some people.
661
00:37:53,148 --> 00:37:56,188
Well, I trust him.
That means a lot.
662
00:37:56,359 --> 00:37:58,559
Is this anything like
the last guy you trusted...
663
00:37:58,653 --> 00:38:01,653
who stole half your jewelry
and sold it on eBay?
664
00:38:01,824 --> 00:38:04,824
Apparently, speed
is a very expensive drug, Sam.
665
00:38:04,993 --> 00:38:06,793
Dude, you are so gone.
666

00:38:06,912 --> 00:38:08,992

No, I love hanging out
with him. He's amazing.
667
00:38:09,123 --> 00:38:11,483
I'm treated like an equal,
and we're connecting...
668
00:38:11,625 --> 00:38:13,665
- It sucks, doesn't it?
- Yeah, it does.
669
00:38:13,795 --> 00:38:15,595
It totally sucks.
670
00:38:15,672 --> 00:38:17,232
Why doesn't he just
want to have sex with me?
671
00:38:17,757 --> 00:38:19,637
So, how did it go last night,
champ?
672
00:38:19,759 --> 00:38:21,359
What?
673
00:38:21,469 --> 00:38:23,629
With your date.
Did you hit that or what?
674
00:38:23,764 --> 00:38:25,044
What... what...
675
00:38:26,391 --> 00:38:28,511
- What are you talking about?
676
00:38:28,644 --> 00:38:31,524
Nothing.
Whoo. That was weird.
677
00:38:31,689 --> 00:38:33,649
No more drugs pour moi.
678
00:38:35,984 --> 00:38:37,784
What the fuck is going on?
679
00:38:42,241 --> 00:38:44,161

You guys put up

a web page about me?
680
00:38:44,285 --> 00:38:46,765
Web page? Please.
Be more insulting, man.
681
00:38:46,913 --> 00:38:49,633
This is a complicated
betting pool.
682
00:38:51,000 --> 00:38:52,080
You guys can't make this public.
683
00:38:52,169 --> 00:38:56,409
This is not something that
I want everyone to know about.
684
00:38:56,633 --> 00:38:58,553
It's a little too late, dude.
685
00:38:58,676 --> 00:39:03,236
Today's bets. Originally,
the spread favored day 26...
686
00:39:03,472 --> 00:39:05,912
but with all the dating action
in Mattland these days...
687
00:39:06,059 --> 00:39:08,019
I'm gonna recommend day 23.
688
00:39:09,396 --> 00:39:10,676
Someone just placed
another bet.
689
00:39:10,773 --> 00:39:13,613
I had one come in all the way
from Bangladesh.
690
00:39:13,776 --> 00:39:17,136
Little Haji
just loves to roll the dice.
691
00:39:17,322 --> 00:39:19,122
You guys have advertisers?
692

00:39:19,240 --> 00:39:22,720

A friend of mine
started up a business...
693
00:39:22,910 --> 00:39:24,670
and I gave him a good price.
694
00:39:24,787 --> 00:39:26,307
A porn site!
695
00:39:29,084 --> 00:39:30,604
Oh, shit!
696
00:39:39,261 --> 00:39:41,661
# You fell down #
697
00:39:41,764 --> 00:39:45,564
# Dropped it in water #
698
00:39:45,768 --> 00:39:48,128
Hey! You know where
Erica Sutton is?
699
00:39:48,271 --> 00:39:50,151
- Yeah. She's...
- Where?
700
00:39:50,273 --> 00:39:52,873
You're that guy.
The abstinence guy.
701
00:39:53,027 --> 00:39:54,787
Hey, it's the abstinence guy!
702
00:40:02,787 --> 00:40:04,667
What is this, some kind
of a bet not to sleep with me?
703
00:40:04,788 --> 00:40:06,548
No, this isn't a bet.
Let me explain.
704
00:40:06,624 --> 00:40:08,304
Don't explain.
You don't have to.
705
00:40:08,417 --> 00:40:11,817

I just read about it

over the fucking internet.
706
00:40:12,005 --> 00:40:14,965
Erica! Erica, I should have
told you about this.
707
00:40:15,132 --> 00:40:17,292
I thought you'd think
I was a freak. I'm sorry.
708
00:40:17,427 --> 00:40:19,627
I can't believe the load of
bullshit that you fed to me...
709
00:40:19,763 --> 00:40:20,843
about telling the damn truth.
710
00:40:20,931 --> 00:40:23,571
l... I did this for myself.
711
00:40:23,726 --> 00:40:26,366
I didn't think anybody else
knew about it. I swear to God.
712
00:40:26,520 --> 00:40:29,160
Plus, if I told you,
you'd think I was a sex addict.
713
00:40:29,314 --> 00:40:30,434
- Are you?
- No!
714
00:40:30,525 --> 00:40:31,965
Then what is the point?
715
00:40:32,068 --> 00:40:34,028
What is the point
of this whole thing?
716
00:40:34,153 --> 00:40:37,233
I just wanted to see
what it would be like...
717
00:40:37,407 --> 00:40:39,407
without all the shit
that sex brings to the picture.

718
00:40:39,534 --> 00:40:41,734
Oh, so I'm like
some science experiment?
719
00:40:41,828 --> 00:40:44,988
No! l... Look, I was going
through a really rough time...
720
00:40:45,165 --> 00:40:46,765
and I just wanted to stop.
721
00:40:46,875 --> 00:40:48,795
I wanted to stop
thinking about sex.
722
00:40:48,919 --> 00:40:50,399
Not that I was thinking
about sex all the time...
723
00:40:50,504 --> 00:40:53,824
I just wanted to stop.
724
00:40:54,008 --> 00:40:57,688
And the thing is, it's working.
It's really working.
725
00:40:57,846 --> 00:40:59,846
I'm glad it's working
for one of us.
726
00:41:06,397 --> 00:41:10,037
You stupid, stupid,
silly little person!
727
00:41:10,192 --> 00:41:12,392
Why did you have to go
and tell everyone?
728
00:41:12,528 --> 00:41:15,248
Look, if you're so ashamed,
maybe you shouldn't be doing it.
729
00:41:15,406 --> 00:41:18,406
I'm not ashamed!
I'm embarrassed!
730
00:41:18,576 --> 00:41:21,056

Then quit, Matt. Just quit.

731
00:41:21,204 --> 00:41:23,044
Nobody thinks
you'll finish this thing.
732
00:41:23,164 --> 00:41:24,604
I'm not fucking quitting.
733
00:41:24,707 --> 00:41:29,507
Everything was going great
until you had to...
734
00:41:29,755 --> 00:41:31,915
I stopped having sex...
735
00:41:32,049 --> 00:41:33,849
I'm totally
falling for Erica...
736
00:41:33,968 --> 00:41:36,248
and I'm finally over Nicole.
737
00:41:36,387 --> 00:41:37,467
You really think
you're over her?
738
00:41:37,555 --> 00:41:40,155
Fuck, yeah! Bitch.
739
00:41:40,308 --> 00:41:44,668
Hmm. I ran into her
and her fianc last night.
740
00:41:50,819 --> 00:41:52,979
What was he like?
741
00:41:54,824 --> 00:41:57,464
He... he parties
with a friend of mine.
742
00:41:57,575 --> 00:41:59,375
Apparently, the dude
works late every night.
743
00:41:59,496 --> 00:42:00,536
That's what I heard.

744
00:42:02,707 --> 00:42:03,787
So?
745
00:42:03,874 --> 00:42:07,074
He works late every night...
a different girl every night.
746
00:42:07,253 --> 00:42:08,973
Not that
it should matter to you.
747
00:42:09,089 --> 00:42:11,089
No.
Why would it matter to me?
748
00:42:11,216 --> 00:42:12,856
Yeah.
749
00:42:17,556 --> 00:42:19,956
My wife and I have
been married for eight years.
750
00:42:20,100 --> 00:42:22,860
I love her very much.
751
00:42:23,020 --> 00:42:27,260
I... consider myself
a lucky person.
752
00:42:27,483 --> 00:42:29,803
That being said...
753
00:42:29,944 --> 00:42:31,704
this woman...
754
00:42:31,821 --> 00:42:35,941
does not put out at all.
755
00:42:36,117 --> 00:42:38,037
I mean, at all.
756
00:42:38,161 --> 00:42:40,481
I mean, we used to have sex
everywhere.
757

00:42:40,622 --> 00:42:43,182

We used to have sex
in this office.
758
00:42:43,334 --> 00:42:47,374
We had sex on this floor.
We had sex on this desk.
759
00:42:47,588 --> 00:42:50,788
- On that chair.
- OK. I get it, I get it.
760
00:42:50,966 --> 00:42:53,086
But now, I have
to practically beg for it.
761
00:42:53,219 --> 00:42:56,899
I mean, it was kind of hot
for the first eight months.
762
00:42:57,098 --> 00:42:59,058
The chasing after her...
763
00:42:59,183 --> 00:43:03,143
surprising her
with my sexy new underwear.
764
00:43:03,355 --> 00:43:08,035
But now,
I feel a little like a...
765
00:43:08,277 --> 00:43:10,517
like I'm a pervert.
766
00:43:12,866 --> 00:43:15,346
I heard about the vow...
767
00:43:15,492 --> 00:43:17,372
and I think it's genius.
768
00:43:17,495 --> 00:43:19,375
Thanks.
769
00:43:19,497 --> 00:43:20,937
I mean, this is
the perfect way for me...
770

