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    Lorrie Moore Agnes of Iowa

    Copyright:

    © All Rights Reserved
    Download as PDF or read online from Scribd
    Flag for inappropriate content
    384 views9 pages

    Lorrie Moore Agnes of Iowa

    Uploaded by

    김정규
    Lorrie Moore Agnes of Iowa

    Copyright:

    © All Rights Reserved
    Download as PDF or read online from Scribd
    Flag for inappropriate content
    of 9
    ‘grave and encouraged people to call het “On-ye” This was when she was living in New York City, and ofen gecting together with her cousin, «painter who tok her eo parties TaBeCs lof of at beach houses oe at mansions on lakes upstate, She would meee a loc of not very bright rch people ‘who found the pronunciation of her ame neriguing, It was the res of er they were unclear on. "Ones, where are you om, eu?” ssked a blacks slacked, rated tired woman whose skin tra papery and melanomic with suncan, “Originally” She eyed ‘Agoes’ onc as if ic mighe be whac in face i was a couple of bu things purchased in a departmene store in Cedar Rapids “Where ar from?” Agnes said isfy, "Towa" She had a F cendency not ro speak up. Wher?""The woman scowled, bewildered. Towa,” Agnes rpeaced loudly. ‘The woman in black touched Agaes’s wrist and leaned in AGNES OF IOWA confidentially. She moved her mouth in a concerned and ex erated way, lke a ficial exercise. "No, deat,” she std. "Har We sy Obie ‘That had been in Agnes’ mishmash decade fer college Sie had lived improvisatonally then, geting this job ox that, in rtaurnas or efcs; aking a clan oe tw wet thinking too Gar ahead, negotiating the precariousoess and subeay fas and scrimping for an occasional manicure oa ply. Such a life required mach exaggercedslFester, Ie engaged gros qua- ‘ies of hope and despair and set them wildly side by side, ike 4 Third Woeld county of the heart. Her day grew mesty with Contradictions, When she wene for was, fr ber bale, ci- ders would spot her cheeks and soot would sete in the faled leaf ofeach exe. Het shoes became unspeakable. Hee bloutes darkened i a breeze, anda blast of bus exhaust mighe linge i hee hie for hours. Filly, her old asthma returned ad, with 2 hacking, incesane cough, she gave up,“ fel like Ive got five Yeats clive” she rld people, so 'm moving back co Lowa 9 hace fel key Her mee hed given her the mame Agnes, believing chat « tc cikang woman was een mor king when Ber ae ar tomly ne, Her mother was tamed Cyrena, and at Teulsateo march, boc hed always imagined he ie would EEUDGEe more cresting she bref would hve bad» ‘Rae uma, aesting elect onthe wold and nx ended se ol, Tors, if se had een named Enid ot Hagar of Maude: And she named bess daughter Ages and when ‘pater earned et nr tobe acacive tall bar pl and prove cata beeen her eyebrows, he a ac and billows ue, fer mother backpedaed and named ber second daughter Li IE le ho eared ou fo be Tovey sleepy ci with excel Men bone ee fll mouth anda rubbery moe aboe bee Iiptat laterite cold bereaved withou icy ey one ws). ‘ges beelfhad aways been a bit os wih er ae. “henna eet prod in be ifn et iden, whe Teed ced ops off a Prenc—se bad putin he accent When she packed up ro leave, she knew she was saying good bye co something important, which was not eat bad in a try, because fe meane that ac lease you had said hello ro it ro begin with, which most people in Cassell, lowa, she felt, could oe claim to have done. ‘A year and a half ltt, she matted a boyish man ewelve years bet senior, «Cassell restor named Joe, and sogecher they Doug a hose ona il see called Birch Cour, She taught ‘night cas at the Ars Halland did volunteer work on the “Transporation Commission in town, Ke was lifelike las of war halempey, half-full. HalPfll, Halll. Oops: hal “enpy. Ove the years, she and Joe eid have a baby, but one tight se diane, loking at eachother i a lonely way over che meat lof, chey calzed with shock that they probably never ‘would. Nonetheless, after six years, chey sil ried, vandalizing ‘what romance was fe in thee mariage “Honey she would whisper a night when he was reading ‘unde che eadng lamp and she had alteady put her book away tnd curled toward him, wanting to place che ed scarf over the lump shade but koowing Ie would atuny him and 0 ot doing fe "Dp you want to make lve? Ie would be a good time of ‘month, "And Joe would groan, Or he would yawn. Or he would already be asleep. Once, ater long, hard day, he sid, “Fm Sorry, Agnes. I gues I'm just nt inthe mood.” She grew enasperated, "You think I'm inthe mood?” she ssid. “I dont want 10 do this