Drawn

Deeper
Copyright © Brenda Rothert 2016
Published by Silver Sky Publishing Inc.

ISBN: 978-0-9968498-6-9

This book is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places, and incidents are
either products of the author’s imagination or used fictitiously. Any resemblance
to actual events, locales, or persons, living or dead, is entirely coincidental.
All rights reserved. No part of this publication can be reproduced or
transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical, without
permission in writing from the author or publisher.

Cover Designer:
Regina Wamba, Mae I Designs
www.maeidesign.com

Interior Design and Formatting:
Christine Borgford, Perfectly Publishable
www.perfectlypublishable.com

Standalone books
Unspoken
Barely Breathing
Blown Away
Dirty Work
His
Hooked ~ Coming Soon

Lockhart Brothers
Deep Down
In Deep
Drawn Deeper
Hidden Depth ~ Coming Soon

On the Line Series
Killian
Bennett
Liam ~ Coming Soon

Fire on Ice Series
Bound
Captive
Edge
Drive
Release

Now Series
 Now and Then
Now and Again
Now and Forever

Table of Contents

Drawn Deeper
Books by Brenda Rothert

Chapter One
Chapter Two
Chapter Three
Chapter Four
Chapter Five
Chapter Six
Chapter Seven
Chapter Eight
Chapter Nine
Chapter Ten
Chapter Eleven
Chapter Twelve
Chapter Thirteen
Chapter Fourteen
Chapter Fifteen
Chapter Sixteen
Chapter Seventeen
Chapter Eighteen
Chapter Nineteen
Chapter Twenty
Chapter Twenty-One
Chapter Twenty-Two
Chapter Twenty-Three
Chapter Twenty-Four
Chapter Twenty-Five
Chapter Twenty-Six
Chapter Twenty-Seven
Chapter Twenty-Eight

About the Author
Acknowledgements
Kyle
I’d just picked up the pieces when she breathed new life into me. I was half a
man then, trying to balance it all while telling myself I was better off alone.
Foolishly, I thought she was all wrong for me.
But then, from chaos came clarity.

I turned my face to the side, glancing at my reflection in the window above my

kitchen sink. My dark hair had dried in its usual messy style after my shower this
morning, but hell, it’d be messy even if I fixed it, given my habit of running my
hand through my hair unless I had a surgical cap on at work.
I considered shaving the dark coating of stubble on my face, but I would be
in surgery nearly all day today and my mask would cover my face. My patients
tended to care more about their health than my looks, anyway.
“Did you put an apple in my lunch, Dad?” my youngest son, Eric, called into
the kitchen.
I turned away from the view of our backyard pool and looked at the lunch
contents I’d gathered on the kitchen counter.
“Haven’t packed them yet,” I called back to Eric. “I’m about to.”
“Make sure there’s no brown spots on my apple. I ate a brown spot yesterday
on accident, and it tasted like rotting flesh.”
I arched my brows with amusement. “Rotting flesh, huh? You’ve tasted that
before?”
“I can just tell, Dad.” Eric’s voice was so serious and exasperated, I couldn’t
help smiling. I opened the peanut butter and started making sandwiches.
As a single father, I had to get up at five thirty every morning to get my boys
off to school and myself to work by eight thirty. It took that long for me to work
out in my home gym, take a shower, get the kids up and moving, make their
breakfasts and lunches, and drop them off at school.
After my ex-wife Kim left ten months ago, Jordan, Eric, and I had some
mornings where we scrambled to make it to school and work on time. I set my
alarm earlier every day until I got to something that worked.
In the middle of the kitchen, our puggle puppy Hagrid squatted and took a
piss, giving me an unconcerned look that said, “What?”
“Hagrid!” I set down the knife in my hand and ran over to sweep him off the
floor. “You’re supposed to go outside, you asshole,” I grumbled in a low tone.
“We talked about this, remember?”
I opened the back door and set him on the deck, then closed it and went back
to the sandwiches. I’d just finished spreading peanut butter on Eric’s bread when
I noticed a dog hair stuck in the peanut butter. I fished it out with the knife and
continued.
The dog had been a serious impulse decision on my part. Kim had refused all
pets, and about a month after she left, my sons were looking down over dinner
one evening so I took them to the local shelter and let them pick out a dog.
They loved the damn thing so he was staying, but potty training him was a
nightmare. I’d tried diapering him once out of desperation, but he just wiggled
out of the diaper and then shit next to it.
“Dad, where’s my practice jersey?” Jordan yelled from upstairs.
“How should I know? Where’d you leave it?”
“You said you would wash it.” His voice got closer as he ran downstairs and
walked into the kitchen. “But it’s not in the laundry room.”
Shit. I’d forgotten to wash the jersey.
“Sorry,” I said, packing lunch contents into two brown paper sacks. “I didn’t
do it yet.”
Jordan’s shoulders dropped with disappointment. “Okay.”
“Just get it out of the laundry and throw it in the dryer with a fabric softener
sheet,” I said. “It’ll be fine.”
“Dad, did you sign my homework sheet?” Eric asked as he walked into the
kitchen. “Eww, why is the floor wet?” He looked down at his feet and then up at
me.
 “Hagrid,” I said, reaching for the roll of paper towels on the counter and
tossing it to him. “And I signed your homework sheet and put it in your bag.”
“I’ll go change my socks,” Eric said, bending down to take them off.
I looked over at the microwave clock. “Seven minutes.”
It helped the boys if I counted down the minutes until we were leaving. Eric
hustled out of the kitchen, wet socks in hand.
With my remaining minutes, I loaded the breakfast dishes into the
dishwasher and put on the running shoes I wore to work every day. I was on my
feet a lot, so I stuck to wearing running shoes and surgical scrubs.
We loaded into my Range Rover, and I backed out of the garage. I’d made it
halfway down our long driveway when Jordan asked, “Dad, did you remember
to put Hagrid in his kennel?”
I groaned and hit the brakes. “I left him outside.” I pulled back into the
garage, and Jordan volunteered to get the dog and put him in his kennel. That
was the only way to avoid coming home to every shoe in his reach being chewed
up or pissed on.
Jordan ran back outside and we set off, only two minutes behind schedule.
The drop-off line in front of the school was short today, so we made up the time.
“Love you guys,” I said, turning around to look at them. “Have a good day at
school.”
“There’s no brown spot on my apple, right?” Eric asked.
“I gave you a tomato instead of an apple so you wouldn’t have to worry
about it.”
He scrunched his face with indignation. “Dad! Gross. You know how—”
“I’m kidding, E. Have a good day.”
They both said quick good-byes and took off. I turned up Kings of Leon to
get my head clear for the day of surgery ahead.
My hometown of Lovely, Missouri was pretty small, so the hospital couldn’t
keep specialty surgeons on staff. I was a general surgeon, and I’d been handling
general surgery and emergency surgery for years by the time Kim left. I’d been
working long hours, but within a few weeks of being a single dad, I knew
something had to go. My mom had been picking up the boys and keeping them
on the evenings I had to work, which she didn’t mind, but I did.
I’d gone to the hospital’s CEO and told him he needed to hire more surgeons
to cover the seven p.m. to seven a.m. shift. I couldn’t do it all anymore and be
the dad I wanted to be to my boys.
He’d thrown a fit until I told him I was willing to leave the hospital over it.
And I’d meant it. Jordan and Eric needed to know they came first for me. It had
taken me too long to become the father they deserved, and I didn’t want to lose
any more time.
Two new emergency surgeons had started a couple weeks later. When I
pulled into the physicians’ parking lot at Lovely Hospital, the Corvette one of
them drove was double-parked.
Brad Tenleigh was an asshole, though I couldn’t find any fault with his
abilities as a surgeon. But I’d known from the first time I saw his double-parked
bright red sports car with the license plate “ER DOC” that we wouldn’t be
grabbing a beer outside the hospital.
As soon as I walked into my office, my scheduling secretary, Marla, smiled
brightly at me.
“Good morning, Dr. Lockhart. You have three procedures starting at nine,
and then you’re rounding until lunch.”
“Morning.” I took the tablet she held out to me and glanced down at it.
“Okay. Did my lab reports come in?”
She turned to her computer to check, and I felt my cell phone buzz in my
pocket.
“Kyle Lockhart,” I said in answer.
“Dr. Lockhart, it’s Hallie from the school.”
I’d just dropped the boys off fifteen minutes ago . . . surely one of them
wasn’t feeling sick already?
“Hi, Hallie.”
“Jordan forgot his permission slip for basketball open gym. It starts today.”
I held back my urge to swear with frustration. I’d seen it on the kitchen
island and forgotten to remind him about it.
“All right, let’s see . . .” I said.
 “You want me to call your mom?”
I rolled my eyes. Small-town life. “No, I’ve got it. I’ll, uh . . .” I considered
my schedule for the day. I was having lunch with some medical students, and I
didn’t want to blow them off. “I’ll actually run home and get it right now.”
“Okay, we’ll see you soon,” Hallie said.
“I have to run something to the school,” I said to Marla. “I’ll be about fifteen
minutes late with my first patient.”
“Got it.”
Marla had been with me since I started at Lovely Hospital, and she’d taken
to my becoming a single father quite well. She knew how to slide this and that
around on my schedule to make things work. She was a grandma who knew how
to be sweet but firm with everyone, and I knew I’d be lost without her.
She also never offered to help with things concerning my kids, and I
appreciated that. Somehow, she intuitively knew it was important to me that I do
that stuff myself.
I broke into a jog as I headed back to my Range Rover. Some days my best
efforts to get it all done and be on time still weren’t enough. But as long as the
balls stayed in the air, I didn’t worry about how I looked trying to juggle them
all.
Meredith
I didn’t have any tears left. My head pounded with a heavy ache caused by hours
of crying. I’d been unable to sleep last night because I was too consumed with
worry.
The surgical gown had to be open in front, but for now, I was holding it
closed protectively around myself. I’d spent the past few days coming to grips
with many things, including past mistakes.
I’d left Reed Lockhart at the altar. That was my biggest regret. Not that I’d
called off our wedding, but that I’d done it so ungraciously, in a way that left
him hurt and humiliated.
The twenty-one-year-old I’d been back then could only think of getting
away. I’d pushed back my growing worry that Reed and I weren’t meant to be,
telling myself I was crazy. He was a Lockhart. They were pretty much Lovely’s
First Family. Reed was one of five handsome, charming brothers loved by
everyone in town.
As the door to the small exam room opened, I sighed as a reminder of what
I’d done to Reed walked in.
“Hey, Meredith,” Kyle said.
I swallowed the lump in my throat. “Dr. Lockhart.”
A smile played on his lips. “Kyle.” He pulled up a stainless steel stool and
sat down. “So we’re doing a biopsy on your left breast this morning.”
I nodded morosely.
“You okay?” he asked.
I shrugged. “Not really. I’m scared.”
“That’s understandable. Who’s here with you? Your dad?”
I shook my head. “I don’t want anyone to know unless it’s . . .” I sighed
deeply, unable to even say the word. “I don’t like to stress out my dad, you
know?”
 His brown eyes softened, and he nodded. “Yeah. But you won’t be alone,
okay? I’ll be with you the whole time.”
My eyes flooded with hot tears. Even after what I’d done to his brother, Kyle
was being compassionate. I didn’t deserve it.
“How’s your dad doing?” he asked.
I took a deep breath, pushing back my urge to cry. “He’s doing pretty well
since the triple bypass. I can’t get him to stick to the diet, though. He sneaks
food into his desk drawers at the office.”
“The diet’s on him. You’re not responsible for that.”
“I know, but I can’t help trying.”
It had been eight years since my mom was killed in a car accident. My dad
and my sister Lena became my only family that day, and it made me even more
protective of him when I saw how crushed he was after losing my mom.
“How’s Lena?” he asked, putting on a pair of rubber gloves.
“Good. She loves California.”
“Okay if I take a look?”
I loosened the hold of my arms around my midsection, my cheeks warming.
It was time to flash Kyle. I was a tiny bit sheepish about it, but so sick with
worry over the lump in my breast that I couldn’t bring myself to care.
When I opened my gown, his gaze went to my left breast. “All right,” he
said, looking back up at my eyes, “Once we’re in the operating room, I’m going
to give you a local anesthetic before I start. Then I’ll insert a fine needle into the
breast and draw out a tiny sample of the mass for a biopsy.”
I nodded.
“Any pain or discomfort in that area?” he asked, sitting back down and
adding, “You can close your gown back up.”
“No. I felt the lump in the shower last week and went to my doctor, but no
pain or anything.”
“Okay. Any questions for me?”
I shook my head, fighting back another urge to cry. I couldn’t believe I was
getting a biopsy. My dad relied on me to run the business and accounting side of
his car dealership. I was only twenty-nine years old. I had a hope in the back of
my mind that maybe, one day, I’d find love again, though it was unlikely given
my reputation as the wretch who’d ditched Reed Lockhart at the altar.
Kyle stood up. Damn, he was tall. All the Lockhart boys were tall with dark
hair and brown eyes, but he was the tallest. He’d gotten with Kim in high school
and never so much as looked at another woman after that.
“Hey,” I said, looking up at him, “I’m sorry about Kim. That whole thing, I
mean.”
“Thanks. It was for the best.”
“How are your boys?”
He smiled. “They’re good. I was late to our appointment because Jordan
forgot his permission slip, and there may or may not be dog hair in Eric’s peanut
butter sandwich today, but . . . we manage, you know?”
There was such warmth and pride in his eyes that I was taken aback for a
second.
“It’s really amazing, what you do,” I said. “Being a single dad and a doctor.”
He shrugged. “I’m far from perfect. I fell asleep in the middle of Eric’s
reading homework last night.”
I laughed at the image. “Was he reading to you?”
“Yeah.”
“I’m surprised his teacher assigns that sort of homework,” I said, adding,
“You remember I was planning to be an elementary school teacher, right? Before
I found out my dad needed me at the dealership.”
Kyle’s eyes lit with recognition. “Yeah, now that you mention it, I do
remember. Eric’s been having trouble with his grades since Kim left. His teacher
thought reading out loud might help with comprehension.”
“That’s a good idea. And hey, if you ever need a tutor, I’d be glad to help.”
“Yeah? He could use some extra help. I’d pay you, of course.”
I waved dismissively. “Don’t even think of it. I love teaching. I’d enjoy it.”
“I might take you up on it.”
He smiled again, and I realized I wasn’t on the verge of crying anymore. I
took a deep breath and tried to thank him with a smile of my own.
“I’ll see you in there,” he said.
 “Okay.”
As soon as he was gone, my worry came back. I was alone. Not just here, but
in other ways. When I’d moved back to Lovely after a quickie marriage that
ended in divorce, I’d been too embarrassed by my behavior to reach out to old
friends. I heard the talk. After what I’d done to Reed, a lot of people never
wanted to speak to me again.
I understood. My work at the dealership had become my life—I knew every
profit and expense down to the last penny. I’d also taken up running, yoga, and
baking. I only occasionally wished for more.
It didn’t take long for a surgical nurse to come prep me for the procedure.
Kyle talked me through it, his warm, familiar voice putting me at ease. And
when it was over and I got dressed to go, I realized the biopsy wasn’t even the
hardest part. The waiting was.
Kyle
We could hear the laughter inside my parents’ house through the screen door on
the back sunroom.
I opened the door, and Jordan and Eric walked in beneath my arm. As we
made our way into the kitchen, I saw we were the last to arrive for dinner this
Friday night.
My nephew Noah was chasing my niece Alana around the kitchen. My
brother Reed and his wife, Ivy, were talking to our dad. Another of my brothers,
Mason, was carving a roast, his girlfriend April drying her hands on a dish
towel. The last of my brothers who lived in Lovely, Austin, was chasing after
Noah and Alana while his wife Hannah looked on with amusement.
“There you are,” my mom said, walking into the kitchen and hugging me.
Jordan and Eric gave her hugs before running off to the backyard.
“How are you, honey?” Mom asked me.
“Good.”
She looked at me for a second, gauging whether I meant it. My parents knew
I’d struggled to get my shit together after Kim left.
“I’m good, Mom. Really. You need help with anything?”
“No, everything’s just about ready.” She leaned against the counter and
smiled up at me. “Have you heard that Gretchen Palmer’s divorce is final now?”
“Nope.”
“I always liked her.”
“Maybe you should ask her out,” I said wryly.
She gave me a pointed look. “I just think it would be good for you to get out.
All you do is work and take care of the boys.”
I shrugged. “I don’t want to date, Mom.”
“I’m just suggesting—”
“I know. But I’m good.”
 “Have you heard from Kim at all? Does she check on the boys?”
I shook my head. “I’m gonna grab a beer, okay?”
She nodded and pushed away from the counter. Even after ten months, my
mom couldn’t understand how Kim could just leave her children.
I was over it, because I’d lived it. Kim’s glass or two of wine in the evening
had become half a bottle, and then she’d started drinking during the day. I’d
turned a blind eye, too wrapped up in work to consider that my wife was an
alcoholic.
When she left me, Kim told me she felt like she’d missed out on a lot by
marrying her high school sweetheart. By that point, I didn’t even want to fight
her on it anymore. We’d gotten a quick, amicable divorce, and she’d split.
My family had been supportive, but still, I was the odd man out now.
Everyone but me was half of a couple. My youngest brother, Justin, was
unattached, but he was finishing up law school in St. Louis, so he wasn’t home
much.
I’d been the first of the five boys to get married and have kids. But when I
saw the way Reed looked at Ivy, his expression full of admiration and warmth, I
knew they had something Kim and I never did.
“What’s going on, man?” my brother Austin asked me as he approached my
side.
“Just the usual. How about you?”
He shrugged. “I’m much better with tax time behind me. We were working
night and day. I think I prepared a tax return for every individual and business in
Lovely.”
“Hey, my pool’s open if you guys want to come over and swim,” I said.
“You gonna grill me a steak if we do?”
I arched my brows and gave him a light shove. “You get hot dogs this year.
You’re lucky I’m inviting you at all after that ass-fucking I got on my taxes.”
Austin shook his head and smiled. “I don’t make IRS regulations, man. I just
help you follow them so your ass doesn’t end up getting audited.”
“That was bullshit,” I muttered.
“I told you it would happen. But what choice did you have?”
 I’d had to borrow from a retirement investment account to buy Kim out in
the divorce. Buying her half of the equity in our house, plus giving her a lump-
sum settlement, had cost me a fucking fortune. Reed, who was my attorney, told
me I was overpaying, and I’d be better off paying her alimony.
But I’d wanted completely out. All strings cut and nothing to revisit later. I
was only thirty-seven, young enough that I had plenty of time to rebuild my
retirement account.
“You can have a burger,” I said to Austin. “Maybe.”
Mom called the kids in, and we all sat down around my parents’ huge dining
room table for dinner.
I watched my mom buttering rolls and pouring milk for her grandchildren
and felt a warm sense of gratitude for her. I hadn’t known until I became a single
father just now much work went into cooking a meal. And the cleanup was even
worse sometimes.
She’d made it look so effortless when we were growing up that I never
realized just how much work it was. Not just the cooking, but the laundry and
cleaning and keeping up with school and sports schedules. I only had two boys
—my parents had raised five.
My dad knew what he had in my mom. He still looked at her like she was the
only woman in the world, after forty-two years of marriage.
No matter how much they assured me the Kim fiasco wasn’t an
embarrassment to them, I knew it was. My parents were active in the
community, and it had to burn for all of Lovely to watch as their eldest son’s
family crashed and burned.
I hoped like hell Jordan and Eric wouldn’t make the same mistakes I had.
They meant everything to me.
“Kyle, how’s Caroline Cooper?” my dad asked from across the table.
“Good. She’ll be out of the hospital in a day or two.”
Caroline Cooper was an eighty-two-year-old fixture in our small town. She’d
been my second grade teacher, and my father’s, too. A couple days ago, I’d done
surgery on her small intestine, holding my breath the entire time. She was frail
and I hadn’t been sure she’d survive the surgery, but her condition had been
critical.
Part of being a surgeon in my hometown was personally knowing many of
my patients. That was both good and bad. The familiarity often put them at ease,
which was good, but it increased the pressure I felt sometimes.
After dinner, Mom served apple crisp and coffee. Jordan and Eric raved
about the dessert, probably because of my limited cooking skills and nonexistent
baking ones.
“I’m making apple cinnamon pancakes for breakfast tomorrow,” Mom said,
ruffling Eric’s dark hair.
“We’re spending the night?” Eric turned to me, his eyes lit with excitement.
“Well, I hope so,” Mom said. “It’s Friday night. I love having as many of my
grandkids over for my Friday night sleepovers as I can.”
“I didn’t bring clothes for them,” I said.
She waved a hand dismissively. “We’ll manage.”
Reed and Austin both left shortly after dinner to spend a night alone with
their wives. Mason and April did the dishes, and then they took off, too.
I had no plans, but I said good-bye to my boys and went home anyway. The
house was quiet without them there. I went out to the backyard and shot some
hoops on the basketball court and considered getting in the hot tub, but alone?
I’d just be sitting there doing nothing.
Kim had insisted on a lavish in-ground pool, hot tub, and a small guest
cottage out back a few summers ago. Now I was stuck with them. The boys
loved the pool, though, and I paid a pool service to do all the work on it.
I went inside, took a shower, and flopped into my favorite leather recliner in
the living room. It was weird to scroll through the channels on the satellite cable
menu, because usually the boys had something on.
News? Depressing. I kept scrolling.
A Western? Maybe.
Reality TV? Fuck no.
Porn? I stopped scrolling, only considering for a second before entering the
passcode only I knew to purchase it.
The sound of a woman moaning made my cock twitch and swell
immediately.
Hell yeah. She was sucking a guy’s rod, something I’d never experienced.
Kim had told me when we started dating in high school that she tried it on a guy
before me, and it made her gag so she refused to do it again.
But the woman on-screen was taking a pretty good-sized dick like a champ,
her eyes watering as she deep-throated him.
I slid my shorts and underwear down a little and wrapped a hand around my
hard shaft, pumping it as I watched the lucky bastard on-screen get head.
My sex life with Kim had been over for around six months before she left.
For sixteen months, I’d had nothing but hurriedly jerking myself off in the
shower. So this—getting to take my time and enjoy it—was actually a luxury.
There were no faces on the women I fantasized about. They were just eager
and adventurous, doing all the things I’d never experienced.
It was damned embarrassing to be a thirty-seven-year-old, reasonably
attractive man who’d never had anything but missionary sex. But no one but my
brothers and I knew, and they’d never tell anyone.
The man on-screen eased the woman sucking him off into a standing position
and flipped her around, fucking her from behind. He railed her as she moaned
and begged for more.
There was something about a woman being vocal during sex that just made
me lose control. I worked my hand up and down my cock faster and harder,
coming just before the on-screen guy pulled his dick out of the woman and
jerked his load all over her ass.
Damn. I was wishing I’d considered a career as a porn star rather than a
surgeon. Grabbing some tissues from a side table, I cleaned myself off and got
up.
It was close to nine p.m. I decided to go to bed and watch SportsCenter until
I fell asleep. I’d get up early in the morning and go for a run.
Bachelorhood wasn’t exciting, but my time was my own now. I was never
letting another woman shackle me with a wedding ring and then make my life a
living hell. Sex just wasn’t worth the trade-off.
Meredith
Even after five minutes of polite head nods and “hmms,” Al Kellogg still didn’t
get that I had no interest in talking fantasy football with him. But I couldn’t get a
word in edgewise to extricate myself from the conversation.
“Guy’s a machine, you know what I’m sayin’?” He nudged me, and I smiled
weakly.
Several crumbs from the doughnut he was chewing were stuck in his dark,
bushy mustache. This was Al’s morning ritual at Hobbs Auto Plaza—two
doughnuts and a cup of coffee in the company break room while chatting up
anyone in close range. I rarely got into the break room to fill up my water bottle
in the morning without getting trapped in a one-sided conversation with him.
“I mean, say what you will about last season, the guy’s still a legend,” Al
continued. “Fans are so fickle these days.”
Now there was a smudge of pink frosting in his mustache, too. In the past,
I’d politely told him about the food that inevitably ended up in his mustache, but
after one too many “I’m saving it for later” jokes after which he never bothered
to clean himself off, I’d stopped wasting my time.
My reprieve walked into the room in the form of my father and another
salesman at the dealership. As soon as they said good morning to us, Al must’ve
sensed a more captive audience for his monologue because he turned toward
them, and I excused myself.
“Have a doughnut, guys,” Al said as I left the room.
“Don’t mind if I do,” my dad said.
I sighed softly. My dad had been a little winded just from the walk into the
break room. My ever-present worry for him spiked. I couldn’t seem to get
through to him about the importance of his diet after his bypass surgery. He
joked that he’d had his engine refurbished and was good for at least another fifty
thousand miles now.
 I went into my office and closed the door, then settled in for several hours of
working on payroll. Midmorning, my cell phone rang with a Lovely number I
didn’t recognize.
I slid my finger across the screen and answered.
“Hey, Meredith, it’s Kyle Lockhart. I just got your results back from the lab,
and I asked Dr. Tanner if I could call you immediately to let you know the good
news. It’s benign.”
I closed my eyes, my shoulders sinking with relief. “Thank God. Wow, I’ve
been an absolute wreck over this. Thanks for letting me know.”
“Sure thing.”
Our conversation several days ago about his youngest son had stayed with
me.
“Hey, does Eric still need help with homework?” I asked.
“Yeah. The boys could both use help, actually. You don’t happen to know
Spanish, do you? Jordan’s taking a summer class.”
“I know enough to help a middle schooler with it.”
“Really?” He sounded surprised.
“Sure.” I sat back in my leather office chair. “Were you thinking . . . soon?”
“Whenever you could do it. Eric could use help this summer too so he’s on
track when school starts back up.”
“How about tomorrow? I leave work at four, and I could come by then.”
“Perfect. I’ve got an after-school babysitter who’s there until I get home a
little after five. Her name’s Stephanie. I’ll tell her to expect you.”
“Okay, sounds good.” I smiled. “I’ll dust off some of my old teaching
supplies tonight.”
“Great. I really appreciate it, Meredith. I’ll pay you, of course.”
I laughed. “I’m not taking your money. This will be fun for me. I’m glad to
do it.”
Kyle scoffed softly. “Wait ’til you get a load of those two. You might change
your mind. They’re pretty energetic.”
“I can handle it.” My office phone rang, and I remembered the payroll I
needed to finish. “So I’ll see you guys tomorrow, then.”
 “See you then.”
“And thanks again for calling with the results. I can’t tell you how relieved I
am.”
“Good.”
“Bye, Kyle.
“Bye.”
I ended the call and sighed deeply before breaking out into a huge smile. My
prayers had been answered.
My office phone was still ringing. I tried to compose myself so I could
answer it, but I couldn’t. When I blinked, tears spilled onto my cheeks.
I hadn’t realized how deeply the worry about the biopsy results had been
affecting me. And I hadn’t had a single person to talk to about it. My dad would
have wanted to know, but he was supposed to keep his stress level down after his
bypass surgery. I didn’t have close friends because Lovely was a small town and
I couldn’t outrun my reputation as the woman who’d screwed over Reed
Lockhart.
The crying was cathartic. After I got out a small mirror and cleaned the
smeared mascara off my face, I took a cleansing breath and got back to work.
The phone had stopped ringing, but whoever it was had probably left a message
if it was important.
Though I kept busy outside of work with baking, running, and refurbishing
secondhand furniture, I did those things alone. In my most honest moments, I
admitted to myself that I was lonely.
I had too much pride to admit to Kyle Lockhart just how much I was looking
forward to spending time with his sons. I loved kids, and I felt a major soft spot
for Jordan and Eric because of Kim. I’d lost my mom, too, though my situation
was very different. I’d been an adult when my mom died. Their mother had left
them.
I couldn’t make up for that loss in any way, but I knew spending time
together would be good for them and me. It was funny that of all the people to
give me a second chance, Kyle Lockhart was the one to do so. No one in his
family was a fan of mine.
 I’d stop at the store after work and buy new pens and notebooks. I’d always
been a pen and notebook nerd, collecting them in all sorts of colors and patterns.
And maybe a chart to track the boys’ homework assignments—with stickers,
because let’s face it, everyone loves stickers.
Helping the Lockhart boys with their homework would have been a small
thing to most people, but to me, it was a big thing. And now that I had a clean
bill of health, I could focus on something that made me happy instead of
something that ate me up with worry.

Kyle Lockhart had one of the nicest houses in all of Lovely. I’d been here with
Reed right after Kyle and Kim finished construction and moved in, but that had
been a long time ago. Things between Reed and me had been over for eight
years now.
The massive two-story brick home and professionally landscaped yard were
immaculate. It looked like a photo out of an architectural magazine, whereas I
was used to my small, shabby chic bungalow.
When I knocked on the tall, dark wood front door, a girl who looked high
school-aged answered it.
“Hey,” she said, smiling. “Are you Meredith?”
“Yes. Stephanie?”
She nodded, stepping aside so I could enter. I remembered the dark wood
floors from my first visit here all those years ago, but everything else was
different now.
A table in the entryway had a basketball in a glass case on top of it. An
engraved plaque on the case said it was from a championship college game,
likely one Kyle played in. All the Lockhart boys were amazing basketball
players.
The walls had photos of the boys and Kyle. They were on a fishing trip in
one, all three wearing goofy fishing hats covered with lures and grinning.
I remembered there had been a big watercolor painting of a beach over the
fireplace in the two-story great room. Kim had bragged about having it
commissioned by some famous artist. Now there was a huge team photo of
Kyle’s college basketball team. He looked so young in it, his face leaner and
clean-shaven.
“Guys, come downstairs,” Stephanie called up the open staircase.
I heard a groan. A few seconds later, the boys came walking down the
staircase, both looking less than thrilled.
“We just started our game,” the older boy, Jordan, said. “I can do my
homework later.”
“That’s not what Dad said,” Eric said, giving him a serious look.
Stephanie sat down in front of the coffee table, where she had her homework
spread out. She texted away on her phone, oblivious to the conversation around
her.
“I’m Meredith,” I said to the boys. “Jordan, I met you once when you were .
. . two, I think.”
“Really?”
“Yes. I actually came over to your house once. I was . . . a friend of your
uncle Reed’s back then.”
“Oh.”
“But that was a long time ago,” I said. “I haven’t talked to him since before
he married your aunt Ivy.”
“I love Aunt Ivy,” Eric said.
He was a solemn boy with medium brown hair that curled a little on the
ends. Jordan’s dark hair was cut short. They both had the big, brown Lockhart
eyes and good looks. These boys were miniatures of their father.
“Have you guys had a snack?” I asked. “I brought some cookies I made last
night.”
“Cookies?” Eric arched his brows with interest.
“What kind?” Jordan asked.
“They’re called monster cookies. They have M&M’s and peanut butter in
them.”
Jordan shrugged. “I’ll take one.”
“Great.” I patted the canvas bag I carried over my shoulder. “They’re in here.
Let’s go into the dining room, and while you guys get out your homework, I’ll
set up milk and cookies.”
Eric ran toward the kitchen. Jordan gave me a skeptical look but followed
me.
“How tall are you?” Jordan asked as I opened kitchen cabinets to find a plate
for the cookies.
“I’m five ten.”
“That’s tall for a girl.”
“Yes, it is.” I found a plate and set it on the counter.
“You play basketball?”
“I played basketball and volleyball in high school.”
“Cool. How old are you?”
I arranged the cookies on a plate and searched for cups for the milk. “How
old do I look?”
“I don’t know. Twenty?”
“I’m glad I brought you cookies. I’m twenty-nine.” I smiled. “So what are
you learning about in school?”
He shrugged. “Pyramids. And how to add fractions.”
“What’s your favorite subject?”
“Gym.”
I poured two cups of milk, picked up the plate and inclined my head toward
the dining room.
Eric already had his homework out. I scanned over the assignment sheet
from his teacher, smiling when I saw Kyle’s illegible, doctor-ish signature in
every box for parents to sign off on.
“Let’s start with your math,” I said to Eric. “I rock at grade school math.”
“Let’s start with the cookies,” he said, lowering his brows so seriously I
almost laughed.
“Good idea,” I said, sliding the plate toward them. “Cookies first.”
Kyle
I was on the way home from work, about to turn from Main Street onto the road
my house was at the end of, when I saw Ray Turner and slowed down.
Ray was a sixty-something man who spent his days driving around Lovely
on his riding lawn mower. He had a cart attached to the back of the mower that
he used to transport groceries and metal he scrapped for money. The temperature
was in the mid eighties today, and Ray had sweat rolling down his face.
I slowed the car and pushed the button to roll down my passenger side
window.
“Hey, Ray,” I said.
“Doc.”
“How you doin’?”
“Can’t complain.” He gave me a toothless smile.
“You want to stop by and get some water?”
“Nah. I’m meeting the boys for a beer.”
“All right. Take it easy, man.”
He waved and I rolled up my window, waiting for him to cross my street on
his mower before I turned onto it.
Stephanie’s white Honda was in the driveway of my house, and there was a
red Jeep Wrangler parked on the street out front. Must be Meredith’s, I thought as
I pulled into my garage.
When I walked in through the kitchen, I heard voices in the dining room. I
tossed my car keys on the counter and went in there to find Eric reading to
Meredith.
He was sounding out a word as she waited patiently, leaning her elbows on
the table.
“Won . . . drouse,” Eric said, his brow furrowed with concentration.
“Almost,” Meredith said. “It’s won-drous. But that’s a really hard word, and
you did great.”
“Hey, Dad,” Eric said.
“Hi. How you guys doing?” I leaned a shoulder against the doorframe.
“My homework is all done,” Eric said. “I was just reading a book Meredith
brought.”
“He did fantastic,” Meredith said, standing up. “So did Jordan.”
“Can we keep the cookies?” Eric asked her.
“Sure. Save some for our snack after school tomorrow, though, okay?”
“You’re coming back over?”
“Of course. I want to hear more of that story you’re reading me.”
She grabbed her bag and smiled at Eric. I’d forgotten how tall and lean
Meredith was. She had the lines of a model—long, graceful arms and legs. Her
straight black hair fell just past her shoulders, and her skin was fair. She’d
always been Reed’s girlfriend, fiancée, or ex-fiancée to me, and the last time I’d
seen her, she’d been a patient.
I was seeing her for the first time as just Meredith, and she was pretty. More
than pretty, actually.
“See you guys later,” she said, slinging the bag over her shoulder and
heading for the door.
“I’ll get that for you,” I said, jogging to the front door and opening it for her.
She waved as she walked out, putting on her dark sunglasses.
Stephanie had packed up her books, and she left right behind Meredith.
“Hagrid peed in the kitchen,” Eric said as soon as I closed the door.
“I’m not surprised. Why don’t you guys take him for a walk while I make
dinner?”
“But I want to watch TV.”
I gave him a serious look. “After dinner. And your homework’s all done so
we’ve got the whole evening for fun stuff.”
“Will you swim with us?”
“Yeah.”
I went to the fridge and rummaged through it for ingredients. Looked like I
was grilling burgers again. But the boys liked them, and I did, too.
 As I shaped the meat into patties, I thought about Meredith again. It had been
nice to see a woman in my house for once. There hadn’t been a woman here
other than my mom and sisters-in-law since Kim left.
Not that anything would ever come of my finding Meredith attractive. She
wasn’t someone I could ever date, given that she’d been engaged to my brother.
My mom, who got along with most everyone, still had hard feelings toward
Meredith.
Just the thought of walking into my parents’ house with Meredith made me
chuckle to myself. Reed would shit his pants. It would be beyond awkward for
all of us.
Ah, well. I wasn’t interested in dating anyway. My plate was already full.
I’d made four hamburgers—one for each of the boys and two for myself—
when I grabbed some more ground beef and made a small one for Hagrid, too.
He was one of the boys, after all. I didn’t want him feeling left out.