00:43:21,041 --> 00:43:23,681

to regain the power
in my relationship.
771
00:43:23,835 --> 00:43:25,235
See, I take the vow.
772
00:43:25,338 --> 00:43:28,898
I tell her I'm gonna do without
for a few months.
773
00:43:29,091 --> 00:43:32,451
I bet in half the time she's
going to be begging for it.
774
00:43:32,636 --> 00:43:33,836
Don't you think?
What do you think?
775
00:43:33,930 --> 00:43:37,730
I think you don't know what
you're getting yourself into.
776
00:43:42,855 --> 00:43:46,175
Hey, put that away. Books
get you in trouble around here.
777
00:43:46,360 --> 00:43:49,000
- I can't work right now.
- So go home.
778
00:43:49,154 --> 00:43:52,434
- I need the money.
- So work.
779
00:43:52,616 --> 00:43:54,776
It all reminds me of Matt.
780
00:43:54,911 --> 00:43:58,631
Even "donkey lovers"?
781
00:44:01,542 --> 00:44:04,022
Call him or leave.
You're bugging me.
782
00:44:05,880 --> 00:44:09,120
# A strange condition #

783
00:44:09,301 --> 00:44:12,901
# A daily prison #
784
00:44:13,055 --> 00:44:15,455
# You've got me
out of my head #
785
00:44:15,600 --> 00:44:20,160
# And I don't know
what I came for #
786
00:44:22,731 --> 00:44:25,811
# Send me money, baby #
787
00:44:25,985 --> 00:44:29,705
# Do not leave out a wage #
788
00:44:29,906 --> 00:44:33,106
# You know
you're the best thing #
789
00:44:33,242 --> 00:44:36,122
# In the corner
of this place #
790
00:44:36,288 --> 00:44:39,928
# And I want you to know #
791
00:44:40,126 --> 00:44:42,726
- How's the chicken?
- Good.
792
00:44:46,006 --> 00:44:50,246
# This strange condition #
793
00:44:50,470 --> 00:44:52,390
Why is this so weird?
794
00:44:54,933 --> 00:44:56,933
If I told you, "Don't think
about the color red..."
795
00:44:57,060 --> 00:44:58,180
what would you think about?
796
00:45:00,106 --> 00:45:01,186

Sex.
797
00:45:02,900 --> 00:45:04,820
OK, so we're both sitting here
thinking about sex...
798
00:45:04,943 --> 00:45:06,383
because
we can't think about sex...
799
00:45:06,488 --> 00:45:07,928
because
we can't talk about sex...
800
00:45:08,031 --> 00:45:10,911
and we certainly cannot
have sex.
801
00:45:11,075 --> 00:45:14,435
It's like,
so what are we doing here?
802
00:45:14,621 --> 00:45:17,141
You know, if I didn't have
this vow thing...
803
00:45:17,290 --> 00:45:19,050
I'd kiss you right now.
804
00:45:27,010 --> 00:45:29,690
- Thanks.
- Thanks.
805
00:45:40,815 --> 00:45:42,175
You OK?
806
00:45:42,276 --> 00:45:44,396
I'm fine.
807
00:45:44,527 --> 00:45:46,967
- Are you sure?
- I'll be right back.
808
00:45:47,114 --> 00:45:49,874
- Are you...
- Yeah.
809

00:46:01,171 --> 00:46:02,531

Sir! Sir!
810
00:46:03,881 --> 00:46:06,681
Whoa! Whoa! Whoa! Whoa!
811
00:46:06,843 --> 00:46:08,603
Aah!
812
00:46:08,720 --> 00:46:12,520
- Aah! Aah!
813
00:46:12,683 --> 00:46:16,723
Oh! Aah! I'm OK.
814
00:46:19,023 --> 00:46:21,423
Thank you. Thank you.
I'm OK. Thank you.
815
00:46:21,568 --> 00:46:22,688
- Matt.
- I'm OK.
816
00:46:24,946 --> 00:46:26,546
Hi.
817
00:46:26,656 --> 00:46:28,976
Nicole. How are you?
818
00:46:29,117 --> 00:46:32,597
Well, better than you
at the moment.
819
00:46:32,787 --> 00:46:36,227
- Yeah. Yeah.
820
00:46:38,001 --> 00:46:41,361
This is, um, this is...
821
00:46:41,546 --> 00:46:42,946
This is Erica.
822
00:46:43,049 --> 00:46:44,689
Nicole.
823
00:46:44,800 --> 00:46:48,600

David Brokaw. Hi.

824
00:46:48,805 --> 00:46:51,405
I'm Matt. I'm Matt.
825
00:46:51,559 --> 00:46:54,559
Oh, yes. Yes, of course.
826
00:46:54,728 --> 00:46:58,128
Matt, you work at one
of those dot coms, don't you?
827
00:46:58,315 --> 00:47:00,275
Yes. Yes, I do.
828
00:47:00,400 --> 00:47:04,520
David's the youngest
executive vice president...
829
00:47:04,739 --> 00:47:06,579
at Morgan Stanley.
830
00:47:06,699 --> 00:47:08,579
Yeah, well, I'm the youngest...
831
00:47:08,701 --> 00:47:09,781
Yeah, hey,
It's all good, Matt.
832
00:47:09,870 --> 00:47:13,590
Listen, honey, you want
to give it one more try?
833
00:47:13,790 --> 00:47:14,910
It's good to see you.
834
00:47:14,999 --> 00:47:16,719
Yeah, you, too.
835
00:47:20,422 --> 00:47:21,502
Bye.
836
00:47:27,638 --> 00:47:29,878
She's the real reason
you took that vow.
837

00:47:32,102 --> 00:47:34,542

No.
She's just an ex.
838
00:47:36,481 --> 00:47:38,761
The vow is something
completely separate from her.
839
00:47:38,901 --> 00:47:41,381
You're a really bad liar.
840
00:47:41,528 --> 00:47:43,248
I get that a lot.
841
00:47:45,533 --> 00:47:46,733
Look, I know I should've
told you about her.
842
00:47:46,826 --> 00:47:47,946
Yeah, you should've.
843
00:47:48,035 --> 00:47:49,835
But I guess it's hard for you
to get the truth out.
844
00:47:55,460 --> 00:47:56,740
Shit.
845
00:47:59,756 --> 00:48:02,036
Hey, how about I quit the vow?
846
00:48:02,175 --> 00:48:04,135
I mean, honestly,
I don't care about the vow.
847
00:48:04,261 --> 00:48:05,861
Oh, sure, now
St. Matt wants a piece.
848
00:48:05,970 --> 00:48:08,410
- No, that's not it at all.
- You don't want me?
849
00:48:08,557 --> 00:48:11,197
No, of course I want you.
It's just...
850

00:48:14,062 --> 00:48:16,422

I care about the vow, and...
851
00:48:16,566 --> 00:48:19,126
- You do?
- Yeah, I do.
852
00:48:19,278 --> 00:48:21,878
And her?
853
00:48:24,282 --> 00:48:25,402
I don't know.
854
00:48:33,166 --> 00:48:35,806
I'll tell you what.
You want me?
855
00:48:35,962 --> 00:48:37,402
Yeah.
856
00:48:37,505 --> 00:48:39,465
Then finish your stupid vow.
857
00:48:39,590 --> 00:48:40,670
And if you finish it...
858
00:48:40,759 --> 00:48:43,359
then maybe we can talk
about being together. Maybe.
859
00:48:57,944 --> 00:49:01,224
I've given up sex,
because I just...
860
00:49:01,364 --> 00:49:04,084
I just want to connect
with people on a deeper level.
861
00:49:04,241 --> 00:49:05,481
- Really?
- Yeah.
862
00:49:05,577 --> 00:49:06,657
Is it working?
863
00:49:06,744 --> 00:49:09,104
Working?

Of course it's working!

864
00:49:09,205 --> 00:49:13,205
It's like this incredible high.
Can you not feel that?
865
00:49:13,418 --> 00:49:15,858
Just sitting here
talking with you...
866
00:49:16,005 --> 00:49:18,525
I'm mind orgasmic right now.
867
00:49:18,674 --> 00:49:21,074
Mind orgasmic.
868
00:49:21,218 --> 00:49:23,618
Yeah.
869
00:49:23,762 --> 00:49:26,042
Hmm.
870
00:49:34,399 --> 00:49:35,799
Oh, God Ohh
871
00:49:59,677 --> 00:50:00,797
We need to talk.
872
00:50:00,885 --> 00:50:02,085
I can't. I gotta go.
873
00:50:02,179 --> 00:50:04,859
l... I understand
what you're doing, Matt.
874
00:50:05,015 --> 00:50:06,615
- You do?
- Mm-hmm.
875
00:50:06,726 --> 00:50:09,926
Women have been doing this
since, well, forever...
876
00:50:10,104 --> 00:50:12,064
so we know all about the power.
877

00:50:12,189 --> 00:50:14,389

See, us having the power,
that's part of the system...
878
00:50:14,526 --> 00:50:17,086
and by you taking the power,
you're fucking with the system.
879
00:50:17,237 --> 00:50:20,637
And I think you see why
we can't let that happen.
880
00:50:20,824 --> 00:50:23,304
You bet on today.
This is about money.
881
00:50:23,452 --> 00:50:26,292
Ah-ah. Signed and
notarized commitment...
882
00:50:26,455 --> 00:50:28,415
to donate all proceeds
to charity.
883
00:50:28,540 --> 00:50:32,580
So you want to have sex with me
to regain "the power"?
884
00:50:32,795 --> 00:50:35,955
We're willing to do
whatever is necessary...
885
00:50:36,132 --> 00:50:37,572
to get the job done.
886
00:50:37,675 --> 00:50:40,315
Why do you keep saying "we"?
887
00:50:43,807 --> 00:50:45,327
Oh, fuck.
888
00:50:45,434 --> 00:50:49,114
Now, we think that this offer
is more than fair.
889
00:50:49,312 --> 00:50:52,112
Can I talk to you for a second?

