THINH NGUYEN, A SOPHOMORE
CHEMISTRY MAJOR FROM VIETNAM,
STUCK BETWEEN
TWO SOCIETIES
THE DIFFICULT STRUGGLE OF BEING AN
LGBTQ+ INTERNATIONAL STUDENT
BY QUANG DO
watched a movie scene when he was younger during which a man
performed CPR on another man who was drowning. He did not
know it was an emergency procedure but simply thought that the
two men were kissing.
“At that moment, I kind of knew, maybe, there was something
wrong with me,” he said. “I’m not really normal like other people.”
Coming out to his family was no easy task. In fact, Nguyen had to
tell his mother twice. He was in high school at the time, and in
response to him coming out, she said, “you are just confused.” The
second time, she blamed it on “hormones surging up and down”
and believed her son would be “normal” again. Nguyen said that
his mother knows but she is still in “[a] state of denial.”
I also spoke with a Junior Architecture major from Africa, who
wished to remain anonymous. He came out to his mother when
she visited him in the United States. He was dating someone and
decided not to hide it from her. He was scared at first, but luckily
she was sympathetic to his struggle to accept his true identity.
Many countries, including Thinh Nguyen’s home country and the
home country of the Junior Architecture major I spoke with, have
very strong opinions regarding the LGBTQIA community, and it is
by no means an easy topic to discuss. Some societies consider it
taboo, which represents the community negatively and discour-
ages its members from speaking out. “We are a group that is
ostracized by society because we’re different from the binary
definition [male and female] of gender,” Nguyen said.
Despite the ostensible challenges, “sexual orientation is one of
the most important aspects of my identity,” said the Junior Archi-
tecture major. But, because of the difficulties of embracing his
identity, he experienced depression in his teenage years. He kept
his feelings to himself, and overcame the difficulties of sexuality
without the help of anyone else.
Both Nguyen and the Architecture major are afraid to speak to
their fathers. Men tend to be more intolerant of homosexuality and schools seems to reinforce a less tolerant culture with respect to
many come from a different generation, which is not as educated LGBTQIA individuals. Both continued violence and the rollback of
about this topic. Some even think that LGBTQIA individuals are just federal protections make being LGBTQIA in America difficult, not
transgender people who want to change their physical appearances. least for international students, who sometimes may also face
Moreover, for Nguyen, Vietnamese traditions put pressure on him as xenophobia and racism.
the oldest son to take care of the whole family. “Being gay is like
dropping a bomb on my father,” he said. For the Junior Architecture major, the Orlando shooting in a gay
nightclub last June that killed 49 people made him feel
intimidated. “Maybe America is not that open, [and] we need to be
IN VIETNAM, NGUYEN WAS STILL careful,” he said. “Seeing it happen made me want to step back.”
ABLE TO BE HIMSELF AROUND Both international students have never been directly attacked,
and Temple University feels like a safe home, Nguyen said. He was
his high school friends, but the bias from his family made him
able to experience American dating, and said “it was more
hope for a more liberal environment in America. In the United
challenging.”
States, LGBTQIA international students feel more free when
talking about sexuality. They are even offered help and guidance
whenever needed. But liberty in America unfortunately also For the Junior Architecture
means the freedom to express homophobia. RIGID ATTITUDES IN THE major, he was encouraged
by his boyfriend to partici-
HOME COUNTRIES OF pate more in the community
INTERNATIONAL LGBTQIA and ended up joining Queer
People of Color last year, a
STUDENTS MAKE IT campus organization that
united LGBTQIA+ individuals
ESPECIALLY DIFFICULT, IN of color. His favorite class is
WAYS THAT DOMESTIC “Gender in America” in
which he is able to freely
STUDENTS MIGHT HAVE A express himself and talk
about gender issues.
HARD TIME UNDERSTANDING.
Temple also provides gender neutral bathrooms in buildings on
campus. The Wellness Resource Center provides counseling and
harassment resources to make LGBTQIA students feel safer. Events
and academic scholarships are offered to LGBTQIA students to
guide them in their education and professional careers. These
programs encourage other students to be involved with the
Nguyen reads the newspaper a lot and is frequently upset with LGBTQIA community.
the many violent incidents that have been specifically directed at
LGBT individuals. To make matters worse, President Trump’s recent Both Nguyen and the Junior Architecture major believe that
revocation of federal protections that let transgender individuals Temple has done its best to help LGBTQIA students. Temple is
use the bathroom that matches their gender identity in public filled with diverse and open-minded students and professors.
They are highly educated on LGBTQIA issues, and it makes those
in the community feel included and safe.
However, as Nguyen said, “college is different from real life.”
Homophobia still persists in society, and college cannot fully
prepare LGBTQIA students to deal with people who harbor
homophobic and discriminatory beliefs. Additionally, rigid
attitudes in the home countries of international LGBTQIA students
make it especially difficult, in ways that domestic students might
have a hard time understanding.
can help, and can have important conversations with students like
them. Over time, as they immerse themselves in American culture
and expand their network, LGBTQIA international students will
hopefully remember Temple as a place where they were able to
express themselves freely, and will maybe even consider it their
second home.

