Resumen Carta Cruzadas

the holdup
 Part 1 is called "the message" (Zusak has some real beef with capitalization in
this book), and it opens in the middle of a bank robbery that isn't exactly going as
planned. It's got all the right ingredients: a gunman, a crowd of scared people,
and a nervous robber… but the robber's a little pathetic.
 Ed and his friends, Marv, Audrey, and Ritchie are all there, waiting for the
gunman to do his thing.
 Their biggest concern? Marv is worried about getting a ticket because he's
parked in a fifteen-minute zone. That wouldn't exactly be at the top of our list if
we were in a bank when it was robbed, but to each his own we guess.
 Ed and Marv start arguing about the car. Ed's all your car stinks, man and Marv
just can't take it. So what if it's older than he is? Nobody disses his blue Falcon.
 Naturally the gunman gets annoyed with all the arguing in the corner—he's
nervous it's about the robbery—so he tells them to shut it.
 Robber dude has got the money and is making a run for it, but just then he
notices his getaway car pulling away… without him. So he turns to Ed and Marv.
Since they were being real wise guys before, he decides to take their car.
 Marv is more than a little upset about this—that car's his baby, after all—but what
choice does he have? He hands over the keys, and the robber's on the move.
 Here the thing: Marv's car is actually really old and rundown. So the robber tries
to start it again and again… and again…but no dice.
 At this point, he's dropped the gun and can't get the car to start. So Ed gets up
from the bank floor and goes after him. Wait, what?
 Ed's no hero or anything. He just decides to do something instead of sitting
around, though he can't explain why.
 Ed fires the gun, but winds up shooting Marv's car by accident; needless to say,
his buddy is definitely not happy about this.
 The cops show up, arrest the bank robber, and Ed is declared a local hero. The
only thing Marv cares about, though, is the fact that his car is more ruined than it
already was.
 Then Ed tells us he gets a message that changes everything. We don't learn
anything more about it, but boy are we interested.

sex should be like math: an introduction to my life

 We get to know Ed Kennedy a little better, and his life can pretty much be
summed up like this: he plays cards with his friends. Riveting stuff, isn't it?
 His closest pal is Marv, who is a Chatty—and argumentative—Kathy. Then
there's quiet, beer-drinking, boyish Ritchie. And finally, blonde bombshell Audrey,
who Ed is totally head over heels for, rounds out the group.
 Ed's a nineteen-year-old cabdriver with no real hope for achieving much in his
life. He needs a little R-E-S-P-E-C-T, but isn't getting it from anyone in his town.
  He lives on the outskirts of a small town in a shack with his dog, the Doorman, a
German Shepherd who is practically as old as he is (seventeen) and doesn't like
anyone. He also smells. A lot.
 We find out the dog used to be Ed's dad's before he died six months ago from
drinking too much.
 Then Ed tells us a little about his family. There's his tougher-than-tough mom, his
over-achieving younger brother, Tommy, who's studying to be a lawyer, his sister
Leigh, and his other sister Katherine, who left home at seventeen because she
got pregnant. His whole fam is in a picture on top of his television, and
sometimes he just watches the picture instead of TV.
 Ed holds nothing back. He shares with us that he's bad in bed, something he's
not embarrassed about and thinks people should be able to admit, like being bad
at math. Yet he knows he can't go around telling people he's no good because
he's a guy.
 It doesn't really matter much, because the girl he loves isn't jumping in to bed
with him anytime soon. Though Audrey does come over sometimes and watch
movies with Ed. They snuggle under a blanket, and sometimes she even spends
the night, but nothing ever happens between them.
 She's from a family that beat each other up, so she's been hurt in the past, and
won't let it happen again. Ed loves her and wants to protect her.

the ace of diamonds

 Ed and his buddies all get together to play cards. There's some talk of his fifteen
minutes of fame in the newspaper as a hero, but mostly they just hang out.
 Then it happens. It's a Tuesday night, and Ed gets the mail just like any night.
But when he opens it, he sees an Ace of Diamonds with a cryptic message: "45
Edgar Street, midnight. 13 Harrison Avenue, 6 p.m. 6 Macedoni Street, 5: 30
a.m."
 Hmm… he's not really sure what this means, or who would send him such a
thing, so Ed calls his friends and mom to check if it's from them.
 It's not. Plus he forgot to pick up a coffee table for his mom like he promised, so
she gives him a good tongue-lashing and tells him he's an idiot (along with some
other choice words to boot). He promises he'll pick it up for her tomorrow.
 Ed plays cards with his friends again, and they all talk about the ace he got in the
mail. Audrey thinks it's connected to the bank robbery, and though Ed's not so
sure, he definitely wants to find out.
 He imagines himself being on the brink of something special. He's not sure what,
but he thinks this card might be important.
 Who is he kidding? He tells himself to stop dreaming and get over it.

