Father’s Day Sermon – Understanding God’s Authority as a Father

Today, I would like to speak about how to fatherhood and authority. Yes, we are all aware of
about what the Bible says about wives submitting to and obeying their husbands, and about children
respecting and obeying their parents. These things are important, but it’s even more important for
fathers to understand and submit to the authority of God.
First, please let me say that I have been a father for only five years, and so don’t have an
extensive amount of practical experience in fatherhood. However, I have a great father and many other
great examples here in the church to learn from. Also, I believe that what we will learn today applies to
everyone if you can listen sensitively.
In the beginning, it was God who established fatherhood. He made Adam the first husband and
father, and He makes each of us fathers. God is the one who said, “Be fruitful and multiply, and fill the
earth.” And, it is God who imparts life and spirit to each new baby. When we get married, God separates
the man from his parents’ family and makes him the head of a new family. At that moment, whether
that man is a believer or unbeliever, he takes on the mantle of fatherhood. This is authority from God.
I can attest to this. In the months after I got married, it started sinking in that I was no longer a
lone ranger. I had a tremendous responsibility and commitment. They don’t call it “settling down” for
nothing! And, from the first time I laid eyes on my daughter Cora, I was felt the strong desire to give
myself up for her safety and provision. That was the mantle of fatherhood that comes from God.
The Bible says that God is the source of all authority and that there is no authority apart from
Him. He establishes all authority so that the authorities that have been established are from Him.
Fathers carry God’s authority in their families and are accountable to Him. This means that, even if your
father or husband is not a believer or is not a perfect father, wives and children must submit to the
father. For wives and children to rebel against the father in the house is for them to rebel against God.
As believing fathers, it is important for us to understand how to properly exercise God’s
authority. The critical thing is that we recognize and submit to God’s authority. We need to understand
how authority works like the centurion that asked Jesus to heal his servant.

Matthew 8:8-9
The centurion replied, "Lord, I do not deserve to have you come under my roof. But just say the word,
and my servant will be healed. For I myself am a man under authority, with soldiers under me. I tell this
one, 'Go,' and he goes; and that one, 'Come,' and he comes. I say to my servant, 'Do this,' and he does
it."

The centurion understood that he was not the source of authority for his soldiers, but that he
carried the authority of Rome for them. In the same way, we need to understand that we are men under
God’s authority, and who represent God’s authority in our homes.

How to Exercise Godly Authority in the Home

1. Seek God’s will and revelation

 The first thing we need to do as fathers is to try and learn God’s will for our families. Just
because we represent God’s authority, it does not mean that we can set ourselves up as God. In fact, if
we were to do that, we would be rebels ourselves. We cannot lead our families by our own ideas.
Instead, we must pray for God’s revelation. Wives, you can pray for your husbands to hear from
God. We can hear from God as we read the Bible regularly, spend quiet time alone praying to God, or by
listening to biblical preaching.

2. Follow the example of Jesus

Jesus set a perfect example of someone who completely submitted to and obeyed God, and as a
result was given all authority by God. What can we learn from Jesus’ example? That we must be obey
God and not our own desires. Remember how the devil came to tempt Jesus in the desert? Jesus
demonstrated perfect obedience and commitment to doing only the will of God. Jesus showed us how
to submit to God.
God has called fathers to devote themselves wholly to their wives and families. To do this, we
need to learn from the example of Jesus.

Ephesians 5:25
Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her …

Practically, we must be devoted husbands and devoted fathers. We need to turn off the TV or
computer and pay attention to our children. Don’t be like the guy in the song Cat’s in the Cradle. We
need to be sensitive to the feelings and emotional needs of our families—not just providing for them
materially.

3. Maintain a close fellowship with God

We must have a godly fear in us—a recognition of the presence and authority of God. More
than anything, I want my daughter to marry a man who has a close relationship with God and fears God.
This type of man will treat my daughter and grandchildren right, even if I am not around.
When I was courting my wife, I travelled to Malaysia and visited her father in the hospital. At
that time, he was very sick and near death. I knew that I wanted to marry his daughter, and told him
that I would take care of her. I try to never forget that my wife is the daughter of her father. When I’m a
stinker to my wife, I remember that her father entrusted her to me and that I promised to care for her.
Certainly her father would not treat her that way, so what right do I have to do that?
In the same way, we should remember that our wives are not just “ours.” Our families belong to
God, and God is their Father as well. We must show respect for Him by treating His daughters and
children well.
Men who have a close relationship with God will be sensitive to the Holy Spirit, even when they
are in the midst of an argument with their wife. They will listen to the voice of the Holy Spirit urging
them to give up their own rights and reconcile with their wives. The Holy Spirit will never tell us to
remain indignant when our wife offended us or to take revenge through sarcastic and hurtful words.
Instead, he will tell us to treat them as the weaker partner.

