Chapter Five

Discussion

This section focuses on the consultation and comparison of different researches to the major

results of the study tat have been identified. The literature review shed lit on various

assumptions, ideas, themes and theoretical background. As described in chapter four, analysis

illuminated the six themes. So, on the basis of those themes in general and the analysis in

particular, I have presenting the discussion session as follows:

Single Mother - Children Relationship: The results indicated that even in the presence of

immense financial issues and poverty the relationship between the children and their single

mother was very good. They were very close and shared every little tin with each other. The

mother said that her daughter and son are just like her friends. But the strain or tension existed in

their relationship due to the check and balance and some strict patterns made by the mother in

order to control her children. She didn’t allow her child activities for example wen her son

wanted to go to turkey wit is friends just for fun, she didn’t allow him. Moreover, she forbids her

daughter to spend excessive money on makeup products that are very expensive. So, this creates

disturbance in their relationship. Other tan tat , most of the time her children are out and come

home very late. So time poverty existed. When her children come from their universities they

spend the rest of time doing the assignments and preparation of quizzes. Her son likes to go to

the gym. So, the little time that is spared, is spent over there. She said that a sense of loneliness

overcomes her and in order to get over it, se offers prayers and recites Quran. Besides that, she

says that she needs tem (her son and daughter) to give her attention. Even though they are very

close, but there are certain things that se doesn’t accept. There are some habits of her son and

daughter which are intolerable for her. One example is her son’s choice of girlfriends. Se hated
all of them and wanted her son to be a little mature and choose wisely. Now if they spent plenty

of time together, this issue can be resolved. The result also showed that children support their

mother in income generating activities; this facilitates good relationship between the children and

the single mother. In the study, the mother also pointed out positive aspects of children living

with her such as; relief from stress, absence of conflict and tension, stability and emotional

security, freedom from violence, having closer family bonds. And this finding leads many to

believe that the loss of the father has less impact on the relationship that the children have with

their mothers (Aquilino, 1994).

Economic Problem of single mother headed families: the results of this study also indicated that

the main and most complicated stressor for the single mother family is financial problems.

Maintaining the previous standard of living, it became difficult for the mother to meet various

needs especially after the payment of fees. Since her children go to very high-end universities

and expenses of her daughters degree and assignments (Buying paints, fabrics, and other art

supplies) are also very high, so this becomes a cause of worry for the mother. Garfinkel &

McLanahan( 1986) explained that mother-only families are more likely to be poor because of the

lower earning capacity of single mothers.

Psychosocial challenges: Loneliness, helplessness, lack of hope and confidence was felt by the

single mother and se even believed that most of these problems occur are due to the lack of

financial assistance, worries associated with children and their future and economic hardships. A

mass of research reports that most of the single headed families are exposed to higher rates of

stress and depression. There are more stressful life conditions and a vicarious cycle of ongoing

strain followed by low income. Conger and Chao (1996) also noted that economic pressure, on

the other hand, has a direct effect on the psychological well-being of mothers, and probably
indirectly effects children’s psychological well-being by lowering the psychological wellbeing of

their mother.

Mother’s Role in Children Education: according to the study, the mother belongs to a low

educational background but still is very concerned about the education of her children. In fact,

the main purpose of not going for second marriage was the future of her children. She wants a

very bright future for her children that’s why she is facing financial challenges. Most of the

money is spent on the academic fees of her children and after that, she faces other economic

challenges. She reported if fees could be excluded; there would be no financial issue. Participant

single mother’s low educational status also constrained the support she could provide in assisting

her children do homework and other academic activities. However, this challenge can also be

true for intact families with low educational status as reported in Astone & McLanahan (1994).

Children’s Future: the mother wised her children to be self-dependent, well determined,

independent, highly educated and secure and treat her exactly like she treats them. She expects

really good from her children because she says she deserves the same. Moreover, she wants her

children to be in healthy relationships and make right choices so that they don’t suffer like she

did.

Support Systems for the mother: according to the mother, the emotional support is provided by

her sisters and brothers and other family members. She says that her sisters are her best friends

and they are her support system. They discuss everything with each other and provide social and

emotional support. On the other hand, the financial support is provided by her brothers. She

continued by saying that she never asks anyone to help her financially and tries to meet all the

financial needs on her own.

 Chapter Six

Conclusion and Implication for Social Work Practice, Future Research and Policy

5.1. Conclusion

This study has explored the experiences, challenges and difficulties faced by single mothers in

raisin their children. By using interview, qualitative data were collected from a single mother,

aged 45 in Lahore. The findings indicated that the experience of single mother in raising her

children is full of challenges. Financial challenges are on top of the list. The study area is a

middle class single headed family. Besides financial challenges, time poverty was also a very

important feature of this research experienced by the participant single mother. Busy and packed

schedules of her children give rise to time poverty which in turn is found to be a main factor in

eliciting a strained relationship between the mother and children. In contrast, when children start

spending a plenty of time with their mother, a positive attitude is developed which generates a

healthy mother-child relationship. The single mother in the study also reported certain

psychological challenges which include stress and depression. She also reported the presence of

feeling lonely and hopeless sometimes at the time of payment of annual fees of her children. All

these problems were the result of financial issues. The children were supportive and according to

their mother, understand her situation completely and don’t complain, but as she has to play the

role of a father as well, and sometimes forbids her children to spend excessive amount of money,

they become moody.

5.2. Implications for Social Work Practice, Future Research, and Policy

The findings of this study can be implicated in the field of social work and will be useful for

policy makers, researchers and social workers. Firstly, at the national policy level, there is very
limited definition of family structure and single headed families are not even included in the

definition. This gives rise to poor recognition of family groups. Policy makers should take down

the narrow perspectives of definition and should focus on more wide standpoints. Tis research

remarkably explains the single parent family. Hence, the first implication of the research is the

need for social workers to advocate an increasing recognition of the unique features and

challenges of single mother parents and their children.

Secondly, we want children of single mother families to have the same economic and social

possibilities as children of the nuclear family. This may involve calling for a positive

discrimination giving priority for single mother in interventions aimed at reducing and 53

alleviating poverty. Although some NGOs are doing exactly the same, the problems and

challenges that children of single mothers are enduring through , as the study indicated , are

massive that require scaling up efforts to help them.

Thirdly, focusing entirely on the enormous psycho-social challenges faced by children of single

mothers require the social workers to give importance to this issue. The social work intervention

should assist such children to cope up with such challenges. Government and private

organizations can play an important role in this regard. The research therefore calls for

recognition of the challenges of single mothers and a coordinated action to help ease these

challenges.

A further implication of this study is to keep in mind that a claim assuming that children are

better off in two-parent families may be driven by cultural assumptions. Public policy needs to

identify and support the strengths of every type of family, particularly single-parent families. It is

important to focus less on comparing children from one-parent families with those from two-
parent families and not label single-parent families “broken homes.” At the same time, the

educational system needs to place an emphasis on educating youths to be economically self-

supportive and good family members.

This research has pointed out the unique challenges of single motherhood and children of single

mothers though qualitative data. Further research can take up these findings as a starting point

and can investigate in detail the effect of single motherhood on children wellbeing though

comparative approach of life of children of single mothers and children of nuclear families.