the judge and the mirror

 It looks like the bank robbery will come back to bite him—Ed's summoned to the
court to testify about what happened.
  He's a smart aleck with the judge and takes a few (verbal) jabs at the robber
while he can; the judge tells him to check himself before he wrecks himself
(though not in those exact words).
 After he's finished giving his testimony, Ed starts walking away, when the robber
calls out to him.
 "You're a dead man," the guy tells him. Gulp.
 Don't worry about that guy, the policewoman tells Ed… but he's not so sure.

watching, waiting, raping

 Ed keeps the whole robber-threatening-him thing under wraps; the guy only got
six months in jail, so he doesn't really want to think about it too much.
 Now back to the Ace of Diamonds. Ed's decided to give this thing a go by
checking out the first address—but when he goes to visit Edgar Street, he
chickens out.
 Finally Ed makes it there two nights later. It's in a not-so-nice part of town that Ed
only knows about because Marv used to date a chick named Suzanne Boyd
here.
 Ed gets to the house just in time to see a large drunk guy yelling at his wife. Then
he rapes her. As the wife screams out in pain, Ed realizes he's been sent to care
about this poor woman.
 A little girl is on the porch crying. Can you blame her? Ed watches as she waits
for her mom to stop screaming out and then she goes back inside. Ugh.
 Ed feels for the girl and her mom, and he wants to help, but he's too afraid—the
guy is huge, after all. So Ed leaves, but he knows he's got to take care of the
guy.

pieces
 After discovering the rape on Edgar Street, Ed's not so sure he likes the
messages on this card he's been sent. He tells no one what he saw.
 One day at work, Audrey tells Ed to be careful; her words stay with him after they
go off to drive their cabs.
 He wonders if the other addresses will be like the first one and, understandably,
hopes not.
 Ed's out shopping when he hears the voice of a mom talking to her child—it stops
Ed dead in his tracks. It's the woman from Edgar Street.
 He asks the little girl if she's okay, and she lies that she is.
 Ed promises to do something about their terrible situation. Cue dramatic music.

harrison avenue
 Ed chickens out again on Edgar Street. He's not sure what he can do, so he tells
himself it will all work out even though he knows he's lying.
  There are still two more addresses on the card, so he decides he'll go to the next
one, and talks to the Doorman to build himself up.
 While playing cards with his friends over at Audrey's, he imagines being with
Audrey. He doesn't just want to take her to bed, though—he also wants her to
want him. Aw. But that's not going to happen.
 Marv asks Ed what happened with the Ace of Diamonds, and Ed tells them he
threw it away. Sure ya did, buddy.
 Next up: 13 Harrison Avenue. Ed's a little scared to check this one out, but he's
relieved when he gets there—it's just some old lady in her house.
 She closes the curtains. She drinks tea. She's not even remotely threatening like
the other house was. But she sure is lonely.
 For something different, Ed plays cards with his friends again. He's feeling pretty
confident about the Ace of Diamonds now.
 Ed goes to the Cheesecake Shop to get a cake to take over to the old lady. He
bumps into the girl who worked behind the counter during the bank robbery;
apparently she quit the bank and now works here. The two chit-chat for a bit, and
then Ed is off.
 He arrives at the old lady's house and isn't quite sure what to expect—so when
she calls him Jimmy and invites him in for dinner, he just goes with it.
 Let's face it: Ed's not really sure who this guy is, or what the story is, but he
wants to comfort the old lady. It turns out her name is Milla Johnson, and she
sure misses Jimmy.
 Ed plays along and promises to come back; when he gets home, he and the
Doorman have a coffee and Ed calls himself Jimmy too.
 He laughs and feels good about himself… or about being a messenger, we
should say.