any more than you do,” and he Tooked a erin a disgosced way, and ic was two wecks fer chat tha they had the std dawning over the meat loa. "Ac the Arts Hal, formerly the Grange Hall, Agnes taughe the Grea Books class, bu eaghe it loosely, with cookies. She Tether students turnin poems and plays and stories that they themselves had writen; se lec cher use che class heir own, Amuidfine 8 litle time to be creative. Someane once even brought in 2 sculpeuteanelecric one wich blinking lights. ‘After cls, she someimes met with sudenes individually. She recommended things for them to wrice about or red of consider in cheirnexe projec. She smiled and asked if things ‘were going well in their ive. She took an ineres. "You thould be site,” sid. Willard Stalfbacher, che bead ofthe Insertion Department; he was shore, balding ‘musician who liked co ape on his door piceues of famous people he thought be looked like. Evry third Monday, he ‘conducted che monthly departmental mecting—apely named, ‘goes liked co joke, since she dd indeed depare mental “Just becaute is a night course doesn't mesn you shoulda impart standards,” Saufbacher sid in scolding way.“ is pile, tue the word pile Iie’ meaningless, write meinglay across the top of every page.” He bad once taugh at an elemencary school and once a «prison. "fel like T do all he tel wock around here," he added. He had posted sear his office a sign that read RULES FOR THE MUSIC ROOM: 1 wil say in my sae unless sc] permisin vo move 1 lp erg 1 il sen codecs, 1 wll oor bocher my neighbor I will no alk when Me. Seaufbacher i elk, 1 willbe polite co other. 1 wil ing as well as ea, Agnes sayed afer one night with Christa, the oaly black seadent in er clas, She liked Christ oe—Chaisea was smart ‘snd fanny, and Ages sometioes iked vo stay fet with er (0 chat, Tonight, Agnes had decided to alk Christa out of writing sboue vampires all che ime. “Why don't you write abou che thing you told me sbout thar vie?” Agnes suggested, Crises looked a her skepicaly."Whac ching?” “The time in your childhood, during the Chicago rios, walking with your mother through the police barscades.” "Man I lived chat. Why should I want eo wete about i” ‘Agoes sighed. Maybe Chita hada poe. Ie’ just hat Tm fo help co you with tis vampire stuf” Agnes si, Tes for ‘mula, genre Beton. “You would be of more help co me with my clad?” Well, with moe serious stories, yes. CChista stood up, percurbed, She grabbed back her vampire story, "You with all your Alice Walker and Zora Hurston. Fm just not interested in tha anymore. I've done tha already. tread thse books years ag ‘Chriss, please don't be annoyed.” Place do mt tall when ‘Me. Stanfachr i clling "Youve got this agenda fr me.” ‘Really, 1 don't at all” atid Agnes. “Tes just chat—you now what it is? Tes chat Fm jase sick of ehese vampires. ‘They're 1 roaming and repeating. Ifyou wete Back, what yu re saying might havea dif ev spi. But the fact is, you're not,” Christa sad, and picked fp Her coac and urade Uuw—shough tem seconds later, she fgamely stuck her head back in ad suid, "Sce you next week.” We ned a visiting writer who's black,” Agnes said in the next depart mencal meeting, “We've sever had ove.” They were Tooking at ther budge, and che readings chis yar were pitted against Dance Insertion, a program headed up by aredhesd tamed Evergreen. “The Jlfey is just so much central casting,” suid Eve: areen, apropos of nothing. As vacuum cleaner ca stare ro pall ‘op the acta thread of carpe, her brains had been sucked dey by eo much yogs No one puid much attention co he. Agu fiowe 8 Pechaps we can gee Harold Rafeson in Chicago,” Agnes suggested. ‘We've already gor somebody forthe visting writer slog,” said Seaubacher coy. “An Afrikaner from Johannesburg. “What?” said Agnes. Was he serious? Even Evergreen backed our a laugh "W. S. Beyerbach, The univesty’s bringing hi ia. We ‘ay our Bive hundred dollars and we gee him out hee for a day anda hall, “Who?” asked Evergreen. “his has already been decided?” asked Agoes. "Yup." Saulbucher looked accusingly ac Agnes. "Te done ‘loco work to arange fr this. ov done all ehe work! “Do les," suid Evergreen When Agnes frst met Joe, they'd ilen madly upon each othe ‘They'd kissed in estarans they'd groped, under coats, athe movies. At his litle house, they'd made love on che porch, of the landing of che staircase, against che wall nthe ball by the door to the ai, led wich too much deste co make thee way [Now they struggled sel-conscouily for atmosphere, some thing they'd never needed before. She prepared the bedroom cael. She played