Blackstone Academy Charter

Teen Dating Violence

Star Salinas Sanchez

Senior Research Paper

Tasche Bryant

February 3,2017

Star Salinas:Teen Dating Violence

 While some people may believe that dating violence will not affect them, it's important to

know it can happen to anyone. People between the ages of 15 to 24 experience the highest rate of

dating violence, Colin Adamo, young mens initiative coordinator at Advocate for Youth has

reported. Victims are physically and/or psychologically abused as well as stalked by their partner

and have even been forced to have non-consensual sex. Citizens should teach youth about dating

violence to prevent future abuse and how they can get help for themselves or someone else so

nobody is in danger of being in an abusive relationship. This paper will cover dating violence,

its effect on the victim, and solutions that communities can introduce to try to educate teens to

prevent abuse.

Background

Francine Perry, a domestic violence educator stated in an interview that One in three

girls and one in five boys in Rhode Island will be victims of teen dating violence before they

finish high school(Perry). This is why the month of February is dedicated to teens who have

been victims of teen dating violence. Teen Dating Violence Awareness And Prevention Month,

also know as TDVAPM, began in 1980. TDVAPM and DVAM, also know as Domestic

Violence Awareness Month, do not share the same month because teens have their own unique

challenges(The History of Teen Dating). One of the challenges teens face is demonstrating good

examples of healthy relationships. Most teens get their information on teen dating from social

media which isnt the best example Religion and Violence e- Learning has declared. The month

of February is a time to educate and bring awareness to teens and their parents about the dangers

of dating violence.

1 Salinas
 The problem with teen dating violence is the lack of awareness, conversation in schools,

at home, and in the community. Teens are in danger of getting into unhealthy relationships

because they aren't being taught what is a healthy and unhealthy relationship. Most teens get

their information from the media where most cases men are the powerful ones in the relationship

and women are submissive to them. The Center for Diseases Control and Prevention has stated

that Teens often think some behaviors like teasing and name calling are a normal part of a

relationship(Teen Dating Violence). When the abuse occurs, teens feel embarrassed so they

tend to not tell their partners or an kind of authority figure, so they tell a friend they trust. Love is

Respect, a teen helpline service reported that 82% of parents feel confident that they could

recognize signs if their child was experiencing dating abuse, however 58% could not identify the

warning signs of abuse(Loveisrespect). If only 24 % of the 82% parents can identify dating

abuse, only 375,000 out of the 1.5 millions teens are getting help. Although parents may

recognize the warning signs, but does not imply that they can identify it in their own child's

relationship making it even fewer parents who can identify teen dating violence.

The consequences of teen dating violence can last a lifetime and affect victim's future

relationships. Some short and long term effects that Francine Perry, a domestic violence

educator, listed were, Eating disorders, depression, anxiety, using drugs, alcohol, tobacco and

suicidal thoughts(Perry). It can take a great amount of time for the victim to learn how to live

with the effects of teen dating violence. Victims are also in danger of getting into abusive

2 Salinas
relationships in the future due to the abuse that occurred in high school. Family, schools should

have more open conversations about what is healthy and unhealthy in a relationship.

Section one: What is dating violence?

Dating violence does not discriminate against any teen no matter religion, gender, sexual

orientation, socioeconomic standing, ethnicity, or culture. An abusive relationship involves a

pattern of coercive, manipulative behavior that one partner exerts over the other for the purpose

of establishing and maintaining power and control (Break the Cycle). To maintain power and

control the perpetrator may inflict aggressive behavior which can include verbal, emotional,

physical, isolation or sexual abuse. Some of the actions the perpetrator inflicts on the victim is

hitting, kicking, insulting, humiliating, intimidating, restricting access to birth control or stalking

on social media. This makes it dangerous for teens because they may believe these actions are

caring but it can be the perpetrators way of keeping the victim isolated.

Although there is not an exact characteristic of how these victims ought to be in order to

become affected by dating violence, but there are risk factors that can cause someone to be in an

abusive relationship. For both male and females, low self-esteem is often a characteristic of

adolescents involved in dating violence. Males who have low self-esteem are more likely to

initiate dating violence while females with low self-esteem are more likely to become victims

(Powers and Kerman). Low self-esteem can cause victims to stay in the abusive relationship

because they believe they're not good enough for love from someone else . It is important to

teach adolescents about self love before teens get into relationships because lack of self- love

3 Salinas
makes them more vulnerable to the abuser. Teens upbringing can also be a risk factor that can

lead to dating violence. Studies show that adolescents who experienced greater family

instability, maltreatment, or social disadvantage tend to date at a younger age and experience

dating violence at higher than average rates (Powers and Kerman). Not having a stable

childhood or experiencing violence at home can affect how teens view relationships. Teens can

be influenced by believing relationships are about power and control. However if you have low

self-esteem or family instability it does not mean you will be in a abusive relationship but it does

put them at higher risk of being in an abusive relationship.