being jimmy
 Everyone should visit dear old mom once in a while, so Ed goes round to her
place. His mom has been working hard at the gas station, and is expecting
company soon.
 Plus she's returned the coffee table Ed brought over. Uh… Ed's a little annoyed
because she gave him a hard time about that, but his bro Tommy told his ma (as
he calls her) that she should get a cedar table instead. They're way better than
pine.
 Ed offers to get his ma stuff at the store, but she tells him he's no use when it
comes to delivering stuff (or anything else in life, she seems to say).
 He gets lost and tells us he likes being Jimmy instead of Ed.
 Over at Milla's place, Ed reads Wuthering Heights to her and notices a note in it
from Jimmy. It's from way back in 1941 and says, "my soul needs yours." Wow.
No wonder Milla misses Jimmy—theirs was the truest love.
 Milla gives Ed a slice of cake, and he's content there, playing Jimmy.
 Back at home, Ed gets a strange phone call, asking for Jimmy. It creeps him out
(us, too), but he decides to find out a little more about this Jimmy guy. His first
 stop? The cemetery. Ed searches the gravestones and asks the security guard
for help.
 When he comes to the grave, what he discovers majorly bums him out: Jimmy
died sixty years ago, which means poor Milla has been alone all that time.
 She's not alone now that she has Jimmy, er, Ed in her life, though.

the barefoot girl

 Ed loves Milla and Jimmy, but he also knows there's another address on the
card: 6 Macedoni Street, 5: 30 a.m.
 He waits there and sees a fifteen-year-old girl running. Ed's confused. This girl
doesn't need money, or a friend, so why exactly has he been sent there?
 He keeps watching her run in hopes of finding out, but he's no good at hiding in
the shadows and the girl sees him and says hello. She recognizes Ed from the
paper.
 They exchange some small talk, and Ed finds out her name is Sophie; then the
girl keeps on running because that's all she wants to do.
 Ed keeps going there in the mornings before work to watch her run, and even
watches her meets on weekends. Her family shows up then too.
 During her race, Sophie runs and runs, but she loses. Her dad watches intently
and is super disappointed when she doesn't finish first.
 Ed feels bad for Sophie as he watches her with her parents after the race. He
notices her shoes are all old and worn and thinks she deserves better.

the shoe box

 Ed and Audrey sit on his front porch, drinking and talking. Audrey asks about the
card Ed got in the mail, knowing he didn't toss like he said he did.
 She wonders if he will get more, but Ed brushes it off—he's still on the first one,
and they're a lot of work anyway.
 He still goes around to Milla's to read to her, and he's been watching Sophie run
in her busted up shoes.
 Ed decides to go over to Sophie's place with a gift for her. When her dad
answers to the door, Ed gives it to him, and tells the guy it's for Sophie. It's kinda
random, but he goes with it.
 It's new shoes for her… except when the guy opens the box to check out the new
kicks, it's completely empty. Huh?
 Sophie's dad isn't really sure what's happening, but we guess he delivers the gift
(of nothing) to Sophie, because the next time we see her she's barefoot on the
track.
 She's racing again, but this time it's different. She's passionate, rough, and
strong; everyone stops to watch her run.
 Even though the other girl wins the race, everyone claps for Sophie.

Janother stupid human

  Sophie's got blood on her knees and no shoes on, but she's wearing a smile.
 She goes over to thank Ed for his help, and asks if she'll see him again. At
5:30am, that's a negative.
 Then she asks Ed if he's a saint. He's never heard that before, and he tells her
he's "just another stupid human."
 She smiles and walks away.

edgar street revisited

 Ed wakes up and all he can think about are the three addresses on the card.
He's taken care of Milla and Sophie… Now it's time to handle things at Edgar
Street.
 He watches television and plays cards with his friends to pass the time.
 He's already had success with two out of three of the addresses, so he figures
he'll be able to help out with Edgar Street too.
 But when Ed gets there, he's scared. The man starts raping his wife again, but
this time Ed moves forward, into the house.
 He sees the little girl he saw at the store, and she tells him her name's Angelina.
When Ed tells her he's there to save her, she asks if he can. Ouch.
 Angelina prompts Ed to go into the room where her parents are, but Ed stops
cold in his tracks—he wants to go in, he really does, but he's scared out of his
mind. What would he even do? He says goodbye to the little girl and leaves.
 Ring, ring. When Ed gets home, he gets a call telling him to check his mailbox.
There's a gun inside. Dun dun dun…