890
00:50:52,274 --> 00:50:55,194
- Excuse me. What?
- I don't think I can do this.
891
00:50:55,362 --> 00:50:57,242
Andie, we talked about this
already, OK?
892
00:50:57,363 --> 00:50:58,883
I know, but just look at him.
893
00:50:58,990 --> 00:51:00,350
I mean, he used to be
kind of cute...
894
00:51:00,450 --> 00:51:02,930
but now he's just twitchy.
895
00:51:03,078 --> 00:51:06,638
Shh. It'll be over
in, like, two seconds, OK?
896
00:51:06,832 --> 00:51:09,192
Would you care to join us, hmm?
897
00:51:10,502 --> 00:51:12,782
Mmm.
898
00:51:12,922 --> 00:51:15,202
Oh, God. Not the tongues.
899
00:51:16,717 --> 00:51:18,917
Oh, my God. I gotta go.
900
00:51:25,351 --> 00:51:27,031
Yesterday was fine.
901
00:51:27,144 --> 00:51:29,944
I mean, physically speaking,
I was fine.
902
00:51:30,106 --> 00:51:33,706
But today... I'm not fine.
903
00:51:33,902 --> 00:51:35,262
This morning

at the coffee shop...

904
00:51:35,362 --> 00:51:37,802
they were sponsoring
hot women wearing no bras day.
905
00:51:41,743 --> 00:51:42,823
Whoo.
906
00:51:42,912 --> 00:51:44,272
Hot, hot women wearing no bras?
907
00:51:44,372 --> 00:51:46,212
I mean, like hot, hot women.
908
00:51:46,332 --> 00:51:48,932
There were 48 breasts at
the Cafe Trieste this morning.
909
00:52:07,939 --> 00:52:10,299
# Take a look at me #
910
00:52:10,442 --> 00:52:13,522
I know this phase. It passes.
911
00:52:13,695 --> 00:52:15,655
But why does this
have to happen now?
912
00:52:15,780 --> 00:52:19,020
I mean, yesterday Erica tells
me I have to finish the vow...
913
00:52:19,202 --> 00:52:21,162
and today I'm slammed by sex.
Why?
914
00:52:21,287 --> 00:52:22,767
- Look, you've gone 26 days?
- Mm-hmm.
915
00:52:22,872 --> 00:52:25,152
- That's very admirable.
- Yeah, thanks.
916
00:52:25,249 --> 00:52:26,769
But you can't come

to mom and dad's tonight.

917
00:52:26,876 --> 00:52:29,076
If I don't go, they'll kill me.
918
00:52:29,212 --> 00:52:30,412
You don't want them
to see you like this.
919
00:52:30,505 --> 00:52:32,345
I don't want me
to see me like this...
920
00:52:32,423 --> 00:52:35,023
but if there's one place
I'm safe it's at home, right?
921
00:52:35,176 --> 00:52:37,536
- Mmm.
- Right?
922
00:52:37,846 --> 00:52:40,766
From thy bounty,
through Christ, our lord. Amen.
923
00:52:44,520 --> 00:52:47,320
So, dad, when your hip heals,
will it be like normal?
924
00:52:47,439 --> 00:52:50,399
Yeah, pretty much.
I can golf, ride a bike.
925
00:52:50,568 --> 00:52:51,848
He just has to be careful.
926
00:52:51,945 --> 00:52:54,425
It's amazing
the things you can do now.
927
00:52:54,572 --> 00:52:56,412
You know, I'm part
of a pilot program...
928
00:52:56,533 --> 00:52:57,933
that's tracking
my range of motion.

929
00:52:58,034 --> 00:52:59,114
Really?
930
00:52:59,202 --> 00:53:01,522
Oh, they don't want
to hear about that.
931
00:53:01,663 --> 00:53:03,383
No, no. They want
to see what effect...
932
00:53:03,457 --> 00:53:04,937
the operation's
had on my sex life.
933
00:53:05,042 --> 00:53:06,682
Sorry.
934
00:53:06,794 --> 00:53:08,954
Do we have to talk about this
at dinner?
935
00:53:09,088 --> 00:53:11,368
Bev, we're all adults
here, aren't we?
936
00:53:11,466 --> 00:53:13,506
Isn't sex a God-given
natural part of life?
937
00:53:13,634 --> 00:53:15,154
Don't start, dad.
938
00:53:15,261 --> 00:53:18,581
Why not talk about it? I think
a good sexual appetite...
939
00:53:18,764 --> 00:53:22,484
is a real, normal,
healthy part of being a man.
940
00:53:22,686 --> 00:53:24,966
And a woman.
941
00:53:25,104 --> 00:53:27,224
Who wants more beans?
I do.

942
00:53:27,358 --> 00:53:29,958
They're grown men.
They're old enough to know...
943
00:53:30,110 --> 00:53:32,230
that their mother's machine
is still running hot.
944
00:53:33,447 --> 00:53:35,687
Walter, this isn't the moment.
945
00:53:35,825 --> 00:53:38,345
Oh, no.
Let me show you people.
946
00:53:39,954 --> 00:53:41,874
See...
947
00:53:43,083 --> 00:53:45,003
they sent me this sheet.
948
00:53:47,546 --> 00:53:50,266
A whole bunch
of different positions on it.
949
00:53:50,424 --> 00:53:51,904
I just check off
the ones I can do...
950
00:53:52,009 --> 00:53:53,089
like this one here.
951
00:53:53,176 --> 00:53:56,096
I can do that,
so I check the box.
952
00:53:58,057 --> 00:54:01,177
Hey, here's an old standby.
953
00:54:01,353 --> 00:54:04,353
But, see, I can't do that
because of my hip...
954
00:54:04,522 --> 00:54:06,762
so, you know,
I don't check the box.

955
00:54:06,899 --> 00:54:11,059
Bev, have we ever
tried this before?
956
00:54:11,279 --> 00:54:15,759
Walter, how could you forget
the Maui Hilton?
957
00:54:15,993 --> 00:54:20,353
In the shower.
I nearly killed myself.
958
00:54:20,581 --> 00:54:22,941
Yes.
959
00:54:30,466 --> 00:54:31,746
Damn it.
960
00:54:36,723 --> 00:54:37,883
Surprise inspection.
961
00:54:44,982 --> 00:54:46,382
What the hell is that thing?
962
00:54:48,445 --> 00:54:50,605
It's a special light
that allows me to see...
963
00:54:50,739 --> 00:54:53,579
if any fluids
have been liberated.
964
00:55:15,515 --> 00:55:17,075
Keep up the good work.
965
00:55:43,754 --> 00:55:44,874
Hmm.
966
00:55:47,091 --> 00:55:48,531
Mmm.
967
00:55:50,928 --> 00:55:53,688
Ohh. These are good.
968
00:55:58,311 --> 00:55:59,431

Is...
969
00:56:00,480 --> 00:56:03,200
Is he twisting her nipple?
970
00:56:05,652 --> 00:56:09,012
Jeez, that's an oversight.
I'll fix that.
971
00:56:09,197 --> 00:56:12,397
I know what you mean. I've been
surfing for porn all week.
972
00:56:12,576 --> 00:56:14,736
- What am I doing wrong?
- Huh?
973
00:56:14,870 --> 00:56:17,070
I mean, not only is my wife
not begging for it...
974
00:56:17,205 --> 00:56:19,205
she's not...
975
00:56:19,333 --> 00:56:20,933
I've never seen her so happy.
976
00:56:21,044 --> 00:56:23,764
And today. Did you see it's
the warmest day of the year?
977
00:56:23,921 --> 00:56:25,721
Yeah, it's spring.
978
00:56:25,840 --> 00:56:27,240
It's spring, Goddamn it...
979
00:56:27,342 --> 00:56:29,222
and they're... look at 'em.
They're all wearing...
980
00:56:29,345 --> 00:56:32,065
their little summer dresses.
Just...
981
00:56:32,180 --> 00:56:35,260
Hmm?

982
00:56:35,434 --> 00:56:38,274
What am I supposed to do now,
vow boy, huh?
983
00:56:39,897 --> 00:56:41,337
Fix this.
984
00:56:48,198 --> 00:56:49,278
Damn it!
985
00:56:56,873 --> 00:56:57,993
Come on.
986
00:56:59,209 --> 00:57:02,409
- What's up, dog?
- Hey, what's up, dog?
987
00:57:02,588 --> 00:57:06,108
- What are you doing?
- Just, uh, freshenin' up.
988
00:57:12,348 --> 00:57:15,108
I'm tired of waiting
for things to happen.
989
00:57:15,269 --> 00:57:16,709
And my money's on today.
990
00:57:16,812 --> 00:57:18,612
Yeah, that's great.
So what the fuck is that?
991
00:57:18,730 --> 00:57:21,930
This is what the American
Medical Association...
992
00:57:22,067 --> 00:57:24,787
refers to as... Viagra.
993
00:57:24,945 --> 00:57:27,585
Well, I'm not gonna
let you do that, bro.
994
00:57:27,740 --> 00:57:30,660
Well, you can be bought... bro.