Gene’s Diner had a full lunchtime crowd. I waved at the co-owner Margie on my
way to meet Mason at the booth he was sitting in.
“Hey,” I said as I slid in.
He shook his head. “Those scrubs could get you so much ass, man.”
I looked down at my green surgical scrubs and then back at him. “Women
aren’t thinking about sex when they see me, dumbass. They’re either sick or
worried about someone who is.”
“Right.” Mason’s eyes widened like the answer was obvious and I was still
missing it. “Someone could turn to you for comfort after seeing their cousin in
the hospital—”
I rolled my eyes with disgust.
“—hear me out, man,” he continued. “For something completely non-life
threatening. Like maybe her cousin had an ingrown toenail removed.”
“Which would definitely not require hospitalization.”
He shrugged. “Maybe the whole toe, then. Anyway, her cousin’s gonna be
fine. And she’s single and eager to sneak off to an empty room with the hot
doctor who saved him.”
“There are so many things wrong with that scenario.”
“But one thing that’s very right.” He nodded knowingly.
“For a guy in a committed relationship, you’re still kind of a douchebag
about women.”
That got a dramatic eye roll from him. “There’s nothing wrong with casual
sex, Kyle. Nothing. As long as both people are single, legal, and they both know
the deal.”
“A woman is the last thing I need. The last one gave me enough grief to last
a lifetime.”
“Kim was a psycho bitch. Find someone normal.”
Margie cleared her throat next to us. “What can I get you boys?”
We ordered burgers and fries, and she rushed off to the next table.
“Let’s not talk about Kim,” I said to Mason.
“Okay, I’m almost done. You shouldn’t have married the first woman you
slept with.”
I arched my brows. “You guys have mentioned that four or five hundred
times already.”
“I’m not saying you should get married again. Not this soon. But you could
use a friend with benefits, you know?”
An image of Meredith flashed before my eyes.
“You’ve got one already,” Mason said, grinning. “I can see it all over your
face. Why didn’t you tell me, you bastard?”
I shook my head. “I don’t. I’m too busy with the boys and work to think
about that stuff much . . . but . . .”
“But?” Mason’s brown eyes, the same shade as mine, were wide and eager.
“I . . . looked at a woman the other day and thought about it a little. I mean,
not about having sex with her, but about how attractive she was. I haven’t looked
at another woman like that since Kim.”
Mason nodded slowly. “Okay, that’s progress. I think you need to get another
look. Who is she?”
I rubbed the stubble on my cheeks and sat back in the booth, smiling
sheepishly. “Uh . . .”
“Fuck, man, you’re killing me. Who is it? Is she married or something?”
“No. It’s just, uh . . . kind of weird.”
His gaze darkened. “It better fucking not be April.”
I glared at him. “You really think I’d look at your girlfriend like that, you
prick?”
“I guess not.”
Margie returned and set down two glasses of iced tea before darting off
again.
“Who is it, Kyle?” Mason said. “I’m your brother, we tell each other
everything. I told you about Cassidy Solomon farting in my face while I was
eating her pussy that one time in high school. You can tell me this.”
I busted out laughing at the memory. “Oh hell, I’d forgotten about that.”
“It wasn’t funny, man.”
“It was awesome.”
“You know what else is awesome?” Mason said in a low tone. “Getting your
dick sucked. And I have, and I do . . . a lot. You know what that’s like? Oh, that’s
right, you don’t, because you’ve only been with a psycho bitch who wouldn’t do
it. I’m trying to help you out here.”
“I don’t need your help. And I don’t want to talk about this here.”
He shook his head. “You’re gonna feel like shit when I tell you why I asked
you to have lunch with me today.”
“I doubt that.”
“I want you to be my best man.”
His words sank in, and I smiled. “You and April are getting married?”
He nodded. “In five weeks.”
“Holy shit, that fast?”
“We’ve been together a year and a half. I always knew we would, but . . . a
few days ago I was having a shitty day at work, and she came into my office and
rubbed my neck and sat on my lap and told me she’d make chicken potpie for
dinner that night. I love her chicken potpie. I just proposed right there, with her
straddling me on my lap.” He smiled. “I knew I could never be with anyone
else.”
“I think that’s great. I’m so happy for you guys.”
“Thanks. I’ve got a pretty amazing girl.”
“She’s close to thirty, bro. May be time to consider her a woman.”
He shook his head, still grinning foolishly. “She’ll still be my girl when she’s
eighty years old.”
“A month, huh?”
“Yep. We’re having the wedding in Mom and Dad’s backyard and then going
to Tahiti for two weeks.”
“Nice.”
“So, on the best man thing?”
“Of course, man. Of course. I’m not throwing you a wild bachelor party,
though. We’ll go on a hunting trip or something.”
Mason’s expression was loaded with disbelief. “It’s like you want to stay
celibate. A bachelor party in Vegas would be prime time to get you laid. I can’t
do anything but look, but you . . .”
“Not my thing, man.”
“Sex isn’t your thing?”
I looked behind me to see who was in the next booth and then glared at
Mason. “Would you keep it down?”
“Tell me who she is.”
I sighed heavily. “Meredith.”
Mason’s mouth dropped open with surprise. “Meredith? Meredith Hobbs?”
“Yeah.”
“Oh, shit.” Mason’s laughter reminded me how off-limits Meredith was.
“Look,” I whispered. “I just said I find her attractive. I’m not doing anything
about it.”
“Might as well. She’s single, right?”
“I don’t know. She’s helping the boys with their homework after school.”
He nodded. “Maybe in an effort to get closer to you?”
“No. It’s just to help the boys.”
“Tell her you need some sex education.”
 Margie was approaching with our food, so we both went quiet.
“You guys need anything else?” she asked as she set down the plates.
“No thanks, we’re good, Margie,” Mason said.
Once she was out of earshot, Mason started back in. “Do you, uh . . . need
some advice on how to close the deal?”
I furrowed my brow with disgust. “You mean Meredith? No, you dumbass.”
He put his hands up in feigned innocence. “It’s been like twenty years since
you’ve hit on a woman, I’m just trying to help.”
“If I wanted to hit on her, I’d figure it out. But I can’t go there. Not with my
brother’s ex-fiancée.”
“Have you asked Reed if he minds?”
“No, because I’m not going there.”
“You need—”
I cut him off. “Let me worry about what I need, okay? Right now, I just need
you to stop blabbering so I can eat my lunch. I have to get back to work.”
He shrugged. “You seem tense. Cranky, even. I feel relaxed and happy. You
know why?”
“Enough,” I said with a serious glare. “I’m sure you got laid this morning,
congratulations.”
“I just want to see you happy.”
“I am happy. I’m fine. Now let’s talk about this hunting trip for your
bachelor party.”
Finally, he conceded. “Maybe some hunting and fly fishing in Montana?”
“Sounds fun. The boys can come. I’ll rent us a lodge for a few days.”
We talked about the trip and the wedding until the end of our lunch. But on
the drive back to my office, I was thinking about Meredith’s wide, pretty smile.
It lit up her whole face. She was a woman with many beautiful features, but her
smile was her best one.
I shouldn’t have been thinking those thoughts about my brother’s former
fiancée. It had probably been a one-time thing, just a fleeting moment of
attraction. And it wasn’t like she felt it back, so there was nothing even to think
about.
 I had patients to focus on, and I needed to decide what to make for dinner
tonight. I forced my thoughts from Meredith to those things.
Meredith
My workday so far had been nothing but numbers. I’d started working on
monthly and quarterly sales reports first thing this morning and had taken a
quick break to eat a sandwich for lunch. Now it was almost three p.m., and my
eyes were feeling the strain from all the hours of staring at a computer screen.
I turned my desk chair so I faced the wall. Unlike the offices of my
coworkers, my wall was empty. Some of the salesmen had posters of cars or
drawings their children had made hanging up and framed family photos on their
desks.
My wall had nothing. It was a metaphor for my life—empty. Helping the
Lockhart boys with their homework for the past week was the most fun I’d had
in a long time. When I left their house every evening, usually to go home to my
empty house, I was even more aware of how alone I was. I was happy for the
opportunity my sister had gotten for a new job in California nearly a year ago,
but I missed her.
A knock sounded on my door, and I turned my chair as someone opened it
and looked in.
“Hey,” a man said, smiling sheepishly.
“Hi. Can I help you?”
“Uh . . .” He opened the door a little wider and stepped in. “Can you tell me
where the bathroom is?”
“Sure, just walk through the showroom, and you’ll see it on the left.”
“Thanks.” He opened his mouth and closed it again, still standing in the
doorway.
After a few seconds of silence, I was about to ask if he needed anything else
when he laughed nervously.
“Actually, uh . . . I don’t need to find the bathroom.”
“Oh.”
 “Yeah, I . . . Can I come in?”
“Sure.”
He walked into my office and looked around, running a hand through his
hair.
“I’m here buying a car. The guys in your detail shop are finishing it up for
me now. When I was talking to a salesman about the car earlier, you walked
across the showroom and I forgot all about the car.” He grinned. “I asked the
salesman about you, and he said you’re single, so . . . would you want to go out
sometime?”
His nervousness flattered me. He was about my height, with curly blond hair
and a receding hairline. He had to be at least ten years older than me, but his
bright blue eyes had a youthful gleam.
“I’m John. Guess I should have said that before.”
“I’m Meredith. Nice to meet you.”
He nodded and held my gaze, his expression hopeful.
“You’re not from Lovely, are you?” I asked.
“No, I’m from Fairbury.”
I wondered if I should tell him I hadn’t been asked out in years. In other
towns, I would have been Meredith Hobbs, single woman, but in Lovely, I was
the Hobbs girl who left Reed Lockhart at the altar.
But then I remembered the wall I’d just been staring at. If I never put myself
out there, that wall would stay empty forever.
“Sure, John. I’ll go out with you.”
“Great. Can I get your number?”
I wrote it down on a piece of paper and gave it to him.
“So . . . I’ll call you then,” he said.
“Okay.”
He left, closing the door behind him. I smiled as I went back to the reports
on my computer screen. John seemed like a nice enough guy. And for the first
time in a while, I felt hopeful. Optimistic, even.
Later that afternoon, Eric Lockhart walked into the dining room with both hands
behind his back. I pretended not to notice since he looked like he had a surprise.
“Meredith,” he said, walking sideways to keep me from seeing behind his
back.
“Yeah?”
“Guess what I got on my spelling test?”
“Hmm . . .” I pretended to consider. “A B-minus?”
He whipped a paper out from behind his back, grinning. “A! I only missed
one!”
“Wow! Great job!”
“My teacher gave me a sticker,” he said proudly.
“All that studying paid off, didn’t it?”
He was already on to something new. “You’re going swimming with us
today, right?”
“When we finish homework, I will.”
“We don’t have homework. Tomorrow’s the last day of school.”
“It is? Already?”
He nodded. “We’re having a picnic tomorrow.”
“That sounds like fun.”
He furrowed his brow, looking concerned. “Will you still come over if we
don’t have homework?”
“Sure, if you want me to.”
“I do. Especially if you bring cookies.”
I couldn’t help laughing at that. “Deal. So let’s tell Jordan we’re going
swimming.”
We found Jordan, and we all changed into our swimsuits. The boys’
babysitter was so engrossed in her phone that she didn’t even notice what we
were doing. I was less than thrilled with Stephanie. She never paid attention to
the boys.
The backyard was an absolute paradise. It had been the talk of Lovely when
Kyle and Kim had put in a large in-ground pool with a small waterfall a few
years ago. There was also a hot tub sunk into the deck, a paved patio with lawn
furniture, and landscaping that looked like it belonged in a home design
magazine.
It was stunning—but not as lavish as the rumor mill had made it out to be.
The guest cottage was beautiful, but it was very small, not the luxury-sized home
I’d heard it was.
“Hey, Meredith,” Jordan said.
I turned toward him and saw a giant water gun pointed right at me. He
wasted no time, hosing me with cold water from head to toe.
Once the water gun was empty, his expression was tentative. I could tell he
was wondering what my reaction would be.
“I think there’s something in my eye,” I said, squinting. “Will you see if
there’s anything there?”
Jordan came close enough to look at my eye, and I wrapped my arms around
him and threw both of us into the pool. When I swam back to the surface, Eric
was laughing hysterically.
We played Marco Polo, had races, and goofed around. I hadn’t laughed so
much in a long time. Homework time was always serious, so it was nice to see
them letting loose and having fun.
I’d lost track of time when Kyle walked through the French doors leading to
the pool, giving us all an amused grin.
“Dad!” Eric cried. “Will you swim with us?”
“Yeah, sure.”
“Even teams for relay races,” Jordan said. “I get Dad.”
The boys came up with a plan for races while I sat on the stairs in the pool’s
shallow end. I was thinking about the reports I’d done at work this afternoon, my
mind wandering, when Kyle walked back outside.
Whoa. He was shirtless, wearing just a pair of longish black swim trunks,
and I couldn’t keep my eyes off him. I’d never thought about what he looked
like beneath his clothes, but he was lean and muscled. He had dark hair on his
chest, which was sexy and a little rugged.
When I finally dragged my gaze from his body to his face, he was smiling.
I’d been busted ogling. My cheeks burned with embarrassment.
 Of all the men to openly admire, I’d just had to choose Kyle Lockhart. A
brother of the man I’d once been engaged to.
But how was a woman who hadn’t had sex in a couple years supposed to
respond to seeing a bare-chested specimen like Kyle? He was hot—that was
undeniable. For the first time, I wasn’t seeing Reed’s brother, my surgeon, or the
father of the boys I did homework with. He was just Kyle, and he liked that I
was looking.
“Do a cannonball, Dad!” Eric cried.
Kyle smiled sheepishly. “I’m sure Meredith doesn’t want to see that.”
“No, I’d love to.”
When he jumped in the air and pulled his knees up to his chest, Kyle created
a mighty splash. He was nearly six and a half feet tall.
The boys clamored to get on his back, and soon Kyle was giving them rides
across the length of the pool, him swimming underwater as they took turns
holding on to his neck.
I liked this side of Kyle. With his sons, he was relaxed and happy and even a
little goofy. It was funny that I’d been so nervous about him being my surgeon
recently. I’d worried he’d still resent me over Reed. But his easy smile put me
completely at ease about that.
We did relay races, which Kyle and Jordan easily won. Then we played
Marco Polo again, and I found out that Kyle was really good at that game. He
cornered me in the pool, and my heart hammered uncontrollably as he got within
a few inches of me.
I could feel the warmth of his body. He was inevitably going to get me, and I
was anticipating where he’d touch me. It ended up being my arm, which was a
bit of a letdown. His fingers lingered there for a few seconds, though.
It had been so long since I’d been with a man that a game of Marco Polo had
become an erotic experience for me. Sad.
Jordan had a baseball game, so we had to get out of the pool for them to get
ready for it. As I stepped out of the water, I felt Kyle looking at me. My red one-
piece swimsuit was old and definitely not sexy, but the serious expression on
Kyle’s face, his eyes dark and interested in what they were seeing, made me feel
sexy.
I took a little longer than necessary to wrap myself in a towel, enjoying his
gaze on me.
“You want to come to my game, Meredith?” Jordan asked.
“I wish I could, but I can’t.”
It was true. I would have loved to go. But I couldn’t be seen as the plus one
to Kyle and the boys in public. The Lovely rumor mill would go into overdrive.
So instead I went home, where I did yoga and made myself a veggie pizza
for dinner. I told myself a Netflix marathon was exactly what I wanted tonight,
but it wasn’t.
I wanted to still be having fun with Kyle and the boys. But that wasn’t an
option. I knew I’d made my bed, but lying in it really sucked sometimes.
Kyle
Playing two-on-two with my brothers got a little intense sometimes. This
afternoon was one of those times. We’d all taken off work early on a Thursday to
play basketball at the Lovely YMCA gymnasium, which was deserted right now.
“Foul!” Austin yelled.
“What, now you’re the ref, too?” Mason said after the ball bounced off the
rim.
“You elbowed me in the face, asshole.”
“You ran into my elbow.”
“Who gives a shit? He didn’t score,” Reed said, walking over to the bench.
“You don’t give a shit because it’s my face,” Austin muttered.
“You were always the ugliest brother anyway,” Mason said, winking at him.
“Better than the one with the smallest dick.”
“You want to fight me?” Mason challenged. “I will fuck you up, number
cruncher.”
Austin laughed and sat down on the bench. “You’re pretty badass yourself,
technology guy.”
“I still fight sometimes.”
“Bring it,” Austin said.
“No one’s fighting, douchebags,” I said. “I’m getting too old to break up that
shit.”
Mason sat down next to Austin. “I think we might get to watch Kyle and
Reed throw down, anyway.”
Reed looked at me, his brows arched with interest. “What’d you do, man?”
“It’s not what he did, it’s what he wants to do,” Mason said, shrugging.
“You’re an asshole,” I said to Mason. “I’m never telling you anything again.”
“What?” Reed asked.
“Nothing.” I wiped the sweat from my face with a towel. “He’s just trying to
make trouble.”
“I’m just trying to help you get laid,” Mason said.
“I don’t need your help.”
“Clearly. Your dick probably shriveled up and disappeared from lack of use
by now.”
“You just want to fight with someone today, don’t you?”
Reed interjected. “What’s he talking about? Just tell me.”
I glared at Mason. “It’s nothing.”
“I’ll tell him if you don’t,” Mason said.
“I’m gonna kick your ass if you don’t shut your smug mouth.”
“You can’t, remember? You have to protect your precious surgeon hands.”
“Fucking tell me,” Reed said.
I sighed heavily and sat down on the bench. “Meredith has been helping the
boys with their homework after school.”
“Yeah?” He gave me a confused look. “And?”
“And I told Mason I find her attractive. That’s it. He’s just trying to make
trouble.”
“Why would I care that you find Meredith attractive?” Reed asked.
Mason jumped in. “How would you feel if he did something about it? Would
it piss you off or not?”
I shook my head. “Mind your own shit, Mason. Seriously.” I looked at Reed.
“I didn’t say I wanted to do anything about it.”
He shrugged. “Why wouldn’t you? I don’t think she’s seeing anyone.”
His nonchalance caught me off guard. “Still . . . it would be awkward. And I
need to stay focused on the boys, anyway.”
“Kim’s been gone for a year, man,” Austin said.
“Yeah, but . . . kids don’t just forget about the stuff that went down with her.
My boys saw their mom drunk, hungover, forgetting to pick them up from
places. And then she left. I can’t imagine how it would feel to a kid for your
mom to just leave like that.”
“Don’t put it on yourself to make up for that,” Reed said. “You’re a great
father.”
 “I try to be.”
“Being a good parent doesn’t mean never doing anything for yourself,
though.”
I rubbed my temple, an image of Meredith’s smile flashing before my eyes.
“Yeah, but Meredith? I’ve had enough of being the talk of the town from all that
shit with Kim.”
Reed shrugged. “Plenty of other women out there.”
“Fuck the gossips,” Mason said. “Don’t be such a pussy.”
I narrowed my eyes at him. “I’m not being a pussy, I’m being a realist. You
think I could just show up at Mom and Dad’s house for dinner with Meredith?”
Reed laughed.
“Of all the women for me to be interested in . . .” I shook my head, and a few
droplets of sweat fell to the gym floor. “She’s pretty much off-limits . . . isn’t
she?”
“If Reed had a problem with it, she would be,” Austin said. “No one else has
any right to bitch.”
“It wouldn’t be weird for you?” I asked Reed.
He shook his head. “I’ve been over Meredith for a long time. I think things
happened the way they were supposed to. Once I met Ivy, I was glad Meredith
didn’t go through with marrying me. And I think people in this town are way too
hard on her over it.”
“Yeah, Mom’s not a Meredith fan,” Austin said.
“Well, the boys like her,” I said. “She’s good with them.”
“She wanted to be a teacher,” Reed said. “But when her dad told her his
finance guy had fucked him over and stolen money from the dealership, she felt
like she needed to work for him.”
I nodded. “Her dad’s her only family besides Lena, isn’t he?”
“Yeah.”
“I’d really rather not get tangled up in anything right now,” I said. “I don’t
have the time or the stomach for it.”
“Not all women are like Kim,” Austin said. “Even before she started
drinking, she was selfish and vain.”
 I’d had enough of talking about this. “Let’s play,” I said, bouncing the ball
I’d been holding against my hip.
“Just ask her out,” Mason said. “What’ve you got to lose?”
“Let’s play,” I repeated.
We resumed our game, and I tried to get Meredith out of my mind. I
couldn’t, though, because I knew she’d be at my house with the boys when I got
home. Just the thought filled me with a nervous excitement I hadn’t felt in a very
long time.

Meredith was sitting in my favorite leather recliner in the living room when I
walked into the house. Eric was on her lap reading to her.
I was taken aback for a couple seconds. Kim had never been much of a
nurturer, and the sight of Meredith smoothing her hand over Eric’s dark hair
brought a lump to my throat.
Was my attraction to her based, at least in part, on watching her be this way
with my kids? Maybe. They were my whole world, and seeing them get the
motherly sort of attention they were so desperate for was a great feeling.
“Hey, guys,” I said.
Meredith took her hand off Eric’s hair. “Oh, hey. We’re just working on
reading.”
“Where’s Jordan?”
“He’s swimming with his friend Nash. He said that was okay with you.”
I nodded. “Yeah, it’s fine. He’s a good swimmer.
“And I told Stephanie she could go home early. I hope that’s okay.”
“Sure, that’s great. Good idea.”
She pushed the button on the side of the chair to fold the bottom back down,
and Eric slid off her lap.
“Are you leaving?” he asked her.
“Yes,” she said, standing up. “Great job with reading today.”
“Will you swim with me?”
She smiled. “I don’t have a swimsuit with me. And I have to go to a softball
game.”
“You play softball?” I asked her.
“No, I just watch with my dad. It’s a men’s league. The dealership has a team
that plays in it.”
She was wearing a green sleeveless dress, and my eyes were drawn down her
long, lean legs to her black, open toed heels. I wanted her to kick those shoes off,
come into the kitchen, and sit on the counter while I made dinner.
Even if we just talked and played with the kids, I didn’t want her to leave.
This was a sign. I needed to ask her out.
“Hey, Eric, will you take Hagrid out?” I asked.
“He’s already outside.”
“Well . . . go check on him, then.”
Eric went out the back door, and Meredith picked up her black bag from the
ground, slinging it over her shoulder.
“See you tomorrow,” she said, walking toward the front door.
“Hey, uh . . . speaking of tomorrow . . . Do you have plans tomorrow night?”
“Um . . .”
I reached a hand behind my neck and grinned sheepishly. “I was just
thinking, you know . . . I could make you dinner. To thank you for all the help
you’ve given the kids. They’ll be at my parents’ house for the night.”
“Oh. I wish I could, but I actually do have plans.”
“Right. Short notice and all. Will your plans run late? We could just do
drinks or something.”
Her cheeks turned pink. “I’m not sure. It’s . . . a date thing.”
“Oh, shit.” I cringed. “I didn’t know you were seeing anyone. Sorry.”
“No,” she said quickly. “I’m not. It’s just this guy who saw me at work, and .
. . anyway. What about next Friday night?”
“Okay.”
“Okay.” She smiled. “See you tomorrow, then.”
“See you then.” I opened the front door, and she walked out.
I watched her walk to her Jeep, taking in her legs once again. She wasn’t just
pretty. There was also something very graceful about her. Some tall women were
lanky, but Meredith had the presence of a runway model. Coupled with her girl-
next-door smile, it was sexy as hell.
“Dad,” Eric said from behind me.
“Hmm?”
“You’re staring at Meredith.”
I turned to him. “Just making sure she gets to her car okay.”
“Why? You never made sure Stephanie got to her car okay.”
“Um . . . how’s Hagrid?”
“Fine.” His brown eyes were solemn as he stared up at me.
“You think we should order pizza for dinner?”
“Yeah. Cheese pizza. Only cheese. And sauce. And crust.”
“Got it.” I ruffled his hair. “So you like Meredith coming over, huh?”
“Yeah. She’s really nice. And she smells good.”
“Oh yeah? What’s she smell like?”
He shrugged. “Just girly. Like powder.”
I couldn’t get jealous of my own kid for being close enough to Meredith to
smell her, but damn, did I want to be that close to her, too.
A date. Just the thought made me a little edgy. Who was this guy? Would he
try to sleep with her tomorrow night?
Of course he would. She was beautiful. Tomorrow night I’d be at home—
probably watching porn again—while some asshole was trying to get between
her legs.
I’d been back in the dating game for all of five minutes, and I was already
jealous.
Meredith
When Kyle got home from work the next day, I was alone in his living room.
“Hey,” I said, my heart pounding nervously just from the sight of him. “The
boys are upstairs packing stuff to stay with your parents tonight.”
“Oh, good idea.” He met my eyes and smiled.
God, he looked good in those surgical scrubs. I was trying not to get my
hopes up about him, because maybe he’d meant it about making me dinner to
thank me for helping the boys. Maybe that was all it was. If I’d read his vibes
wrong yesterday, I’d end up mortified and bummed.
“So I was thinking . . .” I said, clearing my throat, “that maybe I should give
you my number. You know, in case you need to reach me about the kids.”
“Sure.” He took out his phone and entered my number as I gave it to him.
Then he gave me his, and I put it into my phone.
“They wanted to go out for ice cream today, but I didn’t think I should take
them anywhere without asking you first.”
“I trust you. Just text me and let me know if you guys are going somewhere.”
I nodded. “Okay. Tell them I said I’ll see them Monday, okay?”
I grabbed my bag, clutching the handle tightly.
“So, uh . . . have a good time tonight . . . I guess,” he said with a half-smile.
“Thanks. And you have a good weekend.”
“Will do.”
We walked to the front door, and he opened it for me. I walked out to my
Jeep, unable to keep myself from turning around to see if he was still looking at
me.
He was. I smiled as I slid on my sunglasses and pulled my hair back. The top
of my Jeep was off, and I couldn’t see if my hair was in my face while I drove.
John. I told myself to focus on John, whom I was going out with tonight.
I’d gone from not having a date in well over a year to having two in one
week.
Well, one for sure. And another thing that wasn’t necessarily a date, but . . .
God, I wanted it to be. I had the hots for Reed’s older brother. As much as I
knew I shouldn’t, I officially did.
When I walked into my small bungalow, the lemony scent of cleaning
products told me Patricia had been here. She was my dad’s neighbor who had
lost her job last year. He’d seen her crying on her front porch and went to see
what was going on. When she told him she’d been laid off and had no savings,
he’d hired her on the spot to clean the dealership, his house, and my house every
week.
It was nice coming home to a clean house every Thursday. And every time I
smelled that lemony scent, it reminded me how big-hearted my father was. He
always took up for those in need. It was how he’d ended up with his dog, Racer.
Racer had been abused and was considered unadoptable by the local animal
shelter. My father refused to let him be euthanized. He and Racer were now the
best of friends.
John hadn’t said where we were going tonight, so I changed into jeans and a
T-shirt. Hopefully, he had something casual in mind.
He pulled into my driveway right on time in a red pickup truck. I grabbed
my bag and met him at my door.
“Hey, looking good,” he said, grinning.
“Oh, thanks.”
“Quick selfie before we go?” he asked, holding up his phone.
“Um . . . sure.”
He wrapped his arm around my waist and held his phone in the air, putting
his cheek against mine for the picture.
I smiled, but inside I was scowling. Clearly, John didn’t understand personal
boundaries.
“Just gonna post this to Facebook real quick,” he said, typing something out
on his phone.
Thank God I wasn’t on Facebook. I never wanted to see that photo.
“So, ready for some great Chinese food?” he asked, grinning as he slid his
phone back into his pocket.
“I love Chinese,” I said, walking beside him to his truck.
He opened the door for me, and I got in. I decided to put the rocky beginning
of the date behind us and give him another shot.
“So what do you do for a living?” I asked him as he backed out of my
driveway.
“I’m an insurance underwriter.”
“Oh, that sounds interesting.”
He shrugged. “It’s okay. But if I’d never gone into this line of work, I never
would have met that evil bitch, Laura.”
What the hell did one say to that? “Oh.”
His laugh was humorless. “Yeah, she’s a doozy. You got any crazy exes?”
“Me? No, not—”
“You’re lucky. Laura stole two thousand bucks from me. And she posted a
dick pic online and said it was mine, but it wasn’t. Pinkie-sized.”
“Oh, that’s . . . unfortunate.”
I stared out the windshield, willing myself to throw up right now so I could
end this date. I didn’t know how I could spend an entire evening with this guy.
“Laura lives in Lovely, too,” he said. “So we’ll just cruise by her house real
quick before we grab dinner.”
I couldn’t even think of anything to say as John circled Laura’s block three
times, slowing in front of her house to try to see through the windows.
My creeper alarm was obviously broken. I couldn’t believe I’d given him my
phone number and address. He even knew where I worked.
“Hey, John, can you stop the truck?”
He pulled over to the side of the road. “What’s up, gorgeous?”
I opened the door and stepped out of the truck. “Look, you’re obviously still
not over Laura. This isn’t going to work out.”
He furrowed his brow in confusion. “I’m totally over that bitch. What are
you talking about?”
“Don’t call me again.”
I closed the truck door and got on the sidewalk, where I headed in the
direction of Marty’s house. He was a salesman from work who only lived a
block away.
John squealed his tires as he pulled out, and I rolled my eyes. What a lunatic.
When I got to Marty’s house and told his wife Cara why I was there, she
hugged me and invited me in for a glass of wine.
“Honey, that may be the worst first-date story I’ve ever heard,” she said.
“You need at least two glasses of wine after that.”
I laughed and let her refill my glass. She told me some of her own dating
horror stories, and I laughed some more. Marty was watching a baseball game in
the basement, and I didn’t even see him until he came upstairs to make a
sandwich an hour after I’d arrived. Cara caught him up on what had happened,
and I knew the whole dealership would know by ten a.m. on Monday. But they
were a good group of people who would also laugh about it with me.
“I should probably get going,” I said to Cara. “Can one of you guys give me
a ride home?”
“I’ve had a little too much wine,” she said to Marty.
“Sure thing, I’ll take you,” he said.
“Cara, thank you so much. You made my awful night a whole lot better.”
She hugged me. “I’m glad you came over.”
“Maybe we could do wine at my place sometime.”
“Anytime.” Her eyes lit up. “Oh, I’m having a jewelry party next weekend.
You should come. It’s next Sunday afternoon.”
“Sounds like fun. I’d love to.”
“Great. Two o’clock.”
I said good-bye to her, and Marty drove me home, which was only about five
minutes away by car.
“If that crazy bastard shows up at your house, you give me a call,” he said as
he pulled into my driveway. “I’ll be over here in a jiffy.”
“Thanks, Marty.”
“You lock your doors tonight, you hear?”
“I will.”
I always locked my doors anyway, but tonight I double-checked them. Then I
cooked a frozen pizza, ate half of it, took a hot bath, and got in bed with a book.
I read until a little after eight, but then I put the book down beside me on the
bed, my mind wandering to Kyle.
What was he doing right now? Was he alone? Was he shirtless?
I pictured him in his swimming trunks and smiled. Kyle was different from
his brothers. He didn’t have their swagger. I liked that about him.
On impulse, I picked up my phone from the nightstand and texted him.
Me: The date was a total bust.
I bit my lip, nervously awaiting his reply. It came soon.

Kyle: Should I pretend I’m disappointed?

I grinned so hard a squeal came out. It had been ages since I’d been flirted
with, and it felt incredible. Especially since it was Kyle Lockhart on the other
end of this text exchange.
Me: No need. Hope I’m not interrupting anything.
Kyle: Not at all. I’m just watching baseball.
Me: Hope your team wins. See you Monday.

Kyle: I don’t get to hear about the date?