The way teens have been taught due to societal norms may affect teens behavior when it

comes to dating violence. Gender roles and dating relationships play a considerable role in the

process of determining behavior patterns among the teenagers (Love Does Not Hurt). Since

birth, society has taught males to be masculine, strong, aggressive, controlling and never show

emotion. Females have been taught to be feminine, pretty, submissive, passive and shy the film

The Mask You live In has stated. These norms have impacted the roles of dating violence making

males more likely to be the abuser and females more likely to be the victim (Newsom).

Eliminating gender roles and teaching adolescence that they need not be masculine or feminine

can help stop roles in dating violence.

Mainstream media can be a great way to spread information but it can also send the

wrong message to adolescents. Mainstream media does not help when there is a lot of pressure

exerted on teens by their peers to look and act in a certain way(Religion and Violence

Elearning). The film The Mask You Live In showed how males see the media portraying females

4 Salinas
in a disrespectful and degrading manner which influence their actions towards women. They see

how women are being treated which influences males to think it's acceptable to control their

girlfriends. Seeing that mainstream media is something teens are exposed to, it should stop

showing sexism, violence, and portraying women in a disrespectful manner.

Section two: Effect on the victim

Getting out of an abusive relationship has been reported to be one of the most dangerous

phases in an abusive relationship, Francine Perry has said. It's dangerous because many victims

of dating abuse are killed by their partner after they have left the abuser(New Choices). For this

reason it's important to have a safety plan and be informed about the resources out there to help

victims of dating abuse. Teens need to be aware that they may have ended the relationship but

there are consequence that follow.

As a result, once the victim gets out of the relationship it leads to consequences that

affect the victim. ACT for Youth Upstate Center of Excellence stated that teen dating violence

can interfere with healthy social development. One of the consequence victims have difficulty

with is establishing caring meaningful relationships and developing interpersonal intimacy (

Powers and Kerman). The traumatic events that occurred in an abusive relationship results in the

victim likely not being able to develop and interact a deeper relationship with others such as

family, teachers, and their community.

5 Salinas
 Furthermore, some of the consequences that affect teens who were in abusive

relationships are both physical and psychological. Some physical and psychological

consequences that affect teens are caused by their lack of experience, desire for independence,

and reliance on support from inexperienced peers(Callahan). This issue makes it difficult for

teens to get the proper help because they are uneducated about the resources available to them or

do not have an adult they trust. Making teens vulnerable, which results in getting physically

pinched, hit, shoved, slapped, punched, or kicked(CDC's Division of Violence Prevention).

Teens also having difficulty differentiating playfulness with violence which can lead them to

further physical abuse. The psychological impacts are name calling, shaming, bullying,

embarrassing them on purpose, keeping them away from friends and family(CDC's Division of

Violence Prevention). Teens are less likely to seek help because they are ashamed of what has

happened to them or do not know where to go or from whom to get help.

Some of the consequence of teen dating violence do not remain in the relationship but

may influence the victim's school performance. Teens connected with dating violence show

decreased attendance and academic performance 20 % of students with mostly D and F grades

have engaged in dating violence in the last year, while only 6 % of students with mostly As

have engaged in dating violence(Duncan). Victims find it difficult to pay attention in school

when they are worried about their partner and what they will do next. If an abuser leaves a mark

on the victim it may stop them from coming to school due to the embarrassment or pain

associated with the abuse.

6 Salinas
 Teen dating violence doesn't stop in high school but can be a lifelong problem if it isn't

dealt with. Perry, a domestic violence educator has said that, Teens experience violence three

times more than adults and find themselves in unhealthy relationship as an adult (Perry). If

schools do not educate their students they may experience a greater risk when they go to college

of becoming easy targets of abuse. It is important to show students how to identify dating abuse

and what kind of help is available to them in the future.

Section 3: Solutions

Some teens are closer to their parents/guardian than others. It takes a great amount of

courage for victims to tell people in authority about the abuse because they are afraid of losing

their trust. Dating Abuse Statistics stated that,only 33 percent of teens who were in a violent

relationship ever told anyone about the abuse(Duncan). This makes it important for authorities

to be understanding of the situation the victim is in and guide them to a safe plan and help them

feel accepted. No matter what relationship authorities have with the victim, they are not to be

judgmental and never blame the victim for the abuse because it is not his/her fault(Love Does

Not Hurt).

Due to teens fear of losing trust from their parents they are more likely to confide in their

peers for guidance about abusive relationships. Furthermore, teens lack of access to wisdom, life

7 Salinas
experience or resources(Love Does Not Hurt) means is hazardous for a victim to get help from

their peers. Most teens are not knowledgeable about the dangers of an abusive relationship or

whom to tell, therefore it is important for teens to be informed about abusive relationships and

how to guide them to a supportive adult. Peers should also learn to be understanding and not

judgemental.