995
00:57:32,620 --> 00:57:33,740
- Yeah.
- Yeah.
996
00:57:42,256 --> 00:57:44,136
Ohh.
997
00:57:44,258 --> 00:57:46,818
Who's that? What's that?
998
00:57:46,970 --> 00:57:50,850
Oh, God, that's that new girl
in tech support.
999
00:57:51,057 --> 00:57:52,937
Did you know
that regular ejaculation...
1000
00:57:53,059 --> 00:57:55,899
is a preventative
against prostate cancer?
1001
00:57:57,355 --> 00:58:01,075
So, is it that
you hate your penis?
1002
00:58:01,276 --> 00:58:04,236
Because, I mean, I personally
feel like that's...
1003
00:58:04,404 --> 00:58:06,204
God, that's one of the best
relationships I have.
1004
00:58:06,280 --> 00:58:09,160
Why do you think they call it
the little head?
1005
00:58:09,284 --> 00:58:10,844
I'll tell you why.
1006
00:58:10,952 --> 00:58:12,832
Because he has ideas.
1007
00:58:19,838 --> 00:58:20,958
l...

1008
00:58:24,092 --> 00:58:26,092
- Nice going, dumb ass.
- What?
1009
00:58:26,220 --> 00:58:27,420
Hey, Jerry.
1010
00:58:28,972 --> 00:58:31,812
Chow mein. New girl in tech.
Very hot.
1011
00:58:31,975 --> 00:58:34,855
Ah... ah... ah. Mmm.
1012
00:58:36,230 --> 00:58:39,030
Ahh. This tastes funny.
1013
00:58:39,150 --> 00:58:42,150
Not bad,
just, you know, funny.
1014
00:58:44,030 --> 00:58:46,990
Ohh. Mmm.
1015
00:58:58,338 --> 00:58:59,418
Hey, Jerry.
1016
00:59:06,345 --> 00:59:08,225
Oh.
1017
00:59:08,348 --> 00:59:09,468
Ohh.
1018
00:59:12,143 --> 00:59:14,703
l... Excuse me.
I have to get...
1019
00:59:16,398 --> 00:59:18,918
- Uh...
- Do you need this?
1020
00:59:19,068 --> 00:59:21,428
- No.
1021
00:59:24,866 --> 00:59:26,786
l... I'm so thirsty.

1022
00:59:26,867 --> 00:59:28,627
- Are you OK?
- Mm-hmm.
1023
00:59:38,881 --> 00:59:40,281
Captain Blueballs.
1024
00:59:40,382 --> 00:59:42,742
Been looking for you
since lunch.
1025
00:59:42,884 --> 00:59:45,764
I was just, uhmaintaining these...
1026
00:59:45,888 --> 00:59:48,248
Yeah.
Matt, look at yourself.
1027
00:59:48,391 --> 00:59:49,671
Your life is shit.
1028
00:59:50,894 --> 00:59:54,094
You're hiding out
In a fuckin' storage room.
1029
00:59:54,230 --> 00:59:56,230
OK, here's how it's gonna go.
1030
01:00:02,781 --> 01:00:04,661
You've already won.
1031
01:00:04,784 --> 01:00:07,904
You've already
proven everyone wrong.
1032
01:00:08,079 --> 01:00:09,839
Now it's serious.
1033
01:00:09,915 --> 01:00:11,235
The pot's
up to eighteen thousand.
1034
01:00:11,333 --> 01:00:13,013
That's a lot of money,
isn't it?

1035
01:00:13,126 --> 01:00:14,686
- It's your vow.
1036
01:00:14,794 --> 01:00:16,554
It should be your money.
1037
01:00:18,340 --> 01:00:19,860
So I'm gonna split it with you.
1038
01:00:19,967 --> 01:00:22,447
That's right.
1039
01:00:22,594 --> 01:00:25,314
And all you have to do
is take the dive.
1040
01:00:26,932 --> 01:00:29,612
Think about it...
nine thousand dollars.
1041
01:00:29,768 --> 01:00:31,208
Nine large.
1042
01:00:32,564 --> 01:00:34,324
Just take this.
1043
01:00:35,942 --> 01:00:39,262
Uh-oh. You like her.
Now we're talkin'.
1044
01:00:39,446 --> 01:00:41,926
- She's something, isn't she?
1045
01:00:42,073 --> 01:00:45,793
Take her into the bathroom
and get on with your life.
1046
01:01:00,344 --> 01:01:02,544
Yes. Yes.
1047
01:01:06,600 --> 01:01:07,680
# Ah #
1048
01:01:07,767 --> 01:01:09,687
No, no, no. No, no.

He can't do this.
1049
01:01:09,812 --> 01:01:11,972
I want to talk to him.
1050
01:01:12,106 --> 01:01:13,586
Matt, don't do it!
1051
01:01:14,859 --> 01:01:16,379
We need you, Matt
1052
01:01:16,486 --> 01:01:19,766
Matt, don't do it
1053
01:01:19,947 --> 01:01:21,267
Think about the little guy,
Matt
1054
01:01:21,366 --> 01:01:22,766
Don't think about that
Think about me
1055
01:01:22,868 --> 01:01:25,188
- Huh? Think about me!
- Matt!
1056
01:01:25,328 --> 01:01:27,448
No, no, no, no.
1057
01:01:27,581 --> 01:01:29,901
Get out of here!
Get out of here!
1058
01:01:30,041 --> 01:01:32,521
Matt, this is important!
I'm going to go in there.
1059
01:01:32,669 --> 01:01:34,309
- I will throw down.
- Come on!
1060
01:01:34,421 --> 01:01:35,781
Yeah. Fire in the hole.
1061
01:01:35,882 --> 01:01:37,002
I'm going to give you
until the count of three.

1062
01:01:37,090 --> 01:01:39,370
Let's rock and roll.
Aah!
1063
01:01:39,510 --> 01:01:40,950
You understand
why I had to do that?
1064
01:02:05,538 --> 01:02:11,378
Aah. Ahh...
1065
01:02:11,670 --> 01:02:13,990
- Jerry?
1066
01:02:14,131 --> 01:02:18,971
Uh, Jerry's not here right now.
May I take a message?
1067
01:02:22,139 --> 01:02:25,739
What about the vow, Jerry?
1068
01:02:25,934 --> 01:02:31,214
I tried. l... I didn't...
I tried. I really...
1069
01:02:38,239 --> 01:02:40,919
It just... it just hit me
all at once.
1070
01:02:41,076 --> 01:02:42,996
I mean, I've jerked off
three times since lunch.
1071
01:02:43,120 --> 01:02:44,880
I still have
this fucking hard-on.
1072
01:02:48,125 --> 01:02:49,965
Way to go, Mr. Anderson.
1073
01:02:50,085 --> 01:02:52,725
Two more, and you break
the company record.
1074
01:02:58,970 --> 01:03:00,330
- Oh.

- Aw.
1075
01:03:00,430 --> 01:03:02,230
Boo.
1076
01:03:04,101 --> 01:03:05,741
What?
1077
01:03:17,489 --> 01:03:19,009
All right.
This is ridiculous.
1078
01:03:19,117 --> 01:03:21,517
- I am going in.
1079
01:03:26,875 --> 01:03:28,715
Ahh. Uhh.
1080
01:03:33,132 --> 01:03:34,292
Where is Matt?
1081
01:03:34,383 --> 01:03:36,503
Um...
1082
01:03:38,512 --> 01:03:39,952
Heh.
1083
01:03:40,056 --> 01:03:42,976
Well, I don't know.
1084
01:03:51,818 --> 01:03:52,898
He didn't do it.
1085
01:03:52,986 --> 01:03:55,226
- Yeah!
1086
01:04:11,172 --> 01:04:12,252
Hi.
1087
01:04:12,340 --> 01:04:14,860
I know
I shouldn't be here...
1088
01:04:15,010 --> 01:04:17,010
but I've been thinking
about you a lot...

1089
01:04:17,137 --> 01:04:18,777
and I had to see you.
1090
01:04:22,018 --> 01:04:24,898
What are those,
like some kind of a bribe?
1091
01:04:25,062 --> 01:04:30,302
More like... gentle persuasion.
1092
01:04:35,073 --> 01:04:37,553
Is this going to get
worse before it gets better?
1093
01:04:37,701 --> 01:04:39,381
Probably, but I got
to get this out...
1094
01:04:39,494 --> 01:04:41,014
before I lose
my train of thought.
1095
01:04:41,122 --> 01:04:43,482
See...
1096
01:04:43,623 --> 01:04:47,663
Nicole had this...
1097
01:04:47,878 --> 01:04:50,918
special status.
1098
01:04:51,091 --> 01:04:53,211
More like a special power.
1099
01:04:53,343 --> 01:04:55,623
And I couldn't match it...
1100
01:04:55,721 --> 01:04:57,641
and I couldn't find anybody
to replace it.
1101
01:04:57,764 --> 01:05:00,604
- I think I get it.
- You do?
1102

01:05:02,061 --> 01:05:06,061

It's very easy to confuse
a physical attraction...
1103
01:05:06,273 --> 01:05:07,953
with a real connection.
1104
01:05:08,067 --> 01:05:10,107
Yeah.
Sometimes you just can't tell.
1105
01:05:10,236 --> 01:05:11,996
Well, you can tell.
1106
01:05:12,113 --> 01:05:14,113
You can tell by the kiss.
1107
01:05:14,240 --> 01:05:17,440
You know, the other stuff...
the sex, "Is he hot?"
1108
01:05:17,618 --> 01:05:20,098
It doesn't matter.
1109
01:05:20,247 --> 01:05:22,887
All that matters is the kiss.
1110
01:05:25,002 --> 01:05:26,842
How do you know about me?
1111
01:05:26,962 --> 01:05:28,602
I don't.
1112
01:05:38,599 --> 01:05:41,559
I don't even know
If you can feel that.
1113
01:05:43,271 --> 01:05:45,111
I can feel that.
1114
01:05:47,108 --> 01:05:48,508
Is this against the rules?
1115
01:05:52,156 --> 01:05:53,876
I'll let you be
the judge of that.