murder at the cathedral

 Ed stares at the gun and wonders how he ended up here. He's no hero—he's
just a cab driver for crying out loud—but now he's got a loaded gun with only one
bullet meant for you-know-who.
 Why him? And more importantly, what's he going to do about this?
 He comes up with a plan, but as usual, we're in the dark about it. Step 1: He asks
his boss if he can borrow the cab that evening. He isn't allowed to take it home,
so he wants to get permission.
 His boss seems like a jerk, but he lets Ed take the car this one time only.
 Ed doesn't play cards with his friends that night, and neither does Audrey since
she's got a hot date with some random from work.
 Marv calls to check on Ed, since he didn't show up to the game; he also wants to
make sure Ed's in for the Annual Sledge Game before Christmas. It's a big
soccer game that Marv really wants them to play in, so Ed agrees.
 Now it's time for Step 2 of Ed's plan: He drives by the drunk husband, and offers
him a ride home, on the house. The guy agrees.
 Ed takes him somewhere remote and hits him with the gun; when the guy comes
to, Ed's standing over him, pointing the guy right at his eyes.
 "Here's how it's gonna work: you're gonna do as I say, or else," Ed tells him.
  Ed wants to know what to do. What would you do if you were in this situation? No
really, Ed asks us that.
 Since we're not there to actually help him though, Ed keeps holding the gun at
the guy's face. He makes the guy admit that he rapes his wife every night, and
then he tells the guy that right now he's as scared as his wife is every night.
 Ed keeps holding the gun, and then he pulls the trigger.

aftermath
 Welcome to Part 2, a.k.a. 'The Stones of Home"—a section which Zusak has
deemed merits capitalization.
 Ed thinks about the man's body hitting the ground and the gun. He's back at his
place now with the Doorman, thinking through what happened.
 Ring, ring. It's the phone again, and Ed worries it's the people sending him on
these message trips—but it's just Marv calling to give him a hard time about the
Annual Sledge Game.
 Ed tries to forget what happened with the man, but fails; then he tries to sleep.
 When he goes over to Marv's, he tells his best bud he's in for the game. Marv is
excited.
 Ed has the next day off, so he goes walking. He sees Sophie and she tells him
she misses him, and he checks in with her to make sure she's still running
barefoot. Yep.
 Then he talks to his dog, and surprisingly, his old buddy doesn't talk back
(because he's, well, a dog).
 Ed feeds the Doorman an ice cream as he waits for the next ace. He's sore
because of what happened at the Cathedral with the man the other night.
 He lets us in on his dirty little secret: it was attempted murder. Hmmm… that
makes us wonder what happened, but he doesn't tell us.

the visit
 A few days have passed, and nothing has happened. Ed begins to wonder if
anything will happen.
 He passes the time by thinking back to what happened with the man from Edgar
Street…
 One night Ed returns home after playing cards to find two balaclava-clad men in
his house eating pies, and before he can decide what to do, the men knock him
down and drag him through the kitchen.
 By the way, your dog has fleas and needs a bath, one of them tells Ed. They
gave him a pie though. When Ed asks if it was cooked, they're offended, and say
they're not savages. (Gee, he was thrown off by the fact that they broke in to his
house.)
 These two clowns call each other by name (Daryl and Keith) and tell Ed he's
been ungrateful. Ed figures out they're connected to the messages, and asks
who they work for.
  Daryl and Keith don't answer, but they do tell him this is all for the greater good.
What is this, some sort of terrible trust exercise?
 The guys joke around, complain about their balaclavas itching, and are all around
not your average hit men.
 Daryl and Keith take the gun from Ed, then they deliver a message of their own:
he's doing a great job so far. And they let it slip that they already know he didn't
kill the Edgar Street guy. Whoops.
 The last thing they do before leaving is give Ed another envelope.

