Peer Review: Research Outline/Draft 1

Reviewer: Isela Pena

Reviewee: Araceli Rodriguez


Directions:
Look at the content of your peers outline/draft. Make marginal comments and a summative
comment for the author of the paper which you are reviewing. Carefully consider the authors
implementation of the P.I.E elements in each of their slices. Also consider how and why they
need to be changed. BE CLEAR about what you are saying and why you are saying it.

Keep in mind the following (but also include things you think should be added):
Does each P.I.E element do what it is supposed to in each of the slices?
Does each slice have only one flavor? (is the slice talking about more than one thing?)
Is each slice placed logically within the paper?
Did you understand the content of the slice as it was presented? Tell the author what you did
understand and didnt.
Are the slices understandable for an outsider? Explain what the author can do to make it more
understandable.
Did you understand the content of the paper as a whole? (Is this an effective research paper?
Explain)

Write detailed and helpful comments that will help your peer consider how to better shape their
slices to make a well formed research paper.

Prompt

1. Extended Response: In an academic voice, discuss the most/least important skill (particular
ability or expertise) or idea (understanding or awareness) that can be gained from this course by
an outsider student considering the readings which have been completed.

You may discuss:
Why one reading is more important than another based on the ideas presented in those
readings.
A particular unit within the course.
A critique on a major assignment within the course.
Other (See me for approval)

Format and Requirements

1300-1700 words, 12pt Times New Roman, single spaced, 1 inch margins.
 Proper title and MLA header.
Correct comma use and sentence boundary awareness.
Use MLA format (8th edition) for in-text citations.
A works cited page is required.
You must use Detached Impersonal Style for the entire paper.
Quotes may be no longer than 3 lines.

Summative Comments:
Pie 1.
-First i in pie might be too long
- On the p you say ML students must work harder; however, your quote shows things all writers
should do. I dont think this shows that ML students work harder because this is something all
writers consider.
- If you want to use this p you should choose a quote that shows how a ML student work harder;
for example, ML students might need to go out and look for extra help in their writings such as
the writing center, ask peers for more feedback, etc
2.
-Since you are writing about students lacking authority you can include why its important to
write with authority and further explain why students should adapt to this.
3.
- For this pie what strategies are you talking about on your quote
- I believe you have an error in the last sentence in the quote she she
Overall, your outline is good but needs some work. I believe some of your quotes are not as
strong and should further explain how these readings can help specifically a ML student. Your
thesis is focusing on ML students but your outline and quotes seem like its also for non ML
students. You can also consider how adapting to college writing is important and how these
readings will benefit them in future writings. You might also want to expand you have room for
more claims.