Vega 1

Tenisha Vega

Professor Batty

English 101

28 May 2018

Ethnographic Reflection Essay

My second essay, “Los Angeles: The City of Artistic Love” was another piece I enjoyed writing.

Professor Batty gave me wonderful critiques on my love for the Los Angeles. However, I needed to be

more detailed in my writing, and to have deeper thoughts. In my introduction paragraph, I decided to

add more sentences explaining my love for the city. I also took out some sentences that did not fit. In

my first body paragraph I thought I discussed all the points needed and only changed around a few

grammatical errors. The second body paragraph is where I added a lot more detail. I talked more about

the urban style and the inspiration from the different cultural backgrounds we see all over Los Angeles.

My last body paragraph I elaborated more on Jacobson quote on giving up. I inserted a few more

sentences in the first part of the paragraph and deleted others. Closest to the end of the paragraph I

talked about how I am a hopeless romantic and moving to Los Angeles to find love was one of the

reason why I moved out here. I talked about how I am going to take Jacobson’s advice and give up on

dating, but not love. I made sure to check for grammatical errors and run on sentences.