the envelope
 Once Daryl and Keith have left, Ed gets up off the floor. He grabs the envelope,
worried it might send him on more dangerous assignments like Edgar Street.
 He opens it anyway, and inside he finds a letter and an Ace of Clubs. The letter
tells Ed a couple of things: (1) he's doing well; (2) they know he didn't kill Edgar
Street, but they like how he handed it anyway; (3) that scum bag got on a train to
never return; and (4) here's the Ace of Clubs, and good luck because it's no
picnic. Can you handle it?
 Challenge accepted. Ed looks at the card, ready for his next set of addresses,
but instead he finds these words: "say a prayer at the stones of home." What
does thatmean?
 Confused and annoyed, Ed leaves the card on the coffee table; he doesn't know
what to make of it.
 He pets the Doorman and realizes his head is bleeding. He should probably go
fix that.

just ed
 Ed needs help, which is pretty understandable since he's receiving random
messages on cards and doesn't even know how to interpret them and all. So he
heads over to Audrey's.
 When he gets there she's entertaining a male friend who asks who's at the door.
"Just Ed," Audrey replies.
 Ouch. Ed takes it hard. He doesn't like being "just Ed" so he turns and leaves,
but Audrey calls after him and says she'll stop by later.
 Ed wishes he were the guy in there with Audrey; he wishes he were more than
"just Ed" to her.
 Back at home, Ed thinks about the aces and imagines he has a full set, which
would be a great hand… except that he's not playing a game.
 Audrey comes over as promised, and has about a million questions about the
first card.
 He tells her all about reading to Milla, getting Sophie to run, and… he's guilty
about what happened with the Edgar Street guy. He finally tells us (or Audrey, to
be exact) what went down. He took the guy up to the Cathedral and stuffed the
 gun in his face; then he told him to leave town and never come back. Guns can
be pretty persuasive.
 But Audrey isn't convinced that was the best move. She asks Ed if that guy
deserved what he got, and he gets ticked off.
 It's kind of tense now, so Audrey breaks the ice by telling Ed he's her bestie. How
sweet.
 Ed tells us those words could kill a man. Then he rests with her next to him and
tries to decide what to do next.

cabs, the hooker, and alice

 On the road again, Ed drives a prostitute to work; she introduces herself as Alice,
even though people call her Sheeba.
 He tries to keep his eyes on the road, but sneaks a peak at her long legs
underneath her boots.
 She asks him to come back and pick her up in the morning, and he agrees.
 As he drives people around that night, Ed imagines her… at work. He thinks
about how she's really Alice, but becomes Sheeba when she works; then he
thinks about visiting her at work.
 He gets lost in his thoughts and confides to us that he likes not thinking about the
aces or Audrey for once.

the stones
 Ed goes about his mundane life. He drives, drops the cab off, walks home, has a
coffee with the Doorman, then goes and plays cards with his friends. Repeat.
 He's thinking about the next card, but he doesn't even know where to begin; even
when he's playing cards, his mind wanders to the Ace of Clubs.
 Marv mentions that chick he used to date—Suzanne Boyd—and Ed wants to ask
more about her, but he doesn't. Why? He's not really sure what to say.
 Then Ed asks Marv what he would do if he had to be somewhere right now, but
didn't know where. Marv isn't much help (who would be with that question?) and
says he'd be frustrated.
 Ed starts searching for the stone of home on maps, but it's no good; then he
reads to Milla and watches Sophie run again.
 One night he picks up a guy in his cab at 4 a.m. who asks to be driven home. Ed
isn't really sure where that is, but the guy is demanding.
 Ed drives, and thinks this guy is connected to the messages. The man tells Ed to
pull over, then runs off without paying—so naturally, Ed follows him to get his
money for the ride.
 As Ed is chasing after the guy, he worries someone will steal his cab—he left the
keys inside, so he's practically begging for it.
 He stops running, though, when he sees stones that he used to run past with his
brother, Tommy. They have three names carved in them: Thomas O'Reilly, Angie
Carusso, and Gavin Rose. Bingo.
  Back at the car, Ed's cab is still there, and the keys are too. Phew.