1116
01:05:55,743 --> 01:05:59,263
- I'm thinking now.
- I'm thinking now, too.
1117
01:05:59,455 --> 01:06:01,615
Come here.
1118
01:06:40,082 --> 01:06:45,802
# I wanna walk beside you #
1119
01:06:46,089 --> 01:06:53,409
# Nowhere
that I have ever been #
1120
01:06:53,764 --> 01:06:59,164
# And all the dreams
inside you #
1121
01:06:59,436 --> 01:07:05,276
# I am the one
you have not seen #
1122
01:07:05,568 --> 01:07:12,128
# I feel immune #
1123
01:07:12,451 --> 01:07:15,771
# By my own mind #
1124
01:07:15,954 --> 01:07:19,354
# I can't refuse #
1125
01:07:19,541 --> 01:07:26,021
# An offer to make love #
1126
01:07:27,925 --> 01:07:29,125
# To you #
1127
01:07:33,390 --> 01:07:38,150
# How come your words
affect me #
1128
01:07:38,394 --> 01:07:39,474
Ooh.
1129
01:07:39,563 --> 01:07:42,363
# I have not wanted #

1130
01:07:42,524 --> 01:07:47,204
# To be allowed #
1131
01:07:47,447 --> 01:07:50,807
# And yet
I made you set free #
1132
01:07:53,118 --> 01:07:59,998
# With all the meaning
was the sound #
1133
01:08:00,336 --> 01:08:05,336
# In your refrain #
1134
01:08:05,590 --> 01:08:08,910
# I hear the chords #
1135
01:08:09,095 --> 01:08:11,335
# Of love in vain #
1136
01:08:11,471 --> 01:08:13,151
Ohh.
1137
01:08:13,266 --> 01:08:15,506
# How can I help #
1138
01:08:15,642 --> 01:08:20,602
# Calling your name? #
1139
01:08:28,448 --> 01:08:31,848
I wasn't supposed
to do that, was I?
1140
01:08:32,036 --> 01:08:34,716
Huh? Huh?
1141
01:08:36,665 --> 01:08:38,585
Mmm.
1142
01:08:44,091 --> 01:08:45,931
Good night, sweetie.
1143
01:08:46,051 --> 01:08:49,571
Oh, no. Don't go to sleep yet,
because...

1144
01:08:49,763 --> 01:08:50,963
we should talk about something.
1145
01:08:51,056 --> 01:08:53,856
- Mm-hmm.
- We could talk about anything.
1146
01:08:54,018 --> 01:08:55,578
We could talk about...
1147
01:08:55,686 --> 01:08:57,726
we could talk about stickers.
1148
01:08:57,854 --> 01:09:00,094
Do you like stickers?
1149
01:09:01,943 --> 01:09:03,023
Erica?
1150
01:09:34,143 --> 01:09:35,943
Matt, what are you doing?
1151
01:09:36,021 --> 01:09:38,141
The Willow and Smart people
are here.
1152
01:09:38,273 --> 01:09:40,113
We're late
for the presentation. Come on.
1153
01:09:49,786 --> 01:09:51,426
- Oh, my...
- What the...
1154
01:09:56,876 --> 01:09:59,116
Hi. Sorry I'm late.
1155
01:09:59,212 --> 01:10:02,372
- Miss Willow.
- Ohh.
1156
01:10:02,550 --> 01:10:04,110
Uhh.
1157
01:10:04,218 --> 01:10:06,818

Come on over here

for a second. Um...
1158
01:10:06,971 --> 01:10:09,571
Want some camomile tea?
1159
01:10:09,723 --> 01:10:13,283
I think little Mattie
is trying to say hello.
1160
01:10:13,478 --> 01:10:14,558
Oh, Jesus.
1161
01:10:14,645 --> 01:10:16,885
You might want to try
some tightly-whiteys, jeans.
1162
01:10:17,024 --> 01:10:18,624
- You, go home. Now.
- OK.
1163
01:10:22,404 --> 01:10:24,924
So, shall we get it on?
1164
01:10:25,074 --> 01:10:26,354
Start?
1165
01:10:28,285 --> 01:10:30,205
From a flower?
1166
01:10:34,876 --> 01:10:36,796
Like, a vibrating flower?
1167
01:10:36,919 --> 01:10:39,759
No. No, just a flower.
1168
01:10:39,923 --> 01:10:43,243
And he didn't touch you once?
1169
01:10:43,426 --> 01:10:44,866
He didn't even try
to touch you?
1170
01:10:44,969 --> 01:10:46,369
No, and I so wanted him to...
1171

01:10:46,472 --> 01:10:48,312

but what we were doing
was so perfect.
1172
01:10:48,432 --> 01:10:50,672
Oh, yeah, perfect...
1173
01:10:50,810 --> 01:10:52,850
the immaculate orgasm.
1174
01:10:52,979 --> 01:10:56,659
- Yes.
- You are unbelievable.
1175
01:10:56,857 --> 01:11:00,577
# Yeah, yeah, yeah #
1176
01:11:00,779 --> 01:11:05,539
# We have a space to share #
1177
01:11:08,787 --> 01:11:10,067
Erica.
1178
01:11:10,163 --> 01:11:12,003
# What I'm gonna do
with today #
1179
01:11:12,124 --> 01:11:13,404
Coming.
1180
01:11:13,459 --> 01:11:14,899
Hey, baby.
1181
01:11:15,002 --> 01:11:18,282
Oh, that's sweet.
I really needed to hear that.
1182
01:11:21,634 --> 01:11:25,314
Oh, God, I must look awful.
1183
01:11:25,471 --> 01:11:26,591
Yeah.
1184
01:11:27,891 --> 01:11:30,971
Well, you don't look so great.
1185

01:11:31,144 --> 01:11:35,144

It's a long story. What are you
doing here, Nicole?
1186
01:11:35,357 --> 01:11:38,157
I just...
1187
01:11:38,319 --> 01:11:40,839
needed to talk to someone.
1188
01:11:40,989 --> 01:11:42,709
Where's David?
1189
01:11:42,824 --> 01:11:45,264
I don't know.
At the office, probably.
1190
01:11:45,410 --> 01:11:47,450
Working late?
1191
01:11:54,336 --> 01:11:57,816
We broke it off. It's over.
1192
01:11:58,007 --> 01:12:01,007
Or he broke it off,
I don't know.
1193
01:12:01,176 --> 01:12:03,776
I made the commitment...
1194
01:12:03,930 --> 01:12:06,370
but I guess he wasn't
too committed to it.
1195
01:12:06,516 --> 01:12:08,876
I'm sorry.
1196
01:12:12,606 --> 01:12:14,126
How's...
1197
01:12:16,192 --> 01:12:17,312
Emily?
1198
01:12:17,402 --> 01:12:19,762
Her name's Erica.
1199

01:12:19,863 --> 01:12:21,263

Good.
1200
01:12:21,365 --> 01:12:26,285
You never think about me
anymore?
1201
01:12:26,537 --> 01:12:29,057
Not even just a little?
1202
01:12:31,125 --> 01:12:33,925
Let me put it this way.
1203
01:12:34,044 --> 01:12:35,964
I have thought about you...
1204
01:12:36,090 --> 01:12:39,730
about us... a lot.
1205
01:12:39,927 --> 01:12:42,127
But tonight,
when you came in...
1206
01:12:42,262 --> 01:12:46,062
was the first time I didn't get
all fucked up about it.
1207
01:12:47,893 --> 01:12:50,613
I think we could get you
fucked up about it again.
1208
01:12:50,730 --> 01:12:54,410
Hey.
Maybe you should go, hmm?
1209
01:12:54,567 --> 01:12:57,887
Mmm, I think your little friend
here wants me to stay.
1210
01:12:58,071 --> 01:12:59,351
Yeah, well, my little friend's
not in charge anymore...
1211
01:12:59,405 --> 01:13:00,485
so maybe you should go.
1212
01:13:00,574 --> 01:13:02,974

You're saying no to me?

