Mark Twain Quotes

A lie can travel half way around the world while the truth
is putting on its s hoes . Agains t the as s ault of laughter nothing can s tand. Always do
right. This will gratify s ome people and as tonis h the res t. Be careful in your dres s
if you will, but keep a tidy s oul. Better a broken promis e than none at all. By
trying we can eas ily endure advers ity. Another man’s , I mean. Clothes make the man.
Naked people have little or no influence on s ociety. Courage is res is tance to fear,
mas tery of fear, not abs ence of fear. Education cons is ts mainly of what we have
unlearned. Everything has its limit – iron ore cannot be educated into gold.
Familiarity breeds contempt – and children. Few things are harder to put up with
than the annoyance of a good example. He is now ris ing from affluence to poverty. He
is us eles s on top of the ground; he ought to be under it, ins piring the cabbages .
Hones ty is the bes t policy – when there is money in it. I have made a rule never to
s moke more than one cigar at a time. In the firs t place, God made idiots . That was
for practice. Then he made s chool boards . It is better to des erve honors and not
have them than to have them and not des erve them. Loyalty to petrified opinion never
yet broke a chain or freed a human s oul. Man – a creature made at the end of the
week’s work when God was tired. Man is the only creature that blus hes – or needs to.
Man was made at the end of the week’s work when God was tired. Man will do many
things to get hims elf loved, he will do all things to get hims elf envied. Many a
s mall thing has been made large by the right kind of advertis ing. Martyrdom covers a
multitude of s ins . Neces s ity is the mother of taking chances . Nothing s o needs
reforming as other people’s habits . One of the mos tdgndthrgjryjyryj
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s triking differences between a cat and a lie is that a cat has only nine lives .
Principles have no real force except when one is well-fed. Pros perity is the bes t
protector of principle. Such is the human race, often it s eems a pity that Noah…
didn’t mis s the boat. Suppos e you were an idiot, and s uppos e you were a member of
Congres s ; but I repeat mys elf. The more things are forbidden, the more popular they
become. The reports of my death have been greatly exaggerated. The s ecret s ource of
humor is not joy but s orrow; there is no humor in Heaven. The very ink with which
all his tory is written is merely fluid prejudice. There are s everal good protections
agains t temptation, but the s ures t is cowardice. There is no s adder s ight than a
young pes s imis t. Thunder is good, thunder is impres s ive; but it is lightning that
does all the work. To be good is noble; but to s how others how to be good is nobler
and no trouble. Truth is the mos t valuable thing we have. Let us economize it. When
angry, count to four; when very angry, s wear. When in doubt, tell the truth. When
red-haired people are above a certain s ocial grade, their hair is auburn. When we
remember we are all mad, the mys teries dis appear and life s tands explained. When you
fis h for love, bait with your heart, not your brain. Wrinkles s hould merely indicate
where s miles have been.