Me: It was about fifteen minutes long, if that says anything.
Kyle: No shit?
Me: No shit.
Kyle: Damn. I promise a better Friday night next weekend.
Me: Counting on it. Goodnight.
Kyle: Goodnight.
I read for another hour, the giddy sensation still with me when I switched off
the light beside my bed. The night had ended better than I’d expected.
The next morning, I went running, did an hour of yoga, got groceries, and took a
shower. After a quick lunch, I decided to stop by the Lovely Hospital League
fundraiser. It was a biannual event with handbags, scarves, candles, and baked
goods.
My mother had always baked for the fundraiser, and I’d loved going with
her. I’d felt proud when her brownies sold out, which happened no matter how
many she made.
I thought of her every time I used her brownie recipe. It had been painful the
first few years after we lost her, but I was finally getting to a point where I liked
doing things that reminded me of her.
When I parked in the hospital parking lot, I stayed in my Jeep for a few extra
seconds, giving myself a mental pep talk.
Yes, I was alone and had no one to talk to at this thing. But it was fine. I
could shop by myself. It had been nearly a decade since I ended things with
Reed Lockhart. That was a long time, and I needed to stop making myself an
outcast. Cara’s invitation to her future jewelry party the night before had given
me the confidence to come here, and maybe something good would come of this,
too.
I grabbed my bag and walked inside, nodding and smiling at the people I
recognized as I walked by them.
I picked out a new bag and got in line to pay for it. I couldn’t see past the
people in front of me, and when I got to the front of the line, Grace Lockhart sat
behind the cash register.
I wanted to run, but my feet wouldn’t move.
“Meredith,” she said in a cool tone.
The women working behind the other cash registers turned to look at us. My
face heated with embarrassment.
“I need the bag so I can scan it,” Grace said.
I thrust it out to her, willing my eyes not to fill with tears. Turning bright red
was bad enough—I was not going to cry.
 She refused to make eye contact with me, telling me the cost of the bag in a
no-nonsense tone. I passed over the money, dropping the coins to the table.
“Sorry,” I said softly, picking them up.
She put the bag and my receipt into a plastic shopping bag and handed it to
me, not saying a word. I took it and bolted for the parking lot.
I’d donate the bag to charity. Otherwise, I’d remember the shame I felt right
now every time I looked at it.
I didn’t belong here. No matter what I did or how much time passed, people
would always see me for what had happened with Reed.
Getting the cold shoulder from Grace burned more this time because I
wanted her to like me. She was Kyle’s mother and Jordan and Eric’s
grandmother. They mattered to me, and I wanted to think Grace might be willing
to give me another chance.
It didn’t look likely, though. I wondered if she was upset because she’d heard
I was going over to help the boys or because of Reed.
Either way, she didn’t like me, and I was pretty sure she never would.
Kyle
The next week, there was a new energy between Meredith and me. Just making
eye contact with her when I came home from work got my blood pumping.
Sometimes her smiles felt different—secret somehow, and meant just for me.
If eye contact and her smile made my dick stiffen with awareness, I could
only imagine what being alone with her would do to me. I’d probably have an
erection over dinner. I was thirty-seven years old, but I felt like a teenager again,
all raging hormones, desperate for even a touch from her.
I kept my phone on my nightstand every night, hoping she’d text me from
her bed. Not that she had a reason to.
When I got home Thursday, Jordan asked Meredith to come to his baseball
game that night. She told him she had plans, but from the way she looked away
before answering, I sensed she didn’t. She probably just knew rumors would
start flying if she showed up anywhere near the Lockhart family.
“Maybe next time,” Jordan said.
“I’d like that,” she said. “You play first base, right?”
“Yeah. Sometimes third.”
“Well, good luck tonight.”
I walked her to the front door as usual, and she turned to me right before
walking outside.
“Are we still on for tomorrow?” she asked softly.
“I hope so.”
She smiled. “Okay. What should I bring?”
“Just you. When I get home, I’ll run the boys over to my parents’ house.”
“I’ll probably run home and change when you get home. I mean . . . you
probably don’t want the boys to know about . . . not that we’re . . .”
Her cheeks had turned bright pink, and it was really damn cute. I grinned and
leaned against the doorframe, hoping she’d continue.
 “Anyway . . .” She took a deep breath. “I’ll just bring some wine.”
“And a swimsuit.”
She arched her brows with surprise.
“In case we want to swim,” I said.
“Oh, right.”
“Do you, uh . . . have any two-pieces? Not that the other swimsuit wasn’t
nice, you know, but . . .”
“I’ll see what I can do.”
“We’re practically whispering here,” I said.
“I know. I feel like a naughty kid or something.”
“Naughty, huh?”
Her blush deepened. “I’ll see you tomorrow, Kyle.”
“Looking forward to it.”
As Eric and I sat in the stands at Jordan’s baseball game that evening, I felt a
twinge of guilt. My mother made no secret of her feelings about Meredith. And
while my kids were having dinner at my parents’ place tomorrow, I’d be making
dinner for Meredith.
When I left the bleachers to get Eric some popcorn, my mother followed me,
pulling me off to the side where no one could hear our conversation.
“I’ve been hearing Meredith Hobbs’s Jeep has been seen at your house quite
regularly lately,” she said, crossing her arms over her chest. “What’s going on?”
“She’s been helping the boys with homework after school.”
“It’s summer.”
I shrugged. “Extra help. They both need it. Their grades slipped after Kim
left.”
She narrowed her eyes slightly. “But why Meredith?”
“Why not? She offered. The boys like her.”
My mother’s laugh did not sound amused. “I bet she offered. She regrets
what happened with Reed, and now she’s moving in on you.”
I shook my head. “She’s not moving in, Mom. Relax.”
“You’re probably the most eligible man in all of Lovely, Kyle. A handsome
doctor with a beautiful home. I know how women like Meredith work.”
 “She’s not working anything.”
“She’s going on thirty now, and no man will give her a second glance after
what she did to your brother. She’s an opportunist looking to secure her future.”
“Mom,” I said firmly. “Stop. I mean it. The boys like her, and I don’t want
you talking about her this way.”
“That’s all this is, then? Just tutoring for the boys?”
“Yeah.”
It was sort of true. Nothing else had happened . . . yet, and my mom was
overstepping her boundaries. I wasn’t about to tell her I was attracted to
Meredith—that was none of her business.
“I just want what’s best for you and my grandsons,” she said softly.
“Let me worry about that, Mom.”
She nodded. “I know Meredith is a pretty girl, Kyle, but she’s bad news.”
“I think she’s a nice person who made a mistake. I’ve been there myself.”
“A mistake?” She stared at me in disbelief. “She humiliated your brother in
front of this whole town.”
“He’s over it, Mom. It was a long time ago. Now, I’m going to get some
popcorn. You want some?”
“No, thanks.” She hesitated before continuing. “You know, it may be time
for you to consider dating again.”
I sighed, but I stopped short of glaring at her. She meant well.
“I’ll decide when it’s time. And then I’ll decide who. I’m not dating your
hospital foundation friends’ daughters just because they’re single.”
She pursed her lips. “Well, maybe you should at least give one of my
suggestions a try.”
So she had someone in mind. I wasn’t surprised. My mom was great overall,
but sometimes she tried too hard to get things happening her way—the best way,
in her not so humble opinion.
“I’m going to get some popcorn for Eric, and then I’m watching Jordan’s
game,” I said.
“Sure, we can talk about this later.”
“Or not,” I said firmly. “Because I think the conversation is over.”
 Her quick nod told me it wasn’t over as far as she was concerned. I had to
give her a little slack because she’d struggled while watching the Kim disaster
unfold. Kim’s drinking had escalated, and I’d buried my head in the sand over it
for a few months. I deeply regretted that now. I sometimes wondered what would
have happened if Kim hadn’t left me. Would I still be with her?
I’d never considered leaving her. Marriage was a lifelong commitment to me.
But the boys and I were definitely in a better place with her gone.
I wasn’t about to upset that balance by getting into a serious relationship. I’d
spend time with Meredith, but I wasn’t looking for more than that. It was
probably best to be up front with her about that.
Hopefully, she wouldn’t be offended. I rubbed my forehead, considering the
best way to tell her as I walked to the ballpark concession stand.
Dealing with women was not my strong suit. They were the opposite of my
work, which was all about precision and order. I just hoped I wouldn’t run
Meredith off before I’d even gotten a chance with her.