1213
01:13:03,076 --> 01:13:05,036
You always do this to me...
1214
01:13:05,162 --> 01:13:06,802
and I'm the idiot
because I keep coming back...
1215
01:13:06,914 --> 01:13:08,554
but I'm not coming back
anymore.
1216
01:13:08,666 --> 01:13:11,506
You take everything from me.
1217
01:13:11,669 --> 01:13:13,069
That is so not true.
1218
01:13:13,170 --> 01:13:15,130
Oh, yeah? Name me one thing
that you ever gave me.
1219
01:13:18,259 --> 01:13:21,019
l... I gave you
The Bridges of Madison County...
1220
01:13:21,178 --> 01:13:22,258
you ungrateful asshole.
1221
01:13:22,347 --> 01:13:23,827
I never told you this. I didn't
want to hurt your feelings.
1222
01:13:23,932 --> 01:13:26,812
That was the biggest piece
of trash I ever tried to read.
1223
01:13:26,977 --> 01:13:28,257
You pig.
1224
01:13:31,440 --> 01:13:34,520
Matt, I am so... so mad
that I have...
1225
01:13:34,694 --> 01:13:36,214
I have to tell you.

1226
01:13:36,321 --> 01:13:38,681
Watching you standing up
for yourself like this...
1227
01:13:38,781 --> 01:13:41,661
has never made me so...
1228
01:13:41,826 --> 01:13:42,946
so...
1229
01:13:46,414 --> 01:13:47,614
hot.
1230
01:13:47,707 --> 01:13:50,027
I like this.
1231
01:13:50,168 --> 01:13:51,768
Where have you been?
1232
01:13:54,464 --> 01:13:56,464
You can slam that door
in my face if you want...
1233
01:13:56,591 --> 01:13:59,471
but I'll just be
on the other side, even hotter.
1234
01:13:59,637 --> 01:14:03,317
Holy hell.
1235
01:14:03,516 --> 01:14:08,156
Slam that door
in my dirty, bad, bad face.
1236
01:14:08,396 --> 01:14:11,316
Oh, God, Matt, slam it!
1237
01:14:25,165 --> 01:14:27,085
Aah!
1238
01:14:30,503 --> 01:14:32,103
Will you just
think about it, OK?
1239
01:14:32,213 --> 01:14:34,173

The dude was in the john

with a dirty mag.
1240
01:14:34,298 --> 01:14:36,138
If that's me,
I'm painting the ceiling.
1241
01:14:36,259 --> 01:14:38,179
Who does this Matt guy
think he is, anyways?
1242
01:14:38,303 --> 01:14:41,103
He's jerking us around.
How do we know this is real?
1243
01:14:41,265 --> 01:14:44,225
If you just go to Big Window,
look at the dude's face.
1244
01:14:44,393 --> 01:14:46,753
You would know. It's for real.
1245
01:14:46,895 --> 01:14:48,815
Merj, how many times
have I been wrong?
1246
01:14:48,939 --> 01:14:51,299
Pfft.
Stupid monkey-ass moron.
1247
01:14:51,442 --> 01:14:53,402
Why don't you quit
wasting my time over here?
1248
01:14:54,696 --> 01:14:56,256
Hey, bagel guy.
1249
01:14:59,659 --> 01:15:02,379
You know my name?
1250
01:15:02,538 --> 01:15:05,378
She says to me,
"You look like Lionel Richie."
1251
01:15:05,541 --> 01:15:07,301
Well, that's great, isn't it?
1252

01:15:07,377 --> 01:15:09,057

No, that's not great.
That's not good.
1253
01:15:09,170 --> 01:15:10,290
Are you Chris?
1254
01:15:10,380 --> 01:15:13,060
- No, but I can be.
- Chris would be me.
1255
01:15:13,216 --> 01:15:15,336
Excuse me.
1256
01:15:15,469 --> 01:15:18,309
I need to place a bet.
1257
01:15:19,723 --> 01:15:20,723
Can you deal with this?
1258
01:15:24,560 --> 01:15:28,120
- Yeah, sure.
- Good.
1259
01:15:28,316 --> 01:15:30,036
The thing is,
it's a sucker bet.
1260
01:15:30,151 --> 01:15:31,751
It's going to be over
in twenty four hours.
1261
01:15:31,861 --> 01:15:35,101
32 hours, 12 minutes,
and 26 seconds.
1262
01:15:35,239 --> 01:15:36,359
Thanks.
1263
01:15:37,993 --> 01:15:39,873
Plus, Matt
has this whole, uh...
1264
01:15:39,994 --> 01:15:43,594
you know, midnight madness
thing mapped out and...
1265

01:15:43,790 --> 01:15:46,590

His friend is coming over
at the stroke of midnight.
1266
01:15:46,752 --> 01:15:48,952
You get it?
The stroke of midnight?
1267
01:15:50,965 --> 01:15:52,725
Thanks, buddy.
1268
01:15:54,427 --> 01:15:55,827
So, you'll take it?
1269
01:15:55,928 --> 01:15:58,488
Sure.
1270
01:15:58,639 --> 01:16:00,319
Thank you.
1271
01:16:00,432 --> 01:16:03,312
- Aw...
1272
01:16:03,478 --> 01:16:05,398
- Uhh.
1273
01:16:10,110 --> 01:16:12,830
# I close my eyes
when I get too sad #
1274
01:16:12,988 --> 01:16:15,188
# I think thoughts
that I know are bad #
1275
01:16:15,282 --> 01:16:17,962
# Close my eyes,
and I count to ten #
1276
01:16:18,118 --> 01:16:20,358
# Hope it's over
when I open them #
1277
01:16:20,455 --> 01:16:22,775
# I want the things
that I had before #
1278
01:16:22,915 --> 01:16:25,675

# Like a Star Wars poster

on the bedroom door #
1279
01:16:25,793 --> 01:16:27,313
# I wish I could
count to ten #
1280
01:16:27,420 --> 01:16:28,780
Ohh! Ohh!
1281
01:16:28,880 --> 01:16:30,320
# Make everything
be wonderful again #
1282
01:16:30,423 --> 01:16:33,183
Ohh! Ohh! Aah!
1283
01:16:33,344 --> 01:16:35,824
# We'll sit around
while they get some air #
1284
01:16:35,970 --> 01:16:38,490
# I hear them scream,
I hear them fight #
1285
01:16:38,640 --> 01:16:41,360
# They say bad words
that make me want to cry #
1286
01:16:41,519 --> 01:16:42,799
# I close my eyes
when I go to bed #
1287
01:16:42,895 --> 01:16:45,975
She's filled
with heavenly sweetness.
1288
01:16:46,149 --> 01:16:48,189
# I'll feel better
when I hear them say #
1289
01:16:48,317 --> 01:16:49,717
I somehow don't think
Mr. Butterworth...
1290
01:16:49,820 --> 01:16:51,780
would appreciate that
very much.

1291
01:16:51,905 --> 01:16:54,705
# Why must this mean
everything #
1292
01:16:54,824 --> 01:16:59,304
# When you're little,
and the world's so big #
1293
01:16:59,538 --> 01:17:02,258
# I just don't
understand how #
1294
01:17:02,417 --> 01:17:05,977
# You can smile with
all those tears in your eyes #
1295
01:17:06,170 --> 01:17:10,330
# Tell me
everything is wonderful now #
1296
01:17:10,550 --> 01:17:12,710
# No #
1297
01:17:12,844 --> 01:17:14,444
# Na na na na na na na #
1298
01:17:14,554 --> 01:17:18,194
# No, I don't wanna hear you
tell me #
1299
01:17:18,392 --> 01:17:20,392
Excuse me, is this taken?
1300
01:17:20,519 --> 01:17:22,239
No.
1301
01:17:22,354 --> 01:17:25,674
# That I will understand
some day #
1302
01:17:25,858 --> 01:17:27,578
# No, no, no #
1303
01:17:27,693 --> 01:17:30,213
# No, no, no, no #

1304
01:17:30,362 --> 01:17:33,362
# Someday,
If I hate everything #
1305
01:17:33,533 --> 01:17:35,133
# Please don't tell me #
1306
01:17:35,243 --> 01:17:37,963
# Everything
Is wonderful now #
1307
01:17:38,122 --> 01:17:40,722
# Na na na na na na na #
1308
01:17:40,873 --> 01:17:41,953
# Na na na na na na na #
1309
01:17:42,042 --> 01:17:43,762
# No #
1310
01:17:43,877 --> 01:17:45,757
Aah!
1311
01:17:45,879 --> 01:17:49,199
# Everything
Is wonderful now #
1312
01:17:50,426 --> 01:17:52,466
- You got to help me.
- You got to knock.
1313
01:17:56,808 --> 01:17:57,968
I'm seeing things.
1314
01:17:58,059 --> 01:18:00,139
I swear to God,
everywhere I look...
1315
01:18:00,269 --> 01:18:02,349
I'm seeing tits and ass.
1316
01:18:02,481 --> 01:18:06,361
When I came in here, I swear
to God, I saw you kissing a nun.
1317
01:18:13,576 --> 01:18:16,176

Oh, my God!
You were kissing a nun!
1318
01:18:16,329 --> 01:18:19,049
I'm slipping, Matt.
I've already slipped.
1319
01:18:19,206 --> 01:18:21,926
- It's your stories.
- This is my fault?
1320
01:18:22,085 --> 01:18:23,725
No, it's mine.
1321
01:18:23,837 --> 01:18:25,397
It's been bubbling
under the surface...
1322
01:18:25,505 --> 01:18:27,825
for a long time now.
1323
01:18:27,966 --> 01:18:29,566
I'm leaving the seminary
for a little while.
1324
01:18:29,676 --> 01:18:31,396
What?
1325
01:18:31,512 --> 01:18:34,232
It's just a sabbatical.
If I come back...
1326
01:18:34,389 --> 01:18:36,789
When I come back,
it'll be for good.
1327
01:18:36,934 --> 01:18:39,054
So, you can't help me?
1328
01:18:39,186 --> 01:18:42,026
You're on your own, little man.
1329
01:19:01,961 --> 01:19:03,041
Ahh.
1330
01:19:07,508 --> 01:19:10,348
Well, welcome

to the cathedral of ill repute.

