SCHOOL DAYS IN THE 41ST MILLENNIUM

"No, Ahriman, you can't go to the Library for extra credit. Mr. Vect, stop messing about with that
gas tap before you blow us all sky-high, and Thraka, please put Mr. Yarrick down. That's the third
time I've had to ask you to stop that. See me after the class."

"Now does anyone know the answer to the question? Anyone else apart from Ulthran? Mr
Guilliman, perhaps you can stop scribbling in your notebook and tell us the answer..."

"Mr Russ, Mr Jonson, stop bickering right now or you'll both get detention."

"MR.INQUISITOR!!! YOU JUST PURGED THE TRASHCAN!!!" "it was dirty, Miss Jenkins..."
"Why couldn't you have waited? The custodian was gonna come in a minute!" "i couldn't help it,
Miss Jenkins..."

"Typhus, for the last time, there are showers in the locker room for a reason. If you never wash up
you're going to get a fungus or something."

"Fuegan, turn that bunsen burner down. Everybody else has theirs at a reasonable length, why do
you always have to have the bigger flame?"

"Miss Zar, please stop that awful screeching! This is choir class, not the zoo!"

"Now that you have made the first incision... Good heavens Kharn, what are you doing to that
frog?!"

"Leman, you need to get your hair cut, it's longer than the school dress code allows. Don't you bare
your fangs at me, son!"

"I don't care what you say, Aun'shi, cheating on the test is not 'for the Greater Good'."

"No, Emperor, you may not go to the bathroom. I swear child, you already practically live in there!"

"No, Ghazghkull, you may not 'squish da 'umies'. And for the record, it's 'squash the humans'."

"Farsight! Look what you've done now, you've killed the Ethereal? That's time out for you, mister!
And no starting splinter colonies while in the corner!"

"Lucius, What are you doing behind that book? Please put it on your desk like everyone else!"

"Angron! Do you want that knife confiscated?!"

"Mr. Abbadon, please stop saying that your father could have beat Mr. Calgar's father..."

"Mephiston, please stop writing your name in blood on your worksheets! That ink is there for a
reason, young man!"

"Mr. Coteaz, I told you, no more pets at school!"

"Cypher, how many times have I told you? No speeches of redemption during Silent Reading time!"
"Ahriman, stop pestering Russ for answers."

"Kharn put down that-- Good God, Fabius, is that your brother?!?!?!"

"Now Farseer, I'm sure Abbaddon was only joking about the claw..."

"Sanguinus, you come down off that ceiling right this instant!"

"We're going to have to find a separate room for you, Mr Ulthran, if you can't stop reading people's
minds for the answers."

"Mr. Fulgrim! Mr. Lucius!!!! In all my years I have never seen anything..."

"EUGH! Mr. Thraka, did you just eat your own fecal matter...?"

"You are late again, Mr Vulkan."

"Mr Curze, please sign your name as such, and the Gym teacher will not accept you being away
from his class again. You need to get out in the sun like everyone else."

"Mr Luther, you answers arent that good. Why can't you be like El'Jonson?"

"You! Stop looking over his shoulder! Oh, sorry, Magnus..."

"Mr Russ, I shall not tell you again. Do not howl when you know the answer."

Will all students please note the following rules for exams:

1: All farseers, librarians, Tzeentch followers, or psychics of any kind are not allowed to use said
powers.

2: All eldar, the use of wraithbone armor to ask the spirits of its prior users for answers is forbidden.

3: Bolters are not allowed.

4: Silence is a must. Emperor's Children, I am looking at you.

"Slaanesh, what are you doing in that corner!?!?!?!"

"Mr. Nurgle, if you can't control your own bodily processes, we'll have to put you outside."

"Dont listen to Tzeentch, children. He won't give you his pocket money if you kill each other."

"There, there, Emperor, I'm sure you'll get a girlfriend one day. If not we still have those cloning
tanks." (why the Emperor really made the Primachs)

"Mr Macharius, you always go first. Let some one else have a go."

"Mr Straken, burnt tyranids do not smell better than breakfast."

"Mr Creed, if you and Mr Kell do not stop talking in class I will separate you both."
"Mr Redmaw, how many times have I told you to shave? No, I will not accept that Wulfen excuse
any more."

"Mr Azrael, I saw you and Mr Ezekiel passing notes! Is there anything you want to share?"

"No, snow storms created by Rune Priests are not used when considering snow days... especially in
July!"

"Will the Tech Marines and Iron Warriors please stop giving wedgies on fellow class mates, and
blaming it on the Machine God?"

"Mr Ahriman, this is the last time I will tell you to stop bothering Mr Czevak for help..."

"Mr. Perturabo, please do not get angry at Mr. Dorn because he has the correct answers."

"Harlequin Shadowseers - please stop casting Veil of Tears during roll call."

"All Death Guard - please note that I will no longer accept any tardy slips or sick notes from "Big
Papa Nurgle"."

"Ms. Stern, stop purging your book. It's not possessed by Daemons, now sit down or I'll send you to
the headmaster's office."

"Would the Word Bearers and Blood Angel Chaplains please stop bickering? Everyone has their
own opinion on the imperial cree-" *teacher is executed by Yarrick*

Morning announcements:

Band practice has been cancelled due to an amplifier blowout, thanks to the concert put on by the
Slaaneshi Metal band.

Congratulations to the Debate team for another victory; Word Bearers, keep that undefeated streak
going!

Also, the Dodgeball game between the Death Company and the Necons has been canceled; you
both just keep getting back up.

I look forward to seeing all of you at the football game tonight, which we will win by a score of 7-3.
Thank you, farseers, for that early report.

"One last thing, Mr. Abbadon, I want to see you in my office immediately. You will not ruin my Pep
Rally with your little 13th crusade of beer drinking and 'Picking up Chicks'."

"Mr. Cypher, please come out from underneath the table. The Dark Angels are not out to get you."

"Ms. Arienal, stop asking the dead for the answers to the test."

"Mr.Baharroth, how could you possibly be so scared? It's just a field trip to Rhana Dandra."

"Mr.Asurmen, stop bragging that you were the first Exarch. You're interrupting the test."
"When we play dodgeball, I don't want the last two participants to be the Emperor and Horus
again."

"Mr Nightbringer, if i've told you once i've told you a million times, leave that scythe at home!
You'll have someone's eye out with it!"

"Well ... thank you for joining us today, Mr Abbadon! It's good of you to fit us into your busy
schedule! These crusades of yours are not helping your punctuality, young man."

"Mr Coteaz, Mr Horus is not a heretic. His answer is correct."

"Mr. Red Terror, what are you doing with Billy and the hot sauce bottle?"

"Abbadon stop making fun of Horus. If I remember correctly, you and your crusades have not made
it to Terra, now, have they?"

"Can some one please tell me if you have seen Mr Russ? He have been absent from calls for the last
10 thousand years or so and if you see him he still owes the school his fees."

"Ouch, Mr. Bile! That hurt! What did you hittt me withhhhhhhhh...?"

"Horus! You put Sanguinus down right this instant!" "Mr. Dorn, Emperor, return to your seats
immediately!"

Mr Thraka, what did I tell you about eating grots? Don't do it in class unless you brought enough for
everyone!"

"Mr. Ulthran, if you refuse to stop using your powers to cheat on tests, I'm going to have to seat you
next to the Pariah!"