The next evening, I’d dropped the boys off at my parents’ place, expertly
ducking out before my mom could ask me why I wasn’t staying for dinner, and I
was getting things ready for Meredith’s arrival.
I had steaks marinating and sweet potatoes wrapped in foil, both ready for
the grill. I wore basketball shorts and a T-shirt because it was in the high eighties
outside. Despite the shorts, I was still sweating. Had to be nerves. I was so
fucking out of practice with this kind of thing.
I was halfway through a Corona when she knocked on the door. When I
opened it, she smiled, and I could see she was nervous, too.
“Hey,” I said, stepping aside so she could come in.
“Hi. I brought red.” She pulled a bottle of wine from the large bag on her
shoulder. “Is that okay?”
“It’s great.”
I finally felt like I could look her over slowly, savoring every inch of her,
knowing I wouldn’t get busted by my sons. She wore a black strapless dress that
showed off her legs, her turquoise swimsuit strings tied around her neck. Her
dark hair was pulled up in a bun, showcasing the creamy, perfect skin on her
neck.
“You look nice,” I said.
Her smile was the wide, pretty one I fantasized about. “You’re sweet. It’s a
swimsuit cover-up.”
“Ah.” I grinned sheepishly. “I don’t know about these things. Looks like a
dress to me.”
She followed me into the kitchen, where she set her bag down on the floor.
“I turned the hot tub on, in case you’re up for that later,” I said, moving our
steaks from the container I’d marinated them in onto a plate.
“I’d love that. I haven’t been in a hot tub in years.” She set the wine on the
counter. “How can I help with dinner?”
“I’m just gonna grill it. I’ll pour some wine, and we can sit outside while it
cooks if you want. Or I have Corona with limes if you want that.”
“Fancy,” she teased. “I’d love one.”
I opened a bottle of beer for her and stuck a slice of lime inside. “I can’t
drink a Corona without a lime in it. Not that I drink much.”
“Not your thing?”
I shrugged. “I used to have a beer with dinner now and then, especially after
a long day. But the boys don’t like having alcohol in the house after Kim. They
worry I’ll become an alcoholic, too. So I never drink around them.”
Meredith’s expression fell. “That’s really sad.”
I didn’t want to talk about my ex-wife anymore, so I moved on. “Means
we’ve got six Coronas and a bottle of wine to finish tonight. You may need to
stay over.”
She blushed and smiled. My cock twitched in my shorts, and I moved to
stand behind the island so I didn’t look like an overeager pubescent.
Once I’d tamed the beast by thinking about the steak and potatoes, I took the
food outside and Meredith followed.
“It’s quiet without the boys here,” she said, sitting down on a bench by the
grill.
 “Yeah, it is.” I turned on the grill and looked at her. “So how was your Friday
at work?”
“Pretty good.”
“What do you do at the dealership?”
She waved a hand. “Just boring stuff. Payroll and benefits administration and
accounting.”
“You like it?”
“I don’t mind it. I like the people I work with, and I like knowing my dad’s
business is in good hands.”
“He’s lucky to have you.”
“That’s nice of you to say.”
She crossed her legs, revealing more skin, though she didn’t seem to know
she’d done it. As I tried not to stare, she was obliviously sipping her drink.
“How about you?” she said. “Did you have a good day at work?”
“Yeah, the usual. I did an appendectomy and a gall bladder removal this
morning. Had office hours in the afternoon.”
“What made you decide to become a doctor?”
I smiled. “You remember Dr. Porter?”
“I do.”
“I had to go see him when I was a kid because I had pretty bad leg pains. He
sent me to a specialist in St. Louis, and it turned out I was just growing really
fast, and that was the source of the pain. But that trip to the children’s hospital
made me realize I wanted to be a doctor. I thought it was the coolest place in the
world.”
“I like that.”
“I never really planned on becoming a surgeon, but Lovely Hospital
recruited me when I was in med school. They needed a general surgeon and were
set on a hometown boy settling in here long-term.”
The steaks sizzled as I put them on the grill. Meredith stood up and looked
out over the pool.
“Well, you do have a great bedside manner,” she said.
“Thank you,” I said, trying to keep from smirking.
 “What? That’s funny?”
I shook my head. Now I was the one blushing. I couldn’t tell her I didn’t
want to be beside any bed she was also near.
“You hungry?” I asked her.
“Starving. I ate a handful of pistachios for lunch.”
“What kind of a lunch is that?”
She shrugged. “I was in the middle of something I needed to finish up.”
“Well, I’ve got pie from Gene’s in the fridge for dessert.”
“This is nice,” she said softly.
“The food?”
“No. I mean, yeah . . . I’m sure it will be. But I meant the company.”
“I agree.”
It was all I could do to keep my eyes off her and focus on the food I was
cooking. I’d precooked the potatoes in the microwave, so within a few minutes,
we were sitting down at the kitchen table with our food and two glasses of the
red wine she’d brought.
“This is so good,” she said after her first bite of steak.
“Thanks. I grill about half the time. I’ve gotten pretty decent at it.”
“I think it’s amazing what you do. Balancing work and the boys and the
house.”
“I wasn’t balancing it all until I cut back on work last year. I worked way too
much when my kids were little.”
She arched a brow and grinned. “You mean you’re not perfect? You’re in
good company.”
I wiped my mouth and set my napkin down. “Just tell me if I’m
overstepping, but why’d you back out on marrying my brother?”
“You put it more kindly than most people do,” she said, looking down at the
table. “I was young and stupid. The closer I got to the wedding day, the more
unsettled I felt. My mom had died six months before the wedding was set, and I
told myself that was why everything felt off. I never even told Reed how I felt,
which is terrible.” She looked up and met my eyes. “My mom always used to
say it’s never too late. And that day, as I put on the dress and looked at myself in
the mirror, I just kept thinking about that over and over. The closer we’d gotten
to the wedding, the more I’d told myself it was too late not to go through with it.
But I felt like my mom was telling me it wasn’t too late. That marrying him
when I wasn’t sure would be a much bigger mistake than not doing it.”
I nodded. “I agree with you there.”
“I loved Reed. But marrying him just wasn’t . . . right. I hate the way I
handled it, though.”
“I think his ego recovered just fine. Don’t sweat it anymore. Not after all this
time.”
Her eyes glistened. I realized in that moment that my mom couldn’t have
been more wrong about Meredith.
“So . . .” She cleared her throat and tucked her hair behind her ear. “I heard
Mason’s engaged. That’s great.”
“Yeah, he and April are a really good fit.”
I told her about the hunting trip I was planning as a bachelor party, which led
to talk of my love for hunting and fishing. Turned out her dad was a fisherman,
too.
“You think we can finish this off?” I asked, picking up the bottle of wine.
“Oh, I don’t think that’ll be a problem.”
I poured the last of it into our glasses, and we cleared the dishes from the
table together.
“You feel like a swim?” I asked her.
“Sure. No relay racing this time, right?”
I laughed at the thought and told her I was going to change into my swim
trunks.
When I got out to the pool, Meredith was sitting on the stairs at the shallow
end of the pool. I held my breath as I watched her swirling an ankle around in
the water. She was so damn pretty, her bikini top allowing me a full view of her
long, lean lines. She had such a natural beauty—not a single nip or tuck on her.
And I had a feeling she wasn’t the type to have work done as she aged, which I
liked.
I sat down next to her on the stairs, adjusting to the cool pool water. She
smiled at me.
“I’m supposed to make an appointment with you for a follow-up on the
incision on my breast,” she said.
“Oh, yeah, I forgot about that. I can look at it now if you want to save a trip
to my office. I mean, if that doesn’t make you uncomfortable.”
She shrugged. “Not at all. You’ve seen me already.”
“Yeah, but . . . I didn’t, really. I don’t think about my patients that way. In my
head, it’s totally clinical.”
“You’ve never been turned on by seeing a naked patient?”
I cringed. “Never. No.”
She slid the left cup of her bikini top to the side, revealing the tiny pink
incision from her biopsy. I cocked my head to get a good look at it.
“It’s healing fine,” I said. “I don’t think you’ll have much of a scar there.”
“It doesn’t matter. No one but me would see it if I did,” she said, looking
down at the pool water.
Instinct made me reach over and brush aside the hair that was hanging down
to conceal her face from my view. She turned her face toward me, and I leaned
in, my lips meeting hers in a kiss that was slow and gentle.
As soon as she parted her lips, I cupped her cheek and kissed her deeper,
savoring the taste of the wine on her mouth.
It was like the sweet, slightly exotic scent of her perfume and the smooth,
soft feel of her skin were meant for me. I couldn’t get enough.
She slid closer to me and wrapped a hand around the back of my neck. Our
tongues met in a dance that was only slightly familiar. I’d only kissed one other
woman in my life, and this new territory turned me on hard.
When she pulled away, she was breathless. Her lips were red from the scrape
of my stubble against them. As soon as she gave me that wide, gorgeous smile, I
wanted to go back in for another kiss.
“I like you,” she said, her tone so soft it was almost a whisper.
“I like you, too. I could just sit here and kiss you all night.”
“I wouldn’t mind that at all.” She picked up her wineglass from the edge of
the pool and took a sip.
 “Are you blushing or is it the wine?” I asked.
“Probably both.”
I stepped down into the pool and went underwater, wiping the water from my
face when I came back up. When I approached Meredith and put my hands
around her waist, her eyes widened a little.
She hadn’t been touched in a while. We were two souls with more common
ground than I’d ever realized. Both of us were starved for a moment like this.
When I eased her off the stairs and into the water, she smiled and wrapped
her arms around my neck. I kissed her again, the water lapping gently at our
chests.
We both got less tentative, exploring each other with our hands and lips. She
ran her hands through my wet hair and over my scruffy, unshaven cheeks. I
traced a finger up the ridges of her spine and cupped her ass as she wrapped her
legs around my waist.
After about twenty minutes of kissing and touching without words, I eased
my face back from hers and met her eyes.
“You want some music?” I asked her.
“Sure.”
I let go of her and swam toward the stairs, looking at her over my shoulder.
“Need anything else? Another drink?”
“I’ll take another Corona.”
I smiled sheepishly. “You might not want to watch me get out of the pool. I
can’t hide this wood.”
She laughed. “Oh, I’m watching. It’ll flatter me.”
I stepped out of the pool, and sure enough, my erection jutted straight out in
front of me like it was drawn to an invisible magnet.
I wasn’t a player by any stretch. Though I was a good-looking guy, marrying
my high school girlfriend had limited my experience with women. But I didn’t
feel weird about that with Meredith. To the contrary, I wanted her to know that
every kiss and every touch meant something to me.
How could I put that into words without sounding lame as fuck?
I grabbed two more beers from inside, then opened the garage door and
reached around to the wall to switch on the pool lights and the sound system.
Soft music filled the air, and I knew I couldn’t put anything into words right
now. I just wanted to feel Meredith’s skin against mine.
Meredith
I was alone in the pool, my heart pounding with excitement and anticipation. I
wondered if Kyle had heard me sighing as he touched me. I’d been unable to
help it. There was no way I could tell him why his hand cupping my cheek had
brought tears to my eyes that I forced away. It was because it had been years
since I’d felt a man’s tender touch.
Truthfully, no man since Reed had taken his time with me. I’d had fast,
decent sex with two men since him. One of them had been the man I’d had a
disastrous month-long marriage with after leaving Reed. The other had been
Tyler, a guy I knew from high school whom I’d gotten with in a moment of
desperation more than two years ago. He’d jackhammered me for ten minutes,
pouring buckets of sweat with the exertion of getting me off. Then he’d gotten
dressed and said “Thanks for the lay” before leaving.
But hey, beggars couldn’t be choosers. Or so I’d thought before getting with
Tyler. But I’d felt so much shame after that encounter that I’d decided no sex
was better than meaningless sex.
Somewhere between the end of things with Reed and hooking up with Tyler,
I’d come to feel like I didn’t deserve to be cherished. But that had all changed
when Tyler left my house after our mediocre sexual encounter.
Maybe no man would ever cherish me again, I’d decided the next morning.
But it wouldn’t be because I didn’t deserve it. And I wouldn’t settle for less.
The long drought had made me extra sensitive to a man’s touch, though. I’d
broken out in goose bumps when Kyle kissed me, and I’d jumped a little when
he squeezed my ass. I’d closed my legs around him a little tighter, trying to let
him know I was just jumpy and that he should not, under any circumstances,
stop.
When he turned on the pool lights and music, butterflies fluttered wildly in
my stomach. He’d only been gone for a minute, and I couldn’t wait for him to
get back. Already I missed the feel of his warm, powerful body against mine.
He walked over to the edge of the pool with two bottled Coronas in hand.
“Hot tub?” he asked, arching his brows.
“Sure.”
I walked up the pool steps, loving the feel of his gaze on me. He stood beside
the sunken hot tub and waited, offering me his hand for support as I stepped in.
The steaming, swirling water felt amazing. I sighed as I relaxed into it.
When I sat down, he set my Corona on the deck next to my arm and then
stepped in himself. He sat across from me, stretching his arms out to his sides on
the deck. His arms spanned the entire length of the large hot tub, the definition of
his muscles making my eyes linger.
“Feels good,” he said, leaning his head back on the deck.
“I never thanked you for dinner,” I said. “So, thank you. It was delicious.”
“My pleasure. It was nice to cook for someone whose meat I didn’t have to
cut up.”
He grinned and sank down farther into the water. When his hands touched
the calf of one of my legs, I felt a jolt of excitement. He slid them down until my
foot was in his hands.
“You like foot rubs?” he asked.
“I’ve never had one.”
He started massaging a thumb into the bottom of my foot, and I moaned
softly.
“Yes, I love foot rubs,” I said.
The water bubbled around us as he massaged both my feet. I sank down into
the water until the tips of my hair were submerged, then sat back up, keeping my
feet in Kyle’s lap.
“Tell me one of your secrets,” he said softly. “Something no one knows
about you.”
I felt a brief twinge of worry, because I didn’t share secrets with anyone. All
my private thoughts were safely locked inside me. But there was something very
tempting about opening up to Kyle this way. The hunger in his dark gaze was
unmistakable.
 “I’ll go first,” he said.
He opened his mouth to start, but he closed it again. “This is harder than I
thought it would be.”
“I swear it’s safe with me, whatever it is.”
“I know. It’s just . . .” He cleared his throat. “It’s something you probably
wouldn’t guess about me.”
“Just go for it,” I said, easing my foot from his hand into his lap.
I ran my toes over his long, hard erection. He groaned and closed his eyes for
a second.
“I’ve never had a blow job,” he said, opening his eyes as soon as the words
were out.
I went still. “Never ever?”
He shook his head, his expression sheepish.
“Not even with Kim?”
“She said she was disgusted by it. Never even tried it.”
“Oh, wow.”
“Yeah.”
The vulnerability in his expression made me want to pull off his swim trunks
and suck his dick here and now. I wanted him badly, but I also wanted to take
away the part of him that obviously felt like less of a man over his secret.
Kyle Lockhart was one of the hottest men I’d ever laid eyes on. There was
something so earthy and real about his big brown eyes and easy smile. And who
could deny that six feet, five inches of lean, muscled man who was very well
endowed was sexy?
He was right—I never would have guessed that about him.
“Whoever gets to be your first is the luckiest woman alive,” I said.
He smiled, and the corners of his eyes crinkled. “I don’t know about that.
I’m sure it’s a chore for all women.”
“No, it’s not.”
“You don’t hate it?”
“No. I mean, not that I do it all the time or anything. I haven’t been with very
many men.”
 “How many?”
“Three.”
I felt like the couple seconds of silence between us were devoted to the fact
that one of those men was his brother.
“With the right man, I love it,” I said. “It’s very sexy to be on your knees in
front of a man and know it’s really him on his knees.”
Kyle’s erection was like steel beneath my toes. He exhaled softly as I
caressed him. I felt dizzy with the rush of making him feel this way.
“Thank you for telling me that,” I said softly. “It means a lot that you trusted
me enough.”
His lips parted and he groaned. “That feels fucking amazing.”
“I could just keep doing this instead of telling you my secret,” I said
playfully.
“How about both?”
“Mmm . . . okay.”
I took a deep breath and decided to dive right in. “I have three vibrators.”
He arched his brows, a light of interest dancing in his eyes.
“Three?”
“Yes. And I use them very regularly. Probably five or six nights a week.”
“Wow.”
“And . . .” I felt my cheeks warming with a blush. “I named them.”
His deep notes of laughter made desire for him swirl in my belly. “Well, let’s
have it. What are they?”
I covered my eyes with my hand, then took it away. “Hickory, Dickory, and
Dock.”
“Oh, hell.” He laughed and returned his hand to my foot, rubbing it against
his erection.
“And obviously, my favorite is Dickory.”
That made him throw his head back and laugh hard. “Obviously.”
I felt warm and a little lighter after sharing something so intimate with him.
He’d stopped laughing now, his expression serious as he pressed his big,
powerful fingers into my insole to massage it.
 “Meredith, it’s a crime that a woman as spectacular as you would ever have
to use a vibrator.”
I shrugged. “It’s not my first choice, but I don’t have casual sex.”
He smiled. “Me either . . . obviously. I’ve only been with one woman.”
My breath left me in a whoosh I hoped he didn’t hear. Only Kim. This
glorious, warm, sexy man had married his high school girlfriend and stuck by
her as she spiraled out of control. It was common knowledge she’d screwed the
contractor who built the addition on their house that she’d insisted on. And still,
Kyle had stayed true. She’d walked out on him and their boys, and he’d picked
up the pieces.
I officially had a huge crush on this man.
He eased my feet out of his lap and sat forward, putting his palms on either
side of me on the seat of the hot tub. As he leaned closer, I wrapped a hand
around the back of his neck.
This time, his kiss was less tentative. He brushed his tongue against mine,
and I moaned into his mouth softly.
I was hot and achy all over, my body reveling in the closeness of him. When
he pulled back, I missed his mouth on mine immediately.
He wrapped his hands around my waist and eased himself back onto the hot
tub seat he’d been sitting on before, taking me with him and putting me on his
lap so I straddled him.
“Perfect,” he said, running his fingertips down my spine.
Water dripped from the ends of his dark hair. I ran my fingers through it and
tugged gently as I crushed my mouth against his.
His hold on my waist tightened, and he groaned. He matched my hunger for
him, kissing me hard.
I wanted to drink in everything about this moment—burn every sensation
into my memory. It was a once in a lifetime feeling of complete bliss and
contentment.
He moved his lips down my neck, taking his time to kiss every inch of my
skin. The scrape of his stubble over my skin made me break out in goose bumps
yet again.
 “I love that,” I whispered in his ear, nipping at his earlobe. “The way you
kiss my neck.”
His tongue traced across a tiny ridge of my collarbone, and he pulled my hips
tight against his, his erection grinding into me.
“You feel so good,” he said against my neck.
He ran his fingertips back up my spine, and then I felt him tugging at the tie
of my bikini top at my neck. Slowly, he loosened it until the straps fell down my
back.
“Am I moving too fast?” he whispered in my ear.
“No,” I whispered back. I sat up straight in his lap and let my bikini top fall
down to my stomach.
His eyes widened as he took in my breasts. He hadn’t been kidding about not
paying attention to them that day in his office—it was like he was seeing them
for the first time.
After a few seconds of just staring, his eyes flickered to mine and then back
down to my breasts. I loved his boyish uncertainty.
Reaching behind me, I took his hands from my hips and guided them to my
breasts.
Kyle needed no further encouragement. He cupped them and pinched my
nipples gently between his thumb and forefinger.
I let my head fall back so I could just soak in the sensations. Soon his warm
breath on my nipple made me moan with desire.
He was deliciously slow and deliberate, tracing the tip of his tongue over my
nipples until they were hard, then swirling his tongue around them again in
circles.
I held on to his biceps, grinding my hips against his.
“Fuck,” he said with a groan. “You feel so good.”
I leaned forward and kissed him, my breasts pressing against his bare chest.
He wrapped his arms around my back and kissed me with a fervor that felt like
possessiveness.
We stroked and tasted and explored each other until pitch-black darkness had
fallen. I was on the edge of an orgasm the whole time, my body wound tight
with desire.
When the pool lights went out, Kyle laughed softly. “Two-hour timer.”
When I sat back on his lap, I wavered, my head spinning.
“Whoa,” he said, steadying my hips with his hands. “You okay?”
“I think . . . maybe just a little bit drunk still.”
He stood and stepped out of the hot tub, keeping one of my hands in his.
Then he helped me up and supported me while I stepped out.
“Will you stay the night?” he murmured, putting his arm around my waist.
“Sure . . . but—”
“Not for sex. I want you so bad I may need to put an ice pack on my balls,
but not tonight. Not when we’ve been drinking.”
“Good. Me too.” I shook my head and laughed. “I mean . . . you know what
I’m saying.”
He opened a deck box and took out a towel, wrapping it around me. We both
dried off and then went inside, where we shared a piece of the apple pie in the
fridge and changed into dry clothes.
Kyle gave me a T-shirt from his college basketball days. It was worn thin and
soft, and it just covered my ass. I was tall—not one of those women who looked
like she was wearing a dress when she put a men’s shirt on.
I liked the way he looked at me in his shirt. But it was getting late, and the
alcohol was making me sleepy. I’d gotten up at six to do yoga before work.
“Bed?” he asked, yawning.
“Yeah.” I laughed. “I feel old. Half a bottle of wine and two beers and I’m
out.”
“Me too.”
His bedroom just had a king-size bed and a large dresser with a framed photo
of the boys on it. The walls were bare.
Once we were in bed, he looked over at me in the darkness. “You like your
space while you’re sleeping, or can I, you know—”
“Yes,” I said quickly. “Snuggle the hell out of me. I’d love it.”
He spooned me, his chest warm and hard against my back. When he kissed
my jawline softly before laying his head down and drifting to sleep, I stayed
awake, willing myself not to cry.
It had been the best night I could ever remember having. Everything about
Kyle was good and right and hopeful. I hadn’t felt imperfect or wounded all
night.
But he was Reed’s brother. My first love. My only love. I didn’t want that to
be an issue, but it was. It had to be. Not just for me, but for him.
I was Meredith Hobbs, after all. The woman who could never outrun her
reputation. At least, not in Lovely.
Kyle
The boys were still asleep when Stephanie arrived to babysit Monday morning.
She looked like she’d just woken up herself, her T-shirt and sweats rumpled.
“Don’t let them play their tablets all day,” I told her. “They have to play
outside for at least two hours. And can you guys walk Hagrid?”
“Sure, Dr. Lockhart.” She yawned and gave me a puzzled look. “Can I ask
you a doctor question?”
“Sure.”
“Is there a prescription for really bad cramps? Like really, really bad.”
She looked so earnest that I felt for her. Poor kid. Sixteen was a rough age.
“Give your doctor’s office a call and ask them what your max dosage of
ibuprofen is,” I said. “You can usually take more than it says on the bottle. But
make sure you ask them for the right dosage.”
She nodded. “Okay, thanks.”
“See you this afternoon,” I said, grabbing my car keys. “Or I guess . . .
tomorrow morning since you’ll leave when Meredith gets here.”
“Is she your girlfriend? She’s really pretty.”
“Ah . . . no. Just a friend. Have a good day, Stephanie.”
“Thanks.”
She curled up on the couch with her phone, and I left.
I’d had the best weekend I could remember in a while. Meredith and I had
woken up slowly Saturday morning, both of us sneaking off to brush our teeth
before another make out session that left me uncomfortably hard again. Then
we’d made bacon and eggs together before she left.
If she’d used my toothbrush, I didn’t mind. I kind of liked the idea, actually.
I’d picked up the boys from my parents’ house and had taken them on a spur
of the moment trip to St. Louis for the rest of the weekend. We’d had dinner with
my youngest brother, Justin, and the four of us had gone to a Cardinals game.
We’d stayed the night in the city and spent Sunday at a museum.
Before I’d insisted on changes to my work schedule, I’d been on call at least
half the time on weekends. That meant no drinking and no traveling on those
weekends. Now I was only on call one weekend a month, and I enjoyed the
freedom to go places with my kids.
When I walked into my office and said good morning to my scheduler Marla,
I felt her eyes studying me.
“How was your weekend, Dr. Lockhart?” she asked.
“Great. Took the boys to the Lou. How about you?”
“Good. I did some quilting and gardening.”
The two nurses and two nursing assistants who worked in my office
wouldn’t be in until later, when I had office hours. After checking in with Marla,
I went to the hospital for my scheduled surgeries.
It was almost six thirty a.m., my favorite time of the workday. I liked seeing
the hospital shifting into motion. It was almost time for a shift change. I’d start
my surgeries as soon as the operating room team was ready, right at seven.
I saw several familiar faces as I rounded on patients. Trace Hunt, the owner
of the local hardware store, had gotten an emergency appendectomy over the
weekend, and he’d insisted on seeing me when I returned.
“Where were you?” he demanded as soon as I walked into his room, his
beady eyes narrowed. “I come into the hospital needin’ surgery, I expect to see
Kyle Lockhart standin’ over me with a scalpel, not some out-of-town hack who
don’t know shit from shinola!”
“Dr. Tenleigh works here, Trace. He’s a very good surgeon.”
“He’s not from here, though. How’m I supposed to trust some guy to cut my
gut open when I ain’t never even met him before?”
I pulled back the bed sheet and pressed gently on his round belly. “Any more
pain?”
He gave me a reluctant look. “No.”
I sat down in the chair next to his bed. “I read over your chart thoroughly. It
was a very clean procedure. You were probably a good forty-eight hours into the
appendicitis when you came in, so your appendix needed to come out before I
got back.”
He grunted. “Thought it was just the worst bellyache of my life at first. Then
I come in here sure I’m dyin’, and I see some stranger.”
“I’d trust Dr. Tenleigh to operate on me.”
“Guy’s an asshole.”
I couldn’t keep the hint of a smile from my face, because that was true.
“You’re on the road to recovery now. Do you have any questions for me?”
“Where’s my appendix?”
I furrowed my brow. “Where is it? It was removed.”
“I want that shit in a jar to put on the counter at the store. I told Dr. What’s
His Name, and he didn’t even answer me.”
“Uh . . . your appendix is long gone, Trace. It went to a medical waste
disposal facility.”
“Goddammit!” He shifted with agitation in the bed and then cringed from the
pain. “My insurance is gonna have to pay a shitload for this, and if I want my
shriveled up appendix, I should get it.”
“It was actually inflamed, and we don’t give patients their medical waste.”
He leaned in closer and gave me a serious look. “You woulda given it to
me.”
“No, I wouldn’t have.”
“You remember who sponsored your high school basketball team so you
could go to that fancy tournament in Indiana that time? Hunt’s Hardware, that’s
who. And this is how you repay me.” He shook his head with disgust.
“I wasn’t on call last weekend.”
“Off runnin’ around with that Hobbs girl,” he muttered.
“What?”
“Well, that Jeep of hers was in your driveway from Friday night to Saturday
morning. Billy Carmichael came into the store and said so.”
I rolled my eyes. Billy Carmichael was my nosy neighbor. “Trace, do you
have any questions for me about the appendectomy or your recovery?”
“Naw, what’s his name covered everything. I was still half doped up, but I
think I got it all.”
 “Looks like we’re keeping you through tomorrow while we run more
antibiotics through your IV. Enjoy the time to rest and relax. You work too
hard.”
“’Spose I do.” He drew his brows together with concern. “This cut ain’t
gonna get infected or anything, is it? I wasn’t watchin’ to see if that guy washed
his hands before the surgery.”
“I guarantee he did, and you’re on so many antibiotics that you won’t have
any problems.”
He nodded and leaned his head back against the pillow. I stood up.
“Get some rest, okay, Trace? You look like shit.”
He laughed. “I’ll try, Doc. Thanks for comin’ in to see me.”
“Wouldn’t miss it.”
I left to see my next patient, pushing aside my concerns about Meredith and
me being an object of gossip.
If I’d been thinking, I would’ve pulled her Jeep into my garage for the night.
Now word would spread that we were seeing each other, and I wasn’t prepared
for that. Not because of myself, but because of Jordan and Kyle. They’d been
teased at school over their mom’s issues, and it had hurt them. Kids could be
assholes. I didn’t want them hearing I had a girlfriend. It was too soon, and it
wasn’t even true.
Meredith and I were good for each other. I knew that for sure. But I wasn’t in
a rush to get into anything serious.
My operations today were all minor, and I was done by noon. I was having
lunch at a local deli when I had an urge to text Meredith. I’d waited all weekend,
so hopefully it wasn’t too soon.
Me: Hey, how was the rest of your weekend?
Meredith: It was good. Relaxing. How about you?
Me: Took the boys to St. Louis to see Justin.
Meredith: Sounds like fun.
Me: Hey, do you have plans Friday night?
 Meredith: Not yet. ;)
Me: Can I see you again?
Meredith: Sure, I’d like that.
Me: I had a really good time the other night.
Meredith: Me too.
Me: Have to drive back to my office. See you this afternoon.
Meredith: See you then.
I anticipated seeing her all afternoon as I saw patients. I was still replaying
our night together in my head, the feel of her already becoming a too-distant
memory.
Until she’d fed the hunger inside me, I hadn’t realized how strong it was.
Jerking off to porn didn’t even compare to being with her. I didn’t want us to be
the object of gossip for my boys’ sake, but it was inevitable.
Unless I stopped seeing her. And as sensible as that would be, I couldn’t. She
made me feel something I’d never felt before, and I couldn’t give it up.
We’d have to keep what we had low-profile. If we didn’t flaunt it, it would
just be whispered about. I wasn’t ready for anything more than that. The boys
and I were a threesome now, and I wanted them to feel secure in our family unit.
When I got home that afternoon, Meredith and the boys were just pulling
into the driveway, all smiling and eating ice cream cones.
“Hey,” she said, giving me one of the smiles that made me forget there were
other people in the world.
“Hey.”
“Dad, I got bubble gum,” Eric said, thrusting his cone toward me. “Try it.”
“Uh, no thanks.”
“Cotton candy?” Jordan offered as he jumped out of the Jeep.
“Even worse.”
“Vanilla?” Meredith tilted her cone toward me, and I walked around to the
driver’s side.
 “Vanilla, huh?”
I leaned down and tasted her cone.
“Vanilla’s a good place to start,” she said softly.
“It is. There are lots of other flavors to add later.”
Her playful smile made my dick stiffen. The boys took off for the garage,
and I leaned against Meredith’s Jeep door.
“You coming in?” I asked her.
“I have to go back to work, actually. We sold a crazy amount of cars between
Saturday and today. The paperwork needs to be caught up.”
“See you tomorrow, then?”
She nodded and tilted her ice cream cone toward me again. “Want another
lick?”
“Most definitely.”
I touched her hand as I brought the cone to my mouth and swiped another
taste.
“See you soon, Kyle.”
“Not soon enough.”
Her cheeks pinked as she backed out of the driveway. Across the street, Billy
Carmichael pulled into his driveway, got out of his car, and waved at me.
I didn’t wave back. Nosy bastard. He needed to live his own life instead of
paying so much attention to mine.
I did force myself not to stare as Meredith drove away, though. Maybe I
could keep Billy guessing.
Meredith
My dad walked into my office, his hand in a giant bag of beef jerky.
“How’s it going, Merry?” he asked, biting into a piece of jerky as he closed
my door.
I took off my glasses and turned away from my computer to face him.
“I’m good, Dad. How are you?”
He sat down in the chair in front of my desk, a little breathless just from the
walk in here. My worry for him was always present, whether in the front or the
back of my mind.
“We’re selling like gangbusters, so I’m a happy camper,” he said, grinning.
He was financially secure, but the salesman in my dad loved it when
business boomed. Morale at work this month was very high because everyone
knew he gave out bonuses at the end of big sales months. I’d heard some of the
guys in our repair shop talking about how they’d spend them already.
I loved that my dad didn’t just give bonuses to the sales staff. Every
employee got one, because our business was a team effort.
“It might be our biggest month ever,” I said. “I’m all caught up, and it’s our
biggest to date, so we’ll see if it holds.”
“People in this town know the importance of shopping local. We’re lucky to
have that.”
“Shopping local is good for them and us. A big dealership wouldn’t have
picked Jimmy Morris up in the middle of the night because the car he bought
from them two years ago broke down.”
“Dead battery,” Dad said with a chuckle. “He sure felt like an ass for cussing
out that new guy in the service shop who picked him up and changed it when he
found out that was the problem.”
There was never a good time to bring it up, but I couldn’t keep watching him
eat crap after bypass surgery and not say anything.
 “So how’s the diet and exercise plan going?”
He smiled sheepishly and held up the bag of beef jerky. “It’s hard to eat
healthy here. I had some broccoli last night with my meatloaf at the diner.”
I kept my cool, though I wanted to blow up and ask him if he had any idea
how much it upset me to see him putting his health in danger.
“What about walking in the morning before work? Have you tried that?”
He chuckled and grabbed another piece of jerky. “I walk to the toilet, does
that count?”
“Dad, I’m serious. I’ll come over and walk with you. You can do this—we
can do it together. I’ll cook you dinner every night if you want.”
He waved a hand. “You’ve got a life of your own, Merry.” His expression
turned serious. “In fact, that’s why I wanted to talk to you. Word has it you’re
seeing Kyle Lockhart.”
My cheeks warmed with embarrassment. I was still feeling the glow of my
first kiss with Kyle, still reveling in the giddy uncertainty of what might happen
next. We definitely weren’t an official thing, but the Lovely gossip mill had
churned it into more than it was.
“I’m not seeing him, really.”
“I can see by your face there’s something going on there.”
I looked down at my desk. “Yeah. There’s something. I’ve been tutoring his
boys after work every day for a couple weeks, and I guess . . . Kyle and I . . .”
“You don’t need to explain the details.” Dad shook his head. “I’d rather you
didn’t. I still don’t think any man out there is good enough for my little girl. And
I don’t like to bring up the Lockhart family because I know how painful it is for
you, but I can’t keep quiet on this. Don’t do this to yourself, Merry. Please.”
“There’s nothing serious between Kyle and me. And he’s a good man, Dad.
He really is.”
His brow creased with worry. “You’ll never be welcomed by that family.
They won’t let anyone forget what happened with Reed. Even after all these
years, I see you left out of things and talked about, and it hurts.”
My dad was normally a happy-go-lucky guy with an easy smile. He rarely
got serious like this, and it was tearing at my heart.
 “That’s Grace, Dad. Not Reed. Not Kyle. And not anyone else in the family.”
He shook his head. “You think you can sit across from Reed and his wife at
Christmas dinner? Grace Lockhart won’t stand for it.”
I sighed softly. “You’re way ahead of yourself. Kyle and I are just spending
time together.”
“I’ve noticed how happy you’ve been these past few days. You haven’t
found any man worth spending time with in a very long time.”
“It’s not like I’m in demand, Dad.”
He sat forward in his chair. “And why is that? You’re beautiful, smart, and
everything else a man could want in a woman. It’s because Grace Lockhart
won’t let go of her hard feelings over you not marrying Reed.”
“Well, I did leave him waiting at the altar. That was awful of me.”
“How many years should you have to feel like a pariah over it?”
“I don’t know that I’m a pariah, exactly . . .”
“You don’t get included in things, Merry. Hospital fundraisers, shopping
trips, those damned blanket-making parties your mother used to go to . . . Grace
Lockhart has made sure you’re shut out of all of it.”
I nodded. “She doesn’t like me, Dad. And she never will. I accepted that a
long time ago.”
“If you accept it, stay away from Kyle Lockhart. I won’t see you hurt by that
family ever again.”
“It’s not Kyle’s fault.”
“Don’t waste your time on a man whose loyalty lies with his family, when
his mother is a spiteful old witch. You’ll end up hurt.”
“Like I said, Kyle and I are just—”
My phone dinged with a new text, and I looked down at my desk.
Kyle: Thinking about you.
I flipped it over so the screen faced the desk and cleared my throat. “Anyway
. . . I hear what you’re saying, Dad.”
He shook his head. “Just like I hear what you’re saying about my diet?”
“It’s similar, yes. Only Kyle Lockhart has a minimal chance of killing me.”
 He blew right past my dig about his diet. “Just think about it, will you?
Please?”
“Yes. I will, Dad.”
He left my office, but his concerns stayed with me. Deep down, I knew he
was right. Kyle and I could hook up at his place, but could there ever be
anything more between us? Anything real?
Not likely. My dad was right; the Lockharts were a fiercely loyal family.
Kyle would never turn his back on them to be with me. And I’d never want him
to.
I left work a couple hours early and took Jordan and Eric out to a movie at
the downtown Lovely theater. It was a beautiful old building with lots of fond
childhood memories for me.
“You want some candy?” Eric offered, holding his box of M&M’s out
toward me.
“I do, thanks,” I said. “Trade?”
I gave him the popcorn and took a few M&M’s, letting them melt slowly in
my mouth. The movie we were watching was animated, and it was cute. Mostly,
I was enjoying the mental break, and the snacks were a nice bonus.
I’d texted Kyle about taking the boys to the movie, and when we got back to
the house, his Range Rover was in the garage. I pulled into the driveway,
planning to let the boys out and go home.
“Aren’t you coming in?” Jordan asked.
“Um . . . sure.” I put my Jeep in park and followed them inside through the
garage.
“Hey, guys,” Kyle said when we walked into the kitchen. “How was the
movie?”
“Good,” Eric said.
The boys both went into the living room, leaving Kyle and me alone.
“How are you?” he asked, leaning a hip against the kitchen counter.
I shrugged. “Kind of wishing I lived in a city of a million people.”
“Yeah, Lovely’s a little too small at times. Is someone bothering you?”
“Not really,” I said softly. “I’m just realizing you can never reinvent yourself
in a place like this. The past is always there, and everyone always knows about
it.”
“Everyone has a past, though.”
“Yeah.” I leaned against the kitchen counter across from him. “You know,
the finance guy at the dealership calls me ‘The Runaway Bride.’ Never
Meredith.”
“Sounds like a real asshole.”
“Yeah, he is. He doesn’t do it in front of my dad.”
“Have you ever thought about telling him to stop?”
“After so many years, I’ve started to feel like he’s right. Like that’s who I am
to most people around here.”
“Definitely not to me.”
I smiled. “Thanks.”
He opened his mouth to say something else, when Jordan came into the
kitchen.
“Practice starts in five minutes, Dad.”
Kyle glanced up at the wall clock. “I forgot that was tonight. Let me turn off
the heat on the stove.”
“I can take him,” I said.
“You sure?”
“Yeah, it’s no problem.”
“You want to come back for dinner?”
“I would, but I’m full from all the snacks at the movie.”
He arched his brows with amusement. “I take it the kids are, too?”
“Maybe.”
“You’re a bad influence.” He winked at me, and I warmed all over.
“Let’s go,” Jordan said, tugging on my arm.
“Don’t forget your glove,” Kyle called after us.
I dropped Jordan off at the baseball diamonds, drawing a glance from Louisa
Jones, who had graduated high school with me and was dropping off her son.
But I was out of energy to care for the day. I went home, changed into my
running clothes and shoes, and went for a long, mind-clearing run through town.
 At least, it was mostly clear. I couldn’t get rid of the thoughts about Kyle
kissing my neck and pressing my body against his. Or the vulnerability in his
eyes as he told me he’d never had a blow job. Or my burning desire to give him
one.
There was no amount of running that would take away those thoughts.
Kyle
The weekdays passed by painfully slow. I was focused at work and at home, but
when I had downtime on the drive to work or after the kids were in bed, my
mind wandered to Meredith.
I wondered what she was doing, and I replayed our evening together over
and over. When I was fantasizing about her in bed one night, a thought slipped
into my head unconsciously.
Reed had fucked her.
I tried to force the thought—and the images—from my mind, but I couldn’t.
He’d probably been her first. It wasn’t jealousy that I felt—hell, she was eight
years younger than me, and I couldn’t have been with her back then—but it was
something I didn’t like.
He’d been places I hadn’t. He’d gotten her off. Her long, perfect legs had
been wrapped around his waist with nothing between their bodies.
It was an odd feeling. I’d never been with a woman one of my brothers had
been with. It was sort of an unspoken rule that we didn’t go there.
He knew how she sounded when she came. She’d probably done all sorts of
dirty things with him when they were together.
And now I wanted her to do all those things with me. What would it be like
for her? Would she compare the two of us?
From my one evening with Meredith, I could tell sex wasn’t a chore for her.
The way she’d moaned and rocked her hips against mine in the hot tub had
shown me she was just as worked up as I was. I’d never experienced that.
Sex with Kim had always been perfunctory—her on her back, me on top, I
fucked her until we both came. She’d never been open to anything else. Why
mess with what’s already working fine, she’d said?
It was how she’d gotten her way when she wanted something from me—by
withholding sex. Vacations, jewelry, and the addition on our house had all been
granted when I couldn’t take any more blue balls.
Sex after giving her something she wanted had always felt tinged to me. She
didn’t want me, she wanted things, and sex was her only hold on me.
A woman who enjoyed sex purely for what it was? That sounded like an
impossible dream to me.
Until now. Meredith had no reason to pretend to want me, and I wanted her
more than my next breath. I felt like I was counting the minutes until she came
over Friday night.
I’d dropped the boys off with my parents and was making homemade pizza
when she rang the doorbell.
“Hey,” she said when I opened the door.
“Hi.”
She bit her lip as she walked inside. “There’s something very sexy about you
drying your hands off on that dish towel.”
“Oh, yeah?”
“Maybe it’s your big, manly hands doing something so domestic.”
“So you checked my hand size?”
She laughed and took me by surprise when she grabbed a handful of my shirt
and tipped her face up to mine. “I already know what you’ve got going on down
there, Lockhart. You tortured me with it last weekend.”
“Tortured, huh?”
“Don’t worry, Dickory finished what you didn’t.”
I dropped the dish towel, groaned, and cupped her ass, pulling her closer.
“I’ll finish it right fucking now if you want.”
“Do you want to? In general, I mean? Have sex with me?”
“Are you serious?”
She flushed. “Kind of. I mean, we both said we don’t have casual sex.”
“You wouldn’t be casual to me. But if you don’t want to—”
“No, I do.”
She looked up at me through thick, dark lashes, her chest rising and falling
against mine. I couldn’t take it—I shoved her against the wall, cushioning the
back of her head with my hand, and crushed my mouth to hers in a hard,
punishing kiss.
I felt her moan vibrating against my chest as she wrapped a leg around my
waist and pressed her body to mine, practically climbing me.
The heat between us was more than physical. I craved her on a deep, primal
level I had no control over.
“We can skip dinner,” I murmured in her ear.
“It smells so good, though.” She slid down me, her feet landing on the floor.
“And we have all night, right?”
“We do.”
She cupped my cheeks in her hands and gave me a serious look. “The way
you look at me . . . it makes me feel amazing. Sexy.”
“You’re unbelievably sexy.”
“Not in my mind. It’s been so long that . . .” She cleared her throat. “What
I’m trying to say is, I feel the same way about you. I think you’re crazy sexy.
And you’re like me—not getting laid by someone new every week. I like that.”
I brought her hand up to my lips and kissed her knuckles, then led her into
the kitchen.
“Pizza and white wine or beer,” I said. “Figured we probably shouldn’t mix
them again.”
She smiled. “So we don’t end up passed out in bed by ten?”
“Pretty much. And I can’t drink at all because I’m on call.”
“You might have to go into work?”
“Only if there’s an emergency. The on-call surgeon has the flu so we
switched weekends.”
We talked about work and the boys over dinner. I was getting to know
Meredith better, and I’d figured out she wasn’t one to talk about herself. I had to
pry that stuff out of her. There was an underlying self-consciousness to her,
which was hard to believe.
When we were done eating, she picked up the dishes from the table before I
could get to them and took them to the sink to rinse.
I approached her from behind, put my arms around her waist, and spoke in
her ear. “Leave those.”
 Her long dress was sleeveless, and I felt goose bumps break out on her arms.
She set down the plate in her hand, and I leaned down to brush her hair aside and
kiss her neck.
Sighing softly, she tipped her head to the side, and I kissed all the way up her
neck and back down again, sliding down the shoulder of her dress.
“Kyle,” she whispered, pushing her ass back against me.
At my height, my erection was halfway on her lower back, but I still felt a
hot, clawing need for her when she rubbed against me like that.
I lowered my hands to gather the bottom of her dress, working it up until it
was around her waist. She gasped and then moaned as I ran my palms over the
silky fabric of her panties and then down her bare thighs.
“You want me in here tonight?” I said in her ear, slipping my fingers beneath
the seam of her panties.
“Oh, God.” She braced her hands against the counter and let her head fall
back against my chest. “Yes.”
“I bet this pussy tastes sweet, doesn’t it?”
She spun around and wrapped her arms around my neck, pressing her body
to mine and kissing me hard. I kept her dress hiked up so I could slide my hands
under her panties and squeeze her ass.
Her moan told me she liked it when I was a little rough with her. That was
uncharted and very hot territory for me.
I pulled away from her and spoke against her mouth. “Bend over the island
and show me your ass.”
As her chest rose and fell breathlessly, she licked her lips and went to the
island, facing it. My cock throbbed with need for her as she hiked the dress
around her hips and then shimmied a little as she slid her panties down.
“Stop right there,” I said when they were past her ass and around her upper
thighs.
I couldn’t let myself get too close to her pussy yet, or I’d lose what little
control I had.
She leaned her elbows on the island, and I approached, eyeing her perfect,
round ass. I ran my palm over the soft curves of it, and she sighed.
 “Smack me,” she said in a tone so low it was almost a whisper.
I closed my eyes and forced myself not to cream in my pants. Fuck. This was
the stuff of my fantasies—a gorgeous woman with a sexual appetite that
included a little kink.
I drew my hand back and smacked one cheek, then the other. Then I did it
again, a little harder, and Meredith whimpered and clutched the edge of the
island’s counter.
“That’s a good sound, right?” I asked, concerned I might’ve hurt her.
“Very good.” There was a smile in her voice. “I’ve never asked for that, but
I’ve always wanted to.”
I leaned over her back and spoke in her ear. “You can ask me for anything.
And tell me if you don’t like something, okay?”
“I will. And . . . same with you.”
“I honestly don’t think you could do anything I wouldn’t like. And I’m six
five and two hundred and ten pounds, so you can’t hurt me.”
She turned to face me. “You’re worried you’ll hurt me?”
“I’m a big guy. Sometimes I forget my own strength.”
“I’m a very sturdy girl. Please don’t worry about that. I don’t want you to
hold back.”
I arched a brow. “You sure about that?”
“Very sure. And so turned on.”
I grabbed her waist and flipped her back around, dropping to my knees
behind her. My hands were practically shaking with desire as I ran them up and
down the backs of her thighs to her ass.
When I leaned forward and kissed one of her ass cheeks, she sucked in a
breath. I kissed the other one and then nipped at it like I’d been dying to do since
the moment she’d pulled her panties down.
“Oh . . . shit,” she said softly. “That feels good.”
I eased her panties down a couple more inches, and she made a panting
sound. My cock was straining against my pants, my balls tight and aching.
When I ran my hands back up to her ass and squeezed it, she moaned. I stood
up and pressed my chest to her back, pulling her dress off over her head.
 She tipped her head back against my chest and wrapped an arm around my
neck. I let my hands wander up and down her soft, perfect skin, squeezing her
breasts through her bra, tracing the lines of her collarbone with my fingertips.
“I’m dying to make you come,” I said in her ear.
“Same.” She wound her fingers up into my hair and tugged.
“Why don’t we go into the bedroom?”
“Yes.”
She eased out from in front of me and slid her panties the rest of the way
down, kicking off her shoes and stepping out of them. My mouth went dry as I
took her in.
Fucking hell, was she gorgeous. So tall and lean and completely bare
between her thighs. Thank God my blinds were down, or my neighbor Tom
might have a heart attack just from looking through the windows of my breakfast
nook.
Self-consciousness flickered across her expression as she reached behind her
back to unfasten her bra. I stroked a hand across my bulging erection, hoping
she’d see that she couldn’t be any more perfect in my eyes.
She let the bra fall to the floor, and I drank in the absolute magnificence of
her.
“You’re so beautiful,” I said. “I could just look at you all night.”
She smiled and came closer. “I have something else in mind, actually. Show
me to the bedroom?”
I led the way while half turned around, unable to look away from her. The
bounce of her tits was worth running into the wall over, and I did—twice.
When we got to the bedroom, she put a palm on my chest and met my gaze.
“Stand at the foot of the bed and face me.”
I wanted to throw her on the bed and fuck her senseless, but I wanted to
please her even more, so I did what she asked.
She stood in front of me and tugged my T-shirt up and over my head. As she
reached for the button and fly on my jeans to unfasten them, she kissed my
chest, her lips leaving a soft, sweet trail on my skin.
I could have come at that moment, without her even touching me. The
reverence I felt in her touch was like nothing I’d ever experienced. I kept myself
under control as she slid down my jeans and got to her knees in front of me.
She’d left my boxer briefs on, and she ran her tongue over my cock through
the fabric.
“Holy shit,” I mumbled, clenching my hands into fists at my sides.
“I want this,” she said, stroking me through the briefs. “I want every inch of
you in my mouth, Kyle.”
I swallowed hard and ran my hand over her hair, my blood pumping hard.
Every muscle in my body was clenched as she slid down my briefs and my cock
jutted out and into her face.
She pulled my jeans and boxer briefs off and threw them to the side, then
told me to sit down.
“Tell me what feels good,” she said softly, leaning her face into my lap.
Her warm breath on the tip of my dick made my mouth drop open, and then I
felt her warm, wet mouth on me and I groaned loudly.
It was like nothing I’d ever felt. Her soft lips and tongue felt like heaven. Not
one inch of me went untouched as she licked and teased. I was breathing hard,
telling myself to hold on and savor this for as long as possible.
She sucked me all the way into her mouth then, and I yelled out an
incomprehensible sound. I had two fists full of the bedspread, my knuckles white
with strain.
“It’s . . . good,” I managed to say. “So fucking good.”
She rewarded me with a moan, and the vibration of it against my cock made
my hips shoot up off the bed.
When she added her hands, I groaned long and loud, overwhelmed by the
bliss of it. She couldn’t fit me all the way in her mouth, though she tried to. Her
hands stroked me off where her mouth couldn’t reach.
I was getting close to coming when she moved her mouth from my dick to
my balls, taking my whole ball sac into her mouth and sucking on it.
“Fuuuuck, Mer . . . that’s . . . Oh, fuck.” I groaned and stroked my hand over
her hair.
She played with me then, sucking me just long enough to get me going and
then slowing way down. I sat up on the bed and watched her, awed by the sight.
I’d never, ever thought I’d experience anything so erotic and sensual. Her
pink lips slid up and down my cock, her breasts bouncing and her hand working
up and down my wet, hard-as-hell shaft.
My orgasm had built up so intensely it was like a freight train. I couldn’t stop
it this time.
“I’m gonna come,” I said breathlessly. “You might want . . .”
I thought she’d want to move away so I could finish myself off, but she
sucked me even harder. Within a couple seconds, I was coming in her mouth. It
was an explosion of sensation. I yelled out her name as she sucked me
completely dry.
My hips fell back to the mattress then, my entire body limp and satisfied.
Beyond satisfied. I’d never, ever come like that before.
“I can’t even think right now,” I said. “That was fucking incredible.”
Meredith lay down next to me on her side, smiling.
“Come here,” I said, reaching a hand around her neck.
She leaned down and kissed me, the taste of me still on her lips.
“Thank you,” I said.
“You don’t need to thank me. I loved it, too.”
“You’re amazing. I didn’t even know . . . it could ever be like that.”
She took my hand and guided it between her legs. “That really got me going,
and I was already hot from in the kitchen,” she said softly. “Will you . . . ?”
“Hell yes. I’m dying to taste you.”
“No,” she said, as I was about to get up. “Use your fingers. I want to look at
your face . . . the first time.”
“I’ll give you anything you want, Meredith. Anything. I’ve got condoms.”
“I want this.” She pushed on my hand. “Now.”
I got up on my elbow and pushed a finger inside her. “Shit, you’re so wet.”
“Yes.” She moaned softly. “Oh, God. Right there. Just like that.”
I rubbed her swollen clit and eased another finger inside her. She moved her
hips in the same rhythm as my hand, moaning nonstop now.
It was the sexiest sight I’d ever seen. I leaned down to kiss her, and she bit
my lower lip, tugging it between her teeth. She was right on the edge—I could
feel it—so I leaned back up and looked into her eyes.
“Come on, baby,” I whispered. “Give it up.”
With a loud cry, she did. I rubbed her harder and faster, and she arched her
back as she came against my fingers.
She dropped back down to the mattress and smiled. “That was perfect. So
perfect.”
“Do you need anything? A drink?”
“Some water would be great.”
“I’ll go get it.” I slid out of bed, and she watched me slide my boxer briefs
back on. “You feel like watching a movie in bed, maybe?”
“That sounds really nice.” I was almost out of the room when she called after
me. “I brought cookies. Can you get them out of my bag? If you don’t mind me
eating in your bed, I mean.”
I laughed softly. “You could saw the bed into little pieces, and this smile
would still be on my face. Right now you could ask me for anything, and I’d say
yes.”
She grinned happily and pulled the covers up over her chest. “Just the water.
And the cookies. Oh, and take the underwear back off when you get here. And
snuggle me hard all night long.”
“You got it.”
I felt like the luckiest guy alive. I could have broken into a song as I walked
into the kitchen to get her water and cookies.
Yeah, it was partially because of the blow job. But it was also from knowing
she’d wanted to do it, and she’d actually enjoyed it. And from her wanting me to
pleasure her in return.
I already wished this night didn’t have to end. Friday nights were all I could
give Meredith right now. The thought of her wanting more and finding it with
another man was already nagging in the back of my mind. I couldn’t lose this.
Meredith
We watched a romantic comedy, and I snuggled into Kyle’s side, my head on his
shoulder. I hadn’t had this kind of intimacy with a man since . . . Reed.
That was a little weird. Never in my wildest dreams had I considered back
then that I’d one day be naked in bed with Reed’s older brother.
It felt right, though. At least, in this moment. Kyle understood me in ways no
one else ever had. He knew what it was like to be desperately lonely but
unwilling to bang someone for the hell of it.
I wasn’t casual to him. I’d needed to hear that. Though we couldn’t have a
“normal” relationship where he took me home to meet his parents, maybe we
could have something.
We finished the first movie and started a second. I didn’t want to fall asleep
because I knew our closeness would be over as soon as I woke up.
In another life, he would have been mine. Jordan and Eric, too. I already felt
an undeniable attachment to his boys. What had started out as after-school help
with homework had grown into something much more for me.
Kyle was warm, and he held me against him so closely that I drifted off to
sleep during the movie. I was woken up by the blare of a ringing sound next to
the bed that made me jump about a foot into the air.
“Shh, hey . . . it’s okay,” Kyle said. “It’s just my phone.”
He slid the screen, and the loud ringing mercifully stopped.
“Hello?” His sleepy voice was deep and sexy. “Right, I’m on my way.”
He kissed my forehead and slid out of bed. “I have to go into work.”
“What time is it?”
“Four fifteen.”
“Sorry I freaked out, but your ringtone could wake the dead.”
He laughed as he pulled on his boxer briefs. “That’s the idea. It’s my on-call
ringtone.”
 I slid out of bed and turned on the bedside lamp.
“Go back to bed,” Kyle said.
“No, I can go home.”
“Get your gorgeous ass back in bed. Sleep in. I won’t be back for a while.”
“What if your mom brings the kids home or something?”
“She won’t. I’m picking them up.”
“Okay. I may stay, then.”
He smiled, pulling on his pants and a T-shirt. “I’d come over and give you a
proper kiss good-bye, but I’ve got to go. It’s an emergency.”
“Go. Drive safely.”
He left, and I switched the light off. When I got back into bed, I crawled over
to his side, which was still warm. His pillow smelled faintly of his woodsy
cologne.
It was nice. More than nice.
I hoped he’d trust me enough to tell me what Kim had done to him. I could
already tell no woman had ever cherished Kyle the way he deserved. He wanted
to please me so badly, but he didn’t realize everything he did drove me wild for
him.
I fell back asleep thinking about the sounds he’d made earlier. His
uncontrolled groans had been the sexiest thing I’d ever heard.
When I woke up a few hours later, the house was quiet. I wondered if he was
in surgery right now, putting someone’s fractured body back together.
As soon as I was out of bed and dressed, my urge was to run. I didn’t belong
here, waking up in Kyle’s house like we were together. His mother could drop
over unannounced at any moment, and all hell would break loose.
Or anyone else, for that matter. No one could know I was here. Kyle hadn’t
said so, but I knew.
I pulled aside the curtains to see if any neighbors were outside. The driveway
was empty. My heart pounded as I wondered if someone had stolen my Jeep.
In Lovely? The worst crime that ever went down here was driving the wrong
way on a one-way street.
I went to the kitchen and opened the garage, seeing that Kyle had pulled my
Jeep inside.
How thoughtful of him. Maybe there was rain in the forecast. I had left my
top down.
The voice inside my head was telling me to get out of here while I still had
my dignity and not to risk getting caught by a member of Kyle’s family or one of
the neighbors.
But with a deep breath, I decided to be brave instead. I had no plans today.
Maybe I could do something to help Kyle out since he was probably going to be
tired when he got home.
The sound of whining from the mudroom caught my attention, and I went in
and found Hagrid. He’d peed in his kennel and was giving me sad eyes.
“Poor guy,” I said, opening the kennel door. “Let’s get you outside.”
He went right to the French doors, and I opened one so he could do his
business. Then I gathered the wet blankets from his kennel and went downstairs
to find the laundry room.
It was kind of a mess, which made me smile. This was a bachelor’s laundry
room, with dirty clothes all over the floor and clean ones stacked in piles on top
of the dryer.
I put the blankets in the wash and went back upstairs to make some coffee.
Hagrid sat at the back door, waiting patiently to be let in. I opened the door, and
he ran to his food bowl in the laundry room and whined.
When I poured food into his dish, he stuck his face right into it and chowed.
I drank a cup of coffee and looked through the fridge and freezer.
There wasn’t much, other than frozen pizzas, waffles, eggs, and a few other
staples. But then, it would be hard for a six-foot-wide Viking fridge to ever look
full. This kitchen was the definition of overkill, with industrial-grade stainless
appliances that had to have cost at least thirty thousand dollars.
Nothing but the best for Kim Lockhart. She’d been a real diva, making no
secret of her plastic surgeries and the cost of her designer shoe collection.
The best thing she’d ever done for Kyle was leave him. Not that I wasn’t sad
for Jordan and Eric—they’d been through more than kids should ever be put
through with Kim’s alcoholism and decision to leave.
 The Lockhart boys needed nurturing, and that was something I was good at. I
sat down at the kitchen table and made a grocery list and then went to the local
grocery store, leaving the garage open so I could get back into the house.
An hour later, I had hamburgers cooking on the stove, and my KitchenAid
mixer was combining cookie dough ingredients.
I loved cooking and baking. Nothing made me feel closer to my mom. She’d
taught me several make-ahead dinners, which were perfect for a busy dad like
Kyle. I’d gone home to get a few of my favorite utensils and tools and had also
dropped by the downtown farmers’ market for produce.
Chili was the easiest. It went into a freezer bag I labeled with reheating
instructions and put in the freezer. Then I made chocolate chip cookies, working
on a lasagna while they were baking. Once the lasagna was assembled, I covered
the foil container and included a note on top with cooking instructions.
Hagrid was at my feet the whole time, gobbling up any morsel that fell to the
ground. He loved being talked to; his eyes lit up and his curly tail wagged every
time I said his name.
I baked a batch of banana nut muffins and assembled a macaroni and cheese