1331
01:19:10,471 --> 01:19:11,551
Merci, monsieur.
1332
01:19:11,637 --> 01:19:13,917
Um, make yourself comfortable.
1333
01:19:14,057 --> 01:19:15,697
Bien sur.
1334
01:19:16,978 --> 01:19:19,258
I almost fucked
an outlet today.
1335
01:19:21,273 --> 01:19:22,993
You, uh...
1336
01:19:23,108 --> 01:19:25,108
Since when do you smoke, Matt?
1337
01:19:25,236 --> 01:19:27,436
- Since today.
- Jesus.
1338
01:19:27,572 --> 01:19:29,492
Is this him?
1339
01:19:29,615 --> 01:19:31,335
Yep. That's our boy.
1340
01:19:31,451 --> 01:19:33,771
You've started
a whole new movement.
1341
01:19:33,912 --> 01:19:37,992
Megatonchism...
sex without orgasms ever.
1342
01:19:39,835 --> 01:19:42,515
You like to party?
1343
01:19:42,671 --> 01:19:44,951
Can I borrow your handcuffs?
1344
01:19:47,050 --> 01:19:49,530

If my hand is free, I'm

bound to do anything with it.
1345
01:19:49,679 --> 01:19:50,759
Anything.
1346
01:19:50,847 --> 01:19:52,607
How much did you drink, Matt?
1347
01:19:52,683 --> 01:19:54,923
God's spirit made Jesus
go to the desert.
1348
01:19:55,018 --> 01:19:57,698
He was there for forty days
while Satan tested him.
1349
01:19:57,854 --> 01:20:00,454
He was living
with the wild animals...
1350
01:20:00,607 --> 01:20:03,487
but angels took care of him.
1351
01:20:03,652 --> 01:20:06,252
Mark 1:12.
1352
01:20:13,537 --> 01:20:15,177
I look like Jesus on the cross.
1353
01:20:15,290 --> 01:20:18,330
- Yes, you do.
- Yep.
1354
01:20:18,501 --> 01:20:19,901
You do.
1355
01:20:20,003 --> 01:20:22,123
So, what about
your late night visitor?
1356
01:20:22,256 --> 01:20:25,216
Leave the front door
open a little bit...
1357
01:20:25,384 --> 01:20:29,344
and put that key right there.

1358
01:20:31,891 --> 01:20:33,051
When she comes,
I'll tell her...
1359
01:20:33,142 --> 01:20:34,782
I was accosted
by home invaders...
1360
01:20:34,895 --> 01:20:36,615
and they tied me up.
1361
01:20:36,730 --> 01:20:39,410
OK, champ. Anastasia and I
are going to leave now...
1362
01:20:39,566 --> 01:20:42,926
so... you should sleep.
1363
01:20:43,112 --> 01:20:44,512
Think about the angels.
1364
01:20:44,613 --> 01:20:46,773
Peace be with you.
1365
01:20:48,408 --> 01:20:52,568
He is a little weird,
but it is Easter.
1366
01:21:00,296 --> 01:21:01,936
I feel like
it's my first time.
1367
01:21:02,048 --> 01:21:03,968
It is, isn't it?
1368
01:21:04,092 --> 01:21:07,372
You are going to be great.
1369
01:21:07,554 --> 01:21:08,874
It's going to be great.
1370
01:21:26,950 --> 01:21:28,390
Ha!
1371
01:21:31,497 --> 01:21:35,417

Haah!
1372
01:21:56,148 --> 01:21:57,468
Whoal
1373
01:21:57,566 --> 01:22:00,966
Aahl
1374
01:22:14,667 --> 01:22:16,387
Uhh
1375
01:22:19,589 --> 01:22:20,829
Show me you can do it.
1376
01:22:23,928 --> 01:22:26,248
You can do it, Matt.
1377
01:22:26,388 --> 01:22:28,588
Show me you can do it.
1378
01:22:28,724 --> 01:22:30,244
Ohh.
1379
01:22:33,103 --> 01:22:35,423
You can do it, Matt.
You can do it.
1380
01:22:35,565 --> 01:22:37,445
You can...
1381
01:22:37,567 --> 01:22:39,007
Ohh!
1382
01:22:41,404 --> 01:22:43,204
Oh, there we go.
1383
01:22:43,324 --> 01:22:47,044
- Doesn't that feel better?
- Ohh. Uhh.
1384
01:22:47,244 --> 01:22:49,284
Relax, baby.
1385
01:22:49,414 --> 01:22:51,254
It's over.

1386
01:22:58,964 --> 01:23:02,044
What? Why?
Why would you do this?
1387
01:23:02,218 --> 01:23:04,818
Well, this all started
because of me.
1388
01:23:04,971 --> 01:23:07,771
It only seems natural
that I should end it, huh?
1389
01:23:11,728 --> 01:23:15,208
Oh, here's your key.
1390
01:23:15,399 --> 01:23:17,439
I kept meaning to return it.
1391
01:23:17,568 --> 01:23:19,448
It turns out
the front door was open.
1392
01:23:21,906 --> 01:23:22,986
Are you expecting someone?
1393
01:23:23,074 --> 01:23:26,074
Oh, fuck.
1394
01:23:53,440 --> 01:23:54,760
- Uhh!
1395
01:24:02,784 --> 01:24:05,544
Oh, my...
1396
01:24:05,703 --> 01:24:08,783
I was asleep.
I thought she was you.
1397
01:24:08,957 --> 01:24:11,677
Ohh. Was it worth it?
1398
01:24:14,296 --> 01:24:16,336
Oh, come on, Erica, please.
1399
01:24:16,464 --> 01:24:17,944
Erica!

1400
01:24:19,635 --> 01:24:20,715
Erica!
1401
01:24:20,803 --> 01:24:22,523
Oh, shit.
1402
01:24:45,288 --> 01:24:47,848
# I see the fever #
1403
01:24:47,999 --> 01:24:53,239
# And I love her for that #
1404
01:24:53,505 --> 01:24:55,585
I'll say it was me. I'll say
I set the whole thing up.
1405
01:24:55,715 --> 01:24:58,355
I'll say that I handcuffed you
to the bed... which is true...
1406
01:24:58,509 --> 01:25:01,189
that I sent her over here.
1407
01:25:01,346 --> 01:25:02,906
She was here to see me.
1408
01:25:04,725 --> 01:25:06,365
No.
1409
01:25:06,476 --> 01:25:10,676
No? I'll tell her something
less idiotic, obviously, but...
1410
01:25:12,192 --> 01:25:14,792
No.
1411
01:25:14,943 --> 01:25:17,463
No more lies.
1412
01:25:17,614 --> 01:25:19,094
This doesn't seem like
one of those...
1413
01:25:19,198 --> 01:25:22,078
"truth will set you free"

situations.
1414
01:25:23,912 --> 01:25:25,512
No, it doesn't.
1415
01:25:33,797 --> 01:25:36,237
Hey.
1416
01:25:36,383 --> 01:25:38,663
Guess who dropped by.
1417
01:25:40,179 --> 01:25:42,459
He left hours ago.
1418
01:25:42,557 --> 01:25:44,757
He brought you this.
1419
01:25:44,893 --> 01:25:47,573
Personally,
I prefer the telegram...
1420
01:25:47,729 --> 01:25:49,649
but I did get to talk to him
for a little bit.
1421
01:25:49,774 --> 01:25:51,654
So?
I don't want to hear about it.
1422
01:25:51,775 --> 01:25:54,615
- OK.
- But now you're on his side?
1423
01:25:54,778 --> 01:25:57,618
Yeah, Erica.
He melted my heart.
1424
01:25:57,740 --> 01:26:01,140
He's a real mess about you.
It was a little pathetic.
1425
01:26:01,327 --> 01:26:03,447
That's not good enough.
1426
01:26:03,579 --> 01:26:04,859
Don't be stupid, Erica.

1427
01:26:04,915 --> 01:26:07,355
He's crazy about you.
What else do you want?
1428
01:26:07,500 --> 01:26:14,140
# She wouldn't let me,
and I love her for that #
1429
01:26:15,926 --> 01:26:19,566
# Ooh, oh #
1430
01:26:21,766 --> 01:26:24,446
# And though #
1431
01:26:24,602 --> 01:26:27,602
# You steal her #
1432
01:26:27,772 --> 01:26:32,892
# You love her
and deceive her #
1433
01:26:33,111 --> 01:26:38,111
# She did nothing #
1434
01:26:38,368 --> 01:26:41,208
# So wrong #
1435
01:26:41,369 --> 01:26:47,329
# So wrong #
1436
01:27:05,521 --> 01:27:07,281
# Oh #
1437
01:27:07,399 --> 01:27:09,519
Helps with static cling.
1438
01:27:09,651 --> 01:27:15,931
# And I love her for that #
1439
01:27:20,287 --> 01:27:22,047
Where's your laundry?
1440
01:27:24,667 --> 01:27:26,907
I've been here
every day this week.