quiee music and conceneaed. She li ca ales—as if she were in church, praying forthe deceased She once Blmy gown. She cook hot baths and entered the be room in nothing but a towel, a wild Slike crestute of mois perfumed heat. In the nighttand drawer she sill kept the sa doctor once tld te co kep, sill placed an Xn any ate she and Joe acualy had vex, But she could never show these coher doctor; not now. Ie puined Agnes tose them. She ike dios. She aod Joe looked dead Frantic candlelight Gickered on the cling like « puppet show. While she waited for Joe to cme out ofthe bathroom, “Agnes ly back onthe bed and though about her week, the blondy polities of it, how she was noe very good at politics (nce, before he was elected, she had gone o «rally for Bll Clineo, bu when he was late and had kepe the crowd waiting facoveran hour, and when the sun got hot and bees began land Jing on people's heads, when everyone’ fee hure and tin chil dren began to cry and a state asiemblyman stepped forward ro announce that Clinton had stopped ata Daley Queen in Des “Moines a hae was why he was late—Dairy Queen!—she had ‘grown angry and resentful and apolitical in het own sweet- starved thts and she'd joined in with some ocher people who Jha started ro chant, “Do us favor, tll us the favor.” ‘Through college she had been afeminist—bsicaly: she shaved he legs, bt jut mit fo enw, se liked to s3). She figned day-care pections, and’ peiion for Planned Pareat- hood. And although she had never been very aggressive with ‘men, she fle srongly chat she knew the difference berween feminism and Sadie Hawkins Day—which some people, she believed, did noe ‘Agnes, ate We ut of toothpaste ris this ie oy kay, I ‘And once, in New York, she had quxocically organized che ladies room linea the Brooks Atkinson Theatre. Becsuse the play was going co tare any minute andthe line was sill wenty women long, she had gotten six women to walk across the Tabby with hee to che men’s com, “Everbody out of there?” shed alled in timidly, allowing che men to fish up fst, which cook awhile, especially with other men coming up imp Senely and cutting ahead in lin. Later, at icermision, she s2¥ how it should have been done. Two elderly black women, wich renter expertise in civil right, sepped very confidently into the men's room and called out, “Don't mind ws, boys. We're ‘coming oni, Dont mind Ame fine 83 “Are you okay?” asked Joe, smiling, He was already beside her He smelled sweet of sup and minty cet, like a child thinks" she sid, and turned toward him in the bot= ello lighe oftheir oom. He had never acquired the look of ‘macutcy anchored in sorrow that burnished so many men's faces, His own sadness inlife—a childhood of beatings,» dying smother—was like quicksand, and he had eo stay awry fom i entirely. He permitted no unhappy memories speken load. He sac wih che same mild cherfuloes he'd honed saccessfally 52 boy, and it made him seem fervour even, she knew, himself. Probably ie hare is busines alee. "Your mind's wandering,” he suid, letting his own eyes clo. know.” She yawned, moved her legs onto his for warmth, and inthis way, wth che candles burning into chistes, she and Joe fl alep, ‘The spring arrived cool and humid, Bulbs cracked and sprouted, sho up thee green periscopes, and on April ist he ‘Arcs Hall offered a joke teceue by TS. Et, visting sola "The Croelese Month” ic was called "You don’ find that fanny?” sakedStaulfbacher ‘Apel fourth was the reception for W. 8. Beyesbach, Thee was tobe a dinner afterward, and then Beyerbach wa to visit }Agnes’s Great Books class. She had assigned his second col lecion of sonnes, spae and elegant things with sighing id diaphanous politics. The next afternoon there was to be a ing, ‘Agnes had not been iavited to the dinner, and when she ked about this, in a mildly forlorn way, Sealfbacher ohrugged, as if ic were roclly out of his hands I'm aplibad “Agnes wanted sa. She bad published a poem once—i he Gizzard Revie, but il! Ie was Edie Cane’ is.” Sache. “Tad soshing todo with She weno she wecepton ayy, nays nd when she plage esl like spayed and oem-orm ee fea he peek could actual el he cher he wo ating for Sng bed pein er mouth and sb Became aa ose Whee ihe Elly coded benl o.W. 8. Beyctach, the ambled on her oun name and sully pronounced i oye: ‘er yea" repented Beyeinch in «quiet English vice Condeccoing, te thought. His hr was ood and white, Ste palomino, and sees were lead crf a mis. She could ree ware withheld man ath some might {Dy sh decd ews wil lck of gerry. Pave

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