Ari Venteicher EDUC 671 1

Autoethnogrpahy
Ari Venteicher
EDUC 671
Summer 2018
Ari Venteicher EDUC 671 2

Sunday evenings in my family were for watching the Showtime at the Apollo together

and for presenting our research on Black history in our Sunday’s best to our parents as

if they were judges in a local Toastmaster’s competition. My mom and dad would give

my brother and I one week to individually research a historical Black person or event

and design a corresponding Powerpoint presentation. We were fluent in Microsoft

Powerpoint and other Microsoft programs thanks to our parents’ personal mission of

teaching us the “history of our people” and making us computer literate.

My parents always told us that they were working hard so that we could have a

better life than they did growing up. My mom, who has her Master’s in Management

Information Systems, is an IT specialist who would only allow us to play computer

games purposed for increasing typing speed. My dad served in the military for 20 years

and obtained a Bachelor’s degree upon retiring in General Business. My parents made

higher education appear as the only course for my brother and I after high school and

we worked extremely hard to become well-rounded students to be accepted into the

universities of our dreams.

My dad’s profession was his passion. He was a champion for equal opportunity

in the workplace. He is probably the reason why I grew up believing that diversity is

one of America’s greatest assets; however, it is an under-appreciated and undermined

asset. My parents took education seriously and they took our Black history knowledge

even more seriously. My dad loved history and would stay up with me as I completed

my homework sharing with me the impact certain laws had on the Black community

and what key historic Black people and narratives were left out of my school’s

textbooks.

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My younger brother and I grew up with Black history memory games, flashcards,

and a basement library where we would read about people like Daniel Hale Williams,

George Washington Carver, Shirley Chisholm, and Mary McLeod Bethune. Although I

was extremely proud of my African American heritage and Black identity, I felt like in

school I had to arduously prove my blackness.

At school people tried to redefine me as every identity but Black. For some

reason my peers could not fathom an academically achieved African-American. My

peers would dub me “honorary Asian” and compliment me by stating “I’m smart for a

Black girl.” I would go home tired and frustrated that my behaviors and characteristics

that were not seen as “Black” or “Black enough.” I felt like I was being robbed of my

racial identity as people tried to redefine me. Even my Black peers would try to drive a

wedge in between our similarities by reattributing my speech patterns and behaviors.

“You talk like a white girl.” “You act like a white girl.” Those words stung. I could not

understand then why my positive traits were only seen as attributes of White people. I

knew more Black history than they ever were exposed to. I prided myself in the history

of my people, and just because I arduously pursued academic success my peers

wanted to classify me as non-Black as if academic achievement was not in the list of

possibilities for African-Americans.

There were times I would cry out to my dad, feeling frustrated. I always felt like I

had to work extra hard to prove a point to everyone that I am proud to be an African-

American and that academic successful was not limited by race. I felt like I only had to

prove this because I was a minority. All of my positive attributes were classified as

White characteristics by my middle school and high school classmates. This hierarchal
Ari Venteicher EDUC 671 4

classification was consciously or subconsciously a product of racist discourse by my

peers (Hollins, 2008, p. 27).

All of my rigorous academic achievements were reaping more judgement. I

remember stretching with the members on my track team and everybody proclaiming

their university acceptance status. I was accepted into every single university I applied

to from Emory to William and Mary. One of the affluent White boys in the group felt the

need to proclaim that my acceptance in William and Mary was just to fill a quota. He

did not get accepted. He also did not consider my SAT scores, GPA, leadership skills,

and dedication to voluntarism. Yet again my race was dragged into the picture, this

time as unfounded evidence that I did not earn my university acceptance. I, like many

other African-Americans who were forced to endure this daily subjugation of race

devaluing, had to choose to accept the words or prove them wrong. I always felt like I

had to be an ambassador for African-Americans and prove that we do not we do not

accept labels solely based on our skin color.

Automatically when you are African-American or any other minority you are seen

as bad and not of the same status as Euro-Americans (Hollins, 2008, p.26). I think that

is why so many of my young peers naturally thought to disassociate me with

“Blackness” or attribute my characteristics to me “trying to be White.” I did not want to

perpetuate or entertain any notions that Black people could not have positive and

desirable characteristics. I started using those uncomfortable interactions as teaching

moments most of my peers stated they were unaware of the harm and racism in the

words they thought were “compliments.” How many minorities are derailed from their

goals by the negative jokes, taunting, and “compliments” of their peers and society?

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I guess my experiences at school were just preparing me for the real world since

school mirrors society (Hollins, 2008 p. 35). I grew to hate labels and classifications

and became known as the person who “had a talent of seeing the good in everyone.”

In my reflection and growth as an African-American woman I was the only one who I

would allow to define my individual identity. My childhood interactions brought me to

this point of clarity and acceptance of multiculturalism (Howard, 2003 p.198). I grew up

in a racially and socioeconomic diverse part of the nation where many minorities were

not taught to love their culture and history like I was. They all strived to be “American.”

My classmate Josue wanted to be called Josh. Other classmates would not be caught

speaking their parent’s language in front of peers and respond to their parents

questioning solely in English. It was a fear of being other. Who is the other in a country

that embraces multiculturalism?

These experiences in my childhood greatly taught my empathy. (Hollins, 2008, p.

7) I never would want any student to feel like they are not able to achieve greatness

and success simply because of their race. I want to be a champion of culturally

relevant pedagogy (Howard, 2003 p. 201) where students feel like their background

and culture matters and it is welcomed in class; however, they are not reduced to

cultural characteristics or stereotypes. I want students to feel connected and

represented in the lessons so that there is consistent evidence that they can achieve

and do not feel like they have to prove their capabilities (Finnan, 2013, p.97) because

accomplishment, belonging, and engagement greatly contribute to school success.

One of the lessons I facilitated for my class was a lesson on the benefits of

being bilingual. 29 out of 30 of my students identify as Mexican or Mexican-American.

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The majority of my students are bilingual. I wanted them to conduct research so that

they could put a name to a concept that is a huge part of their daily lives. My students

are living in a time where they hear negative rhetoric daily that they do not belong, they

are not welcomed, they are criminals, and they need to leave. I would love to conduct a

unit on autoethnographies with my group of 5th graders to get a deeper understanding

of their levels of self-efficacy and have a picture of how they see themselves in a

society that claims they do not belong (Camangian, 2010, p.131). I want my students to

know that they are heard and they are valued because like I understood as a child,

diversity is America’s greatest asset.

Works Cited

Camangian, P. (2010). Starting with Self: Teaching Autoethnography to Foster

Critically Caring Literacies. Research in the Teaching of English, 44.2, 179-204.
Finnan, C. (2013). Perceptions of self and other in the elementary classroom: From
George Spindler's “Roger Harker story” to today's classrooms. Anthropology &
Education Quarterly, 44.1, 94–103.
Hollins, E. (2008). Culture in School Learning: Revealing the Deep Meaning (Chaps
1–3).
Howard, T. C. (2003). Culturally relevant pedagogy: Ingredients for critical teacher
reflection. Theory Into Practice, 42(3), 195–202. JSTOR, www.jstor.org/stable/
1477420.