1441
01:27:27,045 --> 01:27:29,085
All my laundry's clean.
1442
01:27:34,218 --> 01:27:36,778
I know I screwed up with you...
1443
01:27:36,930 --> 01:27:39,330
over and over and over.
1444
01:27:39,474 --> 01:27:42,274
It just took me a long time
to realize what I was doing.
1445
01:27:42,435 --> 01:27:43,995
Yes, it did.
1446
01:27:46,147 --> 01:27:51,427
I was trying to take a part
of me and make it go away.
1447
01:27:51,696 --> 01:27:57,736
And I closed my world off, and
I put myself in a little box.
1448
01:27:58,036 --> 01:28:00,396
And for a while,
everything seemed clear.
1449
01:28:03,958 --> 01:28:05,678
But then you came along...
1450
01:28:05,794 --> 01:28:09,554
and that didn't help anything.
1451
01:28:11,217 --> 01:28:13,497
Remember when you said
that you could never tell...
1452
01:28:13,635 --> 01:28:14,875
about someone
until you kiss them?
1453
01:28:18,098 --> 01:28:20,338
Well...
1454
01:28:20,477 --> 01:28:24,517

I screwed up.
l... I should've just done this.
1455
01:28:35,910 --> 01:28:38,430
Are you done talking now?
1456
01:29:00,310 --> 01:29:02,310
Thirty eight hours exactly.
1457
01:29:02,437 --> 01:29:04,637
- Son of a bitch.
- Damn it.
1458
01:29:04,774 --> 01:29:07,974
The pot's up to 140. Anybody
else want in on hour 39?
1459
01:29:08,110 --> 01:29:09,830
Hey, hey.
1460
01:29:09,946 --> 01:29:13,266
How do we even know that
they're still even in there?
1461
01:29:13,450 --> 01:29:17,090
They could've put the CD player
on repeat or shuffle.
1462
01:29:17,288 --> 01:29:19,928
- That's a good point.
- It is a good point...
1463
01:29:20,082 --> 01:29:21,522
because they could've
snuck out the back window...
1464
01:29:21,625 --> 01:29:23,545
and we're still sitting around
here like a bunch of chimps.
1465
01:29:23,670 --> 01:29:25,950
- Chimps.
- You know what? Look at me.
1466
01:29:26,088 --> 01:29:28,728
I've been here the whole time.
Believe it.

1467
01:29:40,771 --> 01:29:43,651
Oh, put me in for a tenner.
1468
01:29:43,815 --> 01:29:48,415
He'll keep going.
Two dollars, please.
1469
01:29:49,823 --> 01:29:52,223
- Uhh.
1470
01:30:03,045 --> 01:30:04,765
- Hey, Matt.
- What's up, Matt?
1471
01:30:04,880 --> 01:30:05,960
Hey, Matt.
1472
01:30:06,048 --> 01:30:08,928
All right, you guys. Come on,
get out. Get out of my house.
1473
01:30:10,594 --> 01:30:12,274
No, no. You know what?
1474
01:30:12,389 --> 01:30:13,789
Come on, come on.
Get out of my house.
1475
01:30:13,847 --> 01:30:15,167
I'll just take this.
1476
01:30:15,265 --> 01:30:16,945
Bye.
1477
01:30:17,060 --> 01:30:18,580
- Later, stud.
- See you later.
1478
01:30:18,686 --> 01:30:21,206
Thanks for the fish, Matt.
1479
01:30:21,356 --> 01:30:23,396
Looking good. How long
are you going to be in there?
1480
01:30:23,525 --> 01:30:24,845

- Let's go.
- Hey, I'm going.
1481
01:30:24,943 --> 01:30:26,783
Chris, I'm going to call you
tomorrow, all right?
1482
01:30:26,861 --> 01:30:27,981
- What are you doing?
- You, too.
1483
01:30:28,071 --> 01:30:29,951
- I don't have my keys on me.
- Good.
1484
01:30:30,073 --> 01:30:31,473
Wait, this is my house, dude.
1485
01:30:31,533 --> 01:30:34,333
Not for the next
twenty four hours, it's not.
1486
01:30:34,495 --> 01:30:37,375
And you all should be
ashamed of yourselves.
1487
01:30:37,540 --> 01:30:39,340
You're kidding.
Don't have sex on my bed.
1488
01:30:39,458 --> 01:30:42,538
He can't last in there
another 24 hours. He'll die.
1489
01:30:42,712 --> 01:30:44,752
How much you want to bet?
1490
01:30:44,881 --> 01:30:48,521
How much do I want to bet
that he'll actually die?
1491
01:30:48,719 --> 01:30:51,279
- I'll put ten bucks on it.
- Another ten.
1492
01:30:51,430 --> 01:30:52,710
I don't have a life.

1493
01:30:53,016 --> 01:30:55,456
# A little
sexual frustration #
1494
01:30:55,601 --> 01:30:58,681
# Combined with
lack of motivation #
1495
01:30:58,855 --> 01:31:01,615
# And a loss
of concentration #
1496
01:31:01,774 --> 01:31:05,374
# I got a strange disease #
1497
01:31:05,570 --> 01:31:07,290
# Two weeks ago #
1498
01:31:07,405 --> 01:31:10,565
# You said
you'd never leave me #
1499
01:31:10,743 --> 01:31:13,063
# And here I am alone #
1500
01:31:13,203 --> 01:31:16,683
# And in this world
of reckless happenstance #
1501
01:31:16,873 --> 01:31:19,753
# Why do good things
have to go away #
1502
01:31:19,919 --> 01:31:22,479
# And leave you with nothing #
1503
01:31:22,630 --> 01:31:24,710
# Yeah,
you left me with nothing #
1504
01:31:24,840 --> 01:31:27,840
# Ah ah ah ah #
1505
01:31:28,011 --> 01:31:29,931
# Ah #
1506

01:31:30,054 --> 01:31:32,614

# A strange disease #
1507
01:31:32,766 --> 01:31:35,646
# Wee-ooh, wee-ooh #
1508
01:31:35,811 --> 01:31:38,851
# Wee-ooh, wee-ooh #
1509
01:31:39,023 --> 01:31:41,623
# Wee-ooh, wee-ooh #
1510
01:31:41,776 --> 01:31:44,776
# Overemotional sensations #
1511
01:31:44,946 --> 01:31:47,826
# Sit by your
television stations #
1512
01:31:47,990 --> 01:31:51,070
# And unaffected
by locations #
1513
01:31:51,244 --> 01:31:54,244
# I got a strange disease #
1514
01:31:54,413 --> 01:31:57,253
# I can't seem
to get to sleep #
1515
01:31:57,417 --> 01:32:00,417
# I don't want
nothing to eat #
1516
01:32:00,587 --> 01:32:03,267
# Walking up and down
your street #
1517
01:32:03,424 --> 01:32:06,864
# I got a strange disease #
1518
01:32:07,052 --> 01:32:09,252
# Why did you have #
1519
01:32:09,389 --> 01:32:12,309
# To put
so much pressure on me? #

1520
01:32:12,476 --> 01:32:14,876
# You pushed my heart away #
1521
01:32:15,019 --> 01:32:18,379
# I didn't mean to scare you,
little one #
1522
01:32:18,565 --> 01:32:21,485
# Is there nothing
I can say? #
1523
01:32:21,651 --> 01:32:24,251
# Don't leave me
with nothing #
1524
01:32:24,405 --> 01:32:26,445
# Yeah, you left me
with nothing #
1525
01:32:26,573 --> 01:32:29,533
# Ah ah ah ah #
1526
01:32:29,701 --> 01:32:31,581
# Ah #
1527
01:32:31,662 --> 01:32:34,262
# And a strange disease #
1528
01:32:34,415 --> 01:32:37,335
# Wee-ooh, wee-ooh #
1529
01:32:37,502 --> 01:32:40,502
# Wee-ooh, wee-ooh #
1530
01:32:40,672 --> 01:32:43,192
# Wee-ooh, wee-ooh #
1531
01:32:56,231 --> 01:32:59,071
# Now I'm standing
in the rain #
1532
01:32:59,191 --> 01:33:02,111
# Water's soaking
through my brain #
1533

01:33:02,278 --> 01:33:05,158

# Every droplet
speaks your name #
1534
01:33:05,324 --> 01:33:08,444
# And it's driving me insane #
1535
01:33:08,618 --> 01:33:11,738
# I don't want to go to work,
my libido's gone berserk #
1536
01:33:11,913 --> 01:33:13,233
# I don't want
nothing to eat #
1537
01:33:13,332 --> 01:33:14,692
# Walkin' up and down
your street #
1538
01:33:14,792 --> 01:33:16,872
# But only two weeks ago #
1539
01:33:17,002 --> 01:33:20,122
# You said
you'd never leave me #
1540
01:33:20,297 --> 01:33:22,737
# Now here I am alone #
1541
01:33:22,884 --> 01:33:26,244
# And in this world
of reckless happenstance #
1542
01:33:26,429 --> 01:33:29,389
# Why do good things
have to go away #
1543
01:33:29,558 --> 01:33:31,998
# And leave you
with nothing #
1544
01:33:32,144 --> 01:33:34,344
# Yeah,
you left me with nothing #
1545
01:33:34,480 --> 01:33:37,400
# Ah ah ah ah #

1546
01:33:37,566 --> 01:33:39,526
# Ah #
1547
01:33:39,651 --> 01:33:42,291
# A strange disease #
1548
01:33:42,447 --> 01:33:45,327
# Wee-ooh, wee-ooh #