The challenge for LGBTQIA international students is much more

complicated as they have to conform to two different societies.
Some are drawn back by the negative preconception in their
home countries and have a hard time adjusting to the environ-
ment in America. As they come back, the reverse culture shock
effect happens as they experience discrimination again. Still, the
most important thing is acceptance from family. Facing his
parents is no easy task, but Nguyen believes that one day he will
be able to persuade them. “I think I can, when I grow a bit older
and have more authority,” he said.

Here, at Temple University, LGBTQIA international students are

safe. They are living among a diverse community that is willing to

FACING HIS PARENTS IS NO EASY TASK,

BUT NGUYEN BELIEVES THAT ONE DAY HE
WILL BE ABLE TO PERSUADE THEM.
welcome and get to know them. Of course, international students
are more cautious when they enter a new environment, but
seeking a community that suits them is the best choice they can
make. LGBTQIA people should participate in campus organiza-
tions that represent their identities, especially their gender identi-
ties. By doing so, they can create connections with people that
 WHEN WE WERE KIDS, WE MAY HAVE
BELIEVED THAT THE RELIGION WE
grew up practicing was in some ways superior to others, even if
we didn’t understand why. Additionally, in some cases, if you grew
up in a non-Christian religion in a Christian majority community in
the United States, you might have even been afraid to talk about
your religion. I was a little bit of both.

When I was a bit older, in fifth grade, I studied the

Constitution–the First Amendment of which guarantees religious
freedom. I understood that there must be no superior or
subordinate religion if our Founding Fathers intended for all
people to have the right to practice whatever religion they
pleased.

When I was old enough to understand news headlines, I realized

that the First Amendment isn’t as clear to everyone as it seemed
to me. I was shocked when I learned that practicing some Native
Americans rituals was only “legalized” in 1994. I was shocked that

FIGHTING
our country allowed a Muslim woman to be pepper-sprayed and
attacked just because of her faith. I was shocked that secular
humanists were denied representation at the interfaith memorial
following the Boston bombings. From the original inhabitants of
this great land to the most recent immigrants, it seemed that no
one was safe from some sort of discrimination.

RELIGIOUS
These are just a few examples–history has seen a lot of
unwarranted religious intolerance, and stereotyping religions
remains a common way to judge people. Labels of religious
identity are used to judge a person instead of their personal
integrity and character.

INTOLERANCE However, we can’t blame our intolerance only on the government

or who’s running the government. Religious intolerance is just as
much a community issue as it is a personal matter. A belief of
religious superiority, the idea that one religion is more righteous
or is inherently better than another, can start as a harmless
BY AMULYA MALLU assumption. However, if we don’t become aware of our practices,
it can result in a dangerous intolerance.
Our concern therefore shouldn’t simply be a politician’s
infringement on religious freedom. The greater challenge is
realizing that the enemy lies within us, and within the
assumptions and misconceptions of the religious groups to which
we don’t belong. We must look to ourselves and use our power as
a whole to leave intolerance behind.
Today, there are many ways to do so, but a personal exchange of
religious understanding is especially important.
THE GREATER CHALLENGE IS REALIZING THAT THE
ENEMY LIES WITHIN US, AND WITHIN THE
ASSUMPTIONS AND MISCONCEPTIONS OF THE
RELIGIOUS GROUPS TO WHICH WE DON’T BELONG.
For instance, as an Indian, even though I grew up mostly in the
United States, there was a part of me that for some reason was
resentful of Pakistani Muslims. It was almost like an expectation:
your country has a terrible history with them, therefore, you must
hate them.
The United States is going through a similar phase (but with
greater consequences), where individual actions of
non-representative members of a religion have come to define
that religious or cultural group. Our history with these religious
groups is thus defined by a few negative interactions, and
completely ignores the overwhelmingly positive interactions that
we share in the present.
One of my best friends today is from Pakistan and one of the
things that brought us together was talking about our faith and
our countries. We realized that we had to draw the line between
disliking individuals because of their personality and blatantly
hating a group for their beliefs. I liked her because I understood
her. I understood her because I took the time to interact with her.
There are many people trying to provide this understanding.
Temple’s Muslim Students Association, for example, hosted Islam
Awareness week to publicly discuss the multi-faceted aspects of
Muslim life. This week is used to raise awareness of the true ideals
of Islam and destroy false stereotypes against the religion. Given
the society we are living in, this event and similar events are more
important now than ever before.
While many people, including me, believe that Islamophobia is
irrational and outrageous, the way to combat it is not by
disregarding and belittling individuals that hold that hatred.
HOPEFULLY, OUR COMMUNITIES CAN COME TOGETHER
AGAIN IN BIGGER WAYS TO REDEFINE THE ROLE OF
RELIGION IN OUR SOCIETY.
Instead, we have to continue to welcome them to engage with
our religious beliefs, and show that we are much more similar
than we may have previously imagined.
Hopefully, our communities can come together again in bigger
ways to redefine the role of religion in our society. But, it involves
all of us being willing to open our minds and hearts to those
around us, especially to those who are different.