Schools also need to take steps to address the problem of abusive relationships so teens

feel safe and focused on their education. However Arne Duncan, U.S. Secretary of Education

has said that nearly half of all students who experience dating violence say some of the abuse

took place on school grounds(Duncan). Schools should have rules in place to address dating

violence and making it safe for all students. Also teens should be sure that when they speak to

their teachers or an authority they should feel safe and accepted. Therefore schools should have

education programs implemented not just for students,but for the entire school community

including teachers, staff,and parents, all of whom play essential roles in promoting the health and

wellbeing of young people.(Powers and Kerman). In these programs schools can discuss what a

healthy and unhealthy relationship is, warning signs, and resources.

As a community, we should care about each other especially the youth. Obama gave a

proclamation stating that, the cycle of violence can begin with anyone at anytime and as a

society, we must acknowledge that we each have a role to play in teaching children about healthy

relationships(The President of the United States of America). We as a society should bring

knowledge and awareness to our community so no adolescent has to feel the suffering dating

8 Salinas
violence causes. The community should also have resources like a shelter, support groups, or

counselors that empower victims to get out of an abusive relationship.

When programs bring awareness to the community and schools they should be open with

no judgment. When bringing awareness these programs should try to change attitudes about

violence and gender stereotyping, teach conflict management or problem solving skills, and

frequently include activities that increase awareness and dispel myths about relationship

violence(Kerman and Powers). It is important for young people and their parents to identify

unhealthy relationships, warning signs, and how to get help so we can lessen dating violence.

Granted, some parents say it is inappropriate for schools to teach adolescents about dating

violence, sex, pregnancy, and HIV at such a young age. The most frequently cited reasons for

parents and guardian who hold this said its inappropriate to teach children about sex (41%),

followed by it should be the parents choice to teach their own child,(28%), there is no need

for children to know about sex(27%) and the lessons may encourage children to ask more

about sexuality and sex(22%)(BBC). Parents believe that their child will not need this

information because they are young and wont be using the information anytime soon. They

believe information will cause more harm by making adolescents more curious about sex and

relationships which parents blame on the schools sex education classes. However, schools

teaching about dating violence, sex, pregnancy, and HIV can be more educational and taken

9 Salinas
more seriously than when parents teach the same material. Educates can give adolescents in

depth information about relationships without being embarrassed or shying away from topic like

parents. This conversation leaves adolescent with knowledge about relationships rather than

leaving them to wonder and not being safe.

We should teach the youth about dating violence to prevent future abuse and help victims

feel safe asking for help. No person should ever be abused by the person that they are in a

relationship with and made to feel worthless and belittled. There are many hotline services like

No More for victims of domestic violence that they can reach out and talk to. There are also

homes throughout the U.S. for victims of dating violence. Its important that anyone who is

getting into a relationship should be informed about dating violence because it can happen to

anyone despite the person's gender, age, race, ethnicity, or sexual orientation. Youth should be

educated so nobody is in danger of getting into an abusive relationship.

Work Cited

Burnett, Lynn Barkley. "Domestic Violence." : Background, Pathophysiology, Epidemiology.

Medscape, 30 Mar. 2016. Web. 2 Sept. 2016.

Kertsoner, Tom. "Since '94 Law, Domestic Violence down Two-thirds in U.S., Democratic Rep.
Gwen Moore Says." @politifact. N.p., 13 Jan. 2013. Web. 30 Sept. 2016.

"Teen Dating Violence." Centers for Disease Control and Prevention. Centers for Disease Control
and Prevention, 21 July 2016. Web. 11 Oct. 2016.

10 Salinas
The Loveisrespect National Youth Advisory Board. "Dating Abuse Statistics
Www.loveisrespect.org." Wwwloveisrespectorg. Love Is Respect, 7 Oct. 2016. Web. 19 Sept. 2016.

"Learn About Dating Violence." Break the Cycle. Love Is Respect, 04 Nov. 2014. Web. 11 Oct. 2016.

Snyder, Rachel Louise. "No Visible Bruises: Domestic Violence and Traumatic Brain Injury." The
New Yorker. The New Yorker, 30 Dec. 2015. Web. 8 Sept. 2016.

"Facts and Figures: Ending Violence against Women." UN Women. UN Women, Feb. 2016. Web. 8
Sept. 2016.

Perry, Francine. Personal Interview. 4, Oct 2016.

"The History of Teen Dating Violence Awareness and Prevention Month Www.loveisrespect.org."
Wwwloveisrespectorg. Love Is Respect, 16 Jan. 2015. Web. 26 Oct. 2016.

Callahan, M., Tolman, R., Saunders, D. (2003). Adolescent Dating Violence Victimization and
Psychological Well-Being. Journal of Adolescent Research, 18 (6), 664-681

How to Talk About Teen Dating Violence to Your Student Curriculum Review.55,6,9, Feb 2016
ISSN: 01472453

OBAMA, B Proclamation 9393- National Teen Dating Violence Awareness and Prevention Month,
2016 Daily Compilation of President Documents 1-2, Jan, 29,2016. ISSN: 19466986

"Why Doesn't She Just Leave?" New Choices. N.p., n.d. Web. 18 Nov. 2016.

"Teen Dating Violence." PsycEXTRA Dataset (n.d.): n. pag. Web. 19 Nov. 2016

11 Salinas