casserole next, figuring the boys wouldn’t want anything exotic.
I was cleaning up the kitchen and waiting for the last batch of muffins to
finish baking when I heard the garage door opening. My heart froze in my chest,
and I got the urge to run again.
What if it was Grace with the boys? What if Kyle was still at work, and they
were stopping by the house? God, she would murder me if she busted me in
Kyle’s kitchen. There would legitimately be a homicide, likely committed by
one of my own knives.
Eric flew into the house, grinning. “Meredith! Want to go swimming with
me?”
“Um . . .”
“Hey, Meredith,” Jordan said, picking up a muffin from the counter as he
walked through the kitchen to the living room.
Kyle came in last. My shoulders dropped with relief. He might think I’d
overstepped by invading his kitchen, but he wouldn’t run me out of the place in
tears like Grace would.
“Hey,” he said, smiling. “It smells good in here.”
“I hope you don’t mind. I felt like cooking and baking.”
“Mind?” He picked up a cookie from the counter and took a bite. “This is
fantastic. Thank you.”
“Oh, I have to run downstairs real quick.”
I’d put Hagrid’s blankets in the dryer, so I took them out and threw Jordan’s
baseball clothes into the dryer. I’d seen them on the floor and figured they
probably needed washing.
I was folding Hagrid’s blankets when I walked back into the kitchen, and
Kyle gave me a confused look.
“Did that scoundrel piss his bed again?”
“A little.”
“Thanks for washing those.”
“No trouble.”
Eric pulled on my dress. “Meredith, will you?”
“Will I what?”
“Go swimming with me? Isn’t that why you came over? To see me?”
I looked at Kyle, hoping for help, but he just smirked.
“I . . . did, yes. I’m here to see you. And if you guys don’t have plans, I’ll
swim with you for a bit.”
“Yes!” Eric ran out of the room.
“I wasn’t trying to get myself invited to stay,” I whispered to Kyle.
He shrugged. “You have to stay now.”
“Is it okay?”
“Of course, it’s okay. Stay all day and night if you want.” He furrowed his
brow. “But I guess we should keep it . . . just friendly around the boys.”
“Right.”
“That won’t be easy,” he said in a low tone, approaching me and reaching
out to touch my hip. “I’m sorry I had to leave so suddenly last night.”
“I understand, it was work. Was it something serious?”
He sighed heavily. “Yeah. Two-car accident. One driver was dead on arrival,
and the other might lose his leg. It’s touch and go.”
“Oh, no.”
“Yeah.” He picked up a muffin from the counter and ate it. “Smells like chili
in here.”
“Oh, I made you a few dinners for this week. They’re in the freezer.”
His eyes softened. “That was really nice. Let me pay you for it.”
“No way. I love cooking and baking.” I found the dishwasher detergent
under the sink, filled the dispenser, and started it. “Hey, if you want to catch up
on sleep, I’ll hang out with the boys.”
“I’m not missing out on you in a swimsuit,” he said softly.
My cheeks warmed. “I did bring one with me, but it’s a bikini. I thought I
might need it last night. Should I run home and get a one-piece?”
He laughed at my suggestion. “No. Austin’s wife, Hannah, wears bikinis
over here all the time. The boys are used to it.”
“I’m ready!” Eric burst into the kitchen wearing swim trunks and goggles, a
blow-up dinosaur pool toy around his waist.
“We better hurry up and change,” Kyle said. “Jordan, you swimming with
us?”
“Maybe later.”
I went into the bathroom with my bag and changed into the new red bikini
I’d bought. By the time I got out to the pool, Kyle and Eric were already in the
water.
Kyle looked me over with an appreciative grin. I forced myself not to think
about being in the pool with him last weekend, my legs wound around his waist
as we kissed.
Eric had endless energy. We played water guns, a game called Shark, and
once Jordan came out, swam relay races.
Midway through the afternoon, Kyle ordered pizza, and we all went inside to
eat. I was wiped out from the day in the sun.
After we ate, Kyle fell asleep on the couch, and Eric sat on my lap while we
watched Harry Potter. I was so content, feeling like I’d finally found people I
could give to and take from. And these three made me want to give all I had and
then some.
When Kyle woke up and asked us in his sexy, sleepy voice what we wanted
to do for dinner, I realized for the first time that I was on very dangerous ground.
I was falling for him and his boys. Or maybe I already had. Our day together
had felt like the family I dreamed of.
But they weren’t mine. Outside of this house, we weren’t any kind of
foursome. That was a sobering thought.
“Actually, I need to get home,” I said.
“Aw, really?” Jordan said.
“Yeah. But I had so much fun today, guys. Thank you.”
I got my bag, and Kyle offered to carry my mixer and baking sheets out to
my Jeep for me.
“Hey,” he said when we were alone in the garage. “I’m glad you stayed.”
“Me too.”
He put my stuff in the back of my Jeep and then came around to the driver’s
seat, where I was buckling myself in. My heart raced as he cupped my cheek and
kissed me gently.
“Next Friday night?” he asked.
“Yes. But how about my place? I’ll make dinner.”
“Okay. You’re amazing, Meredith. I’ll be thinking about you.”
I smiled at him. “Same.”
And as I drove home, I realized for the first time that my constant dreamy
thoughts of him might not be a good thing. Not for my heart, anyway.
This time was different. This time, I was a twenty-nine-year-old woman
who’d lived and learned from her mistakes. I knew heartbreak and loneliness
now, and I never wanted to go back to it. Not after finding something that felt so
right for the first time in my life.
I wanted Kyle Lockhart to be mine. But I didn’t see how that could ever be.
Kyle
The next afternoon, I walked into my parents’ house, braced for an argument.
When my mother had texted this morning asking me to drop by for lunch if I
could, I knew it was probably about Meredith.
“You made it,” she said as I walked into the kitchen.
“How are you, Mom?”
“Oh, no complaints. I’ve just had Maxine Thompson over to discuss the
flowers for Mason and April’s wedding, so that was nice.”
“The backyard’s a beautiful spot for a wedding.”
“Thank you. Your father and I are thrilled that Mason found the one.”
“Yeah, April’s great.” I approached the kitchen counter and nodded with
appreciation. “That chicken salad looks great. Can we eat soon? I have to be
back by one fifteen.”
“Sure. Just sit down, and I’ll bring everything over to the table.”
Her homemade chicken salad was one of my favorites, and I was hungry. It
was all I could do to wait as she put croissants, chicken salad, chips, and a
pitcher of iced tea on the table. Finally, she sat down.
“How’s work today?” she asked.
“Just the usual.”
“I heard Marion Carter had a biopsy, or was that just a rumor?”
I shrugged as I spooned chicken salad onto a croissant. “You know I can’t
discuss patients, Mom.”
“So she is a patient, then?”
“I didn’t say that. I don’t disclose anything about anyone, and you know it.”
“Of course I do. I just thought that if she is going through something like
that, I’d bring over a casserole or something.”
I decided a change of subject was in order. “The boys said Dad took them
flying Saturday morning. They had a good time.”
 “Good. Your father’s been tinkering with his plane a lot lately, and he hasn’t
done much flying.”
“Where’s he at today?”
“Lunch with a client. Full-time retirement doesn’t suit him, so it’s good he
took on a few clients again.”
“You guys should travel. There’s a big world out there to see.”
She smiled. “Everyone who matters to me is right here in Lovely. Other than
Justin, of course.”
“Hopefully, he can make it to Mason’s bachelor party weekend.”
“I hope so, too.” She set her sandwich down and met my gaze across the
table. “Kyle, I need to talk to you about something.”
“Sure.” I grabbed another croissant to make a second sandwich.
“I know you’re seeing Meredith.”
“Yeah?”
“It’s all over town that her Jeep is at your house every day now.”
“We already talked about this, Mom.”
She sighed and rested her elbows on the table. “Well, I think it’s time for a
more honest conversation about it.”
“Were you dishonest last time?” I arched my brows with amusement.
“Because I wasn’t.”
“This isn’t a joke,” she said sharply. “After what Jordan and Eric have been
through, I can’t believe you don’t understand the gravity of this.”
“No one understands what my kids have been through better than I do.”
“Kim was an opportunist. Once she had you locked in, she showed her true
colors. Even before the drinking started, she was spending so much money and
getting all those plastic surgeries—”
I cut her off. “I know all this, Mom. What’s your point?”
“My point is that you’ve traded one bad choice in women for another. You
get blinded by the physical part of a relationship and don’t see what’s coming
until it’s too late.”
I sat back from the table. “You’re way off base comparing Meredith to Kim.
And you’re making a lot of unfair assumptions.”
 “I didn’t say anything about Kim for years because she was your choice.
Your wife. And I respected that. Until she started putting the kids in danger, I
didn’t feel it was my business.”
“That situation has nothing to do with Meredith.”
Her eyes widened with disbelief. “It has everything to do with her. I won’t
make the same mistake this time. I’m trying to help you see the light before it’s
too late.”
Usually, my mom’s nosiness didn’t bother me as much as it was right now. I
was on the verge of losing my cool.
“Listen,” I said, “whatever’s between me and Meredith is just between us.
The boys don’t even know about it yet because we’re being very careful. You’re
operating on a lot of assumptions, thinking I’ll fill in the blanks for you. I’m not
going to. Stay out of this, and let me live my own life.”
“It’s not just your life, though, Kyle. It’s Jordan’s and Eric’s, too. I won’t sit
idly by and let my grandsons be hurt again.”
“They were hurt by their mother.” My voice rose with anger. “And she’s
gone now, so how can it happen again?”
“Meredith is digging her claws into all three of you. She got to you through
those boys.”
I shook my head in disbelief. “No, she didn’t.”
“I know you don’t see it, because you don’t know how manipulative she is.
But this whole thing started with her tutoring your boys. Bringing them cookies.
Being the maternal figure they’re both missing. And that is how she hooked
you.”
My single note of laughter held no humor. “You know how she hooked me,
Mom? You really want the details? She’s sexy and sweet and warm. Nothing like
Kim. Couldn’t be more opposite, actually. And it was me who pursued her, not
the other way around.”
She gave me a stunned look. “You asked her to tutor the boys because you
liked her?”
“No. She offered that. And she left every day when I got home. But I
developed feelings.”
 “Exactly what she wanted.”
I pinched the bridge of my nose, forcing myself to stay calm. “You couldn’t
be more wrong about her, Mom.”
“I’ve known her for a long time. I can see this from a distance, Kyle. You’re
lonely, and that’s clouding your judgment. If you feel ready to date again, why
not—”
“No. Whatever you’re about to say, no.” I stood up. “We’re done talking
about this, Mom. Stay out of my personal life.”
She recoiled. “I’m your mother. How can I stay out of your personal life?”
“By not talking about it, with me or anyone else. I despise the gossip mill in
this town, and I thought you did, too.”
“Is it gossip if it’s the truth?”
“Sometimes, yeah.”
She stood up, too. “Have you even considered Reed’s feelings? You’re
sleeping with his former fiancée.”
“I talked to Reed before anything happened with me and Meredith.”
“And?”
“And it was a private conversation.” I took my car keys out of my pocket.
“I’m leaving.”
“Why can’t you see how impossible it would be for me to sit back and say
nothing after what happened with Kim?”
I sighed with exasperation. “Look, Meredith and I are quietly seeing each
other. Not in public, not in front of the boys. That’s all it is right now. I don’t
know what will come of it. No one’s getting engaged here, Mom. I’m looking
out for the boys’ best interests, but also seeing a woman I like a lot on the one
night a week I have available to see her.”
She nodded. “Just don’t try to spring her on me. Don’t bring her over here
for a family dinner. And for God’s sake, don’t bring her to Mason’s wedding.”
I walked to the front door, my anger simmering. Though I’d planned on
leaving without saying another word, I couldn’t help myself. I turned around to
face her.
“I can’t begin to tell you how disappointed I am in you. It’s been more than
eight years since she decided not to marry Reed, and you refuse to let that shit
die. He’s over it, and so is she. No one else has a right to hold a grudge about it.”
I left then, mildly disappointed in myself for letting her get to me, but mostly
glad I’d gotten that off my chest.
When I got home from work later that afternoon, the boys had neighborhood
friends over swimming. Meredith was sitting on a patio lounger, wearing giant
black sunglasses and reading a book.
“Hey,” she said when I walked outside. “I didn’t want to make them quit
playing to work on reading and writing, so we took a day off.”
“Good idea.” I sat down on the lounger next to her. “I can’t believe they
didn’t make you get in there with them.”
“Oh, they tried. But I don’t have a swimsuit with me.”
“All the better,” I said under my breath. “But I guess not while the kids are
here.”
She smiled and put her e-reader down on her chest. “So how many lives did
you save today?”
I shook my head. “None, I’m afraid. Just did a splenectomy. It was really
nasty, but it wouldn’t have been life-threatening for another few weeks.”
“I think it counts, then.” She slid her legs off the side of the lounger, and I
snuck a peek at them. Her sleeveless dress had a long skirt, but I caught some
skin.
“You’re leaving?” I asked her.
“Yep. I’m going back into the office to get some stuff done.”
“Blow it off and hang out here. Stay for dinner.”
She hesitated. “Are you sure?”
“Of course. How long will it take that lasagna you made to cook?”
“Is it thawed?”
I shook my head.
“At least an hour and a half.”
“I’ll grill burgers, then.”
“Dad, watch this!” Eric yelled from the pool.
He submerged his head under water and came bouncing back up, splashing
and smiling.
“Nicely done,” I said. I turned to Meredith. “I’m gonna start dinner.”
“How can I help?”
“I’ve got it. You just sit here and read. Maybe pull the skirt of your dress up
a little when you get back in the chair.”
She laughed, but I knew it was no coincidence that when I was grilling, the
slit in her skirt faced me and gave me a nice view all the way up to her lower
thigh.
I felt a new flare of anger over the argument with my mom this afternoon. I
would never tell Meredith how my mom felt about her. From comments she’d
made, I knew Meredith was aware of her reputation with others in Lovely. I
wished there was a way I could protect her from all that. None of those people
deserved to have the power to make her feel bad for even a single second.
The boys’ friends stayed for dinner, and as they ate, they all had the bronzed,
worn look of an entire day in the pool. As soon as they were finished, they
wanted to get back in the water.
They swam until sundown, and I gave them fifteen minutes with the pool
lights on before I made them get out. The neighbor kids rode their bikes home,
and Jordan and Eric changed into their pajamas, brushed their teeth, and didn’t
put up any fight over going to bed.
“You want a story?” I asked Eric.
“Maybe tomorrow,” he said, yawning.
That was rare. Swimming all day took it out of them. I tucked both boys in,
and when I got back downstairs, Meredith had finished loading the dishwasher
and was starting it.
When she turned back to the sink, I wrapped my arms around her from
behind. She put her hand on my arm and leaned back against me.
I stayed that way for a minute, just taking in the faint sweetness of the
perfume on her neck and the feel of her body against mine.
As I dipped my face down to kiss her neck, she stiffened.
“You okay?” I whispered.
“I just don’t want the kids to see us,” she whispered back.
 “There’s a creak at the top of the stairs. I’d hear them coming.”
I took her by the waist and turned her around to face me. Uncertainty swam
in her hazel eyes.
“What is it?” I asked her.
She hesitated. “I’m afraid they’ll think I’m trying to take Kim’s place. I
could never do that—I’d never want to do that, but in a child’s mind . . .”
“They don’t think that, Mer.”
“Not when I’m just hanging out with them or helping with homework. But if
they see us like this, that might change.”
I bent to rest my forehead against hers. “You’re overthinking this.”
“What if they notice the way I look at you?”
“Then they notice, but I don’t think it’ll happen.”
“They might not . . . like me anymore, though.”
My admiration for her grew as I realized she was genuinely worried about
this. She cared about Jordan and Eric.
I kissed her softly, but she was still stiff with tension.
“Creak in the stairs,” I whispered against her lips. “I promise. It’s
unmistakably loud.”
She relaxed and wrapped her arms around my neck.
“Am I the only one thinking about what we did in this kitchen last Friday
night?”
“No, I think about it at least a dozen times a day.”
“You’re a born spanker, Dr. Lockhart.”
I kissed her. “And you’re a born spankee. It’s like you were made to take it.”
“From you? Definitely.”
With a low groan, I kissed her a little harder. Soon she was pressed against
me, her fingers woven into my hair.
“I should go before this gets out of hand,” she said, easing herself away from
me.
“I guess.”
“I had fun tonight.”
“Me too.”
 She put a hand on my cheek and brushed her thumb across it. “I just want to
tell you that you’re a great dad.”
“Thanks. I try to be.”
“You are.”
“Do the kids ever say anything about Kim to you?”
She furrowed her brow in thought. “Not much. Eric and I were reading a
book about a mommy alligator one day, and he told me he doesn’t have a mom
anymore. That’s the only time I can remember either of them saying anything.”
“Damn. I hate that he thinks that.”
“I know. But you do everything possible to make them feel loved.”
I shook my head. “It’s not the same, though.”
“Do you wish she’d come back?”
“No.”
“Just keep doing what you’re doing. The boys both seem happy and well-
adjusted to me.”
“They both like you a lot.”
She smiled. “I like them, too. I think the best thing for them at this point is
that I be a friend—to all of you.”
“I agree.” I rested my forehead on hers again. “It means a lot to me that you
get that. That you know I can’t have a traditional relationship.”
“I’m just happy to have what I can get of you.”
She smiled and pulled away, picking up her bag from the counter.
“I’ll see you tomorrow.”
“Okay. Goodnight.”
I walked her out to her Jeep, but she got inside and put it in reverse before I
could kiss her. Not that I probably would have, anyway, with the neighbors
watching.
I shook my head as I walked back into the house. It was awkward as hell to
have to think about this stuff at thirty-seven years old.
Meredith
The boys were wearing me down by the day. After just thirty minutes of Eric
working on reading and Jordan working on writing, they’d convinced me to play
cards.
“Go fish,” I said, narrowing my eyes in mock seriousness.
Jordan pulled the card he needed from the pile on the table and did a little
dance to celebrate.
They’d been swimming again today while Stephanie babysat, and both of
them had a golden summer glow I envied.
“Hey, Meredith, what are you doing tonight?” Jordan asked me.
“When your dad gets here, I have to run back to work, actually. Our finance
guy had to leave early today, and I have to cover the end of his shift.”
“When is that over?”
“Seven.”
“My game starts at seven. Maybe you can come but just be a little late.”
His brown eyes, the same dark shade as his father’s, lit up hopefully.
I knew I shouldn’t go. It would be uncomfortable to show up there and have
not just the Lockharts, but others, staring at me and wondering about my ulterior
motives. Not that I had any, but the truth made for lousy gossip.
But I’d already put Jordan off a couple times, and I couldn’t do it again. I
wanted to watch him play.
“I’ll be there,” I said.
“You will?”
“Absolutely.”
“Cool.”
“I’ll be there, too,” Eric said, grinning. “Maybe we can play at the park
together.”
“She’ll be watching my game,” Jordan said, his brows knitted together.
 “Hey, guys,” Kyle called from the kitchen.
The boys mobbed him, both wanting to tell him about their day, and I told
Kyle I had to get back to work.
When I got there, Jeff Newberry was signing the paperwork for a new pickup
truck. He was a farmer who lived on the outskirts of Lovely.
“Heard you’re seeing the oldest Lockhart boy,” he said as he sat down in my
office to sign the paperwork for his vehicle.
“Did you?” I kept my face angled toward the papers I was signing, unwilling
to confirm or deny his statement.
“He’s a lucky guy. Can’t believe you haven’t been snatched up already.”
I smiled at him. Jeff’s two daughters had gone to high school the same time I
did, and he’d always been nice to me.
“Thank you,” I said, realizing it was the first time anyone had said something
nice about me seeing Kyle.
“Damn fine doctor, that boy. Julie had to get a biopsy last year, and he really
put our minds at rest over it. Got us in immediately and expedited the results.
You don’t get that kind of service in a big city.”
“That’s for sure.”
I passed him a small stack of papers to sign. “It’s quick and easy when
you’re paying cash. Just sign these, and we’ll get you on your way.”
He finished signing, and I made copies for him, putting them in an envelope
and walking him out to the salesman who’d sold him the car.
I was able to duck out then, and I drove to the ball fields. Jordan had told me
his game was on diamond three, and I saw the blue T-shirts his team wore in the
outfield when I pulled in.
My heart raced nervously. This was the kind of thing I deliberately avoided.
But it wasn’t about me, I reminded myself. This was for Jordan.
I spotted the Lockhart clan in a large group of lawn chairs near first base.
That meant I was able to sneak onto the bleachers without walking past them.
This wasn’t so bad at all. I had a great view of the game, and when it was
over, I’d be able to leave without encountering any of the Lockharts. From the
glance I’d gotten at their group, they were all here.
 My heart had resumed its normal pace when Jordan came up to bat in the
bottom of the third inning. He gave me a quick wave on his way to the plate, and
I waved back. I felt heads turning in my direction.
Ugh. I wanted to crawl under the bleachers. But I stayed focused on Jordan,
clapping when he hit a single.
His team didn’t score, and when they were running onto the field for the start
of the fourth inning, Eric slid onto the bleachers next to me.
“You want some popcorn?” he asked, holding a white paper bag out toward
me.
“No, thanks.”
“They’re gettin’ creamed,” he said, shoving a few pieces of popcorn into his
mouth.
A score of 4-2 was hardly that bad, but I just smiled at his assessment.
“Do you play ball, too?” I asked him.
“No, I’m on the swim team.”
“Maybe I can watch you swim sometime.”
“Yeah, you can come. I’m fast.”
“I know. You’re like a little fish I can never catch.”
He looked over at the gathering of lawn chairs. “Do you want to sit with my
dad? He’s over there.”
“Um . . . no, I think I’ll sit right here.”
“Okay. I’ll sit with you.”
Eric’s company was nice. It helped distract me from my constant awareness
of the Lockharts. Jordan’s team came back to take a 6-4 lead, with him scoring
one of the runs. I wanted to chicken out in the ninth inning and leave before the
game was over, but I made myself stay.
As soon as it was over, though, I got up from the bleachers and looked down
at Eric.
“See you tomorrow, okay?”
“Okay.”
“Tell Jordan I said good game.”
“I will.”
 He slid down from the bleachers, and as much as I didn’t want to look at the
Lockharts, I wanted to make sure he got back over to Kyle. When I saw Kyle, he
looked like he was having a disagreement with Grace. His jaw was set in a tense
line as she talked while he folded up a chair.
I just hoped it wasn’t about me.
Putting my head down, I hustled to my Jeep, barely able to keep from
breaking into a run. Seeing Grace Lockhart never failed to bring back the shame
I still carried over leaving Reed standing there waiting for a bride who would
never show up, nearly nine years ago.
I started my Jeep and was about to put it in drive when Kyle came running
up to my driver’s side door.
“Hey,” he said, his brow furrowed with confusion. “I didn’t know you were
coming.”
“It was a last-minute thing. Jordan asked me to come by after I finished at
work.”
“I’m sorry if you were uncomfortable.”
I shrugged. “No, it was fine.”
“It’s not fine.”
“It is what it is, Kyle.”
“What’s that supposed to mean?”
“I’m well aware what your mom thinks of me.”
The tight set of his lips told me I was right—their argument had been about
me.
“I don’t care what she thinks.”
I smiled sadly. “I wish I didn’t.”
“I had my niece Alana sleeping in my lap when Eric told me you were here.
Otherwise, I would have sat with you, too.”
“Don’t worry about it.” People were starting to walk toward their cars, and I
looked nervously at the exit. “Look, I need to go.”
He nodded. “I’m sorry, okay? I hate that you were uncomfortable.”
“It’s no big deal. I’ll see you tomorrow.”
He stepped back from my Jeep, and I pulled out of the parking lot, relieved
to have avoided seeing Grace face-to-face.
I’d figured that with the way rumors about me and were Kyle swirling, she’d
heard something was going on. But now I knew for sure. And I didn’t like the
anxious feeling it gave me. I had a feeling a confrontation would happen. It was
only a matter of when.
Kyle
Meredith’s brick bungalow had a shady yard full of mature trees, a swing on the
front porch, and baskets of flowers on either side of the front step.
When I knocked on the front door, she answered it wearing a red dress that
came to her knees, an apron covering the front of it. Her hair was pulled up, but
a few strands had escaped.
“Hey, I’m ready for you,” she said with a smile.
I knew she meant the dinner she’d made, but my thoughts were already in
the bedroom. I was beyond ready to be inside her and find out exactly what she
liked. Meredith’s combination of sexy and sweet had my self-control hanging by
a fine thread.
She’d made chicken parmesan, and it smelled amazing. I checked out her
living room on the way to the kitchen. She had a dark purple sofa with a blanket
folded neatly over the back and cream chairs flanking a brick fireplace mantle.
Bookcases were lined with books and a few photos, and there were several
houseplants.
Her place had the cozy touches mine was missing. I liked it.
“I brought white wine,” I said, setting it on the counter. “You have a
corkscrew?”
She handed me one, and I opened the wine while sneaking glances at her.
“How was work?” I asked her. “You ran out of my place so fast when I got
home, I didn’t get a chance to ask you.”
“I had to get home to make dinner,” she said, laughing lightly. “Work was
work. What about you?”
“It was a good day. One of those days where everything felt right.”
“I like that,” she said, meeting my eyes across the kitchen island.
“Or everything might have felt right because I knew I was seeing you
tonight.”
 She flushed slightly. “I’ve been looking forward to this all day. All week,
actually.”
“Me, too. I’ve been thinking . . . maybe we should slow down on the
physical stuff. Just some hand-holding and maybe a peck on the cheek at the end
of the night.”
Her brows flew up in surprise. “Oh . . . yeah, if that’s what you—”
“I’m kidding, Mer. Your face just then, though . . . that was great.”
I laughed, and she tossed a slice of red pepper from the salad at me. It
bounced off my chest, and I picked it up from the island and ate it.
“Peck on the cheek, my ass,” she muttered.
“You want me to peck your ass cheek? You know I’m all about that. Fuck
dinner, let’s get that dress off you.”
I came around to the other side of the island, picked her up, and set her on
the island counter, pushing her legs apart so I could stand between them. She
drew in a sharp breath as I ran my palm up her thigh and slid a fingertip beneath
her panties at the hip.
She wrapped her hands around my neck, toying with the hair at my nape.
“Kyle Lockhart, you may be the worst man in town for me to feel this way
about, but I can’t help myself.”
“How do you feel about me?” I ran my other hand under her cotton dress to
cup one of her breasts.
“Right now?” She bit her lower lip and smiled. “Hot and achy and very wet.”
With a low groan, I pinched her nipple and bent my face to her neck. I kissed
it as I slid my finger lower into her panties, unable to keep myself from finding
out just how wet she was.
Fuck. Really wet.
“I want you, Mer,” I said in her ear.
“I want you, too.”
I straightened and leaned back a little to meet her eyes.
“Can I ask you something without it killing the mood?”
“Sure.” She wrapped her legs around my waist.
“What did Reed call you when the two of you were alone?”
 She lowered her brows and considered. “Hmm . . . it’s been so long . . . I
guess he called me ‘babe’ on occasion. He wasn’t much for that kind of thing,
though.”
I worked her dress up her legs until I could see the skimpy black scrap of
silky fabric covering her pussy.
“Did he ever call you ‘Mer’?”
“No.”
“That’s just mine, then.” I dipped my face back to her neck, and she put a
hand on my chest to push me back.
“Kyle,” she said seriously. “There’s no part of me attached to Reed anymore.
That’s in the past. Everything about this thing between us is yours and mine. No
one else’s.”
“You don’t think you’ll compare the two of us in bed?”
Her eyes lit up, and she laughed. “God, no. I was a seventeen-year-old virgin
when Reed and I slept together for the first time. It was always sweet and good
between us, but now . . . Now I’m a twenty-nine-year-old woman who knows
what she wants. I know my body inside and out. I know sex can be fun and hot
and dirty. That’s what I want. I want a partner who will be daring with me.
Someone who cares about me but can also fuck the shit out of me. I’ve never
had both of those at the same time.”
“Me either. And I’m so fucking hard for you right now.”
She tightened her legs around my waist. “Let’s make a deal. Don’t worry
about me comparing you to Reed, and I won’t worry about you comparing me to
Kim. I’ll make sure I’m the only woman on your mind when we’re in bed.”
My blood was pumping hard and fast. Sex for nothing but straight-up
satisfaction. I’d never had that in my life. There was no price to be paid with
Meredith.
“Lean back on your hands,” I said.
As soon as she did, I eased her hips into the air and took hold of her panties,
pulling them down until they were around her ankles. I bent down and put her
feet on my shoulders, her panties at the back of my neck.
And then I looked at her for nothing but my own gratification. Fuck, she was
the sexiest woman I’d ever seen. Her pussy was shaved bare, and moisture
glistened on it as I pushed back her thighs to get a view inside her.
“You want me in there, don’t you?” I met her eyes and ran my thumb up the
length of her slit to her clit, which I circled.
“Oh, shit.” She moaned and arched her back. “Yes.”
“I don’t know if I can,” I said, shaking my head.
“What?” Her mouth dropped open in disbelief.
I smiled. “It’s just too hard. There are so many places I want to come on you,
and I can’t decide where to start. Should I pull my dick out when I’m done and
come on your sore, well-fucked pussy? Or should I cream all over those perfect
tits?”
“Oh, Jesus.” She was circling her hips now, trying to get more friction from
my finger on her clit.
“Maybe I should take you from behind and pull out and come all over that
luscious ass. All over the red marks I’m going to leave when I spank you.”
“Fuck me,” she said, meeting my eyes. The desperate moan in her voice
made my cock swell.
“Oh, I’m going to. But first I need to decide where to come. You see my
dilemma?”
I turned my face to her leg and kissed her thigh, easing my thumb away from
her clit.
“Kyle, please.” Her breathy tone filled me with certainty.
Nothing had ever felt so right. With her, I could do and say the dirty things
I’d never spoken aloud to a woman. It was my wildest dream come true.
I moved one hand to her breast, squeezing it as I ran the other hand down the
length of her leg. I held her foot beneath its black high heel and kissed her ankle.
“Harder,” she said, her tone nearly a whimper. “Squeeze harder.”
I jerked down her bra and squeezed her bare breast in my hand, pinching the
nipple between my thumb and forefinger. The harder I pinched, the louder she
moaned.
I took off her shoe and dropped it and her panties to the floor. Then I put my
hands on her inner thighs and spread her legs wide open.
 As I lowered my face to her thighs, Meredith took a handful of my hair and
pulled hard.
“Yes,” she cried. “Do it, please. I’m so close.”
I met her eyes and smiled innocently. “You want me to suck on your clit until
you come in my mouth?”
“Yes.” She was breathing hard. “I’m so close.”
“Did I ever tell you I considered becoming an OB before I decided to
specialize in surgery?”
“What?” Her expression was confused and desperate.
“Yeah.” I kept my hands on her thighs. “Lovely needed an OB and a
surgeon. So I was taking the OB/GYN classes thinking I’d specialize in that.
And I paid very close attention.”
I lightly blew air on her spread pussy, and she shivered and moaned.
“Did you know that the longer a woman stays in an aroused state before
orgasm, the harder that orgasm will be when she reaches it?” I asked.
“I . . . don’t . . . yes. Oh God, Kyle, I’m so wet right now.”
I kissed her inner thighs, seeing that she was too close to the edge for me to
go near her pussy right now. I’d waited so long for this; I wasn’t about to let it
end quickly.
“So where am I gonna come, Mer?” I said in a low voice against her skin.
“I’ll be wearing a condom, so let’s think about this . . . Should I pull it off at the
end and come on your sweet, soft skin?”
“Yes.” She was rocking her hips again. “On my belly. I want you to pull it
off and come on my belly.”
The thought made me groan and stroke my hand over my erection. “Yeah, I
like that idea.”
“Please fuck me, Kyle. I need you inside me so badly.”
I stepped back from the island and picked her up, carrying her over-the-
threshold style.
She grabbed my face with both hands, kissing me hard as I walked her
through the living room.
“On the right,” she said. “Second door on the right.”
 I went through the open door, not even looking at the bedroom. I just found
the bed and gently tossed her onto it.
She frantically worked her dress over her head, practically ripping her bra off
right after. Seeing her this way had me so fucking hard.
It took all my self-control to undress slowly, my eyes never leaving hers. She
was on her back, her legs spread wide, her eyes pleading with me to hurry.
I’d put condoms in my jeans pocket, and I pulled one out as I slid my jeans
off. I made her watch me stroke myself through the fabric of my boxer briefs for
a full minute before I took them off.
“I want you so fucking much it hurts, Mer,” I said as I ripped open the
condom. “You couldn’t be more perfect.”
I slid the condom over my cock, and she watched me with a deep hunger in
her gaze.
When I got to my knees on the bed between her legs, I couldn’t wait another
second. I put the head of my cock between the wet lips of her pussy and slid it
inside, groaning loudly as her tight warmth encased me.
“Oh, shit,” she cried. “You feel so good.”
I slowed down on the last couple inches, but she still winced. When I pulled
back and gave it all to her again, she relaxed and took it.
We immediately found a rhythm, and she wrapped her legs around my waist.
I groaned with every thrust because it was just too fucking good. My mouth
found hers, and we kissed and bit at each other’s lips, neither of us feeling any
pain.
My balls tightened as I pumped into her, my whole body on the edge of
release. She was grinding her hips against mine, and every sensation was
heaven.
We were nothing but two sweaty bodies grunting and grinding as we climbed
higher. When she cried out loudly and arched her body against mine, the feel of
her pussy clenching around me as she came made me start coming. I quickly
ripped off the condom and tossed it to the side so I could come on her belly like
she wanted.
I came so hard I was dizzy for a second. Then I put my hands on either side
of her head and bent over her, breathing hard.
“That was like a dream,” she murmured. “It was incredible.”
“Yeah.” I rolled onto my back. “Fuck.”
“You okay?” She sat up and looked down at me with concern.
“I’m perfect,” I said, reaching up to brush the hair away from her face. “I just
didn’t know it could be like that.”
She smiled in that rare, wide way I only got to see when she felt completely
confident and at ease.
“Get down here and kiss me,” I said.
She bent her face to mine, and I kissed her swollen lips more tenderly than I
had during sex.
“I have to go clean up,” she said against my mouth. “Want me to bring you a
plate of dinner?”
“You clean up, and I’ll get the plates of dinner.”
“Okay. There’s a bottle of champagne in the fridge. I was hoping we’d have
something to celebrate tonight, and we do.”
“I’ve been waiting my whole life for sex like that,” I said, cupping her cheek
in my hand. “You know that, right?”
“Yes. So have I, Kyle.”
We left the bed, and I realized as I made our plates that I shouldn’t lament
not having the best sex of my life until age thirty-seven. All those years before
now had given me more appreciation for tonight than I otherwise would’ve had.
Not that there wasn’t lots of lost time to make up for. And I planned to do as
much of that as Meredith was game for.
Meredith
Kyle left late Saturday morning to get the boys from his parents’ house. I’d been
neglecting my house, so I spent the day cleaning. We’d had so much sex the
night before that I was physically sore, but emotionally, I felt the opposite. Kyle
had healed the part of me that felt too broken and flawed to attract an amazing
man like him.
Sunday morning, he and the boys picked me up before sunrise, and we went
fishing at a lake an hour away from Lovely. It was remote and we were alone,
with no worries about prying eyes or wagging tongues.
I caught two fish, but mostly I just liked watching the boys fish. They baited
their hooks and tossed out their lines in the same careful, methodical way their
father did.
It was a great day, though my worry about losing these three from my life
was stronger when I got home. They were right for me in every way, but I was
only right for them when it was just the four of us. I’d never be a part of their
extended family, and family was everything to the Lockharts.
I tried not to let the worry creep up and darken my happiness. When I’d
gotten the test results on my biopsy last month, I’d vowed to find joy in my life.
I’d found it, and I didn’t want to let thoughts of past mistakes steal my present.
On Monday, the boys and I made spaghetti for dinner while Kyle met up
with his brothers for dinner at a local bar and tap so they could finalize plans for
Mason’s bachelor party.
Tuesday, I was worried about my dad again when I got over to Kyle’s place
after work. Stephanie was buried in her phone in the living room while the boys
swam out back, and I came close to making a comment about her not watching
them.
That wasn’t my place, though. I also couldn’t be sure it wasn’t my
aggravation with walking in on my dad eating a giant cheeseburger in his office
for lunch that was making me more irritated than usual. He’d smiled sheepishly
as mayo and cheese dripped onto the foil wrapper.
If he didn’t value his own life, I couldn’t force it on him. But it made me
angry all the same.
I was pensive when Kyle got home from work that evening, not even making
eye contact with him.
“How’s it going?” he asked.
“Good.”
He held up a small brown paper sack. “One of my patients brought me some
vegetables from her garden. Thought we could make grilled chicken salads for
dinner.”
“Actually, I think I’m going to take a long run.” I pushed away from the
kitchen counter I’d been leaning against.
“Hey, what’s wrong?”
I shrugged. “I’m just in a mood over my dad. He won’t follow the diet and
exercise plan he’s supposed to be doing. He just doesn’t care. And he and my
sister are all the family I have left in this world.”
Kyle sighed and approached me, putting his hands on my shoulders. “I’m
sorry.”
“I’m tired of fighting him on it.”
“Does he know how you feel about this?”
I looked up into his eyes. “He knows. I’m on him about it constantly.”
He slid his hands back a little and rubbed my shoulders, then glanced at the
empty living room. “Where are the boys?”
“In Jordan’s room. Their friends are over, and they made a giant tent in
there.”
Kyle smiled. “I used to make those with my brothers.”
“On rainy days, my mom would put a blanket over our kitchen table to make
it a tent, and we’d read books in there with flashlights.”
At the sound of footsteps pounding down the stairs, Kyle took his hands off
my shoulders.
“Meredith,” Eric called as he ran into the room, “can you get me some tape?”
 “There’s some on the desk in my office,” Kyle said.
Eric ran off, leaving us alone again.
“If you want to run, that’s cool,” Kyle said to me. “But if you want to stay
and talk about it, I’m here.”
“I just wish there was an answer.” I stared out the kitchen windows at the
glistening pool water. “Shouldn’t bypass surgery be the ultimate wake-up call?”
He walked over and stood next to me, putting an arm around my shoulders. I
leaned against his chest, finding comfort in the faint smell of his soap.
“I’ll stay for dinner,” I said, sighing. “As long as you don’t mind my crummy
mood.”
“Everyone’s entitled sometimes, Mer.” He kissed the top of my head. “I need
to run Jordan to ball practice in a few minutes, and we can start dinner when I
get back.”
“I’ll start it now. Cooking is therapeutic for me.”
“Before you break out the food, can I just tell you I removed a large, pus-
filled nodule from a patient’s ass today?”
I cringed. “Eww.”
“Yeah. It was kinda awesome, though.”
He walked through the living room and called up to Jordan to be ready to
leave for practice in five minutes.
“And another patient came on to me at the office,” he said as he walked back
into the kitchen. “It was quite a day.”
“What? Someone came on to you?”
He grinned playfully. “Do I hear a note of possession?”
“Possibly.”
“Yeah, a woman asked me during her appointment if I wanted to get a drink
sometime.”
This was bothering me more than it probably should have. “Did she have her
clothes off?”
“No. But I made a note in her file that I won’t see her alone again. One of my
nurses will have to sit in.”
“What did you tell her?”
 “I politely declined.”
I got out a knife and cutting board to chop vegetables and set to work,
washing peppers, cucumbers, and tomatoes and then chopping them into neat,
uniform pieces.
Kyle left with Jordan, and I got the chicken ready for the grill. He cooked it
when he got back, and we ate dinner on the deck with Eric. It was nice, having a
distraction from my worries about my dad.
Eric was reading me Harry Potter when Kyle got back from picking Jordan
up from practice. It was getting dark, and I was putting my shoes on to leave
when Kyle’s phone sounded with the loud, on-call ringtone. He answered it and
said he’d be right there.
“Can you stay?” he asked me. “I can send Mason over to get the boys if I
need to.”
“No, I can stay.”
“You sure? I may be a while.”
“Of course. Go.”
He grabbed his keys and took off. I took Hagrid outside while the boys
brushed their teeth and then got in bed with Eric while he kept reading to me.
We fell asleep that way, and when I woke up and snuck out of bed later, I
found Hagrid curled up at the end of Jordan’s bed.
When I got downstairs, I saw that it was almost two thirty a.m. I got a drink
of water, curled up on the leather sofa, and went back to sleep.
The sound of the door opening woke me up again, and I got up and walked
into the kitchen. The clock on the stove said it was now 3:20 a.m.
“Hey,” I said, my voice groggy.
“Hey.”
Kyle sounded defeated, which was unlike him. In the glow of the single light
I’d left on above the sink, I saw dark circles under his eyes. He had to be
exhausted.
He came to me and wrapped his arms around my back, holding me tight
against him. This embrace was different; he needed something out of it, and I
hoped I could give it to him.
 “You okay?” I asked, looking up at him.
“I don’t know,” he murmured.
“You’re scaring me. What happened?”
He released me and leaned back against the kitchen island, folding his arms
over his chest.
“This was one of the worst nights I’ve ever experienced.”
His forlorn tone made my heart ache. “I’m so sorry.”
“You know Russ and Laura Golden’s daughter?”
“The older one or the younger one?”
“The younger one, Madison. She’s fifteen.”
“Yeah, I do. Did something happen to her?”
He sighed heavily and his shoulders dropped. “She was raped in a wooded
area of the park. It was . . .” He shook his head. “ . . . I’ve never seen anything
like it, Mer. I don’t know how someone could do something as brutal as what
that guy did to her. She’s ruined inside. I don’t think she’ll ever be able to have
children. And she bit down on the guy’s tongue to try to stop him during the
assault, and she was covered in his blood . . .”
I covered my mouth with my hand, unshed tears feeling heavy in my eyes.
The pain in Kyle’s voice and the thought of what had happened to Madison
Golden was almost too much.
Words didn’t seem like enough, so I reached out and squeezed his hand
instead.
“I couldn’t fix her.” His voice broke with emotion. “It was all I could do to
keep her alive. I had to send her by chopper to St. Louis to see specialists at a
trauma center. And I just sat there, by that radio . . . praying she’d make it there.”
He shook his head and wiped the corners of his eyes.
“She made it,” he said, his voice thick and hoarse. “She’s a fighter. I talked
to someone from the trauma team in St. Louis before I left, and they said she’s
critical but stable.”
“My God,” I whispered. “I don’t even . . . that poor, sweet girl.”
He sniffed and took a deep breath. “Yeah, and about an hour after I got her
into the chopper, a guy comes into the ER with his tongue nearly bitten off. Tells
us he fell and did it to himself.”
I stepped back, horrified. “No.”
“I wanted to let that motherfucker choke to death on his own blood,” Kyle
said in a low tone. “I wanted to chop his tongue the rest of the way off and shove
it down his throat.”
I squeezed his hand and closed my eyes. I’d been here sleeping obliviously
while he was experiencing something I already knew would haunt him. Just
seeing him like this would haunt me.
“They prepped him for surgery, and I stood there for a full minute
beforehand, just looking at him and asking myself if I could do it,” he said,
shaking his head. “I’m a physician. I took an oath, and I abide by it every day.
But for the first time . . . I didn’t want to make someone better. He deserved to
die for what he did to her.”
I put my hands on his upper arms, and he rested his forehead on mine.
“I did the surgery,” he whispered. “I sewed that miserable son of a bitch’s
tongue back on.”
“You had no choice,” I said, reaching up to cup his cheek in my palm.
“I had a choice.”
“You didn’t, Kyle. He’ll get his—I know that. But it wasn’t for you to
decide.”
“Whatever he gets won’t compare to the hell she’ll have to live through.”
“You’re right.”
He wrapped his arms around me again, holding me close to him.
“I can’t stop seeing it,” he said softly. “I’ve never had trouble leaving work
at work like this.”
“Is there anything I can do?”
“I don’t know. Don’t leave. I need you here.”
“I’m here,” I said, tipping my face up to kiss him gently.
He closed his eyes. “I’m so fucking overwhelmed by the ugliness of it all.”
I stepped back from him and led him by the hand into the living room. I
didn’t have the words to comfort him, but I had something just as powerful.
“Sit,” I said.
 He sat down on the couch and looked up at me. I was wearing the short-
sleeved pink blouse and black skirt I’d worn to work Tuesday, now rumpled
from sleep. I unbuttoned the shirt and let it fall to the floor, then unzipped my
skirt, slid it down my legs and stepped out of it.
I pulled a brown plush blanket from the side of the couch and set it next to
Kyle.
“If the stairs creak, cover me up,” I whispered.
He nodded, his breathing ragged. I took off my bra and panties, and once I
was naked before him, reached for the ties on the pants of his scrubs.
He helped me slide the pants and his boxer briefs down. I cupped his cheek
in my palm.
“I’m on the pill, and I don’t have any STDs. I’ve been tested. Are you good,
too?”
“Yeah. I got tested after Kim left.”
I straddled his lap and looked down at him. “Is this okay?”
“More than okay.”
He spread the blanket out and wrapped it around my back. I held it closed
behind his neck and sank down onto his erection.
“Ah . . . fuck,” he whispered.
I rode him slowly at first. His hands closed around my hips, and soon he was
setting a faster pace, grinding his hips up to mine.
Our heavy breathing and the slamming together of our bodies were the only
sounds in the room. Kyle took one of my nipples into his mouth and licked it
gently, a contrast to the rough sex we were having right now.
It was so good. Only one thing mattered right now. Everything else had been
cleared away as we chased the release building deep inside both of us.
“Shit . . . Mer.” Kyle whispered against my mouth, his breath hot on my lips.
“I’m gonna come, baby. I need you to come.”
I would have done anything for him in that moment. The frantic need in his
voice pushed me over the edge, and I panted as I came hard, digging my nails
into his shoulders and fighting not to cry out.
He pulled my hips down against him one last time, and I felt his release
inside me. I went limp against his chest.
“Thank you,” he whispered in my ear.
I sat back just enough to see his face in the moonlight. “You never have to
thank me for sex, Kyle. I want it just as much as you do.”
“I don’t mean thanks for the sex so much as . . . thanks for knowing what I
needed. For helping me get some of the pain out.”
“Of course. My heart hurts for that girl and her family.”
His brow was furrowed with worry. “Mine too. Things like this just don’t
happen in Lovely.”
“She has a long road ahead of her. I’ll be praying for her.”
“That’s a good idea.” He ran a hand over my thigh. “And hey, I don’t
normally disclose details about my patients or who they are. That has to stay
between us.”
“I understand. I promise it’s safe with me.”
He cringed. “This will be the talk of Lovely within a few hours. Everyone
wants to know the details, but they don’t realize that knowing them isn’t all that
easy.”
“I admire you. I already did, in so many ways, but . . . thank you for being
there to put people back together when they’re hurt.”
“People in the medical field need someone to be open with. We usually can
trust our partners with this stuff, but . . . I’ve never had that until now.”
“Not with Kim?”
He shook his head. “She would have repeated stuff.”
I nodded.
“What are you smiling about, Mer?”
I shook my head and looked away.
“What? Tell me.”
“I’m just being a girl. It made me feel good that you called me your partner.”
“You’ve become that in my heart. I’m sorry it’s so fucked up because of my
mother.”
“No, it’s my own fault.”
He put his thumb on my chin and turned my face so we were eye to eye.
“Nothing is your fault. None of this. This isn’t because you didn’t marry Reed,
it’s because my mother carries a grudge over it. Tell me you understand that.”
“I do . . .”
“No. There’s doubt in your tone. Tell me you get that the problem is her and
not you.”
“The problem is . . . her and not me,” I said, the words feeling foreign.
“We’ll figure it out. I’ve got no problem telling her to deal with it. It’s mostly
the boys I worry about.”
“I know. I’m not trying to rush things.”
He cupped my cheeks and pulled me close for a kiss. “I want you to stay
here. Go sleep in my bed, and I’ll take the couch. Find some of my clothes to
sleep in.”
“You’ve been up all night. You take your bed, and I’ll take the couch.”
“No. Go.”
I got off his lap and realized the first thing I needed to do was clean myself
up. Picking up my clothes from the floor, I kept the blanket wrapped around me
and headed for Kyle’s bedroom.
He followed me in to clean up and get fresh clothes for himself. I felt bad for
taking his huge, comfortable bed, but when he looked at me from the doorway
and I saw his expression in the moonlight, I didn’t feel bad anymore. I felt
cherished.
Kyle
The news about Madison Golden left Lovely collectively shocked. It was like a
hush fell over the town as everyone processed what had happened. Patients told
me they were hugging their children closer now and struggling to find a way to
tell them about the robbery of Madison’s innocence.
I’d gone through that myself when Kim left—trying to find the balance
between being honest with my boys and not disparaging their mother. I was
reminded of the conversations we’d had over it when Jordan turned to me
Thursday morning over breakfast.
“Do you like Meredith?” he asked me.
I’d had a spoonful of oatmeal halfway to my mouth, and I set it back down in
my bowl.
“Of course, I like her.”
His eyes widened with exasperation. “You know what I mean, Dad. Do you
like her, like her? The way you used to like Mom?”
I blew out a breath, trying to think fast. The easy way out would be to put
him off. I could talk my way around this. I’d tried that at first when Kim left.
But dishonesty had many forms, and I’d ended up feeling like my sons
needed me to be the one person in the world who would always be straight with
them, even on tough subjects.
“I do like her, yes.”
Jordan nodded. “Does Mom know about her?”
“No. I haven’t talked to your mom in almost a year. If I did, I’d tell you
guys.”
“So you still don’t know where she is?”
“No.”
The disappointment in his eyes tore at me. I hated that my kids’ new reality
was having a mother who didn’t seem to give a shit about them.
 “Do you love Meredith?” Jordan asked.
“I’d say I really like her a lot at this point. It takes time to know if you’re
truly in love with someone.”
He went back to his oatmeal, but I could see the wheels still turning in his
mind.
“How do you feel about me liking Meredith?” I asked him.
He shrugged. “It’s cool, I guess. She’s nice. And pretty.”
“I want you guys to know I’d never like a woman who didn’t like you and
want to spend time with you. It’s not just me, it’s the three of us.”
“I like her,” Eric offered.
“Good.”
“Does she ever . . . drink alcohol?” Jordan asked.
His brows were knitted together with concern in a way no kid’s ever should
be. It crushed me.
“She has a glass of wine with dinner sometimes, but that’s all.”
“I wish she wouldn’t drink at all.”
I nodded. “What’s hard about alcohol is that most people can just have a
drink once in a while, but some become addicted, like your mom did.”
“So Meredith could get addicted, too?”
“It’s very unlikely. I don’t want you to worry about that.”
“Are you and Meredith getting married?”
“It’s way too soon to be thinking about anything like that,” I said. “We just
like being together, and so we’re seeing where that takes us.”
“I can tell you like her by the way you look at her.”
I smiled. “You’re perceptive, kid.”
“What’s perceptive?” Eric asked.
“It means someone who can figure things out.”
“Maybe you should kiss her,” Eric said, giggling as he said it.
“That’s a good idea.”
The doorbell rang then, and I said a silent thank you to Stephanie for being a
little early to babysit today.
I cleared away the breakfast dishes and said good-bye to everyone. I’d told
Stephanie to make sure the doors were locked at all times and to keep her eyes
on the boys when they were outside. Seeing the evil in the world firsthand had
made me more vigilant about my own children’s safety.
My surgery schedule had me at the hospital all day today. The morning
passed quickly because the surgical teams had to be efficient with so many
procedures scheduled.
I was heading to the hospital cafeteria for lunch when I pulled my cell phone
from my pocket to check it and saw several texts from Meredith.
Meredith: I’m worried about my dad. He started having chest pains in
the middle of a meeting this morning.
Meredith: I’m taking him to the hospital.
Meredith: We’re here. They took him back for tests, and I’m just
waiting.
She’d been trying to reach me for a couple hours, and I hated that I’d missed
those messages. I stopped walking and turned around, taking the elevator down
to the emergency room.
The ER receptionist told me which room they were in, and I went to it,
rapping lightly on the wall before pulling aside the curtain.
“Hey,” Meredith said, smiling through tears.
She was sitting on the edge of the hospital bed, holding her father’s hand.
When she stood, it didn’t matter to either of us that we were trying to keep things
on the down low. I went to her with open arms, and she sank against me,
pressing her cheek to my chest.
“I’m fine,” her dad said, shaking his head. “There’s no need to cry, Merry.”
“Who’s your doctor?” I asked him. “In here, I mean.”
“Some young kid. I don’t remember his name.”
“Cartwright?”
Meredith nodded. “Yeah, that’s his name.”
I rubbed my palm over her back. “What’s he said so far?”
“He’s got him hooked up to these machines, and he said so far it doesn’t look
like another heart attack. But he wants to keep monitoring him to be sure.”
“Okay, that’s good.”
“I see you didn’t listen to me about seeing him,” her father said, giving her a
pointed look.
“Dad, now is not the time.”
He looked at me. “How does your mother treat my daughter, Dr. Lockhart?
Do you insist that she respect her?”
Sam Hobbs had gotten agitated quickly. The waves on the paper readout of
the electrocardiogram machine started getting bigger.
“Mr. Hobbs, please stay calm,” I said in a steady tone. “You need to take it
easy until all the tests are complete.”
“Just answer me,” he said insistently.
“Dad, don’t.” Meredith lifted her head from my chest. “Listen to him. We’re
here because you were having severe chest pains. Now is not the time.”
“She’s too good for you,” he said, dropping his head back against the
inclined back of the bed. “Any man who won’t stand up for her will never have
my blessing.”
His words hit me hard. He was right. I’d been taking everything I needed
from Meredith, while not giving her everything she needed in return.
“What can I do for you?” I asked her.
She sighed heavily. “I’m okay. Just really anxious to find out for sure that
he’s okay.”
“Why don’t I go see what I can find out from Cartwright?”
She nodded. “That would be good.”
I squeezed her hand and left the small exam room in search of Lovely
Hospital’s newest ER doc. I’d only met him once at a meeting.
I caught him leaving another patient’s room.
“Hey, Jonathan,” I said.
“Dr. Lockhart, hey.”
“Kyle.”
He smiled. “Kyle. What’s up?”
“Sam Hobbs, your patient in room four, is . . . a friend of mine. Just wanted
to check on him.”
“Oh, sure. It looks like either indigestion or anxiety. No signs of a heart
attack. I’m keeping him on an ECG for a little while longer just due to his
history.”
“Okay, good. So he’ll be discharged.”
“Yep. With a stern warning about having bacon, sausage, ham, and eggs for
breakfast.”
“Are you shitting me?”
“That’s what he told the nurse he had for breakfast at the diner this morning.
That’d give anyone heartburn.”
I shook my head. “Damn. Okay. Thanks, man.”
“Sure.”
When I got back to the exam room, Meredith was back at her father’s
bedside, holding his hand.
I pulled aside the curtain and said, “Can you come out here for a sec, Mer?”
“Sure.” She wiped her cheeks and stood up.
Her eyes were red-rimmed and filled with worry when she met me in the
hallway. “Is everything okay?”
“Yeah. Everything’s good. Why don’t you go down to the cafeteria and grab
some lunch?”
“Oh, I couldn’t eat right now.”
“Just try.”
“I don’t want to leave him alone.”
I rubbed her shoulders. “He won’t be alone. I’ll be with him.”
“I don’t think that’s a good—”
“Just trust me. Please?”
She furrowed her brow with uncertainty. “Okay. I’ll just grab my purse.”
I followed her into the exam room, and she told her dad she’d be right back.
“Grab me a cheeseburger, will ya?” he cracked.
Meredith winced at his remark, bowed her head, and left the room.
I pulled a chair up to the side of Sam’s bed and sat down.
“I’ve got nothing to say to you,” he said.
 “Well, I’ve got plenty to say to you. And you’re gonna listen to me.”
He scoffed. “You’ve got a lot of nerve. I guess all you Lockharts do,
though.”
“I care about Meredith very much.”
“You got a damn fine way of showing—”
I cut him off. “Stop talking and listen to me, will you?”
He glared at me, his lips pressed together in a tight line.
“Meredith is very important to me,” I said. “I didn’t set out to develop
feelings for my brother’s former fiancée, and she didn’t set out to develop
feelings for Reed’s brother. But here we are. And she’s amazing and my boys are
crazy about her. I just want to say . . . about what you said before . . . you’re
right.”
“About you not being good enough for her?”
“Yeah . . . up to now, anyway. And about my mom. I’ve tried to straddle the
fence on this point by telling her it was none of her business. But you’re right—
Meredith deserves for me to stand up for her. And I will.”
He gave me a skeptical look. “You will?”
“I promise you I will . . . if you do something for me.”
He arched his brows as if telling me he was listening.
“You’re the only family Meredith and Lena have,” I said. “Meredith is
fiercely devoted to you. And it’s not fair for her to watch you slowly killing
yourself by ignoring the diet you’re supposed to be on. It hurts her. And that
hurts me. It should hurt you, too.”
His expression dropped from anger into shame.
“She sacrifices for you,” I continued. “She gave up the career she wanted
because she’s got your back at the dealership. You need to show her she’s worth
sacrificing for, too.”
“I’d never deliberately hurt her,” he said softly.
“I know that. And she probably hasn’t told you how much it hurts her,
because she holds everything inside. She’s had to do that for a long time. But
when I saw her face when I walked into this room, those tears hurt me, and they
ought to hurt you, too.”
 Sam sighed heavily. “I hear you.”
“I want you and me to get along. Not just for show. I want us to genuinely
like each other. Meredith has too few people in her life for it to be any other way.
So tell me—what do I need to do to make that happen?”
After a few seconds of silence, he smiled. “If you make her happy and stand
up for her to anyone and everyone, including that mother of yours, that’s all I
ask.”
I held out my hand to him. “Deal.”
He shook my hand and met my eyes. “We’re friends now, then. So the next
time you need a vehicle of any kind, you come see me. I’ll set you up.”
“I’ll do that.”
“Can you go ask your doctor friend when I can get out of here?”
“It’ll be a couple more hours. Might as well get comfortable.”
He grunted gruffly. “Damn hospitals. I hate ’em.”
“Let’s keep you from needing to come back, then.”
“I suppose you need to go pass out some aspirins you’ll charge patients
eighty bucks for or something.”
I smiled at that. “Actually, no. I’m not due back downstairs for another half
hour. I think I’ll hang out here with you.”
He shrugged like he didn’t care what I did. I knew better, though.
Meredith
My dad seemed different on the drive back to the dealership from the hospital
later that afternoon. He was quiet.
“Are you okay?” I asked him.
“I’m good, yeah. I was just thinking . . . Did I ever tell you how much I
appreciated you coming to work for me?”
I snuck a glance at him. Something was definitely up. “No. But you don’t
need to. We’re family, Dad. I like working for you.”
“Not as much as you would have liked teaching.”
I shrugged. “Who knows? I’m happy with my job, though, so please don’t
worry about it.”
“I’ve taken you for granted. You’re a good daughter, Merry. And I may have
overreacted about Kyle before.”
“I know you’d like him if you got to know him.”
“I’d like to do that.”
I smiled at him. “Really?”
“How about a cookout at my place this weekend? We can make one of those
fish recipes they gave me at the hospital with my diet plan.”
My eyes warmed with a rush of tears, but I forced them back. “I’d love that,
Dad.”
I pulled into the parking lot, and when we were both out of my Jeep, he
hugged me.
“You go home and get some rest,” he said. “And I want you to take
tomorrow off.”
“Really?”
He nodded. “Go do something for yourself. And let me know when you want
to have that cookout.”
He went into the dealership, and I got back in my Jeep. I did feel exhausted.
Kyle had told me he was having Stephanie stay with the boys until he got home
from work, so I drove home.
I considered painting a bookshelf I’d been wanting to get to for months, but I
decided on guilty pleasures instead. I ate ice cream for dinner and binge-watched
Netflix until I fell asleep on the couch.
When the sound of an incoming text woke me up, it was dark other than the
glow of the TV screen. There was a spoon on my chest and an empty ice cream
container on the floor.
I had to squint to make out the message on my phone.
Kyle: Just checking on you.
Me: I’m good. Just being lazy.
Kyle: Glad to hear it. And hey . . . I need a favor.
Me: What?
Kyle: Tell me one of your fantasies. Something doable, so not a
gangbang or anything . . .
I laughed out loud at that.
Me: Don’t worry, a gangbang isn’t a fantasy of mine.