1 Peter 3:7
Husbands, in the same way be considerate as you live with your wives, and treat them with respect as
the weaker partner and as heirs with you of the gracious gift of life, so that nothing will hinder your
prayers.

We are under God’s authority and He serves as a mediator and judge between ourselves and
our wives. If both husband and wife are believers, things will go better because God can speak to both of
them. That is one reason why young women need to make sure that they marry a man who fears God.
Romantic emotions fade, but a man who fears God will honor the vows made to the wife of his youth.

Malachi 2:13-16
Another thing you do: You flood the LORD's altar with tears. You weep and wail because he no longer
pays attention to your offerings or accepts them with pleasure from your hands. You ask, "Why?" It is
because the LORD is acting as the witness between you and the wife of your youth, because you have
broken faith with her, though she is your partner, the wife of your marriage covenant.

Has not the LORD made them one? In flesh and spirit they are his. And why one? Because he was seeking
godly offspring. So guard yourself in your spirit, and do not break faith with the wife of your youth.

"I hate divorce," says the LORD God of Israel, "and I hate a man's covering himself with violence as well
as with his garment," says the LORD Almighty.
So guard yourself in your spirit, and do not break faith.

Husbands are to protect and care for their wives and the mothers of their children, not to break
faith and turn away from them. If a man knows God and walks in close relationship with Him, he will
recognize God’s authority over him and submit to God.

4. Leave the fighting up to God

When we recognize our authority is from God, we can leave the fighting up to Him. We are His
servants to do His will, so if our wives and children rebel against us, then they are rebelling against God.
I’m not saying that we cannot be strict with our children or that we must always give in easily to
their demands. What I am saying is that we do not need to defend our authority but trust God to defend
His authority and deal with our wives and children.
Moses was a good example of someone who never defended himself, but left it up to God to
deal with rebels. Instead, Moses often interceded with God on behalf of the rebellious people.
David is another example. See how he left it up to God to defend His authority in the home.

2 Samuel 6:16, 20-23

As the ark of the LORD was entering the City of David, Michal daughter of Saul watched from a window.
And when she saw King David leaping and dancing before the LORD, she despised him in her heart.

When David returned home to bless his household, Michal daughter of Saul came out to meet him and
said, "How the king of Israel has distinguished himself today, disrobing in the sight of the slave girls of
his servants as any vulgar fellow would!"
David said to Michal, "It was before the LORD, who chose me rather than your father or anyone from his
house when he appointed me ruler over the LORD's people Israel—I will celebrate before the LORD. I will
become even more undignified than this, and I will be humiliated in my own eyes. But by these slave girls
you spoke of, I will be held in honor."

And Michal daughter of Saul had no children to the day of her death.

We are given real authority, but it comes from God and not from ourselves. We must act as
representatives of God’s authority, and this means not fighting to protect ourselves. For this reason, I
think it is better for Christian couples to have joint bank accounts. Under no circumstances should the
husband threaten to divorce the wife or withhold good things from her. I also think that pre-nuptial
agreements violate this principle. If it comes to it and the wife does want to divorce her husband, I think
it’s incumbent on the believing husband to give his wife more than what is fair.
How can we carry over this principle to dealing with our children? I have less experience in this
area, but I have been a child for many years.  First, we don’t treat our children the same way we treat
our wives. Our wives are equal partners with us in leading the family, but in complementary roles. Our
children are under our supervision and it is our job to teach them what is right and wrong, and to show
respect.

Proverbs 13:24
He who spares the rod hates his son,
but he who loves him is careful to discipline him.

Proverbs 29:15
The rod of correction imparts wisdom,
but a child left to himself disgraces his mother.

Also, we must remember that our own actions speak much louder than our words. Do we show
them what is right and wrong by our example, or do we lie and break the law when no one will find out?
Do we show our children how to respect authority, or do we speak abusively about those in authority,
whether police or government officials? Do we honor our own parents, bosses, or other authority
figures?
I think we can learn a great deal from the father in the parable of the Prodigal Son (Luke 15).
Notice how this father does not fight against his sons, but rather demonstrates love, devotion, and
mercy—the characteristics that his sons need to learn.