the priest
 Ed has no idea who these people are, so he searches the phone book. He finds
two O'Reillys listed, so he heads to the first house. There he asks the man if he's
Thomas O'Reilly, but this guy's name is Tony—Thomas is his bro who lives on
Henry St.
 Wait a minute, Tony says. Why do you want to know, anyhow? Ed tells the truth:
he's not really sure what he wants with Thomas yet.
 As Ed leaves, Tony asks if he can pass along a message to his brother (who's a
priest, by the way). Sure, Ed says. Here is the message: greed hasn't swallowed
me up yet.
 Cut to Ed talking on the phone with his brother Tommy. He wants to know if he's
the one sending the cards. His logic is that Tommy's the only one who knew
about the stones.
 After Tommy assures Ed that it's not him, they exchange a couple words and
hang up.
 Ed's going out to—what else—play cards with his friends, but on the way there,
he decides to stop to see this priest.
 As he's walking to O'Reilly's place, someone asks him for a cigarette, and his
jacket. Nice neighborhood, priest.
 Over at Ritchie's, Ed and his friends play cards and Ed wins.
 Audrey goes out of her way to smooth things over with Ed, and once things are
cool between them again, they talk about the cards.
 Ed points out that whoever's behind this seems to know him well, which Audrey
finds strange because no one knows him well.
 Ed heads over to Father O'Reilly's and is invited in for coffee. The guy is
welcoming, kind, and really down to earth, which isn't at all what Ed expected
from a priest.
 Father O'Reilly helps settle a fight outside. It's clear that this guy's good news to
the community.
 After some random small talk, Ed finally gets down to business. He tells the
priest that he's there for a purpose… he's just not sure what it is yet.
 We're not sure what we would say to such a cryptic message from a stranger, but
Father O'Reilly takes it all in stride, and tells Ed to have faith and things will work
out.
 Then he takes Ed outside and introduces him to the locals; O'Reilly tells them not
to bother Ed for cigarettes or his jacket. This guy's cool.
 Just as he's leaving, Ed remembers the message from the priest's brother and
delivers it to him.
 The guy is obviously moved by the message, but Ed's not really sure how.
 When Ed gets to Marv's place, his friends are watching Baywatch; He asks them
if they'd be up for going to church with him on Sunday. It's clear they aren't really
the church-going type, but Ritchie agrees. Why not? It could be fun—or funny. So
the others pile on, too.
  Later Ed's mom calls to remind him to call his sister for her birthday. Whoops—
he totally forgot. He's not winning brother of the year anytime soon, and even has
to call his mom back to get his sister's phone number.
 On Sunday, Ed, Marv, Ritchie, and Audrey all go to Father O'Reilly's church.
There aren't many people there, though, and it's pretty depressing.
 After the service Ed introduces Father O'Reilly to his friends. Marv says he won't
come to church again, but the priest takes it well.
 Then it hits Ed: O'Reilly needs his church to be full. Now if only he can get more
people to attend.

juveniles
 Ed thinks about how to get people into the pews at O'Reilly's church. Duh: free
beer. No one can turn up a no-cost pint, and Ed is so proud of his idea that he
runs to tell Father O'Reilly.
 There's just one problem, though: the church doesn't have money to buy beer.
Darn.
 Ed is glued to his plan, so he decides he'll raise five hundred bucks to get it
done—O'Reilly is surprised, but Ed tells him to have a little faith.
 Next step: get the word out. What good is free beer is no one comes? So Ed
decides he'll just spray-paint the message on Main Street. That should do it.
 Marv helps him do the job, and when the cops come round to the priest, the guy
claims to know nothing about it.
 Then the cops come to Ed's house and tell him to clean the spray paint off. Ed
says he will, and then he asks the cops if they're planning on going to the shindig
that Sunday at the church. Heck yeah, they are. It looks like the plan is working.
 Ed has a meeting with Father O'Reilly about the big day. The priest thanks Ed for
setting this up, and becomes the second person Ed helps who calls him a saint.
 Ed visits Milla and asks her to come on Sunday; then he visits Tony and invites
him. His brother sure would like to see him there, Ed tells Tony.
 Tony's in the middle of dealing with his kids fighting with one another, but says he
might make it Sunday.
 The day has finally arrived and all of Ed's friends get ready to go to the church.
Ed borrows Marv's beat up car to take Milla, which Marv gives him grief about
since Ed is always mocking it.
 At church, Father O'Reilly busts out a gnarly tune on his harmonica; the crowd
goes wild and O'Reilly starts preaching. It's not the usual fire and brimstone
church stuff either, and instead it's all about people helping other people out. He
closes out by praying.
 It's barbecue time, and Ritchie, Marv, and Audrey all help Ed out with the food
and beer.
 Ed notices that Tony did show up, and he's sitting down talking to his brother.
The day seems like a complete success.