Kyle: Really fucking glad to hear that.

Me: This is easy. You in scrubs. Playing doctor with me.
Kyle: Role play, huh?
Me: You look really hot in scrubs, Dr. Lockhart.
Kyle: Okay, done.
Me: Done?
Kyle: Tomorrow night at my place. My parents are taking the kids to St.
Louis for the night, and they’re leaving at 3. Can you be here at 6?
Me: Yes. What should I bring?
 Kyle: Just you.
Me: Okay. See you then.
Kyle: Looking forward to it.
I went back to sleep on the couch, not even bothering to take the spoon off
my chest, and slept until seven the next morning. After I got up, I went for a run,
showered, and went to the nail salon for a mani/pedi. Then I got a blowout at the
hair salon and went shopping for sexy shoes and lingerie.
It was early afternoon when I finished, and I had to force myself not to go
into work. Instead, I took a wreath of fresh flowers to my mother’s grave and sat
there for a while. She would have liked Kyle and been happy for me. It was nice
just to sit near her marker and think about that.
After that, I read for a few hours, only looking at the clock every ten minutes
or so. I was dying to go to Kyle’s.
At 5:40, I couldn’t wait any longer. I picked up the overnight bag I’d packed,
set it in the back of my Jeep, and headed for his place.
I’d spent so many years feeling like I didn’t deserve a man like Kyle that this
still felt a little surreal to me. But with every day that passed, it sank in that this
was really happening.
My heart felt fluttery as I waited on his doorstep. Not just over my fantasy,
but over having a tall, dark, and sexy man who wanted to make my fantasy a
reality.
Kyle opened the door, and his easy smile spread across his face. “Hey. Get in
here.”
I walked inside, figuring I’d at least get a kiss, but nothing. Instead, he led
the way into the kitchen.
“I’m ready for you,” he said.
“I see.” I took in his light blue surgical scrubs, biting my lower lip with
excitement.
He glanced down at his scrubs and then back up at me. “I’ve got more in
mind than just this, Miss Hobbs.”
 A swirl of arousal formed low in my belly. “Oh, you do?”
“Oh, I do.” He approached me, and when we were just a few steps apart, he
gave me a serious look. “The fantasy begins when we get to the bottom of the
basement stairs, got it? It’s all doctor/patient from then on.”
I nodded and breathed out slowly, the sweet anticipation nearly killing me.
“Have you ever had a doctor/patient fantasy?”
“No, but I’m very into doing this with you.”
“Me too,” I said, a hint of begging in my tone.
“Let’s wait ten more minutes.”
My eyes widened with disbelief and he laughed, then took my hand and led
me to the basement stairs.
“You’re mean,” I murmured.
He turned to me when we were halfway down the stairs. “Before we get
there, just so you don’t think I went overboard, I got this stuff when the hospital
built its new clinic. So I already had it.”
“What stuff?”
He let go of my hand and walked to the bottom of the stairs. When I got
there, I followed him through the huge, finished family room to a door of a room
I’d never been in.
My heart was pounding now. When he opened the door and flipped the light
switch on, I gasped with surprise.
There was a beige doctor’s exam table, the back inclined. It was covered
with a fresh section of white paper, just as it would have been in a doctor’s
office. And it even had . . . stirrups?
“Oh . . .” I smiled nervously at him. “Wow.”
He picked up a faded green cotton hospital gown and handed it to me, his
expression all business.
“You’ll need to change into this. Everything off. Leave it open in the front.”
He left the room and closed the door behind him. I clutched the gown in my
hand, wondering if this would be hot or just weird.
No turning back now. With a deep breath, I slipped out of the gray cotton
dress and sexy black heels I’d worked so hard on picking out for tonight. Same
with the white lacy bra and panties. I put the gown on and slid up onto the exam
table, holding the gown’s two sides together in the front.
Kyle’s storage room was mostly packed boxes stacked a few high and some
unused furniture. But sitting here in a gown on an exam table felt very much like
actually being at a doctor’s office.
When the door handle turned, I sat up straight, my heart racing. Kyle now
had a stethoscope around his neck.
“Miss Hobbs, I’m Dr. Lockhart. I’ll be doing your pelvic exam today. Let’s
get your feet into those stirrups, please.”
Well, hello. I liked his authoritative doctor tone.
I put my heels on the cool metal, my eyes locked on his.
“Good,” he said. “Let’s start with a breast exam. Open your gown, please.”
I opened it, expecting to see his eyes widen, but he kept on his impassive,
professional face.
He gently squeezed each breast, taking his time to feel every inch of them,
and then he traced his fingertip around each nipple until they were hard.
“Perfect,” he murmured. “I’ll just listen to your heart now.”
He stood beside the table and put the end of his stethoscope against my
chest. His other hand brushed across my thigh, leaving a trail of goose bumps in
its wake.
He stepped back from the table. “All right, let’s get the exam underway.”
Even though it was Kyle, a thrill passed through me as he put his hands on
my knees at the foot of the table.
“Keep your legs spread nice and wide for me, Miss Hobbs.”
“Okay,” I said, the word coming out strangled.
He pulled up a stool and sat down on it. Even though he wasn’t touching me,
I was fully exposed to him, and it felt hot and forbidden.
“Are you sexually active, Miss Hobbs?”
I cleared my throat. “Yes.”
“How many partners?”
“Just one.”
“I see.” He ran his fingertip up and down the length of my slit, and I gasped.
 “And tell me . . . what kinds of things do you do with your partner?”
“I . . . we . . .” He slipped a fingertip inside me, and I moaned. “We have sex.
Really good sex.”
“I need you to be specific, Miss Hobbs. Where does he fuck you?”
Holy shit. The question, in his clinical doctor tone, made me clench my
thighs together.
“Legs wide open for me,” he said.
“Yes. I . . . he fucks my pussy.”
“I see. And do you like it?”
“I love it.”
“What else?”
I swallowed hard, desire making me feel warm all over. “I gave him a blow
job, but . . . I want him to fuck my mouth. I fantasize about it.”
“Is that right?”
“Yes. I want him to hold on to my hair and fuck my mouth.”
He slid his finger in farther. “You’re doing very well, Miss Hobbs.”
“Ohh.” I moved my hips to sink his finger in even farther.
“Do you let your partner fuck your ass?”
“Oh, God. I . . . haven’t, but I would.”
He slipped a second finger inside me. “Have you ever been fucked in the
ass?”
“No.”
“You’re very wet, Miss Hobbs. Does talking about your partner always make
you this wet?”
I leaned up on my elbows and looked at him. “Yes.”
He kept his eyes locked on mine as he pumped his fingers in and out of me,
slowly and deeply.
“Leave the gown open all the way for me,” he said.
I peeled the sides of it apart until it hung from my arms. My back was arched
into the air, and I was grinding my hips up and down on Kyle’s fingers, all
inhibitions forgotten.
“Miss Hobbs, I think you’re enjoying this,” he said, a smile playing on his
lips.
I just moaned, unable to form any words.
“You’re a very dirty patient, aren’t you?”
“Yes. Oh, my God . . . yes.”
“Does your partner ever suck on that gorgeous clit?”
I just panted, my legs on the verge of shaking, as he lowered his face and
brushed his tongue across my clit.
It was beyond good. I felt it in every nerve ending—a deep, sensual promise
of the pleasure to come.
With one more sweep of his tongue, I came hard. He sucked on my clit and
worked his fingers in and out of me until I’d collapsed onto the table, breathless.
“You’ve been such a good patient, Miss Hobbs,” he said, standing up. “But
look what you’ve done to me.”
He rubbed the erection that was straining against his pants. I scooted my ass
down past the edge of the table, opening my knees as far as they would go.
“You’ve earned a reward for doing so well,” he said, untying his pants and
pushing them down.
In an instant, he was buried completely inside me. He groaned hard and held
on to my thighs, pumping himself in and out as I held on to the sides of the table.
The harder he fucked me, the better it felt. His strained expression of
satisfaction made me feel like a goddess.
Once again, Kyle was topping every sexual experience I’d ever had. He
grunted as he pounded into me, and within a couple minutes, I came again.
When he slammed into me for the last time with a guttural groan, I smiled and
pushed a lock of sweaty hair out of my face.
He exhaled deeply and looked down at me. “How was that?”
I laughed and sat up, kissing him. “That . . . was fucking incredible.”
“Yeah?”
“Oh, yeah.”
“I thought so, too. You want to go out for dinner now?”
I gave him a confused look. “Out?”
“Out. You and me.”
 “In Lovely?”
“Yes. May the gossipmongers see our expressions of gratification and know
that we just fucked.”
My emotions overflowed. I wouldn’t let myself cry. Not now. That would be
embarrassing.
But I couldn’t help the one tear that escaped. Kyle was leaving his comfort
zone for me. It felt as amazing as the sex had. Maybe even better.
Kyle
The next Friday night, I squinted at Mason through a cloud of cigar smoke.
“Are your nuts still in there? Is April letting you keep them until after the
ceremony?”
“Funny, fucker,” he said, glaring. “And you’re one to talk.”
“I hear you.” I shook my head. “I do. And you know I love April.”
My brothers and I were sitting in the great room of the lodge I’d rented for
Mason’s bachelor weekend. Dad was flying in tomorrow morning, and we were
all going hunting. Which meant tonight, the five of us were alone. And more
than a little drunk.
Justin passed me a fresh bottle of beer and sat down next to me on the leather
sofa, putting his feet up by mine on the coffee table.
“Did I hear right?” he asked me. “You’re seeing Meredith Hobbs now?”
“Yep.”
He arched his brows and sipped his beer. “Seeing her, or . . . seeing her?”
“All of the above.”
Justin glanced at Reed, who was lighting a cigar.
“I’m fine with it,” he said after his first puff.
“And on that subject . . .” Mason stood and held his beer in the air, wobbling
on his feet. “Are we good to toast to the loss of your blow job virginity, oldest
brother?”
Justin stared at me, his mouth open in horror. “Your what?”
“Kim refused to blow him,” Austin said, sounding both appalled and
amused.
“So you’ve never . . . ?”
“Has she popped your cherry or what?” Mason bellowed.
“I don’t kiss and tell,” I said, taking another puff of my cigar.
“I don’t give a fuck about the kissing,” Mason said. “My question is, do you
get your dick sucked and tell?”
The others found that pretty damn funny, but once they were finished
laughing, all eyes were on me.
“Come on, man,” Austin said. “Just a yes or a no. You’ll be thirty-eight soon.
If Mason accidentally shoots me while we’re hunting tomorrow, I don’t want to
die thinking you’ve never had your knob polished.”
“It wouldn’t be an accident, fucker,” Mason quipped.
I looked at him. “Mason, do you want to tell us about April’s blow jobs?”
“Fuck yeah. She’s incredible at them. When she wears those librarian glasses
. . . I’m getting hard just thinking about it.”
“And how would she feel about you telling us that?”
He shrugged. “You’re my brothers. I’m sure she tells Ivy about my world-
class pussy-eating skills.”
“We talk about it at dinner most nights,” Reed said, nodding.
“Meredith and I are taking things slow,” I said. “We kiss all the time, and last
weekend I made it to first base.”
“Are you fucking kidding me?” Mason yelled. “Are you? Because that is the
hugest, steamingest pile of bullshit I have ever—”
“Yes, I’m kidding, you dumbass. I’m not going into detail, but yeah, a toast
wouldn’t be out of line.”
Mason threw his arms in the air, splashing beer onto the lodge’s wood plank
floor.
“To the end of Kyle’s blow job virginity!” he yelled. “Hopefully, before he
has gray hair on his nuts.”
We clinked bottles and drank. After a few seconds of silence, Reed met my
eyes from the chair he sat in across from the couch.
“So things are good with you guys, then?”
“Things are amazing with us,” I said. “I’m happier than I’ve ever been.”
“Good. You guys both deserve that.”
“Just don’t get serious about her,” Justin said. “This is only the second
woman you’ve ever been with, right? You need to add a few more notches to
your belt before you settle down again.”
 “I’m already serious about her. There’s no other woman out there who could
compare to Meredith for me. And not only do we have amazing chemistry, she
loves the boys and they love her back. Hell, they wanted to stay home with her
instead of coming with us this weekend.”
“Mom asked me to try to talk some sense into you about her,” Reed said.
“Good luck with that,” I said sarcastically.
“I told her I think it’s great. I don’t know if I changed her views on things,
but I tried.”
“I appreciate it. Mom and I are gonna end up throwing down over this.”
“Don’t do that,” Austin said.
I looked at Mason. “I want to bring Meredith to the wedding.”
He just looked at me for a second. “Okay? What, are you asking me or
something?”
“Mom told me not to bring her.”
He nodded. “Because it’s at her house, so she feels like it’s her deal.”
“I guess. And I get it if you don’t want family tension at your wedding. I
won’t ask her if you don’t want me to. But I won’t not ask her because Mom told
me to. Or not to.” I shook my head. “Hell, I’m drunk.”
“It’s my wedding, and I say bring her. April will say the same thing.”
“Thanks. I want her to sit with the boys.” I took a long puff on my cigar and
turned to Mason. “So when are you and April gonna start making babies?”
“Hopefully, soon.”
“Yeah? Good deal, man.”
“Hey,” Reed said. “Uh . . . I was planning to wait ’til tomorrow to tell you
guys this, but I can’t . . . I’m too happy to wait. Ivy’s pregnant.”
A collective yell of excitement sounded. We all got up and crushed him in a
group hug.
“Congratulations, man,” Mason said, grinning. “Damn, that is awesome.”
“Thanks. She’s two months along.”
“Noah must be thrilled,” I said, clapping Reed on the shoulder.
“We just told him the other day. He keeps asking Ivy how much longer ’til
he’s a big brother.”
 “He’ll only ask like five thousand more times before the baby’s born,”
Austin said.
“Are you hoping for a boy or a girl?” Mason asked Reed.
“I really don’t care. Just healthy, that’s all we hope for.”
“This calls for another shot,” Mason said, tipping a bottle and filling the
bottoms of the five glass tumblers on the table.
I groaned, foreseeing a serious hangover tomorrow, and picked up one of the
glasses.
“To Reed’s fastest sperm!” Mason called out. “And to another little
Lockhart.”
“Here, here,” I said, tipping back the drink.
I finished my cigar and got up from the couch, listening to a conversation
between Reed and Austin.
“I was really glad to dodge that bullet,” Reed said. “I couldn’t have taken the
case, anyway. The whole thing’s hit Ivy pretty hard and she’s actually spent
some time with Madison, so I’m conflicted out.”
They were talking about Patrick Rhodes, the man charged with sexually
assaulting Madison Golden. Reed was a part-time public defender, but the main
public defender had been assigned to Rhodes’s case.
“That guy’s a fucking monster,” I said.
“How’s Madison doing?” Austin asked me.
“I don’t know anything firsthand.”
“Did you treat her the night it happened?” Justin asked.
I nodded. “I think everyone’s heard I was there that night, but I can’t go into
detail. It was a hard one for me. Really hard. I treated Rhodes, too.”
“No fucking way,” Mason said.
“I had to.”
“No, I know. I understand. I just can’t imagine.”
I looked at Reed. “I’m glad you didn’t get his case.”
“I’ve got a whole new perspective as a parent,” he said. “I don’t know what
I’d do if someone hurt Noah that way. I’d be fit to commit murder.”
“Me too. I hope that bastard gets ripped apart in prison.” I yawned and
glanced at the clock. “Well, on that somber note, I’m going to bed.”
“What? It’s only midnight,” Mason said. “And where my strippers at?”
“I’m too old for that shit. I’m going to call Meredith before she goes to
sleep.”
“Awww,” Justin cried dramatically. “Kyle’s gonna go check in.”
“Fuck you, man. I’ll see you ladies back out here at four thirty.”
“At what time?” Mason cried.
“We’re meeting Dad at six.”
“I’m going to bed,” Mason said.
Everyone else followed, and the lodge was quiet when I got into the king-
size bed in my room. When I took out my phone to call Meredith, there was a
photo and a text from her, sent two hours ago.
Meredith: So sleepy. We swam for four hours and went out for dinner
w/my dad. I’m in Eric’s bed bc he fell asleep reading me Harry Potter.
Hope you’re having fun. xoxo
The photo was of the boys jumping into the pool, both midair with their arms
and legs out, smiling. It made me smile, too.
A year ago, I’d wondered if my sons would ever be carefree again. They’d
been devastated by Kim leaving, because even though she was an out-of-control
alcoholic, she was their mother. Kids at school had teased them about their mom
not loving them. There had been nights when they’d slept in my bed, one or both
of them crying but trying not to show it.
We’d gotten through that time together, and I’d never even considered
finding a woman who would end up being what all three of us needed.
Meredith was more than what we needed, though. She was what we
deserved.
Meredith
I’d made blueberry pancakes for breakfast Sunday morning, and Eric gave me a
sly, blue-tinged smile across the kitchen table.
“My dad likes you,” he said.
“I like him, too.”
His big brown eyes turned serious. “He’s gonna kiss you.”
My heart melted. I was so crazy about Kyle’s sons. “Okay. Thanks for telling
me. I’ll definitely be ready.”
Jordan came padding into the kitchen, only looking half awake.
“Want some pancakes and sausage?” I asked him.
He nodded and sat down at the table.
“What should we do today, guys?” I piled food onto Jordan’s plate and
looked between them. “We can go somewhere if you want.”
“Like where?” Eric said through a bite of pancake.
We talked through the options and decided to go to the movies this
afternoon. After they finished their food, they both got in Kyle’s bed to watch
Sunday morning cartoons.
I was at the sink rinsing dishes when the sound of the garage door that led
into the kitchen opening made me turn around.
Grace Lockhart was standing there sizing me up, a casserole dish in her
hands. I immediately felt a sick, churning sensation in my stomach.
“I assumed Stephanie was watching the kids this weekend,” she said, her
tone tinged with annoyance. “So I brought breakfast over.”
I switched the faucet off and dried my hands on the towel by the sink.
“Thank you,” I said. “For bringing that, I mean.”
“Where are the boys?”
“Watching cartoons in the bedroom.”
She nodded. “The bedroom. And I’m sure you’re about to go climb right in
between them.”
The hostility in her tone made my cheeks heat. She’d blindsided me here, in
Kyle’s house. This place held nothing but happy memories for me. It was a safe
spot, where I knew I wouldn’t be judged.
Until now. I met her steely gaze across the room.
“Is there anything else you need, Grace?”
In other words, leave. She didn’t need to be standing in front of me to cast
judgment—she did it from afar already.
“This is my son’s home.”
“I’m aware.”
“And I am welcome here anytime.” She set her dish down on the table and
walked over to me.
I wanted to run, like I always did. To retreat from her disdainful glare and the
hurtful comments she surely had banked up for me.
But this time, there was no place to go. I squeezed the dish towel in my
hands and stood tall.
“I see through you, Meredith,” she said in a low tone. “I always have.”
“You see what you want to see. The truth doesn’t matter to you.”
She narrowed her eyes. “What I see is a woman going on thirty who latched
on to a divorced doctor’s children to ingratiate herself to him. If you knew what
those two boys have been through—”
“I do know. And that’s not what happened.”
“Kyle is lonely and lost. And for you to think of him as some sort of meal
ticket is disgraceful, even for you.”
I scoffed. “Even for me? The worst person in the world, just because I
decided not to marry Reed, right?”
“You calculated that whole thing to humiliate our family.”
Nearly a decade’s worth of anger and resentment finally boiled over.
“You know what, Grace? Kyle wasn’t the least bit lost when we started
seeing each other. He was just a single dad with a lot on his shoulders, but he
carried every ounce of his responsibilities so well I was in awe of him. I still am,
every day. And I don’t need a meal ticket. I’ve got my own career and my own
home.”
She shook her head. “What you don’t have, though, is a family of your own.
So you figured you’d just slide into this well-off one. I know how opportunists
work. You may not even consciously realize you’re doing it.”
“The saddest part of this whole thing,” I said, smiling ruefully, “is that you
don’t realize how incredible Kyle is. You think I see dollar signs, but I see the
best man I’ve ever known.”
“Don’t you dare accuse me of undervaluing my son. I know exactly who he
is, and he’s way too good for you.”
“Maybe,” I admitted. “But that’s for him to decide.”
“You know exactly what you’re doing. Preying on his weak spots and—”
“I am not preying on anyone.” My tone was so low it was almost a whisper.
“Shame on you for being such a spiteful, bitter person. I’m not perfect. I own
that. I made a mistake, and I’ve apologized to Reed for it. I’m not carrying
around guilt or shame over it anymore.”
“We’re a close-knit family, Meredith. You know that. And if Kyle is forced
to choose, don’t think for one second he’ll choose you. This time, it may be you
left holding the bag.”
“Just go.” I was emotionally wrung out and overwhelmed. “Take this up with
—”
“Grandma!” Eric called from the living room.
Grace and I locked eyes, a moment of understanding passing between us.
“Good morning, grandson,” she said warmly, opening her arms to him for a
hug.
“This is Meredith, the lady Dad wants to kiss,” he said, grinning up at her.
The look on her face was priceless, but it quickly morphed into a phony look
of kindness.
“We’ve met, yes.” She smoothed a hand over his hair. “Would you like some
bacon, egg, and cheese casserole? The one I make on Saturday mornings
sometimes?”
“No, thanks. Meredith made pancakes.”
Another silent point scored for me. I arched a brow at Grace.
 “Grandma, what are you doing today?” Eric looked up at her hopefully.
“Nothing important. You boys are welcome to come over to Grandma’s if
you’d like.”
“You can come to the movies with us!”
No. Oh, hell no. It was all I could do not to say it out loud.
“Well . . . I don’t know about that,” she said.
“Please, Grandma. It’ll be fun. I’ll share my Sour Patch Kids with you.”
I couldn’t have said no to that. And Grace couldn’t seem to, either. She gave
me a look that was both helpless and miserable.
“I suppose . . . I could,” she mumbled.
“Yes!” He looked over at me. “Meredith, will you come watch cartoons with
us? The one with that guy I was telling you about, the all-fiery and orange one.
It’s on, and I want you to see him.”
“I’ll be there in a bit,” I said, smiling.
Eric left the room, and Grace and I stared at each other silently for a few
seconds.
“I’m not going away,” I said. “So you and I need to find some common
ground.”
She sighed softly, then nodded. “What time are you leaving for the movies?”
“We’re going to lunch at the deli at twelve thirty and then to the movies right
after.”
“I’ll come back over at twelve-fifteen.” She walked over to the table, picked
up her casserole and left.
I wanted to send a distressed text to Kyle, but I decided against it. I could do
this. For Jordan and Eric, I could spend an afternoon with Grace and even be
nice to her. And then I’d talk to Kyle about it.

I dreaded Grace’s return, but she put on a happy face for the boys. As I drove the
four of us to the restaurant in my Jeep, Grace’s silver hair blowing in the breeze
from my passenger seat, I wished I had a photo to send to Kyle.
He would either laugh or piss his pants. Maybe both.
 When I found a downtown parking spot, Grace smoothed down her hair and
led the way into the restaurant.
The boys were chatty, saving us from having to make awkward conversation.
As Jordan talked about his baseball team, I caught a glimpse of Grace, and my
mind wandered to a memory I hadn’t thought of in a long time.
My mother had died seven months before the wedding date Reed and I had
set. So it was just two months after losing her that I’d had to shop for a wedding
dress, minus the one person I wanted there with me.
My bridesmaids, all college-aged like me at the time, had been preoccupied
with how my tan lines would look and whether I should wear a veil. They’d
laughed and admired dresses when we got to the shop, while I’d put on a fake
smile and dreaded the thought of that first glance in the mirror dressed in a
wedding gown my mother would never get to see me in.
Grace had been waiting for me as I stepped out of the dressing room. She’d
taken my hand and led me to an empty viewing room. As soon as I stepped onto
the podium and saw myself in the white beaded gown, I’d lost it, covering my
face with my hands and sobbing.
She’d put an arm around my shoulders and passed me tissue after tissue,
taking the used ones when I was done with them.
When I’d finally gotten it together several minutes later, she’d said, “I hate
that any of this day has to be bitter for you, Meredith. I hope we can find some
sweet in it, too. Your mom would be overjoyed to be beside you right now. I
can’t replace her, but I’m honored to be here with you.”
I’d nodded and cried some more. That catharsis had helped me. Instead of
holding in the pain, I’d let it all out, and she’d been there to share it. I was able
to try on dresses after that and even ended up having a good time.
“Will you cut up my spaghetti?” Eric asked me.
“Sure.”
“Dad cuts it really small.”
I felt Grace watching me as I cut his food into the small bites he wanted. Did
she still remember the time when she hadn’t despised me?
When Reed and I were together, I’d been as in love with the Lockhart family
as I was with him. The house had always been filled with happy laughter and the
male banter of the brothers. Henry and Grace set high expectations for their
sons, but they also loved and supported them in every way.
I’d panicked over the thought of joining the family I loved so much when I
knew I wasn’t ready for marriage. I hated the thought of letting every last one of
them down—not just Reed.
“Can I sit by you at the movies?” Eric asked me.
“Sure.”
“I want to sit by you,” Jordan said, giving me an imploring look.
I arched my brows, sending him a silent message, and he turned to Grace.
“I’ll sit by you, Grandma.”
He’d understood me telling him to include Grace. That was a little bit freaky
and a lot cool.
“Just remember Meredith has two sides,” Grace said with a smile. “You can
both sit by her, boys.”
Was she being gracious or just making sure she wouldn’t have to sit by me?
Either way, I decided to take it as a win.
The movie we watched about a man trapped in a cat’s body was cheesy and
horrible, but the boys loved it. Another win.
When we pulled back into the driveway, Grace got out of my Jeep, hugged
the boys, and said she was leaving.
“Thanks for including me,” she said to me.
Her appreciation almost sounded . . . genuine? I was too shocked to respond
for a second, but I recovered.
“Thanks for coming. And thanks for buying. That was very nice of you.”
She nodded at me and went to her car. The boys and I went into the house,
and they both sat down with electronic devices.
I sat down myself and texted Kyle.
Me: How’s the hunting going?
Kyle: Done for the day. We’re cooking the fish we caught today at our
lodge.
 Me: Hope you’re having fun.
Kyle: It’s been a blast. Miss you guys.
Me: Miss you too.
Kyle: Hey, don’t make plans for 2 weeks from yesterday. I want you to
come with us to Mason and April’s wedding if you can.
I read his message twice, my heart full with happiness. Being asked to a
family event was a pretty big deal for me.
Me: Sure, if you want me to, I’ll be there.
Kyle: Don’t worry about my mom. I’ll take care of it.
Me: Speaking of your mom . . .

Kyle: Oh, shit. What??

Me: She came over.
Kyle: SHIT. Good thing my shotgun’s here and not in my house.
Me: Probably.
Kyle: How bad was it?
Me: Words were exchanged. But then Eric invited her to the movies with
us.

Kyle: I just cringed so hard for you.

Me: She came. Rode next to me in my Jeep.
Kyle: You’re joking.
Me: No.
Kyle: Wow. Did she insult or offend you in any way? If she did, I’m
going to her house tomorrow before I come home to set her straight.
Me: Nothing I couldn’t handle.
 Kyle: Usually just talking about her rattles you.
Me: I know. I’m wearing my big-girl panties today.
Kyle: Oh, do tell. Like cotton briefs? I could get into those. ;)
Me: You’ve got a standing invitation.
Kyle: Damn. Mason needs help cleaning the fish. I have to go.
Me: Have fun. See you tomorrow.
Kyle: Can’t wait.
I was still smiling a couple minutes after our conversation ended. It wasn’t
just because of Kyle, but also because I’d finally stood up for myself. I’d never
done that—not with Grace, not with the guy at work who called me the
Runaway Bride or any of the former friends who’d shunned me after I broke it
off with Reed. Not with anyone.
It felt good.
Kyle
I’d only been gone three nights for the bachelor party in Montana, but it felt like
longer. When I walked into the house and the boys ran toward me, I hugged
them and then picked one of them up in each arm and carried them into the
living room.
They were hitting me with questions, rapid-fire.
“Did you get a deer?”
“Could you see our house from the plane?”
“Did you touch fish guts?”
“Where’d you put my baseball shirt?”
I set them down and took the slingshots I’d bought them in Montana out of
my carry-on bag.
“No pointing stuff at people, or these are gone,” I said, handing them over.
Jordan’s gleeful smile made me sense that something would be broken with
his slingshot in the near future. But I’d had one as a kid, and I hoped they’d have
as much fun with theirs as I had.
The boys were out the back door without another word, and I pulled
Meredith into my arms and kissed her. The boys would see us being affectionate
at some point, anyway. Might as well be sooner rather than later.
“You smell like smoke and . . . the woods,” she said against my lips.
“Yeah, I need to shower.”
“I like it, though.”
“Oh, really? The smoke’s probably from all the cigars we smoked.”
“How did I not know you smoke cigars?”
“It’s not very often that I do. I ordered a box for here, too, though, in case
you ever want a little Bill and Monica action.”
She laughed and wrapped her arms around my neck. “I like that you aren’t
funny all the time, but when you are, you’re really funny.”
 “I don’t think anyone’s ever considered me funny before.”
“I do.”
I kissed her again, squeezing her waist. That made me think of the time she
rode me on the couch, and I started to get hard.
“Did you guys eat?” I asked, releasing my hold on her.
“We did. There’s sandwich stuff in the fridge, though.”
We went into the kitchen, and she sat on the counter while I made myself a
roast beef sandwich.
“I need to run a quick errand if you can stay a little longer,” I said.
“Sure. I took the whole day off work, so it doesn’t matter when you get
back.”
I finished my sandwich and went to find my carry-on bag in the living room,
taking out a small black box.
“Just a thank you for watching the boys this weekend,” I said, holding it out
to Meredith.
Her lips parted with surprise. “Oh, no. Kyle, I was happy to do it. I had lots
of fun with them. They even helped with yard work at my place.”
“Then consider it a thank you for making me so happy.”
Tears pooled in her eyes. “You don’t have to, though. I’m happy, too.”
“Take it, Mer.”
She reached forward and took the box. I shifted nervously as I waited for her
to open it, because I hadn’t picked out a gift for a woman in a very long time.
Kim had always preferred to choose her own presents.
After looking in the box that held a white gold necklace with a letter “M”
pendant, she gave me the wide smile that lit up her whole face.
“This is beautiful. Thank you.” She cupped my cheek and leaned up on her
toes to kiss me. “Will you put it on me?”
“Sure, if I can work the tiny clasp with my giant fingers.”
It took three tries, but I got it on her. She brushed her fingers over the
pendant, her cheeks a pretty pink shade that reminded me of the way she looked
after sex.
“I’m gonna go do my thing,” I said. “I won’t be too long.”
 “See you later.”
I’d planned on taking a shower and spending more time with Meredith and
the boys before I went to see my mom, but I was too eager to wait.
When I parked in the driveway of my parents’ house, I saw Mom on her
knees next to a flowerbed by the deck, pulling out tiny weeds.
She looked up as I approached, holding a hand over her eyes to block the
sun’s glare. “Well, what a nice surprise. Your father said you boys had a great
trip.”
“We did.”
She went to stand, and I offered her my arm. She held on to it while I helped
her up with my other hand.
“Getting up and down is much creakier than it used to be,” she said, shaking
her head.
She took off her gardening gloves and headed for the back door of the house.
“Let’s have some sweet tea, shall we?”
“Sure, sounds good.”
I followed her into the kitchen, where everything was as neat and clean as I
remembered it being growing up. Mom had taken lots of pride in keeping a nice
home for her family.
It was quiet in here, which was rare. Usually, there were kids underfoot when
I was in Mom’s kitchen, and my brothers were often carrying on conversations
over the noise.
Mom set a glass of tea down for each of us and then started arranging
cookies from her jar on a plate.
“You don’t need to do that, Mom. Sit down and relax.”
“I don’t mind a bit, though.”
She put the plate of oatmeal raisin cookies down, and I took one.
“Meredith tells me you came by yesterday,” I said, tearing the cookie in half
and putting one half in my mouth.
“I did. Of course, I wouldn’t have if I’d known she was there. I assumed
when you didn’t ask me to watch the boys that you’d asked Stephanie.”
“No, I asked Meredith first.”
 She held my gaze for a few seconds of silence.
“I like Meredith a lot. So do the boys. She and I are together now, and I need
to know if you’re going to accept it.”
“Together? It’s only been about a month, Kyle.”
“I didn’t say ‘married’ or anything, Mom. We’re dating, or whatever the hell
people call it these days. If I come over for a family dinner, you should plan on
her being with me.”
“It’s a little sudden, don’t you think?”
I shook my head. “The four of us—me and Meredith and the boys—we’re
good for each other. I thought at first that I needed to shield them from seeing
me in a relationship that may or may not work out, but that’s not right. This is
life. I got knocked on my ass by my disaster of a marriage, but I’m not quitting. I
didn’t know what it was like to be with someone who cared about my happiness
the way Meredith does, and now I’m not giving that up.”
She arched a brow. “Well, at least you acknowledge that it may not work
out.”
I laughed and leaned my elbows on the table. “That’s what you got out of
that?”
“I’m just concerned for you, that’s all. And I guess it’s good that Meredith
and I finally got our cards on the table.”
“What cards might those be?”
She squirmed a little in her chair. “She called me spiteful and bitter.”
“Uh-huh. After you said what to her?”
She sniffed and looked away. “I’m not proud of some of my behavior, I will
admit that.”
“You know what, Mom? This can’t possibly be only about her not marrying
Reed. I chose Meredith and I’m right on the edge of being completely in love
with her, so if you want to see me over here, she needs to be not just allowed, but
welcomed. And I think you need to think about why you’re carrying around all
these hard feelings for her and figure out how to let go of them.”
She looked down at the table. “I have been thinking about that, actually.
Being around Meredith yesterday brought back memories for me.”
 “You two used to be inseparable when she was with Reed. It drove Kim
completely nuts. She said she felt like the Cinderella daughter-in-law.”
Mom laughed at that. “Well, that sounds like something Kim would say.
Cinderella in diamonds and designer clothes.”
“I don’t want to talk about Kim. My point is that you and Meredith used to
be close. Can’t you see that all the things you used to love about her are still
there?”
She refilled both our glasses as I waited for her to respond. The seconds
passed, and I knew she was thinking about her answer.
“You know . . . I think that’s the problem, actually. I loved Meredith like my
own daughter. Especially after her mother passed away. She was the girl I never
had—inviting me out shopping and baking cookies with me—and never because
she had to, but because she wanted to. When she ran out on Reed, in my heart, I
felt like she was running out on me, too. Like somehow our family wasn’t
enough for her.”
The deep-set wrinkles in the corners of her eyes reminded me that my mom
wouldn’t be here forever. And like the rest of us, she’d had her share of
disappointments.
“She doesn’t have many people who love her, Mom,” I said softly. “Me and
the boys and her dad. That’s it. She’s still shunned and left out of things in this
town, and she doesn’t deserve that. Meredith could really use you back in her
corner, but the decision is on you.”
“I’ve behaved terribly.” She shook her head and looked out the window.
“So do better. Let’s put all this behind us.”
She smiled. “I’d like that. You know, it did my heart good to see her with the
boys yesterday. She’s very good with them.”
“Yes, she is.”
“Why don’t you and Meredith join us all for family dinner Friday night,
then? The boys can stay after, and you two can go out and have some fun.”
“That sounds great, Mom. Thanks.” I stood up, taking another cookie from
the plate. “I’d appreciate you apologizing to her before Friday. Just to clear the
air.”
 “Of course.”
She stood up and I hugged her.
“Oh, it’s a hell of a thing when your kids get smarter than you,” she said.
“I love you, Mom.”
“I love you, too.”
I took a bite of the cookie in my hand. “These are good.”
“Take as many as you want.”
I grabbed a few for the road and headed for home, finally feeling like
everything was falling into place.
Meredith
Sliding on my dark sunglasses, I pulled out of the Hobbs Auto Plaza parking lot
and headed for Kyle’s house. Leaving work early for once to go be bad felt
really good.
It was early afternoon on the Wednesday after Kyle’s trip to Montana. Jordan
and Eric were both at an all-day Boy Scout day camp until five, and Kyle had
texted me over lunch that his afternoon office hours had been canceled due to his
nurse going home sick.
That meant we had the house to ourselves. I’d had nothing but Dickory to
keep me satisfied since my erotic pelvic exam from Kyle, and I was hot and
bothered for the real thing.
Kyle’s Range Rover was in one of the three garage stalls attached to his
house, and another one was open for my Jeep. I parked and went inside, finding
him in the kitchen.
He was wearing the blue scrubs that always got me going, drinking a bottle
of water, and looking at something on his phone.
“Hey,” he said, setting the phone down when I walked in.
“Hi.”
“I like your hair up like that.”
“Oh, thanks.” It was just a simple, high ponytail, but one of the things I liked
best about Kyle was that he complimented me on small things like that.
“C’mere,” he said, putting a hand on my lower back and pulling me close.
As soon as he kissed me, I felt a spiral of warmth low in my belly. It swirled
and grew stronger as his lips traced their way down my neck.
“I missed this,” he said, his voice husky.
“Me too. God, you feel good.” I ran my hands over the slight ridges and
valleys of his biceps, up to the back of his neck, and into his hair.
He squeezed my ass and nipped at my lower lip. At the sound of my moan,
he leaned his forehead on mine and spoke against my mouth, his breath hot on
my skin. “You remember that thing you said you want to do? Involving my dick
and your mouth?”
“Of course,” I murmured.
“I’ve jerked off daily to that fantasy in the shower.”
I smiled and found the strings at the waist of his scrubs, untying them and
sliding his pants and boxer briefs down.
“Let’s make that more than a fantasy, then.”
With a deep exhale, he pulled his shirt off over his head and tossed it to the
ground as I got on my knees in front of him. It was good that his kitchen blinds
were drawn because once again, we weren’t going to make it into the bedroom.
I drew out his anticipation, licking my lips, and then teasing the head of his
cock with the top of my tongue. Slowly, I unbuttoned my blouse and took it off,
looking up at him through my lashes.
He stroked his hand up and down his erection as he watched me, his gaze
hungry. I took his balls in my hand, rubbing them as I slowly took as much of his
length into my mouth as I could fit.
“Ah, fuck,” he said, groaning. “Feels so good, baby.”
He wound a hand into the top of my hair then, taking a firm hold and
thrusting himself into my mouth.
I moaned against him, loving the force of him pounding into me. He grunted
and pulled on my hair as he fucked my mouth, sounding blissfully out of control.
The rhythm was perfect—hard and fast—and I felt him getting close to
coming. I cupped his balls and tugged on them gently, making him groan loudly.
“No,” he said under his breath, pulling himself out of my mouth. “Not yet.”
He stood me up and unfastened my pants, tugging them down forcefully and
then ripping the clasp of my bra apart.
“Bend over,” he said in a low tone.
I put my naked chest against his kitchen island, and within two seconds, he
was buried inside me. The fullness of him was everything I needed in that
moment.
“Oh, God!” I cried. “Just like that, baby. Yes, yes . . . Ahh.”
 “I fucking love the way you take my cock,” he said, his voice strained. He
grabbed the back of my neck and squeezed. “You look so goddamn sexy bent
over like this for me.”
“So the rumors are true, then,” a cold, unfamiliar female voice said. “Isn’t
this a fine homecoming?”
I looked up from the island and screamed. Kim Lockhart was standing on the
other side of the room, arms crossed, staring at us.
“What the fuck are you doing in my house?” Kyle roared.
He pulled out of me and picked up his shirt, handing it to me, and then got
his pants and stepped into them.
“The house with the cabinets I toiled over choosing for three weeks?” Kim
yelled back. “The one I brought my babies home from the hospital to?”
“This is my goddamn house, and you know it. I bought out every penny of
your equity and then some. How the hell did you get in here?”
She shrugged one shoulder. “I just came in through the garage. It was open.
But that’s not the point, Kyle. The point is why are you banging your brother’s
ex on our kitchen island?”
“My kitchen island,” he said hotly. “And my girlfriend.”
“Jesus.” Kim gave me a look of disgust. “I couldn’t believe it when I heard
you were fucking her. I had to come see for myself.”
“Get the fuck out of my house,” Kyle said, his eyes flashing dark with anger.
I’d never seen him get mad. Wearing only his pants, he looked like a fighter
about to enter the ring. The veins in his neck stood out slightly, and he scowled
at Kim.
“I want to see the kids,” Kim said, staring up at him fearlessly.
She was maybe five-foot two, more than a foot shorter than him. Her giant
boobs were out of proportion on her tiny, tanned frame. Long, bleached-blond
hair trailed all the way down her back.
“You’d better have your attorney reach my attorney about that, as we agreed
in the divorce.”
“I miss my boys.” Her voice wavered with emotion. “It’s been a year, Kyle. I
miss all of you.”
 I felt the weight of everything come crashing down on me as I silently put
my clothes back on. Things had started to feel perfect in my life recently, and
now Hurricane Kim was here to make it all blow up around me.
“You left, Kim. It was your choice.”
“I was sick. You know I was. I’ve been in rehab.”
“I don’t give a shit if you’ve been on Mars. You don’t abandon your kids for
a year without so much as a letter or a phone call.”
“I didn’t abandon them. I knew they were safe with you. I had to get help.”
My throat was tight as I put my purse over my shoulder and edged toward
the door. I was an interloper here, intruding on family issues that didn’t involve
me.
“Don’t leave, Mer,” Kyle said, still glaring at Kim. “She’s the one who’s
leaving.”
“Mer?” Kim grimaced and looked me up and down. “You’ll just spread your
legs for whichever Lockhart brother asks you to, apparently.”
Kyle put his hands on his knees, bending down slightly and shaking his head.
When he stood back up, he locked his hands behind his neck.
“I’m calling the cops if you don’t leave,” he said to Kim. “Don’t come here
ever again.”
“We need to talk.”
“The only talking I’m doing with you is through my attorney.”
“Who, Reed?” She rolled her eyes. “Your brother who fucked your new
girlfriend before he passed her to you?”
She was disgusting, and so much worse than I remembered.
Kyle took out his phone and dialed the police.
“Really nice,” Kim said dramatically. “Fine, I’ll go.”
She walked over to me and pointed in my face, angry tears shining in her
eyes. “This is my house and my family. I was sick. How dare you come in here
and—”
Kyle moved to stand between us. “Stay behind me,” he murmured to me.
“She can be violent when she’s drunk.”
“Drunk?” Kim practically screeched. “I’ve been sober for eight months, you
bastard. Eight months without a single drop.”
Kyle turned toward me. “The cops are on their way. Just don’t engage.”
I nodded, my heart pounding so hard I could hear it whooshing in my ears.
“I’m going to find my kids,” Kim said, storming toward the door to the
garage.
That got Kyle’s attention. “You better not. I have sole custody, and you aren’t
allowed any contact without a judge’s order or my permission.”
“You’d deny us that?” She scrunched her face in disbelief. “After all this
time, you’d deny my boys the chance to see me?”
Kyle wouldn’t even look at her. “Have your attorney call my attorney,” he
said flatly. “You knew the deal when you took the money.”
“What money?” she said, her tone icy and disgusted. “Do you know how
much rehab costs?”
I felt the tension in the arm Kyle had around me. I wrapped my arms around
his waist and pressed my cheek to his chest.
“It’s all right,” I whispered. “I’m here.”
I heard the sound of the door opening and closing, and then, silence.
Kyle exhaled deeply and leaned against the kitchen counter, looking shell-
shocked.
“Are you okay?” I asked him.
He shook his head. “I don’t . . . I can’t fucking believe she came back here.
For one point two million, I thought she’d be partying on some island for the
next several years.”
“You paid her more than a million dollars?”
“I had to.” He shrugged. “I had to buy out her equity in the house and my
retirement, plus a lump sum of alimony. It would have been two million, but
Reed got it down with a one-time cash payment up front.”
“Holy crap. That’s a hell of a lot of money.”
“I make good money. I’ll recover.”
“I know, but . . .” I looked up at the ceiling, feeling helpless. “I just don’t
understand how she can come back here and be so horrible to you after . . .
everything.”
 “That’s Kim. She lives in a world that revolves entirely around her.”
He pushed off the counter and walked across the room, hands locked behind
his neck again. “I don’t know how to handle this. The boys are finally in a good
place emotionally. She could ruin that so damn fast.”
“I’m so sorry.”
The doorbell sounded, and Kyle met my eyes across the room, looking
somber. “The cops.”
“Yeah.”
“I’m sorry about all this, Mer. You shouldn’t have to deal with any of it.”
I shook my head. “You shouldn’t, either. Let’s just take things one step at a
time, okay? First, the police report.”
He nodded and turned for the door, then looked at me over his shoulder.
“Will you call Reed and tell him I need him or Mason to go get the boys from
camp? I can’t risk her finding out they’re there and going to get them.”
“Sure.”
I took out my phone and looked up the number to Reed’s office. I already
knew this phone call wouldn’t be awkward at all. There were much more
important things at stake now.
Kyle
I’d never felt anger like this before. Though I hadn’t missed boxing much since
giving it up when I graduated medical school, it was all I wanted to do right now.
The urge to pound this rage out in a physical way, until I was too exhausted
to feel it anymore, was strong.
“Do you want me to go?” Meredith asked me.
I turned to her, and some of the anger softened. She was visibly shaken, her
brow creased and her arms crossed protectively over her chest. It was hard to
decide what had been the worst for her about the past hour—being seen naked
by my ex-wife while we were fucking, Kim’s bitchy comments toward her, or
our experience recounting the whole thing to the cops.
“No,” I said, putting my arms around her. “Not unless you want to go. I’m so
sorry, Mer.”
“It’s not your fault.”
I sighed heavily, wishing I were intuitive enough to read her state of mind
right now. “How are you feeling?”
“I don’t know. Still kind of shocked, I think. And just . . . I’ve got a sense of
dread.”
“She won’t come between us. I won’t let it happen.”
“But . . . what if she stays in Lovely? What will that mean for you? And for
the boys? What if she really doesn’t have any more money? Will you be okay
with that, if the boys know she’s got nothing?”
So many questions. And they were all swirling in my mind, too.
I turned around and resumed the pacing I’d been doing earlier around the
kitchen and living room.
“She has no legal claim to the boys,” I said, thinking out loud. “I have sole
custody, and I have to think that, given her history, no judge would let her
change that.”
 “What about visitation, though?”
“It’s at my discretion.”
She sat down on the edge of the couch, resting her elbows on her knees.
“Will you tell the boys she’s here?”
“I have to, yeah. I made a deal with them when she left that the three of us
would always be straight with each other.”
“They’ll want to see her.”
I stared up at the ceiling, the anger building back up inside me again. “I’ll
have to explain that it’s up to a judge to decide what’s best, I guess.”
“Do you think she had been drinking when she was here?”
I considered it, then shook my head. “I didn’t smell alcohol on her, and I
always could before. Her balance and speech were fine . . . She was probably
sober.”
“Then you might want to consider letting the boys see her for a supervised
visit.”
“Fuck that. She ditched out on them and broke their hearts. I’m not risking
it.”
Meredith’s hazel eyes were filled with the warmth and softness I loved about
her.
“I get that,” she said. “But Kyle, she’s their mom. That’s a powerful bond.
They talk to me about her occasionally, and it’s not always bad stuff they say.”
“They’ve got good hearts. They try to see the good in everyone.”
“Children love their parents, even when their parents make horrible choices
and hurt them.”
I shook my head. “She doesn’t deserve that.”
“I’m just saying . . . I know this is a curveball. She went about it the wrong
way, and she was a total bitch to us. But think about it from Jordan and Eric’s
perspective. You could ask one of your brothers to supervise a visit with her at
the park or something. I think seeing her sober and well, and knowing she cares
about them, would be good for the boys.”
I couldn’t argue with that. Every time I gave the boys coins to throw in the
new fountain in Lovely’s downtown square, they wished to see their mom. It
hurt me to hear their little voices yearning for something so simple. But it had
been out of reach for the past year.
“She’d have to submit to a breathalyzer first,” I said. “And ground rules like
no mention of you or me or the visit is over.”
She nodded. “That’s reasonable.”
The knowledge that Kim was in Lovely right now was keeping me tense and
edgy. My sons would be vulnerable to Kim once again.
My phone dinged with a text from Austin.
Austin: Reed had a meeting. I got the boys. We’re at my house.
Me: Can you guys keep them there this evening? I don’t want them here
if Kim comes back.
Austin: No problem. I’ll stay here just in case she comes looking.
Me: Thanks.
I looked up at Meredith. “Austin’s got the boys.”
Her shoulders relaxed with relief. “Good.”
“I need to hit the gym with Mason for a bit. Hit a heavy bag until I’m feeling
less homicidal.”
She got up from the couch. “Sure, that’s a good idea.”
“No, I want you to stay. We can spend the evening together when I get
back.”
She paused before responding. “I think I’m gonna go do my thing at home.”
An ominous feeling hit me right in the gut. “Why?”
“I just need some time to myself,” she said, shrugging.
She wouldn’t make eye contact with me.
“Did the things she said bother you?” I asked. “She’s vicious when she wants
to be. Please don’t listen to any of that shit.”
“No, I know.” She looked down at the floor.
“Then what?” I walked over to her and tipped her chin up so I could see her
eyes. “Tell me what’s bothering you.”
“I just need some time to process things, I think.”
 I put my hands on her shoulders. “Listen to me. I’m about to lose my shit
over her showing up in my house like that and being a bitch to you—and
dragging the kids back into her fucked-up orbit. And if she’s also made you feel
bad or unsure about things with us, I don’t think I can handle that. I need you to
know I’m with you. Completely with you.”
The corners of her lips tilted up slightly. “Kyle, it’s not that. And who knows
. . . maybe she’ll leave town tomorrow, and things can go back to the way they
were.”
“The way they are. She’s not changing a goddamn thing between you and
me.”
She put a palm on my chest. “I know we have crazy good sexual chemistry,
but we’re more than just that, aren’t we? You’re also my friend. That’s what you
need from me right now. Support, but also . . . space. So you can focus on this
stuff.”
“Shouldn’t I get to decide if I need space?”
“Well, I need some, too.”
“Fucking hell. ‘Space’ is code for ‘I’m getting the hell out of here.’”
Her eyes widened seriously. “Look, you may have some serious shit to
handle in the next few weeks. She could come back. You might need a
restraining order. Court dates over the kids if she won’t play nice.”
I rubbed my temple, my frustration at this situation growing by the minute.
“Yeah, I know, and I need you right now.”
“You’ve got me. But the conversations you need to have with the boys—it’s
not my place to be part of those. They need you fully focused on them.”
I nodded, a new sense of helplessness creeping in with the anger. Would
Meredith be here at the end of the latest Kim catastrophe? I wanted to believe
she would, but I couldn’t read the future.
My ex-wife was unbalanced and, apparently, on the warpath. I’d do
everything I could to shield Meredith from the fallout, but would it be enough?
Kim had taken a lot from me, bleeding me dry emotionally before our
divorce. There’d been times when I seriously thought getting sole custody of my
boys would require an amount of money that amounted to extortion. Once we
settled and she left, I’d finally reached a point where I thought she couldn’t take
anything from me ever again.
But now, with her return, I knew I’d been wrong. I faced losing Meredith, the
woman I’d fallen in love with. The woman my boys adored. She’d set me free in
so many ways, helping me see just how much I’d been missing until the day of
our first kiss.
“I don’t want to lose you,” I said to Meredith, pulling her close to me.
“Just take care of the boys and know that I’m here. I’m always here.”
I held her tight, taking in the scent of her sweet-smelling hair and the way
her breasts felt against my rib cage, warm and soft. She was as close as I’d ever
come to touching perfection.
There were many unknowns in my life right now, but I was sure of one thing
—losing her would break me in so many ways.
Meredith
The knock on my closed office door made me groan softly.
Really? I rarely closed my door and couldn’t believe whoever it was
wouldn’t get the hint and leave me alone. I couldn’t shake the sense of
melancholy I’d had since leaving Kyle’s three days earlier, and I just wanted to
avoid everyone.
I got up and opened it, expecting to see one of my coworkers. But it was a
uniformed deliveryman from a local flower shop.
“Meredith Hobbs?”
“That’s me.”
He handed me an enormous vase of red roses—two dozen of them mixed
with greenery and baby’s breath.
“Oh . . . thanks. Um, hang on.”
I took the vase and set it on my desk, then grabbed a few dollars from my
purse to tip him.
“Thanks,” he said, touching the tip of his cap before he left.
I closed the door again and went back to my desk chair. The flowers were
gorgeous, and I couldn’t help smiling as I looked at them. I plucked the card
from its holder and opened it.

Missing your beautiful smile.
-Kyle

It wasn’t just the message that made my heart flutter, but seeing his
signature. I knew his handwriting from seeing it on notes on his refrigerator.
He’d gone to the florist’s shop to send me these and had written that sweet
message himself.
I ran my fingertip over the letters in his name. Just seeing it and thinking it
made me a little swoony.
Kyle Lockhart had taken me completely by surprise. He had the most perfect
mix of effortless charm and sex appeal imaginable. The Lockhart brothers all
had the same tall, dark good looks, and they were very close, but they were all
different in personality.
The youngest, Justin, was ambitious and athletic. He’d gone to college on a
football scholarship and was expected to have his choice of law firms to work
for when he finished his post-law school internship in St. Louis.
Reed was quiet, warmhearted and easygoing. The kind of guy everyone
wanted to be friends with.
Austin was happy, always laughing. He ran a successful accounting business,
coached baseball, and was known as a devoted family man.
Mason was the cocky one—loaded with swagger and confidence. He was
also funny and a little intense at times.
And Kyle was a natural fit as the oldest. He was intelligent, but not just in
the cerebral, surgeon kind of way. He knew how to read people and was
measured and fair. His devotion to those he loved ran deep, and now I knew of
his commanding, sexy side. He put others first. Fierce when he needed to be, he
was most often strong in a quiet way. And the tenderness he kept locked inside
his heart, that few people ever got to see, made me ache with want for him.
I closed my eyes and breathed in the scent of the roses. The sadness
remained, though, because it was his warm, clean scent I wanted to be near right
now.
Would I have been better off if I’d never offered to help Jordan and Eric with
their homework? If I’d thanked Kyle for my test results on the phone that day
and gone back to my quiet, predictable life, I wouldn’t have cried myself to sleep
the past three nights.
If I’d never fallen for Kyle, I wouldn’t be pained by the thought of life
without him now. If I’d never gotten close to Jordan and Eric, I wouldn’t be
tearing up every time I looked at pictures of them on my phone.
I’d be the same Meredith I’d always been. That lonely, independent
daydreamer who ran from confrontation felt so far away now. In a month, I’d
come closer to the woman I truly wanted to be than I’d ever thought possible.
And it was my feelings for Kyle, Jordan, and Eric that had brought me here.
So no, I wouldn’t have traded it for anything. The pain was worth it, because I
knew it was possible for me to feel right with people. So many of the feelings
I’d felt in the past month—completely content, hopeful, protective, overjoyed,
sexy, and confident—were new for me.
Those feelings were so good. I didn’t want to lose them. I didn’t want to lose
Kyle, Jordan, and Eric.
I could never completely lose them—I knew that. In a way, they were all part
of me now. The valuable, intangible milestones we’d reached together would
always be real. But I sensed that things would never be the same. Kim wouldn’t
let us keep this happiness we’d found.
Kyle and I had been texting and talking on the phone, but I hadn’t seen him
since leaving his house three days ago, and he hadn’t pressed it. Between work,
making sure the boys were safe, talking to them about their mom being in
Lovely, and working out a meeting between them and her, he’d been busy.
These were the things I’d wanted to give him space for. But I missed him all
the same.
I picked up my phone and smiled at the picture on my home screen. It was a
selfie Kyle had taken of the two of us, his long arm able to capture it better than
I could have. He was standing behind me, an arm around my waist and his head
against mine. Taken last week, it made me remember the blissfulness I’d felt
before his ex-wife had walked in on us banging in his kitchen.
God, the horror was still a bit fresh. I’d been moaning like a porn star,
completely into the hard, passionate sex we were having. To know anyone had
witnessed something so intimate between the two of us was bad enough, but his
ex-wife? Ugh.
I slid my finger across the screen of my phone and texted Kyle.
Me: I got the flowers. They’re so beautiful. Thank you.
Kyle: You’re welcome. I’ll send flowers every day until I see you again.
Should have sent them the past three days, too.
 Me: You don’t need to do that.
Kyle: Either come see me, or clear lots of space on your desk.
Me: I miss you, you know I do. How are the boys?
Kyle: They’re good. Austin and Hannah are having Kim over to their
place tonight for a visit with the boys. We got the ground rules all
worked out.
Me: I’m so glad to hear that. The boys must be excited.
Kyle: They are. She’ll have some tough questions to answer, though.
Me: J & E deserve to ask those questions.
Kyle: Come over tonight. I need to see you.

Part of me wanted to. I missed him badly. But things were emotionally
intense right now, and I foresaw us having sex. It would either be the dirtiest,
most gratifying sex ever or the kind of slow, sensual sex that would leave me
bawling and professing my undying love for him.
It didn’t feel right to be doing that while Jordan and Eric were doing
something so big and important. Something that could leave them feeling
confused and hurt if Kim didn’t handle it well.
Me: I can’t.
Kyle: I’m going fucking crazy from not seeing you.
Me: No. We’d end up having sex.
Kyle: And that’s a bad thing? Are we not doing that anymore???
Me: Not tonight. I’ll be thinking about the boys. If it goes badly, they
could come home early. And you need to be fully clothed and ready to
comfort them.

Kyle: Okay, I agree. So no sex, then. I’ll make dinner and we’ll talk.
Me: Not tonight. The kids need just their dad tonight.
 Kyle: Then, when?
Me: Soon.
Kyle: Do you not want to be with me anymore?
Me: Stop jumping to conclusions. I’m crazy about you, and you know it.
Kyle: I’m meeting with Reed, Kim, and Kim’s attorney on Friday. I’ll
know a lot more after that.
Me: Good. Let me know how it goes.
Kyle: I have to go, I’m at work. But I need you to take a pic of yourself
right now and send it to me.
Me: Why??

Kyle: Just do it. Please.

I snapped a quick selfie and sent it, my expression awkward because smiling
felt wrong.
Kyle: Got it. Thanks.
Me: What was that about?
Kyle: Needed to see if you were still wearing the necklace. Talk later.
I set my phone on the desk and reached for the silver “M” pendant hanging
around my neck. Of course I was still wearing it.
There was another knock at my door, and I got up to answer it, hoping it
would be one of my less chatty coworkers.
But when I opened the door, it wasn’t one of my coworkers standing there. It
was Ivy Lockhart.
“Hi,” she said with a slight smile. “Do you have a minute? If not, I can come
back.”
It took me a few seconds to recover enough from the surprise to answer.
“No, come in. Of course. Come on in.”
 She smiled again and stepped inside.
Ivy was beautiful in a very rare way. She had perfect, fair skin, bright blue
eyes, and auburn hair that fell just past her shoulders. There was a warmth and
grace about her, though, that set her apart from the crowd.
“I feel bad that we’ve not officially met,” she said, sitting down in the chair
across from my desk. “I’m glad we can talk for a little bit, finally.”
“Me too.” I walked around to my side of the desk and sat in my chair.
“Would you like a drink? I’ve got a mini fridge.”
“I’m good, thanks.” She set her bag down beside the chair and rested a hand
on her belly.
She was pregnant. I sensed it immediately, but I made sure not to show any
reaction.
“Can we just decide here and now that things aren’t going to be awkward
between us?” she said. “I don’t want that.”
“No, I don’t either. I really appreciate you coming to see me.”
“I have a feeling you and I will get along well. I’m not the sort of woman
who resents the relationships Reed had before we even met. I’m secure in my
marriage, you know?”
I loved her. It wasn’t just the realization that she and I weren’t going to hate
each other, but genuine warmth and admiration.
“You should feel that way. Reed is head over heels for you. You know, I ran
into him at the grocery store once right after you guys got engaged, and I told
him how happy I was for you both. I wish I’d told you, too. I just didn’t know if
you’d want to hear it from me.”
“I understand.”
“I’ll say it now. I’m thrilled for you.”
She smiled. “Thanks.” She gestured at the enormous vase of flowers on the
corner of my desk. “From Kyle?”
I flushed a little. “Yes.”
“So pretty. It does my heart so good to see him feeling this way about you.”
Though I wanted to say something, nothing felt right. I just looked at Ivy
helplessly instead.
 “I know,” she said, nodding. “Things must be tough for you right now.”
“Not as tough as they are for him and the boys.”
“They’ll get through it. I’ve seen them pull together to get through worse,
you know. When Kim left . . .” She shook her head. “It was hard. Kyle was a
workaholic back then. He left most of the parenting to Kim and didn’t want to
see what everyone else was seeing when her drinking took a turn for the worse.”
“So his whole life changed when she left.”
“For the better,” Ivy said. “It was tough to watch the three of them trying to
find a new normal, but that normal is much healthier and happier for all of them.
Kyle rose to the occasion and became the father he was meant to be.”
Tears clouded my vision as I imagined him finding the strength to cut back
on work and be the one person in the world who would never let Jordan and Eric
down.
“Grace tried to step in,” Ivy said. “She told Kyle she’d take care of the boys
and the house for him. Actually, she insisted on it. Grace can be a little . . . much
on occasion, between you and me.”
I smiled and forced myself not to laugh. “Um . . . I won’t argue with that.”
“But Kyle refused. He wanted to do it all himself. And when he figured it out
. . .” Her expression softened. “It was something special to see. I used to be a
single mom, and I’ve got a soft spot for Kyle.”
“Believe me, I understand.”
Ivy sat forward in her chair. “You probably already know enough about his
marriage to Kim. She wasn’t a good wife in any way.”
“Did you hear what happened?” I asked, my cheeks warming.
“When?”
“How Kyle found out she was back?”
She shook her head.
I arched my brows and dove right in. “We were . . . Well, there’s no delicate
way to say it. I was bent over his kitchen island, if you know what I mean.”
Her mouth formed an “O” of amusement.
“Yeah.” I smiled.
“And she just walked in his house and . . . ?”
 “Yeah . . . walked in and screamed at him and then at me. About how she’s
been sick, wants her family back, is broke . . . yada, yada, yada.”
“Ouch.”
“It was pretty awful.”
“Well, they’ve been divorced for almost a year, so she’s delusional for saying
she wants her family back. That’s over.”
I nodded. “But she’s still Jordan and Eric’s mom.”
“She is. And when I heard it was you who encouraged Kyle to let her see the
boys, with ground rules, well . . . that’s what made me come here to see you.”
“You think that was a bad idea?”
She smiled. “No. I think you’re pretty amazing. You put Jordan and Eric’s
needs first and might have been the only person who could convince Kyle it was
the right call. I spend time with the boys, and I know they miss their mom.
Flawed as she is, they love her.”
“That’s nice of you to say about me. It’s nice to know you agree, too. I’m
worried about how it will go when they see her.”
“I need to tell you something, and it may sound more blunt and intrusive
than I intend it to.”
“It’s okay,” I said. “Go ahead.”
“Kyle asked me and Reed to come over yesterday evening. The boys were
out back swimming. That was when he told us about you convincing him to let
Kim see the kids. He looked like hell.”
I sighed sadly. “He has to be a wreck, worrying about what will happen with
the boys.”
“He’s a wreck because he’s worried about what will happen with you.”
“You think?”
“I know. He wanted to ask Reed if he had any insight into how you might be
feeling right now.”
“Oh. Well, that’s . . . unexpected. We’ve hardly spoken in the past eight
years.”
“Kyle’s pretty desperate. And I came here to see if his suspicions are right.
Are you backing away from him because of Kim?”
 I looked down at my lap. “It’s not because of her, exactly. It’s because I think
he needs space to deal with this Kim stuff.”
“He’s got an outstanding attorney to handle the Kim stuff.”
I smiled at that. “He does. I just . . . don’t know where I fit in now, you
know? Grace just agreed to tolerate me like five minutes ago, and then Kim
comes rolling into town with her claws out. And Kyle and I are still a new
thing.”
“What do you want your place to be with him?”
I took a deep breath and let it out, considering. “I knew what I wanted before
she got here. It was what we already had. I wanted to be close to him and the
boys and hope that maybe . . . one day, he could love me.”
My pulse raced as I admitted it. I wanted that more than anything.
“And now what do you want your place to be?” Ivy asked me.
“I guess I don’t know what the options are. Is Kim staying here? Because if
so, I don’t want it to seem like I’m competing for the boys’ affections.”
“If she stays here, which is a big if, the best she can hope for is supervised
visitation that one day becomes unsupervised. Kyle is very, very unlikely to be
forced to share custody with her.”
I nodded. “That’s good to know.”
She smiled. “Okay, we’ve arrived at the blunt part I mentioned. Do you love
Kyle?”
My instinct was to deflect or to offer a half answer because of the part of me
that still feared rejection. But there was something so genuine about Ivy that I
decided to just be honest.
“Yes.”
“Then don’t run. He needs you more than ever. That man has never had a
woman love him unconditionally. Go over there and tell him that ten thousand
rabid ex-wives wouldn’t keep you away from him.”
“He’s worried I’ll run out on him like I did Reed,” I said, sighing. “But that
was so different.”
“It’s not just your history, but also his. He’s only had a woman who set
conditions for everything. He wanted to stay in Lovely, she wanted to move to
California. So she made building that house a condition of staying here. If he
wanted sex, she wanted plastic surgery.”
I cringed. Poor Kyle.
“You get my drift,” she said. “Don’t do this. Don’t tell him you’ll be back if
things go a certain way. None of this is his fault.”
“You’re right.”
“I agree about you easing back on the boys right now, but not Kyle. I am
begging you to go tell that man you’re sticking.” She furrowed her brow. “I
mean, if you’re absolutely sure you are.”
I laughed at her expression. “I’m absolutely sure. I just wasn’t seeing things
the right way, but I am now.”
She breathed out what looked like a sigh of relief and stood up.
“Thank you,” I said, getting up from my chair and walking around the desk
to hug her. “You’re every bit as amazing as everyone says.”
She laughed and rubbed a hand across my back. “That’s sweet of you.”
“I’ll go see him . . . soon. Very soon. I think he may have a lot on his mind
tonight with the boys seeing Kim, and this conversation needs to be in person.
So tomorrow.”
“Good. And can we keep this conversation just between us?”
I nodded. “Absolutely. Thank you again.”
She reached for the door handle and then turned to look at me over her
shoulder.
“So we’re friends now, right?”
“I hope so,” I said.
“Good.”
I held the door as she walked out, slinging her big bag over her shoulder and
waving at me.
I’d owned my past for so long now. It was finally time for me to own my
future.
Kyle
I cranked up the speed on the treadmill in my home gym, pumping my legs as I
broke into a sprint. I was already drenched with sweat from lifting weights, but I
still had lots of pent-up energy to burn off.
The boys had been at Austin’s for their visit with Kim for a little over two
hours. I knew that must mean it was going okay, but I wouldn’t breathe easy
until they got home and I could talk to them about it.
I’d been hoping Meredith would change her mind about coming over
tonight, but she hadn’t shown up. The only one here besides me was Mason, who
was putting the finishing touches on the security system he was installing for me.
No one would be able to walk into my home unannounced ever again. In the
few days I’d had to think about Kim coming back, I’d realized that if Stephanie
had been over here babysitting when Kim had shown up, Kim probably could
have taken the boys, convincing them—and Stephanie—that it was for a quick
joyride. I wouldn’t have put anything past her at this point, and I couldn’t risk
my boys’ safety.
A closely supervised visit was one thing, but Kim being alone with them was
another.
At the sound of running footsteps on the floor above me, I turned off the
treadmill and ran upstairs from the basement.
“Where’s Hagrid?” Eric asked, looking around the kitchen.
“He’s outside,” I answered, still breathing heavily from sprinting.
“We made homemade dog treats with Mom and Aunt Hannah,” he said,
heading for the door with a handful. “I want to give Hagrid some.”
Jordan was getting a bottle of water from the fridge.
“Hey, J, how’d it go?”
He shrugged. “It was okay.”
“Was it good to see her?”
 “Yeah. She’s not drinking anymore.”
I hoped to hell that would stick.
“Good for her,” I said, leaning against the kitchen counter.
Austin walked into the room, and Jordan left, probably to play video games.
“Hey,” I said to Austin. “You want a drink?”
“You got a beer?”
“Nope. Water and juice boxes.”
He grinned. “Water’s good.”
“So, it went okay?” I asked him.
“Yeah. It was good. Hannah thought it might break the ice if she had
something for them to do together, so they made dog treats. I just stayed in the
other room with Alana.”
“Kim didn’t mention anything she wasn’t supposed to?”
“No. She stuck to the boys.”
I nodded, relieved but still wondering what would happen next.
“Did she say anything about leaving?” I asked.
“No. She’s staying with a friend. That’s about all she said.”
“Thanks for doing this. Tell Hannah thanks, too.”
He waved dismissively. “We were glad to. Anytime. You need anything
else?”
“I don’t think so.”
“Okay. I’m taking off, then.”
Eric came back inside and searched the pantry for a snack. He and Jordan
were eating cheese crackers and watching cartoons in the living room when I
went in there a few minutes later.
“Do you guys feel like talking about seeing your mom?” I asked them.
“What about it?” Jordan said.
“You know, just . . . how it went and how you’re feeling.”
“It was fine,” he said.
“I’m gonna make her a picture,” Eric said. “She said she wants me to draw
her a rainbow with a pot of gold.”
“Okay, that sounds good.”
 I’d been prepared for tears and anger, but not this. It had thrown me for a
loop.
“So if you feel like you need to talk . . . about anything, anytime, you guys
know I’m here, right?”
“Yeah,” Jordan said absently, more focused on Tom and Jerry than me.
“I’m gonna go take a shower,” I said. “Uncle Mason’s around here
somewhere working on the security system.”
I picked up my phone from the kitchen counter and texted Meredith on the
way to the bathroom.
Me: The boys said they had a good visit with their mom. Austin said
there were no issues.
Meredith: So glad to hear that.

Me: I’m relieved. What are you up to?

Meredith: Baking. Always a great idea when it’s ninety degrees outside,
right?
Me: What are you baking?
Meredith: Banana bread and cookies.
Me: Just a reminder that I really like banana bread and cookies.

Meredith: I’ll have to bring some over, then.

Me: I hope so.
Meredith: Get some sleep tonight. You must be exhausted.
I realized she was right—I was.
Me: I will. Talk soon.
Meredith: Goodnight.

The next morning, I dropped the boys off at Reed and Ivy’s house to spend
the day with Ivy. I’d given Stephanie the day off of babysitting because I still
wasn’t sure what Kim might do.
After stopping by the floral shop to order Meredith’s flowers, I went to the
hospital for a full morning of surgeries.
I felt slightly back in the swing of things since the boys were doing well. But
I was still unsettled over Meredith.
I needed to convince her that not only did I have room in my life to handle
work, the boys, the Kim situation, and my relationship with her—I needed it.
Spending time with her every day was important to me, even on the days it was
just a few minutes.
There was a medical student scrubbed in to help with my surgeries today,
though she was only observing. Explaining things and doing some stuff more
slowly to demonstrate for her put me slightly behind, and it was nearly one p.m.
when I left the hospital’s main operating room for the final time.
My afternoon office appointments didn’t start until two, so I had time to grab
lunch. I checked my phone, hoping for a text from Meredith that she’d gotten the
flowers, but there wasn’t one.
When I pushed open the double doors that led to the elevators, Meredith was
standing near the wall.
“Hey,” she said, her smile a little shy.
“Hey.” Grinning, I pulled off my surgical cap and scooped her into my arms.
“You’re a sight for sore eyes.”
I lifted her feet from the ground and gave her a little spin. She wrapped her
arms around my shoulders and hugged me tightly, letting out a small squeal.
“Thanks for the flowers,” she said in my ear.
“You’re welcome. I would’ve sent them every day until I saw you, but this is
much better.”
I set her feet back on the floor, and she looked up at me.
“Did you just drop by to say hi, or do you have time for a quick lunch?” I
asked her.
“Actually, I was . . . watching you.”
“Watching me?”
She nodded. “From the window you can watch surgeries from.”
 “I didn’t see you.”
“Well, it’s so high up, and I was standing in the back of the booth . . . or
whatever you call that place.” She tucked her hair behind her ears and smiled
nervously. “I just wanted to see you doing what you do, if that makes sense.”
“That means a lot. Most people can’t stomach watching surgery.”
“I guess I just want to know everything about you. What you do and how
you do it. Because . . . I think I might love you.”
My lips parted with surprise, and my heart felt like it might jump out of my
chest.
“Meredith—”
“Sorry.” She closed her eyes, her cheeks reddening. “I didn’t mean to just—”
The double doors flew open, and two nurses walked out, both laughing.
“Hey, Dr. Lockhart, are you coming down for lunch?” one of them asked me.
I shook my head at him and turned back to Meredith.
“I think I love you, too.” I reached for her hand and brought it to my lips,
kissing her knuckles. “Actually, I know I do.”
She smiled, her eyes sparkling with happiness. “I had to come here to tell
you that, and to say that I’m sticking.”
“Sticking?” I arched my brows with curiosity.
“Not running. Not even easing slightly away to give you space. I want to be
as much a part of your and the boys’ lives as you want me to be.”
I pulled her back into my arms and lifted her up again, kissing her and then
spinning her around again. She cupped my cheeks, giving me the smile that lit
up my whole world.
“I want you to be a very big part of our lives,” I said. “I can’t be impulsive
and get married right away or anything because of the boys—”
“Oh no, I’m not asking you to.” She put her fingertips over my lips, her eyes
wide. “I just want to be with you.”
“I’ll want to get married at some point, though,” I said against her fingers.
She whipped her hand away from my mouth. “What did you say?”
“I’ll want to. A real wedding, not some bullshit tiny one since I’m divorced.
With the boys in it.”
 Her eyes filled with tears. “I could definitely do that.”
“And we can have more kids.”
“You . . . Really? You’re sure?”
I nodded and set her feet back on the ground. “When we get there. I need
more time than a guy without kids might, but I want you to know I’m all in. I
want us to have it all—together.”
Tears fell onto her cheeks, and she wiped them away. “I never thought any of
this would happen for me. I mean, I love the boys so much already, but more . . .
I’ve always wanted a big family.”
“I’d like that, too.”
I kissed her again, then pulled back, remembering the worry that had been
dogging me for days. “So Kim might try to cause problems for us, and I don’t
want that to scare you away.”
“Don’t worry about that. I’ve waited too long to feel this way about
someone, and I’m here to stay. I’ve waited my whole life, really.”
“Me too.”
“And I’m sticking.”
“So am I.” I nodded toward the hallway that led to the elevators. “I wish I
could take the afternoon off to be with you, but I can’t. Can I interest you in a
lunch date in the hospital cafeteria?”
“Sounds kind of perfect, actually.”
I took her hand and led her down the hallway.
Karma had come through in a very big way for me today. But then, I was
pretty overdue for that in the love department.
Meredith
The morning of April and Mason’s wedding, Kyle woke me up early for our
first-ever morning-sex session.
His hair was a mess and dark stubble coated his face—a look I found very
sexy.
“You’re gonna make me come,” he said, his face a few inches from mine as
he fucked me slow and deep.
“How?” I said breathlessly.
“That shit with your hips. Fuck.”
I was on my back in his king-size bed, my arms pinned above my head by
one of his hands and his other arm hooked beneath my knee.
“Come, then,” I said, arching my back to take him just a little deeper.
“You first.” His voice was strained as he dipped his head to close his lips
around my nipple.
That did it. I cried out and locked my legs around his waist as I came, and
with just a few more thrusts, he did the same, saying my name in a deep,
satisfied tone that made my toes curl.
The sound of movement in the room made us both turn toward the door. The
boys had spent the night at their grandparents’ house so they could help with
wedding preparations last night and this morning.
Hagrid was prancing into the room, tongue out.
“What’s he doing out of his kennel?” Kyle said.
“I let him out after he went outside early this morning.”
His lips curved into a grin. “Which must have been when you brushed your
teeth.”
“I’m not ready for you to experience my morning breath yet.”
He got on his side, his head propped up by his hand and his elbow on the
bed. “Okay, but I honestly don’t care, Mer.”
 Looking over at the clock, he groaned. “I’ve got to get in the shower.”
“You’re the best man,” I said, smiling with excitement. “But I already knew
that.”
He kissed me and pushed himself up out of bed. “You gonna join me?”
“I could be persuaded to.”
He bent down to the bed and scooped me into his arms. “I can be
persuasive.”
“You definitely can,” I said, laughing.
I’d never showered with a man before, and it ended up being surprisingly
intimate. Washing each other was sensual and relaxing at the same time.
Shower sex wasn’t an option, because Kyle had to get dressed and we had to
get to his parents’ house for the wedding.
When he walked out of his walk-in closet dressed in his tux, I felt a swirl of
excitement in my belly. One day, he would look just like this on the day we got
married. I believed that in my heart. I didn’t care how long it took—just having
him and the promise of something more was enough.
“You look great,” he said when he saw me, his brows arched as he nodded
his approval.
I’d decided to wear a simple, sleeveless, blue wrap dress, leaving my hair
down and accessorizing with silver bangle bracelets and, of course, my necklace
from Kyle.
“Thanks,” I said, sitting on the bed and bending down to fasten the straps on
my sandals. “And can I just tell you how nice it is for a tall girl like me to be
able to wear heels and still not be taller than her man?”
“I love your long legs,” he said, eyeing them from the doorway of the
bedroom.
“You’re full of compliments today,” I said, standing up.
He reached for my hand, and we headed for the garage, making a quick stop
for my bag in the kitchen.
Henry and Grace’s home was bustling with florists and caterers when we
walked in. Jordan and Eric were sampling the food with Mason, all of them
being swatted away by Grace.
 “Meredith,” she said as soon as Kyle and I walked into the room. “Hi. We’re
glad you’re here to celebrate with us. You look lovely.”
“Thank you. Is there anything I can do to help?”
She hesitated. “Would you mind running out to get some ice?”
“Sure, no problem.”
We all busied ourselves in preparations, and the morning flew by. Jordan and
Eric were handsome in their suits, if not also a little grumbly about how sweaty
they were. I sat in the middle of them in the second row of chairs set up in Henry
and Grace’s backyard for the ceremony.
April was radiant. As soon as she started approaching in her halter-neck
gown, Mason’s swagger was nowhere to be found as he cried openly. The sight
of him made me tear up.
“Why’s everyone cryin’?” Eric asked me, looking puzzled.
“It’s just a wedding thing,” I whispered. “It’s a happy day.”
“I don’t cry when I’m happy.”
“Let’s watch, okay?”
Kyle looked strong, proud, and content as he watched his brother exchange
vows with April.
The attorneys had worked out an agreement for Kim to see the boys twice a
week, for two hours at a time, under the supervision of a Lockhart family
member for the next month. She apparently hoped to stay here and had eaten the
giant slice of humble pie required to see the boys, apologizing for her behavior
at Kyle’s house and agreeing in writing that it would never happen again.
We didn’t know if she’d remain sober, but a counselor at the treatment center
she’d been an inpatient at had confirmed to Reed that she’d completed a six-
month program there. That was a start.
After the ceremony, April changed into an ivory, knee-length dress for the
reception. There were a few tables set up in the yard, all decked out with
beautiful, tropical flower centerpieces.
Kyle, Jordan, Eric, and I sat at a table with Reed, Ivy, and their son, Noah.
They’d announced her pregnancy, and Noah was giddy with excitement over
being a big brother. They made a beautiful family.
 I met Reed’s eyes across the table briefly, and a moment of understanding
passed between us. This was how it was always meant to be, though there was a
time when neither of us knew that.
“Meredith, I love your necklace,” Ivy said as we finished our dinner of
grilled salmon, potatoes, and asparagus. “It really fits you.”
“Thank you.” I reached for the “M” pendant and ran my fingertips over it.
“I recognize that necklace,” Reed said, shaking his head. “Kyle made us stop
by a jewelry store in St. Louis on the way to the airport to go to Montana. He
took so long picking it out that we almost missed our flight.”
“But we didn’t,” Kyle said, putting his hand on top of mine on the table and
brushing his thumb across my knuckles. “It all worked out.”
“It all worked out,” Reed agreed.
“I think she thinks the ‘M’ stands for Meredith, though,” Kyle said, looking
at me.
I furrowed my brow. “It doesn’t?”
“No.” His eyes sparkled warmly as he smiled at me.
“What does it stand for, then?”
“Mine.”

BRENDA ROTHERT LIVES IN CENTRAL Illinois with her husband and three
sons. She was a daily print journalist for nine years, during which time she
enjoyed writing a wide range of stories.
These days Brenda writes New Adult Romance in the Contemporary and
Dystopian genres. She loves to hear from readers.
Visit Brenda Rothert at www.brendarothert.com.

Thanks for reading Drawn Deeper! If you enjoyed Kyle and Meredith’s
story, I’d greatly appreciate a review on the site you purchased it from.
The next book in the Lockhart Brothers series, Hidden Depth, will release in
the first half of 2017.
If you’re on Facebook, I’d love to have you in my group Rothert’s Readers,
where I share the latest on my work and do special giveaways.
Would you like to know when my next book is available? You can sign up
for my new release e-mail list at Newsletter or like my Facebook page at
Facebook.

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My village went above and beyond to help me get this book written. I truly
couldn’t have done it without them.
Beta readers Janett Gomez, Michelle Tan, Chelle Northcutt and Chantal
Gemperle were with me every step of the way. I’m so grateful for their support
and encouragement.
Editor Lisa Hollett and copy editor Taylor Bellitto put the polish on this
story. I am so fortunate to work with them and I know my books are much better
because of their expertise.
Others I’m lucky to have in my corner are Denise Milano Sprung, publicist
Jessica Estep of Inkslinger PR, my assistant Pam Million, formatter and interior
designer Christine Borgford of Perfectly Publishable and cover designer Regina
Wamba.
My Facebook reader group, Rothert’s Readers, has also been more
supportive and encouraging than I can say.
To every reader who has stuck with me on the Lockhart Brothers series, even
though there was a fourteen-month gap between the release of In Deep and
Drawn Deeper, thank you. I can’t tell you what it means that with all the books
out there, the Lockhart Brothers have stayed on your minds and in your hearts
for this long. I promise the wait for the next book will be much shorter.